nb-octopus-writes
Nonbinary Octopus Writes
AO3: PaigePenn.
Main tumblr: @nonbinary-octopus
[Story Masterpost]
Read this blog in chronological order
Yes, I do have taglists, both general and for specific stories. Please ask for them on my main, for organizational reasons.
This is a blog to collect all the stories I post on tumblr. Everything is tagged with what sort of story it is (for example, #sanders sides and #gt are my most common tags) and, in the case of multichapter stories, the chapter number and the story it belongs to. (Single-chapter stories are tagged #oneoff rather than having chapter numbers, and do not always have a tag for the story title, as there's nothing to group them with.)
In addition to the tagging system, you may notice that I reblog from two different blogs. They are both me, but @nommy-thoughts is my vore sideblog, so if a story is vorish, it'll be reblogged from there (and tagged #noms). Most of my writing isn't vorish, though, so almost everything will be reblogged from @nonbinary-octopus.
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Reblog if you are a fanfiction author and would like your readers to put one of your fic titles in your ask + questions about it
#yes please#preferably do the whole question not just the number#(this means that if I forget to answer in a timely manner I will still know what you were asking in three months and might answer it then)#I know I haven't written anything in a good while but still 👀
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I figured it out!! I am now Proud to present All Three Podfics!
Written by @delimeful, @enby-phoenix, and @bilgisticallykosher!
How Easy You Are to Need original fic.
https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLydFFLWsuApw7c4HMV3Q9mxO-6RH0Fk9U
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youtube
New Podfic time!!
Written by @nonbinary-octopus
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Public Transportation
Summary: Patton has finally convinced Logan to take him to work with him. They take the bus.
Warnings and notes: Mention (twice) of animals being able and willing to eat borrowers. Deceit (Dee) features in this story. Not exactly a Borrowers-As-Pets AU, though adjacent. Got the idea while commuting to work, and wrote a fair portion on the bus. Pretty much all fluff.
Wordcount: 3.7K
[More Stories]
~~~~~
Patton was so excited that he was bouncing on his toes. Today was the day that Logan was going to take him to work with him! Patton had barely been out outside of Logan’s house since he was first given to the human, and Logan had told him so much about his workplace that it was a dream come true to actually get to come. In fact, it had taken a few weeks of occasional requests (frequent enough to stick in his memory, but infrequent enough to not be pestering) to get Logan to agree to it.
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Cookies and Cuddles
Summary:
As Thomas's Anxiety, Virgil can tell when the other sides are stressed, and he's going to do something about that.
other titles I considered include:
Stress, Snickerdoodles, and Snuggles
Gemtle Squish
How to Trick Your Friend into Taking a Much-Needed Break
Stress-Baking, Snuggle Blanket, Sleepy Bois
Worried Boi, Weighted Blanket
Wordcount: 1.7 K
~
Virgil was Thomas’s Anxiety. As such, if Thomas was anxious, Virgil knew why. (Well. Usually. When the anxiety was a nebulous ball of uncertainty, Virgil couldn’t place what was wrong. But he always knew at least as much as Thomas did.) However, things worked a bit differently inside the mindscape. While Virgil could still feel it if one of the other sides was anxious, he couldn’t tell what the source was, and general stress was even harder to place than anxiety.
There had been an uncomfortable ball of nerves in Virgil’s stomach all afternoon. He’d tried ignoring it until it went away on its own, but that hadn’t worked yet, so he went to figure out what was causing it. Most of the tension was a general stress he couldn’t source, but there was an edge of anxiety, and that felt like Patton. Virgil sank out of his room to pop in on the Pop.
Patton was in the kitchen, taking a tray of cookies out of the oven. Janus was also there, sitting on the counter and daintily eating a muffin. Patton stood holding the cookies for a moment, frowning thoughtfully at the counters. They were already strewn with other baked goods, and there wasn’t enough space for the baking tray.
“Why are you stress-baking,” Virgil said.
“I’m not stress-baking,” Patton said distractedly, which explained why Janus was there. He set the tray of cookies down on the stove so he could close the oven and started shuffling the baked goods around to make some space.
