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#I hope none of my irl friends read this dumb ass post
moiskis · 7 years
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Life update
i thought i might as well make a post cos im way too lazy to tell every mutual so:
The Bad News: my bf broke up with me and school is going kinda shit lol
The Good News: i got a diagnose for depression and My Doc put me on antidepressants last week and i haven't got any side effects yet. Im also gonna start therapy in a couple weeks hopefully aaaand i have a school break next week and im going to a halloween partyyyyy!
(PLEASE DONT REBLOG THIS)
@fennn @egguy @kamelots @hydroogenn
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fandomluver-101 · 4 years
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Sweet Elite Chapter 8
So I have finally finished playing the last chapter! You would think I’d hate playing a game where I’m in school when IRL college is kicking my ass, but to each their own, LOL.
Anyways, I finished playing it and though I found it enjoyable, I’m not all that sure I truly enjoyed it. I normally don’t make my own reviews of the game and just leave comments on ones posted by others, but I decided to post it because why not! 
If you’re interested in a spoiler filled review, just click that “keep reading” below  ↓ ↓ ↓ ↓ ↓ ↓ ↓
First off, I like to write my little fanfics for my enjoyment (I’ve never posted any of them, but I have them in existence via USB lol). I’m probably gonna reference what I’ve written for Tadashi’s arc for comparison, so don’t try looking for them!
When I play Sweet Elite, I also like to record my screen so I can keep track of my choices (and compare what happens to what I wrote). A single playthrough for the first time and this is the longest I’ve spent on a chapter, a whole 2 hours and a half! Not a bad thing of course considering it was a major arc and expected to be on the longer side. But I feel like for the length, I didn’t get much Love Interest interactions because you’re forced to spend fairly equal amount of time with everyone (I played on my Tadashi account first since I had the most AP on that one).
I shall start with things I liked about the chapter, which wasn’t much to be honest?
1 - Tadashi not knowing what the Grammy’s was is hilarious to me (and also kinda sad because that kinda shows how much of a childhood he lacked since the average person would at least know the name!). That whole interaction was nice to see since it showed TadAxel having a non-arguing conversation, but the “Granny’s” was a major highlight.
2 - Neha hinting once again that she might be a scholarship student (because mentioning that scholarship students don’t have to advertise that they’re one is a major thing to introduce and not expect me to run with). And I interpreted how she responded to Karolina supporting Tadashi despite the scandal more of her being a bit jealous because I can only imagine how she’d react if Neha actually is a scholarship student (though Tadashi becoming one himself might soften Karolina up into accepting that your parents’ money doesn’t make you almighty).
3 - Ellie just being Ellie. Lordy she’s adorably terrifying and those are the best short friends to have because they keep you on your toes (and are totally down to hunting for the obscure or raiding Area 451).
4 - Tyler basically being how I felt playing as Scholar because the whole “I’m not doing shit while everyone else is offering something major in their super-awesome ways” was easy to recognize with.
So my first complaint is the convoluted plan to get Tadashi proven innocent/uninvolved in Hiroshi’s yakuza crap. I get the whole lie to the dad to make him think he’s on his side thing since it would get him half of his money back. But what I envisioned in my head and wrote down centered around my Scholar recording the conversation between Tadashi and his dad (which Tadashi did himself, which still makes it a viable plot-point) and them using the script/email from the lawyer and the bank statements of his dad taking all of his money to show him as a victim?
The video idea wasn’t bad and was also something I wrote for my BCP Scholar fanfiction (she’s marketing and PR with her own little company managing social media accounts, so the idea and image control was her main addition to help out). So I don’t know if I’m just being my biased ass self and preferring my solution (release the proof of blackmail, show Tadashi is a victim, have Tegan hack Nakano Corp.’s CCTV/security footage to get timestamps of Tadashi not being present for mafia meetings, have him testify against his father).
