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inariter · 3 months

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Stay With Me-6

Masterlist:

Stay With Me-1

Stay With Me-2

Stay With Me-3

Stay With Me-4

Stay With Me-5

Stay With Me-6

A million thoughts ran through OA’s head as he listened to Maggie’s words. It felt like his entire world was going in slow motion as he held his breathe. He could feel the panic that coursed through his veins. His gaze falling on (Y/n)’s resting body, trying to wrap his mind around it all.

“We’re still hunting him down but Jubal says you need to stay by her side.” OA knew that Jubal was right, he knew that there was too many conflicts of interest. That he could easily loose his cool if he was involved.

“Okay...okay.”

“We’re going to find this guy.” Maggie told him, in some way to reassure him. But he knew until they caught the guy and he was locked away, there was no way he could relax, much less be assured for the better.

Especially after the information Maggie began to give him, there had actually been two more shootings. One before Maggie gave him a call and another shortly after. Five more victims were added to the tally, all hit in the exact same place. All hospital workers. An organized crime with intended purposes and targets.

“As soon as anything else happens, I’ll let you know.”

“Thanks Maggie.”

Anytime.” They were partners, they had each other’s back. But even now, it was hard to help. “How is she doing?”

“She’s out of the woods now. But she hasn’t woken up yet.”

“She will. She’s gotten through the worse of it.”

“Yeah, that’s what I’m hoping for.” Sighing, OA ended the call, turning his attention back to (Y/n). He sat down next to her bed, holding her hand. The times he wished he could have done this very thing, almost too many to recount. “I love you (Y/n). I want to tell you face to face. I want to ask you on a date or do so much. So just open your eyes, alright?”

----------------

She knew this sight well, a dreary atmosphere that settled over the waiting room. She could see the worried etched on their faces as they all try to cope with their loss. Trying to keep it all together, to not let the tears or any other emotions show.

“She’s in good hands.” (Y/n) said, breaking the silence as their eyes fell on her. Confusion turned to recognition, seeing she was the first to attend to Kristen as soon as she came rolling through the ER doors. (Y/n) started working fast, doing what she could with her skill set before calling the trauma specialist, one more skilled in such matters. Even despite her own capabilities, she wasn’t going to let pride or arrogance prevent them from saving a life. “Our best trauma specialist is operating on her now, the odds are in favor.”

“How can you be so sure?” OA asked, standing up to meet her. He towered over (Y/n) given the difference in their builds. Yet she didn’t cower or stand down. She looked him straight on, a small yet knowing smile on her lips.

“I know how good my colleagues are. But I’m saying this for reassurance, I know you all need some right now.” He could only guess how many scenes she seen like this. How many times she needed to break the news to friends and family.

He knew, she didn’t have to do this. To come out and personally meet them, to try and ease their worries. She probably had another case or had something better to do.

Yet (Y/n) made the time to do this. Just for them. He found it touching.

“Look, you’ll hear more soon. But you all at least should have heard this.” She gave them all a small smile, before beginning to walk away. Tossing OA a snack in the process. “Name is (Y/n) by the way. Keep your head high, cause I have high hopes your friend will be fine.”

As she walked away, her smile grew, thinking back to OA. He easily caught her eye without even speaking. Her eyes had landed on him from the moment she looked at them from the end of the hall. Wondering when would be the next time they could see one another.

Something that would be sooner than she realized. Unaware he happened to be thinking something similar.

Days passed when she went about her daily routine when she was greeted with a familiar face standing in the lobby. Looking a little lost to say the least.

“Oh, agent, what brings you here?”

“Looking for you actually.” Oa smirked a little, twisting the ring on his finger as he walked closer to her. “I just wanted to say thanks. Kristen turned out just fine like you said.”

“And why are you thanking me?”

“You didn’t have to come and talk to us. You didn’t have to do anything but your job.”

“It was nothing. I’ve seen enough people like you and your friends to know they need something. Even the smallest bit helps.”

“Thank you for doing that. It did help. And thanks for granola bar.”

“Anytime.” (Y/n) said, giving him a small smile. Before her pager went on, signaling her that she was needed elsewhere. “Well, that’s my call.”

“Could I take you to lunch?” OA asked, calming his nerves enough to blurt out the question. He wasn’t why he felt as nervous as he did. Nor why he was even at the hospital to begin with. He just knew he ended up here, talking with (Y/n) and now asking her to a meal. His heart beating loud against his chest as he awaited her answer.

“How about dinner tonight? I can go after my shift.”

“Sure...sure. That works.”

“Good, I’ll meet you here at 7 o’clock, tonight.” Her pager once again beeps. “Until then agent.”

With that, (Y/n) ran off to her job, OA watching her as her figure disappeared. Unable to shake the smile on his lips, wondering how or why she even agreed to begin with.

But it was something. It was something for sure.

----------------

Something was wrong, he knew it even before he opened his eyes. Before he looked around the hospital room. His instincts were screaming at him, telling him to move fast, to get up and grab the closest thing near him. And hearing his ringtone stop and go again didn’t help much.

Yet before he could make a move, before he could answer his phone, he heard a gun cock followed by a voice.

“Don’t move or I’ll shoot you both.”

#fbi #fbi x reader #OA Zidan #oa zidan x reader #Maggie Bell #Isobel #Jubal Valentine #Scola #Tiffany #romance #angst

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inariter · 3 months

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Things Change- 5 (Duskwood x Reader)

Masterlist:

Things Change-1

Things Change-2

Things Change-3

Things Change-4

Things Change-5

To be or not to be...that is the question.

To act or not to act. To say or not to say.

If you happened to be reading this, well I’m sure I seem overly dramatic. That I make out every little thing to be such a big deal. That despite being a grown ass adult, I can’t seem to solve any of my problems.

And you’d...you’d be right.

Writing is the only way I can vent any of this, it’s the only way I can feel right. And it’s the only way I can be myself.

Here, I can be anonymous. I can be myself without the worries of being judged. Here, I can be so much more.

Perhaps that’s why I made a career out of it. Why I hid behind my pen name and never do a book signing. Because here, I can find the peace I so desperately search for in my real life.

Even if it is momentarily, which makes it all the more addicting.

And writing this story on forums like these, where I can be even more anonymous, where no one could ever know who I am truly. Or the people...my friends can ever know exist. They could never know the things that go through my mind or the fact I share this. Probably because they don’t know the real me.

It does me great peace to let it out. Now onto the real story, I’ve gone on enough. But you happen to be one of those freaks who get off on things like these, send a message.

-----------

Crippling anxiety was one thing and these constant attempts on attacking her phone didn't help much. A part of her wanted to stay sheltered in the hotel room all day. Keeping an eye out the window for anything suspicious. She wanted to hide under the blankets in some hopes to make it all disappear. That she simple stopped looking, if she left, then everything would go back to normal.

She wouldn't need to be worried about someone trying to access her location or hack into her phone. She wouldn't need to look over her shoulder every minute when she stepped a foot outside in case someone saw through her facade.

She wouldn't need to be afraid that one wrong move on her part could lead to someone else hurt...or that she might be next.

(Y/n) wasn't sure how much more she could take of this. Rather how much more her heart could take.

Time was wearing thin on heart, the years hadn't been kind to her. It almost felt like any moment she could roll over and kick the bucket.

But her mind wander to them, people who she happened to call friends. And who did the same to her. She thought of him and how he would be if she left. The only reason they got this far was because of her, she was like a glue holding them together so they would explode.

Regardless of how she might be feeling, (Y/n) knew she had to press on. Because if she didn't, who would?

Getting her shoes on and getting Jax's leash all hooked up, they started their next adventure for today. Soon someone would know she was in Duskwood, she only hoped this decision would prove to be the right one.

------------

These familiar white walls brought back too many memories, the times she spent in help facilities, in hospitals, and similar settings. Didn't help much with the waves of anxiety that threatened to drown her.

