me threatening to kill myself vs. me in any kind of minor danger

by: @desnos

When you dad tries to invalue your own personal thoughts by saying “Well I had much worse when I was A kid!”  🙃 🙃 🙃 🙃

i don’t have many friends anymore

When I was younger, I always attach myself to certain fandoms wanting to be part of their world. I always read those character x reader fanfics to cope. Looking back on my read list a common theme is that the reader has absent parents, an orphan or that they are the antagonists.

I still daydream and read those fanfics to this day It makes me feel like that I can possibly find someone supportive in my life or that what happened to me could be prevented.

Children have a fundamental need to believe their parents will keep them safe. Children are hardwired to know that they are too vulnerable to protect themselves from the dangers of the world and they’re also hardwired to believe that their parents are going to protect them, no matter what. Therefore, when a parent is abusive, the child resorts to believing that is it not abuse, but warranted behavior for their inability to be a good child. Basically, for a child, it is safer to believe they are a bad child than it is for them to believe that their parent is harming them. This is an amazing coping technique that gets many children through horrifying childhoods, however as an adult, it creates severe problems. Therefore, to have happy adulthoods, we must come to terms with the fact that we were abused. This is incredibly difficult work, but for those survivors who can manage it, a much better life is in store. Other effects of abuse include: ● difficulty with love or trust ● poor self-image ● permanent physical disability ● anti-social/violent behavior ● death - suicide or homicide ● drug and/or alcohol abuse ● troubled relationships ● depression ● anxiety ● eating or sleep disorders ● caring or loving too much, which is co-dependency ● withdrawal ● self-destructive behavior

Source: http://www.rdvic.org/index_files/MythsandFactsAboutChildAbuse.htm

Reblogging this will work. Liking this will work. Messaging me will not work. Email me at [email protected]

final exams are next week

I'M ON A DOWNWARD SPIRAL BABY!!!!!!!! 

I’m such A FUCKING idiot to think that people actually give a flying shit about me