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deliciousdefendorinternet · 24 days

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Okay, this has honestly been in the back of my mind for years now, but I feel like I must ask. Did anyone else feel an immense feeling of anger/discomfort when Poppy brought the entire village into Branch's bunker? Because I did. When I first saw it, I felt uncomfortable. And to this day, I get the ick thinking about it. Like, I get why she did it, and I understand that it was the safest thing to do for the village, but like... I can't explain just how upsetting it was to me. Branch is a better person than I am, because if it were me, just... no. And she didn't even ask properly! And then had the audacity to say it was a solid burn returned like??? No? No it wasn't? That was a home invasion, not a snipe back at him, what? In what world is his comment on her life skills even remotely on the same level as her just letting the ENTIRE VILLAGE in his house? And they weren't even good houseguests either! They IMMEDIATELY started messing with his stuff, like, have these trolls never heard of proper guest etiquette? Look, I love Poppy, but she can seriously get on my nerves a lot. Especially since the movies made it so that in the end, she doesn't really learn much because her screw ups have a way of completely disappearing with little to no consequences.

To add to this, anyone else feel like when rewatching the first Trolls movie, that Branch was in the right, and that he was done so dirty by so many? Like, the ukulele scene. As a kid, I did think Branch was being rude, but now? Those 2 were literally out in the woods, with who knows what out there. Poppy literally got her friends kidnapped by a BERGEN literally the DAY BEFORE, and she's going back to singing loudly? Like, Poppy, babe, are you TRYING to die? Her whole song just shows how much plot armor Poppy has because, seriously? Not to mention, trolls are tiny, so her singing could genuinely put a target on them. I feel like the only reason Branch didn't up and say this is because it probably should be common knowledge, but apparently, pop trolls don't really have much common sense. I really wish they had Branch explain it though, because as a kid, I thought him to be a killjoy and unnecessarily bossy. But now? Yeah, I can see why singing in the forest when you're tiny might not be the best idea. Makes me wonder just how the pop trolls survived all this time?

I love Poppy, I really do. She's fun, nice, and is a complex protagonist (who is awesome and not a Mary Sue, though the same can't be said for TBGO/Trollstopia Poppy) whose character development is very visible. However, the writers really focus more on Branch's character development than hers and focus more on finding new ways to traumatize him than finding ways to make Poppy more mature, and that's what really bugs me about Poppy's character.

I really wanna start a petition for DreamWorks to lay off Branch for once and give Poppy more attention. I'm not asking to all out traumatize her (though the idea of DreamWorks giving her the Branch Treatment is funny in the mean way) but it would be nice if they gave her another journey where she has to learn and grow, and for there to be consequences that aren't easily waved away by a song and dance. TWT did a decent job at it (it could have been better, but it was a start), and I really need DreamWorks to do something like that (but better, obviously) again.

That being said, I do like how they handled Broppy. They went from rival/strangers to friends to lovers. It didn't happen instantly, and the progression of the relationship didn't feel rushed or forced. They both have an equal standing in the relationship and are supportive of each other. It's cute, and I'm glad DreamWorks at least got that right.

This should have probably been separate asks, but oh well. YOLO or whatever. I just really wanna know your thoughts.

I'm mostly of the same mind it angers me but I get why she did it I feel at the very least she should have told everyone to behave themselves and not act like they were teenagers throwing a house party while their parents were away for the night.

some people have said that maybe she did in on purpose to pressure Branch into going with her but I prefer to think that wasn't the case because in my opinion that would be straight up villainous.

a Royal abusing their power to put pressure on a civilian to Risk their life to rescue a group of your friends who are in danger due to your incompetent leadership.

not to mention a civilian who she knows is more terrified of the Bergens than anyone else in the village.

yeah that would make her an out and out villain imo so I prefer to think that wasn't her intention.

I don't feel its so bad it needs to be changed in the story overall but I would have liked it had Branch actually called her out on it.

basically just have him angrily point out to her after she acts like it wasn't a big deal because it was just a bunch of old Junk. that it wasn't just a place to him it was his home and that wasn't just a load of old Junk it was stuff he worked hard for years to make and it made him feel safer it was the only place he actually felt safe and like he could relax.

maybe prompting Poppy to actually give a more genuine apology as before she just thought of his home as him being over the top for the sake of it.

since she and the village just viewed him as a Drama queen and she didn't really realise his fears were actually so genuine that the Bunker actually mattered to him that deeply.

part of me thinks the intent by the writers was for her consequences in the first film to be being betrayed by Creek who she cared about but yeah that whole thing could have been handled better.

her and her dads leadership put him in danger and he literally said what he had to say in order to avoid being eaten alive he didn't really have any agency in the betrayal.

so Poppy's somber pleas for him to not go through with it kinda make me mad tbh like this whole situation is your fault yet my guy Creek is expected to die because of it.

so your incompetent dad can live? yeah no.

also if you made that Petition for Branch I'd totally sign it 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

and I agree Poppy deserves some more focus and development tho a touch of angst for her I think could maybe be a good thing in making her character stronger.

like I've said before maybe having Peppy die in a future film and her at first trying to ignore her grief by focusing on her queen duties and slapping on her usual smile worrying both Branch and Viva.

or having her mother turn up in the future like some fans have suggested only for her to be a selfish villain who couldn't care less about Poppy and Viva.

and this is the proper shock to Poppy's "" family is always great "" mentality as even with Bro zone they worked things out in the end making her think no family could be entirely broken.

but her mother literally doesn't give a shit if her children live or die and she maybe abandoned them both when Poppy was a baby.

drawing a little contrast with Branch only for the mother to have zero remorse since she didn't want children and maybe she was only with Peppy for status as royalty.

and Bro zone could be shown as being more remorseful over the past even a while after the events of TBT which contrasts with Poppy's mom kinda nicely.

anyway I'm getting off topic a bit lol but yeah I agree Poppy needs more focus and Branch's needs to be picked on less by the writers.

but I feel a touch of angst directed Poppy's way could give her some good development and make her a stronger character overall.

edit. also as someone who doesn't like Hugs Poppy's smug stunt with the Hug time Bracelets does make me a little mad like tell the Trolls to Respect people's Boundaries Girl.

#trolls #dreamworks trolls

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o-anon-o · 4 years

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Diaval x Reader (Maleficent’s daughter)

Summary: Inspired by what Aurora has done, reader volunteers to venture to a nearby kingdom to make peace between more humans and the Moors. Though she is welcomed as a guest, she’s been gone for quite some time and has begun to miss the comforts of home. That is, until a certain raven shows up missing her just as much.

A/N: Yo. Might do some more of these “shorts” Idk. I rewatched both Maleficent movies and realized there isn't enough Diaval out there. I wanna write these little fics for funnzies on the side. I might be into it. If you’re into it *shrugs* lmk. Don’t forget to smash that like button and ring that bell to turn notifications on.

Words: 3,191

It had been hours since curfew had passed. The entire castle had fallen silent under the dark blanket of night. Everyone was undoubtedly asleep, everyone but you. You found this to be your regular nightly routine. You found it incredibly hard to fall asleep in a castle this large, how the nobles did it each night baffled you.

Two moons had surely passed since you last saw the rivers of the Moors. Though you missed it, you knew that what you were doing was right. If others were willing to sacrifice their comfort for peace, you must do the same. You had always seen the world a different way than your mother. Where she saw greed and weakness, you saw beauty, wonder and hope. Hope that one day there might be peace between humans and the magical creatures of the Moors. So that one day they would be able to travel passed their boarders and venture beyond what little they knew. When you closed your eyes you imagined the pixies and other creatures laughing and singing among human folk, in peace.

Aurora was the one who pushed you to do this. Though she was ten years younger than you, she still shared the same dream you did. After marrying Prince Philip she had created that peace you dreamed of for so long. The Moors and humans were united by their marriage. It was peace, but only a small sliver of what could be. That’s why you decided to venture West to meet with other Kings and Queens to create peace treaties. People were scared of the unknown. That’s why you thought presenting yourself, a fairy, was a good idea. Once they met you and learned about your home, they would be more open to coexisting.

Your mother was against it.

Aurora was on your side.

Diaval... He offered to accompany you. You denied it, however. He was needed in the Moors to help protect the creatures and to keep an eye on your mother.

At the thought of him, your hand mindlessly traveled down to your wrist where a small woven bracelet laid. He had given it to you the night before you left. You were sure it was intended as a simple parting gift, to remind you of home whenever you looked at it. You couldn’t help but feel a small tug at your heart at the thought of home. You closed your eyes at the memory of the way that the air smelt in the early morning. The lily petals blowing in the autumn breeze.

Home.

Your eyes opened, you were standing in front of the vanity in the dim, candlelit room. There was no smile on your face, you could see that as you examined yourself in the mirror. Reaching for the brush on the table, you absentmindedly combed through your hair. Surely you would be able to return home soon. The King had welcomed you as a guest. As far as you could tell, there was no ill intent. In fact, these humans reminded you a lot of Prince Philip’s father. Open-minded and willing to listen. You knew you may not get that lucky with other kingdoms.

You saw your hair blow from the breeze that was trickling in from the open window across the room. Feeling the hairs on the back of your neck start to rise, you walked towards the window, reaching for the shutters, but something in the corner of your eye caught your attention. To your left, perched on one of the carved out statues next to the window was a familiar black raven you hadn’t seen in what felt like forever.

With a small smile, you raised your finger out, inviting it to lay on your hand. The raven didn’t hesitate, in fact it had all ready jumped onto your finger when you had just held it out. Leaving the window open, you leaned against its frame facing the inside of your room. The raven jumped up into the air, while you had waved your other hand out lightly, emitting gold magic from your hand as you saw him transform into the man you had missed most of all.

“Thank you for that.” Diaval shook his head, straightening out his attire. The feathers on his jacket shook slightly, a few falling to the ground as you nodded, staring at the man.

He took a moment to look around the room. The castle’s stone walls had elegant carvings on the trim of the walls. The bed was immaculate, gold lining the posts on each end. There was even gold on the windowsill. It was nice, a warm beautifully decorated guest room, the only thing that didn’t seem to belong in the room was them.

“well this is nice...” He looked back at her finally.

“I’ve slept in worse places that’s for sure.” You felt a smile creep onto your face upon hearing his familiar voice.

“Indeed.” He mimicked your smile, walking towards the large wardrobe on the other end of the room and running his hands over the gold lining.

“Were you spying on me?” You asked, a mischievous glint in your eye.

“I beg your pardon?” He asked. His attention landed back on you.

“Just then, outside. Why didn’t you make yourself known?” You nodded towards the window. “Are you here to report back to my mother?” You asked, pushing yourself off of the wall and standing up straight, crossing your arms. It had been so long since you had seen anyone. You were sure Maleficent would have sent Diaval sooner, or even sent you a letter asking you to report back. Nevertheless, he was welcomed here, and always would be.

Diaval shook his head. “No she has no idea I’m here.” You were taken aback when he said that. It wasn’t like him to keep things from her. He was loyal to her, that much was clear.

“Then why are you here?” You asked, stepping closer. You could see Diaval swallow nervously. His smile had dissipated, once you had stepped closer. After a moment of silence you let out a shaky breath. “Has something happened?” You asked.

“Nothing’s happened. Mistress misses you, she hasn’t said it but she grows impatient for you to come home.” Diaval spoke clearly. “I thought I would come by to see how they were treating you to give her some semblance of peace.”

“Right.” After his comment about Maleficent not knowing he was here, you had hoped he came for a more personal reason. “I'm quite fine. They’ve treated me very well.” You said matter-of-factly, hand on your hip. Diaval scanned your face, and then his eyebrows rose when he saw what you were wearing.

“I can see that now. They have you fitted like a proper lady. Fitting, I think. You’ve always been royalty. It’s about time you started dressing like it, m’lady.” He teased. A small blush crept onto your cheeks once you had locked eyes with him after he had looked you up and down. It had been too long since you’ve bantered with this man. You had to admit you were caught off guard by that comment.

Rightfully, the Moors should have been given to you instead of Aurora. It was Maleficent’s intention to have you rule as her successor, however you had thought it was a good idea to have Aurora rule. At the time there was no better way to unite the humans and the magical creatures than to have a human step in and care for them. With a bit of convincing, Maleficent agreed. Uniting both kingdoms proved to be a more substantial change though.

Ruling was never something that interested you. You’d much rather spend your time with matters of peace keeping and be left as a free spirit. Your attire... that was a whole different story. As your mother wore gowns that drifted past her wings, you preferred to wear things you could actually fly around in. That meant no long dresses, no laces or bows that would drag behind you in the wind.

“If this is how a lady should be properly dressed, then I don’t think I can consider myself a lady.” You rose a brow, making him chuckle.

Diaval’s gaze trailed down to your side, finally resting on your wrist. He delicately reached down and held your hand out.

“At least you haven’t forgotten where you come from...”

Your eyes followed his. They had wandered down to your wrist where the bracelet he had given you was laying.

Before he could land a kiss on the back of your hand, you cleared your throat, redacted your hand and walked past him back to the vanity. You faced the mirror and began to remove the earrings that you had on. Tonight you were dressed more proper than you could ever remember being dressed before. You had a meeting with the king to discuss the future of your kingdoms, you were required to look your best to represent the entirety of the Moors. It was an uncomfortable evening, probably for you alone. Everyone else you faced tonight seemed to be in their element, besides you. The memory hit you like a train as you detangled the earring from your hair and placed it on the jewelry tray in front of you. You felt ridiculous.

“This ridiculous thing is impossible to breathe in.” You mumbled to yourself. You caught Diaval’s eye staring at you from the mirror. “What?” You asked coarsely.

“You look beautiful nonetheless.” He said upmost sincerely. You remained frozen for what felt like hours, but was for just a few seconds before you had the courage to look away from him.

Beautiful. You couldn’t recall a time when he had called you that. He was a dear friend. While you grew up spying on Aurora, you and he had become close without a doubt. He was your best friend, your confidant and it took every power within you to deny his presence with you when he had asked to accompany you. Truthfully, you wanted to allow him to come. But that would be selfish. You knew he was needed there. No matter how badly you wanted him to stay, you knew that he couldn’t stay.

You glanced at him with a brow raised through the mirror. You didn’t realize that your eyes had become glassy until you saw them through the mirror. “Is that the only reason you came here?”

Diaval walked towards you with an uncertain look in his eyes. He seemed distracted, or perhaps deep in thought. You asked because you initially knew something was going on with him since he flew into your room. You watched him intently as you dropped the second earring into the tray.

Another soft silence fell between the two of you. This one felt long and slightly uncomfortable. Like there were a million words lingering in the air that needed saying, yet neither of you had spoken them. Not until he was behind you, warmly emitting a familiar heat you had missed so dearly.

Your breath hitched when you felt his hand delicately trail up the sides of your arms, over your shoulders and finally stop behind your neck where you could feel him work at the necklace clasped behind your neck, assisting you with removing the shiny piece of jewelry you detested having to wear all evening.

Truth be told, Diaval didn’t even realize he was flying in the direction of the castle until he had all but reached the destination.

Two moons.

He had counted.

He wondered how many more would have to pass until you were able to come home. He had missed how things used to be. The witty banter the two of you shared on a daily basis, the way both of you would worry over Aurora, the times shared convincing Maleficent that Philip was right for her. But the moments he missed most was when you would fly over the headwinds and race each other to the forest’s edge. At the thought of how peaceful you once looked back then, he couldn’t help but softly smile at you through the mirror.

He remembered one particular moment you two shared while Philip was courting Aurora. The forest creatures had come together to make a beautiful song for the two as they had danced under the moonlight. The sparkling pixies glittered around them as they shared the moment together. He was watching it from afar next to you. That’s when things had changed for him. He knew that same love that Philip felt for Aurora was the love he felt for you. Though he had no inclination on how to act on it, he knew it was there.

With that thought lingering in his mind for almost a year, he had to admit he had felt a sting when you had so quickly declined his offer to accompany you on your journey. At first he hadn’t understood why, but it soon grew increasingly clear when his duties in the Moors picked up with your departure. He was thankful, really. It had kept his mind occupied throughout the day. Instead of worrying about you, he had helped his mistress keep things running smoothly.

“I miss you as well.” He said it so softly you almost missed it. It dawned on you that in all the time you had known him, you hadn’t been separated for this long. Part of you felt ashamed for not seeing how this separation may be affecting him. The other part of you was excited that he had missed you just as much as you had missed him.

You turned around, looking him uncertainly in the eye. His eyes were black, the blackest black one could imagine. Yet they always held deep emotion. There he was standing directly in front of you. The man you had missed most from home. You hadn’t realized when it happened, but your feelings towards him had changed exponentially. It was further increasing the longer you were away from home. His eyes never left yours, you could feel his breath on your face as you both stood frozen in the moment.

“Do you?” You muster up the courage to say, seemingly trying to continue the banter. It was weak. Your voice was coarse from the way your heart was almost beating out of your chest. By the look on his face, he could tell you were at a loss for words. The rose hue on your cheeks was visible even in the dimly lit room.

“The Moors aren’t the same without you flying overtop them each morning. The sun isn’t as warm. The water isn’t as serene and the stars aren't as bright. I miss you like a desert misses rain.” He spoke just as softly as he did a moment ago. His hands gripped the vanity on either side of you, fighting the urge to hold you in his arms and finally reach out and hold you. He had waited too long to see you. He thought he could make it until your return, but he had never been more wrong. Worried he may lose his chance, he needed to see you.

“I know that I’m just a raven, not even really a man but--”

You couldn’t take it any longer. He had drawn you in a long time ago. You placed your hands on either side of his face delicately, moving your soft lips against his. The instant you did, it felt like a dam had broken inside of him and he had finally wrapped his hands around your delicate body, pulling you in as close as he could. Kissing you as if he was about to wake up from a dream, he wasted no time. The time you had spent apart was far too much anyway. You had to make it up somehow.

You pulled back for a moment, searching his dark eyes for any sense of hesitation or regret. There was none there that you could see.

