WOE, HORRORS BE UPON YE !!! Sun has the worst time ever but he's fineee he's doing great (lie)
Summary:
Sun had never doubted his lord.
When a god is as perfect as Lord Eclipse is, there is no reason to question his motives or words. To be his servant—his saint, his one true follower—is an honor like no other. Sun thought there wasn't a single thing he wouldn't do to make his lord happy.
Yet, today is Lord Eclipse's day of worship. He asks something of Sun as He places a knife in his hands, and for once, Sun hesitates.
Warnings: Religious conflict, crisis of faith, power imbalance, fear, threats of violence, coerced into murder(murder doesn't happen on-screen), angst, and hurt no comfort
Word count: 1,428
Sun had never doubted his lord. Not truly, at least.
While he doesn’t remember his childhood—or his teenage life, or his early adult life, or really anything before he met Him—Sun knows that he has adored and worshiped his lord from the very start. Their first meeting was so long ago now, several decades at least, but Sun remembers how he was graced with His presence when he needed it most.
Sun doesn't remember many details before He arrived, but he remembers crying and people and the earth shaking below him. He remembers holding onto something—or someone?—as echoed sounds of yelling and murmurs sounded around him. Someone with a blue and white color scheme was beside him one moment, then, there was nothing. A pitch black expanse that Sun could feel was unending. Finally, there was a bright light.
And then there was Him.
In all His beauty, in all His glory, in all His perfection. Glowing, good, holy. A god. He looked down at Sun like he was something more than a mortal who's body trembled at the very sight of him.
“Rest now, my Sun,” Lord Eclipse said. “The soul is willing but the body is weak. Push much further and there won't be much left of you to serve me."
So, Sun did. At least, he assumes he did, because his vision blacked out as soon as He finished speaking. When he woke, the world was peaceful under the lord's command and Sun eagerly served Him however he needed. Thus, Sun has faithfully worshiped and served his lord for many, many years. Inklings of doubt are inevitable, but he knew better than to think Lord Eclipse was anything less than perfect, so they were squandered quickly.
Sun had never once hesitated to obey.
Yet, now, he falters.
Lord Eclipse holds Sun’s hands—his unworthy, mortal hands—in one pair of His own, another pair gently placing a blade in Sun’s palms.
“I know that you know what day it is, Sun” Lord Eclipse’s centipede-like body curls around him in a way that is normally comforting and familiar, but now it feels constricting and claustrophobic. "So, please, indulge me on my day of worship, won't you?"
"Are... you sure this is what you want to ask of me, sir?" Sun meets his lord's one brilliant white pupil and lets out a nervous laugh. "I, uhm, think this may be out of my skillset! There's other people in the kingdom that can do this better than I," He excuses, trying to pull his hands away from the dagger.
Lord Eclipse squints down at Sun, His body curling a little tighter around the bot and effectively stopping his efforts to drop the knife. Sunlight pours in from stained glass windows behind Him and crown His silhouette with a golden light, leaving Sun entirely in His shadow. "There isn't," He says simply. "Who else would be better to entrust with this than my own servant? Truly, who do you think?"
Sun pauses. He looks to the side.
He doesn't know. He really, honestly does not know who else Lord Eclipse could burden this task with. Bloodmoon is long gone, Monty is inactive, but Sun is still here. He doesn't even really know if his Lord talks to anyone else anymore, so really, he is the only reasonable choice here.
But he doesn't want to be.
"You could always ask one of your other followers, the town is-"
"Sun." More of Lord Eclipse's hands start to grab onto the servant, forcing his head to tilt up and maintain eye contact. "What has gotten into you? Where is this behavior coming from? I expected enthusiastic agreement from my one, true saint. Why do you stall?"
Sun doesn't know.
"I just know I'm inexperienced with handling blades, my lord, and I only wish for someone to fulfill your task in the best way possible," is the lie that slips between his teeth.
"Yet, I've seen you handle blades quite well in many other situations." Lord Eclipse inches His face closer to Sun's. His eye squints, upturned in a way that suggests a smile if He had a mouth. "Nervous to take a life, are you?"
Sun hates the way his voice gets stuck in his throat. "Of course not. I'm never nervous to obey your command."
"Then take the blade and go."
"I shouldn't, my lord, I—"
"You should, Sun, just listen to me—"
"There's others out there—"
"There is no one else who can—"
"I don't want to!!"
The throne room falls silent. Sun realizes his mistake too late. Lord Eclipse leans back, but Sun knows it is not a mercy. He opens his mouth to apologize—to pray, to beg—but a hand wraps around Sun's mouth before anything more than a staticky breath can escape. He can hear the metal skittering of his lord's body behind him and he wants nothing more than to squeeze his eyes shut until it's all over, but he knows better than that.
"You don't want to?" Lord Eclipse repeats with an incredulous laugh. "Oh, poor Sunny, he doesn't want to! I'm sorry, have you forgotten who you've devoted yourself to, servant?"
Sun's hands are maneuvered by the god's many other, forcing him to grip the handle of the dagger with an aching force.
"Me," He hisses. "You are devoted to me; the god you worship is me."
"I know, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"
"Be quiet!" Lord Eclipse shouts and Sun's mouth shuts with an audible click.
His hands are tightening all around Sun's body, clogging his vents and cutting off his power and digging into his casing and Sun feels sick he feels horrible horrible horrible—
"I am going to make a very simple choice for you, Sun," Lord Eclipse drawls. "You are going to take this," He squeezes His hands around Sun's and he barely restrains a pained yelp. "and you are going to spill the blood of the lady down at the lake."
"Her?!" Sun blurts, shaking his head with such force that it his earrings nearly hit his face. "She's done nothing wrong! She's been a devout follower for decades, she spent years making that stained glass window for you! She—"
"She's been testing my patience is what she's been doing, Sun!" Lord Eclipse shouts over Sun. "And you're doing much of the same, now, aren't you?"
Sun falls silent. Keeping eye contact is a physically painful task at this point, but he knows he isn't allowed to look away. He can only hope that the fear thrumming through his circuits isn't as obvious in his face. Lord Eclipse merely huffs.
Untangling His multitude of limbs from Sun, He turns Sun around so that he's facing the door. He holds onto the servant's shoulders as He mutters into his ear, "Go, Sun. If you fail me, I will know. If her blood is not on this knife when you return, I will make your punishment long and agonizing. That is a promise."
And just like that, Lord Eclipse releases Sun from his hold to skitter away someplace out of view. The servant stands still, rooted in place as he waits for the sound of his lord's body to finally be quite enough to deem safe.
Sun's joints let out a long hiss as he untenses his body. He looks down at his hands, both still tightly clasped around the handle of the dagger, and lets out a pathetic whimper.
He does not want to do this. He does not want to be this kind of servant.
But those are the thoughts of the dissenters, aren't they? Unwillingness to wholly devote oneself to even the most extreme tasks is a sign of false loyalty and Sun is very truthful with his loyalty. The symbols of the eclipse that he burned into the back of his hands is enough proof.
So, he will do as he's told. He will kill the lady by the lake—that kind, wonderful lady who had never once spoken lowly of Sun and used to make him meals when the castle doors were still open—and he will bring his lord the proof.
He is doing this because he chooses to.
(He is doing this because he has no real choice.)
He is doing this because he loves his god.
(He is doing this because he can't hide from Him.)
He is doing this because he is a loyal servant.
(He is doing this because he has never been more afraid.)
Notes:
sun: wow i sure do love having a completely normal and healthy amount of devotion to my lord (he says, actively wearing himself down to be more compliant so he won't risk being hurt by the one person in his life that (unfortunately) never leaves)
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