#I talked a lot in English today
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who wants to know what my dog's name is
#i never use it bc its very polish and i tend to talk in english here#and also bc ive been paranoid for years abt random irl ppl finding me here who i wouldn't want to see this#(cause it happened once and it was awful <3)#but whatever. dog role bc i got quite sad today#cause she was obviously enjoying her walk and loving the sun#but she no longer has the energy to jump a lot#and if you're knew here! my dog used to jump so damn high. like 3 lengths her actual size#and she Loved that#i have a video somewhere on my old blog lmao gotta find a way to download that#but anwyays yeah it was her thing she was jumping like crazy#and im guessing the HEAT outside played a part in her not being in the mood for it today#but like 3 years ago or so it wouldn't stop her yet#so im :(#my baby's getting old.#dog LORE* not role omg#im not typing all that again rip
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Alright so my last fic, the doubloon one (TW WARNINGS if you decide to read it PLEASE CHECK THE TAGS) may or may not have allowed me to actually look a bit more at the parallels between Harumi and him (as in my hc of him, how I wrote him and all since skybound clearly didn't give enough info on the guy despite how much i want that)
So here's a list of parallels I made for the two! They're kinda far-stretched but all my stuff are that way so. idk what you're expecting kslqfglqzkh
There's the facade, the fact that they're both playing a role to the ones they have called families for a big part of their life. An attachment on Doubloon's side, and I feel like Harumi must have had feelings for her adoptive parents as well, at least a bit
But they both knew their plans were more important then that. Their objectives, and staying alive at all cost.
Then there's the Quiet One stuff. They don't speak, even if they know how to (in my fic Doubloon doesn't speak per say but he signs) and only their current associates are allowed to see their true colors, therefore to communicate with them, while still being lied to (I doubt Harumi said she was the princess to the sons of Garmadon? But I might be wrong this is more of a hc to me)
The whole Double Face thing with Harumi and her make-up / Doubloon and his changing face (which is the only thing in common they have that I mentionned in my fic)
and this is because before their situation in those forced-found-families (adoption for Harumi where she most likely didn't have a choice and the wish cursing and forcing Doubloon to be part of the crew), they knew better. They had another life, and they had another family, people they loved.
there might be more. I know there is. But my brain is already tired thinking of things so I'll leave it here for now.
I actually wanna write more stuff about those two. Maybe they go on an adventure together, and they kill people, spare no one and all that
idk something
#hat's words#hat's fics#doubloon#harumi#I talked a lot today didn't I. huh.#it's the after effects of a long day of work sorry#anyways#as always if there are things you don't agree with/would like to add feel free to do so!#we're all different we all have different pov and that's what makes it interesting#or if I'm wrong about something#which i might be tbh#also sorry for the terrible english#yeah
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I think the reason I’m liking QSMP so much is because that’s the most accurate representation of what people would actually do with live language translation. Slimecicle, el Mariana (I think) and iRoir all just saying cum/semen repeatedly just seems like something real guys would do if suddenly they can talk and be friends with someone who doesn’t speak their language. In fact I’ve seen this at school a *lot*
There’s two guys we’ll call Jaden and Jack. Jaden doesn't speak much english (can understand it but cant exactly speak it very well.) and he became friends with jack. jack is loud as hell and so is Jaden. jack also didn't know much spanish (other than like two words such as "good" and "like" things like that)
jack still became friends with Jaden just kinda naturally. they still made jokes n shit and although they're both assholes they at least laughed at people together, and Jaden taught him a bunch of swears in spanish.
if most people had live translation they probably wouldn't be using it to make super light conversation, most would be trying to make dumb jokes and be doing random shit. and I fucking love that. even with language barriers, people will still find a way to talk laugh and do dumb shit together.
(This was all rushed and I have been feeling very positive so my thoughts are not structured very well lmfao 👍👍 )
#bolt barks#I am in a hopeful mood today#the world doesn’t feel like ass for some reason#qsmp#I even had my own experience like this and I still talk to her a lot!#we met in kindergarten when she didn’t know much English but she’s super fluent now
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i know i keep doing this and dont follow thru but this time! drawing isnt making me absolutely miserable. im nearing finished w a piece and dont have too many ideas for anything new so: requests? suggestions?