“I missed you too.” You spoke without another second to waste.

With a new-found boost of courage, he plunged forward and captured your lips in another kiss. This one he was more prepared for. You felt your arms trail down to his lapels, pulling him closer to you, not allowing him to stop. It’s not as if you would need to tell him that. Unbeknownst to you, he had no intention to stop. Your mouths moved together in harmony as he held you tightly in his arms. The pace had quickened from your timid peck you had given him just a moment ago. The unfamiliar feeling of his lips against yours didn't frighten you. Instead, you were surprised with how natural tasting him felt. If anyone had seen the two of you together they would, without a doubt, imagine you had done this many times before.

You had realized in this moment, he was your home. So long as he was nearby you felt at ease and safe, Moors or not. As he held you, you grew increasingly more electrified. Every finger graze that trailed passed a part of your skin was magnetic. It had your mind go foggy and your stomach do flips as he deepened the kiss, eliciting a soft moan from your mouth into his.

“Diaval...” you had whispered his name once you had reluctantly pulled back, leaning your forehead against his. The sound of his name slipping past your lips that way was a sound he wanted to hear a million times over. Eagerly, he had placed soft chaste kiss on your lips once more before opening his eyes to look into yours.

“What is it? Anything.” He spoke out of breath.

With a soft smile you trailed your hands back up to his soft face, feeling him calm even more at your touch. “It’s late.”

He blinked a couple of times before realizing that you were right. With a short nod he began to untangle himself from you. “Of course.” he cleared his throat.

You had become confused. Without a second of hesitation you wound your hands around his neck to keep him in place.

“I meant that as an invitation to stay here tonight. You flew all this way.” You assured him that you very much enjoyed his presence. Pulling him back into you, your lips hovered above his for a few moments, seemingly acting like a magnet as he followed them with his own. “Fly back tomorrow, stay tonight. Please.”

With a request like that, how could he say no? For tonight, you wanted to act selfish. You wanted to think of yourself over what was expected of the two you. You wanted to revel in this happiness forever, but tonight would have to do for now. Tomorrow came with more diplomacy, more treaty talk and more of that without him by your side. You didn’t want to marvel in that at the moment. Right now you wanted nothing but him, tonight, right now.

You hadn’t felt this at home in a long time.

#maleficent #diaval #diaval x reader #diaval imagine #maleval #disney #disney imagine #sam riley #maleficent imagine #daughter!reader

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t4tlawlight · 4 years

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Occam's razor is the principle that, of two explanations that account for all the facts, the simpler one is more likely to be correct.

this post is going to cover traits specific to the manga and the television drama, since those are the best adaptations to showcase L’s autism. THIS POST is required reading before you read anything i’m about to type, because it explains what kind of character niche L falls into--an unintentionally autistic coded character. i’ll talk more about that at the end.

i’m going to talk about manga L first, since he’s the original version after all. i’m going to go in order of physical traits, to behavioral, to his character writing. also, tumblr eats posts that have outside links, so i’m going to have my non-tumblr sources in a separate post, here.

anyways, more under the cut!

MANGA/ANIME:

sitting with his legs up and spine bent / sitting on the floor

this is such a big one and its extremely common in ppl with autism. sitting in chairs normally is uncomfortable to outright painful w many ppl with these disorders, myself included. L sitting like that (which, to recall, is a blatant homage to sherlock holmes, another character that is so blatantly autistic coded you can find absolutely ridiculous amounts of writing on the topic) and being like "I HAVE TO SIT LIKE THIS TO THINK PROPERLY" is so autistic. like sitting in a certain way to give you specific sensory stimulus/avoid distracting discomfort and pain is a thing. i found this post (1) written by an autistic person on the topic of sitting in chairs being uncomfortable, and it says as much:

“I suspect that seating discomfort is common in autism (though by no means limited to autistic people). Many of us, particularly as children, benefit greatly from chairs designed to be non-stationary: rocking chairs, “fidget” chairs, and so forth. These can improve focus, compensate for proprioceptive hypo-sensitivity, and alleviate restlessness. In short, many “attention issues” can be fixed simply by providing a little motion for the person sitting. Small change, huge results. That's what accommodations do at their best. They make (often minor) adjustments that have profound impacts.”

so when L says that sitting the way he does, for a specific sensory experience, improves his ability to think, it’s perfectly in line with this idea. Also it’s a good pressure stim.

standing with a slouch / shifting his weight around

to begin: yes! it’s very common for autistic people to stand or walk oddly for a number of different reasons, from physical comorbidity to other issues such as dyspraxia (see: movie L). From an article by YAI (2), an I/DD (intellectual and/or developmental disabilities) community program:

“Kyphosis (a curved spine), collapsed chest, dropped shoulders and even scoliosis are observed in many of our patients. These myriad of postural issues may result from reduced strength, decreased biomechanical stability, or from a sensory impairment, such as apraxia.

Depending on the scene, L has mild to severe kyphosis which is very common in autistic individuals. Other things mentioned in that article if you want to click on it is instability in standing, where you sort of shift your weight around a lot between your feet or rest all of your weight on one foot, which L is literally doing the first time we see all of him.

speaking with a monotone voice.

i obviously can’t show a picture for this one and it honestly depends on the voice actor you find for L, but in the anime in particular L has a very flat tone. a lot of this is bc he has a dry sense of humor but. just know that it’s very common for autistic people to have a flat affect (or go the other way into being too loud/emotive).

his eating habits.

a lot (a LOT) of autistic ppl myself included can only eat certain kinds of food for texture and flavor reasons. HOWEVER there’s a term in the autism community called “samefoods” which is really well put by tumblr users candidlyautistic and autism-asks:

“Samefoods or samefooding is a community word to describe the autistic trait of eating the same food over, and over and over . . . It is part sensory, part routine driven in most cases. A lot of times we samefood because we need that particular mouthfeel / texture / taste, and a lot of times even after that need passes, it turns into a need for routine until you actively dislike that food again.”

“Samefooding on the other hand is closer to a special interest. When I have a samefood (chocolate ice cream, currently), I really, really want that food. I could eat that food endlessly and not get tired of it. I will get upset if I’m not able to have the food in a day. For me, it usually is kind of routine based as well. For instance, with my current samefood, I have some in the evenings and it’s become part of how I wind down from my day.”

we don’t know exactly why L specifically desires sweet food or if he considers it part of his routine, but what we do know is that he really wants to eat sweet food and avoids eating anything other than sweet food, so it could either be that he’s a picky eater and can’t handle savory or he’s samefooding on sweets!

wearing the same clothes

L wears the same clothes every single day. It’s also worth noting that what he does wear is baggy, too-big clothing, the kind that wouldn’t be tight and uncomfortable. once again, sensory issues are a huge thing for autistic individuals. one of my favorite aspects is that in no adaptation does he wear socks. even L wears shoes, he wears them like slippers, not putting them on all the way. people comment that he seems like he’s poor, but we know for a fact that he’s very rich and that wearing these clothes is a personal choice he made.

not caring for himself/outsourcing his self-care

i don’t think one day is exactly canon, rather it’s an exaggeration of what might actually happen--i.e. L doesn’t have a huge closet full of the same outfit, but he does have several versions of the same outfit on rotation; L doesn’t use a human washing machine, but Watari might help him/encourage him to bathe regularly. One Day is a parody comic, but it was made by the creators for a reason and that reason is that L pretty obviously relies on a caretaker (Watari) for his personal needs. Watari, in the manga proper, cooks and cleans and does most things for L. we’ll come back to this topic when we get to the drama though.

doing stimming behaviors

if you don’t know what stimming is, it refers to self-stimulating behaviors, usually involving repetitive movements or sounds. everyone stims to some extent, but in autism it tends to be more obvious, go on for longer, and sometimes be more disruptive to others. it’s often used to help deal with sensory overload, or used to express feelings--think of an autistic person being happy and flapping their hands in the air.

there are a LOT of instances of L displaying stimming behavior, from stacking his food or things on his desk, to spinning in his chair, to biting his fingers/using them to press on his lips, to wriggling and tapping his toes. here are some specific instances:

there are a lot more. i’ll talk about more when we get to dramaverse, but if you rewatch/reread death note it’s definitely worth noting whenever L does something like this!

detective work as a special interest

ok, first and foremost i want to establish what a special interest is. Tumblr user cartoon has my favorite explanation of what a special interest is that i’ve seen to date:

“To have a deep, intense, passionate and incredibly focused / narrowed interest in a certain area of study, subject, topic or thing - to the exclusion of other interests. This interest is something that exists for the long-term, most often lasting for multiple months, years, or even you’re entire life “

L says that he only does detective work because it’s a hobby, and he finds it entertaining. We’ve also seen that he’s been at it for quite some time--if you take side content (the wammy’s house comic, LABB) seriously, then he’s been at it since childhood, with unwavering interest. it definitely comes across to me as L having a special interest in detective work, rather than it just being a normal hobby or a job for him, especially since he says it isn’t out of any moral obligation.

germaphobia

Germaphobia is very common for individuals with autism. a lot of the time it’s actually sensory issues associated with “dirty” things, and a lot of the time it’s because features of OCD are heavily comorbid with autism, including contamination OCD and such fears. regardless of the reason, though, L’s aversion to touching Bad Things is a very autistic behavior, and so is his resulting quirk that he tends to hold things in a very odd manner!

muted emotional expression

this is getting more into L’s character, but L tends to feel and express emotions in a very muted way. not to say he doesn’t have them, but for instance in the example above, L doesn’t have a solid grasp on what exactly he’s feeling. he thinks he might be acting irrationally and overemotionally because he logically should be afraid, but he isn’t sure, and none of these emotions present themselves visibly.

i’ve also seen it said that Ukita’s death is another good example of his muted response to emotion--he tells Aizawa to stay rational and his voice doesn’t waver as he tells him as much, but he holds himself tightly. for someone with poor emotional competence, these physical signs of distress can be hard to read in oneself, but Aizawa (a man who is extremely in-tune with his emotions) can tell immediately.

high logic, low empathy

L is also a character who, like many autistic people, lacks a certain degree of empathy. it’s not that he doesn’t have any, but it’s limited enough--and he values logic over it enough--that he’s willing to make extreme decisions and take a “ends justify the means” approach (such as using people as bait.) in the example above, L takes a moment to work through what it must actually feel like, which rings as very autistic.

bluntness/not caring about social convention

there are so many examples of this i honestly could list them all day, but L is a character who is very to-the-point and doesn’t care about mincing his words. he can be outright rude to the people around him, especially if he considers them not worth basic courtesy. see: Matsuda.

DRAMAVERSE

if you all knew me you should have known this section is inevitable. i’m not going to talk about every single adaptation because i do not have the time and the only other adaptation that is meaningful in that regard is the movieverse (i am fairly certain that movie L is dyspraxic) but on account of the fact that i don’t care about them i won’t subject you all to them here.

anyway, drama L shows much the same traits as animanga L above (they are, after all, technically the same character) but he displays them in different ways.

he has a much more advanced degree of germaphobia, with Watari saying he’s sensitive to outside air and spraying everyone who enters his space with disinfectant, but not making them wash their hands or anything like that, so we can kind of tell that his issues are more rooted, again, in a fear of germs rather than any actual medical issue. he wants to feel as though he is clean, not necessarily actually be clean. this is very common in contamination OCD, which has a high comorbidity with autism. (my girlfriend has a very good headcanon post about drama L and OCD that isn’t so much analysis than just plain fun, but it’s worth a read!)

he stims, but he has a different array of stims than animanga L--he chews on his jelly pouch bottles,

he tosses it between his hands,

he kicks his feet,

and he bounces in his chair.

he still sits in an unconventional manner. he still samefoods, this time even more exclusively--he only eats Lucky Charge jelly pouches and nutritional bars. Watari onscreen puts his shirts on for him, as well as cooking, cleaning, and mending his clothes for him.

however, there are a few traits that are drama-exclusive that i think really add to an analysis of his autism!

social scripting

social scripting and echolalic scripting are both commonly described as “scripting,” but are very different! echolalic scripting is like echolalia, but echolalic scripting is the recitation of longer passages of dialogue from things the individual has heard before. but social scripting is when you memorize common conversations so you can rattle it off without worrying too much! this can be very handy, such as exchanging basic pleasantries or ordering food, but it can also backfire if someone responds in a way your script’s not set up for. you can find more information on the difference in this video (3).

now, this relates to L in that there are two separate scenes where L says the same thing, rather inappropriately:

L: When I consider Kira’s personality, could it be that the strong-willed daughter is Kira? Or could that sweet-looking son of yours surprise us by proving to be him? You never know what humans are hiding beneath the surface... Soichiro: Enough. L: Sorry. It was just a joke.

-- Episode 2

L: Light-kun. Oh, I’m sorry... If I called you “Yagami-san,” it would be the same as what I call your father. Light: That’s okay. Call me whatever you want. L: Then what about Kira? (silence) L: It's a joke.

-- Episode 4

one could say that L just has a terrible sense of humor--and, of course, having a poor grasp of humor is common with autistic individuals--but the fact that he says nearly the same thing as a defense twice makes me feel as though he has it rehearsed as a defense when people react poorly to things he’s said, which happens often.

mirroring and echolalia

echolalia was briefly covered in the previous example, but for those unaware, via wikipedia (4):

Echolalia is the unsolicited repetition of vocalizations made by another person (when repeated by the same person, it is called palilalia). In its profound form it is automatic and effortless.

mirroring, on the other hand, is explained as such, also via wikipedia (5):

Mirroring is the behavior in which one person unconsciously imitates the gesture, speech pattern, or attitude of another. Mirroring often occurs in social situations, particularly in the company of close friends or family. The concept often affects other individuals' notions about the individual that is exhibiting mirroring behaviors, which can lead to the individual building rapport with others.

both of these are very common in autism, and they’re exemplified while L’s character is established watching his favorite TV show, Owarai Paradise. On one occasion, he’s watching the show and this dialogue happens:

Hiroshi: Despite never telling her how I felt, I still got dumped. I am Hiroshi. Watari: Who was this one again? L: He is Hiroshi. Hiroshi: I am Hiroshi. I am Hiroshi.

-- Episode 2

it’s important to note that in Japanese, “He is Hiroshi” and “I am Hiroshi” are said, at least in this instance, exactly the same, so L is echoing precisely what he’s heard.

On another occasion, L is again watching the show with a glass of wine (seemingly acquired simply to imitate the characters onscreen, as he never drinks it) and when the characters onscreen toast their glasses, L does the same, mirroring them.

CONCLUSION

I linked a post at the very beginning of this analysis talking about how characters are unintentionally autistic coded, and it’s important to understand how this unintentional coding is different from a headcanon--i didn’t make up these traits. they aren’t something that only exist in my head that i ascribe to L for fun.

i made this analysis both because i wanted to share L’s autistic coding in one cohesive place, because plenty of people have made lists before, but none that i could find that included so many examples with images and explanations--and i also made it because of the old ryuzaki persona “theory.”

for those unaware, the ryuzaki persona headcanon suggests that L faked all of these traits in order to make people uncomfortable, to put them off-guard and better mask his identity. i’ve seen posts about people claiming that nobody could actually behave in these ways, that L would surely be unhappy and uncomfortable sitting like that, or eating like that, or engaging in any of these behaviors. I’ve seen some people outright say that L isn’t autistic, but his persona is--that is, he’s pretending to be autistic.

i named this essay “occam’s razor” because, to me, L being autistic is the simplest answer to account for all of these traits. claiming that an autistic coded character is faking it is ableist and it just doesn’t make sense with anything else we know about his character.

but if you want to know more about that, i recommend reading eyecicles’ first!L tag. it’s debunked it in more ways than i ever could.

anyways, in conclusion

#death note #death note drama #death note analysis #L lawliet

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orsuliya · 3 years

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The Rebel Princess Carry Top 8 List

Rebel Princess who?

If you are reading this list, you probably already know everything there is to know about The Rebel Princess. For all the newcomers: I advise you to strap in, watch, enjoy and prepare yourselves for any unreasonable expectations towards prospective male partners that you may acquire in the process.

Carrying of princesses or princess carries

For the purposes of this list we shall define a princess carry as an act in which person A carries person B in their arms, with one arm placed beneath either thighs or knees, the other supporting the back and the body of person B being held close to person A’s chest. Just like a groom carrying his bride, hence the alternative name of a bridal carry.

Furthermore, we shall only accept those attempts in which a defined element of lifting the carried person can be observed. A carry is a carry, a catch is a catch, no matter how delightful such a princess catch happens to be. This automatically disqualifies catches performed by Zitan and Xiao Qi in, respectively, episodes 2. and 4.

Similarly disqualified are all instances of potato sack hefts, such as the one performed by Potato in episode 4. with Xie Wanru playing the role of the sack, as well as any other hefts, lifts or carries where the carried person is not merely supported, but rather fully embraced by arms coming at them from opposite directions.

Attention! Despite the name stating otherwise, the carried person does not, in fact, have to be a princess, thus any titles carried by the carried person will have no influence on the final score.

Why Top 8

Why Top 8, you might ask. Well, there are exactly eight proper princess carries in the whole 68-episode-long drama. Which, by the way, gives us one princess carry every eight and a half episodes or 0.12 of a princess carry per single episode.

Scoring criteria

Since the purpose of this list is to objectively estimate the respective value of each princess carry and then use those results to rank all the attempts accordingly, from the feeblest to the most admirable, we are in need of a comprehensive scoring system. After some deliberations the judging panel (namely me) has managed to create exactly such a system, which was then approved by an independent third party (also me, but in a different hat). Each attempt shall receive a score from 0 to 10 points; this score being the sum of four components: Style, Technique, Hotness and Excellence. Those four main components encompass partial, specific criteria; see the explanation below.

Style: This particular component is mostly used to give proper value to such vital characteristics as artistry and flair. However, those are not by any means the only considerations the judging panel will take into account while awarding the total score. The intention behind any given attempt is to be established and subsequently used to judge how well the chosen style suits the purpose of the carry in question and whether it adequately fulfills any goals and needs that may have been expressed or set before the commencement of the attempt itself. The judging panel reserves the right to make demerits based on handling of clothing and accessories, as needed.