“Of course you’re not,” the physical representation of deception said in a gentle tone that nonetheless made it clear that Patton wasn’t fooling anyone. “This is absolutely a totally normal amount of baking to do in a single day. Especially considering that we’re imaginary and don’t actually need food.”
Patton didn’t answer, just continued to move the muffins closer together.
“Plus, I’m Thomas’s Anxiety, and you’re part of Thomas,” Virgil said. “I could tell you were stressed from my room.”
Patton sighed. He started picking at the wrapper of one of the muffins. “I’m worried about Roman,” he admitted. “He’s been working so hard, and I can’t get him to come out of his room and take a break. I thought, maybe, I could tempt him out with a snack, but…” He sighed.
Well, that would explain the rest of the tension, if Roman wasn’t taking care of himself. Virgil nodded and sank out. He popped back into physicality just outside the twins’ room. The door was cracked, so Virgil knocked on the frame instead.
No answer.
Virgil pushed the door open a little further. “Roman?”
Roman was sitting at his desk, back to the door, scribbling away on a piece of parchment with a quill made of a large red feather.
“Roman,” Virgil said again, a little louder.
Still, Roman took no notice, so Virgil went in. He glanced over at Remus’s side of the room, but the other creativitwin was currently absent.
Coming up behind Roman, Virgil put his hand on his shoulder. “Roman.”
Roman yelped, flinging his hands and the quill in the air. “Jumping—! jellyfish!” he yelled, eyes wide and startled. “Haven’t you ever heard of knocking?”
“I did,” Virgil said. “‘Jumping jellyfish’?”
“You startled me,” Roman huffed. “It’s alliterative. Why are you in my room?”
“I am full of stress and anxiety. I want you to lie on me like a cat and squish them out,” Virgil explained. He knew from past experience that if he framed it as helping Virgil, rather than taking a break for his own sake, Roman was more likely to actually do it. They really needed to work on the prince's self-care habits.
But for now, direct intervention would do. Besides, it was true, just not in the way Virgil was implying. He was full of stress and anxiety, and Roman lying on top of him would help get rid of it. It was just that the stress was all Roman's, and Patton's on Roman's behalf, and it would be more the fact that Roman was taking a break, and less the squishing, that would fix it.
Roman frowned. "Don't you have a weighted blanket for that?" he asked, audibly concerned.
"Yeah, well, it's not working for this one."
Roman's concerned frown deepened. "Do you need a better one?" he asked, reaching for his quill again. "I could design—"
"No," Virgil interrupted quickly. "Nope, it's just a different kind of stress this time, that I can't get rid of by myself."
"Oh," Roman said. "And you want me to help?"
Virgil nodded.
"Me… specifically?"
"I don't think it would work with anyone else today," Virgil told him honestly. "Please, Roman. I need you."
That did it. Roman could never resist a friend in need. Honestly, that was part of the problem. But this time, Virgil was exploiting it for Roman's own benefit, so that made it better, right? Whatever. He could let the others debate the morals and whatever of it.
His objective, right now, was to get Roman to take a break and relax for a while.
"Of course I'll help you," Roman said, getting up and taking Virgil's hands. "Do you want to go to your room?"
"Nah. I wouldn't want to steep you in the anxious vibes."
"Mm. Good point." Roman glanced back at his desk. "Well, we shouldn't stay here, or I'll keep wanting to get up and write, and I won't be a good blanket."
No, that would not work at all. "Living room?" Virgil suggested.
Roman beamed at him. "That'll work!" he said, and they sank out.
Virgil rose in with Roman, and as always, it made him dizzy and a bit nauseous. He stumbled and leaned on the prince, waiting for the feeling to subside.
"I've gotcha," Roman said soothingly, wrapping an arm around Virgil's waist to hold him securely. His other hand rested lightly on Virgil's back.
Virgil relaxed, and took a deep breath. It helped. "Thanks."
"Of course," Roman said tenderly. He picked Virgil up, carried him across the room, and laid him on the couch. Then he summoned a few pillows, placing them around him to box him in securely. He even tucked one under Virgil's knees.