None of what was shown in the video could have really proven any sort of innocence to be honest. Tadashi could’ve easily pulled whatever texts and emails he wanted, so unless he showed the one from the lawyer essentially extorting him to testify in his father’s favor, I don’t see how that on its own would have helped with anything. 
Adding the recording to the beginning of the video during editing would have been something to warrant all the positive response to the video. I know the recording is used to try and force Nakahoe Senior into giving Tadashi the rest of his money, but it was also the only logical way to prove Tadashi was without a doubt a victim too (and Tegan could easily get the money back himself or there could have been something about the mom, which I’m gonna talk about later in this post).
IRL, people would point out that Tadashi could easily be lying through his teeth about not being involved. So that’s kind of a plot-hole since getting the public to see Tadashi in a positive light is important to getting the school board to let him stay (which was incredibly dumb to me because are you really gonna tell me there aren’t students at the school with openly corrupt/mafia/mob/gangster parents using dirty money to keep their children in attendance???) (yes, Jack, I’m talking about your ass).
I could understand forcing him to step down as student body president since Arlington has the position kinda Anime styled where the president is the face of the school and has an absurd amount of responsibility and power (as proven by Ellie’s story of the previous president and the fact that Tadashi can veto someone getting academic amnesty). Them removing him from office was something I expected (though my fanfic had him helping pick a replacement for the rest of the year since that’s how it was done at my old private school). But not wanting him to attend school even though his family could easily pay for his tuition was very out there to me. I suppose having someone with a negative reputation could reflect badly on a top school, but I’m pretty sure private schools need justifications to expel someone and expelling them based on their parents actions seems very illegal to me.
But anyways, the super computer plot to hack Nakahoe Senior’s information was also very weird to me. I justified it by telling myself Scholar is in a school of super rich, super intelligent teenagers, so maybe the most simple approach doesn’t come to mind (I know first hand that smart people have a tendency to overlook the simple solutions without meaning to). It makes sense to make their own computer to not be traced overall, but the purpose it was needed for didn’t make much sense in the grand scheme of things (because they didn’t really use the information they found, so what was the point of finding it other than being a hundred percent sure on Hiroshi being corrupt?).
And then while I was playing and listening to my commentary, I again was reminded about how confused I was that calling Hiroshi in jail and keeping him on the line long enough to trace the transaction was necessary? Because I don’t think that’s how that works? If it was to track his location, then maybe, but I don’t think Tegan would need Tadashi to keep Hiroshi on the line to trace a bank transaction or get into Hiroshi’s accounts (but that’s me being nitpicky I think).
Then what they found, IE the gibberish in the calendar descrambling to “Yakuza” was a major asspull while I was playing. I wondered why Nakahoe Senior, AKA the Inglorious Bastard and Chessmaster of the arc, would make it so obvious? Let alone actually put that in his planer... If there was a meeting every Friday evening, I figured introducing this would at least lead to something where Tegan finds a way to prove Tadashi wasn’t present or active even phone call wise because he could get the call logs too. Yeah, the emails are important, but wouldn’t footage or flights be better at proving he wasn’t there?
Then Tadashi’s mother, who was never truly introduced, but teased really. It was set up in a way that my fanfic had Nakahoe Senior threatening to setup Tadashi for the fall if she didn’t convince him to testify in Hiroshi’s favor because Alistair mentions how protective she normally is of Tadashi and even Tadashi says that his mom was frantic over the phone. So I don’t know, I was hoping for something with her since she was brought up.
But my major complaint about the story was that Scholar has little influence on what goes on. At first, I thought there would be options based on your Department and maybe your choices during the Department Competition (you pick your concentration during the presentation). Essentially, I was expecting to be asked to pick a task I would do best in (in this playthrough’s case, I expected to be able to help with PR because for the competition, I picked Sociology which is essential in marketing research).