Technique: While proper technique of executing a princess carry is most important and ought to be assessed with exceptional care, it is far from the only criteria taken into account while rating general technique of any one attempt. After all, lifting a person in one thing and actually carrying them a very different one. Thus, whenever possible, we will observe and judge the endurance exhibited during the attempt in question; if such an observation proves to be impossible for any reason, a reasonable estimation may serve as an acceptable substitute. Moreover, since any princess carry has to be judged on its merits, the overall difficulty of any attempt must be first established, depending on the probable disparity between the strength of the carrier and the weight of the carried person as well as other factors, such as any floppiness or lack of a proper latch on the neck of the carrier.

Hotness: Recognizing that overall hotness is not a criteria that can be judged objectively, the judging panel hereby undertakes to use more precise methods of measurement, such as: reaction of any independent witnesses, if any are present, emotional reaction of the carrier, the carried person or both, whichever applies and the general mood set by any particular attempt. If any of the aforementioned methods cannot be used for any reason, the judging panel reserves the right to supplement this component with individual hotness assessments made by qualified experts (also me, but horny).

Excellence: Any exceptional elements or unique characteristics, which the judging panel feels might not have been rewarded properly while scoring the other components, will be subject to a rather subjective criteria of overall excellence.

The individual components can receive the following maximum point values:

Style: 3 points

Technique: 3 points

Hotness: 3 points

Excellence: 1 point

AND NOW TO THE LIST PROPER!

Number 8. Song Huaien gets recruited to escort a rather shaken Yuxiu to a doctor – episode 36.

Style: 0.5 points

What style can we even speak of when one of the parties involved makes no attempt at hiding their utter lack of interest in anything even remotely approaching artistry or feeling? Truly, never has there been a carrier less gracious; that the purpose of this exercise is to escort Yuxiu to a doctor is neither here nor there and serves as no excuse for the decided lack of any flair. After all, technically this is an engagement carry, seeing as Song Huaien announces his intention to make Yuxiu his main wife halfway through its duration. Moreover, he has the easiest possible dress to deal with and still manages to bunch it up, if only a little.

Technique: 2.5 points

A truly great lift it is not, although a more or less correct one, at least if we were speaking of pure utility. Still, Song Huaien manages to position Yuxiu in his arms in one move, no further jostling into place needed. Although this may be helped by the fact that she hooks her own hand around his neck even before he gets her off the ground. What is rather impressive is Song Huaien’s undeniable endurance: he not only manages to carry Yuxiu through two entire courtyards, going up and down the stairs, but also makes it look surprisingly easy. Why, at one point he even breaks into a trot. That Yuxiu is hands down the smallest female to be carried in this drama is another matter; he still does rather well and his posture leaves nothing to be desired throughout the entire carry.

Hotness: 0.4 points

There is much to be said about the utter lack of any emotion from Song Huaien other than pure unwillingness to even exist in this particular time and place. No show of strength or endurance will ever compensate for that. The witnesses do not seem to be overly impressed either; why, Awu cuts off Song Huaien’s declaration of intent and physically hurries him away, while no other person present at the scene pays any attention whatsoever to Huaien’s feat. Sheer competence might have been enough to raise the final score, if not for one thing: Yuxiu holds herself very, very stiff for most of the time, trying to look smaller and not, by any chance, lean into Song Huaien’s chest. It’s only at the very end that she makes a conscious effort to do so and that finally brings the element of positive emotion into play.

Excellence: 0.1 points

We admit that there is something rather special about the sheer awkwardness of this princess carry. It certainly is not easy to forget this heap of stiff, sad mess.

Total score: 3.5 points

Number 7. Potato does his absolute best to show Xie Wanru his love – episode 45.

Style: 1.2 points

There is something to be said for Potato’s (faulty) confidence as well as for his single-minded intent to show Xie Wanru the depth of his care for her and Miracle Fetus. That he doesn’t properly succeed is a different matter altogether. Yet it cannot be denied that there is a certain flair to his approach, if not to the actual execution of the princess carry itself. One also has to question the validity of deciding to princess carry one’s wife while standing at the foot of the bed, although that might simply mean that Potato chose to be surprisingly realistic about his capabilities.

Technique: 1 point

The fact that Potato even manages to lift Xie Wanru, much less to a proper princess carry height, is a rather impressive feat, particularly taking into account that he is, well, Potato and Xie Wanru is no sylphid. Moreover, he really does rather well on the upswing, applying a reasonable amount of force, certainly enough to get her to the required, if not particularly awe-inspiring level. What is surprising is that - when the scene is rewatched closely - it does seem like he actually manages to lock his grip and stop Wanru on the downswing, if only for a moment. What does get him is her fearful reaction; and even then he does manage to let her down in a controlled manner. Sadly, Potato’s attempt should be properly classified as a princess lift rather than a princess carry, since there is no actual carrying going on; this makes it hard to estimate his endurance.

Hotness: 1.4 points

The judging panel would like to notify all sundry that its opinions are meant to be devoid of any personal prejudices and as close to true objectivity as it is even possible. Which means that it must be admitted that there is something rather… warm about the pre- and post-carry playfulness exhibited by both parties, regardless of the momentary fear and panic shown during the latter half of the carry itself. Moreover, the general mood of the scene remains in place in spite of Potato’s incompetence and objective failure. Truly, it is a great pity we cannot see how any of Wanru’s maids might have reacted to Potato’s shenanigans. “It’s a rather lovely moment of marital playfulness,” says our expert, “one perhaps made even more spectacular by Potato’s failure to fulfill his original goal. And really, it does prove once and for all that potatoes should be served warm, not cold!”

Excellence: 0.8 points

It may not be quite fair to award points based on the sheer unexpectedness of ever seeing this particular carry, but there you have it. Objectively speaking, Potato’s sheer excitement and playfulness alone might have managed to win the judging panel over, but the fact that a root vegetable somehow managed to pull off a princess… lift is even more impressive.

Total score: 4.4 points

Number 6. Gatekeeper steps in for Zitan and carries Su Jin’er out of the dungeon – episode 57.

Style: 1.1 points

It is debatable whether there is much flair or artistry to this particular princess carry, despite it being executed in rather dramatic circumstances and in no less dramatic surroundings. However, that is not the purpose of this attempt; what Gatekeeper is actually meant to do is to conduct a rescue, which he certainly does in a rather professional, matter-of-fact manner. There is, however, one element to his behaviour, which may seem rather out of place; notice that he stops before Zitan in such a way that Su Jin’er’s legs actually bump into Prime Minister Wen. As to whether he does it on purpose, well, that certainly seems to be the case.

Technique: 2.9 points

That Gatekeeper is a surprisingly competent man, especially for an Imperial Mook. Not only does he manage to lift an unconscious Su Jin’er from a slumped, almost horizontal position, but he also attempts it while in full mail. What’s more, he does pretty well with arranging her in his arms despite her overall floppiness and then moves around tight spaces with no visible effort. As if that was not enough, he then carries her up a great number of very steep stairs and then, presumably, all the way to the palace proper. Really, the only thing one might find any problems with is Su Jin’er’s relatively low position in Gatekeeper’s arms, especially where her legs are concerned; and even that might be the result of trying to provide more support for her head.

Hotness: 0.6 points

While an unconscious Su Jin’er is unable to express any kind of reaction and even if it was not so, she would most probably act disappointed in the identity of her actual carrier, there is something very reassuring about the matter-of-fact manner in which this particular princess carry is executed. “Competence is something rather attractive, no matter its source,” says our expert, “and there is a certain romantic air about the idea of being literally carried out of danger.”

Excellence: 0.5 points

There is something to be said for a competent substitute, although this rather novel approach to princess carries might be not to everybody’s taste. And yet it spared us from having to watch Zitan making his own attempt, for which the judges are, for one, undeniably grateful.

Total score: 5.1 points

Number 5. Xiao Qi rescues Awu from the evils of excessive alcohol consumption – episode 13.

Style: 2 points

Never has there been a carry more utilitarian in purpose; Xiao Qi makes a decision to get his wife to bed and immediately executes it, no hesitation or half-measures needed nor wanted! And yet even then he cannot deny himself that one tiny show of flair on the upswing. Why, I do believe that at one point Awu’s knees are positioned higher than her head, if only for a moment!

Technique: 3 points

There is much to be admired about Xiao Qi’s technique; he manages to lift Awu up in one fluent move, using the considerable power of that upswing to position her in one go so well that it requires no further corrections. Which raises a question of where and when he might have learned to do that, seeing as it’s the very first attempt we see on-screen (somebody must have brought Awu back from the bridge, don’t you think?). Xiao Qi carries Awu all the way to bed, which may not be a great distance, but still a considerable one. Especially as she is out of it and thus unable to help support her own weight by holding onto his neck or shoulders, although she still tucks her arm in, stopping herself from achieving total floppiness.

Hotness: 1 point

Since Awu is out of it and Xiao Qi’s face is full of determination to get his wife to bed… but for altogether too innocent reasons, there is little that can be said for overall hotness of this scene. The only witness for whose reaction we might have hoped, namely Yuxiu, is also unconscious, which forces us to ask the experts for their opinion. “Somewhat hotter than lukewarm by the sheer force of Xiao Qi’s competence in executing that carry,” said I, nodding with great authority.

Excellence: 0.7 points

The judging panel remains in awe of the exceptional fluidity with which Xiao Qi manoeuvred Awu’s body into his arms.

Total score: 6.7 points

Number 4. Zilu starts celebrating Mi’er’s birthday in a very appropriate manner – episode 22.

Style: 2.4 points

From what little we can observe, Zilu, who is a rather artistic man on any given day, is no less artful when it comes to celebrating his beloved’s birthday. A proper princess carry is just the way to go; still, there remains a question of whether a planned and possibly rehearsed carry is just as good or maybe even better than an improvised one. Zilu’s is certainly planned, judging from the way he arranges himself in the doorway and then carries Mi’er through the entire courtyard, door-to-door. What is admirable is that he miraculously manages to deal with her very difficult dress; perhaps it could have been arranged better, for it does get somewhat bunched up… but it’s a good attempt nonetheless.

Technique: 2.1 points

Sadly, we have been robbed of seeing the actual lift, all thanks to Pang Gui the Inept Ninja. Still, there is much that can be assumed based on the prelude, which we do see, and the carry itself. Zilu’s stretched out hand is undoubtedly very steady, which speaks to his confidence in the subsequent maneuver. The carry itself is rather less steady – Mi’er seems to rest rather low and even sways at one point, although that can be excused since Zilu is climbing the stairs at that very moment. All the same, Mi’er does clutch onto him rather tightly with a fully functional grip. And yes, Zilu does manage to climb a few stairs, which, together with the fact that he carries Mi’er through the entire courtyard, is a surprising feat for a Ma prince. Those, as you know, are not particularly known for their fitness.

Hotness: 2.2 points

It is rather hard to say what Zilu’s two servants might think about his princess carry, even if they do go to their knees. What is quite remarkable, on the other hand, is that Pang Gui stills for a good moment or two, seemingly for no other reason than to observe this great feat. Unfortunately, we do not see Mi’er’s face, although it is obvious from Zilu’s pre- and post-carry reaction that he at least must take great enjoyment from the very idea of surprising his lady in this manner. “There is a tangible promise of great enthusiasm and surprising endurance right in that princess carry,” says our expert, “which raises the temperature quite considerably.”

Excellence: 0.3 points

Not a memorable princess carry by any means; there is a reason why it was missing from the original list of contenders despite the rather unexpected carrier. Still, it is a birthday carry, which certainly makes it one of a kind.

Total score: 7 points

Number 3. Xiao Qi rescues Awu from the evils of lonely garden strolls – episode 18.

Style: 2.7 points

Excellent handling of a rather difficult multi-layered dress on Xiao Qi’s part! Somehow he manages to lift Awu in such a way as to fan out all the layers for maximum aesthetic effect, while at the same time not leaving them to hang so low as to hinder his steps. The overall style is rather sentimental, which suits their surroundings, if not the occasion itself.

Technique: 2.1 points

The lift itself is not quite forceful enough to allow Xiao Qi to arrange his wife correctly on the first try; he does have to jostle her into position. Although this is pretty understandable, seeing as they go straight from an embrace to a full carry with no space to catch momentum in between. Awu is quite a helpful princess on this occasion, holding onto Xiao Qi’s shoulder with a solid, if not overly firm grip and bringing her head close to his chest, which redistributes her bodyweight in a rather helpful manner. The distance to their bed is presumably not that great, taking into account the general layout of the house, but it would still take more than a few steps to get there.

Hotness: 2.6 points

No witnesses to be had, but Awu seems properly impressed during the lift itself. In fact, there might have even been a tiny gasp! Once properly in the air, she shows proper appreciation as well as undeniable trust in the strength of her husband’s arms. Xiao Qi, on the other hand, may look rather restrained to an untrained eye; make no mistake, though, there is undeniable pride there and a not very subtle promise of things to come in form of a smile. “Trust,” says our expert, “is a very warm feeling in proper circumstances” and we concur heartily with this opinion.

Excellence: 0.5 points

There is little else to be said about this particular carry, although there is something truly remarkable about Awu’s helpfulness and utter trust; the judges hold an opinion that a proper carry is just like a tango – meant for two.

Total score: 7.9 points

Number 2. Xiao Qi bridal carries his princess of a bride to their chamber – episode 33.

Style: 3 points

There is masterful handling of clothes and then there are miracles. What Xiao Qi is doing on this occasion can be nothing but the latter; somehow he manages to execute a princess carry while managing his own floor-length ceremonial robes, Awu’s difficult dress with exceedingly long sleeves and a train as well as both of their trailing cloaks. All the while displaying this unwieldy finery to its full magnificence and somehow not landing on his face. Although he noticeably deploys no other dramatic gestures nor tricks except for some very touching and impressively prideful sweet-talk, so it seems like this miracle does require a lot of concentration. But do we really need additional bells and whistles in this case? The judges seem to hold a rather firm opinion on that matter: a bridal carry it is supposed to be and a bridal carry it is, for it really does not get any more bridal, at least not without some reality-shattering shenanigans.

Technique: 2.2 points

Unfortunately, we are again devoid of the opportunity to see the actual lift, which seems like a true pity, taking into account the probable level of difficulty caused by all this wedding finery. Once again Awu is being held rather high, although, to be fair, rather unsteadily – for Xiao Qi, that is, not unsteadily in a particularly dangerous or even visible manner. There is also the matter of her grip; this time Awu locks her hands around Xiao Qi’s neck, which might indicate the need for further support. It is hard to estimate the distance which they might have crossed as we do not know the starting point, but it must have been a rather considerable one and those robes cannot be light.

Hotness: 2.7 points

Having female attendants literally giggle once hit with the aura of overwhelming hotness should be proof enough that this princess carry is truly something special. If it is not, then there is always the look of undisguised manly pride on Xiao Qi’s face, only further affirmed by his words. “Few things can fan the flames quicker than a prime display of manly confidence,” confirms our expert, blushing violently, “as long, of course, as it does not cross over into toxic machoism. In this case we can feel absolutely safe, there is no doubt as to that.” The judging panel, however, decided to award a demerit for a visible lack of surety or excitement on Awu’s face; although caused by external matters, it does seem to retract from the overall mood.

Excellence: 1 point

I am sure that nobody can deny that this particular bridal carry is the most bridal of them all. There is literally no further height to strive for, as far as bridal carries are concerned.

Total score: 8.9 points

AND NOW FOR OUR NUMBER ONE PRINCESS CARRY...

Number 1. Xiao Qi cannot wait to give Awu all the children – episode 29.

Style: 3 points

There is showing off your wife’s beautiful clothes and there is just plain showing off your skills at the former. Xiao Qi shows himself to be the master of both, somehow allowing Awu’s train to hang very close to its full length and yet managing it in such a way that it doesn’t hinder his steps in the least. He also does it while seemingly paying no attention to his own steps, which takes it to a wholly different level, and while at that, he adds a lot of eye-contact and even a heartbreakingly gentle nuzzle. No wonder that towards the end we can observe a quietly triumphant look under all that manly confidence… and no wonder that this particular carry gets its very own rather dramatic music accompaniment.

Technique: 2.4 points

It is rather unfortunate that we were not able to observe the execution of the lift, although there is no doubt that it is was correct at the very least. What we do see, however, is that Awu is being held very high, which indicates an application of considerable force on the upswing, something that Xiao Qi has already proven himself to be more than capable of. At the same time, the difficulty of this particular carry is rather low due to a rather trifling distance as well as Awu helping quite a lot with how she holds her body and with that gentle, yet very solid grip. However, the judging panel is forced to admit that the steadiness of Xiao Qi’s hold is truly a sight to behold; it takes a true master in order to maintain such a minute face-to-face distance without touching and yet avoid any unpleasant bumps.

Hotness: 3 points

Never has there been a carry more deserving of an NC-17 rating. Even without the prelude there is no doubt whatsoever as to the purpose of this particular exercise; the look which Xiao Qi and Awu share speaks just as loudly as five full-blown kisses would have in any other circumstances. And a smouldering look is not the only thing they share: why, at one point they seem to share the same breath, which turns the chemistry up to unimaginable levels. At the same time, this scorching hotness is masterfully tempered by a sense of pure tenderness and intimacy, which causes the judging panel to bitterly regret their promise not to exceed the maximum score for any single component.

Excellence: 1 point

This princess carry really has everything that an ideal princess carry should have, which is undeniably a kind of excellence in itself. However, that is not what convinced the judges to award the highest number of points possible in this category, but rather the fact that more than one expert has pointed out this particular scene as the reason of their own imminent pregnancy, sometimes with twins or even triplets.