"Do you want to change your outfit?" Roman asked, his hand resting lightly on Virgil's calf just below the knee.
Virgil supposed that the zipper on his hoodie might be uncomfortable pressed between them. He swapped it for the Christmas sweater Roman had made him. His neck immediately felt cold.
"Could you make me a version with a hood?" He didn't want to drain Roman's creative energy any more, but it was a very small request. "Just to be a little cozier."
Roman's eyebrows rose a bit, but he nodded, and with the soft whooshing sound that tended to accompany his reality-altering, the sweater had a soft hood. Then he swapped his own princely garb for his own Christmas sweater and a pair of soft red pants with little golden crowns on them.
"Need anything else?"
Virgil reached up, making grabby hands. "You."
Roman smiled, and gently lay down on top of him.
Virgil sighed happily, grabbing a fistful of Roman's sweater in each hand. It was soft, and gave him a nice pressure on his palms, and most importantly, it was an extra assurance that Roman couldn't leave.
Roman summoned a blanket over them both. He settled comfortably in Virgil's arms, and Virgil could feel the tension leak out of his muscles.
"Thanks, Roman," Virgil said. Already, the ball of stress in his stomach had lessened, and if he could get Roman to take an entire nap, it would probably dissolve entirely.
Plus, even if this was mostly for Roman's benefit, the squish of Friend really was nice.
"You're welcome, Spoops," Roman said fondly. He yawned and somehow managed to snuggle even closer. "Anytime."
~ flashback ~
Virgil sank out of the kitchen without a word. Patton looked at the spot where he had been for several long seconds, then looked to Janus.
"Where do you think he went?"
"Beats me," Janus drawled. Patton gave him a look, and he shrugged. "I would guess to go deal with the source of your anxiety."
"Oh." Patton started taking the cookies off the tray, putting them on a cutting board to cool. "I hope he has more success than I did."
Janus hummed. After a bit, he reported, "He's lying by omission."
Patton looked up. "Really? What's he saying?"
"You know it doesn't work that way," Janus said. "Unless I pop in on them, I can no more hear what lies Virgil is telling than he could tell what was worrying you." He tilted his head, as though listening, and stuck his tongue out slightly to taste the air. "Or not telling, rather. Every word he's said is true, but he's left out some valuable details."
“Hm,” Patton said. “Do you want a cookie?”
Janus lifted his muffin, still only half eaten. “After I finish this.”
“Okay.” Baking sheet emptied, Patton took it back to the table to fill it again from the mixing bowl of cookie dough.
A hand in a yellow glove snuck around beside him to snitch a ball of cookie dough right off the tray, and Patton lightly slapped it. It retreated, taking the raw cookie with it.
“I thought you were finishing your muffin first,” Patton scolded, turning around. Janus was still sitting on the counter, eating the muffin with an extremely innocent expression. So innocent that it was obviously put on for Patton’s benefit. He appeared to be leaning on one arm, his hand hidden behind the flour bin. The stolen cookie dough was nowhere in sight.
Patton rolled his eyes and returned to his task. Shortly, he had the tray filled again, and put it in the oven.
“Oh good,” Janus said. “Virgil and Roman are indulging in some self-care.”
Patton’s heart lifted hopefully. “They are?”
“Would I lie to you?” Deceit asked playfully.
“Yes.”
Janus smirked.
“Are they, though?”
“See for yourself.” Janus gestured toward the living room, and Patton turned just in time to see Roman, wearing his Christmas sweater, lean down behind the back of the couch.
“Oh, good.” He pondered the snacks again. “Do you think they’d like some cookies?”
“Probably. But you might want to wait until they get to the movies part of self-care, instead of the nap part.”
That was fair. Patton gathered up the dirty dishes to wash them, humming lightly to himself. “I think, that’s enough baking for today.”
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Chocolate Kisses
For @kieraelieson!
Summary: Remus gives his boyfriends some kisses. (Dukexiety and Intrulogical)
Wordcount: 870
~
Remus walked into the kitchen on the morning of November First carrying a plastic pumpkin overflowing with candy.
“Mornin, Stormy,” he said cheerfully, plonking the pumpkin on the table. A few pieces spilled over the brim. “Last night was fun!”
