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talkorsomething · 1 month

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Too [insert adjective here] for guard ...................

Well, it's only half related.

We "hit a pothole", "had a slipup", whatever you want to call it — sunday. Aka: for the sake of my sanity we are not labeling it a relapse but good god does it feel as though I have invited the demons back in.

I know why, but I don't really know why. Because, I mean... I never have, to begin with. So: when I decided i was doing it sunday, i accepted it. "Let it happen", as someone would probably say to me. It's not...

I've been thinking about it for a while now. It's like anything - it comes and goes, a few times a year, and no matter what, I always ignore it.

Except, maybe there's something I'm not paying attention to? Or, ignoring, is the better word for it?

Of course it would be the one thing I have happening in my life.

November, I was burnt out for unrelated reasons. It was a lot to take in. That made sense. Now? ... why now?

There's not really any pressure on me. Yes, I have to do things, yes, it will be noticed if they're bad, but ...... it's not important. We don't spend time on it. I'm coming back next year, but it might be at the cost of ... all of this. I think it's progress. I haven't touched my guitar in any serious capacity in over a year. I think it's progress.

I don't take compliments well. I can't tell if that's why I don't get them, but I'm not being corrected much either. Only when I drift too far from what the work is supposed to be, only after weeks of it going, I can only assume, unnoticed. I keep getting stuck.

...push it back down.

Telling me I'm doing good isn't telling me what I know I have to be getting wrong. I could take it, at the cost of... all of this. I'm anticipating, and I know it can come. This is not where I was when I started.

It's been said, I haven't been told, that not starting it means you're more of a burden, by making the other person have to do it first. I know that. I do. And still it doesn't help. I'm not drowning. It wasn't an accident, but it wasn't planned, either. I don't know you.

I don't know you.

I'm not a good person. I'm not a nice person. Every week I tell myself this is really it, and every week I come back, and ... what? Forget I ever said anything? Forget we're not friends?

Well, we're not, huh? Nobody is, with me. What you see I swear you misunderstand. You don't ask. If you do, well, I can't answer. We're at an impasse.

It's not even my fault we didn't make it. I shouldn't feel like this over nothing. I don't do anything. You will, correctly, not let me do anything, because potential doesn't matter if you can't back it up. If you won't back it up. I let things happen to me.

I don't even feel better. And, actually, ironically, i think i know what would let me feel better. If I can't be upset with anyone else, at least I can be with myself.

... but, well, not even that. Your heart in my hands, but I mean it diegetically. And metaphorically. I hate putting myself out there, I hate having to actually perform, and yet every time, no matter what, I do it. I'm fine. I only cared at the start, and even then not very.

I don't feel anything. Not a lot, anyways. I don't let it happen. I can't. I don't know what it'll mean if I start being honest with myself.

...

I've pulled myself out of this before. A few times, now. Different circumstances, but I've done it all the same. Seasonal depression notwithstanding.

I'm only here because I did things I was scared to. And still, I'm the same. No progress made. The only way out is to do it again but I feel like I can't. I can't.

Will someone just let me say that?

Will someone just fucking help for once?

#sh tw #(implied - i know i didnt actually say it in the post but yes i did c** myself sunday)#100% секретный дневник левы НЕ ЧИТАЙ #im cursed with being a bit too self aware so #i think its compounded by my nepotism hire ... not letting me do my nepotism hire things #(for legal reasons i cannot say)#and then to add to that not letting me do anything I probably COULD actually do given slightly more instruction (at guard)#its just ... im a very angry person actually . except right now thats because im not EATING RIGHT EITHER #BECAUSE ALL OF MY PROBLEMS ARE COMBINING INTO ONE BIG INTERCONNECTED PROBLEM #back to my point.#guard instructors decided that for my first year i will not do anything cool because i'm not able to learn in about 2 seconds flat #[read: get very upset very quickly when i get things wrong and then . cant do them because im trying not to have a breakdown over]#[something REALLY STUPID like NOT BEING ABLE TO DO A SIMPLE TURN WHILE MOVING WITH THE FLAG]#so like okay. i get it okay. i'm not good at this. could you at least TELL ME i suck so i can feel justified about feeling bad about it.#could you just fucking tell me this isn't a guard where you can show up with no experience. could you do me a real solid and tell me that.#i dont know maybe the real sign it wasnt for me was when i was seriously considering not turning up for the second 'audition'#really i just hate how much he yells at us. not even at ME because i do so little there is no room to fuck it up. just at everyone else .#it doesn't motivate me to come back but i NEED 'friends' so bad and i love performing so now i just get anxious enough that i cant eat ..#.. before going to rehearsal. which is stupid. because i've done it a million times before.#......#i'm just.... everyone says he isn't actually that bad. & he used to be worse. so it really is just me.#it's just me being oversensitive. because i've never had any REAL experience in ... just about anything #so; yes. it IS on me how I feel and obviously how I react. and I keep pushing it down because it's stupid; really; to still feel this way.#anyways. our last weekend without a competition is this very weekend #so you'll never guess who's having a REALLY FUCKING HARD TIME trying to practice #i'm like this close to going to bed early and without having done the dance warmup for the third day in a row.#лёва there is no TIME why are you STILL NOT PRACTICING for the love of god get it together #(oh also when i say 'friends' in quotes it is because i desparately want to believe we're friends but they dont even talk to me really)#(and because im not even IN most of the show theres not much to bond over. literally like i have everything down Decent enough (apparently)#so theres not even any 'i will help u with this toss' team bonding. no shared moment of we are all out of breath because i DONT DO ANYTHING

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nsomniacsdream · 2 years

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I have a hard time talking about American law enforcement, because I have ptsd (like a therapist told me this and everything) from my own experiences with cops and because it's so balls quaking insane.

Like, a cop in the United States can pull you over for any reason. Which is a nice way of saying no reason, because literally anything can be used after the fact as justification. A cop can say its cuz you looked at him, or didnt look at him, or it looked like you were holding something, or looked like you were driving too perfectly for it to be natural. It's insane.

There are apparently no circumstances where a cop can't just kill you. The line the courts have applied is "reasonably believed" you were a threat, but that's such a nebulous nothing limit that people get shot for reaching for their license, having their phone in their hand, you're running away with no weapon, not being able to follow conflicting commands, like anything. And cops are almost never charged, because every court is going to believe he could "reasonably believe" he was threatened. Fuck, if you give me enough time, I can make any situation seem juuuuust plausibly threatening enough to pass that bar. It's insane.