Total score: 9.4 points

[all the amazing gifs used in this list were provided by the ever-generous @storge]

#I have finally fulfilled my promise #and created this completely objective list of princess carries #objectivity is my second name #Xiao Qi takes the podium by himself #what a surprisingly surprising surprise #the rebel princess carry list #the rebel princess #monarch industry

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shinjaeha · 4 years

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itsay ep 4 (thoughts + spoilers)

idk even know how to even start this bc i feel like i’m just a big ball of emotions, and this ep was wild. so much happened. last ep was so wonderful and almost languid with how everything played out (esp since it focussed much more specifically on the shift in teh/oh-aew’s relationship). this ep had a bit more of everything, not just the two of them in their bubble anymore. societal forces at play, and hence much more angst. again, this isn’t a proper analysis, it’s just me ranting and raving as usual as i semi-rewatch this again. this is very long, and there are a lot more things i want to think about in more detail at some point bc i’m mostly just skating over a lot of what happened but i gotta get these thoughts in my head out of me somehow. and i’m not sure if what i’m typing will even make sense bc i MYSELF can barely make sense of what i’m feeling but here i go anyway.

so we start off with the both of them kind of awkward after the night before which is fair enough considering what happened. actually when oh-aew’s habit started playing up again, i thought teh wasn’t going to scratch his back bc he was trying not to ~go there again after the night before, but he did and i was pleasantly surprised like oh...maybe things aren’t that bad?? (YET). also, i can imagine that it would have been reassuring for oh-aew too. like things have changed, but it’s not like teh has completely abandoned him. the touch itself is comforting, like when they were kids.

teh’s mum talking about how she wants both of her sons to bring their girlfriends around (and hounding him about bringing tarn around again) is giving me war flashbacks to my own asian relatives and i can feel the way that must crawl under his skin. I HATE when family members do that (and they always do). but for teh it must be esp hard bc he’s already constantly feeling like he’s vying for his mum’s attention over his brother, and now hoon’s bought back a girlfriend so it’s yet ANOTHER thing he feels like he has to compete with his brother over. in the back of his mind, he knows that he can’t give his mum what she wants if he’s with oh-aew (he can’t ‘win’ over hoon bc heteronormativity). teh is def prone to jealousy fairly easily, but i always feel like his emotions on that base level are also very easy to understand. i’ve been in positions like that before where i’ve felt like i’ve constantly been compared to someone else, and it makes you feel like shit. but also oh-aew having to sit through teh’s mum telling him to let her know if teh and tarn are dating?? ouch.

cue teh trying to avoid what’s going on with them and oh-aew being sad :((( they’re both in so much pain and i feel it and thank god i am no longer a teenager that’s all i can say about this.

the guitar in skyline instrumental is just...making me feel some kind of way. they have so many versions of this song and they always use the right version at the right time how is that.

so the tarn scene!!!!!!!!!!!!!! first thought: holy shit she looks so cute i love her crop top where did she get it i want one. second thought: but why did they make her wear a dark bra under such a light top?? i love that i was thinking this and then it all unravelled in front of me and like...the brilliance. the contrast between the scene in ep 2 (i think?) where teh accidentally peeks at her bra through the buttons of her shirt and gets noticeably flustered, and then this one where she literally wears the same bra under a light shirt ON PURPOSE to get his attention, but he doesn’t even notice?? the way she expects him to colour the hibiscus purple, but he colours it red for oh-aew instead?? it’s so incredibly telling of where his heart is at, and how his feelings have changed. anyway, it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that he’s just not all there with her anymore, and tarn isn’t stupid...she’s been picking up on the signals since the beginning (why was he so weirdly obsessed with beating oh-aew at the start? why was he willing to wake up at 4am for oh-aew but not for her? willing to tutor the rest of his friends but not spend time with her?). the way she sees him colouring the hibiscus red and it’s her wake up call, like wtf am i DOING bc of this guy????? i love how she acknowledges that her feelings for teh have made it so she’s solely focussed on him and that she hates the things it makes her do (like wearing the bra to gain his attention). ngl i was slightly worried with how they were going to use her character during these later eps with teh being so conflicted (since girlfriends in BLs are usually handled pretty poorly), but i appreciate that she’s still as fleshed out and full of feeling as she ever was. she’s so sweet, and i just wish she had better than this, but i’m glad she called teh out on it. i know he’s confused af rn, and tbh i don’t think he’s handled this as badly (atm at least) as i thought it could have gone, but at the same time, if he doesn’t decide and set his heart on what he really wants, he’s just going to end up hurting them all. LOVE that she basically tells him to get his shit together first before coming back to her. i like her so much. and that scene of teh just walking around and around at the back feeling conflicted while she drew? really reminds me of the squiggly line timeline(?) of how ep 4 was going to go that nadao released before this ep went live. also cmbyn vibes were real in that one.

the devastation in oh-aew’s voice when he asks teh to at least reply his messages ;;; it’s like teh wants to go back to just being friends and oh-aew has kind of accepted that at this point, but at the same time, teh’s not backing that up. he says he wants to be friends, but he doesn’t know how to act ‘normal’ about it anymore, so he pushes oh-aew away instead. good on oh-aew for not taking that shit and standing up for himself too. i absolutely cannot stand seeing oh-aew sad bc pp’s sad face/voice is so good it actually pains me.

notice how teh ALWAYS uses studies/tutoring as an excuse to get closer to oh-aew again...hmmm...does oh-aew see it for what that is now too? that “you’ve never understood me” hit me like a fucking train. to think that they were so attuned to one another last ep, but now teh’s too caught up in he’s own world to realise just how much he’s hurting oh-aew. thanks, i hate it.

i know that he’s needs to figure himself out more and i absolutely stand by the fact that he needs to do that without messing around with either oh-aew or tarn (and also that he’s using studies again to get into oh-aew’s good books instead of talking through feelings and all that), but the chinese idiom book that he made for oh-aew was actually SO CUTE and romantic. all this stuff he does for oh-aew to show that he clearly cares so much, yet he can never accept it enough to get the words out...

I SWEAR THEY PLAY THE INSTRUMENTAL SKYLINE JUST TO CHOKE ME UP. the darting around each other after the neck kiss COUPLED with the skyline instrumental?? it’s like a sad beach scene 2.0. teh making the first (intimate) move this time. every time he’s trying so hard to convince himself he’s not in love with this boy, and every time he keeps coming back. i always feel such a weird mix of happy and sad when i see them together bc i love them but i know teh in particular, is just not ready yet. like the hug scene made my heart leap, BUT they did it in hiding (under the staircase). all their big intimate scenes are in hiding and that just :(((

teh saying that he loves the seawater on his back bc it holds him up, and oh-aew saying but you have to hold your breath in that posture and it gets uncomfortable so he likes letting it go and just sinking sometimes instead (obv paraphrasing but you get the drift)?? THE WRITING IN THIS. it says so much without telling the audience directly...so poetic. everything about this show is so poetic. the way they sink into the ocean and into that space of oh-aew’s where you can just let yourself go without holding back, and then and only THEN does teh finally kiss oh-aew. and it’s beautiful, after holding back for so long, but it’s also painful bc he’s let go but only within this tiny pocket of space and time. in hiding again. that bird’s eye view shot where you can’t see them at all sealed it for me. like you want to be happy, but you can’t really bc you know that they’ve still got so much more to go...like when teh’s hand grazes oh-aew’s chest and you see oh-aew realise again...like that’s partly what stopped teh the first time in ep 3. when his hands stopped at oh-aew’s chest like it hit in for him that he was a boy. anyway, love that they gave us a skam kiss but i’m also very sad. on another note, how the hell did they hold their breath for that long?????

love that they gave us a further 2 more seconds of teh/oh-aew being cute (CONSTANTLY thinking about teh’s fingers dancing across oh-aew’s face and smushing his face in his hands...oh-aew holding the back of teh’s head...just a brief moment of carefreeness) before they went for the jugular. watching teh fight against himself in this way is what hurts. oh-aew begging him to just let go and accept what they are (the way he keeps going “what did i do wrong?? you feel it too!!”) but he’s so tortured he can’t do it. it’s downright fucking heartbreaking. the “one day i’ll stop feeling this way”...could have just stabbed oh-aew and it would have hurt less. all i know is i’m hurting for the both of them. the repression is real, and it just sucks. this whole thing fucking sucks for both of them (and tarn and bas too at that). idk it just gets me that oh-aew is coming out of this having been rejected once again bc teh isn’t ready yet. and i know this but it doesn’t make me any less upset. not at any of them bc it’s hard i know it’s hard...just at the situation. sometimes it feels like teh’s taking a step forward but then he takes two more back instead. the look on teh’s face when oh-aew was like let’s stop being friends...total devastation. i’m done. don’t want to think about it anymore.

i’m glad that oh-aew’s parents are so supportive of him though. i wasn’t sure how close they were based on their previous interaction but they really love him and i’m glad he has that stability to help him through this.

THE SCENE WITH OH-AEW AND THE BRA FUCKING BLEW ME AWAY. this show is always keeping me guessing, and again yet another thing that i wasn’t expecting but it was so visceral. the red of the bra in comparison to tarn’s bra with the purple hibiscus flowers on it...everything connects. oh-aew looking into the mirror with that bra on and thinking about how things would have been different if only :((( and then his breakdown when he realises that it’s not and that’s the reality of the situation. the feeling that gave me sits so deep within my chest i can’t even begin to carve it out.

teh masturbating when he sees that picture of oh-aew and to that picture of yongjian on his wall (idk why it only now just occurred to me that yongjian is always in red too)?? the self-hatred in this scene. the internalised homophobia. my heart feels so heavy.

he KEEPS reaching and it’s going nowhere bc it won’t ever be enough, and that’s not fair on himself and it’s not fair on tarn. like i understand what he’s going through, and i get that he’s extremely confused and needs the clarification, but when he asks tarn to tell her she loves him and he can’t do the same back for her...i just feel so, so, so fucking bad for tarn.

oh-aew hoping that the worksheets left for him were from teh (which would be very on brand of him), but then seeing bas :( maybe in another world, in another life (like teh and tarn)...but he’s such a sweetheart. bas, best boy ;;;

legit as soon as the gang came to see teh off to bangkok and talk to him about how oh-aew was doing terribly (and wasn’t planning on going to the admission exams) i knew where this was going to go. there’s been so much foreshadowing leading up to this, and this was also one of (if not my main theory) with how things were going to eventually play out. but tbh for some reason i thought it was going to play out later in ep 5...but like damn. damn. the way i understand but at the same time i kept going OH TEH :( throughout this. the utter STRESS this bit put me through. THE MISCOMMUNICATION.

anyway, teh’s love language is clearly acts of service. but it can really be to his detriment when he does things impulsively (albeit with care and good intentions), but he doesn’t use his words so things get lost in translation. sometimes actions just aren’t enough and you really do need words to communicate.

the confirmation scene was so tense...even now i’m just sitting here thinking about it and there’s a hole in my stomach at the thought of what teh must be going through and what he ends up doing. like when that last person on the list shows up and you KNOW it’s going to happen but at the same time it’s like a punch to the chest bc there’s just no doubt that teh’s going to turn it down for oh-aew...OF COURSE he would. oh-aew’s split moment of happiness before realising what teh’s done...the absolute dread i still have in me at the realisation of this.

the tension really kept increasing from here on in...teh coming home and his mum just being so fucking proud of him and telling everyone in the restaurant about how happy she is for him (all while teh is absolutely depleted), then tarn coming in and everything bubbling over when she realises what teh’s done too. realises that teh’s in love with oh-aew (smile is so great in this btw like WOW). the “you hurt me and i’m alright with that, teh, but right now you’re hurting yourself” broke my heart. absolutely love tarn as a character and only ever want the best for her.

when he tells his mum :((((((((((( and his mum just goes on about how hard he’s worked and how much he’s already sacrificed only for him to throw that away. he wanted her to be proud of him SO BAD, wanted to not be compared to his brother for once, only for him to give away his place bc he loves oh-aew more than he wants his mother’s praise. more than he wants to compete and ‘win’ against his brother. when she points to hoon and goes “why can’t you be more like him?” and he just loses it. like rubbing salt in the wound. i’m so glad hoon finally hugged him the way i’ve been wanting to this whole time. the banner congratulating him that teh’s mum made with all his materials from before :((( hoon giving him money for uni :((( you ever watch some things and feel like you’ll never be happy again...

okay the way that everything spiralled during the ig story fight?????? what gets me is that teh sacrificed his place thinking that oh-aew wasn’t going to sit the exam at all (he could have just talked to him and convinced him instead but ughhh i understand i get it). oh-aew thinks he did it bc teh didn’t believe he could get in himself (which of course then spurs him to give it up so he can get in through the exam instead). and when teh sees that, it’s like a smack in the face, like he went through all that only for oh-aew to reject it (him). it’s just layers upon layers of miscommunication and the anxiety of it all absolutely guts me. and then the anger mixing into devastation when he opens his book and sees how it’s all cut up. the remnants a reminder of everything he’s done for oh-aew. this boy that he adores but can’t accept he has feelings for. it’s just this mix of anger and sorrow and what have i fucking done?????? and how could he????? the cast were all fantastic but billkin really had to go above and beyond in this one and i could absolutely feel his pain throughout this.

TO PIGGY BACK ON THIS, like i said before, teh has always used studying/tutoring as a tool to get closer to oh-aew, but seeing that book with all the words gone was in part also him realising he doesn’t have that anymore. he can’t use that tool to get close to oh-aew anymore. the only way forward would be to actually get close to oh-aew without the pretences. and the saddest part of this all is that oh-aew doesn’t even NEED all of that (the tutoring, the book of idioms, the relinquishing of his uni spot)...the only thing he wants is for teh to ADMIT his feelings out loud. to admit that he feels the same way about oh-aew that oh-aew feels about him.

it’s funny bc in the last ep, the conversation that had me feeling the most nervous was when they’re talking at the cape, and oh-aew’s telling teh that he’s a rival and inspiration to him. i always KNEW this was going to come back to haunt them. like a constant circle. friends to rivals to friends to more than friends(?) to rivals. it’s a fine line. narratively, it always had to happen, and now they’re back to competing against one another yet again, and it’s going to be so tough bc they’ll have so much more competition on top of that as well.

next ep is going to be very, very hard on teh, but somehow after this ep, i just feel a lot more hopeful about it? i’m pretty convinced at this point that it won’t end in tragedy (which was the thing that i wanted least of all). of course i want both teh and oh-aew to end up together, but i can understand if they don’t. if this ends with them rekindling their friendship again, that’ll be enough for me. their relationship has been so turbulent and passionate that it needs some stability, and hopefully when teh’s in a better state of mind, when he’s at a place when he’s finally accepted all parts of himself, they’ll get there. so if that means it ends on them running to the cape together (even if they’re not technically together) fulfilling their promise to one another in the sunset, then that’s fine with me. i don’t mind an open ending if it makes sense in the context of the story, and i think something like that would. it’s like after such an angsty episode, you need a slight reprieve from it. i have no doubt in my mind that ep 5 will contain darkness, but i do think that there will be light at the end of the tunnel. so for once i feel truly hopeful about it.

i can’t believe we only have one more ep left to go...

#i told sunset about you #itsay #like there's more angst to come but the real climax of it was in this ep that's how i feel anyway #idk if both of them will get in. i HOPE both of them do.#but i just think that when things get angsty at this point of the story there's always a chance for it to turn around #you just need to worry when things are too happy UNTIL you get to the last ep #tbh though i would like a kiss between them out in the open when teh's finally stopped repressing himself #just so he can show the character growth of his whole arc. so he can be free.#i would obv very much like for them to end up together but there's only one ep left so idk if they can get to that point when there's still #so much that teh has to learn to come to terms with #and he's going to be so so stressed with the exam too (i saw the previews and am bracing myself for more heartbreak as he cries)#i did not mean for this to be as long as it was but i was sporadically writing it as i worked and kept thinking of things to add #and it somehow became an essay #i wrote more in this than i've ever written in any of my uni essays GOD #if you read this whole thing you need some kind of medal or something idk man #also random note but teh's mum's kebaya looks like one that my mum owns #text

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25yearsofcrying · 3 years

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Julie and the Phantoms

Summary: Trying my own hand at JATP novelization, using the show rather than the novel or the scripts. I’m sure it’s been done before but there’s never enough Julie and the Phantoms, right? If nothing else, I have an excuse to rewatch every single scene of the show all over again.

CHAPTER 01: we don’t get older

Luke

This is what I’m talking about! The lights we are under are burning hot, we are half sweat and not one of us can keep a single hair in place but we’ve never sounded better. We’re amazing, playing on a proper stage. Our music and lyrics have never felt more true either.

I feel connected. To the guitar in my hands, to the guys in my band, to the music, to the audience.

Tonight, we’re playing the Orpheum. The energy of the place, or perhaps our own excitement, pushes our performance beyond what we’ve ever done before. Despite the sweat we’re drenched in, I feel I could do this for hours.

We ain't searching for tomorrow (tomorrow) | 'Cause we got all we need today (today) | Living on a feeling that's been running through our veins | We're the revolution that's been singing in the rain

But our song wraps up. We finish to a brief applause from the waitress cleaning tables and a few shouts from the Orpheum’s staff and our crew. Tonight, we are playing a sold out concert at the Orpheum, but that’s in two hours.

Reggie, our bass player, still pulls his mike closer and says: “Thank you! We’re Sunset Curve! Tell your friends!” He winks.

I laugh and shake my head. Bobby, the rhythmic guitar, knocks his elbow against mine before we grab our drinks. “Too bad we’ve wasted that on a sound check,” he says. “That’s the tightest we’ve ever played.”

“Wait until tonight, man,” I assure him as I turn to look over the Orpheum. “When this place gets packed with record execs.” This truly feels like the beginning of something new. It’s like I can feel the energy of everyone who’s ever played here before us and I’m living for it. This place makes legends.

Meanwhile, Reggie the eternal cheerleader, focuses his attention on our drummer. “Alex, you were smoking!” he shouts with a bright grin.