Jax noticed, curling at her feet more and more, comforting her through it. Reminding her to breathe and practice her exercises.

Which was when they called her, leading her through the look alike halls until they stopped at the door. The nurse left her side, leaving her there, wondering if she should go right on in. Or go back to the temporary shelter she once knew.

"Ha, stop being afraid. You're fine." (Y/n) mutters, opening the door. She could see the traces of exhaustion written on face as he looked to her confused. He had a bit more rugged look and his frazzled hair didn't help much. But it was nice to see he was really doing alright, at least besides the wheelchair at his bed.

"And who are you?"

"I'm wounded, here I thought you of all people might be able to recognize me." (Y/n) said, shaking away the nerves that dared to make her hand tremble. She reminded herself to just act the part like she did over their texts. "But I guess that shouldn't be too surprised, none of you know what I look like. You just had an image built in your mind about me."

"Wait...(Y/n)?" Dan asks, almost in disbelief. No one, not even him would guessed that she would travel from her humble abode make it to Duskwood. He doubted anyone would actually come and visit him. Everyone else was preoccupied with something else. Especially (Y/n).

"Took you long enough." She said, sitting down beside his bed. Doing her best to calm the nerves that traveled down to her leg. Trying to now keep the bounces to a minimum. "But enough about me, how have you been?"

"I feel like shit."

"Yeah, you look like it too." Dan laughed, this was a welcome appearance. He needed this more than he would admit.

"How long have you been here?"

"About 2 days. I'm staying in the motel."

"Why?"

"I felt like I had to, given everything that happened. Especially with the attack on Jessy."

"Does anyone else know?"

"No, I plan to keep it that way. Can I trust you to keep my secret?"

"Not even your hacker boy knows about this?"

"Not even him." A smug smirk appeared on Dan's lips, like he felt like he was special. Seeing that (Y/n) entrusted this information to him and not even Jake. He was already feeling even better than before. And no one could ever take this moment from him. He would bring it every chance he had, at least once everything was said and done.

"You really know how to make a guy feel special."

"It's not the first time I came to you. And it looks like I really can trust you."

"I told you so." (Y/n) shook her head, Dan was rough around the edges but he truly did care for his friends. She could see it in his eyes, how they looked her over every so often. Making sure she was fine, noticing her own nerves despite her best efforts. "So what's with the dog?"

"He's my emotional support dog. Helps keeps me grounded."

"Please tell you didn't get him because of us?" (Y/n) almost laughed, there was no hiding the group was much at times. Dan knew it, everyone knew it.

"No, no. He's been around longer than that, helped me through other things." Then she saw that look he gave her. One she knew all too well. Like she was weak and fragile, both were the truth but it didn't sting any less. "I'm fine, at least I manage it. I got Jax and my prescriptions to handle all my issues."

"I thought you were always some naive person. Or someone who couldn't exist." He reached out to her, grabbing her hand. Holding it ever so gently, to not scare her. Dan was more intuitive than she gave him credit. "Looks like I was wrong."

"It's not your fault. I did to myself."

"Well, if you ever need to talk to someone, I'm here. I'll listen and let you cry or whatever girls need to do."

"Thanks Dan. I'll remember that." (Y/n) said, giving him a small smile. She didn't visit him for things to go like this, she wanted to make sure he was fine.

But she was grateful nonetheless things went this way.

#duskwood #duskwood x reader #fanfic #mc #mc x duskwood

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inariter · 11 months

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Timely Reflections

Sometimes things work out in unbelievable ways. It’s crazy that I’m even here on Earth at this time. That I’m doing the things I get to do. It’s a blessing. One I haven’t always seen. Honestly, if you had told me 7 or so years ago where I’d be in my life now, I wouldn’t have believed you.

I wouldn’t have believed any of it. Since then, I thought I wanted to be in college on my way to be some sort to be in the medical field. If anything, I wouldn’t have even believed I would have gotten this far, being an almost 20 year old. I’ve thought my life would have ended awhile ago by my own hands. But as you can see, that never happened. And I’m not even in college now or do I dream of being in the medical field.

Nor would I have dreamed I would be as involved in church as I am. I doubted I would even be the person I am today. A strong Christian who has grown so much in myself and in my faith.

And I write this not because I want to brag about myself but of how God is. And maybe if you happen to be reading this, you don’t believe in Him. Or you have different beliefs, regardless God is awesome. And He is always there He will always love you through everything and never judge you.

It was something I couldn’t believe because I couldn’t even love myself for the longest time. Because I believed in those small whispers of the enemy that let me spiral into a depression and eventually being suicidal. Then, despite hating church, I would still listen at least a bit. And as they preached about how good God was and how He loved each and every one of us, it was hard to believe. Since I didn’t think any one (not even my family or parents) loved me, I didn’t love me, and I doubted even God could love me because I didn’t feel like I deserved it. I didn’t feel like I was enough...that I was worthy.

Yet here I am, learning bit by bit that I don’t have to be defined by my past. I don’t have to be defined by what others think. I see how wrong those whispers are and learning to reject them. And learning just how much God loves His children and what He has in store that is so much better than anything you can imagine.

I don’t really know why I’m writing this but I am. Maybe you’re reading this and you needed it. Because you’ve are going through what I am, or something similar, or you just needed a sign. Whatever it is, know God is there, even if you think He isn’t. And I can help and be there if needed.

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inariter · 1 year

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Things Change-4 (Duskwood x Reader)

Masterlist:

Things Change-1

Things Change-2

Things Change-3

Things Change-4

Things Change-5

--------

Complications, fun little things life likes to throw your way. And you can either embrace them, find solutions, and resolve it. Or you can simply run and avoid it until it has finally hunted you down.

I’ve faced my fair share of complications. Most of the time, I’ve tried to ignore them, to convince myself that I’m fine when I’m anything but. I try to shove it so far down in some hopes it might resolve on it’s own.

Never seems to work no matter how much I try again and again.

And now...now, another one has been thrown my way.

Your heart is a funny thing, it can want so many things at once. It can sway either way, especially when it comes to something called love. Now they say if you’re going to choose between two people, always chose the second. Because if you’ve truly loved the first one, you wouldn’t have fallen for the second.

Now riddle me this, two people have walked into your life. One a wanted individual who can never truly be as open as you want them to be. Who can never be as present as you need them to be. But it’s clear they would do anything to keep you safe and secure, even if it means they risk themselves. In them, you always find a comfort unlike any other. And two, the new person, one who all you’ve heard were these bad things. But when you meet them, they’re anything but. Instead, they can listen for time on end. They make you smile and laugh more than you ever have. They make you feel alive...and they can be there. You know it’s only the start into what may be, feeling there is so much more there than meets the eye.

How I am to choose? How am I to know which one is best?

How do I not let any of this infiltrate this influence me? How can I ever focus on the case on hand?

I don’t know. I don’t know anything anymore.

And nothing seems to help, only worsening it all.

Because here I stand, in the midst of this chaotic spider web. Trapped like a fly, waiting to be devoured.

Knowing that someone I’ve called a friend is out there, wrecking havoc on us all. It’s all coming together, my suspicions are only growing. It’s only a matter of time before I’m caught or he is.

It’s the only way any of this can end.

-----------

And as the night finally quelled down, as the alcohol slowly left her system, (Y/n) could feel her mind begin to clear.

(Y/n) and Lilly able to piece together the puzzle Jake left behind for them both, now it was only a matter of time before it would come full circle. (Y/n) could see her reservations about the newcomer, understand where she came from. While she said water under the bridge, it would take time to really forgive Lilly for what she did.

And of course, how could she forget Dan, texting her out of the blue. She could imagine how worried he was and he had his own unique way of showing it. Something that warmed her heart to see, especially as they weren’t as different as they thought they were. As they were forming a relationship of their own, beyond the pressures they faced.