A cop can just rob you. Like tell you to give him your wallet, take all the cash out, and just walk away with it. Exactly like you would imagine getting robbed in an alley would go, except no one can help. And he doesn't even have to hide it, he just drops it in a box at the station and they put it in their bank account. It's legal. You can't prove it wasn't drug money. I can't prove any money wasn't at some point drug money. It's insane.

If a cop just walks in your front door and says "I'm here to kill you and your entire family" YOU ARE GOING TO PRISON IF YOU STOP HIM. There is no positive defense for assaulting a police officer in the United States, and doubly so if you kill him. You have effectively no defense against a homicidal cop, which happens same as any other job. Unless for some reason you have cameras all thru your house and clearly caught the audio of him saying that he's there just to kill you, you have zero chance of not going to prison, probably for life. And that's assuming you aren't killed "resisting arrest" while being taken into custody. It is a crime, in this country, for you to defend yourself under any circumstances if the person you're defending yourself from is a cop. That's insane.

You don't have civil rights if a cop says so. You have the right to have a gun, right? A lot of states have open carry. A cop can shoot you if he sees you have a gun. Doesn't matter if you have a license and everything. So you effectively don't have the right to bear arms if a cop can shoot you for exercising it. You have the right to protest. Unless a cop tells you to stop. He doesn't need a real reason to tell you to stop. And if you don't stop, you can be arrested or shot. So you don't really have the right to protest, do you? A cop cant just search your car or house, right? Unless he claims he heard something, or smelled something, neither of which can be proven. So a cop can search whatever he wants, as long as he pretends there was a "reason". So you dont have protection from unreasonable search and seizure, do you? These are no longer rights- they're things the cops allow.. for now. But legally, those rights have already been found to not actually be rights, because any random cop can decide to take that right from you, for any reason. It's insane.

These aren't like crazy things that I'm just making up, these aren't some weird twisted way I'm looking at something, these are all very real things that we all just.. ignore? Police abolitionists and the media bring these things up all the time, and the overwhelming response to it is: so what? Don't break the law and it won't matter. Blue lives matter. More police funding. Cops should have tanks. It's insane. And I always feel like im just rambling and sound insane when I say this kind of stuff because if you wrote a book and had the dystopian government doing the stuff that the police in this country do every single day, those same people who "back the blue" would line up to say stuff like "*Books government* wouldnt have a chance before us real americans stopped them" on twitter and not even get a hint of the irony.

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starrshaddow · 4 months

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I think mizu is pretty blunt and straightforward to the point it's easy to misunderstand her as being rude

If youre the kind of person that considers someone's tone and aligns it with what you think they think of you, then you'll probably think she straight up hates you the first time you met

I mean imagine being in a very social place (maybe school event.) and you know absolutely NO ONE but her. You dont know her either but you share one class with her and she seems pretty chill. You try to at least stick with someone you know in this very loud and crowded place. You strike a convo, a very casual but somewhat confident one at that.

"this much people is tiring to be around, right?"

And she just

Stares at you.

Dead faced stare, no emotion. nothing

And your heart sinks and you feel so embarrassed of yourself

You were too busy thinking about how she just ignored you that you didnt see her look away and kind of, slightly glance behind her for a sec

Turns out she thought u were talking to someone behind her 💀

mizu's def very awkward outside of conversations that can be professional, school related, or other people related (i mean if you ask her about how she knows this person, or that person)

she's not very well with small talk or talking abt herself?

"i think so."

When she spoke u feel reassured so u keep on trying to talk to her more, but the stuff she says are really limited. her voice pretty uninterested. It gave you the impression that you were bothering her. So eventually, you stop talking to her.

Then it was silent for a lil while,

"how about you?"

She spoke and you forgot what you were talking about before she spoke.

The music from the event and the group who was performing was so loud. Its hard to think

"what?"

Then she looks at you

Eyes blue and bright against the dark. Her face illuminated by the lights from the perfomance on the stage.

"why'd you come here even if you hate crowds?"

She's pretty

You will never deny that, as much as you will not say it out loud

___

I think when you left early, I think she walked with you.

You were both walking at the same path. You were both heading to the bus stop.

But when you got to the bus stop, she stops just a distance away from you.

"you ride the bus home too?"

"no." she places her hands in her trouser's pockets. "i just didnt want to stay there."

"oh."

Then its just awkward silence 😭

Istg the first to the five moments you shared with her, i believe she's super awkward. She does try to strike up a convo back but shes so bad at it that she ends up asking the most random things.

One time it was so random it made you laugh

And she thought you were mocking her and she looked kinda sad 😭 so you had to reassure her that you werent making fun of her and that her question was just super random it caught you off guard

you two meeting each other and spending time together in long period of time is rare. Even the class you shared together wasnt enough to hang out with her.

you didnt even know her name (you forgot)

"your name is mizu?" you said. The class was filled with chatter at the time since the professor wasnt there yet.

"Yours is (y/n), right?"

"yeah." then you smiled. "yours is prettier though. Suits you."

She looked confused for a sec, but nods.

She looked shy.

"thank you."

her voice was low. but she meant it.

But overtime, i think you two getting closer stemmed from when you didnt go to class for like a week?

She was wondering what happened to you. She wasnt even sure if she should check on you because, again, you guys share so little convo that she's not even sure if it was even enough to consider you as a friend and check up on you.

So i think she asked a friend of hers, probably ringo or akemi (her last resort was to ask taigen) if they knew you or share a class with you. but they all didnt.

So she waited for you to come to class.

Would glance at the door to see if you'd walk in.

you werent close to her

but despite tha she somewhat feels better when you're with her in the class, you know? You dont talk much but your presence is really comforting.

She has friends that check up on her a lot but there are times when they feel overwhelming.

Whatever awkward silence that eventually became comfortable silence between the two of you was something she missed while you were gone

And also the little convo you make. And her awkward ones (even tho being reminded of some of it make her stare at the wall and feel immense embarrassment)

It made her realize she'd actually like to get to know you more.

So when the door opened and you stepped in, dressed in that distinct fashion you usually wear, she felt relieved.

"you've been gone for a while."

you chuckled and place your stuff on the chair beside her.

"yeah. i got sick."