Alex, who’s emerged from behind the drums, looks humble and flustered for a moment. He instantly tries to play the compliment down. “Oh no! I was just warming up. You guys were the ones on fire.”

“Could you accept your awesomeness for once?” Reggie doesn’t give up.

“All right,” Alex agrees, red and shy but obviously pleased with himself. “I was killing it.”

It makes me grin and I rub his shoulders in excitement. Despite his insecurities, Alex really was killing it. As always. He might be one of my closest friends, but he wouldn’t be in the band if he wasn’t good. Trust me. I don’t make compromises when it comes to my music.

My names is Luke. Reggie, Alex and Bobby are my bandmates of several years and together we are Sunset Curve. And tonight, we’re going to prove why we live and breathe for music.

But first things first. “I’m thinking we fuel up before the show,” I say. I don’t know about the guys, but I’m starving. “I’m thinking street dogs.”

While Alex and Reggie answer with a chorus of approval, Bobby turns his attention elsewhere. He gets off the stage and heads straight for the waitress who’s showed her appreciation for our music.

“I’m good,” he tells us over his shoulder and to her, he says: “Vegetarian. I couldn’t hurt an animal.”

I roll my eyes but we are all drawn to the conversation. And the waitress – a very pretty Latina – turns to all of us. “You guys were really good,” she says and I beam at her.

“Thank you.” It’s always a wonderful feeling to see people connect with our music. We write all of it ourselves so up on that stage, people see and hear our souls.

“I see a lot of bands. Been in a few myself,” she continues and that makes her initial compliment all the better. “I was really feeling it.”

“That’s what we do this for. I’m Luke, by the way,” I say and the guys all introduce themselves. Bobby shoves himself in front of me when he says his name and I shove my finger in his ear. What can I say? We are brothers, even if not by blood.

“I’m Rose,” she replies, grinning at us.

She must be a little older than us, but even that doesn’t stop Reggie when his eyes light up as he senses an opportunity to promote the band. “Here is our demo…” He hands her a CD with our logo on it. “And a T-shirt. Size beautiful.” He adds a wink again. An opportunity to promote us and to flirt. Beside him, Alex groans audibly.

“Thanks?” Rose seems unimpressed but she adds: “I’ll have to make sure to not wipe the tables with this one.”

To the surprise of no one, words a little too honest tumble out of Alex’s mouth: “Oh, good call. Whenever they get wet, they just kinda fall apart in your hands.” He is not wrong. Our merch is produced on a budget.

Sensing that my awesomeness, Reggie’s forwardness and Alex’s lack of interest are ruining his game, Bobby turns to us with a pointed glare. “Don’t you guys have to go get your hot dogs?”

“Yeah.” I lean to the waitress with a conspiratorial smirk. “He had a burger for lunch.” I’m not trying to wreck things for him, just tease him a little. I don’t think he stands a chance to begin with, but it’s admirable he is trying.

With good-natured slaps to his shoulder, we leave Bobby to his flirting.

jatp jatp jatp jatp jatp jatp jatp jatp jatp jatp jatp jatp jatp jatp jatp jatp jatp

We leave the Orpheum through a back door and I take a deep breath. “That’s what I’m talking about!”

The last time I felt this level of excitement was before our first ever real gig.

Alex throws me a questioning look: “The smell of Sunset Boulevard?” It makes Reggie snort and I shake my head.

“No. It’s what that girl said in there tonight. About our music, all right?” Her words affected me. Not just because she thought we were good when she’s already seen so many other bands and it would take a lot to stand out in her ears. She felt our music. “It’s like energy. Connects us with people. They can feel us when we play.” I throw my arms around Alex and Reggie both and pull them closer. We’ve always had a connection, ever since we’ve started playing together. “I want that connection with everybody.”

They laugh, but I can see that they get it. Even if Reggie replies: “Then we’re gonna need more T-shirts.”

I can’t remember when Reggie became our dedicated promoter, but it’s a role he takes extremely seriously, which makes me think it must have been his idea in the first place. I am more focused on the music itself, on what it feels like to be on stage and play for a crowd that sings back the lyrics I wrote. And Alex, if we let him, would be perfectly content to play for himself in a garage somewhere, even if he clearly enjoys people loving his performances. Reggie is the one with the business sense. He claims that if we want to play in front of crowds, we need to let people know we exist. It hurts me to think our music on its own is not enough, but perhaps he has a point.

He shoves next few T-shirts into the hands of girls waiting in line for our concert. Their excited reaction and their instant recognition of us makes us all giddy, but I pull my hood over my head. No matter what anyone thinks, I don’t do this to be followed around by fangirls. It’s nice, sure, and one of the perks, but it’s when I am on stage that I want attention. Right now, I just want a street dog.

Though, I can’t help but think that Bobby is missing out by staying behind.

Establishments like Sam n’ Ella’s, which serves hot dogs from the back of a rusted car, are our main source of food these days. Most of our money goes into the equipment, transportation between gigs, creation of demos and merch. Between us, there’s not a single set of supportive parents and so the funds are tight to begin with. One’d think we’d be used to our food options by now, but Alex still frowns. “Man… I can’t wait until we eat someplace where the condiments aren’t served out of the back of an Oldsmobile.” We fill our hot dogs ourselves and he is dripping pickle juice all over the car’s insides as he speaks. He goes to apologize to the owner, but the man dismisses Alex’s fears with a laugh. “No problem, it’ll help with the rust!”

I can’t bring myself to care about the quality of food. My heart is still at the Orpheum. It doesn’t matter that we’re sitting on a questionable couch in the street and eating even more questionable hot dogs. “This is awesome, you guys. We’re playing the Orpheum. I can’t even count how many bands have played here and then ended up being huge. We’re gonna be legends!” I rise my street dog like it’s a toast. “Eat up boys. Cause after tonight, everything changes.” We won’t have to choose between food and paying for merch production anymore.

I take a bite and almost shudder. Any food is good enough for Reggie, so he eats his hot dog with gusto, but Alex pulls a face when he tastes his. “That’s a new flavor?”

“Chill, man. Street dogs haven’t killed us yet.”

Trust Reggie to provide the perfect last words.

#julie and the phantoms #jatp #jatp fic #luke patterson #alex mercer #bobby/trevor wilson #reggie peters #not tagging our queen julie in this chapter because she's not featured in it and I don't want to clog her tag #my jatp novel

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aylinaliens · 4 years

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My Engineer Episode 13: Tent Scene Analysis (and why this conflict is probably for the best)

Okay. So let me start out by saying I loved Ram/King in episode 13. I loved that we FINALLY got to see some conflict and I was glad it had nothing to do with petty drama or jealously: instead the conflict stemmed from King. More specifically his feelings/lack of ability to express them. I think it’s safe to say that King has no problem taking care of Ram. He doesn’t even second guess bringing him home and giving him a place to stay. He pushes away his fear of dogs just because he knew how much they meant to Ram.

No, the conflict that King is struggling with is not related to HIS feelings. It’s related to Ram’s. Throughout episode 13 we saw how Ram seemed to always stick around King. Not only did he stick around but he kept a close eye on him. Every time King nearly tripped or actually did Ram was right there taking care of him. Each time King truly looked guilty and even a bit confused over it. However, it was the scene in the tent that really made whatever annoyance I had for this episode float away (I had some thoughts about Bohn/Duen but that’s for another time) because...damn. They really are subtly trying to show his insecurities. It’s starting to make sense why he never acted on his feelings either and why he honestly...probably won’t? Not in this season at least. It makes sense why he’s pretending to be in denial—I don’t think it’s related to the fact that Ram is a guy but more so because it IS Ram if that makes sense? What started off as a fascination quickly turned into something so much more. Like I said before I think eventually King would let Ram see his vulnerable side but the head injury quickened the pace significantly.

We also have to remember that Ram is not in the best place emotionally right now. This was evident in the few scenes where King accidentally upsets Ram by bringing his father up. Obviously he didn’t mean to do it on purpose but I kind of feel like it was King’s way of unconsciously pushing Ram away. Trying to remind his current state and that HE needs. That while they do have something going on it might not be the best time for either of them.

I ended up rewatching the tent scene multiple times and I noticed a few things.

1) King is always quick to apologize for these little things (like Ram handing him his medicine) because he probably believes that he’s a burden. Actually he states that when Ram asks why he didn’t tell him that the wound got infected. “I don’t want to be a burden to you.” The tone of voice Ram used during this scene was less demanding than the one he used in the waterfall scene. In that scene he was absolutely not taking no for an answer (not when there was a risk King would get hurt again) yet he also sound kind of exhausted. He’s noticing that King is starting to push him away but regardless of that fact he doesn’t understand why he tried to hide this. Still without being prompted he automatically helps King up to take medicine no questions asked. That is something I really liked about this pairing is because they seem to understand each other without words but...

2) It’s clear that King and Ram were not on the same page. Usually they excel at reading each other but King is especially good at it. Right from the start he was able to identify what all these little facial expressions meant. Yet the whole scene where Ram slowly starts to scoot over (very hesitantly and cautiously might I add) really hurts to watch.

What gets me even more is when Ram asks if he was cold and obviously he was yet he still lies. It’s clear as day that he’s in pain in this scene. He actually makes this same exact expression after he pushes Ram away which again, there they go breaking my heart. I don’t even want to talk about the tender way Ram touched his forehead. It reminded me of the bus scene where King kind of moved away in panic except this time he didn’t. That’s most likely why Ram misread the signals imo. He assumed that if King was allowing him to do that than he would be fine with laying next to each other too. They must of slept in the bed (pretty close from the last episode) a few times and even took a shower together so that intimacy was not unusual between them (at least that’s what I assume because it’s kind of implied off screen).

When he opened his eyes he looked so confused and kind of hurt over it. Especially when they stared at each other for a few moments before speaking. He was staring at Ram’s arms for awhile trying to process what was happening. I know the look on his face could be interpreted in many different ways but despite the confusion all I saw was just regret. Regret for this whole entire situation. That’s most likely why he ended up pushing away. He was starting to understand that he was giving Ram this false hope of them being together.

He pushes him away only for Ram to grab his wrist. Everything we saw this season proved that Ram is kind of stubborn (the whole not backing down from a boxing match with Bohn because of Duen) so the only way to get him to listen is to once again remind him of his current state and well to pretend like he was fine.

3) King is way too selfless. He is always putting others in front of him. Ram is no exception. More specifically he realizes that the only way to maintain distance is to bring up their friends. Once again we know how protective he is of his friends and I personally think he’s trying to get Ram to let them in to his personal troubles. Again I don’t think this has to do with the fact that King doesn’t want Ram to lean on him...he’s unsure if he can lean on Ram. So it’s better for both to create some distance with each other and hang out with their respective friends even if (the very next day) we can see just how much they both are watching each other.

4) Micro!! Expressions! Baby!! Micro expressions is a term in psychology that are basically involuntary and voluntary emotional responses that are happening at the same time yet conflict with another. Basically: you are not showing your genuine emotion but sometimes it slips through creating conflict. It usually happens for a split second and while this isn’t the perfect way to describe King during this scene it comes close. For example, the look in his eyes before he closes them is not the face of someone who doesn’t care or who even wants distance. No, he looks sad and before saying they should hang out separately he visibly gulps almost as if it was hard to get out (or that he was nervous). The scene was way too dark so it’s hard to tell if his eyes are glassy but they definitely hold emotion that even I can’t understand. Honestly he just looks sad. Throughout this episode he says one thing but his face tells a completely different story.

Another thing he does that if you don’t look close you’ll miss it: his eyes dart to the other side of the tent. He doesn’t roll over or completely face him but when he’s preparing himself to say that they discreet flicker to Ram to see if he was paying attention (except King never really gets a full look at him which leads me to believe it was more of a unconscious movement). I think it’s also important to mention the fact that he said those things with his eyes closed. Look at the look of pain on his face in that pictures too. It’s not quite as intense as it was earlier but we can see his discomfort. Yeah that could be because he was in legit pain from the head wound but it’s obvious that he doesn’t...want to say this? Or push him away? But he’s unsure how to process or communicate these feelings in a healthy way so he pushes him away.

But what’s even more heartbreaking is that AFTER he did that he opened his eyes. Just look at that face real quick. Does that look like someone who doesn’t care? Ram is not the only one suffering from this temporary break between them. He looks like he regrets what he did but again: the boy does not have the proper emotional intelligence to vocalize this so he tries to let Ram down easy.

4) I didn’t talk that much about Ram but I could honestly do another post just dedicated to him. He isn’t at fault for this situation but King isn’t either. I think if the audience compares them to MekBoss and BohnDuen you will see that while King SHOULD communicate what he did was less harmful in a way? Because it was based somewhat on honesty (both should hang out with their friends because that’s what they came on the trip to do) but that’s not to say he was better than the other characters or that it’s okay to lie. It’s just fascinating to examine all of these pairings because each are at a different level emotionally/physically. The dynamics are way different too. Still this whole episode was structured on lying or withholding the truth and King was definitely pushing Ram away because it’s easier than sitting down and talking it out. I do have to say I’m so happy that while Ram obviously didn’t understand this sudden shift he respected King’s decision. He might of looked at him most of the day but he didn’t approach. Ram might be stubborn and protective but he knows when to step back.

5) We as an audience ended up kind of holding RamKing to this higher standard than the others. For the whole season they were the couple that was off to the side never having drama with each other. We got to see them slowly get to know each other and develop feelings. I know people were upset about this conflict because random drama in the last 2 episodes of shows always equal no good. Especially because there’s a chance Ram and King will not end on a good note in the finale. I hope this isn’t the case though because it would just feel very cheap. That’s to say I’m opposed to them ending up as just friends because honestly? I don’t want them to get together now if we get a s2 because I like that they are slowburn. I just have a problem with them throwing in stuff that was never talked about until episode 14. Having the conflict surrounding King’s insecurities was just *chefs kiss* because it adds to the depth of his character. RamKing has always been the realistic pairing on the show (even if one never speaks and the other has an obsession with plants) so it makes sense for their “drama” to be about that rather than jealously. Miscommunication is no doubt happening here but I hope they address this in the finale. That’s all I’m asking for. Not for Ram and King to make declarations of love but to sit down and be like “hey, here’s how I’m feeling. let’s just stay friends for the time being okay?”

Anyways, I love this show but I’m already preparing myself for the inevitable fact that there is chance the writers might just add in random drama and have yet another pairing NOT COMMUNICATE

#okay i'll shut up #i just...have feelings about this episode #i feel like king is super complex but one of these days i'm gonna sit down and analysis his character as a whole #analyze*#also ram because my heart HURTS for them #this post was way too long too so if you made it this far i'm surprised ahfafjff #my engineer the series #my engineer #ramking #ram/king #ram x king #my engineer ram #my engineer king #lay talay #perth nakhun #mekboss #bohnduen

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sodjehdhdhh · 5 years

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Blind Dating

Here’s some fucking fluff cause y’all so angsty in this fandom. Goddamn, I love y’all but y’all need some fluff, so here you go:

Blind Dating.

How pathetic. Steve never thought he’d ever do such a desperate thing but it wasn’t up to him. Carol set it up and Steve had been practically guilted by his co-worker to participate.

Who sets other people up with their ex anyway!?

Steve didn’t even know the guys full name. He knew it was a Tommy but the last name was H ...something.

Steve groaned into his hands. He was hiding in his car outside the bar he was meant to meet his ‘date’. Trust Carol to pick such a cliche setting. Well, Steve didn’t expect to be staying long; he’d evaluate his date and see if it was even worth his time.

He wasn’t looking for a relationship. Not after breaking up with his last partner of 3 years. After Nancy, Steve doubted he’d ever find someone that got him like she did. Clearly, Steve didn’t get her as well as he’d thought, cause then she won’t have left him for that Byers guy but that was in the past.

Steve slapped himself in the mirror. He needed to stop depressing himself. Maybe Carol was right. He did need to restart his dating life or at least his sex life. He couldn’t rewatch old shows in pajamas while eating ice-cream to replace an actual relationship forever. Pre-Nancy!Steve used to party. Pre-Nancy used to fuck. Like a lot.

He tried to at least fake the confident strut he used to walk with. It worked a bit, he knew everyone in the bar was looking at him but he wasn’t looking at any of them.

To be specific, he was looking for something.

Apparently, Tommy had a pair of shades on due to how ridiculous wearing shades in a bar would look.

Steve spotted the only man in shades in the bar and felt his jaw drop.

Tommy was hot. Like drop down sexy. Steve’s talking ‘broad shoulders, sharp jaw and beautiful blond curls’ hot. He wore a leather jacket, a half buttoned up shirt and ripped jeans making him look like a cliche bad-boy...which was sadly, Steve’s fucking type.

He was flirting with a bunch of other people at the same time but Steve didn’t care. He was getting fucked by that man, come rain, come sunshine.

He went straight up to the blond and tapped him on the shoulder to gain his attention, “You’re my date right? Tommy, right?”

The blond looked at him. Steve couldn’t see what expressions he was giving with the shades. Thankfully, the blond tilted the shades down, just a bit so his bright blue eyes could be seen behind them as the looked Steve up and down, “I’m whatever you want me to be, baby.”

Steve shivered at his deep voice. Fuck it was hot. The way the blue eyes scanned his body made him feel self-conscious. Maybe, High-waisted jeans and a jumper aren’t proper club wear but for fucksake Steve really didn’t expect to stay this long.

“Listen,” Steve pinched his nose, if he was getting laid, he won’t tiptoe over it, “you don’t know me and I don’t know you. I’m just gonna guess we both were forced to do this, or am I the only one?”

“I didn’t even know this would happen but I’m glad it did.”

So Steve was forced and Tommy was tricked...what a great way to start a relationship, “Ugh, fucking Carol,” Steve mumbled before deciding to roll with it, “I’ll be real with you, I’m not really in the mindset for a relationship.”

“Ok...”

“But we could always just fuck.”

Steve was never this forward but he was also never this horny either. It’s not likeTommy had any complaints about it, not with the wolffish grin that spread across his face. Steve soon found himself outside the bar, in some alley, shoved into a wall with a tongue exploring every part of his mouth.