I also expected something similar for others. Business would get to come up with a marketing and PR scheme, utilizing Axel, Karolina, and Neha. Performing Arts or Fine Arts would get to help edit and fine tune the video or make a smear campagne against Nakahoe Senior with Tyler and Raquel. Pure and Applied would get to code with Tegan or build with Ellie. Health Sciences (or any department because you’re Arlington’s Sweetheart) would get to work with Alistair (who knows Tadashi best) and Claire to make Tadashi’s script and showcase him to the world as a victim (which he really is in this situation).
But that didn’t happen. The only things Scholar really does is buy computer parts and talk to Claire and ask her to help Tadashi (and suggest Tadashi ask Neha for help too). Which was a major asspull because during that section before where the group is talking about who should help him write something from the heart, I was expecting (and super hyped for) Scholar to finally have the chance to be useful. They weren’t, not even for Tadashi’s campaigning since all that they did was talk to a few students (which I know is good for campaigning, but not really helpful in the grand scheme of things) (especially because by default, Scholar isn’t good at these things even if you’re in a department that’s necessary). I got really happy thinking Scholar would do anything that justifies them being involved as “human resources.”
Then being thanked for not really do anything but being the spectator and emotional support friend kinda bothered me. I’m all for that and sometimes you just need that one friend that’s good at being a support unit (AKA the mom). But even though Tadashi says that Scholar was his main inspiration to defy his parents, that’s not really helping him do that? 
How was Scholar instrumental to anything going on? “Waste a couple hours finding pieces for a super computer, something anyone could search for because you can’t code or build things even if you’re in Pure and Applied,” “Go ask Claire to help Tadashi write his speech only for Tadashi to appear and ask her to himself because she would, by default, help anyways and you’re not good at writing a heartfelt speech (which Scholar technically isn’t, but should be if there were more options or at least acknowledged in this situation because why bring up the whole Arlington Sweetheart thing?),” “Get some rest, you deserve it even though you did absolutely nothing beside deliver the computer parts and suggest asking Neha to help.”
To be honest, Scholar may not be as static/pre-determined as most otome games, but Scholar doesn’t have much variety that actually impacts the story. What you’re good and bad at is already determined (like the essay and presentation; you’re automatically not good at it even if you’re Performing Arts or BCP and interested in things that, you know, require being able to give a good presentation).
I would prefer waiting longer to have more meaningful options than getting something quicker and not really being able to do much. Like during the competition where we eavesdrop on people and see the story unfold, that’s what this chapter pretty much was for me.
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So why I made this blog is to cope and rant and stuff
Yeah yeah I’m just a stupid teenager and my problems don’t ever really mean anything, especially when it comes to stupid high school drama, but I do have actual problems.
Here’s my stupid rant or what ever.
Two days ago I lost one of my best friends named Ahrlenny Wendy Hernandez, she was battling leukemia for little under two months, perhaps longer but that was when she was diagnosed, prior to that she had been in the hospital for a month ish due to having liver and gallbladder problems, she even got her gallbladder removed due to having stones. Anyways so she had missed out on a month of school and when she finally came back for little under two weeks, she was feeling extremely poor again. She went to the hospital and they did blood test after blood test after noticing an extremely low white blood cell count.
She called me and some of her our other friends in our chat and told us while crying that there was a massive chance of having leukemia. We reassured her and said it was unlikely and that if she did have it we would help her over come it and help her heal through out the entire process. The next evening, I get a group call in my a group chat with my little gang that included Wendy on snap chat. She is balling now, saying how she has it, Julianna and I once again reassured her that she would make it through this with us by her side over that call, then we told Sophia, Aileen and Raven that night, who then reached out to her to say the same as we did to her. We would help her heal, do cute stuff with her like videos for youtube about makeup and gossip and everything we could for her.
She started chemo, this was about a month and a half ago, maybe less. She was doing fine, the chemo wasn’t even making her sick nor throwup even. She even still had the energy to keep her streaks up the entirety of her poor health. She was texting us in the chat about doctor stuff. We would tell her the latest band drama and she would laugh or sass in a reply to what happened with us. It was simple enjoyable moments I should have paid more attention to.