Leaving her with Phil, the conversations in person and online resonating deeply with her. Unsure what to think now, much less what to feel. Though she wondered if she gave anything away, if Phil might uncover her own secrets and what he may do with said information.

It was all banking on time now. To see how things may or may not unfold.

So it was as good as time as any to sort the mess of her head as everything began to simmer down for once. (Y/n) looked to her phone then to her portable evidence board. Trying to fill in the missing pieces with hypotheticals but her mind kept wandering back to the night of Jessy’s attack.

(Y/n) knew only a few people knew what Jessy was planning that night. Richy by default being the employer, Phil knew bits when he confronted her but he only knew the rumors surrounding (Y/n). The others, well Dan was in the hospital, Cleo and Thomas were breaking and entering, and Lilly didn’t want to be involved.

“It’s all coming together, Jax. It’s funny, how wary some of them were to me. But in reality, it’s a person closest to them that they should be most wary of.”

A few oddities seemed to be blatantly obvious now she had time to have fun and go see the world beyond her home and computer. It was really proved to be helpful.

“I understand why none of them were able to uncover what happened. Because none of them wanted to face the dirty truth. It’s only a matter of time now.”

Now, she had her growing suspicions and it seemed to go back to one person again and again. Whether she wanted to accept it or not was hard to say.

Especially given everything.

(Y/n) knew the others may not accept her suspicions, none of them wanted to think that one of their own could have done this. So for now, she decided to let it play out a bit longer. To see where this road is bound to take her and whether he would move again.

Maybe then, more evidence would present itself. Maybe then, they would be more open to this theory of hers.

Maybe...

-----------

“This isn’t right, none of this is right!”

“That doesn’t matter right now. We have to look out for ourselves, (Y/n). You think they’re going to let us off the hook? You think it’ll be a slap on the wrist if we spill our guts? We aren’t dumb, little kids any more.”

“And this is the right thing? Can’t you hear yourself, right?! I mean, take a look in the mirror and tell me what you see right now.”

Gesturing at young woman, at all they were doing. For what? To cover their hides, to let someone else take the fall, so that they might have a chance at a decent life. She looked at the group, trying to find a single line of reason between them.

But none of them said a word. None of them could even look her in the eye.

“I’m not sure about you guys but I’m not living with this guilt. I refuse to let things go this way.”

“(Y/n)!”

“Come back! We’ll figure something out.”

“Please!”

Their words fell deaf on her ears as she continued pressing on. Finding her way back to the road, to the town she could barely call a home.

Not after everything, especially not after this.

And then, with a thump, things went dark.

Ring...Ring...Ring...

----------

The sound of her phone ringing woke the sleeping woman, for once she had an entire night of good rest. For once, she didn’t rely on her pills to guide her through a night of dreamless slumber. And for once, she didn’t feel like the waking dead.

And when (Y/n)’s eyes saw the caller id, she almost fell out of bed reaching for her phone.

“Jessy? How are you doing?”

“Better, my body still hurts but it’s not as bad as before. It’s also nice to hear your voice, (Y/n).”

“I’m glad. You know, I’m always here for you if you ever need anything.”

“I know. Though I had hoped our date would have ended better. I would have showed you around my house as we toasted to the night. Until, you know.”

“Jessy, I had a fun time. You got my mind off of everything and I can’t thank you enough.”

Though they both went silence, (Y/n) could imagine Jessy’s giddy smile gracing her face, capturing her many features just nicely.

“(Y/n), are you going to keep your promise? Are you going to take me away from this place when this is all over?”

“I am a woman of my word. I’ll take you away if you still desire it.”

“I want you to.”

“Then it shall happen, m’lady.”

She could hear that laughter that was like honey on the ears. Jessy was slowly becoming the best friend (Y/n) missed on having. While others may mistake it as more, (Y/n) knew where they both stood on these matters. At least (Y/n) hoped she did.

But if this friendship would continue growing, (Y/n) could only imagine where else it would go. How more their friendship would grow and blossom. Something she wouldn’t give up for the world.

“(Y/n), thank you. You’ve done so much for us...for me. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to repay you.”

“Don’t worry about it. It’s what any person with a heart would have done.”

“I don’t think so. Which is why I want to ask something of you. I want you to come to Duskwood, I want to see the woman who has done so much for us in person.”

“Jessy...I don’t know.”

“I guessed as much.”

“Look, I’ll think about it. There’s no promises but I’ll think about it.”

“I appreciate it. Talk later?”

“Yeah, talk later.”

Sighing, (Y/n) wondered how much longer she would have to put with this farce of hers. She knew it was only going to be a matter of time before word spread around this small town. Word of the new girl passing through and if they were smart enough, they would be able to figure it out.

And lies were no way to keep up the trust that was being built.

So she would only have to wait until the situation needed it so.

#duskwood #duskwood x reader #fanfic #mc #mc x duskwood

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inariter · 1 year

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Stay With Me-5

Masterlist:

Stay With Me-1

Stay With Me-2

Stay With Me-3

Stay With Me-4

Stay With Me-5

Stay With Me-6

---------

Hospital rooms had become somewhat normal to OA, given the times he needed to visit for on the job injuries. But despite it, he never liked it. Never liked what typically happened as families were torn by grief or how some lost hope with each passing day, unsure whether their loved one would make it through.

Or how so many people he tried to help ended up here as their last stop. Making all his efforts for naught as they didn’t make it...because he couldn’t be there in time to help them.

And as he stood in (Y/n)’s hospital room, his eyes looking over her seemingly lifeless body, he wasn’t sure what to believe. His only reassurance was the machines beside her, their beeps telling him she was still fighting...still in there to come back.

Although it was odd being here with her ex, his eyes glancing back to him as if daring Warren to do something so he could beat his ass right there and then. Then again, on the other hand, OA wanted to hear the story between them. He wanted to know what had happened...wondering if it had to do with what (Y/n) said.

But there was a time and place for that. And now wasn’t the time nor the person for it now.

“You know we weren’t always like this, distant, constantly fighting. Me and (Y/n)...well at one point we were in love. I met her right as she was finishing up medical school and she was still a spitfire as ever. She was always looking out for others, always cared more for them than she ever did herself. It’s why I fell in love with her in the first place, she was always the light of the world. I asked her on a date, though I was sure I didn’t stand a chance and by some miracle she said yes. One thing led to another and we decided to get married.”

“And why are you telling me this?”

“I still love her...I’ll always love her but that won’t change anything. I know I messed up and I can’t be that person for (Y/n)... not anymore.” Warren said, a bittersweet smile appearing. He went to touch (Y/n)’s face, to push away her hair strands that always seemed to get in way though he hesitantly stopped as he was inches away. “You can though, you care for her a lot. You can give her the happiness I couldn’t.”

“I-I don’t know about that. I-”

“Don’t make excuses, you can’t let someone like (Y/n) slip through your fingers. You can’t let the pressure get to you because that’s what happened to me. I let the bad times get to me and I took it out on her. I made excuses and I did things I regret. Man up and tell her otherwise you’ll lose her like I did.”

“How could you tell?”

“You wouldn’t be here otherwise. And that look in your eyes says it all.” Warren said, smirking a bit. He reached into his back pocket, slowly approaching OA. “Do me a favor and give these to her. They’re long overdue.”

OA looked down at the papers knowing exactly what they were; his and (Y/n)’s divorce papers. A part of him was overjoyed, knowing that after all of this, (Y/n) would be his. That no one else might dare sweep in. But seeing that genuine look of guilt and shame in Warren’s eyes, seeing how he stopped himself earlier, and the way his voice cracked as he tried to stop the emotions that dared to well up.

“You should do it yourself. I’m sure (Y/n) will surprise you.”

“I-I don’t think-”

“I think (Y/n) would say otherwise. Though, I admit I did want to punch you but now, you aren’t too bad.”