"do you feel better now?" she asked, genuinely concerned.

She definitely asked for your number that day. And she deeefinitely stared at your number when she got home, wondering if she should text you and ask if you got home safe.

I think mizu's wariness of trying to build/have more relationships (platonic or not) happened because of mik-(cant even type his name. He disgust me 😒). The fact she was so open to someone and shed all her walls for him just to be betrayed and forgotten like nothing transpired between them is traumatizing.

I like to think that mizu was on her maybe 1st year while he was at his fourth year. She was super naive and thought he was the nicest guy when all he did was give her the bare minimum 😔. I think she loved him enough to actually live with him (just the memory of it disgusts her). She lived far from the uni and she definitely has to commute long hours back and forth. So she thought it was a good idea to live with him (it wasnt).

Man, did that guy scar her so much she thought she wouldnt be able to finish her 1st year.

Anyways.

She did text you that day.

And she was more than surprised to see you texting her back almost immediately

I did! :D thanks for checking up on me. Hav u eaten dinner yet?

😭😭 I THINK MIZU FINDS YOU SUPER CUTE AND ENDEARING. LIKE YOU'RE A VERY SUPER WHOLESOME PERSON

You're just so?? Gentle and calm, it feels so reassuring and tranquil.

You feel like. this. Calming breeze of wind that soothes her

So she goes over her hesitancy of keeping and making relationships and starts pursuing you more, hoping to spend more time with you.

and when she did.. gosh.

You were a lot more than a gentle breeze, you were beaming with warmth as well.

She went out her way to check your schedule and compare it to hers. When she sees she have a vacant time, she goes to school to hang out with you

Say you have early classes while she doesnt even have classes that day? She'd wake up early to catch you on your morning break to eat outside with you.

It took you by surprise at first, but ofc you said yes

You just be sitting across from her, gazing out the window with her. You learned just now that Mizu likes the seats where she can see the outside. She's wearing a cozy loose sweater and her hair is tied up.

"what are the classes you're attending today?"

You see her purse her lips a bit and then she shakes her head. her little stray hair bouncing on her forehead.

"i dont have any classes."

What.

Your brain short circuited

She saw your confusion, but she looked at your hands which is now holding your burger too slanted that the ketchup is spilling on your palm.

So she gently took your hand in her own, which is much bigger than yours. She takes ahold of your hand so easy that it made your brain malfunction more.

"i said," she started as she took your burger away from your hands to wipe your palm with a tissue. "I have no classes today."

Then she held your hand, and looked you in the eyes.

"I just wanted to see you."

And so,

This was when YOU realized you were totally into her.

___

That made you so flustered that you couldnt forget it when you came home.

Your stomach feels so warm and you felt so giddy over that.

You know better not to get over yourself, but it was still something that you think about often.

After a few days, when you were on your way home after your last class

It was late at night

The moon was shining down

Then you see someone near the entrance of the building, tapping at their phone and seemingly busy.

you felt kinda scared and cautious. So you just speed walked out of there and walked even faster when you hear footsteps after you

"wait," they called after you. "(Y/n), wait!"

You stopped walking and turned to see Mizu catching up to you.

She has a small smile on her face when she finally caught up to you.

Then she laughed

She looked so carefree

"You sure do run fast even with those short legs."

she looks so nice when she smiles that it made you forget you were mad(?) at her for scaring you like that.

You frowned.

"You're just tall."

She walks up to you. Close enough that you can smell her perfume.

It's faint but strong. Of course she's the type to wear masculine perfumes.

"Hm." she said. "Can't hear you from up here."

You looked her in the eye and shuffled closer to her.

You can tell she tensed up a bit but her gaze remained on you, wondering what you will do.

You raised your hands near her face to pull her hood over her head and pull the drawstrings

"Shut up and go home. No way I'm walking with you now."

She still insisted on walking you home. Of course, you gave in.

Now you're standing and waiting for the bus.

"Won't you feel cold?" she said.

"It's not really cold out here." you said.

"I meant in the bus, on the way home. The uni is a bit far from your apartment, yeah?"

You thought for a moment, then you looked at her with a furrow in your brows.

"Uh, yeah. Why?"

Mizu didnt respond, she just has this knowing look on her face.

She shuffled a bit. You thought she was going to do something snarky, until realized she was taking off her hoodie.

She walked up to you and with her hoodie in her hands. She leaned close to fix it over your shoulder. She made sure it was hugging you snugly.

"tell me when you get home."

mizu walked you home that night and purposely wore a hoodie bcz she wanted to have a reason to have you borrow her clothes and see you in them.

She's totally showing you that she likes you but you don't realize it yet 😭😭

#mizu x reader

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imwetforyourmom · 5 days

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not her

pt2

warnings: swearing, jealousy, crying, comparison, not proofread

a/n: yall seem like super excited about this series and im all for it tf

a/n 2: if ts is lowk sad, thats my fault, it was an accident I was listening to partially sad music and rlly got into it

PREVIOUS CHAPTER ~~~ NEXT CHAPTER

over the past few days, matt and amelias friendship had gotten closer, while y/n and matts was no less than just the title of ‘dating’. they didnt hang out, they didnt talk much and they didnt go on dates. but when y/n did ask matt to do anything, it was always ‘cant. im with amelia’ or ‘cant. ill be with amelia then’. it was always amelia this, amelia that. but never ‘sure baby! i totally want to hangout with my girlfriend’

y/n was fucking over it. she wanted to talk with matt about this all. she wasnt fucking gonna deal with het own boyfriend not acting like her boyfriend.

so, thats where she found herself, standing behind matt where he sat with amelia next to him. it was very obvious was she was being more than friendly to him, her hand was caressing his arm and her eyes were staring deeply into his. y/n bit her lip, fighting back the urge to bitch slap amelia.

y/n ran her hands through matts hair, annoucing her presence. matt flinched at the sudden touch, whipping his head around to look at who had just touched his hair. his eyes softening and a small smile creeping onto his lips when he saw who it was.

“matt? can we talk please?” y/n asked, her eyes studying matts features, god how she missed being this close to him, to be able to admire him.

matt turned his head to look at amelia, before looking back at y/n, “im talking with amelia, maybe later?” he asked. remorse present in his voice.

y/n moved her hand away from him and took a step back from them, refusing to look at amelia, as her eyes glossed over and a lump in her throat grew. breathing grew harder and she knew talking wouldnt be any easier.