“Mm-hm,” Virgil agreed. He was watching the coffee pot slowly fill, and clearly wasn’t fully awake yet.
Remus watched him watch the coffee pot, rummaging idly through his candy score. His fingers hit a foil wrapped something with a very specific, familiar shape, and a devious plot sparked in his brain. “Would you like a kiss on the forehead?”
Virgil turned toward him, a bit of surprise showing through his sleepiness, but no alarm. God, sleepy Virgil was adorable. “Uh,” he said. “Sure.”
Virgil took a step towards him, and Remus threw the candy at him. To his delight, his aim was perfect, and the chocolate kiss struck Virgil dead center in the middle of his forehead. It bounced off him and fell to the floor.
Virgil stopped. “Ow,” he said, sounding more confused than hurt. He looked down at the candy on the floor for several seconds, then back up at Remus. Remus grinned back at him. Finally, Virgil stooped and picked it up. “Oh,” he said with a small smile. “I get it.” Leaning back against the counter, he unwrapped the chocolate and popped it into his mouth. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome!” Remus said happily, tearing open a pack of gummy worms.
When there was enough coffee to fill a mug, Virgil did so and sat down across from Remus with it. “Are you planning to make that your whole breakfast?” he asked. Already there were half a dozen empty wrappers on the table, and Remus was halfway through a peanut butter cup.
Remus nodded. “Candy is the best breakfast.”
“Sure.”
They sat in relative silence for a few moments, while Remus finished off the peanut butter cup and opened a full sized chocolate bar with hardly a pause.
“Slow down, you’ll choke,” Virgil said, half joking and half actually concerned. The coffee must be kicking in. Remus slowed down a little.
Logan came into the kitchen, walking right past them on his way directly to the coffee maker. He made a pleased sound at finding it already filled with hot coffee, and poured himself a mug.
“Mornin, Teach,” Virgil said. “Sleep well?”
Logan turned, seeming to notice the two men at the table for the first time. “Oh. Yes, I did. Thank you.”
“Would you like a chocolate kiss?” Remus asked.
Logan hesitated. “For breakfast?” he asked.
“Why not? Hot chocolate is a breakfast drink, so why can’t cold chocolate be a breakfast food?”
Logan considered that for another moment, taking a sip of his coffee. “Fair enough.”
Remus wiggled happily. He put the open end of his chocolate bar in his mouth, holding it gently with his teeth and lips so he could rummage through the pumpkin with both hands. Briefly, he considered dumping it out on the table, which would make a very nice mess and also make it easier to see what he was looking for. But… for this plan to work, he needed a few sneaky moments to get ready, so this was fine. Besides, candy was sloshing over the edges of the pumpkin anyway.
Finally, Remus found another foil wrapped lump of chocolate, and pulled it out triumphantly. He took the chocolate bar out of his mouth with the other hand and beckoned Logan over. “Gimme your hand.”
Logan held it out, palm upward, to receive the gift. In one fluid motion, Remus took his hand, pressing the chocolate into Logan’s palm while simultaneously turning his hand over so it was palm down. Then, carefully, he pressed his lips against the back of Logan’s hand.
“Mwuah!”
He pulled away. There! A little smudged but almost perfect, a cartoon kiss mark, made of chocolate.
Logan lifted his hand out of Remus’s grip, fingers curling around the piece of candy, to get a closer look at the kiss mark. Then he looked at Remus, who still had melted chocolate smeared over his lips. “Gross,” he said finally. “But sweet. Like you.”
Remus’s stomach flipped upside down, and he grinned.
“At least you got a real smooch out of it,” Virgil said with a teasing grin. “I just got assaulted.”
“Oh?” Remus said cheerfully, hopping out of his chair. “Would you like a smoochy kiss too?”
“No, wait!” Virgil said, but it was a giggly protest, not a real one, so Remus didn’t hesitate to give him the kisses he’d oh so cruelly deprived him of earlier. One on the forehead, of course, as that was the promised spot. And then a few more peppered across his face for good measure.
“There!” Remus said happily, stepping back to admire his work.