“You aren’t too bad either. Not many would give someone like me a chance.”

“You can thank (Y/n).”

---------

Her fingers traced the outline of her faint bruises, ones that wrapped around her neck to the ones surrounding her eye, the ones that clouded her to cheek to the many others scattered across her aching body. She stared at herself in the mirror, unable to recognize this battered person before her.

Unable to recognize this broken pieces of the person she was. And she hated it...but if anything she hated herself. For not being strong enough, or not seeing all those warning signs; for not ending things before either of them got to this point.

For not trying hard enough to put him first. To make him feel seen than disregarding him again and again.

For leaving them like this, their lives forever stained by this tragic event. And as much as (Y/n) knew she could blame Warren, she couldn’t. Not entirely at least. Since there was still a part of her who would always love him, since she knew that wasn’t who he was. Since (Y/n) knew she could have done more than letting it pass, to give him chance after chance to clean up his act after he would wake sobbing for the mess he created.

“I’m too kind for my own good.”

“You’re just now realizing that. I mean, come on, (Y/n), you aren’t even pressing charges against him?! Not after all he did.”

“Terrence, I just want us to move on with our lives. I don’t want to go through it all again and I don’t want him to either.”

“He needs to pay for what he did. Or are you going to run back to him after all of this?”

“I’m not too blind to do that.” (Y/n) told her friend, sure the love will always be there but she wasn’t going to run back because of it. She wasn’t going to be in that relationship once more because it was over. A line had been drawn and there was no going back. “I just want to move on, to try and put my life back together. I want to forget what happened and try to go back to some kind of normal. Bit by bit and reliving what happened through a court case...I can’t do that. Not to myself.”

“So you’re going to let him off the hook again? He’s never going to learn, (Y/n). He’ll do that to another woman.”

“But you don’t know that for certain. Terrence, I know you don’t like him now and you don’t know what really happened between us, but Warren is a good man. I’m not going to let this one event brand him as an abuser. I want him to live a good life, to find happiness and love again. One that lets him feel seen. It’s what we both deserve and call me a fool, I just don’t have the heart to go any further. So please, drop it.”

“Fine.” Terrence reluctantly said but as he let the anger and frustration pass, he could see his best friend just needed comfort and reassurance right now. That he had to be there to help put the pieces back together. Because it was clear that going back to what life once was, it was going to be a hard journey. He could see the broken girl in (Y/n), one that wasn’t ready to open herself back up to the world.

He could see the walls that were beginning to rise, something he’d never imagine for her. So everything else didn’t quite matter, not now. Even as he approached her, Terrence could see her figure flinch away.

“It’s be alright. We’ll get through this together and I promise no more judging.”

“Where would I be without you?” A small smile appeared, one they both missed after days of it missing.

---------

“It’ll take time but she’s going to make it OA.” Terrence said, placing his hand on OA’s shoulder. Giving the agent a small smile as they watched (Y/n)’s chest rise and fall, hearing those somewhat comforting beeps letting them know she was still there.

They could both rest easy now, knowing that soon enough, (Y/n) would be right there back in their lives. Like she never even left in the first place.

“Thank god.”

“Believe me, we both can finally rest.”

“When do you think she’ll wake up?”

“In the next few days. You’re welcome to stay or you can go home and rest a little. We’ll call you as soon as she’s awake.”

“I want to be there when she wakes up.”

“I’m sure (Y/n) would like that. I’ll get some pillows and blankets then, and OA, take care of yourself too. (Y/n) wouldn’t want to see you worried because of her.”

The silence was interrupted by his phone ringing, interrupting a rather happy moment for OA. But it meant they were possibly one step closer to knowing what really happened.

“OA, there’s been another shooting...and this goes deeper than we originally thought.”

#fbi #fbi x reader #oa #oa x reader #Maggie Bell #isobel #Scola #Jubal Valentine #tiffany #fanfic

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inariter · 1 year

Text

Things Change-3 (Duskwood x Reader)

Masterlist:

Things Change- 1

Things Change- 2

Things Change- 3

Things Change-4

Things Change-5

--------

Breaking points, we all have them and sooner or later we’ll all bound to reach it. We’re all human after all, we all go through physical and mental exhaustion. We all are bound to burn out. We’re all bound to break down.

It’s human nature.

It’s how we live and die. Our bodies bound to slowly give up on us until it could no longer hold us.

Same could be said about our minds. After so much torment...after so much infliction the world and us put ourselves through, it can only take us so far before it crumbles under all the pressure. And then we are only empty husks, unable to continue. Then all we want is for it all to end. For all the pain, all the hurt to simply end and we would look for any solution. No matter how grim it may be.

It’s simply life. We break down, try to rise from the ashes, only to fall further into an abyss with no one out.

And here I find myself at this familiar cliff. Here I find myself torn into so many directions as the pressure only grows. My heart and mind screaming in unison while my stubbornness fueled by feelings pushes them further.

Leaving me to ask: “How much longer? How much longer till this all goes to hell? Till I find myself in a place of no return?”

But if I’m really being honest, more than I ever I ask this: “Would they be there to pull me back from the edge? Would they jump into the abyss after me? Would they act on all the words and promises they made thus far? Would he do it?

Or

Would they leave me to die? Casting me aside all for her, disregarding all of what I did.”

I can only question it and hope for the happy ever after as my mind further degrades.

--------

“It’ more beautiful in person, don’t you think Jax?” (Y/n) asked him, though he was more preoccupied in the small fish that whisked around. His eyes following them, as he waited for his moment to strike. Though all that happened was him getting soaked as the fish fled from him.

Laughing a bit, (Y/n) turned to the lake Jessy took her time to show her. Despite everything, Jessy wanted to make her feel better, to make her feel seen as something more than a key or a great detective in this seemingly wild goose chase. As where one lead ended, it only lead to more questions than answers. Leading them in circles until another thread of information caught their eye.

But for a bit, as her and the red head chatted, as she was shown the almost familiar sights of Duskwood, she felt a feeling of peace. A feeling of belonging to a group that would actually care for her in the end than viewing her a means to an end.

At least for a moment, it was enough.

“We should take more vacations, when there wasn’t some kidnapper on the loose or lives were on the line. I heard it supposed to be healthy.”

Though (Y/n) only found him the same position as early, seeing some brave fish daring to return. But she knew the lab who whole-heartedly agree.

The two had been together for years when her parents deemed it was time to deal with the issues at hand. When they knew they could longer hope time would heal her wounds or that (Y/n) or any of them could ignore the elephant in the room.

And a part of (Y/n) wanted to think that this might help resolve some issues. A part of her still held onto the hope that everything might be able to go back to normal...that she might be able to finally be fine after years and years of this inner turmoil. Especially as her thoughts went to Jake.

A kindred spirit in a sense who could get her own inner darkness. Who could understand the anxiety that filled her bones or the way she chose to hide from the world. Though doubts and fears still lingered, (Y/n) couldn’t help but feel comfort in their chats whether it was sharing mere information or making awkward small talk.

The years of social isolation obvious between both but they made it through together. Making it seem like it was just right in the end.

Because Jake made her feel like she was normal. That nothing was wrong with her, that she could let herself open up to others. To let herself feel all these emotions again and that they weren’t wrong. No matter his own reservations. Opening up her phone, (Y/n) skimmed through their messages, a smile couldn’t help but appear as felt like she was on cloud nine.

Jake:

Please don’t worry about me, (Y/n)

They won’t find me

How can you be so sure? How do you know they won’t outplay you or..

Jake:

Because it would separate you from me

Promise me you won’t get caught. Promise me that this will all end in no time. I need some reassurance, Jake.

Jake:

I promise, (Y/n). As long as I’m here, you’ll be safe. I’ll survive because of that reason.

“Thank you.”

--------

Tempted as (Y/n) was to head back to the safety of her hotel room, she couldn’t but want to stop by the notorious Aurora, in other words meeting Phil. A man she’s heard so much about, hearing about him from their perspective but never his. She was always curious about who the man really was.