“y- yeah. thats fine.” she mumbled, her voice breaking, she took a breath in. and began walking away, but not before saying a quick “I love you” to him out of instinct. she took slower steps away, expecting one back, she wanted to hear him say he loved her too.

but when she didnt hear one back and only heard him resume talking to amelia, her eyes immediately lost all control over the tears in her eyes, the hot tears running down her cheeks faster than she could comprehend. she held her breath, trying to make no sound obvious to the sobs she wanted to let out. but she couldnt let matt know how upset she was about this, and she certainly didnt want amelia feeling the satisfaction of making her cry.

y/n moved quickly, leaving the library where that entire interaction went down and pushed past the doors of the school, walking quick to her car.

she opened the door and sat inside, closing it the door and immediately breaking down, her sobs being loud, her tears being fast as they poured down her cheeks and her breathing incredibly hard.

she couldnt fucking believe it, her own boyfriend chose some other girl over her.

the boy she used to kiss goodnight and sleep in his arms every weekend, the boy she used to be able to come to and expect not to be lonely, the boy she knew she could come to when she was upset or when she just wanted company. but now she wasnt sure if she could, matt only wanted to be with amelia and not y/n.

does he understand how much he meant means to y/n? hes the reason shes not lonely, he was the reason she was able to fall asleep so peacefully at night, he was the reason she was happy everyday, so content with life and now she couldnt have that anymore because of that stupid fucking girl. stupid fucking bitch named amelia.

she took him away from her and she didnt know what to do. its obvious matt wasnt interested in y/n and was only interested in amelia and what she wanted to say or do, not the girl he dedicated his life to, not the girl he told ‘im yours’, not the girl he used to say ‘I love you’ to every time he possibly could.

y/n just wasnt her, not amelia, not what matt wanted, she didnt have beautiful green eyes like amelia did, she didnt have that lovely orange color of hair amelia did, she didnt have naturally beautiful freckles covering her skin like amelia did. amelia was her, and y/n wasnt.

y/n only cried harder, pulling her knees to her chest and hiding her face in her knees, sobs escaping her throat. being so gutural, it scratched her throat with each sound leaving her lips. but that didnt compare with the aching pain she felt in her chest, the lump in her throat being so big she could barely breathe.

what matt had dismissed earlier so easily wasnt so easy to handle with for y/n. all she wanted was matt to be her boyfriend and act like it.

she wanted to dial his number and call him, but she couldnt run to him like she always did. he wasnt going to be there for her like he always was, but he was going to be there for amelia.

a pit in her stomach formed with the overgrowing urge to run to matt, her body so familar with always going to matt, being so familar with his hands rubbing her back as sweet words left his lips, his voice lulling her to the warm hug of being okay. but she couldnt have him, she couldnt have the same comforting feeling he brought her.

she wanted him, she needed him but he wasnt within her arms reach anymore and she felt sick. sick with words she wanted to tell him. sick with the need of feeling matts touch. sick to her stomach with just wanting matt in her prescense, he wouldnt even have to do anything. she just wanted him with her with the gentle reminder he wanted her too and in the same room, but instead he was talking with another girl, giving his attention to another girl.

‘another girl, another girl’ was all y/n heard, her thoughts screaming into her ears.

1107 words.

@luverboychris @chrissturniolosfavoritesexdoll @meg-sturniolo @junnniiieee07 @genshin-addict @mels22lunchbox @ssilentzom @haunted-headset @dollyspsychoxo @sturnib-tch @b2cute @livvy4realll @graysturns @wh0resstuff @jnkvivi @mattsmad @sturn-bugz @sleepysturnss @xbabyd0lli3x @norr1ssturni0lo @nayveetbhh @jamiesturniolo

#sturniolo #matt sturniolo #chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #nick sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #nicolas sturniolo #the sturniolo triplets #sturniolo fanfic #matthew sturniolo

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luna0713hunter · 7 months

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almost kisses that are interrupted by a third party with shanks? thank u 💗

Author's note : this is the last request for the kiss prompt!!! I'm so happy i did this prompt cause all your requests were amazing and i had a blast writing them!!! Pls look forward to my new prompt that'll be opening soon!!!

"almost kisses that are interrupted by a third party"

Based on this prompt

Warnings : not much, slightly suggestive,age gap relationship,pet names as usual

*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘

"do...do you think they're gone?"

"i have no idea, princess. But i must say, I'm not complaining about our current... situation."

You groan and smack your captain on the side of the head and try to peek from the slight crack of the door.

"i cant see shit!"

"you dont need to get upset. The guys will soon find us anyways." A gentle hand rests on your shoulder and you relax slightly under the touch.

"cant believe they ambushed us like that." You groan and your forehead lands against the wooden door with a soft "THUD".

The hand on your shoulder moves until its between your forehead and the door;not letting you bang your head again.

"it happens,my love. I'm just glad we got out without a scratch."

"we ran,Shanks. It was humiliating."

"running is not humiliating. Fighting without a good reason to is." He rests his chin on your head and you feel his smile in his voice, "there's no need to fight when we don't have to."

Your sigh fills the small closet in the back of a crowded bar; that was one of the many reasons you loved Shanks. Unlike other men,his first choice was never violence. He rathered get beaten up and have drinks poured on him,but never starting an unnecessary fight.

Unless,his friends and loved ones were in danger.

You were one of the very first people who experienced how royal Shanks was;when one night a drunken man started hitting on you with the most inappropriate words ever heard,Shanks had stepped in and punched the man so hard,it had him flying back and laying down unconscious.

Maybe that was the first time your heart beated so hard and fast for the red hair pirate.

Years had past since then,and never,not even once, you'd left Shanks on his own.

"i know," you softly whisper and lean back until you feel Shanks pressing his hard chest against your back, "just hated the way they bad mouthed you."

"i dont mind,doll," he whispers back,like sharing a secret. Like you already didnt know how selfless he is.

Like you didn't love him already.

"well,i do." You huff and turn slightly so you can see his face in the dim light coming from the crack between the door, "you should've let me beat their ugly asses."

You feel his lips on the top of your head and despite your anger,your lips twitch slightly.

"what kind of man would i be if i let my princess fight my battles?" His arm wraps itself around your middle and pulls you closer to his chest, "i would never want my baby girl to get hurt."

"you know I'm strong!"

