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onthevirgeofdestruction · 4 years

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Plea for My New Self

Sanders sides Vampire College AU - it’s gay - it’s full of fun fluffy tropes - a bit o’ hurt/comfort - mostly fluff

Words: 4,894 Warnings: Food, Money Issues, blood drinking Characters: Virgil, Roman, Logan, Patton, (Deceit mentioned) Ships: Prinxiety, Analogical, Eventual LAMPD/CALMD Universe: Plea for my New Self Genre: Fluff, Gay nonsense

Chapter 26: Flaws

Chapter 1 for New Readers - ffn mirror

Virgil tapped away at his laptop, writing an English paper. They were all working on homework together in a study room at the library. Logan suggested it, and it seemed like a very nice compromise between spending time together and actually doing their job as students. Virgil had plenty of time to work, but Patton was struggling a bit in psychology, and Roman had fallen back because of all the time he was practicing his parts. They shared the subject and could help each other, which was nice considering Virgil’s psychology schooling was pretty out of date and he couldn’t help much outside of the history portion. It looked like Logan was writing a history paper based on the books he had stacked next to his laptop for references and citations.

The room was on the small side, which made Virgil uncomfortable, but Virgil sat next to the door, and Roman would periodically put his hand on Virgil’s arm or leg and that calmed him down for the most part. Roman was probably just being affectionate, but maybe he caught Virgil’s glances at the doorway. Outside of the size of the room, though, it was very nice to just quietly work together. Virgil had read this story a million times and wasn’t a fan of writing another essay examining themes and symbolism on it. Especially since it was about community-mandated murder. But he could write it with minor effort on his part. It was just annoying.

If Logan and Virgil weren’t writing essays they probably would hold hands or something. Logan seemed to like doing it. Virgil couldn’t understand why a human would want to hold an ice cube, but he wasn’t complaining. Logan explained he didn’t always like contact and it was better to let Logan initiate or offer first. It sort of seemed like he’d be interested right now since sometimes he leaned towards Virgil while flipping through a book. Either way, Virgil was pretty happy. He enjoyed talking to Logan more than anything, so it didn’t bother him too much that Logan needed his space sometimes. Not that he didn’t very much enjoy kissing him. But in general, Patton and Roman were hanging off of Virgil any time Virgil dropped his shield, so he was pretty satisfied with the amount of contact he got these days. Virgil looked up from his laptop and met eyes with Roman. Roman shot a glance between Logan and Virgil and looked curiously back to Virgil. Virgil raised his eyebrow in confusion, trying to figure out what he was trying to communicate.

‘Are you going to tell him or what?’ Roman asked Virgil telepathically, looking pointedly at Logan again.

‘About the vampire thing? I don’t think he’d believe me if I tried. Why bother?’ Virgil thought back with a minuscule shrug.

‘I dunno, it seems dishonest to have him be literally the only person in the room who doesn’t know,’ Roman thought, motioning to the room with his highlighter.

‘If he doesn’t want to know, I won’t force it on him. Some people aren’t comfortable with the supernatural,’ Virgil replied mentally. ‘I at least need to get his opinion on that, first,’ Virgil motioned with his hand to try to express his priorities.

‘What are you guys thinking about?’ Patton thought, looking curiously to the two of them. Virgil hadn’t realized they had looked up from their textbook.

‘I think Virgil should tell Logan,’ Roman thought, eying Logan again and looking critically to Virgil.

‘Tell him he’s a vampire?’ Patton asked mentally, looking a little lost.

‘Yeah. They’re dating. It just doesn’t seem right,’ Roman thought, furrowing his eyebrows.

‘It’s not like you learn everything about somebody as soon as you start dating. It hasn’t been that long. Everybody’s got baggage,’ Virgil rolled his eyes. This was a little extra.

‘No, I think Ro’s right,’ Patton thought, looking concerned.

‘I don’t want to force it on him. He gets a choice on this, too,’ Virgil chided them mentally.

‘I think you’re just trying to avoid something hard,’ Patton looked critically at Virgil, too.

‘No, he’s doing that with you,’ Roman smirked impishly.

‘Roman, you want to come up to the roof with me to see if you bounce?’ Virgil thought warningly and glowered at Roman.

‘What are you avoiding with me, Virge?’ Patton looked at Virgil a little sourly.

‘Yeah, Virge, what are you not telling them?’ Roman leaned forward and smiled roguishly at Virgil.

‘We’re studying, you gobermouch, do we really have to do this now?’ Virgil crossed his arms and tapped impatiently on his jacket. Roman and Patton just stared at Virgil in bafflement for a moment.

‘Did I have a stroke? Was that even English?’ Roman raised his eyebrow.

‘Fine. Patton, I think your job makes it too hard to keep up with school. School is important. If you want to quit the craft store, I’d pay you more than they do. You’re part of my clan and entitled to the resources we have,’ Virgil huffed, looking at Patton imploringly. Patton looked surprised, considerate, and then angry. Well, shit.

“I understand that I am not the best at social cues, but it is odd that you two are glaring at each other with no words exchanged,” Logan pointed out, looking up from his laptop.

“Patton thinks I should tell you I’m a vampire and I want to give Patton money they don’t seem to want,” Virgil said flippantly, waving his hand. Roman looked shocked.

“This vampire joke again? It’s very odd, Patton. If Patton doesn’t want the money, don’t give it to them. I don’t understand why it is these things are being treated so critically,” Logan suggested and looked oddly between Patton and Virgil.

“Thanks, Logan, you’re right. It doesn’t have to be a big deal. I would appreciate it if Patton would consider it, but I don’t like forcing things on people, so I understand if you won’t take it. The best I can do is make the resources available and see if anyone is willing to take them. I will just be honest,” Virgil said, hoping Patton understands his meaning. Patton frowned at him, but they didn’t look angry. ‘Told you,’ He thought to Roman. Roman huffed and rolled his eyes dramatically. Patton looked sad for a moment longer, but smiled and nodded eventually. Virgil felt relieved.