And she was just about to get her wish. Especially as she sat down at the bar.

Phil’s eyes instantly lit up as he saw someone like her take a place at his bar. He took special attention to her, immediately asking what he may assist. And instantly getting to making her favorite drink while her phone began to buzz incessantly.

“It seems like you’re quite a popular lady.”

“Sometimes I wish I wasn’t.”

“What pretty lady as yourself wouldn’t want attention?”

“When most of the time, I’m the only one who can do anything. As much as I’ve grown on this new group of...friends, sometimes it feels like I’m only a means to a end to them.”

“I know a group just like that. To them, all they could ever care about is their little group. Oh, we this or we need that, they never seem to care about the world outside their little circle. Sometimes I wonder how they’ve survived this far considering all the stupid things they’ve done. I don’t even think they know much about the real world, they never think they’re will be consequences for the action, believing they could get away with anything with a simple apology. Especially with Hannah missing, they’re been unbearable.”

“Heh, looks like you got some things you need to vent too. Want to join the party?” (Y/n) asked, raising her glass to Phil. She could see that smirk of his only grow, seeing he wasn’t as bad as the tales the others spun. It was all a matter of being on the right side of things.

Maybe that’s why she had gotten this far where they may have fallen short.

She was a ghost, able to get in and out of places seemingly unnoticed. Barely leaving a trace behind. Fitting in where she was needed and filling the holes in mere theories with facts.

Even now, (Y/n) found herself able to coax more information than Cleo or any of them had previously been able to. She really wondered where they would be without her.

“I may have stepped outside the duties of a bartender. Usually I’m the one that comforts others or listen to their woes.”

“I don’t mind, I happen to be a great listener too. As long as you’re fine being open with a complete stranger.”

“Have we met before? I have a strange feeling I know you somehow.”

(Y/n) only smiled, taking another sip of her drink. She let Phil only wonder about it, letting the curiosity eat him up. An alluring glint in her eyes that made Phil only draw closer, feeling a connection of sorts. He simply couldn’t put his finger on it.

“Mysterious, I like it. You aren’t from here, are you?”

“What makes you think that?”

“I know about everyone in Duskwood, none of them are like you. They’re all so bland and predictable. While you madam are something else entirely.”

“Well, you are right. I’m not from here, think of me as a wandering artist, trying to clear my mind. And you, kind sir, what’s your own story.”

“A guy who managed to get into the good graces of the previous owner. Left with my very own bar to do as I liked.”

“Interesting. And your name?”

“Phil. And yours?”

“A lady can’t give away all her secrets.” Maybe it was the alcohol talking or her old self reappearing. Just like she always wished she did. But being here in this bar, talking with Phil, brought something out of her. He had this unique air about him, almost similar to Jake’s that made her feel that everything was just right. That she could talk to him about anything without feeling she was being judged. Things were simply easy. “Course if you managed to figure it out on your own, I’ll be happy to oblige with any questions of yours.”

“Well then, beautiful, that is a challenge I will accept.”

With one last swig, (Y/n) finished her drink as she fished a $20 bill from her purse. Placing it in Phil’s hand, she felt as his enclosed around it. Their eyes meeting, each tempting each other to move. It was tempting to do something else but until other things were sorted, it would have to wait.

At least until she got the answers she wanted.

“I’ll be back, don’t miss me too much.”

Slipping her hand away, (Y/n) gathered her things and waved goodbye to Phil. Her heart beating crazily as untangled Jax’s leash. One look at her phone signaled that her assistance was needed once more. This time, from an unlikely source.

Things were growing complicated and she wasn’t quite sure where else this road may lead. Else the obstacles to come.

#duskwood #duskwood x reader #fanfic #mc #mc x Duskwood

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inariter · 2 years

Text

Things Change-2 (Duskwood x Reader)

Masterlist:

Things Change-1

Things Change-2

Things Change-3

Things Change-4

Things Change-5

Secrets: dirty little things we like to lock away in the depths of our mind, wishing they never see the light of day. We all have them, some really only superficial, others not so much.

So as I stepped into this dreary yet beautiful town, I could only imagine the buried secrets they hid. I could imagine all those little things they kept shoveling away, desperate that nothing would ever come undone. That this image they all tried to build was all anyone passing through ever saw.

And the same could be said about the people themselves. Each of them with their own dirty little secrets. It was something I learned through them as they could only try to prevent things from unraveling...to keep themselves from unraveling further than they already were.

Course that’s to say I’m not completely being honest myself.

Like I said, we all have our secrets. Mine are so buried that I barely know what is a lie and what isn’t.

Though all I can hope is that when they do finally come out, they all forgive me for the things that happened. Maybe then I can forgive myself too.

--------

“So far, so good.” (Y/n) muttered, collapsing on her bed for however long this stay of hers would be. Sure, she had paid Mrs. Walter a week’s stay but who knows how these things go. A day turns into a week, a week into two, and soon an entire month has gone by before you know it. It’s happened to (Y/n) before, more times than she like to admit to. Still, she was prepared if it came to it.

Well, at this point, (Y/n) was prepared for about everything that was bound to come her way.

“Glad she let you in, Jax. Not sure how I would fair without my emotional support dog.” (Y/n) laughed dryly, petting the dark haired lab. He had been by her side for years, especially when her episodes were getting worst by the day. Wearing her down until there was barely anything left to give to the world and then Jax, by efforts of her family and friends, came along beginning to give meaning back to everything. “I’m going to need you in the days to come.”

He let a small bark out in response, warming her heart and getting rid some of the anxieties that plagued her.

“Yeah, same here. Now we best get to work. This case isn’t going to solve itself, now is it?”

--------

“I’ve never seen you around here. May I ask what brought you to Duskwood?”

Ms. Sully, I presume. (Y/n) thought, she could guess that the most nosey person in the town would be the one and only gossip mill herself. Although the young woman had hoped that maybe she could go undetected a bit longer, she knew it was only a matter a time that word would get around about the new face in town.

“I’m taking a road trip across country and just happened across Duskwood. It caught my attention right away and I knew I needed to stay here for a little.”

“Well, many don’t give this town a chance. It warms my heart to hear that though.”

“I don’t get why not, it’s a truly beautiful town. I’m looking forward to what else there is to see.”

“I’m sure you will find this is a good town...despite what has happened.”

“Oh? If you don’t mind me asking, what’s happened?” (Y/n) asked, acting the part of a curious visitor. Though she wondered what else Ms. Sully would unintentionally slip through.

“I wouldn’t want to ruin your trip.” Ms. Sully stands there contemplating for a moment. “But between me and you, a young lady like yourself went missing a few days ago and another was found dead. It’s a saddening thing to know someone from this place could do something so horrid.”

“I could only imagine.”

“You should keep an eye out young lady. I wouldn’t want something else to happen.”

“Well thank you. I’ll look out for myself.”

Heh, the town’s gossip mill, the name does her proud. At least that crosses one name from my list.

(Y/n) mused to herself, continuing her walk through town. The pictures didn’t do it justice, she only hoped to one day walk these streets with Jessy and all the others in tow. She hoped that one day all of this would be behind them, that the man behind it all would eventually meet his inevitable doom, that Hannah would be back in a safe haven, that things might actually be normal. It’s not like the first time (Y/n) hoped for that, not after all the therapy and counseling, the pills on pills to help with night terrors, insomnia, endless waves of anxiety, along with all the other problems that plagued her life.

Job hunting was a nightmare when stepping one foot out of her house sent her crashing down. A social life was but a pipe dream when the paranoia set in.

For awhile, all hope was lost until writing found its way into her life, letting her own dreams come true as she poured her heart and soul into book after book.

Things got better for a time...