"i fully well know that. But sometimes the strongest pirates get hurt as well." His lips find their way to your cheek,and then your temple,making you squirm slightly upon feeling his stubbles, "and i would rather die than to witness that happening my dear."

You close your eyes; basking in his presence and warmth. The moment feels so precious,that has you holding your breath in fear of breaking it.

And you know Shanks feels the same way;with the way his thumb rubs your hip and his lips travel up and down your face. You flutter your eyes open,you eyes immediately find his lips. You lean closer,feeling his breath on your lips and you're closing your eyes-

Before a loud banging on the door makes you jump where you stand.

"Yo!" You recognize Yasopp's voice while trying to calm your heart from jumping out of your ribcage, "you guys in there?!we should get going while its clear outside!!"

You hear Shanks chuckling and his lips press a gentle kiss to your nose.

"continue this later in my room?"

You smile and press your own lips to his cheek.

"see you there, Captain."

#opla shanks x reader #opla shanks #shanks x reader #one piece shanks #one piece live action x reader #one piece x reader

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wonder2realities · 1 month

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having trouble with manifesting physical results?

when it comes to manifestation, i feel like everyone acts like theres a limit and usually that limit revolves around physical changes. "you cant lose weight unless you work out AND listen to subliminals, you have to put in the work!!!" — what if i were to tell you that you can manifest literally any physical change without even moving? you probably wouldnt believe me because of the idea that you need to "work" to earn something...and yet with all of the physical changes i've manifested, i havent "worked" for anything. how? here's a little list of the rules i stick by !

1. SHAMELESSNESS IS KEY!

i'm someone who gets embarrassed very easily, over the smallest things but when it comes to manifesting anything...you gotta be shameless. yes i am waking up with a BBL and a 2-inch waist, what about it. you can pull up to my house, with scientific evidence of how thats not possible but idc cuz its happening. infact, it ALREADY happened "but you look the same" idc it still happened. like literally, no matter what its happening and its happened and it will happen ; whether it be past future or present point is ITS THERE.

2. YOU ARE ENERGY, NOT YOUR BODY

this ones a bit hard to word out but essentially, your physical body doesnt make up what you are. meaning, you can view yourself as this ball of energy that can be stretched and pulled out and morphed into everything and anything.

so lets say you want a symmetrical face :

1. dont go overanalysing your face, just sit down & take it easy

2. think of how your symmetrical face that youve always had. i mean you could honestly be a model, your facial structure is amazing. and just allow yourself to sink into those thoughts, whether its through you repeating affirmations or through subliminals — let it all sink in that your face is symmetrical. having doubtful thoughts? let them fly past, dont cling onto them. just allow yourself to sink deeper into the fact that your face is perfectly symmetrical.

3. acknowledge it and live with it. dont go eyeing your mirror and reflection every 2 seconds, dont go panicking and repeating affirmations nonstop and stressing...just acknowledge it and go on with your day.

^ its that easy. you dont need to even see your physical body morphing into it, the point is that you are able to morph and change into whatever you wish because you are not limited to your physical body.

3. NO OVERCOMPLICATIONS

you dont need to do a 40 minute workout to make sure you get results, you dont need to drink 3L of water, you dont need to write down 500 affirmations, you dont need to do a 20step skincare routine if you want to make sure you get clear skin...if you want to do these things, do them as much as you wish to. do you have to? no.

when i was younger, i got a bad injury and because of that one of my cheekbones were larger than the other — through manifestation they look identical now. like as in, if i were to tell you the injury i got into and said "my cheekbone was larger and there was a huge line under it" youd think i was making it up (sidenote : i had to show someone my passport photo from when i was like 8 to prove that i had that injury 😭 CUZ THEY DIDNT BELIEVE ME.) and mind you, i didnt even have a routine - my routine was literally just playing cute subliminals , vibing to the music and then going to sleep. i promise you, you dont need to do any form of "work" to get what you desire.

4. GO WITH YOUR GUT

probably the most important thing i stick by, i always go with my gut. meaning, if i feel like i can listen to a 5 second subliminal and i got it - i leave it there. i dont force anything, i dont push myself into anything and i dont do anything that someone else does if it doesnt vibe well with me. (this also means if youre reading this and going "this doesnt really work with me" - thatll be better than you forcing yourself to follow these rules just because these have worked for me). you need to always remember that when it comes to manifesting things, your preference comes first. so, if you wanna run 5 miles and that helps you believe that you have gotten your desires - do it.

5. DONT LET OTHERS GET TO YOU

if youre minding your business and youre talking abt your desires and someone goes "erm...🤓👆🏽 thats...not possible" - instead of secondguessing yourself literally ignore them. the concept of whats possible and whats real all boils down to what you BELIEVE is possible/real. the only reason something could not be possible or not be real is you believe it isnt, or you letting someone else who doesnt believe in it take over your beliefs (obviously this specifically applies to manifestation and not things that are tied to disorders or any form of unhealthy thinking. dont take my words out of this context.)

and thats all ! obviously i have other parts of my mindset that arent mentioned here that help me manifest faster and easier but it would take too long for me to get into everything </3 but consider these my 5 golden rules that will hopefully help anyone whos struggling with physical results.

rmbr that you are forever limitless & changing ★

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beannary · 9 months

Text

OK so I dont really like this but this 2012 tmnt mermaid au has been driving me INSANE so here are some mermaid designs for the boys (which I might change if I draw more stuff for this au) and some lore for the au under the cut!

also Donnie is ftm and Leo is mtf and those are the facts! (Donnie did do top surgery on himself, do NOT ask me how he did that underwater safely)

(just a quick note: I am using some japanese mythos for the mermaid part but I'm also being loosey goosey with it alskjdfh)

ALSO slight tw for cannibalism? or like cannibalism adjacent behavior

There is a yokai described in Japanese literature called the ningyo, a creature that is half human and half fish. Legend says that if you capture a ningyo and eat its flesh, that you will be granted eternal life. Hamato Yoshi and Oroku Saki were familiar with these legends, though Saki always believed in them more than Yoshi. Saki believed in the legends so much that he became obsessed with finding the legendary ningyo and becoming immortal after consuming its flesh. Yoshi accompanied his brother on these ventures, more out of a sense of familiar duty and a need to watch out for his younger brother than an actual belief in the ningyo.