“Okay. Sorry for distracting you, Lo,” Patton apologized quietly.

“We are here together, I’m happy to discuss things with you,” Logan smiled. Patton smiled much brighter after that and looked back down. They went back to studying in silence, but Roman was tapping his fingers on his thighs and watching Logan rather than getting back to studying.

‘You know, I’d love to see how far his disbelief goes,’ Roman thought. Patton looked up from their book in surprise.

‘I’m pretty curious myself,’ Virgil smirked mischievously.

‘Roller coaster,’ Roman thought empathetically. ‘It destroyed me,’

‘Don’t be mean to him,’ Patton chided them.

‘I’m not going to do that. I shouldn't have even done that to you, Ro. I’m just wondering how far he can rationalize things,’ Virgil shrugged, uncrossing his arms.

‘That doesn’t seem in good spirits,’ Patton frowned.

‘Of course it’s friendly, Pat! It’s not even at his expense. Obviously, it’s fine if he knows, so why not just make it a little easier to connect the dots?’ Roman motioned with his head toward Logan.

‘Well, that doesn’t sound bad when you say it like that,’ Patton admitted. ‘Just don’t pick on him,’

‘Why would I want to pick on my boyfriend?’ Virgil rolled his eyes. ‘That’s such a dick move. I like him,’ Virgil pulled a partial frown. ‘I’m just thinking that maybe there’s not much of a point of hiding anything,’ Virgil raised his eyebrows and shrugged.

‘You want to make bets on what makes him question if it’s really a joke or not?’ Roman wiggled his eyebrow temptingly.

‘$500 bucks it’s something drastic. He's pretty logical to a fault,’ Virgil smirked to Roman, who smiled back playfully.

‘This is leaning back into not-in-good-spirits territory,’ Patton frowned. Virgil paused and considered for a moment.

‘Pat’s probably right. Thanks for being my good sense,’ Virgil sighed and shot an appreciative smile to Patton. ‘I still think he’s stubborn, though. I seem to like stubborn people,’ Virgil chuckled quietly and shook his head, trying to focus on writing again.

‘Hey,’ Roman thought somewhat indignantly.

‘You are a little stubborn, Ro,’ Patton looked sheepishly at Roman.

‘Hey,’ Roman crossed his arms.

‘And I love that about you,’ Virgil shot Roman a smile and Roman softened slightly.

‘Fine,’ Roman huffed, not sounding completely satisfied. Virgil would just have to make it up to Roman later. ‘I guess we should get back to work, huh, Pat?’

‘Yeah,’ Patton thought, a little despondently.

‘I’ll get you guys ice cream or something if you can catch up, how about that?’ Virgil offered, trying to lift their moods.

‘Okay!’ Patton beamed at the idea.

‘It’s something to look forward too, I guess,’ Roman frowned slightly, but nodded.

“You want to get ice cream when we’re done, Logan? There’s a gelato place in walking distance with great ratings,” Virgil asked smoothly.

“Are you trying to motivate Patton?” Logan smirked at Virgil.

“That, too,” Virgil smiled back.

“Ice cream is delicious!” Patton pouted.

“Nuh-uh, Patton, this is gelato. This is better,” Roman said, tutting and shaking his finger.

“Why is it better?” Patton asked curiously.

“It’s Italian?” Roman shrugged, not sounding sure himself.

“Gelato is lower in calories, fat content, and has a silkier texture than ice cream. Flavor profiles are subjective, however,” Logan provided.

“Yeah, that,” Roman motioned to Logan. “I’ve heard about it, they also have espresso,” Roman winked to Virgil.

“Oh, I wasn't aware,” Virgil rubbed his hands together in delight.

“I suppose that means Virgil is motivated now, too,” Patton giggled.

“I have written multiple essays on the stupid short story, I needed it. There’s a limited amount of ways to rephrase the stupid symbolism to not plagiarize myself,” Virgil grunted and dourly looked back to his laptop.

“Did you take advanced English in high school?” Logan asked curiously.

“I’ve just already taken this class elsewhere,” Virgil shrugged, shooting a look at Roman. The corner of Roman’s mouth twitched upward.

“The credits would not transfer?” Logan asked, sounding disappointed.

“Nope,” Virgil popped the ‘p’ and Roman snickered slightly.

“I’m sorry to hear about the redundant material. Hopefully, the latter semesters will be more interesting,” Logan said with a small nod.

“Thanks,” Virgil smiled, holding out his hand. Logan took it curiously and Virgil pulled it up to kiss his knuckles. Virgil was rewarded with slowly spreading blush before letting go of his hand and getting back to work. Roman stuck out his tongue just above Virgil’s laptop screen and Virgil chuckled, finding Roman’s leg under the table to hold contact with him. Roman smiled slightly and Virgil got back to work.

—

“Oh my gosh, gelato is so good!” Patton squeaked, excitedly eating another tiny spoonful of their vanilla, cheesecake, and chocolate gelato. They sat on the covered patio outside the gelato shop, taking up the sole table outside. They were alone other than brief passers-by, which was pleasant. The sun was still in the process of setting, so it washed everything with orange-red light. Virgil tried his best to stay hidden in his hoodie and in the awning’s shade.

“The espresso is pretty nice, too,” Virgil smiled, taking another sip. The steam from the espresso fogged up his sunglasses.

“They just pulled that espresso shot, Virgil. Isn’t it too hot to imbibe?” Logan asked, sounding concerned.

“High heat tolerance,” Virgil shrugged. “It doesn’t feel too hot,” Roman snickered and took another bite of his dark chocolate, pistachio, and strawberry gelato. “Aren’t those weird together, Ro?” Virgil asked, looking at the disturbingly green gelato.

“No, it’s good, your tongue is just made for black coffee,” Roman smiled. “How were the gelato bites, Logan?”

“Very satisfactory,” Logan smiled widely.

“Do you have a bit of a sweet tooth you’ve been hiding?” Virgil asked, raising an eyebrow playfully.