#yes i could go back thru all the ones i never did but also i wont 💕#txt#if youre wondering if ive been drawing for days on end? yes. i go to work. eat. draw. sleep maybe 5h 👍 repeat v v healthy i promise <3#also ive been influenced . the jnfluencers got me. i have flower knows makeup now it arrived today and my GOD the packaging is stunning#anyway so. no more spendijg money this month ig#⬆️ yhis is completely irrelevant to the rest of the post#i just had to talk about it trust ive told everyone about the homophobic backpack debacle too#im talking a lot today good ol mouth diarrhoea <- u should use that in english just a suggestion adopt it
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feeling like a total asshole today 👍
#an aunt's mom passed away yesterday night#i didn't really know her that much just spoke to her a few times for the typical merry christmas & happy new year you know#so when my mom told me i felt bad for my aunt bc i knew they were really close but i don't feel SAD#but my parents seemed to be like so shocked and sad and my little brother even started crying#and i felt absolutely nothing#idek what my mom saw in my face but she went like 'don't you feel anything?' and like wtf am i supposed to feel#like. i'm sorry for my aunt and everything but i just?????#that already made me feel like an absolute asshole but now we have to go there (like 2hours away by car)#and because i am an adult now i *have* to go to the funeral home (?) today and to the funeral tomorrow#and i REALLY don't want to and thought it's making me so fucking anxious bc i haven't been there since my grandma passed away 2 years ago#i really don't want that feeling that i felt back then to come back#not right now#not when i've been starting to feel a bit better this past week#but i'm already failing at that because they started to come back the moment i was told i have to go#and i feel like a fucking asshole because my aunt's mom literally passed away and she (and her whole family) must be heartbroken right now#and all i can think about is that i'm anxious#i'm anxious to go back there. i'm anxious just thinking that i'll have to express my condolences to people that i don't even know#i'm anxious because i'll have to TALK to people and at least try to look a bit SAD but i can't just fake it#bc if i don't look sad my brain tells me that i'm an asshole that doesn't have feelings like apparently everyone around me has#but if i fake it my brain tells me that i'm an asshole bc why tf do i have to fake my fucking personality#why can't i just express my fucking feelings like normal people do and the only thing that i know how to do is fucking complain#like. i know i rant a lot here but it's literally the only place where i talk about my feelings#i NEVER talk about my feelings with anyone because idk HOW to do it#i have like a million things in my mind that i want to tell my mom or my therapy for example but when i finally convince myself to do it#i just CAN'T. the thoughts won't leave my mouth because i don't know how to phrase them properly#so nothing ever leaves my mind unless i make a post here bc apparently writing my thoughts in english (my 2nd language)#is easier than talking in spanish#and at least if i write them here they don't just stay bottled up in my mind#but i'm too tired of myself and my stupid brain that tells me that i do everything wrong :/#i'm gonna shut up now bc i once again reached the tag limit
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Hello! I heard you were making the aop sheets for qsmp characters! That's cool! May I ask for Felps '-' sheet?
I want to write about him for a really long time! He was one of my first ideas, but I was just... Keeping forgeting and leaving it for later... BUT NO MORE! HERE IT IS!
Felps was kinda the reason the Order was made, he were kidnapped by something no one know yet (yes, it was the federation);
He almost became a Existido! But he don't remember anything, just have some weird tattoos in his body;
He was the first one to bound with Richarlyson and while everyone was fighting he was taking care of him;
He don't like to fight directly, but would if ever needed;
He has narcolepsy;
Usually he don't interact with people, but hes not against engage in a conversation!
Felps é praticamente a razão da ordem ser criada, ele foi sequestrado por algo que ninguém sabe o que era ainda (sim, era a federação);
Ele quase virou um existido! Mas ele não lembra de nada, apenas tem algumas tatuagens estranhas espalhadas no corpo
Ele foi o primeiro a se aproximar do Richarlyson e enquanto todo mundo estava lutando no resgate, ele tava tomando conta do moleque;
Ele não gosta de lutar diretamente, mas iria se fosse necessário;
Ele tem narcolepsia;
Geralmente ele não interage com as pessoas, mas não é contra engajar em conversas!
#qsmp#I just need to say that the only ask in portuguese I recieved today was asking for Quackity#And I recieved a lot of asks in english asking for the brazilians#i think this is funny#ordem paranormal#i dont had so much things to talk about#this is weird bc I was thinking about him since the start#cellbit#aop#aop au
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I know its not as important as other research paths about the matter but I'd really like to know why a big portion of autistic people from spanish speaking countries prefer and sometimes start speaking english first even if no one from their families speak it.
#I work at a neurodivergency center in Chile and a lot of kids don't speak anything in spanish but do speak in english#or their first words are in english#it happened to me as a kid that I would pick some words from music#and I guess today content in english is more available for younger people#but its like. I basically learnt english by myself on the internet#talking with random people on the internet about my special interests#which I still do to this day XD#but I suspect there is something more about this phenomena but I dont have the clues on what exactly#I guess its a mystery#nahuel's nonsense
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Friendship cannot mean 'I have constant access to you 24/7', all right? It just can't.
I get being lonely. It sucks. But at some point you need to learn to manage that from time to time. That's part of being a grown up.