And of course, it just so happens that the brother who does not at all believe in the existence of yokai would be the one to find one. Yoshi encounters Tang Shen, a ningyo who has been living throughout the local freshwater river system. And suddenly Yoshi realizes that Saki's quest for murder might actually come true since apparently these ningyo are very much real. So now whenever he accompanies Saki on his hunting quests, he does everything in his ability to try to dissuade Saki from his plan, and when he realizes that isn't going to work, he starts to sabotage Saki's efforts. And Yoshi does this because well he kept in contact with Tang Shen, and the two became close friends, and son fell in love, bridging the gap between yokai and human.

They can't get married, obviously, Tang Shen is fully a yokai, but they build their lives together and eventually Tang Shen falls pregnant with their daughter Miwa. The two weren't entirely sure what to expect of their child, but Miwa turns out to be a completely normal human child.

Over the years as Yoshi and Tang Shen's love and family grew, Yoshi started pulling away from his birth family, and more noticeably, from Saki, who was you know pretty angry with Yoshi who seemingly disappeared on him with no explanation. Saki channels his anger into his search for the ningyo, and it takes three years but eventually he does finally find one.

Around three years after Miwa was born, Tang Shen and Yoshi welcome in four new kids! Quadruplets! Three boys and a girl. And these four, unlike Miwa, seem to all be fully ningyo, which very much surprised Yoshi and Tang Shen (both the fact that there were four kids and those four kids are all mermaids) but hey, they knew their genetic situation would be weird and they were fully ready to hop into raising these four.

It's only a few days after the birth of their quadruplets, so soon after that they haven't even given them names, that Saki stumbles upon the home of Yoshi and Tang Shen. And He Is Pissed. Not only did his BROTHER ABANDON him but he abandon him to start a family with this yokai? The yokai that he's been hunting all this time? And Saki, like in canon, kills Tang Shen and Miwa. (Or well you know, he kidnaps Miwa and renames her Karai but Yoshi thinks Miwa is dead)

Yoshi manages to get away with the quadruplets in the chaos, and he tries so hard to establish a new life for himself in Japan, but no matter where he goes, Saki manages to find him. Eventually Yoshi gets desperate enough to flee the country, and he finds himself in New York City!

But meanwhile back in Japan, Saki did in fact end up eating Tang Shen but idk how he realizes it but he figures out that he didnt get immortality, and so he concludes that oh, Tang Shen must have been tainted somehow by her relationship with Yoshi, which sucks because now he has to find a whole other ningyo to get immortality. Luckily he happens to know of four ningyo that he would be more than happy to kill, which is basically Saki's drive to finding and killing the Hamatos.

Anyways that's all I have so far!!!! I'm trying to think about how they would live in NYC, if they can somehow become human (in maybe like an H2O just add water situation) or if they are stuck in the water all the time.

I'm leaning towards them being able to shed their fish tails if even only for a small amount of time, just so they can still be ninjas and train on land, since I think Yoshi would still want to train them to defend themselves. I think that if they can be human for a bit, they still get dried out really easily so they can't stay out of the water for very long, probably not long enough for them to go to school full time, so they still live super isolated lives. Or maybe Yoshi figures out a way to train them to fight in the water? Idk suggestions are appreciated!

They do eventually meet April and Casey, I think April is gonna be on the swim team and so she's a fairly strong swimmer (for a human) and so she spends a lot of time in the water with the hamatos which they appreciate a lot! I think maybe Yoshi isn't a super strong swimmer so as much as he tries to spend time with his kids he can't really.

Casey is still on the hockey team and he can't swim, the hamatos try to teach him but they fully dont know how to swim with legs and so they are Bad tm swimming teachers salkdjfh.

#my art #tmnt #tmnt 2012 #2012 tmnt #tmnt 2k12 #2k12 tmnt #tmnt leo #tmnt leonardo #tmnt raph #tmnt raphael #tmnt donnie #tmnt donatello #tmnt mikey #tmnt michelangelo

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 4 months

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AITA for slapping my mother in law?

I (27F) am married to my husband Jay (26M) and we recently had our first child Lily.

Well the pregnancy was a very very difficult one. I was throwing up every day for over six months, suffered long bouts of insomnia, developed gestational diabetes, standing up too fast made me incredibly dizzy, my entire body just constantly hurt, Lily kicked me so hard I legit had tears in my eyes (which combined with full body pain was...not pleasant) and to top it all off Lily weighed ELEVEN pounds and I tore really really badly.

Yeah...ow.

I love my daughter to death but never again. Ever.

Anyways after that literal hell of a pregnancy, I've been more or less bedbound for several weeks now while healing from that entire ordeal. Which means Jay has been taking care of pretty much everything, keeping the house clean, making food, taking care of me and Lily, etc. Its a lot I know and I wish I could do more to help but Jay has been insisting that I rest and recover and that he's got this. He's been handling everything like an absolute champ. Honestly if I didnt have him I dont know how I would be doing anything.

Well this morning Jay's parents came to visit and meet their granddaughter. So I was moved to the living room so I could introduce them to Lily and socialize a bit while Jay cooked lunch.

Now Jay's parents are very traditional. They believe that men make the money and that its the woman's job to take care of the house, the cooking, and the children.

You can probably see where this is going.

I introduce Mother in law to Lily and we get to talking. (Father in law went outside to go smoke)

Thats when mother in law asks why Jay is cooking. More importantly why Im NOT cooking. I tell her I physically cant even stand UP without help so how am I supposed to cook.

She only scoffed saying that I was just making excuses. I am very used to her bullshit by now so I just roll my eyes.

Then Lily started crying because she needed a diaper change. Mother in law tells me to go change her diaper. Again I cant even stand up by myself, much less get up to change a diaper.

I call Jay and he happily comes to get our daughter. Mother in law starts yelling, telling Jay no that I should do it because its my job. She grabs Lily and shoves her back into my arms and tells me to get up and go do it.

Jay, my wonderful angel, tried to tell her that I physically couldnt move for weeks and to mind her own damn business.

She then started yelling even more saying that I was making my husband do my job for me, calling me lazy and a slut (What that has anything to do with this? I have no idea) she went off on a complete tangent about how it was a woman's job to take care of the home and the children, that SHE managed just fine and she had five small children, that I was completely emasculating Jay, that I was a disgrace, etc.

She just kept going and going while not letting me and Jay even get a word in. Until eventually she said that my daughter will probably grow up to be a whore like I am.