“No,” Logan’s ears turned slightly pink.

“Hey, I can’t judge for that. Have you ever seen me have anything but black coffee?” Virgil chuckled and offered in solidarity.

“I- no, actually. No, I haven’t,” Logan sounded surprised. “I worry for your teeth enamel,” Logan laughed slightly, but his lips pulled into a slight frown.

“My enamel is fine,” Virgil smiled widely, not bothering to hide his fangs.

“Yes, your teeth look very healthy. I do not even see coffee staining. Do you have veneers? You have extremely long canines and sharp teeth,” Logan observed Virgil’s fangs.

“I’m going to go with no, since I don’t even know what that is. These are what I was born with,” Virgil chuckled.

“Are his teeth why you call Virgil a vampire, Patton?” Logan asked as he curiously examined Virgil’s fangs. Roman nearly sputtered on his gelato and covered his mouth, giggling wildly.

“Uh, yeah, that’s part of it!” Patton said awkwardly, running their hand through their hair nervously.

“What the other part?” Logan looked to Patton, and Virgil leaned forward, very interested in what Patton had to say.

“His temperature and the whole blood-drinking thing,” Patton shrugged, trying to look nonchalant but was clearly stressed by the situation.

“Coffee bean harvesting practices can be inhumane, but calling it blood is very… extra,” Logan chuckled slightly, looking proud of himself.

“Mmm, blood,” Virgil muttered, taking another drink of espresso. Roman choked on his gelato and Patton patted his back very quickly, looking panicked. “Pat’s talking about the fridge full of blood in my dorm, though,” Virgil looked to make sure Roman was all right, but after a cough or two Roman just looked incredibly bemused, putting his hand on his chest to breathe deeply. Patton sighed in relief.

“Why on earth would you have a refrigerator full of blood, Virgil?” Logan asked incredulously.

“Drinkin’, of course,” Virgil shrugged. Roman chuckled and shook his head disbelievingly, still catching his breath.

“Is this some gothic thing I am not aware of?” Logan asked, still sounding baffled.

“Actually, I think blood bars for goths used to be a thing until they were shut down for obvious health reasons,” Roman offered. “I’ve heard of it anyway,”

“I think those were just a myth perpetuated by the one vampire show,” Patton said, sounding unsure.

“Can you use your roller coaster powers on anything other than just you?” Roman asked curiously, motioning to Virgil.

“No, it’s just me,” Virgil shook his head. “I’d totally make my coffee float if I could. I always wanted to try drinking like an astronaut can in zero gravity,” Virgil leaned forward on his elbow and swished the espresso around in his cup.

“Oh, that would be so cool!” Patton chirped, playfully holding their little gelato spoon up in front of them and eating it as if it was free-floating. Virgil couldn’t help but grin at the adorableness. Even Logan was mesmerized in watching them and turned red when Patton smiled at him.

“What about your gift? You’ve never mentioned what it was before,” Roman asked, turning from watching Patton’s cute display to lean back and look towards Virgil.

“Hm, it’s not that obvious, visually. I wouldn’t do it, anyway,” Virgil said dismissively, flipping his hand slightly.

“If this is an extended joke at my expense, I do not appreciate it,” Logan frowned.

“I wouldn’t make you the butt of a joke, Logan. That would be awful. You’re just opting to stay out of a loop we’re trying to let you in on,” Virgil held out his hand for Logan to take, but Logan shook his head, still looking upset.

“Oh, oh, let's invite Deceit!” Patton blurted out excitedly. “His gift could convince him,” They added with a sly smile.

“I still think Virgil should just do the roller coaster thing,” Roman insisted. “It convinced me right away,”

“Ro, we’re sitting on a gelato shop patio, use your brain for once," Roman huffed an offended breath through his nose. “I’m still not positive if this is something he wants,” Virgil rolled his eyes. Patton pulled out their phone.

“What is something that I may or may not want?” Logan asked, sounding equally upset and intrigued.

“Knowing the actual size of the world around you,” Virgil said, sipping his coffee again.

“The earth is 6.6 sextillion tons,” Logan said resolutely.

“Wow, it is? That’s cool. I can’t really picture that,” Roman said, leaning back and lazily eating his gelato.

“D said he would come to hang out with us!” Patton announced cheerily.

“Really? He never responded when I asked, I was worried he was still mad at me,” Virgil muttered, feeling relieved.

“That’s your other boyfriend, correct?” Logan asked curiously.

“Yeah, he’s so great. If you like sass, sarcasm, and being over-the-top, anyway,” Virgil said dreamily.

“I think he was just interested in annoying you,” Patton said, looking down at their phone with an odd expression.

“That’s completely normal,” Virgil laughed affectionately.

“What about your gift, Pat? You are gelato powered right now, you could probably pull it off,” Roman suggested.

“I can only do it for a few seconds,” Patton muttered nervously, wringing their hands.

“What are you implying Patton can do?” Logan asked, examining Patton curiously.

“Patton can make a shield,” Roman said, motioning to them as if he were a showgirl showcasing a prize.

“If you want to show off, I doubt there’s any harm in it,” Virgil sipped his coffee. Virgil checked the skyline to see how far the sun has set to judge how much time they had before Deceit could start flitting there.

“Please don’t gloss over the supposition that Patton can make a shield. I would like to know what that means,” Logan said.

“Put your hand on Patton and they can show you,” Roman motioned to Patton with a big cheesy smile.

“If you don’t want to touch me, you can just hover your hand nearby,” Patton said, standing up out of their chair and moving it out of the way, staying just clear of the table. Logan stood up and held out his hand, hovering it close to Patton. Patton scrunched their face and focused, and Logan’s hand was pushed away. Patton exhaled, sounding strained. Virgil would be worried about the public display of powers if it didn’t just look like Logan pulled his hand back to any curious onlookers.

“What an amazing magic trick,” Logan said, looking at his hand. Roman laughed and finished off his ice cream. Logan sat back down, looking mystified.