The next day, Steve woke up alone in what was definitely not his bedroom. The only hints of what possibly went down last night was the ache in his bottom and the hickies on his skin.

He groggily looked around. His clothes where everywhere with a mix of other stuff that definitely weren’t his. He forced himself up and ignored how weak his feet fell. Whatever fucked him must’ve been damn good at it.

He managed to find his jeans and underwear . He was relieved to find his phone in the pockets. While he wore his boxers, he checked it. It was no surprise to see hundreds of missed calls and text from Carol.

Chucking he decided to relieve her weary heart and rang her back. She of course answered immediately, “Don’t worry the sex was great.” Steve bragged once the line was answered, “I don’t know why you broke up with him man. For a guy named Tommy, he’s hot as fuck. You’ll be single forever if you ever think you’ll do better than that .”

“Sex? What sex?” Carol sounded shocked as she spoke, “Steve, Tommy called me to cancel. Apparently something came up. But forget that, who were you wi-“

Steve ended the call before Carol could finish .

He couldn’t keep talking as his brain tried to process the information. Did Steve really go up to a random stranger, say they should fuck and actually get fucked by the guy. That was high on the embarrassment scale in Steve’s book and it showed with how red his face got.

“I’d say the jigs up, huh?”, Steve spun on his heel to see ‘Not-Tommy’ leaning casually on his door frame. He had his hands stuffed in his sweatpants and had not an article of clothing on, from the waist up.

Steve should be interrogating him, not drooling at his abs. He managed to snap out of it, “Yeah, it is.” he tried to sound as mad as possible but it was hard when the person your angry at is so hot.

“If it makes you feel better I made coffee. I don’t even like coffee.” He tried to joke but Steve kept his face cold, “not a fan either that’s cool princess, you must have a billion questio-“

“first off, why?” Steve interrupted him.

The man looked at him with a loopsided smirk before chuckling, “Um, why the fuck not? Have you seen yourself?” Steve blushed at the kinda compliment even though he really didn’t want too, “some hot brunette begs me for sex-“ “I didn’t beg!” “-was I supposed going to say no? Why? Cause I’m not named ‘Tommy’? I thought if Tommy was playing so ’hard to find’ might as well swoop in and take the prize.”

Steve groaned internally. He really must’ve looked desperate. He pinched his nose before looking back up, “ok Not-Tommy-” “It’s Billy.” “-what is?”

“My name is Billy, Billy Hargrove,” he explained slowly, “and remember it for next time, it was weird when that one time you screamed ‘Tommy’ when we were fucking but it’s cool cause most times you just called me ‘Daddy’.”

Steve face could not get redder, he buried his face into his hands before dragging them down with a long groan, “oh my goooddd…” Steve was in hell and this was his punishment, “someone kill me.”

“That’s no fun,” Billy chuckled as he came closer to Steve till they were face to face, “your ass is the best fucking thing I’ve ever had and I’ve tried ecstasy once.”

“Let me guess, you’re addicted?” Steve’s voice was sarcastic as he crossed his arms over his chest while staring Billy down.

All that did was entertain the blond, “might be,” Steve gasped when a hand gripped his ass, “it’s a really good ass.”

Steve slapped the hand away before groaning for like the 100th time today, “I slept with not only a stranger but the biggest asshole in the world.”

“Well I won’t say in the world I’m like top 10 at mo-“ Steve stopped the blond from continuing with a finger to the lips.

“Please shut up,” Steve begged, “you’re so good then you open your fucking mouth and I just want to fucking deck you.”

Billy nodded and Steve sighed in relief but his peace didn’t last long, “you’d never beat me in a fight.”

“Oh my god, I swear to…”

—————

“There is no way you met Billy that way!” Robin looked at her best friend with both disbelief and amazement.

Steve nodded as he sipped his drink, “it’s true. I have the text to prove i…” Steve stopped when he heard the door to his apartment open, “...there he is, the love of my life.”

Billy looked at Steve oddly, “I feel like I walked in when people were talking shit about me.”

“We were,” Robin hummed as she dropped her cup on the table, “you’re the biggest asshole in the world.”

“And you’re the biggest moocher,” Billy shot back, “who eats all our food, pays no rent but for some reason is constantly here.”

Robin flipped him off and Steve giggled at the scene. He got up from his place on the couch to kiss Billy on the cheek, “by the way, Tommy stopped by. I still can’t believe you went out of your way to befriend him.”

“He got me laid, I felt like I needed to get him laid cause Billy Hargrove owes nobody othing.”

“Billy Hargrove made Steve Harrington have the most awkward conversation of their life.”

“It was hilarious,” Robin chimed in from the couch, “he kept asking if he wanted something to eat...like in a row.”

It was Steve’s turn to flip Robin off but that only fueled Robin, “Also who wears shades in a bar?”

Billy was flipping her off too.

#a fanfic no one asked for #but i gave it #billy hargrove #steve harrington #robin buckley #harringrove #billy x steve #tommy h stranger things #stranger things #harringrove fanfic #harringrove fluff

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its-called-whiskey · 5 years

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SuperCorp truly IS endgame...

Fam...I’m rewatching certain episodes and I’m getting a serious vibe. Maybe...just maybe, the writers and producers AREN’T out to get us after all?...think about it. What if in their minds, SuperCorp has been endgame all along? Right from the start? It’s not like Lena is a made up character for this show...she exists in the comics and the DC universe. They know her family’s history with the Supers. The way Winn tells Kara in S1 that it will hit her like “wah-pow!”...sure, I’m not knocking that she was nervously chuckling and stuttering when she met James, but there’s such a difference that’s clear as day when she first meets Lena in S2. They instantly connect and relate to one another when Lena says she’s just trying to make a name for herself outside of her family and Kara is quick to agree that she understands as Clark looks at her questioningly for a moment. They’re both out here in the world trying to just be different. Trying to be themselves and not what the world expects of them. The world WOULD expect them to be mortal enemies...the world would expect Kara to completely fangirl and want to BE Clark...the world would expect Lena to go mad like Lex...but they are not their families. They will do exactly what the CW’s motto is and “ Dare To Defy”...

Think about how just as they leave Lena’s office they’re walking and discussing how Clark doesn’t trust her but Kara does and just then Lois calls to check on him and Kara goes on about how Clark is so lucky and how good he is at pulling everything off. He mentions “Jimmy” but Kara has a look about her like she thinks there’s so much more that she’s just realizing about herself and her path in life. She even says, now she has “all these options...” and that she’s just stuck because it’s not easy. Although she’s at a crossroads with her career choice and just coming to terms with the fact that she’s now Supergirl, this statement bears a lot of weight and foreshadowing.

As time progresses, we see just how “easy” things are between her and Lena. Despite the secret looming over them, everything between them has been genuine and raw and real. The most emotion we’ve seen Kara exhibit with ANYONE on the show (aside from Alex...but clearly it’s different). Especially evident now with her tearful confession in s5e1. Honestly I even feel as though Winn thinking she was a lesbian when she was about to reveal her identity to him was foreshadowing. Yes, she did say she’s not gay, but she didn’t rule out bisexual! Not that she would have truly known at that point if she was or not. But it all makes sense. And as much as writers and directors do the whole “queer baiting “ thing, what if...just what if...they weren’t this time? What if instead, they were taking the proper amount of time to truly build up these characters and explore these relationships to give them the attention they deserve and the chance to truly build upon what they need? What if that’s the whole premise of this show? Don’t follow. Don’t do what is expected of you. Be different. Be bold and brave and sure of yourself just like Cat Grant would tell you to do. Dive! “In order to live, we must keep daring. Keep diving.”

#supergirl #supercorp endgame #kara danvers #lena luthor #cat grant #kara zor el #national city #lcorp #supercorp #thecwshows

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badlydrawndrawnings · 4 years

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atwq book four thoughts

guess who somehow got a lot of free time yesterday and made the bold decision to finish reading the last atwq book? me!

guees who feels like they jinxed qwerty’s fate from the previous book of being arrested, but alive, even though i bet daniel handler planned it from the start? still me!

guess who is rather upset netflix accidentally gave a clue/spoiler on the identity of hangfire?

also me.

okay, so first off, to get something out of the way. i love this book. i really do. it had me on suspense every chapter.

theodora figured out qwerty was in vfd (...when did she figure out? not long after sharon reveal herself as a fake vfd member? or during the period she and lemony weren’t speaking to each other?), and god she really was willing to take the blame on being qwerty’s killer. did she think maybe she once again screw up, but this time there was no going back because the screw up got someone killed? after all she seem to selfishly went to break qwerty out for a good evaluation. maybe she thought if things went different, he would still be alive. and given the schism happened, vfd while not divided yet, this is like a sign on how another librarian’s death in the long, long future, will be blame on an innocent party and things go to hell again in the pursuit of justice and truth.

also, ghede and gifford also knew of the coup as well? or at least knew the sbg was doing something and they’re like let them do this shit and we can watch it’s gonna benefit us in the long run’. also, holy shit olaf name drop take two with beatrice herself! i didn’t think while knowing each other young mean they actually hanged out with one another to think they’re possibility friends. this puts the opera night even worse. beatrice must have knew olaf’s parents. with my headcanon of olaf parents being caring parents to olaf and used their connections to get their son back earlier than others, this is just awful.

getting back on track from the mess that is vfd there’s a murder on a train (agatha christie ahoy!). i admit several weeks ago i made the decision to watch snowpiercer and train to busan so i couldn’t really take the murder on the orient express shout out clearly and kept on thinking of the wild willy wonka and the chocolate factory/snow piercer theory. and zombies in south korea.

all the damn sbts kids just thought it great to share the one brain cell to be on the same train (pip and squeak just follow in their taxi; cleo and jake had to travel through time in the dilemma to catch up with them). ornette got her time to shine with her artistic/sculpting skills and there’s some light on the subject of the lost family (of course it’s a fire that took ornette’s mom life. fires seems to be a way to kill a lot of parents). i was right to call her gung-ho working with lemony, she just agreed to make fake bb statues for moxie and kellar and was like ‘oh shit the two are sharing a brain cell. hangfire could figure something is up what have i done’ and had to make something else to give to lemony. i uh..wonder if seth has a reason to draw her baseball cap all...fuzzy. just a weird question.

kellar’s sister lizzie shows up. i’m going to be honest. she has the bad luck of appearing last and under two disguises that went over my head (she sure fooled me!). i do have some thoughts that surround her and the haines family, but that needs me to re-read the last two books to make sure i’m not imagining something . will say lizzie is much younger and shorter than i thought given her first illustration. i hope maybe a re-read will make me get some new insight on her. also, hi sally murphy. i’m glad lizzie got out with maybe your help (i mean, why else would she want to high tail it out of there).

the identity of qwerty’s killer was something i should have seen coming due to how the mitchum parents are more subdue. i want to slap stew’s parents. they spend all their time bickering they only got their shit together to see how their ‘precious’ son is really a bully and killer and working with the villian under their damn noses. i almost feel sorry for them because shit stew more or less blackmail his parents into covering the crime but at the same time...this call could have been avoid if you pay attention to how your son isn’t the angel you think he is..and you two are still fighting with one another please get your priorities straight i beg you. i admit i almost want to slap stew but i don’t slap kids, and i think if i exist in the snicket world i would get murder first by him.

qwerty’s death and the fact he’s a vfd member just hurt me so bad and i’m still kind of grieving over him. for one, i felt like i should have seen qwerty being part of vfd coming. he’s a sub-librarian. while not a sub-sub-librarian, the fact is qwerty is such so damn helpful to lemony i should have seen he was just doing his best to help lemony because theodora wasn’t honestly...wasn’t doing a good job at a chaperone. but he couldn’t blow away his cover because he wasn’t supposed to interfere in the apprenticeship and honestly he was just happy to be a sub-librarian helping children find what they would love reading.

but qwerty isn’t the only death in this book. i got to copy-paste something from an old atwq post in feburary 8, something i made as a joke, because oh boy, this part is the one negative i have honestly.

he tried to pretend to be her father! i know his voice mimicry is basically akin to juni cortez’s mimicry, but this is just cruel had ellington been there.

about a week later, i made the decision to rewatch netflix asoue. now, the first time i watch season two [edit lmao i actually don’t remember if it was season two i think i hated season two so much i could have blur two and three together i got to rewatch the show again definitely. edit two: okay, i’m certain it was season two i’m 98% certain it was was a pause and read easter egg that’s why i couldn’t remember what season exactly damn easter eggs] i honestly was like ‘so they gave nero a last name. coolio. feint isn’t a surname i was expecting but this is the netflix show this probably isn’t canon to the books’.

on the rewatch, after the austere academy part two ended, i realized something is...off, with nero now. he’s mocking people. and his voice, while not mimicking them, is like...it’s like nero could have inherit mimicry from someone but it never went through. or maybe he did got it but it’s not at its full potential without the proper teaching of someone with the skill...like a father, perhaps?

so the kronk meme is playing in my mind, but it’s the edit of him saying ‘oh no, it’s all coming together’. and given patrick warburton also voice kronk, it felt more like lemony snicket decided to materialize right behind me, be an asshole, and thought it funny to do a commentary on my possible realization hangfire, in the netflix show at least, couldn’t keep his dick in his pants and bore a bastard son in an adulterous affair and ellington has a half brother in the world she doesn’t know about and i hope she never learns about.

(given barrymore feint is just a cameo of barry sonnenfeld, i guess the bullshit gene i talked about in another post regarding a theory who netflix!h is should be renamed the feint gene.)

so reading the third book, and especially this book, i kept a close eye on any mentions to ellington’s dad and hangfire’s behavior. i kept on saying in my mind ‘please don’t be who i think you are’. and bam. armstrong feint is hangfire. i feel like if netflix didn’t have the need to make an atwq reference in nero’s surname, and if i was smart enough to have the book clues smack me in the face (i feel there are clues somewhere, and hangfire dropped all pretenses and just being ‘himself’ in book two was one), i wouldn’t be so angry and upset by this reveal. i more or less got spoil and put the pieces together due to an adaptation, and i should have known better than to do a re-watch while reading atwq. i should have consider the possibility of easter eggs to atwq.

anyway, lemony snicket thought it great to kill hangfire by feeding him to a copy bombinating beast (the tadpoles!!). with ellington right freaking there. with most of his sbts friends there to witness. moxie can’t even look lemony in the eye anymore (no more best friends anymore). everything happened just like that and after finishing the book and taking a walk around the living room, i have to say hangfire is a good villain. he achieved his goal of getting the bombinating beast, even if it’s a copy. he’s a very competent villain who succeed in almost every book in some way or form. he played everyone like a puppet and was a threat that is more akin to tmwabbnh and twwhbnb’s level of villainy. kudos to you hangfire i’m impressed.

hangfire totally got it coming too. however, i do feel...hurt in his death, if only for ellington’s sake. during the walk because i realize ellington reminded me of a character from a different fandom i’m in. there’s some differences that i won’t get into (it’s...complicated for the other fandom), but they’re cut from almost the same cloth: teenage girls with shitty fathers who are using them for their own selfish goals. thoughts for ellington and her future formed faster for me than for the other atwq kids as a result:

post-canon!ellington (a few days later when she finally gets her stuff figure out), has a simple list. 1: avoiding anyone with a vfd tattoo or give shady lemon vibes -ellington split asap after she and kit broke out and have 100% certainly no one is after them, but not before stealing some things from kit, one being notes of vfd volunteers (she thinks). 2: find a new place to live. 3: figure out a new name that isn’t an anagram, because the inhumane society once they heard the news, is probably going to try to get her if they get wind she is hangfire’s daughter and possible ‘successor’. ellington wants nothing to do with the bombinating beast. she never wants to see the statue or anything similar, or hear the words again.

adult!ellington (under a fake name of course), while accepting all that happened, hasn’t forgive lemony snicket. yes, her dad was a villain. yes, she finally understand her dad isn’t the kind naturalist and man, and used her for the biggest ‘what’ event of her life that is also a very selfish goal. many times in the past though, ellington wonders if she missed any signs of her dad’s descend to who he eventually became, or if he hid it very well to where he was wearing two masks all this time, one hiding his true nature. ellington even wonders at one point, dad was going convince her to willingly work with him without the fake kidnapping and had to change his plans to something crueler.

ellington will never know for sure. this is why ellington can’t forgive lemony and will say it to face if they ever meet again. what ellington hates the most out of her father’s death is that she can never tell dad all of her feelings about his wrong doings. she can ask all the questions burning at the back of her mind, or yell her frustrations how terrible a father he is for faking his kidnapping and getting her to do his dirty work, getting her to use her loyalty of family to do things she would never do under normal circumstances. she ask questions and yells at the only photo left of armstrong feint...

and in the end, she knows he’ll never answer, and it hurts to deal with the unknown. adult!ellington doesn’t do the yelling and questioning to the photo as much. partly because she did ‘settle’ on what might be an possible answer, but mostly because the photo is pretty faded to where it’s less ‘armstrong feint’ and more ‘hangfire’. once in awhile though, she slips up like old times.

adult!ellington with her new life (she travels a lot, pays in cash most of the time, and has no set resident; she still love coffee) tends to think of the past, especially when it came to what she had with lemony snicket. did lemony like her? was she just a question in need of solving? ellington admits to possibly liking him, but it was so long ago maybe she just thinks she liked him to have a ‘positive’ memory of the boy she haven’t seen in years that she kind of wants to see again, if only to yell at him for robbing her of something important. his name lands on her radar a lot, twice from the daily punctilio. the first one was learning of lemony snicket’s crimes, and it was an accident.

the second time, she learn of his death, though she read the daily punctilio on purpose in hopes of a name drop. adult!ellington ended up finding some children’s book, and made the mistake of going to the back of it and find a photo of lemony snicket. not really though. lemony is hiding his face (ellington hates it) and she buys it to know what it’s about. it spiral to where she bought the next two books because she wants to know if the baudelaires orphans are real (and because lemony doesn’t seem the same anymore from his writings). ellington settles on real when she pulls out kit snicket’s notes she stolen and cross references names, and even travels to the locations to them to make sure. after the third book publication, the series goes on ‘hiatus’ due to the daily punctilio and their announcement. ellington doubts he’s dead, but couldn’t help attend the funeral. ellington is certain lemony snicket is alive, because she convinced she saw him at his own funeral.