Virgil looked up at him with surprised, wide eyes, then turned to Logan, who had stolen Remus’s seat. “How do I look?”
Logan looked him over. “Well adored,” he said at last. “The one on your forehead is most prominent, as the amount of chocolate on Remus’s lips decreased with each kiss.”
“I can fix that!” Remus said cheerfully, reaching for the chocolate bar again.
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Not Just the Two of Us
Chapter 6: A Lot of Information
Wordcount: 1.3 K
Summary: Logan likes to talk about his research. Patton likes to listen to Logan, and he also wants to know more. Win win.
Chapter 1: Confession
[Masterpost]
[More of my writing]
~
Virgil and Roman, having done the least before-dinner work, were given the after-dinner chores. Virgil cleared the table, putting the food away and bringing the dishes to Roman, who filled the sink with soapy water and began the washing up.
Every time Virgil brought him a dish, Roman ‘paid’ him for it with a kiss on the lips. They had stacked the plates and gathered the silverware for easier carrying, but after Virgil had carried over a cup in each hand and received a kiss for their delivery, he brought the rest of the dishes over one piece at a time. It took him quite a while to clear the table in this manner.
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A set of commissions for @enby-phoenix of their Fairy AU!
First commission for this au
Commission Info Page
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Penrose Stairs
From Wikipedia:
The Penrose stairs or Penrose steps, also dubbed the impossible staircase, is an staircase in which the stairs make four 90-degree turns as they ascend or descend yet form a continuous loop, so that a person could climb them forever and never get any higher. This is clearly impossible in three-dimensional Euclidean geometry.
inspired by @elsewhereuniversity
~~~~~
By this point you’ve probably heard mention of the penrose stairs in the theoretical maths building. Yes, it’s a single story building. Hence why the stairs which decided to manifest there a fortnight ago seem to be of the penrose variety (or escherian, depending on who you ask). Allow me to offer a warning, freely given: they are not.
Certainly, they give the illusion of infinite repetition, and if you climb the stairs, you will think you find yourself back on the same landing from which you started.
This is not so. Certain things are impossible even on a fairy mound.
If you were to climb a dozen flights, or a score, or even a gross, the landing on which you emerged would still look quite similar to where you began. It might even appear identical. That is where the refraction is centered, after all. The real differences are in the building beyond the landing, and in the world beyond the building.
You might not notice at first, especially if you only traveled a flight or two away from the place where you entered. The places and the people seem so similar to the ones you left behind.
But gradually, it becomes evident that, though similar, they are not the same. Perhaps your best friend’s eyes have always been a periwinkle, but now you realize that they are more of a silver. (But perhaps that can be explained by other reasons. This is Elsewhere, after all, and she may have traded the color.) Perhaps a few words in a novel, or a line in a movie, differs from your memory. Perhaps the sun is red, or there is a second moon in the night sky. (If this is so, you have travelled, far, far away from where you began. Either get used to your new home or else return as swiftly as you can manage.)
If you must travel via the staircase, count carefully how many flights you traveled, and do not forget. The landings do not move, so if you can descend exactly as many flights as you climbed, or climb exactly as many flights as you descended, you will return to the place from whence you began. But each landing is so similar to the next, that if you lose count, you may never find your way back. Do not depend on your friends to remember for you. Ones you bring with you may think you are doing the counting, and ones you leave behind cannot tell you from your neighboring selves. Do not leave something behind to mark your beginning location. You will find an identical (or close enough) object on each landing you pass.
I do not know whether I overshot or stopped too soon. The students here seem to recognize me, but I am haunted by a constant feeling of homesickness, and reality feels a step to the left and a quarter turn widdershins.
Also, whoever built that marble track to harness perpetual motion: I applaud your ingenuity, but that was a terrible idea. The marbles passing by the landing here must be from several thousands of flights above by now, and whatever they’re made of, it is definitely not ordinary glass. I would have dismantled the track myself, except that I feared to touch it, and the creator ought to take responsibility for the creation.
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Secret Shifter
A gift for @cutetinyartist for the @secret-shifters gt gift exchange!