“I bet you want seconds after that. You want more coffee, Virge?” Roman asked, getting up from his chair as Patton sat back down with a sigh.

“Yeah, thanks Ro,” Virgil smiled and squeezed his hand.

“Do you want a different flavor, Pat?” Roman asked and pushed his chair in.

“I want that gelato milkshake with the dark chocolate and hazelnut,” Patton replied, finishing their cup of gelato with a few scrapes against the side.

“You want seconds, Logan?” Roman paused before heading back inside to see if Logan wanted anything.

“No, thank you,” Logan nodded. Roman went inside. “How did you do that, Patton?” Logan asked, looking between his hand and Patton’s tired-looking face.

“It’s hard and takes a lot of focus,” Patton leaned back. “Come sit next to me. Please, V?” Patton asked, Patting Roman’s abandoned seat. Virgil switched seats for Patton. Patton leaned against Virgil and closed their eyes as soon as Virgil sat down.

“Good thing we’re getting you more food,” Virgil chuckled slightly. “I don’t know if you’d make the walk back without it,” He mused, reaching up to play with Patton’s hair for a second.

“I’m demanding a piggyback ride, either way,” Patton crossed their arms and nodded, still leaning tiredly against Virgil.

“I’m fine with that if my wonderful boyfriend is,” Virgil shrugged.

“If Patton requires assistance, back I would not be opposed to you helping them,” Logan said, possibly still trying to figure out the magic trick, because he was very distracted and checking his own hand.

“Hey, seat thief,” Roman grumbled as he came back with the milkshake for Patton and another espresso for Virgil. Patton pouted intensely at Roman. “Fine, I don’t need it, anyway. Are you ready to head back?” Roman huffed, but his annoyance melted away quickly at Patton’s expression.

“I am. I hope you explain to me how you did that trick sometime,” Logan asked in wonderment, getting up from the table.

“Only Patton can do that, sadly,” Roman sighed. Virgil got up and squatted down, and Patton leaned forward on his back. Virgil picked them up and did the rest of the work, turning around to let Patton grab their milkshake off the table and they took off back to the dorms. Roman held on to Virgil’s espresso for him while Virgil carried Patton.

“I would still be interested in learning the mechanics,” Logan said, sounding intrigued.

“So would modern science, probably,” Virgil joked airily. “Do you have time to meet D?” He asked Logan hopefully.

“I have finished my homework for now and am mostly caught up in my studies, I can spare some more of the evening,” Logan said, walking alongside Virgil. The sun had gotten low enough as they ate gelato and Virgil was free to walk around without gearing up, which he was very thankful for. Keeping his hands covered while carrying Patton would have been a pain in the ass. Hopefully, that meant that Deceit was on his way, too. Virgil missed him a lot.

“Drop your shield,” Patton whined.

“You should know I couldn’t drop my shield outside if I wanted, don’t you remember that knot Roman talked about?” Virgil groaned.

“I’ve named it Balthazar,” Roman chirped, sniffing Virgil’s coffee through the small mouthpiece.

“Okay,” Virgil drawled in bafflement, but just rolled with it. “Balthazar says the outside isn’t safe, so I can’t drop it,” Virgil supplied.

“I am proverbially lost once again,” Logan said, sounding annoyed.

“Logan, how do you feel about the supernatural?” Virgil asked plaintively.

“It is an interesting story,” Logan responded, sounding vexed and confused.

“How would you feel if the supernatural was real?” Virgil continued questioning him.

“That is not realistic, I don’t need to consider that,” Logan said. “Is this line of inquiry supposed to elucidate me in some way?”

“Yeah. Just, for the sake of argument, think about how you would feel about some supernatural things being real,” Roman said, flipping around his free hand and looking like he was considering drinking Virgil’s espresso. He better not be.

“Roman, the sun is down and you’re already up way too late for your morning classes, don’t you dare,” Virgil hissed in objection.

“Fine! Fine! You don’t have to bite my head off,” Roman huffed. “It just smells good is all,”

“One sip,” Virgil said, holding out a single finger. Roman smirked and took a drink.

“Hot,” Roman held out his tongue.

“Idiot,” Virgil chuckled.

“Are you okay, Roman? Here, have some of my milkshake, it’ll cool down your tongue,” Patton passed Roman their milkshake. Roman took it and sipped gratefully.

“That is unsanitary, Patton,” Logan looked a little disgusted as Roman passed Patton’s milkshake back.

“It’s fine if it’s Ro. Did you consider what Roman said?” Patton looked hopefully at Logan.

“It would be very interesting despite the implications being concerning,” Logan admitted, sounding a little frustrated.

“Would you care to extrapolate on the concerning implications?” Virgil asked plainly.

“Oh my god, you’re such a nerd,” Roman rolled his eyes at Virgil.

“You’re both sugared up and wild. Let the man think,” Virgil chuckled.

“I don’t like the concept that there are certain things are simply outside of human understanding,” Logan said after a moment of consideration.

“Well, that’s a tough one. But would you open to the possibility despite the drawbacks?” Virgil asked gently.

“I… suppose. But this is a silly thing to consider,” Logan insisted.

“It’s just friendly conversation, Logan. The silliness can be for the sake of recreation or whatever. I don’t speak nerd as fluently as Virgil,” Roman flipped his fingers dismissively.

“I suppose that’s fair. I’d be very interested to meet extraterrestrial life,” Logan said brightly, looking much more upbeat.

“What about terrestrial but still extra?” Roman asked, tittering. Virgil shot Roman a look of annoyance. Even if it was accurate, it was a little rude. One of those ‘just @ me next time’ kind of feelings. Roman stuck his tongue out at Virgil, looking very proud of himself.

“I’m afraid I don’t follow,” Logan furrowed his eyebrows.

“Non-human species on earth,” Virgil clarified.

“Who are dramatic and wear too much fake makeup,” Roman smirked. Okay, Virgil wasn’t sure if this was better or worse.