We were told to tell certain friends in band about her having the leukemia, she didn’t want people to all know about it, whether fear of misjudgment or not wanting pity I’ll never really know. We told everyone we needed the very next school day. The day we told people, Aileen and I told people to make cards and such to give her when we were going to see her in the hospital for the first of two times. We got a white and purple orcid and two stuffed bear animals. But when we called the hospital that day after school she was in surgery for taking bone marrow out of her hip and we(Jacob, Aileen, my mother and I) decided to visit her the next day, though she said she wanted to see us either way. We wanted her to rest and promised it for tomorrow. We got an actualy card instead of some scratch paper, and had all the people who knew sign it to our best ability.
Aileen and I got picked up by my mom and we had the card, the flowers and the bears all with us in tale. We were excited to see her for the first time seeing for in about a week or two. We wanted to tell the tea irl now.
We got to the local hospital, asked for Ahrlenny Hernandez and put Aileen Martinez and Isabella Duncan for our visitors passes, though Aileen was Eileen and Martinez was Maritinez, but my name was spelt correctly haha.
We were then guided to Wendy’s room and go to see her cute, dumb, smiling face. Her Spanish only speaking family was there, her mother was talking to her sister, her Father was watching soccer on the TV and her little brother was as energetic as always. It seemed rather normal for them to be there.
We went over to Wendy gave her our gifts and our card, and one extra bad card that talked about being her plug from some kid in band once she got better, and for wendy to subscribe to his youtube channel. Werid plug but ight.
Anyways, it was pretty chill but Aileen and I were also pretty awkward around her family. We had fun, talked shit about some band kids, talked about what we would do after this all finished. Everything seemed so perfect, so calm, so hopeful.
I then got a text from my mom asking where we were as we had been in there for an hour, and she wanted to go home. We hugged Wendy goodbye for the second to last time ever. And went home. Then we kept texting in our snapchat groupchat, everything was going alright, chemo was doing it’s thing, it was looking up.
Three weeks later Aileen and I planned a sleepover on for February Second, where we planned to visit Wendy the next day and spend as much time as we could with her. We tried to bake cookies for her and her family, but at Aileens, she didn’t have butter, just this butter like spread, and no brown sugar just normal table sugar. We tried to make it work, but the batter cooked to odd for cookie like texture, so we tried to make two cookie loafs, the first one I messed up due to not baking it enough and the second one was pretty good if I do say so myself.
We slept pretty hard that night, and woke up to get our stuff together and go visit Wendy. My mom had work at 11:00am, and would give us a ride at 10:20am- it was 9:00am when she said this but my stupid ass read it as ten-twenty like in ten to twenty minutes. Rushing both of our selves ready we waited and then we realized the the wrong in my reading and waited.
We got to the hospital at about 10:45am, and asked for Ahrlenny Hernandez once again little did we know for the final time. We got to her room which had her(duh), her nurse, her mom, her dad, two aunts, and her little brother. It was p a c k e d. We went over to her, hugged her hello, and sat down near her bedside. She was getting chemo as we entered the room too. She had gotten pale but nothing near to looking deathly, she had lost some weight as well, and was eating a bad of sun chips and drinking water when she was getting the chemo.
I had a bag of mini-marshmallows and proceeded to eat about 4/5ths of the package, it stated to “have fun with your yum” but also to eat one at a time but little to late I was eating them by the handful. It was amusing to us three, even the nurse! So we talked and gabbed about the latest band stuff, like about gigs, fundraisers, drama, gossip and funny stories that she sadly missed. We were laughing and having a lot of fun. I told her about the cookie loaf situation which made her laugh, same thing happened when I explained that whole 10:20am not ten-twenty minutes. It was so fucking wholesome and fun, and I wish I got to savor it more.
At some point her uncle and cousin showed up and barley said hello to her and just started watching soccer which was pretty sad and funny all in one second. Her two aunts when they showed up hugged her and gave her a stuffed animal and food.