A small buzz took (Y/n) from her thoughts as she reached into her pocket to see her phone going off as it did from time to time. This time it was a conversation between Phil and Jessy regarding Thomas Cleo’s little break-in attempt the night prior. Only spelling more trouble for the group if it went undealt with.

Darting into a small alleyway, (Y/n) got to work, mediating situations as she often got used to nowadays. Texting Thomas to go on and apologize before things progressed any further, she guessed the least that would happen would be a ban, but at this point anything was better than getting the police involved. It would only raise unnecessary questions, ones that she could only imagine would lead straight to her.

Resulting in more unwanted pressure than she needed.

And by the looks of it, Thomas didn’t want that outcome either as he rushed off to drag Cleo along to end this fiasco.

With a sigh of relief, (Y/n) slid down to the floor. More buzzes coming from her phone, more things to deal with.

“I wonder how much more I can deal with this. Eventually they all have to realize, I’m only human in the end. I can only deal with so much before I break down too.”

#duskwood #duskwood x reader #fanfic #mc #mc x Duskwood

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inariter · 2 years

Text

Stay With Me-4

Masterlist:

Stay with Me-1

Stay with Me-2

Stay with Me-3

Stay with Me-4

Stay With Me-5

Stay With Me-6

------------

Trigger Warning:

sexual assault/violence, domestic abuse

------------

“Please tell me she’s fine.” OA asked as soon as he barged through the hospital doors. The lead they had didn’t seem to equate to much of anything, not unless they wanted to go to a list of hundreds and find a crimson red flag among the others. Considering the shop wasn’t always true to its nature. And for now, they were left fishing for other leads, sifting through hours of camera footage to find something. And hearing the news, he couldn’t be anywhere else but here at this moment.

Because if it were the last, and he wasn’t here, OA would have never forgiven himself for it. Not in a million years.

“OA, you should calm down before I tell you anything.” Terrence said, leading OA to a nearby chair. It was the best Terrence could do before OA before getting down to the details. It was what he always did. “Look before you go accusing this or that, we did everything we could. We’re all family here at this hospital and we would move heaven and earth to make sure (Y/n) would come out alright.”

“Just tell me already, Terrence. I have to know.” OA braced himself for the bad news to come. He found it almost funny since he always thought the roles would be reversed, that it would be him on death’s bed while his friends broke the devastating news to his family...and of course (Y/n).

“(Y/n) had lost a lot of blood by the time she came in. She was loosing more by the second and though we were lucky the bullet didn’t do too much damage. While we were able to stop the bleeding, the damage had already been done and she slipped into a coma. We’re doing what we can for now, the rest all depends on (Y/n).”

“What are her odds?”

“Well, from a medical perspective, it’s hard to say. The chances are a bit low but we both know (Y/n). We both know how much of a fighter she is, I’m sure you remember that bar fight. She won’t back down ever and if I was placing bets on who could get out of this, it’s (Y/n).”

OA cracked a small smile but honestly, he wasn’t sure what to think.

“If word changes, you’ll be the first to know. But in the meantime, if you need anything just call.”

“Who is her power of attorney?”

And for once, Terrence grew silence, the smile that he once had faded. OA had a feeling Terrence knew something he didn’t. Something about (Y/n) that she had yet to unpack for him.

“That’s a bit more complicated. Because the last person we have on file, it’s not someone I want to call up.”

“Who is it?”

“(Y/n) always meant to tell you about him, OA. He was a bastard of a man who almost ruined (Y/n)...he almost destroyed her chances at ever being in a relationship. Well to ever be her happy self again, he tore her apart piece by piece until here was almost nothing left.” OA could feel his blood begin to boil even hearing this vague description. Wanting nothing more than to hunt down the man and punch him square in the face for even daring to hurt the kind hearted woman. But he knew it was best saved for another time, when lives weren’t in the balance. “ And then, you came along OA. I wasn’t sure at first about the whole thing but I saw the way (Y/n) looked at you and you looked at her. I saw how you lit up her world every time you stopped by the hospital or when you texted. You showed her that it was alright to open herself up and love again. You showed her how to be happy again. I’m as grateful for you as (Y/n) is.”

------------

Beep! Beep! Beep!

Her eyes fluttered opened to a scene before her. It was early morning, the sun’s rays flooding through the blinds casting light into the room. There she lied, a smile adorned, as she took in the sight before her: OA sound asleep by her side, soft snores escaping his lips. He looked so peaceful...so handsome and perfect, she could barely even fathom being here. Despite in the sounds of a car going on, nothing really could break this moment.

(Y/n) reached her hand eye, her thumb tracing his well defined features. Shaping the sculpture of a man that laid before her.

“How did I get so lucky?” (Y/n) murmured, planting a kiss on his forehead. Only to hear a small chuckle.

“I should be asking the same thing.”

The two giggled before embracing one another, their lips gently meeting as they danced in harmony. Their hearts skipping a beat in unity as they cherished this moment forever. A memory imprinted on their minds, like they framed it up high. They never wanted to leave this room, they never wanted to leave this moment since it was simply perfect.

Her lips curved into a smile as they parted ways but as she opened her eyes, hoping to see OA, they only opened to see him.

“Hello darling.”

And the heart that once beated so fast, now stopped. A cold chill ran up her spine as panic began to rise. She could feel her trembling hands trying to push him away, trying to get him off her.

“Now, now, we’re just getting started. You’re the one who wanted this after all.”

“N-No. P-Please s-stop.”

“You can’t deny me, darling.”

Goosebumps rose as last night’s leftovers threaten to rise. Feeling her shaking hands bound over her head, feeling as his other hand explored her every inch, she just wanted it to stop. Yet despite her pleas he continued as he pleased.

Just like he had done over and over again.

It wasn’t always like this. It wasn’t always like this toxic push and pull, there were once happy times. They were both happy once upon a time. Until those darker parts began to show and take over. She tried to leave numerous times but it first began that he promised to stop but when it didn’t, when she was serious this time, things turned ugly. Leaving her trapped in a place she once called home, unable to call for help even if she could.

Only hoping that soon someone would realize that something was wrong...that they would come crashing through that door soon.

But it never came.

“Stop crying already!” (Y/n) could feel the burning sensation before his hand even made contact with her cheek. Tears streamed steadily down her face as she cried out for help that would never come. “Come on, (Y/n). I can’t be the only who’s trying to make this work. We were happy.”

“Then you changed.”

“I’m...I’m not the bad guy! Stop painting me as one.”

“Stop acting as one. You think the man before me is the man I fell in love with. You think he’s the one I wanted to marry, where I would say ‘I do’ a thousand times over, because he’s not.”

Another hit made her neck twist uncomfortably as sobs escaped her lips. Especially feeling him beginning to push in without a care of what she felt. And if that wasn’t enough, she felt his hands tighten around her neck, squeezing more and more tightly until breath could longer come in.

“This isn’t my fault.”

Feeling her life begin to drain and she so desperately clawed at his arms and face. But it was only grabs to keep on living in this miserable reality.

If only that would have happened, seeing this was his tactic again and again. And by the time she came to again, he apologize continuously, taking care of her like he did back then.

“(Y/n)!”

Hearing that voice, hope returned as she tried to shout with all her might. But her guardian angel found her with trying, punching her shell of a husband without hesitation while cradling her ever so gently.

“It’s going to be alright. Don’t worry, I’m going to take care of you. And that bastard won’t ever lay his hands on you again.”

------------

“So after all these years, she finally needs me again? Funny how things work out, huh?”

OA held his tongue for now but hearing the way he talked about (Y/n), like she was still his...like he belonged to her despite everything. OA wondered how he even managed to get a woman like (Y/n) in the first place. Better yet why he would even think about harming even a hair on her.

“Warren, so help me God, one wrong comment and I’ll beat your ass again. Put your that massive ego aside and do something good for (Y/n). You owe her that much after all the hell you put her through.”

“Hey now, I still love her as much as I ever did.”