“I resent that, Princey. I may be a kettle but the pot shouldn’t throw stones in glass houses,” Virgil glowered at Roman.

“I, uh, that’s too many metaphors, Virge. I have absolutely no idea what you just said,” Patton said, a little flustered.

“Mood,” Roman said, nodding in agreement.

“You’re too dramatic to be calling me dramatic,” Virgil frowned.

“Boys, boys, you’re both dramatic,” Patton said patronizingly and patted Virgil’s head. Virgil sighed theatrically, perfectly aware of the irony. Roman tittered behind his hand at that.

“So you don’t object to me saying you wear too much makeup?” Roman continued to laugh at Virgil.

“It’s the style,” Virgil shrugged as much as he could manage with Patton on his back. Patton giggled at the bump.

“I like Virgil’s makeup,” Logan said, surprising Virgil. “His makeup aside, though, I think it could be educational to meet non-human species. I would love to study them,” Logan said. “I also agree that you both have had too much sugar,” He added, sounding a little amused by it. Patton giggled and took a long sip of milkshake.

“Cool. Vampires are real,” Virgil said matter-of-factly. Roman spat out something next to him. Damn it, was that fucker stealing his espresso again? He will never get to sleep. Virgil sighed deeply and shot Roman a glare. Roman grinned brightly back at him, making an innocent face. That bitch.

“This again? Honestly, it’s getting old. I thought this was a discussion for entertainment purposes,” Logan made a face.

“It can be two things!” Patton said cheerily. “Are werewolves real?”

“Yes, and they’re assholes,” Virgil groaned, remembering some unpleasant interactions with them.

“I’m pretty certain that’s racist, Virge,” Roman snickered.

“Fine, the limited number of werewolves I’ve met are assholes in that they picked fights I didn’t want to engage in. They’re just as territorial as vampires,” Virgil amended his statement. “There’s no stupid twilight rivalry or anything, it’s just territory nonsense. There’s a reason I don’t set one,” The annoyance with them continued to leak out in his voice despite trying to stay neutral.

“D mentioned mermaids, are those real?” Roman asked excitedly.

“Yes, but they don’t look anything like Ariel. There’s one I met in France that really knew how to jam,” Virgil answered this one much more jauntily. He was a fan of merpeople.

“When were you in France?” Logan asked incredulously.

“Mid-1800s? I was with D at the time,” Virgil said, looking up and trying to remember specifics, but he couldn’t. He shook his head slightly as he gave up.

“And danced the paso doble with him,” Roman snickered behind his hand. Virgil shot Roman a look, but he put up the innocent face again. Virgil could only diagnose him with too much texting with D combined with espresso. Or maybe he’s just feeling like being a bastard today, which was a mood.

“You have to let me see!” Patton said, bouncing slightly in Virgil’s arms.

“Pat, be careful, I don’t want to drop you,” Virgil hissed and held Patton tighter.

“You won’t drop me,” Patton wrapped their arms around Virgil’s neck, putting their milkshake right next to his face.

“I don’t have a dress for it,” Virgil said dismissively. “And I’m not hand-sewing one again, I continue to be thankful for electricity,” Virgil groaned.

“Then we’ll go shopping,” Roman smirked and held up an arm as he suggested.

“I regret ever suggesting gelato,” Virgil rolled his eyes and huffed at the sugared-up idiots.

“No, you don’t,” Patton grinned against Virgil’s ear and nestled their head into his neck.

“No, I don’t,” Virgil laughed in agreement. It was nice to see them so happy, even if he and Logan were slightly distressed with their nonsense.

“You are very creative, Virgil,” Logan said dismissively.

“Thanks?” Virgil raised his eyebrow. Virgil couldn’t blame him for needing more proof. Maybe this wasn’t the best idea, but Virgil was already in it and may as well finish the job. The delightful and telltale thrum of reconnecting with Deceit hit as they continued their trek back to the dorms.

“D’s near!” Patton cheered, jumping again. Virgil flinched from the sudden high volume declaration.

“Pat, you’re right next to my ear,” Virgil hissed, wishing he could reach up to rub his ear.

“Sorry!” Patton whispered apologetically and squeezed Virgil lightly. Virgil rolled his eyes. This was all getting ridiculous.

personal taglist: @elizabutgayer

the taglist repository (ask to be removed):

supernatural beings taglist: @callboxkat @legendsgates @nonasficcollection @rainbowbowtie @10moonymhrivertam

DLAMP taglist: @somehow-i-got-an-account @a-fandom-trashdump @averykedavra @legendsgates @notveryglittery

Virgil centric: @demoniccheese83 @thatgaydemigodnerd @arya-skywalker @rainbowbowtie

#tsss #sanders sides #tsss fanfiction #sanders sides fanfiction #tsss fanfic #plea for my new self #vampire!virgil #college au #supernatural au #fanfiction #fanfic #ayri writes #prinxiety #analogical #eventual dlamp/calmd

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thewebcomicsreview · 4 years

Photo

Homestuck 2 Liveblog, Part 3

(See older parts here or on Tumblr here)

Chapter 3: How Are your feelings

We’ve got a new ship, which appears to have sails for some reason, and it’s either rocketing forward with determination, or crashing. Presumably, this is the ship containing the Meatworld Crew, who set out to rescue Rose from Dirk’s mind control. God, this plot is so complicated.

In anyone else’s hands, this is just a microphone. In my hands it’s a pipe boat.

The one spoiler I had for this chapter was that the ship design was stupid, and...yes. That says “Grandpa Harley” a lot more than the Theseus did, though I don’t think Canon Jake ever smoked.

Oh boy, the narration text is in the first person. It’s also lowercase, so one presumes this is Calliope, in Jade’s body? I thought Calliope was trying to maintain the role of invisible narrator, though, and she’s calling attention to herself more obviously than any of the other narrators.

Me on my way to steal your girl by possessing her and floating around all creepy for three years

JADE: the prince’s power grows.

KARKAT: JESUS CHRIST!