As we were talking about all the things we wanted to bring up she even asked us what color wig she should get, purple or blue? She said. Purple always worked great on her.
I started to text our chat to invite them to say hi to Wendy at the hospital but they had work or family problems and couldn’t go, so I texted my friend Gustavo, he was friend with Wendy and in the same band we both played in. We convinced him to come and said he wasnt gonna walk, but said yes. At some point she was supposed to get up and do some walking around the area to keep her self moving and such, but I convinved her to stop at this little side room that had this airhockey machine in it.
Of course she and I played against eachother, and it was a lot of fun, but mid game, in which I was agressivly playing, she stopped cause she had gotten a phone call from her mother, turns out Gustavo had shown up to the room a L o T quicker than we expected and so we walked over to him and brought him to the air hockey room, made jokes and had fun, I still however was playing pretty aggressively and at one point she didnt even have to try and I was pretty much playing against myself. It was pretty funny as I even hit the puck off the air hockey table top a few times like an idiot.
We finally rested a little and then we walked with Wendy around about two or three laps around that part of the hospital. We got back to her room and talked for a little bit more. But my mom was saying I needed to get home to shower and clean my room. So we said our goodbyes and hugged her for our last time ever. Aileen and I where there for nearly seven hours, when we finally left. We got a ride from Aileens mom. And that was the last time I ever got to see Wendy’s smile and hear her laugh for the last time.
We still texted for the following weeks, she told us little over two weeks ago that she was finally let go to go home, but that she would have to go to LA or Sanfransisco for better chemotherapy, She said La as in Long Beach she has family. And we wished her luck like we always did.
About three to four days before her passing, on Friday or Saturday, she sent us an update, her last one. She said she went back to the hospital because she had fainted onto the ground. She got her blood tested and once again she had extremely low white bloodcells. She said that she was sent home and told to eat every 2/3 hours and that she would be fine. We had little communication the day or two before her death. Mostly silence. None of us noticed reall, just thinking she needed time alone or something.
Tuesday morning she passed away, I don’t know if she went painfully or in her sleep. I don’t know if she was home or at the hospital. I don’t know if it was the leukemia, the chemo or if she got sick from her family. I don’t know. All I know is that that day I was talking about raising money for her to my school counselor and for two hours after I got home I was getting notifications from many friends if the rumors were true.
I was in disbelief, no no no! I was thinking it was some sick disgusting joke. I hoped it was. It wasn’t, her cousin posted on his social media wishing a good rest finally after a fight she had with her life.
The next night was spent getting all the photos I could of Wendy, I made about five posts on instagram/snapchat stories and four on instagram that day about her. Who she is and was to me. I also spend that night calling people to inform them of our loss of a musician, a friend, a sister and a family member. I called my old band director even. So many calls, so many texts, so many fucking tears. It took till Wednesday night to know it was real, a gofundme made by her sister to raise for her funeral and rest. Its all real.
She was taken away in the blink of an eye, she fought hard but lost. And I fucking hate that someone like her lost, she’s so fucking strong. I never got to say my last I love you to her. No last goodbye. No last stay safe. Nothing. Everything taken from her, her family and friends all so quickly.
Stupidly enough drama about her death accured after, the day after we had found out, literal hours after we found out, one of my friends posted a story to her instagram stating how she loved Wendy like a sister and how she’ll miss her and someone who hated Wendy proceeded to ask her “did u tho” hours after most of us had found out.
Then today, Thurday the 28th of February, finally a moment of silence was made, no one in my class and in many others did not stop talking during it all. And apparently it felt rushed and disingenuous by the person who had made the announcement about the now passed 15 year old girl.
It’s all fucked. This situation. But fuck man I just wanted one more minute to tell her how lucky I was to have her as my friend. But I didn’t and no one did get that minute.
Goodbye my friend. Stay safe. Please.
P.S. the long instagram discription is one of my poster about her.
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