“Then prove it. Make the right decision, make sure she survives. Better yet, after she does survive, let her wake up to you finally signing those divorce papers. She deserves to finally be happy, Warren. So make the right decision.”

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hey everyone! Thanks for the support, I really appreciate it. I wasn’t even sure about posting this story but it’s hard not to seeing the idea just wouldn’t stop running through my head. Anyway, I do try to post as often as I can but I do have another story on this platform and I have other stories on other platforms to keep up with. Not to mention school, work, and other things, I’ll try my best though! Same to replying to others as it depends on when I check here. Anyway I hope you all are doing well and I have a few others to tag for their support:

@mrspeacem1nusone @thegreat-annamaria @masset-fotia @mjaudrey

#fbi #OA Zidan #oa zidan x reader #Maggie Bell #Jubal Valentine #isobel #angst #romance #Scola #tiffany #fbi x reader

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inariter · 2 years

Text

Things Change-1 (Duskwood x Reader)

Masterlist:

Things Change-1

Things Change-2

Things Change-3

Things Change-4

Things Change-5

--------

Things change, people change, everything changes eventually. Maybe it’s the result of one lousy mistake, maybe it’s because someone else decided to finally act, or maybe it’s the cursed fate on your life that just reels you right back. Hard to say in the end, especially when you’re pulled into a chaotic who dunnit between a group of strangers, their even stranger town, a psycho hiding behind a legend, and an awkward yet charismatic hacker. It’s like something out of a thriller film, something that sounds so impossible...

Yet here I find myself caught in this dangerous web, playing this twisted game. Questioning my every move...myself even. Wondering if there’s something I’m missing, if my memory isn’t as reliable as I thought it was or if there’s a secret about me that I don’t even know. Unsure whether I’m trusting the right people, if I’m letting them in all too quickly, especially him.

But if anything, uncertain what awaits me...or anyone for that matter next? Pondering if we’re the next one to go. Or if fate has some other end for us?

So many thoughts ran through her head, unsure what to do or even think of it. All these sleepless nights, all these days fueled solely on coffee and energy drinks and yet (Y/n) still wondered how much it got her.

Even as she gazed at her little evidence board, all the little connections, all the little clues, everything they’ve found up till this point pinned to this board of hers and yet it didn’t seem they were any closer to finding Hannah or the person behind this. And he just seemed to getting braver and braver with each passing second.

Those supposed empty threats now escalating into actual actions. Jessy seemed to be the first victim (assuming what happened to Dan was a mere accident), that image of her laying helpless on the ground still burned in (Y/n)’s mind. And she damn well knew things would only get worse from here.

She could only imagine what else he might do. That very though just drove her crazy.

“Come on (Y/n), think. What the hell are you missing?” (Y/n) pondered aloud, it was just like when she actually sat down and wrote the stories that roamed her mind. Just waiting to bleed out onto the paper, sure these events were inspiring her to pound out a book right here and now but she restrained herself from writing too much. Allowing only bits and nothing more, after all lives were at stake and this little investigation of hers required her full attention. Especially with Jake being rather disposed at the moment. “What’s the thing that’ll bring all this together? What’s his motive? Why Hannah? Why me? How am I the key to all of this?”

Even as questions swarmed her mind, desperate for any answer that’ll appear from the blue, nothing came. Buried memories she wished to resurface never would, no matter how much (Y/n) tried to unveil them.

“Fucking hell!” Papers went flying in her already messy study, scattering everywhere as an idea came to mind. A stupid idea yet the only one she could think of.

(Y/n) already knew Duskwood was only a couple hours from her and it’s not like the idea hadn’t crossed her mind before. She had it all planned out. She had the entire act she’d put on stained in her memory. Even what she would do in Duskwood without anyone ever knowing it was her.

(Y/n) just never thought it would come to pass, not like this at least. In her mind it would simply be a surprise to all her newly found friends after everything eventually passed. But now..it seemed like the only option.

After all, things change, sometimes without even knowing how much or how quickly they do.

Sighing, (Y/n) felt Jax brush her against her hand, worried that something was wrong; knocking her away from her thoughts. (Y/n) smiled at her lab, petting him to soothe his uneasy heart while solidifying what she had to do.

Even if she were to regret it later, (Y/n) knew the deed had to be done.

It had to be done, else she wasn’t sure how much longer she could sit back in the comfort of her home while all of them were thrown to the wolves.

And for now it’ll just be her little secret, among the many others she kept locked up.

#duskwood #fanfic #duskwood x reader #mc #mc x Duskwood

54 notes · View notes

inariter · 2 years

Text

Stay With Me-3

Masterlist:

Stay With Me-1

Stay With Me-2

Stay With Me-3

Stay With Me-4

Stay With Me-5

Stay With Me-6

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“Bullet wound, straight through the chest. We’ve been able to keep her stable but BP is decreasing. Breathing is shallow, heart rate is steady though slowly increasing. She got lucky, it doesn’t seem like it kicked an artery or damaged too much.”

She could feel herself go in and out of consciousness, catching a few select words here and there, watching as they pushed her past blinding lights. So many voices echoed through her ears, familiar voices of her colleagues. Worried out of their minds.

A part of her wanted to reach up, tell them she would fight as hard as she could. That’s as much as (Y/n) could promise, knowing damn the things that could happen, the things that could go wrong within a moment. Even with the easiest surgeries, something could always goes haywire, nothing was quite set in stone until they all see it through to the end.

“You’re in the best of care, (Y/n). Stay strong and come back to us.”

Terrence, she knew his voice too well. The two been together since their residency, best friends who were always there for one another and eventually came as a packaged deal for any hiring hospital. Neither could imagine not working alongside each other.

“I don’t know what I will do without you. And I know damn well he can’t either, we both do. I’m not sure how he will go on if you die.”

Course, how could she forget OA. His sorrowful eyes still stained in her mind, the tears which pooled in his eyes as he tried to keep her heart beating a minute longer. His worry so endless for her, checking every day no matter how tiring his day was. Making sure first and foremost that she was fine before even thinking of himself and the exhaustion that battered his body.

Even on their precious days off, spending that oh so special time with one another, OA ensured it was just them in their own little world. Ensuring that nothing else would dare intrude. (Y/n) could remember his gentle touch and his attentive behavior, making sure she was always as comfortable as could be. (Y/n) often wondered how she got so lucky to find a guy like him. She wondered what would had happened if Kristen never got hurt in the first place, wondering if they would have met on some other occasion or if this was just one in a million chance.

“So if you can do anything, survive this for OA and tell him just how much you love him.”

And the only thing (Y/n) hated was how long she waited to utter those words. These months that she cherished so and still she waited only till now..only for something like this to happen to finally speak what’s always been on her heart and mind, though mainly her heart.

All she wanted now was to go back in time and tell without any of this happening. Because in the first time in awhile, (Y/n) felt like she could let herself love again, to open her heart up again to love someone else as much as she loved OA. After her last relationship, after allowing herself go through so much pain and heartache, (Y/n) was sure she was done with romance until OA came along. She never told him just how much he did for her.

(Y/n) just wanted to see OA again and embrace him like she was going to lose him.To kiss him until they both lost their breathe, to do so much more than she did. To whisper how much she loved him again and again. To tell him so much, to do so much more than what she did.

“Dammit! She’s crashing.”

“(Y/n), don’t you dare die on me! I swear to God I will beat your ass if you do.”

She only hoped she still had time left.

“Get OA on the phone now! If worse comes to worse, he needs to say goodbye.”

#fbi #fbi x reader #oa zidan x reader #OA Zidan #Maggie Bell #isobel #Jubal Valentine #angst #romance #Scola #tiffany

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inariter · 2 years

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Sometimes all you want to do is scream and shout and let it all out. To let all those emotions you kept bottled up out. Because you can’t keep holding on else you might just implode. The world isn’t exactly fair at times, you hit wall after wall occasionally, and the world just seems to be against you.