Heh. This art is really nice. Jade’s speaking in Calliope’s red text, so she is indeed possessed by Calliope. Poor Jade. Homestuck proper is 8,192 pages. The epilogue is 100,000 words, and we’re 100 pages into Homestuck 2. Jade has been stuck on a boat, possessed, unconscious, dead,possessed again, or otherwise out of the story since Cascade, all the way back on page 4,109. No wonder she became a hedonist. Of course, who’s fault is it that Jade missed the final battle.

(From Homestuck 1).

I always read this as foreshadowing that Jade would get a big moment, and it never happened. Hopefully someone on the writing team remembers that Jade is supposed to roar to life and show everyone who’s the real master. But for now, alas, the real master is Calliope, hypocritically fighting for the free will of all by taking Jade out of the story again. Anyway, that was a long tangent and a lot of search (give me back the .txt file of the whole comic, Viz!) back to Homestuck 2.

Oh hey, DaveKat is canon now, I forgot. It’s mildly annoying that Dave and Calliope are in the same scene with the same text color, but whatev.

Aww, Karkat’s wearing Dave’s shirt. How cute. Less cute: Calliope’s added her red to Jade’s outfit, including her logo. She’s really just as evil as Dirk, isn’t she?

Also, I don’t know if this sprite style quite works for a “leaning up in bed pose”

This just looks odd. Probably doesn’t help that we’re see Dave without shades for I believe the first time ever.

KARKAT: OH, PARDON THE FUCK OUT OF ME FOR OVERREACTING A LITTLE WHEN MY GOOD FRIEND "POSSESSED JADE" BUSTS INTO MY RESPITEBLOCK AT 5 AM!

Aw, I missed this, a Karkat tantrum.

I like this dynamic. But if they’ve been on this boat as long as Dirk has been on his, Jade’s been possessed for three years.

Why are Dirk and Calliope’s powers growing, though? Especially Calliope, shouldn’t she be maxed out by now? She literally ate Lord Engl-

....

Calliope is powerful enough to escape Candyland because she ate Lord English, and Lord English is partially comprised of Dirk, so there’s quite literally a little bit of Dirk inside Calliope right now. That’s maybe something to keep in the back of our minds, but now I’m theorycrafting.

The only way twenty-somethings can afford an apartment this night is if they live somewhere with a killer commute, which is why it takes three years to get anywhere

Okay, phew. So this Roxy is trans, but the Roxy on Candyland isn’t. That’s something I’m going to have to be careful to remember lest I use the wrong pronoun for the wrong one and everyone gets mad at me.

Dirk, like the coffee, getting roasted here

So, has this crew not been chasing Dirk for three years, or has Dave just been all “I sure am comfortable with you being trans now” incessantly from age 23 to age 26? I guess that’s pretty in-character for him. Everyone seems to not be used to a situation they should be used to be now so far, but maybe that’s just for our benefit as readers who can’t remember all this nonsense?

I love how Kanaya the Fashion Troll is basically the only character in the entire franchise to go “Fuck I haven’t been onscreen in over ten years I should change my look”. The big bow is Rose’s from way back when her and Kanaya first met, which is a cute nod.

Okay I get that they want to remind these things to the reader, but Dave. Dude. She’s your sister-in-law. She’s been your sister-in-law for 7 to 10 years depending on how long you’ve been on that boat and she’s been a vampire that whole time. Someone give this boy a set of flash cards, Jesus Christ!

OBVIOUS FORESHADOWING ALERT: This story is about a “young prince”, and this is going to be a metaphor. The young prince is Dirk, the Prince of Time, and the Rose is....Rose.

Aww, this is cute. I should have put on Kanaya’s Theme while reading this, it fits the mood of the scene really well.

Oh man, none of these people know John’s dead

fffffffffffffffff

Okay, so that’s 7 years between the end of Homestuck 1 and the Homestuck Epilogues. Dirk’s been on his boat for three years, but we’re with the Meat Crew at the start of their journey, (which means Roxy only recently came out as trans, which I guess makes it less weird that Dave is still processing it).

But god, this is a lot of timelines to keep track of. I guess it’s fun in a way, being intensely convoluted was part of the fun of trying to piece together Homestuck 1′s plot, but I think I’m this close to busting out a white board where and how old everyone is actually fuck it

God as my witness, I will one day have a vague understanding of what the fuck is going on in Homestuck and I will die trying!

This seems metatextual, in that the characters are more complete when they have like a goal and stuff. Or it might be the Homestuck 2 writers taking a subtle jab at the Epilogue writers, that everyone’s better off having left the epilogues behind and moving on to Homestuck 2. That might be reading too much into it.

Of course, as soon as I say that we cut from Dave talking about how everything’s better to Karkat talking about how everything’s worse.

Wait, non-god Calliope is on the ship? UGH, the whiteboard already needs to be updated! The epilogues implied she was too scared of god-Calliope to leave her room, so I’d assumed she’d stayed behind. Damn it.

Heh. Also: Huh? Karkat is making a lot of assumptions here, given that Terezi, Sollux, and Aradia are all alive, he never saw Gamzee die, and Vriska dying just made her more powerful.

And that’s the update! I like these character interactions, even though they’re mostly just sitting around and naval-gazing like in Act 6 and the epilogues, because at least it’s got some jokes it feels like it’s all going somewhere. And starting next month, it’s going to be going there twice as fast

#Homestuck #Homestuck 2 #Homestuck 2 Liveblog

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bhadpodcast · 7 years

Text

Best Listener

“Best Listener” is a weird superlative to get when you’re a closeted teenager in high school. Damon was pleased to get it, happy he’d made some sort of mark on his class body, something more permanent than they’d left on him. But still, it was a weird thing to actually think about. Best listener could also mean “Most Quiet” which could be construed to mean “Most Often Unheard” or “Most Misunderstood”. Either way it was a weird thing to contend with, to be called or thought of.

