Living the Alphabet

Awareness greets me each morning, asking, “How will you walk through today?” Almost always, I answer boldly, listing the connections I want to make or projects I’d like to accomplish, desiring to make an impact in the next twenty-four hours. But, on occasion, I whisper, “I have no idea, “my tank is already nearly empty, and the day has just begun. How do you start most days? Is it amidst joy and…

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Peace

Yesterday, a student in my grandson’s high school was killed when a speeding driver crashed into a car of teenage boys leaving school. A school bus driver performed CPR, but the boy died in his arms. Life is all so fragile. Last night, sleep was nonexistent, as I thought, “That could have been my beloved grandchild.” On the cul-de-sac directly across from my house, more renovation is again taking…

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A Conversation with God

Often, God, I put significant pressure on myself, trying to fix or save or salve wounds that are Yours to manage, regularly disallowing the grace I offer the people I cherish. Much of this comes from my upbringing: wonderful, loving parents but enormous responsibility as the oldest of seven children. During my current reality, I’ve created a pattern of almost always putting my needs last,…

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Self-Love

Wounds—the physical and non-physical—usually don’t simply disappear, but many heal with time, gentleness, and a healthy dosage of self-worth. Sadly, traumas that aren’t of our human bodies—a challenging childhood, being bullied or made fun of (it happens even as an adult), loss of a loved one, or emotional abuse—may carry heartbreak or traumatization forever. I often wonder if those sorrows are…

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Wounds We Don't See

Non-physical wounds usually don’t simply go away, but many can heal with time, gentleness, and a healthy dosage of self-worth. Alas, for some, there seems to be heartbreak or traumatization forever. I often wonder if these sorrows are thrust upon us like anvils, meant to be lessons or higher energy enlightenment. Perhaps we purposively (unwittingly as humans) chose our journeys; maybe it’s a…

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Open Gates

Last evening, sitting with three of my favorite people as the sky melted toward darkness, we shared a simple meal of wine, bread, and lasagna, the bolognese made from a passed-down and tweaked recipe. As dusk settled in, crisp air wafted into the warmly lit foyer as the door opened, a reminder of the ever-changing seasons, as candles lit the space and the music of Ella Fitzgerald became the…

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Fifteen Minutes with God & A Rescue Dog Named Vero

Hi God, Sitting in the library during my morning tea with You, I have much to be grateful for. Vero is in his fluffy bed on the white loveseat next to me—his favorite stuffed animal under his paw—as I sit and look at nature, especially the stunning maple tree and the towering oaks. There is so much serenity on this quiet cul-de-sac.  Staring into my mug, I think about my daughters,…

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Reset

I sometimes forget to dream and think outside the box I’ve boxed myself into—a routine that’s often so predictable that I’m on auto-pilot, unaware—an automaton filling and emptying dishwashers, doing laundry, cleaning, making the bed, preparing meals (which, are not as eclectic as I’d like) paying bills, then often watching TV for an hour before going to bed to start the routine over. Do you ever…

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Metamorphose: transformation, alteration, reshaping

We generally discern “right” and “wrong” based on early life biases. But what if we’re wrong? What if the lessons we grew up with and adopted marginalize others because of how they think, who they love, or the way they see life? What if others see through entirely different lenses or have life experiences we can’t understand? What if we chose to see only through the lens of love? As I think about…

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Bliss & Peace, Stress & Release

Bliss: euphoria, blessedness, felicity, gladness, joy, paradise. Stress: pressure, agony, dread, worry, disquiet, hardship. Your experiences, mindset, and environments color every part of your reality in this life, and how you treat yourself—whether that’s self-flogging and constantly putting yourself last or self-healing and saying “yes,” to the universe—creates a path. I’m not unrealistic…

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Limiting Beliefs

Sitting with tea during my 15 minutes with God this morning reminded me of conversations I had with friends this week. Those ruminations conjured up so many different perspectives—the amazing, the mundane, the obscure, the frivolous, the sorrow-filled and exhausted, and the unbridled joy and fascination in the big picture of life. There were discussions about death doulas and new life, moving on…

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Change & A Different Point of View

Last week I came home from a trip out west. Our first stop was Mount Rushmore—a 60-foot granite wonder that photos don’t do justice to—in the Black Hills of South Dakota. Then we headed to gorgeous Cody, Montana. Being immersed in environments as lush and mostly uninhabited as we visited makes me want to immerse myself in the rest of our amazing country. It was an incredible experience. As I…

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Wanderlust

Have you ever felt a strong desire to experience wanderlust, connect to the larger world, relate to different cultures and experiences, or perhaps see through a lens disparate from your daily one?  Most of us may never have the opportunity to breathe in diverse lifestyles or traverse beyond where we were born. But, even if it meant never traveling outside the region you always lived in, would you…

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Serendipitous Journeys & Lauren

On Sunday, my beautiful, kind, brilliant, compassionate granddaughter, Lauren, graduated from high school. And as I sat in the bleachers watching over seven hundred seniors walk down the aisle and up to the stage, a wave of nostalgia washed over me, remembering the past seventeen years, the overflowing joy and love. I’ve been incredibly blessed to have my grandchildren live near me; many don’t…

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Recollections, Penny Candy & Love

Recollections of decades ago that seem like the distant past, and just yesterday, often dance in my awareness. I hear my inner voice harkening back to what seemed like glory days but, in reality (and retrospect), were often fraught with racism and sexism.  I remember the penny candy store, where we could buy red juju coins, pixie sticks, bubble gum cigarettes (how ironic), and a plethora of other…

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Blue

Recently, I’ve had some days of “feeling blue,” waking up with a sense of sorrow or gloominess, despite this beautiful season of the year. By nature, I’m a glass-half-full human. Being down hasn’t historically been my typical way of walking through life, so my first thought was “figure it out,” which required being in my head instead of intently listening to my spirit. (Ignoring my inner voice is…

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Connecting Life Dots

Years ago, when my husband and I had breakfast at a diner with our daughter, Sara, and our grandchildren, Lauren & Ethan, we’d play “connect the dots” on the back of a paper placemat that Sara would make a series of dots on.   In “Dots and Boxes,” around since the late 1800s, players add horizontal or vertical lines each time it’s their turn. If that line completes a box, you initial it and go…

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