You try to keep it together, you try to remain strong. You try a lot of things that never seemed to work.

And it sucks.

At times you’re scared of leaning on someone because of some past trauma of those close to you leaving all of a sudden. But you know damn well keeping this to yourself would be torture. Suicide even. Especially as those thoughts just keep building up, tormenting you every day until you can’t take any more.

So you tell yourself just let it out. Just let it out before the waves overcome you again.

Before it’s too late.

#blog #personal #feelings #venting

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inariter · 2 years

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Sometimes you just need a place to vent your thoughts. Because it’s easy to be uncertain about things and your mind just run rampant. So many thoughts going through your head at once it’s hard to keep track of.

Honestly, it is hard finding someone who might sit there and listen. Honestly, for me, it was always hard to be open with others. There was always something I withheld, so afraid that I might be judged or that they might leave.

After all, I once tore myself apart all in some hopes a guy might like me or my friends might come back or that I wouldn’t have to make my family worry when there was already so much on their minds. It took awhile to put the pieces back where they belong, even then I wasn’t entirely sure who I was anymore. More importantly who I wanted to be.

Then this last year, I felt things and changed so much. I felt like I was in a place where I was perfectly fine being the person I am. If anything, I felt like I had a place in somewhere I could never find myself. It was nice.

But as an 18 year old with a wide open future ahead, you have to think of what it is you want to be. What you want to be when you grow up. Whether you want to be in college or pursue a different route entirely. And for awhile I thought I knew exactly what I wanted to be. I thought I had my future planned out until other thoughts began to flood my mind. Thoughts of being something entirely different. And as I spoke with my mom today, she said I needed to find a definite point to start from and just grow from there.

I’m still scared of what might happen, still uncertain. But after everything I’ve been through, I think I know who to turn to in these times. I’m just praying that the answer will find me. Just to assure me what I’m doing is my right path.

#personal #blog #feelings #venting

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inariter · 2 years

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Amongst the chaos, amongst the overwhelming waves you felt a pull to just let it all out. Let your soul bleed on paper as words scribbled across its blank surface.

You needed to let it all out. You needed to do something else implode.

Even if there was no one there to listen. Or who you thought might care. Even if they no longer heard those pleas for help, you needed to get it out.

Because despite this void you found yourself in, there was still a small part that yearned to been seen. That yearned for help. That learned for the light.

No matter the tears that poured from your eyes. No matter the blood that dripped. It had to come out.

Just statement to show you were here. That you lived.

But if anything a small hope that welled within. A hope that it might finally come to end, an end that didn’t involve death.

#poem #prose #personal #depression #anxiety

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inariter · 2 years

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Stay with Me-2

Masterlist:

Stay With Me-1

Stay With Me-2

Stay With Me-3

Stay With Me-4

Stay With Me-5

Stay With Me-6

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OA looked at himself in the mirror, his eyes teary as her blood still stained his clothes and hands. No matter the things he tried to forget, that image of (Y/n)’s bloody body haunted his mind.

Even as he tried to recall the details if the event, his mind could never leave the thought of her. OA knew he could of done something, he could have been the FBI agent he always in that situation; grabbing the gun that was holstered at his hips, looking into the crowd for any suspicious people, the things he was trained to do. And yet, in the moment he mind just went blank, preoccupied with the thought of making sure (Y/n) was safe. Making sure she would live to see tomorrow.

Because OA wasn’t sure what would happen if he were to lose her. It was already feeling like this world he built was crumbling right before him and OA knew if he lost (Y/n) it would shattered into pieces so small he wasn’t sure they could be put back together.

“OA, you doing alright in there?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. I’ll be out in a minute.” OA could still hear Maggie on the other side of the door, knowing damn well she didn’t believe his words for a moment. But in times like these, he had to put a brave face on and make sure the bastard that did this was put away.

Finally turning the faucet on, OA scrubbed away the blood that covered his hands; watching as the sink turned red. He could feel the panic which filled his heart, his mind darting to all the what ifs. Only to remind himself to take a deep breathe and finish cleaning up and putting on new clothes that weren’t blood stained.

Exiting the bathroom and heading into the main area, OA could feel the stares on him. So many wondering if he’s alright as their hearts reached out to him with sympathy. They all wanted to catch the person who did this, though a few things had to be covered for better or worst.

“Alright everyone, we have a top priority case. As you all know, there was a shooting earlier today where (Y/n) ,a doctor we all know well, was shot with OA right there. Whether she was targeted because of OA or something entirely different we need to find out, ASAP.”

OA’s jaw clenched as that last sentence left Jubal’s mouth, hating the very thought that he was responsible for this. Everyone had those people they would do everything to ensure harm never came for them. (Y/n) was one of those for OA.

“Are you sure you’re up for this? We would all understand if you wanted to be at the hospital with her?” Jubal asked. OA did his best to keep together this act of his but if someone else asked if he was alright, he wasn’t quite sure he would even get words out.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I just want to find whoever did this to her.”

“We all do. But-”

“We can risk any mistakes out there. So I need assurance that you can keep your cool.”

“I’m fine, Isobel. I can handle it.” OA wasn’t sure who he was convincing now, himself or everyone else. But every time he uttered ‘I’m fine.’ it became a little less believable, even he could see that now.

He just had to remind himself to take deep breathes in some attempt to calm his worrying heart as the team scrubbed the video in search of anything. Telling himself that everything is going to work out in the end, that they’ll catch the criminal behind this like they always do.

Just reassuring himself again and again and trying not to think what happened. No matter how hard it was when all OA was surrounded with was the incident.

“I think I got something!”

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Thanks for all the views and comments! I just had this idea bubbling in my mind and knew I just needed to get it out. Quick shoutout to @wanniiieeee and @amorestevens for your comments. They really mean a lot to me!

#fbi #fbi x reader #OA Zidan #oa zidan x reader #romance #angst #maggie bell #Jubal Valentine #Scola #tiffany #isobel

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inariter · 2 years

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Thank you very much! And I’m glad you like it!

Stay With Me- 1

It all happened so fast. One moment they’re walking peacefully down the street, OA twisting his ring- a habit he never could break. A bumbling question tossing and turning in his mind, wanting nothing more than to spit it out.

“(Y/n)…” OA mutters, his heart going crazy. For a FBI agent who so easily faces danger around each corner, he wasn’t sure why this was so hard to ask. It was a simple question. It almost felt like he was back in school again, trying to ask a girl to the next big dance.

Keep reading

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inariter · 2 years

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Worthless.

Nothing.

A nobody.

So many horrid words echo through your mind. So many words you never thought you’d hear yourself say.

Especially as you stare at that foreign reflection in the mirror. Unsure if that’s the real you or not.

You’d tried everything. You’d tried changing yourself in every way possible. From clothes to appearance. Whatever to make you feel better.

Or really to get a lapse of joy for the compliments they layer on you. Yet it amounts to nothing in the end. Just pushing you further down that hole you created for yourself.

Trying anything to finally feel right in your own skin once more.

Until it doesn’t matter much any more. And you don’t even know who you are.

Lost in the waves of the world, just trying to be someone you’re not. Just trying to fit into the norm. When really you’re anything but normal.

Not like you can see that now.

#personal #poem prose #depression #anixiety

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inariter · 2 years

Text

Thank you! And of course you can!

Stay With Me- 1

It all happened so fast. One moment they’re walking peacefully down the street, OA twisting his ring- a habit he never could break. A bumbling question tossing and turning in his mind, wanting nothing more than to spit it out.

“(Y/n)…” OA mutters, his heart going crazy. For a FBI agent who so easily faces danger around each corner, he wasn’t sure why this was so hard to ask. It was a simple question. It almost felt like he was back in school again, trying to ask a girl to the next big dance.

Keep reading

155 notes · View notes