Perhaps though, since he was such a good listener, it’s the reason why Damon was able to pick out the irony in the honor bestowed to him. And besides, it wasn’t wrong, he was a good listener and his friends now told him all the time. And there were times he liked to be listened to, but he has his people for that. So he doesn’t need to talk so much. Mostly he listens.

“Twitter is weird, right?” Dylan is lying on his back and Damon is kneeling on the floor, arms wrapped around the boy’s thighs as he noses at Dylan’s ballsack and kitten licks his taint. He’d had to wax for a movie role and kept it up long after wrap just in case of reshoots. He’d be letting it grow back out soon so this was the last hurrah for a while. The grow back period was always a special form of fun for Damon. He liked the prickly wiriness and how the body stubble would feel against his chin, like a lover growing in their beard.

“I mean, like, Colton and I just had this convo about having Adele’s babies, right?” Dylan said, running his hand over Damon’s head, gasping lightly as he watches Damon taking one ball into his mouth. Damon knew the conversation. The show demanded that each of the cast get and maintain a Twitter account. Something about it being the future of celebrity/fan interaction and it’d be all the rage, Facebook for the common man! Interconnectivity within 140 characters! Damon didn’t know too much about it, just that Ashton Kutcher was hot.

(READ MORE)

Damon doesn’t reply, his mouth is busy anyway, so he continues suckling and waits for Dylan to continue.

“And so like, I’m literally saying that I -a human male- completely lacking of a cervix would have Adele’s baby. And the number one anatomy question? My fucking hips!” At the word hips, Dylan thrusts his slightly. He looks down at Damon apologetically who just smiles. Damon lifts up Dylan’s legs, bending them at the knee and reaches his tongue forward to spelunk in Dylan’s sunken place.

“The fucked up thing is that- shit!” Dylan cuts off as his head goes back and he sighs. His back is arched and his nipples are starting to pebble. There’s a tuft of hair regrowing in the middle of his chest. Damon sneaks a finger through it while the other joins his tongue. “Fuck, I love when you do that! I’m totally going to do that when- shit!”

Damon smiles smugly at the boy who comes down from his bliss rest stop and flips Damon off, grinning devilishly.

“I’m still a newbie, but I swear when I become a pro, I’m going to fuck you up.” Dylan says cheekily as he rubs his nipples and glides his hands up and down his sides. Damon glances into his sparkling eyes and nods.

“I’m looking forward to it.”

Dylan laughs in that silent, open mouth thing he does and lays his head back again.

“So anyhow… wait, what were we talking about?”

“I’m going to go with Nothing for $400, Alex.”

“Don’t be a dick, we were fucking talking about… umm, shit! Fuck, was it Shakira? Something about hips? “

“You’re so fucking high.” Damon laughs. He should know, he’s fucking high as shit too. Dylan shakes his head first and then thinks better of it, nodding enthusiastically.

“Okay, so yeah, I’m fucking high, but this isn’t weed’s fault, bro! This is why it’s impossible to have intelligent conversation with a tongue in your ass!”

“Oh, I don’t know. I’ve had some really cool conversations with your ass.” Damon quips with a bite to the inside of Dylan’s cheek. Dylan laughs brightly.

“Woah, really? What about?” He asks, unbothered. He’s fisting his cock slowly and holding his balls out of the way as Damon tongues around his rim.

“Mostly about what an asshole you are.” Damon answers with a smacking kiss directly to the boy’s hole. He looks up and sees Dylan peering down at him shaking his head.

“Damn, I walked right into that, didn’t I?”

Dylan’s been more open with him lately, about himself, which Damon appreciates.

“Nah, I’m just that smooth.” Damon edges his tongue along Dylan’s ring again, this time punctuating the ministration with a light blow of wind from his mouth. Dylan giggles.

“Yeah, I guess you are.”

“So you were saying something about having Adele’s babies?”

Dylan nods as though coming back online and grins, partially at Damon’s superior listening skills and partially at the act of his balls being back in Damon’s mouth.

“Yeah! I was saying the fucked up thing is that as long as it’s a guy and a girl, I can be as outrageous as possible and no one blinks an eye, right? But like, if I try to apply the logic that in order to be a pregnant male, Adele would have to have a dick, then it’s gay and everyone gets really weird.”

Damon looks up at the boy.

“Dyl, what the fuck are you talking about?”

Dylan laughs again and shrugs, “Dude, I don’t fucking know!” He sits up and scoots back to the end of the bed leaning against the headboard. He motions for Damon to move closer so he’s not on his knees at the end of the bed, instead laying in between Dylan’s legs. Thoughtful.

“I tried saying something to Hoech about it.” Dylan’s been more open about talking.. well not exactly about Hoechlin, there are times few and far between he’ll mention his name like this, but about his place on the sexuality spectrum at all. He’s working through it, Damon can tell. Trying to figure out what type he is, what he likes, where he fits, if that’s weird. “I said something later while he and I were at Colton’s -I think you and Dan were hanging out- and I was like,

‘I feel like if Adele did want me to have her babies, she’d be real gentle about getting them into me. Like, she’d take real good care of me.’

And I remember watching Colton who laughed like he was nervous, but he has that mask thing going on, you know? And so he’s doing that, but he’s watching Hoech who’s watching the game and just shrugs and says,

‘There’s artificial insemination, bro.’

In that weird, noncommittal way he has, you know? And like, you could hear a fucking needle drop and that’s when you called and me and Colty met you later.”

Damon nods (or rather, bobs), remembering the night. He and Dan had done some shopping for the show and later met up with Colton and Dylan. They’d gotten gelato and Dylan paid for it. Damon wasn’t sure why he remembered that.

“And it made me think -and this is where the me being super high part comes in- but like, how can you be gay and not like dick?”

This makes Damon laugh and choke slightly on the cock in his mouth. Dylan reaches out and instinctively grabs a water bottle from the side table. Damon waves off his concern, but takes a sip before leaning forward and fake strangling Dylan. The little imp is still laughing.

“Did that even make sense in your head?!” Damon yells, poking incessantly at the boy.