#atwq #all the wrong questions #why is this night different from all other nights #ellington feint #hangfire #asoue #a series of unfortunate events #netflix asoue #asoue netflix #lemony snicket #spoilers #this is a text post

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razberryyum · 5 years

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The Untamed/陈情令 Rewatch, Episode 2 (spoilers for everything)

(covers MDZS chaps 6 - 10 and a bit of 13)

WangXian meter: 🐰🐰🐰🐰🐰🐰🐰🐰🐰

(a 🐰 is earned every time there is a WangXian scene or even when they’re just thinking of each other)

I always tell people when I’m trying to get them to watch The Untamed that when they get to this particular scene in the second episode, they’ll know if they will be into the show. To me, this is the game-changer moment: you’re either in or out after this. If this scene doesn’t emotionally move you enough to at least continue on with the drama, nothing else will. It is seriously one of the most romantic scenes I have ever seen captured on screen. This was the moment that made me realize not only was I now fully committed to CQL, but that I had also found a new obsession and was ready to devote myself to Mo Dao Zu Shi. After all, something that can lead to the creation of such a beautiful scene MUST hold other invaluable treasures. So into the MDZS rabbit hole I went, happily diving head first.

Even now I’m still amazed that this scene exists in the intact form that it does. I started The Untamed with little to no expectations, especially knowing the restrictions it was under AND having just finished Guardian and experiencing how poor creative decisions can arise due to censorship (or at least, using that as an excuse for their dumb story choices). As I mentioned previously, the first episode was a hard sell since they definitely did not put their best foot forward first, but I liked Xiao Zhan immediately and Wei Wuxian as a character was interesting enough that I wanted to learn more about his past that led to his death and rebirth. The small glimpses we saw of his relationship with Lan Zhan also fascinated me, but then with this second episode, the weak points of the pilot still remained: there was still bad CGI (the statue) and very amateurish technical mistakes (in the recognition scene, at one point, in a close-up shot they’re holding onto each other, but in the next far away backside shot they’re clearly standing apart from each other, only to return to holding each other once again once the camera cuts back to a close-up...whoever the editor is on CQL probably should dunk their head in the toilet every time these editing errors pop up) that made my initial viewing of this episode a frustrating one for most of its runtime. I think I spent most of my initial viewing just distracted, playing on my phone or something, until the big WangXian moment happened and then I was shocked and awed. I know I wasn’t paying close attention that first time because when I rewatched the episode later on, I realized I missed a lot of dialogue and details. I have since revisited this second episode numerous times more, and I do feel bad about how dismissive I was initially. It’s a pretty loaded episode: it has funny, poignant, creepy, mysterious, and cool moments while still feeding us bits of the overarching plot. I definitely have developed an affection for it since my first viewing and it’s become one of my favorite episodes in the series.

Of Pining & other Heart-achy Things

This simple line from Jiang Cheng is enough to make my eyes well up with tears: I can’t help but imagine Lan Zhan traveling around the world for sixteen years, most likely all alone, stopping at different places to play Inquiry, fervently hoping that maybe one day he’ll finally receive an answering chord from Wei Ying, only to be confronted by a deafening silence again and again and again. How utterly sad and disappointed he must have been every time, and yet still, he never gave up and just went to the next location to do the same thing and experience the same heavy disappointment all over again. If that doesn’t make your heart ache, I’m sorry to tell you, your heart is no longer functional.

It’s a detail I don’t remember if the novel covered, but I’m assuming that Lan Zhan was the one to bring Wei Ying’s inventions like the spirit attraction flag and the compass back to Gusu and incorporate them for use in his sect’s normal cultivation practices. I know other people have use his tools as well since that nameless cultivator at the start of the episode was also using the spirit compass, but I feel that with Lan Wangji, he probably purposefully acquired and adapted WWX’s techniques so that every time they’re used, they can serve as a reminder of Wei Ying for him. Though it does make me wonder how Lan Zhan managed to get those approved by his uncle; I can’t imagine Lan Qiren being ok with using anything that was created by the man whom he blames for the corruption of his beloved nephew and model student. Did LWJ just pretend he created them instead? That doesn’t even sound right. Maybe Uncle Lan decided to be merciful and just let Lan Zhan win this one since he was probably obviously miserable after Wei Ying’s death. Yeah, I can buy that scenario, especially since the flag and compass are pretty useful tools.

I wondered did LWJ already suspect “Mo Xuanyu” was Wei Ying before he started playing Wuji on his flute. It’s curious that he happened to be in that part of the forest at that time. I’m guessing his Wei Ying senses were tingled when he heard about Mo Xuanyu’s skills from Sizhui and the boys so that’s why he was hanging around the vicinity just in case MXY reveals his true identity. After waiting 16 years for this reunion, it’s no wonder Lan Zhan had no qualms about holding onto WWX’s wrist in public for much longer than socially appropriate.

I actually get a little emotional every time I rewatch this episode and watch Jin Ling display his mad archery skills because I would always think of how much he takes after his dad. His parents would’ve been so proud to see him all grown up like this; Shijie would’ve been so happy she probably would get teary-eyed as well every time she saw her boy in action. Sure, he’s a spoiled little princess, but he is also a pretty skilled princess with a heart of gold and I just wish they had more time together as a family.

They looked so happy, look at all those smiles. It really makes me so sad that Wei Ying will probably never be able to hug JC like that again, and of course he’ll never be able to hug Shijie period. Great now I want to cry again.

Lan Jingyi Appreciation Section

I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned this precious boy by name so far, so I wanted to take this opportunity to show him some much deserved love. Lan Jingyi with his resting bitch face and steady stream of snark was really the MVP of this episode. He actually made me laugh out loud a few times...in fact, he almost always makes me laugh as soon as he scrunches up his face like he’s smelling something bad. I recently saw someone mention that he’s really the most un-Lan of the Lans (sorry, I forgot who posted that so I apologies for not giving proper credit) and that is really the perfect description of him. I love this kid as much as I love Sizhui and Jin Ling, and I am also sincerely fascinated by him. I mean, who raised him in the Gusu Lan sect? Cuz I cannot imagine Lan Qiren being the one since Jingyi undoubtedly would’ve had all his snark driven out of him at an early age. Hell, the amount of disciplinary action he probably had to have gone through would’ve probably killed him at a young age. Did he join the sect when he was already fully formed so that’s why he’s still breaking Lan sect rules right and left? He threatened an old man and is like rude to everyone. I don’t know all 3000 rules but I’m pretty sure being mean to the elderly and insulting to supposedly mentally unstable people are probably not allowed. If anything, his disposition would make him more suitable for the Lanling Jin sect and yet he’s with the stuffy Lans. WHY? I could watch a whole spin-off series with just him and the other juniors as long as we get to learn about how he came to be with the Gusu Lan sect. He’s hilarious and adorable, and among the many the reasons why I wish we had more episodes for the present-day arc, one of them is because I wanted to spend more time with the juniors, especially Lan Jingyi, even if it meant the screenwriters would’ve had to go off book and create new scenes for them. It would’ve been well worth it to hear LJY throw more shade at people.

Random Bits of Randomness

It’s kinda crazy how WWX just stood there with his back turned, oblivious to Jin Ling’s attack. If Lan Zhan’s blade hadn’t blocked JL’s sword, that would’ve been the end of our main protagonist. I just thought that was such an odd scene...I would’ve felt just a little better if Wei Ying had at least had a little more awareness that an attack was heading for him and made some attempt to get out of the way.

Ugh, that mask. First of all it’s ugly AF, and secondly it’s so freaking ill-fitting it was distracting. Would’ve been nice if the production team gave him a mask that actually fit his face. I mean, did it HAVE to be THAT damn big? I’m amazed they don’t have bts clips of Xiao Zhan tripping and hurting himself because the stupid mask blocked his vision.

Other than being a brilliant mastermind and Oscar-worthy actor, Nie Huaisang has got to be one of the greatest cultivators if not THE greatest cultivator of all time to be able to conjure up an illusion like that. That thing was doing real damage to people. If it was just a phantom, what the heck was holding up those two cultivators in midair like that? And what kicked Jin Ling around? I know Wei Ying was able to drive people crazy with his flute during his Yiling Patriarch phase, but his handiwork still felt more grounded and reasonable than this.

Questions I still have (please feel free to answer them):

- Who was that old man at the grave? Someone NHS paid to just hang around the graves until the juniors and WWX came by?

- So NHS basically fucked up Yan’s entire family and God knows how many other people just to get WWX to eventually play his flute to lure Wen Ning out from wherever he was hiding?

- How did JGY not know Wen Ning escaped? Or did he just leave those details to Xue Yang so he didn’t really care about what happened to Wen Ning? I’m trying if this was addressed in the book but my mind is coming up empty. I don’t think it was brought up in the show though, or I just completely missed it.

Overall Episode Rating: 9 Lil Apples out of 10

#The Untamed #陈情令 #spoilers #Untamed Rewatch #WangXian #Mo Dao Zu Shi #CQL #MDZS #魔道祖师 #Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation #Lan Zhan Lan Wangji #Wei Ying Wei Wuxian #Lan Jingyi #Jin Ling #Nie Huaisang #Jiang Yanli #Jin Zixuan #Jin Guangyao

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ellsey · 5 years

Text

Agents of Shield Rewatch 1x12 Seeds

Ok, I’ve been involved in science for a long time and I’ve never seen so many beautiful scientists in one place c’mon

I’m not saying scientists can’t be buff and modelesque, but as a whole we tend not to be?

Inter-Shield rivalry is hilarious. It’d be even funnier if it didn’t involve Ward.

Fitz and Simmons are so proper here I’m crying at them trying to be so mature

Also I love their superstar status. IT’S WHAT THEY DESERVE.

I do think May is genuinely trying to help Coulson get over this whole Tahiti thing, but I also think she is acting on Fury’s orders to keep him out of it as well

But also Coulson and May need to stop looking at each other like that or just DO IT ALREADY.

Yes I know what happens but that doesn’t mean I can’t try to change the past every time.

Was this the first time we actually heard Fitz’s full first name? I actually don’t remember him being given a first name at all before this. Anyway, Leopold is such an extra first name.

This double podium is super funny to me? That’s a couple’s podium y’all. FOR COUPLES.

Also I appreciate their nerdy jokes. It reminds me of one of my genetics classes where we were reading some newspaper article that called RNA a “DNA-like substance” and someone goes, “Yeah, give or take AN OXYGEN” and we all laughed hysterically and honestly it wasn’t that funny we were just that dorky

I married a genius software engineer so I have never escaped the nerdy jokes.

I just embrace them

And him.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

“He just has trouble communicating with anyone under a 170 IQ” What a mood

I wanted to hear their lecture!!! Boo,

Jemma and Fitz are so cute though working together. If I was in that lecture hall I’d be writing some fic about them SO HARD after seeing them together

I mean I wasn’t there but I’m still writing some so

Ward just wanted to see what scientists do for fun for realsies

“You’ll be jealous wrinkly old hags” hahahaaha don’t talk to your future wife and her bestie like that

The Boiler Room is probably the most accurate thing in this entire episode because when you mix a bunch of scientists together with alcohol and the desire to party shenanigans happen. SHENANIGANS.

The sad thing here is I think that Fitz and Donny really did have a connection. Donny could have found people that he could relate to and actively work with but instead he got involved with a bad crowd.

Man does May know Coulson. So, so well. I love them together.

Coulson was just showing off with Lola c’mon

DAISY WAS THE 0-8-4!!!

Buuuuuuuuuuuuut death also follows her apparently so that’s kind of buzzkill

Donny may be confused but he appreciates real genius when he sees it

“Well, Simmons is probably smarter, technically, but that’s because she likes homework more than life itself.” Mmmmm I have a lot of feelings about this.

I don’t know if I can fit them all on here, but I’ll try.

First things first, what a way to wrap up a lot of things about Fitz’s personality in one simple line. He’s brilliant enough to know that he’s not the smartest at everything. He’s humble enough to understand that it’s ok if he’s not the absolute smartest because he’s the best at what he does. He’s kind enough to give Jemma the recognition when he could just be looking to improve how he looks in front of this cadet. He also respects Jemma enough to give credit where credit is due.

More than that though, he just loves her so much. I mean yeah, Jemma is gorgeous which doesn’t hurt things I’m sure. But if her face got scarred and mangled in a horrible accident, he’d still love her as much because he is so into that brain of hers. He tries to hide it, but he’s not doing a good job.

I just...I love that line.

Also we get some Fitz backstory here. I really feel for him mom in all this because having a truly gifted kid is...exhausting. Trust me.

Oh hey there it’s Ian Quinn again. I should have known something was up when he kept popping up.

Nooooooooooo I hate seeing Daisy tear up over this. It must be so hard to hear.

But Papa Coulson on the other hand is so pure

Yeah if hail that big hits them they are going to be more injured than they were?

I live in a place that gets giant hail so

Why is this storm shapes like a hurricane? I have a lot of weather related questions.

And I’ve never been on a hurricane hunter flight, but I’m pretty sure this isn’t how it works.

But May is awesome so whatever

RIP rando science bad guy

Jemma wants a pillow for dead guy’s head. I appreciate her attention to detail.

Donny’s kind of jerk actually

Let Fitz comfort you

Coulson doesn’t want to talk about May’s sex life hehehe

I love Coulson’s little talk about Daisy. It’s so sweet and so true to who she is.

Donny has ice powers now. OF COURSE.

Ian Quinn know the Clairvoyant because OF COURSE HE DOES

Meh

This is a really great episode. It rates 10/10 on the Scientist Shenanigans Scale for sure. It also deserves 10/10 on the Superhero/Villain Origin Stories Scale. SO MUCH BACKGROUND INFO WAS GIVEN.

And for real, what other song could I choose than “Rock You Like a Hurricane” by Scorpions? There could be no other.

youtube

#aosrewatch #aosrewatchs1 #earth vs space #team earth aos #fitzsimmons #jemma simmons #leo fitz #daisy johnson #grant ward #phil coulson #melinda may #a bunch of science nerds #who just want to have a good time #and also destroy thing

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stormbreakers · 4 years

Text

I was tagged by @fierydeans and @angel-e-v-a for this game. Thank you so much, it looks like fun!

RULES: Pick 5 shows, then answer the following questions. Don’t cheat! Tag 10 (or however many) people.

The Expanse

The Witcher

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Watchmen

Suits

Who is your favorite character in 2? Yennefer of Vengerberg. Her backstory is very interesting. And she was an epic powerhouse I could root for.

Who is your least favorite character in 1? Sadavir Errinwright. I don’t really dislike him, but other characters are far more interesting. Although it was fun to watch my queen Chrisjen Avasarala outmaneuver him in every step of the way.

What is your favorite episode of 4? The flashback episode. I think it was episode 6? In any case, I loved it. It is easily one of the best episodes I’ve ever watched. The perfect harmony of a good script, AMAZING cinematography, and acting.

What is your favorite season of 5? Okay, it has been a while since I rewatched Suits (I used to rewatch is a lot) but I want to say season 2? I don’t want to spoil it here in case someone sees this and decides to watch, but it had so many refreshing twists and character moments.

Who is your favorite couple in 3? Jake and Amy. Peraltiago might be my favorite couple from all TV shows I’ve watched.

Who is your favorite couple in 2? Geralt and Yennefer. I enjoyed Geralt and Jaskier scenes slightly more, but I don’t ship them romantically.

What is your favorite episode of 1? Another hard choice. But the one that comes to my mind first is episode 5 of season 2. Just thinking about it gives me goosebumps.

What is your favorite episode of 5? Again, it’s been a while, and I remember “moments” rather than episodes as a whole. So let’s just say the season finale of season 2. It had a rather heated cliffhanger. 😉😅 But seriously, it was a good set up for the next season, if I remember correctly.

What is your favorite season of 2? Season 1. Obviously. 😜

How long have you watched 1? I binge-watched all of it just before season 4 came out. I used to see a lot of posts from my mutuals about to show. For some reason, I had waited until I had nothing (on my list) to watch it. Good thing I did, because it was incredible.

How did you become interested in 3? I accidentally opened an episode of Brooklyn Nine-Nine a few years ago. Can’t remember which episode it was, but it must have grabbed my attention because I remember becoming a fan really quickly. There was a period of time in which I had stopped watching it, but mostly due to my university schedule.

Who is your favorite actor in 4? So hard to choose. Regina King as Angela Abar was great, so were the actors playing her grandfather in different ages. And Jean Smart was just perfect with her timing. Jeremy Irons as Adrian Veidt was great too. Let’s say Regina King, if only because she had more time to shine.

Which do you prefer: 1, 2 or 5? The Expanse.

Which shows have you seen more episodes of: 1 or 3? Brooklyn Nine-Nine.

If you could be anyone from 4, who would you be? Lube Man! 😜 Joking, joking. Probably Angela.

Would a crossover between 3 and 4 work? Maybe in a twisted comedy kind of way? But the tones are too different, I just can’t imagine a proper crossover between the two shows. It is fun to imagine scenes with my favorite characters from both shows though, now that this game put the idea in my mind.

Pair two characters in 1. Who would make an unlikely, but strangely okay couple? Chrisjen and Amos. I don’t know what would happen if those two chaotic beings got together.

Overall, which show has the better storyline? I’m going to say The Expanse, but if only because I enjoyed it more, overall. Objectively speaking, Watchmen might have a better storyline. Depends on what one prefers, probably.

Which has the better theme music: 2 or 4? Watchmen.