CuteTinyArtist gave three prompts to work with, and I tried to use bits from all of them, but this is mostly prompt three.
Prompt 1: Pretty much anything involving handheld fluff! Giants holding tinies (whether it’s for the first time or the billionth time) is always a great trope.
Prompt 2: A giant finding a tiny and being really excited about it- possibly with accidental fearplay as the giant doesn’t realize how scared the tiny is!
Prompt 3: Size-Shifter accidentally revealing their powers to a close friend who doesn’t know about it (and the friend finding it absolutely adorable/amazing- possibly even leading to a confession of love? Fluffy romance in G/T is something that I absolutely adore)
Wordcount: 3.1 K
Summary: Sam has a secret. A big secret. Or maybe it’s a really little secret…
~~~~~
It had been a perfect day. One of the odd days when Rose and Sam had had a day off in common, and they decided to spend it together. No plans, just hanging out and goofing around. They’d spent a large portion of the morning simply sitting together on Rose’s living room couch and watching cartoons, and now they were in her kitchen, doing their best to make lemonade from its base components.
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Surrounded by His Loved One
Summary:
Remus gifts Virgil a very special buttplug and dares him to wear it through an entire movie night.
(The buttplug is Remus.)
Note: This fanfic is rated mature and explicit. By clicking the readmore and progressing into the fic, you are agreeing that you recognize this fact and are of an appropriate age to be reading it.
Chapter 1: Movie Night
3.3 K
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(this masterpost actually got moved; here is the new link)
Explicit Fics Masterpost
Everything that can be found under the tag #explicit
By clicking any of the links on this masterpost, you are agreeing that you are aware that they contain adult content and are of an appropriate age to be reading them.
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There’s a Snake in My Butt!
Summary: You’ve heard of elf on the shelf, now get ready for Janus in an anus!
Remus talks Janus and Patton into doing some kinky stuff with him.
Wordcount: 3.1 K
Note: This fanfic is rated mature and explicit. By clicking the readmore and progressing into the fic, you are agreeing that you recognize this fact and are of an appropriate age to be reading it.
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Boops Deferred
For @kieraelieson
Summary: Patton wants to boop. Logan’s busy
Wordcount: 841
~~~~~
It took Patton far longer than he expected it to, but he eventually found Logan. He was in the library, sitting on the floor between two towering shelves, hunched over the thick tome in his lap.
“I’m going to boop you,” Patton announced cheerily, skipping up to him. “And there are a very limited number of things you can do to stop me.”
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Mastication Concentration
Summary: Logan usually chews gum while he studies, but today he is out. Remus volunteers to take its place.
Contains: Hard-ish vore (idk exactly where it falls. There’s chewing, obviously, and even rough chewing at points, but the only injuries sustained are bruises). Brief mention of digestion.
Wordcount: 2.9 K
[more of my vore writing]
~~~~~
“Do you have any gum?”
The sides in the living room look up. Logan’s on the stairs, leaning over the banister and looking down at them.
“Gum?” Patton repeats.
Logan nods. “I’m out,” he says. “I’ve already drunk five mugs of tea, I can’t just keep making more. And chewlery is just too squeaky right now, and I’m trying not to destroy any more shirt collars. So, do you have any gum?”
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Virgil the Wee Vampire
Chapter 14: Negotiations
Summary: Terms are discussed and a deal is made.
Warnings/Contains: blood, vomit
Wordcount: 2.7 K
Chapter 1: The Hungry Little Vampire
Masterpost
More stories
~~~
That night, as they flew together, and found some unsuspecting livestock to feed from and a space just big enough for two bats to shelter from the sun, Virgil and Thomas filled each other in on the events that had happened since they’d last seen each other in their cave days ago, and they mourned their family together.
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Not Just the Two of Us Chapter 5:
Further Discussion
Wordcount: 1.2 K
Chapter 1: Confession
[Masterpost]
[More of my writing]
~~~~~
“So,” Patton said. “Polyamory.”
They were all seated around the dinner table now, with Patton across from Roman and Virgil across from Logan. Patton figured it was as good a time as any to get some more information.
“Yep!” Roman answered cheerfully.
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