“I told you I was fucking high! But hear me out!” Dylan pleads, both hands up and his bambi eyes in full defense mode.

“Okay, so like… what?”

“Okay, I know, but like, everything you can do with a guy, you can also do with a girl, except those things that require a dick, right?” Dylan tries to look matter-of-fact, but even he knows he sounds ridiculous.

“Well there are strap-ons.”

“Well yeah, but I mean, naturally. So it would reason-”

“Oh, so we’re using reason now?”

“Bro, shut up! This is so deep, I promise.”

“Whatever.” Damon lays his head on Dylan’s chest, thumbing the pouty nipple until it blushes and rounds out.

“It would reason, that if you were a dude and wanting to get up on another dude that it’s because you really like dick, right?”

“Well, I don’t know, Dyll, that might be the thing for you, but I guess, like some dudes like really manly, hair lumberjack dudes and some like them twinky, like you.”

“I’m not a twink!” Dylan insists, but laughs when Damon looks at him incredulously.

“I’m only hairless because of the movie, it’s growing back in!”

“Yeah, sure.”

“But I’m a top! Can you be a twink top?”

Damon thinks back to his twink days briefly before shrugging. “I think it’s different for everyone though. Like, some gay dudes don’t even like ass.”

“You see? That’s fucking crazy to me!” Dylan throws his arms up and ogles at Damon in disbelief, “Like, I’m not one to care all that much about labels, but how can you call yourself a gay dude and not like ass? I love ass! I love dick!”

“But you’re not gay.”

“I guess, but I’m pretty fucking close, right?”

Damon cocks a brow, “If Selena Gomez grew a dick you’d be all over that.”

Dylan opens his mouth to debate, but his eyes flick upwards, imagining some pop star abomination and he gapes. “Holy shit, and a beard!? Wait, I don’t know.. I think I may like girls for one thing and guys for another? But like, I wouldn’t be against testing that situation.”

“You’re so fucking weird.” Damon says shaking his head. He gathers Dylan into his arms and Dylan runs his hands up and down Damon’s body, pausing only to briefly grip Damon’s inner thigh.

“I don’t want you to tell me if you can’t, but like… is Colton gay? I never really thought about my gaydar, but I feel like, I could be a good friend to him, if I came out to him, you know?”

Colton was gay, but it wasn’t Damon’s story to tell. Colton’s waited his entire life to be gay and as long as he’s in Hollywood, he’ll wait longer. The day Dylan mentioned earlier he’d actually called Colton to go to an after party of some guy one of the crew of The Vampire Diaries had met at some gay bar in the city. Colton mentioned Dylan and they decided instead on gelato. Weird because Damon knew that Dylan would have loved that party. But these stories weren’t meant to be told yet. Damon just shrugs and looks at Dylan knowingly. Dylan nods and leans over, kissing Damon on the cheek.

“I love that I can talk to you. You’re such a good listener.” Dylan traces a finger over Damon’s eyebrows, clearly imagining someone else’s. Damon sighs. He’s happy Dylan can talk to him. He talks to Posey about pussy. Flirts with Hoechlin about sports. And he talks boys with Damon’s ass.

“You can always talk to me Dylan. Or not talk. Or I can try to make you speechless.”

Dylan’s eyes widen, but then narrow mischievously. He’s learning how to flirt with them. He’s a quick study.

“Sooo… I… Can I fuck you again? Doggystyle?”

“Whatever you want.” Damon replies, kissing him on the nose. Dylan quiets, gets contemplative in that way that he has.

“And if I say… if I say.. like, is that okay? I fucking don’t really want to be an asshole, but is it okay with you that I sometimes say his-”

“Whatever you need, Dylan. This is about you.”

Dylan looks at him as though a bit skeptical. Which surprises and only endears Damon more to him. He realizes he’s not lying. It really is about whatever the young boy wants and needs, about giving that to him. He kisses him soundly, their tongues mingling, Dylan’s searching for a memory of what he still thinks he can’t have and Damon’s searching for ways to make real a fantasy. It works, for a few moments Damon thinks it works though he’s never totally sure when Dylan falls quiet.

Dylan rolls them on the bed and kisses Damon again, holding him to the mattress with a firm hand anchored in the middle of Damon’s chest. He kisses his neck and then sits up, surveying the land laid out before him. He signals for Damon to turn over, which he does, and pulls up his hips. Damon rests his head on his forearms as he hears the click of the lube bottle cap and the rip of the condom wrapper. Dylan preps him in the sloppy, enthusiastic way that could practically be trademarked and finally enters him, bottoming out quickly and breathing hotly into Damon’s ear.

Damon can feel the tickle of Dylan’s growing in pubes at the back of his ass and apparently so can Dylan as he reaches back to feel where the two are joined.

“Fuck, that’s so hot. I wonder what it’ll be like with more hair. You’re less hairy than, fuck, I’m doing it again, aren’t I?”

“Dylan fucking move!”

“Yeah, yeah.”

Dylan pulls out slightly and snaps his hips in again, moaning obscenely, his head planted in the nape of Damon’s neck. As Dylan finds a rhythm his fingers graze Damon’s hairline in the back, following the ‘V’ it forms. The only other person on set who gets the V is-

“Hoech! Oh my fucking... Hoech-” Dylan sputters as he gets lost in whatever fantasy he’s in. Damon doesn’t bristle, just takes it, thinks of his own fantasies, maybe tries to ignore how Dylan is starting to make more and more of an appearance in them.

Dylan strips Damon until both are coming hard, their sweaty bodies shuddering with release. Damon knew well enough to put down a towel so he didn’t ruin his bed, and he’s using it now to quickly wipe down them both down as they position themselves shoulder to shoulder.

Dylan pulls out a cigarette and lights it, taking a puff before passing it to Damon. He gets it back and watches the revolutions of the ceiling fan above them.

“Speaking of beards… they.. they set up another date with that girl I told you about.”

Damon doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t really have to. Mostly he listens.

#dylanxdamon #dj

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