I used to think that maybe my writing was just too confusing until someone got on my case for using the word 'orator,' because apparently that word is 'confusing.'

ORATOR.

I stopped caring about people understanding my writing after that. Don't get me wrong, I will always try and improve my writing, but I am so done stressing about my writing being as reader-friendly as possible. You cannot win that battle, as there will always be someone who just wants the story spoon fed to them.

I’m so sorry but in the nicest way possible do yall actually read books or just read words??? Cause I’ve been seeing that trend of people not understanding how “snarled” and “eyes darkened” and “eyes softened” etc. was used in a book and like…

Genuinely, do yall just not have imagination?? Or not understand figurative language??? Also eyes do literally darken and soften have you not lived a life??? How do you read with no imagination? Is this how you get through so many books in one month - you simply don’t take the time the understand the words as they are read?

AND I WILL NOT BE EARNING IT BACK

This movie is going to destroy me.

I can't wait.

Look at Duo fighting for their life. See you tomorrow, owl.

I'm letting my one-year streak die a day before it becomes a one-year streak.

Look at this pathetic feathery fuck beg for mercy.

Easily my favorite TFOne post.

His little ears grew after receiving the Tcog

I'm a very professional writer. Very professional. Much professional.

I totally don't have fanfiction on one of my writing platforms. No, publisher sir.

Neil Gaiman trolling his fandom will never not be my favorite posts.

One the day I say they aren't, call an ambulance.

Hi there, first time caller. I've seen a lot of theories around season three showing the "fall of Crowley". Can you confirm or deny?

Aziraphale is the one who falls down the hole. Crowley is killed in a tragic (yet comical) pie-baking accident.

Headcanon for why Bumblebee is called Bumblebee.

Pretending that Cybertronians are using universal translators, and so are actually speaking Cybertronian but it's coming out as English, perhaps the universal translator is simply trying to find the closest Earth equivalent.

Cybertronian names seem to be far more symbolic than Earth names, after all, particularly English ones. You're the best? Let's call you Optimus. You fix things/bots? Guess you're a Ratchet. This is particularly true with names that are in multiple parts, like Bulkhead and Cliffjumper. Cybertronians probably have a far more complex naming system than most Earth societies.

Maybe Bumblebee's Cybertronian name is something like "Black and Yellow fast vehicle," which sounds like a mouthful in direct English, but would likely have an easier pronunciation in their native language. Well, the universal translator, with the aid of Teletraan I, said "Fuck it, you're Bumblebee, because that's the closest, easy to understand, Earth equivalent of that."

Though I also like the other story, where his 'name' was B-127, and a human friend gave him his iconic name, Bumblebee.

That's right, folks, you can't drink, smoke, or decide literally anything 'bout your body because you're too smol brain, but you can die for your country.

If that doesn't make any sense, that's because it DOESN'T.

When you get your older sibling in trouble:

caption this

And this is the hill I have chosen to die on.

Brb, need to laugh out my lungs at one of the most dangerous Deceptions in Megatron's arsenal being referred to as "my little square man."

Keeps nickname for later use

Ayy there’s my square little man

Just watched the Transformers One trailer, and...

OH MY GOD, THEY'RE BABIES!!!

I WOULD DIE FOR THEM BOTH.

"Yeah, I'm the god of coconuts. Sorry 'bout that."

It turns out when you die you don’t face your own God, but instead face the God of whomever or whatever killed you.

Weird AF DM

... WHAT TF ARE THEY SAYING??

The weirdest part is that I checked out the account and it doesn't look like a spam one. It looks legit, but I do not know this person.

Well, that went from 0, to 60, to over 9000 real quick.

Best people. #ACAB

Each sentence gets worse. Each sentence gets more MAGA.