I think it was a mix of pure exhaustion and hormones because somehow I managed to stand up for a moment and slap her across the face before immediately falling back on the couch.

Jay looked shocked, Mother in law looked livid. (Father in law was just watching from the doorway, equally as shocked.)

Mother in law started full on screaming, calling me every single name in the book until father in law physically dragged her out of the house by her arm.

Now hours later my phone has been blowing up with messages from my brothers and sister in laws, telling me that I was an asshole and that I had no excuse for hitting their mother.

Hell even my friends think I was in the wrong for hitting her (completely ignoring how she was yelling, calling me horrible names, in front of a newborn baby no less.)

So AITA?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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the-moon-files · 5 months

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Linked Universe / GN!Reader - Random Headcanons abt the Chain! :)

Part 1 / Part 2 (ur here!) / Part 3

Sun: Reader (you/they/them)

Orbit: Headcanons-ish

Stars: Hyrule, Time, Fierce Deity, Twilight, Warriors

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: light cussing, & Trigger Warnings: none known.

☆

Hyrule (The Legend of Zelda - OG game, Zelda II: Adventures of Link):

Lost easily, obviously, you know this

What you didnt know was that its very easy to get lost with him

Bc he's so excited/curious for new sights he doesnt give any fucks abt where he is, so it devolves into that "wait, I thought YOU were leading us there?? Then where tf are we??!!" very quickly

Does feel bad he stressed u out smtimes but he somehow manages to get into such wild shit that Hyrule's kinda preoccupied being confused/amazed/finding his way out, or any combo of these situations (once again, usually with you unfortunately)

Is the luckiest when it comes to getting lost or anything to do with "natural" things

Like he heard u rlly like this one fruit? Accidentally gets lost all day and panics all the Links + You until he shows up at midnight with a shirtful of them

("I found a few fruit trees/plants in the woods while wandering! I tried to grab a few for you and before I knew it, it was dark, sorry...")

Likes learning little skills from other people, like learning how to do makeup from Legend, or how to spot collections of rupees the Minish have left somewhere from Four, or how walk on any terrain from Wind (good at walking on a ship, on land, climbing etc)

More of a "sunset" hiker than a "sunrise" one

Likes to do your hair! Whether that be braiding, putting accessories (he handmade shhh) thruout it, or helping with hair maintenance, likes how strangely intimate but domestic it feels together with you (u return the favor ofc)

(All the other heroes are looking at you both like kicked puppies jfcccc🙄)

Time (Ocarina of Time, Majora's Mask):

Gets anxious if he's late to things, likes being fashionably early (or ungodly, when u let him get away with it)

Has absolutely been that meme from Parks and Recreation where he's like "Alright. I'm not mad, I just wanna know. Who broke it?"

(Abt the coffee pot for the camp)

Knowing full and well-

"I broke it. It burnt my coffee for the 3rd morning in a row, so I punched it. I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with war paint on their faces and a moblin head on a stick. ...good. It was getting a little chummy around here."

MF LOVES GOSSIP (wouldn't admit this even at swordpoint)

Wars has absolutely been the person in the meme of:

Wars: "...why would you tell me this??"

Time: "Bc no one will ever believe you."

Wars: ...😦

Has a resting bitch face and knows it, actively cultivates it, scary dog privileges for you,

Type to take ur side in whatever situation ur in, even when Time has no idea whats going on, always, without question <3

The same height as First, (Twi's a close 2nd), and feels most secure when the 3 of you are at the front of the group, but First/Time are slightly in front of you

Like ur literally the person walking their 2 huge scary doobermans/mastiffs one leash in each hand basically 💀

(Once again, Link is deeply comforted by ur voice just over his shoulder/just hearing u even without seeing you)

Very subtly sarcastic, u dont even know he made a dig at you until 3-5 business days later

Likes ur sarcasm more than anyone else's in the group, or even his own lol

Fierce Deity (Majora's Mask):

Likes music, any music (amused at drunk karaoke)

Casually cradles ur arms or back whenever ur falling asleep/tripping/being clumsy near him

Very warm and smoothed calloused hands

Thinks abt what he's about to say so hard/long, that the conversation's moved on by like, 3 rounds/subject changes by the time he's actually ready to talk

Scolds ppl (in like a sentence) who neglect their needs, like sleeping/eating/hygiene

Finds peace in nature, if hes ever upset, u can bet he's already taking a walk by a stream

Likes teaching u/other Links little skills he has, its nice to feel appreciated/needed for something other than fighting or big moments

He falls in love with small moments, like the first time u made them all a dessert recipe from ur world, or repaired First's scarf (for the millioneth time) and bc everyone had gotten their clothes scratched up, everyone needed repairs so most Links were sewing smth lol

Enjoys watching ppl experience smth for the first time, or even himself exp smth for first time

Fierce smiled fully for the first time when you got into the mountain hot springs in Wild's Hyrule for the first time and were super excited

Also the type to hold ur hand while stepping in to make sure u dont fall, or just subtly boost a Link that was abt to fall from climbing smth

Like for being the tallest, he's surprisingly sneaky, the energy of the biggest cat in the house yet somehow also the quietest

Does that thing where someone takes ur hand and like massages ur fingers, palm, wrist and shakes them out kinda for you <3

Twilight (Twilight Princess):

Trips UP the stairs.

Cold start LMAO

ok ill be nice to him,, sike

Easy to bully?? U mean that kindly, he's just such a golden retriever sometimes u cant help urself (tho u make sure to reign it in and not take advantage of it so as not to genuninely hurt him)

Lol likes to "herd" his favorite people, like those dogs livestock farmers have u kno that they say end up herding their owners/their family lol

Like making subtle circles around the Chain, wrapping an arm around Hyrule and teasing him to quietly bring him back into the group before he gets lost,

Tugs on Time's armor to slow him down, mf may be in armor head to toe but he'll outpace all of u 💀

Likes to put his hand on ur lower back to guide u back into the group from whatever scenic thing u got distracted by

(so sue you, ur literally in The Legend of Zelda's Hyrule, surrounded by pretty blondes, why tf wouldnt you be distracted all the time??)

The only time he doesnt herd actively is in Ordon, just subconciously lol <3

Terrible sleep schedule, but sleeps like the dead when he does, has collapsed with a limb on top of you and u couldnt escape

Hard time waking up in the morning despite being country boy, who usually have to do chores first thing in morning on a farm

hates/envious of Wild (up at 5am even on days off?? Foul.)