There will be times when your friends will be totally down to hang and chat for a long time, and times when they won't, and THAT'S. FINE. You cannot expect constant entertainment from someone like they aren't a real human being with their own worries, and bills, and responsibilities and- sometimes- EVEN A NEED FOR DOWNTIME THAT DOESN'T INVOLVE BEING SOCIAL. The fact that they are not always ready or willing to hang out and text for hours is not an attack on you, and behaving like it is is completely unacceptable.
Healthy friendship involves boundaries, and one of those boundaries is letting your friends have space. If you cannot respect that, then you might need to take some time and ask yourself if you're really all that good a friend.
#personal#read a book today that addressed this and it really struck a chord with me#when i was younger and not as good at enforcing boundaries i ran into this a lot and it. sucks. shit.#like a word of advice? that is the fastest way to kill a friendship because when you refuse to ever leave your friend alone even when#they have asked you too it quits feeling like friendship and it turns into a job.#i stopped looking forward to seeing and hearing from those people. i'd start getting panicky when i saw texts from them like 'what what WHA#CAN YOU POSSIBLY WANT FROM ME THIS TIME I TOLD YOU I'M TIRED I'VE BEEN AT SCHOOL ALL DAY LEAVE ME ALONE-'#it felt like not one single hour of my life was my own#i remember writing an essay in english class about how i didn't want to ever make any more friends because because having to babysit#constantly without ever getting a moment of respite was hard enough as it was- add any more people to be responsible for#and it would kill me. if this was the price of friendship i couldn't pay it. i would rather have been permanently alone.#when i went to college and started making some friends that actually understood and respected 'sometimes when i'm online i don't#want to talk i just want to veg' 'i can't have a long in depth text/discord convo when i'm at work' etc#it blew my mind.#those are the friends you want to keep.
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It's really weird when you know someone in a context different from how everybody else knows them so you look at them and you still kind of see that person they used to be
#this post is about the boy i dated my senior year who was so incredibly sweet tbh wouldnt be the person i am today if i hadnt met him#but he was so fucked up he had so many issues it was really hard so it didnt work out but i loved him and i think he loved me too#but hes in a moderately successful band now which i just found out about do i looked them up and theyre good#but its so weird because its like i know that when you were 17 you wanted to be an underwater welder#i helped you clean your room at your grandmas house because you were so sad you couldnt do it yourself#i ditched 5th period AP English to sit on the steps behind the auditorium and listen to you talk about whatever#you pushed me on the swings and we took the bus to the movie theater and you liked cherry wraps and you played me my favorite songs#i havent REALLY thought about that guy in years and we were only together MAYBE 6 months but its so weird what you remember about people#and especially how you remember how they made you feel because he made me feel so good like i was in control#all my previous relationships was me trying to desperately please someone who wouldnt do the same for me#and honestly a lot of my relationships since have been the same especially in college and with the one girl who honestly if she called me#today i would drop everything and go be with her again no questions because i cant get her out of my head#but stuff witj him was never ever like that it was so easy it was like breathing even though it ended messy i have 0 regrets#and its nice to know that things are going well for him because honestly he changed my life a little bit#the way i dont give a fuck now is something i learned from him#ill probably delete this later but you know
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changed my mind about the toiling thing i said yesterday… toiling for a 10 hour workday is unquestionably preferable to a job where you just have to be there for the duration and not do anything while keeping up the appearance that you’re doing a job. busywork filled desk jobs are hell (to me)
#haven’t worked a desk job in years but the desire to fall asleep at a job like that is torturous#instead of toiling today im on day 2 of training someone which means a lot of standing around watching them do the work#and it’s so fatiguing despite still being on my feet all day#the person i’m training also speaks absolutely minimal english (and i speak absolutely zero ukrainian) so there isn’t even conversation to#pass the time…. instead i’m here talking to you (whoever reads this)#hi how are you#beets posts
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I'm going to start using a taser on people for their bad, simplistic takes on the Troubles and the IRA
#it's one of those things in which like 80% of people clearly don't know what they're talking about#but insist on having strong opinions anyway#this goes for both sides tbh#and the number of times I've seen well-meaning people#reduce it to a 'religious conflict' between Catholics and Protestants#is wild#and today I just saw someone claim 'the Irish invented modern terrorism' because other terrorist groups copy the IRA'#the IRA car bombs and 'mass shootings'#when the IRA... didn't do mass shootings?#that literally wasn't even their method#and I don't think I've ever seen an English person with an actual good grasp of the Troubles#even the majority of people on the Republic don't have a good grasp of the Troubles#which is something a LOT of people in NI have expressed as a frustration#and I hardly pretend to be an expert#and I obviously didn't experience it firsthand#but I try to be aware of my knowledge limitations
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My cousins play this game "Subway Surfers" like, is that what the new generation does now? When I was their age I didn't even know how to pronounce that it was just το παιχνίδι με τα τρένα how tf would I know it was called "Subway surfers"? Tf is that
#tsktsktsk these new generation kids knowing how to say English words ts#im kidding obviously#but like... i probably found out it was called subway surfers when i was like ... what?12?#i still remember searching παιχνίδι με τρενα on play store cause i didn't know what it was called#the first time i found out about this game was when i saw a girl playing it on dance class#from afar and i thought it was the coolest thing#but i didn't know what it was#also im going through a subway surfers phase#i spent more than 2 hours playing today#wtf is wrong with me#ive unlocked a lot of skins tho#i never managed to get these many#i even have 3 specials#one of them has thunders while running#the fernado guy#i even know them by their names now help#sugarenia talks#sugarenia thoughts#sugarenia has family
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9 times out of 10 I’m gonna fuck up and pronounce it “Massive Two Shits” instead of “Massachusetts” and I am very sorry.