Tagging: @rainbow-motors @adorkabledean @nessa007 @obrien-dylan @thesassywallflower @deanwinchesters @shanewests @jensenckles @buckeybarns @daenerys-targaryen and whoever wants to do it!

#tag games #i didn't choose spn because i wanted to try sth different #as always do it only if you want to and haven't done it yet

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arcadianambivalence · 4 years

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World on Fire, Episode 5: Us-Versus-Them

Late May 1940—Early June 1940

Harry’s BEF unit has dwindled down to four exhausted men straggling through the fog. Belgium has fallen to the German invasion. Refugees and soldiers line the roads all the way to the horizon as hundreds, if not thousands, walk to the coast. Stuka screamers swoop down over them in a practice called strafing.

Harry’s unit picks up a lost French girl and her dog and later finds a group of shell-shocked soldiers and two Senegalese soldiers separated from their unit in Ypres. (Yes! Something that includes the colonial forces!) Stan is suspicious that some of the men could be faking their symptoms to hide that they’re German spies or British deserters, but Harry refuses to leave the men behind as the group makes a long and perilous journey to the coast.

Along the way, they stop at a field hospital in hopes that the shell-shocked soldiers could be treated, but the head doctor says the hospital is full to capacity and cannot take everyone. The doctor in question? None other than Webster O’Conner! The interactions between the Parisian characters and the soldiers are brief, but it’s always a delight when characters from different storylines converge.

So, exhausted and still covered in blood from the attack on the road, the soldiers set out again with only a vague order of retreat and a possibly false map on a propaganda flyer to guide them. The German line is pushing in, and anyone left behind will be taken prisoner...from the French soldiers guarding the perimeter to the wounded in the field hospital.

Uwe receives the first letter from the Institute. He yells at his workers for displaying Nazi flags (because they could get “caught in the machines”) and draws the attention of an employee who is a proud member of the Nazi party. He tells Claudia (still at the lake house with Hilde) of the news, and the two resolve to be strong for their daughter, no matter what happens or how they disagree.

Later, the Nazi employee reveals that she knows about Hilde and her hiding place. Enraged, Uwe reacts like I’m sure many parents would want to if their child is threatened. He follows the employee into the factory and strikes her face with an iron. Between the blow of the iron, her fall onto a table, and her final descent to the concrete floor, the employee dies of head trauma.

Now with an even more urgent problem, Uwe turns to Nancy for help, and it turns out Nancy has had some experience with carrying a corpse in the past. Like the backstory of Harry’s father, Nancy’s history is still kept under wraps. Did she report on the Spanish Civil War? Something in America? Maybe the next two episodes will involve an explanation.

Douglas and Robina continue to meet and see Jan. Robina starts to look at Douglas with something more than pleasantness as he bonds with Jan.

(Again, I ask, if their kids are broken up for good, can they get together?)

But this enemies-to-friends-to-they’d-never-admit-to-wanting-to-be-lovers relationship still has its hurdles, particularly how they don’t see eye-to-eye about the war. Then there’s Robina’s lingering prejudices.

ROBINA: I can’t make out if [Jan’s] dourness is a racial characteristic or his personal disposition.

DOUGLAS: I’m not sure the Poles are a race.

ROBINA: Well, they aren’t like us, are they?

(Oh, there’s an us now?)

Across the Channel, Lois is now visibly pregnant and is treated differently for it, something underscored by her conversation with her manager, who suggests that she stand still while performing.

LOIS: Are you saying I wobble, Ted?

A pilot tries to make conversation with her and Connie (suspicion is drawn to his “Canadian” accent) but is rebuffed. Lois makes a wonderful stink face.

Gotta wonder if Stan’s fear of spies is foreshadowing for that guy being a spy.

She later speaks with a pilot, Vernon Hunter, who is immediately drawn to her. He would be part of the RAF’s support of the evacuation, but his “kite” (plane) was damaged and needs repair. The two have tea and meet a few times over the next days.

VERNON: I meet a lot of men who think they’re strong, Lois, but I know strength when I see it. And you have it in abundance.

Polite and observant? A pilot and a gentleman? It’s like Vernon walked out of an old movie—complete with tilted cap and proper accent.

Before he leads his men out and her ENSA troop moves on to their next show, Vernon asks Lois if he can write to her. She gives him her address on an envelope originally from Harry, but she keeps the old letter. She’s starting to let go of Harry, but not entirely. Not yet.

(Let him go, Lois! You’re always so sad when you’re in a scene with him. Be with someone who makes you smile and reminds you that you’re already strong!)

He looks at her like she hung the moon. It’s great. (Possible spy is by the piano).

Tom is one of the sailors delivering soldiers across the English channel.

TOM: How come our ship is called HMS Keith? Keith isn’t the name you give to a fighting ship. All the other ships are called Atlantic, Calcutta, Dreadnought. And we get Keith.

His bitter monologue about the un-inspiring name of the HMS Keith is ironic for a couple of reasons:

1. Because apparently his experiences on the Exeter weren’t enough for him

2. Because the HMS Keith would be sunk on June 1st, so in a bleak sense of luck, Tom could switch ships then.

3. Because once again, Tom is taking part in a historic event and doesn’t treat it as such.

4. Because characters eventually do get on lifeboats for a ship that captures Tom’s imagination, the Calcutta.

After months and months of walking, Grzegorz finally reaches the coast.* But Tom, having no knowledge whatsoever of Grzegorz’s background or the long and horrible journey he has had, refuses him room on the lifeboat because he skipped the queue and German planes are likely to return any minute. The confrontation only escalates from there. Tom points his gun at Grzegorz, who desperately challenges him with “I am not afraid of death.” A soldier pushes Grzegorz into the water with a dismissive, “Go fight for your own country!”

This is one of several scenes that highlight how people can sometimes draw behind national, ethnic, and racial divisions in times of stress, and how others can choose to cross these boundaries. Along with reminding the viewers of the less heroic sides of Dunkirk (there is more than one account of someone trying to get to a boat shot by a person in that boat), it also brings out the differences between Tom, Grzegorz, and Harry.

In a later scene, a soldier starts a fight with Harry’s unit over the Senegalese soldiers because they are part of the French colonial forces (and thus, to him, France’s responsibility to evacuate). Instead of leaving Demba and Ibrahim on the beach, Harry fires his gun into the air and commands that the Senegalese men remain with the group.

But beneath all their dramatic declarations is the fact that all three of them want to live. So when German planes fly over the beach and begin to strafe and bomb the men in the lifeboats and on the beach, everyone runs for cover. Higher up on the beach, Grzegorz is able to duck behind a crate. Tom is without shelter and collapses. It is unclear if he is still living.

Across the English Channel, Douglas senses something is terribly wrong. Already anxious over news of the evacuation (which would have become public knowledge on May 31st, as far as I’ve read), he rushes to Robina’s to see if, as the mother of an officer, she knows more about Harry’s survival, and possibly Tom’s. Concerned with Douglas’s emotional state, Robina refuses him entry in the house.

One thing that caught my attention when I rewatched this episode was how, up until this point, Douglas has generally made certain to call his children “my Tom” and “my Lois” and Robina’s son “your Tom.” In his anxiety, he refers to his son as “our Tom.”

Alone at home, Douglas continues to spiral into a panic attack, trembling, crying, and even having flashbacks of the sounds of distant fire. Lois and Connie eventually find him and try to calm him down, but Douglas refuses to rest without knowing what happened to Tom.

The undercurrent of identity runs throughout the show, from Robina’s referral of Jan as part of a Polish “race” to the sense of class in the Bennett family to Albert’s sense of isolation. You could extend the us-versus-them to the compartmentalization Kasia uses to cope with the murders of soldiers or the way Nancy navigates life as an antifascist reporter representing a neutral America in Nazi Berlin. World on Fire encourages the viewer to examine the contradictions and grey areas.

On one hand, you have Harry.

Harry starts to do more overtly heroic things this episode. He commands the inclusion of the shell shocked soldiers and stranded Senegalese soldiers. He makes sure Stan’s gut wound is checked. More than once, he uses his body as a shield from German planes and attacks.

What if Geoff is a spy? What if staying behind with the shell shocked soldiers seals their doom? But what if he isn’t a spy, and what if the soldiers are all taken to safety? No longer frozen in panic and concern for his men, Harry is spurred to action because of his concern for his men.

And yet, this show does not pass Harry’s choices off as simply heroic and worthy of praise or conversely fall into the ‘goodness-is-stupid’ narrative. It makes certain to show that Harry’s compassion is both an asset and a potential danger to everyone around him.

As Vernon Hunter says, “About the only thing left to believe in. Kindness.”

As Geoff says, “You are kind.”

On the other hand, you have Kasia, who is also driven by compassion, but whose options for resisting and fighting Germans and Nazism are very different. The routine she has with Thomasz of luring soldiers into the ruins in Warsaw and killing them inside.

Kasia tells Thomasz that she cannot remember the faces of the men they’ve killed, and that is how it must be. It’s killing them inside to do this, but they cannot think of another way of avenging the Poles killed in the invasion and in the massacres since then. To make things worse, we as the viewers know the danger ahead. There will be no evacuation or backup for Poland anymore, and certainly no miracles for Kasia and Thomasz.

*For Grzegorz to reach France, he would have had to walk through Germany, the Netherlands, and Belgium. While it is possible that the British forces he met in the previous episode gave him a lift at some point between Konrad’s death and his last appearance in the episode, it still doesn’t answer how Grzegorz was able to cross through Germany. Even if between episodes three and four, Konrad and Grzegorz managed to get on a boat that would take them out of Poland, around Denmark, and finally to the French or Belgian coast, you’d think we’d get some scene of this. It’s even more unlikely when you consider that in the same time, Eddie has made his way from Paris to Dunkirk on foot with likely regular stops for employment. But that’s really the only big stretch of imagination this show has asked of us, so I’ll just have to let it go.

Notes

The newspaper shown in the first scene between Douglas and Robina is dated Tuesday, May 28th. If we’re to use the night scenes, Lois and Connie’s change of clothes, and Tom’s mention of the HMS Keith as a reference, then this episode takes place over four to five days, ending around the date the HMS Keith sank, June 1st.

Eddie playing his trumpet while waiting along the outskirts of Dunkirk is one of my favorite images of this episode:

Resources and Further Reading

https://www.iwm.org.uk/history/what-you-need-to-know-about-the-dunkirk-evacuations

https://www.naval-history.net/xGM-Chrono-10DD-14B-HMS_Keith.htm

http://dunkirk1940.org/index.php?&p=1_187

Photographs

https://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/205194325

https://www.iwm.org.uk/collections/item/object/205194324

#world on fire #world on fire pbs #world on fire bbc #long post

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casual-eumetazoa · 4 years

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mmmmmmmmmmmkay... gotta say Words about the episode, I guess

things I liked:

the show looks good, I’ll give them that - visually/aesthetically very pleasing, the music is amazing (I still miss Gold but I am starting to like this new guy a lot), everything seems modern, expensive, high quality

the theme music is wonderful and the title sequence slaps; love that shit! feels classic and brand new at the same time, and very Doctor Who; probably my favorite title sequence combo of the entire new run

the TARDIS design is gorgeous, like I cannot stress enough how much I love it; again, probably my favorite of the entire new run, and definitely top three of all that were ever made; it feels like a hybrid between Tenth’s TARDIS and Eighth’s TARDIS - bold, creative, beautiful design; on a related note, loved that “fixing the TARDIS” bit; I hope the fam will spend more time inside the TARDIS this season

the actors are giving their best; I feel like C was a huge waste of Stephen Fry, but perhaps it was a deliberate decision (because maybe Mr Fry wanted a cameo but did not have time for more scenes);

Whittaker is good - idk if that was a move on her part or the writers/directors decision, but her Doctor feels calmer, more natural now; she is still quirky and mysterious and herself, but she feels more like a person, you know, and not a bunch of facial expressions and voice inflections thrown together

the companions are good too - Yaz is finally getting attention, and God, Graham and Ryan are like my favorite thing now! their dynamic is just a pleasure to watch; you can make a ‘comedic duo’ compilation just out of this episode alone

the new monsters are definitely my cup of tea; strange, spooky, not full on horror movie scary but still threatening... *chef’s kiss* I loved the twist of them getting through the TARDIS door - that has never happened before, I like that; I like how the Doctor quietly freaks out about it as well, cause she hates not knowing something and hates not being in charge; that scene where she keeps asking the creature and when it finally replies it is just mocking her? good shit right there; wanna see more of these guys for sure

and after some reflection, if you take it in isolation, I do love the final airplane scene; like if I just look at it as a piece of TV/storytelling, I think it is a really good scene; it’s loud, it’s chaotic, yes it is kind of all over the place but it is engaging, and the reveal was out of nowhere and predictable at the same time but I still enjoyed it; and yes it is a stupid cliffhanger but like... it’s Doctor Who! it has always had stupid cliffhangers and I for one respect that decision

things I didn’t like:

oh God... the writing; like I am sorry, okay, but that writing is bad; and it is so confusing to me cause the story overall was good in my opinion - the pace was okay, the events made sense, it has an actual plot, etc - but the writing is still bad? I think the dialogue is the worst by far, but the way the scenes were stitched together is really awkward as well; it feels like it has been written by a talented but severely inexperienced writer who understands more or less how a story is supposed to work but has no idea how to edit

specifically what annoys me is that the dialogue and, to a lesser degree, the sequence of events feels very superficial and forced; it’s not elegant, and it’s not surprising, and it doesn’t feel natural at all; the actors are giving their best but how the hell can you have a good delivery of those lines???

I wanna rewatch it already to give particular examples but the two things that come to mind are C explaining the whole deal with the aliens (telling instead of showing anyone? especially after you’ve already shown it???) and the interview with Lenny Henry’s character (again, telling instead of showing much?); and idk, the dialogue in general is just... eh, it annoys me that I can’t quite put my finger on why it is so bad - but it is so bad, that initially that thing alone made me dislike the episode

and this is double annoying because I know that Chibnall is a good writer and can write excellent dialogue and put scenes together with no problem, and also because, traditionally, Doctor Who has always had great script editors that should have fixed this; like how do you give a dedication to Terrance Dicks and not fix these awkward fucking lines?? I am confusion

things I am unsure about:

the whole spy thing; initially was very excited about it, because I thought we would get a very Third Doctor era thing, but no, that was just a straight up James Bond knock-off; like, don’t get me wrong, Thirteen in a suit gives me life too - but they could, idk, Doctor-fy the whole thing a little bit? throw in some gaffs and alien words and the Doctor going “oh I was a spy so many times”; instead it felt kinda, idk, not integrated enough; like it made sense for the story, but not for the show overall

also I think that the episode had too much action; that car malfunction at the beginning? entirely unnecessary, could have replaced it with a conversation (Thirteen trying to get info out of the driver for example) and get better results; the motorbike chase? looks very cool, also unnecessary and could have been cut to twenty seconds easily; like, come on, this is Doctor Who! I want good dialogue, not Marvel-level action scenes

and now the most controversial thing... the Master; ufff, I have very complex thoughts about this

I’m not gonna lie, I do like that they are back; I think it was too early to bring them back, and it feels like a solely “for the views” decision with little to no creative thought put into it, but damn I love the character; the actor is great too - that being in disguise with no physical disguise bit? love it! like, in retrospect I can see how much he (the Master) must have enjoyed playing the sweet innocent bloke; and that switch in the final scene... that’s some good acting right there

I am kinda conflicted about his style in general, like I would have preferred for him to lean more on the Delgado side of things - more gravitas, calmness, but still with strong chaotic dumbass energy - but I do understand that the Master has to mirror and contrast the Doctor simultaneously, and this sort of more Simm-like delivery (more in the direction of bananas) works better for Thirteen, especially now that she is less awkward and more calm and collected; I like the homage to classics as well, like that tissue compressor thing, that was really good; and yeah the Master is hot again... nice

also the whole “the Doctor is still being secretive about her past” thing is really working for me - I’d love to see the Master slowly destroying whatever image she has built for herself and thus creating enough conflict between her and the fam to go on for the entire season

but having said all that, if we come back to the decision to bring them back... is Chibnall sure about that? because from what we have seen so far, it feels like we have cancelled out everything that Moffat has done with Missy; we’ve had such an amazing character arc with her in Capaldi’s era and now it’s all gone? now we’re back to blowing up planes and killing the Doctor? why?

I am still holding on to hope that this is an earlier, pre-War incarnation of the Master that somehow slipped in to this timestream, but that seems unlikely; another way I could digest that was if the Master has lost their memory and doesn’t remember being Missy, which would make for a nice eventual reveal of the memories coming back to them and him being like “oh shit” - but if Missy’s entire character arc has been retconned, I am definitely not a fan

also, overall, I feel like Chibnall retconned one thing about the Capaldi era that I really loved - he brought Doctor Who from a proper serious drama (as one part of the show, obviously) to all cheesy, goofy, silly sci-fi nonsense; and like, has Doctor Who been cheesy in the past? definitely, and for most of its history, and I won’t complain about that; but this? this feels too cheesy, especially in contrast with Capaldi’s era; like please, Chibbers, can we please see some drama? if you’re going for the whole quality TV show feel, can we also get proper good dialogue and heightened emotion and higher stakes? cause I think you can overdose on ridiculous in Doctor Who

summary:

honestly if the writing - especially the dialogue - was actually good, this would have been a very good episode, an 9 out of 10 at least; but as it stands, those lines are spoiling it a bit too much for me, so I’ll give it a solid 6 out of 10

I know it is a part one of a two-parter so I won’t make any solid and final judgments yet, especially about the Master and the feel of the series overall; all I can say is that, again, if you ignore the dialogue (which I hope is a random fluke and will go away), this sets a benchmark for series 12 higher than series 11; so I am cautiously optimistic about it, and actually excited to see the next episode, but God do I have high standards now, having consumed a lot of Doctor Who media...

and now that I’ve said approximately 563 highly controversial things, feel free to rip me to shreds I guess - or agree with me, who knows

#doctor who #dw s12 #dw spoilers #spyfall #paradox nerd post #text post

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