Runs warm, but complains abt a slight breeze?

Would sleep with no covers if it werent for morning dew

Wishes cats liked him more (its the wolf smell)

Twi has the constant energy of a tall person carefully maneuvering around cluttered/low doorways while someone a head shorter runs by him and bounces off of him

U get onto/scold the Links and he's immediately the first to just sit on the ground, or put down whatever he's holding no matter what he's doing LMAO 😭😭

Keeps his eyes on u too the whole time lol

Warriors (Hyrule Warriors):

Cries over romance novels/dramas

A virgo in all stereotypes of the word tbh

Invented the red-string conspiracy theory board before the red-string conspiracy board existed in Hyrule

Also likes to take care of your hair! (What?? He and 'Rulie don't fight over ur hair, that'd be childish, he's not a foolish boy- Hyrule, hand over the brush.👹)

Remembers the little things abt u type of person, like ur favorite drink, ur favorite stories like tv shows/books even if theyre from ur world, ur favorite clothing pieces like shorts vs. pants, etc.

The only Link who can single handedly claim he could take your closet and dress you in something you'd actually wear.

Honestly once he got the hang of it, would get better at dressing you, than you

(Another domestic thing he adores, picking outfits for u/finding that perfect piece of clothing you've been needing lately)

Born to night-owl, forced to morning-bird 😔

Wars wakes up stiff sometimes bc soldier training is sleeping on ur back, hands to ur sides, laying straight in ur bed, so as to fit into bunks/bedrolls close together

It got better as he was promoted to Captain, so he could have his own quarters but its still a hard habit to shake

One of the few Links who works up the courage to genuinely pitfully ask if you'd mind massaging his shoulders again? He slept badly last night, please?? 🥺👉👈

(Ur so weak for pathetic hurting pretty blonde twinks lol)

The most lowkey abt taking care of Chain, but u make sure to take care of him as a gift back, and you've definitely caught him tearing up abt it 💖

☆

Debated writing smth else first but figured this was easy and short and i started it first so youll have to wait like one more post before more Masc Reader stuff guys 😔

Dw its coming, i havent abandoned u my homies out there 🫂

Let me know what u think in the comments of my slight characterizations here!

Im struggling to conceptualize their personalities so thats acc part of why i started to write smaller stuff like this first! :)

Peace out,

🌙

#lu x reader #linked universe x reader #linked universe x gender neutral reader #lu x male reader #link x reader #linked universe reader #lu imagines #lu time x reader #lu warriors x reader #lu hyrule x reader #lu fierce deity x reader #lu twilight x reader #loz link x reader #jfc is that all of them yet #save me #well not link obv mf is the one making me suffer here 💀#too many mf tags

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athycore · 3 months

Text

“ How dare you…”

Twst wonderland dorm leaders with a daki!Reader(demon slayer) ft: Riddle, leona, Azul.

!They/them reader!

Riddle:

When he first saw you he was starstruck. The most beautiful thing he saw. He bumped to a pole due to staring at you too much. He would describe your looks as “something he has never seen before” or “They are like an aurora…” He found your beauty intimidating, he was scared to approach you. yet he did anyways. Safe to say, he was hooked. Your eyecandy looks, with your confident attitude really had him weak in the knees. He felt like he NEEDED to be by your side at all times…he felt worried that something or someone will steal you away, but he’s confident enough that you wouldn’t replace him. With his tight schedule he tries his best to see you as many times daily or he would go insane. He looks for flowers or rocks that remind him of you and apply magic to make 10x shiner then the average just to get your attention, hes a sweetheart and the very least you can do for him is stare in his direction.

“May i ask your name? You have caught my attention…”

“…ofcourse, i always do.”

Whenever you get together is up to you but he is the most respectful gentleman ever. He opens the door for you, kisses your hands, spoils you..and whatever he can do to make you feel like a goddess. He brings you the most beautiful roses, and treys best cooking just to get a glance at your mesmerizing face. But who can blame him? Everyone in NRC are awake of your presence and have set you as the face of NRC along side Vil.

Leona:

He saw himself in you, he wont deny, your looks are to kill for. Its your attitude that sets him off a bit. But its nothing he cant handle, he enjoys a women who acts like she owns the world because with him, you might as well. With his massive amount of money he spends on it with clothes to suit your pretty ol self. Expensive jewlery, the best food of your life, the silk dress along with a ring customized by him for you only. Although hes lazy, he would always make time for you, afterall, you are his and he is yours. He naps whenever hes with you, whenever you like it or not, he lays his big head on your lap when your doing skin care, or makeup, or anything realated that keeps you busy from looking down.

“I didn’t know which necklace to get you..so i got you all of them.”

“Awh..you didnt have too…(he definitely had to).”

Aside from that hs trusts you and follows your every words. Afterall he is a beastman and they have the moral of women notability that women should always be treated with respect. With that being said, it doesnt matter what you are, or who you identify as, he will treat the best. He believes you as above then everyone so kiss his head and remind him hes by your side.

Azul:

To say he’s obsessed is an understatement. Never in his life has he seen someone like you, gorgeous and cocky? Count him in. He approaches you with the intent to make a deal for you to sing or perform at monstreo but you dont buy it, you arent stupid. He walks you to class, buys you food, anything really just to try to make a deal. Its almost too much but its not like you dont mind, afterall, he is spoiling you without realizing it. He shows up at your dorm, on his knees, making the eels hold the boombox and a poster. Tho while trying to convince you, he fell for you, HARD. He doesnt realize it as he believes its all for business(its not).

“My i believe this should do the trick..”

“No. But i appreciate it!”

He simply adores you and wants to show you off. By doing so he offers everything to get on your good side, free clothes, designer bags, even those expensive figures. He wants you and everyone else to know that he only has eyes for you and that hes the first by your side. Your always there in the lounge of his office, while he works on his paperwork, you do your makeup or whatever and he cant help but constantly take peeks at you for you are simply to beautiful to resist!!

#seventy-five percent ✘#twisted wonderland x reader #riddle rosehearts x reader #riddle x reader #leona x reader #leona kingsholar x reader #azul x reader #azul ashengrotto x reader #twst x reader #twisted wonderland imagines #twisted wonderland

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