My mouth doesn’t do enunciation too good and you require me to pronounce all of the letters very specifically.
#for the record half my family is Eastern European so like my pronunciation skills are a problem everywhere#though the ‘settled communities geeeations ago’ and like ‘the Ukrainians and Polish bonded with the local Indigenous peopl’#means that those three getting together are responsible for what my English sounds like today#(for the record a lot of Eastern European settlers in Canada were running from Russia. so. very little has changed.)#there’s also the Germans who probably did not help make the already rural accent sound like ‘Good Respectable English’#I said once ‘you might not place it. people from here do their best not to sound like it once they leave.’#which feels like it says a lot about how I feel about language policing without context#sometimes words mean different things for different people ‘cause their slang comes from different root languages#gotch are fun because it’s such a common phrase I know but it’s based in Ukrainian and a bunch of Eastern Canadians were talking shit#like that it wasn’t a real thing until I pointed out it was pronounced more like ‘gitch’ and is probably from Weatern Canada more#‘cause more Ukrainian settlers in western Canadian history.#accents. are fuckin weird
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so what you are telling me is its that bad.
#hi (explosions)#turns out my fear of being disliked and/or hated by authority figures is much much worse than i thought#(<-he had to ask permission to go to the bathroom and had a panic attack because his teacher was a tiny bit rude to him in a subject that/#/was not about him at all and was a misunderstanding + the teacher even apologized later)#ahem anyway. i did not know i could cry as silently as i did today#im better now. i'll be fine in approximately ten minutes now that im home#its our english teacher she had a tiny misunderstanding of a situation and said something like ''its a terrible feeling when you feel/#/betrayed by a person you saw as an equal and cared a lot about'' (me) and after seeing me breakdown so quickly she realised that wasnt/#/what happened.#still! terrifying#do not mind how normally im talking about it here i was very much so trembling. on the other hand i am perfectly fine and everythings okay#not as unrelatedly as i'd like it to be i got peer-reviewed for bpd by a friend today. great#♚ — vent !#i guess?
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I was thinking “haha it’s so weird and silly i got soOOO into this one very specific part/arc/related minor-ish character group of a franchise, i haven’t done that before have i? this is a new weirdness for me isn’t it?”
and then suddenly vividly remembered my inconvenient and untenable and frankly quite extreme obsession with the romulan star empire all throughout middle school, with such force and clarity that i had to put a hand to my face
#i would absolutely have made a Discord For Romulan Likers#that was still a bit different though since a portion of that came from an instinct to subvert#bc i felt like what some of TNG era canon did with Romulans basically being pre programmed to Do Betrayal was silly needed deconstructing#(and at the same time was intrigued by how a society of people like that COULD function if taken at face value)#whereas my hangup on the village arc and Ganja is bc i rly rly rly like the story + characters (also feel Longing (tm) instilled by tragedy#and wanted to talk about them a lot and nearly all english language spaces for MiAbyss were just crammed with the s1/movie parts/characters#and not my Special Sillies#like obviously theres no ‘hey ONLY talk about season two of the show’ rule on the server. that would be unhinged#but i made it because the rest is always getting discussed everywhere else so i hope that focus is ok with everyone and hopefully that’s no#uncouth of me to acknowledge that i personally made it for that specific reason. wait this got off topic. THE ROMULANS…. RIGHT#anyway i remember i was kinda grumpy at how much stuff Klingon Likers had in comparison#you can learn Klingon#you can’t learn Romulan!! (real ones know its called Rihan and not Romulan though)#(the Romulans call themselves the Rihannsu. i believe thi is 100% extracanonical material though)#(ebil did you really get tipsy on a tuesday night and start rambling about Romulans???? yes. yes i did. )#(look i had a difficult appointment today i deserve it)#anyway it’s actually insane that i never read Diane Duane’s series abt them#i didn’t really have internet purchasing power and was restricted to what was at the library and easily available online#i should read those books eventually#i still have a soft spot for them pointy eared maniacs
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