br0kenbunny
I hate existing but it's fine
21🖤goblin bastard 🖤
Welcome to my eclectic blog
I don't post a lot but when I do it's random bullshit so enjoy
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you ever feel a texture that makes you wanna burn your skin off? yes it is wool
#sensory#sensory issues#actually adhd#adhd problems#adhd#autism#autsitic#autism problems#I hate the texture of wool SO MUCH#nightmare nightmare nightmare#cant stand it#and sequins WHO IS ACTUALLY COMFORTABLE IN THEM#NO SPARKLY FABRIC WILL EVER BE COMFORTABLE I STAND ON THAT
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**** one piece wano spoilers if u haven't gotten there yet ****
WHERE THE FUCK IS HAWKINS. WHERE IS HEEEEEE IT STILL SAYS HIS STATUS IS UNKNOWN ON THE WIKI AAA HHHHH PLS DON'T ACTUALLY BE DEAD I BEG OF THEE ODA
#one piece#one piece wano#wano arc#wano spoilers#one piece spoilers#basil hawkins#hawkins one piece#one piece hawkins#one piece anime#one piece angst#fav character
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oh your boyfriend? oof sorry I put him in the compost pile :/ yea he's With The Worms now :/
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fuck it time to put on eyeliner and act like I have a will to live 😎
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Add my Spacehey https://spacehey.com/thedownwardspiral
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thinking bout Moss and Rocks
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I hate how apathetic depression can be. No I'm not actively sad, I'm not actively feeling anything. It's worse in a way. I struggle so hard to feel sometimes, something other than apathy. Depression sucks the life out of you. It's not fun :((
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I don't know who else needs to hear this but it is ok to be scared of something that you rationally realize is not going to happen and likely isn't happening at the moment
Your brain is making you terrified because it is a survival response, you are not crazy or too sensitive or overdramatic for feeling afraid
Feeling afraid is ok
You're allowed to feel afraid
It's far healthier than forcing yourself to shove it down for the sake of keeping yourself small and manageable and agreeable like you always have been
You are allowed to be afraid of a situation that hasn't happened and probably won't happen
Allow yourself to feel it and ride it out
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I've noticed that there's a certain kind of ableism from family and acquaintances that's been wearing on me for a decade now and its when people believe that
Someone else can be ill/disabled but you can't be
And the misstep exists when people think but I know you, how could you possibly be disabled and that is something so deeply frustrating to be on the receiving end of and I'll unpack the two reasons why
1) other people mindset: I think this can be best explained by this calvin and hobbes comic
People often don't realise that anything that can happen to other people can also happen to you or someone you know and that includes gaining a disability. People are afraid and sobered by confronting their mortality, so, they don't... But this causes disability to be made out to be this distant thing, made othered, and this extends the divide between the abled and the disabled so much so that when someone you know tells you that they're disabled, some people refuse to believe it point blank. They don't want to connect the condition to the person or simply they can't, especially when the disablity is invisible.
Which brings me to my second point
2) not knowing what disabilites look like
I'm not saying that its anyone's fault but being expected to mask your pain in society leads to people not understanding what an ordinary person with chronic illness looks like. Which is that they look like everybody else.
a) masking/hiding disabilities:
Sometimes I'll be sitting somewhere completely still not speaking a word, breath shallow, and you'd think I'm relaxed but I'm actually in pain. But you won't know that from just looking at me.
When people have trouble picturing this overlap their push back is 'but I know you, you can't be like these other disabled people'. But the thing is they dont know me. People don't know I mask my adhd. Or that I mask my pain.
(And maybe they do know you but they still view you from 5 years ago when you could walk everywhere to run errands and focus enough to read 5 books in a week and still have energy leftover but with age and time you can't do the same shit anymore and its not a simple matter of trying hard enough.)
b) irregularity of disabilities
Its hard to explain to other people but the intensity of your disability is not constant! It fluctuates and so does your ability to manage it. You can have a good day or a bad day, both completely out of nowhere but other people can't tell, they won't instintually just know you and your limits better than you!
When people say 'but I know you' what they're actually saying is ' I've seen your good days where you manage things just fine so you're clearly exaggerating here and don't need the accommodations you're seeking'
And this is very invalidating and a bit gaslighty and people need to stop this bullshit because it leads to people becoming progressively more sick/ frustrated at themselves but unable to find sympathy and take the necessary steps to access the care they need.
Tldr: stop feeling entitled enough to make judgements about the health of other people's minds and bodies. Anyone can be disabled and everyone deserves to be accomodated
(anyway this was inspired by my mother telling me that she belives me when i say I have adhd but still expects me to get my act together without meds or therapy. your gal is through it rn)
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Thank you for putting this into words, I've come upon so many guilt trippy posts like that and they make me feel so. bad. Like?? I'm already terrified of how everyone perceives me to the point where I barely do anything on social media over the fear that some random person I know will find it and despise me over it (even when it's perfectly reasonable?? Like not controversial I'm just scared of everyone percieving/hating me all the time over anything lmao). Just because someone doesn't make a post about/reblog a topic doesn't mean it isn't important for them, nor does the inaction define their morals.
the post im talking abt is old so i dont wanna assume the person who made it still thinks the same way nowadays, but i rlly dislike that one post abt skin conditions that has a banner that straight up says "this must be reblogged by everyone" & afterwards even says "its ok if u dont reblog this but think about why"
like yeah, we extremely need more awareness & discussion about skin conditions, & i say this as someone who struggled with severe cystic acne & compulsive skin picking (dermatillomania).
its just so awful & counterproductive 2 imply that bc a person doesn't reblog a post it suddenly reflects their views, feelings, thoughts on a topic??
especially it is harmful to those of us with OCD who already have a brain threatening us day-to-day into performing compulsions based on magical thinking logic... all those posts & chainmail shit that are like, "if you dont rb this, x horrible thing happens" are TERRIBLE for ppl with OCD (& just in general too) & this also applies to all those posts that guilt trip ppl into reblogging, as if online activism was always 100% a reflection of your morals & political views. help. it's just so shitty! the world doesnt work that way at all !
tl;dr guilt trippy posts that imply you are automatically bad because you dont reblog smth are so so shitty to ppl with OCD & other disorders & just bad in general. please be mindful of how that kind of logic could mess with our brains.
"think about why you dont wanna reblog this" maybe think about why you think forcing people into performing online activism is somehow an effective way of spreading authentic awareness when it actually just makes people say things on the internet out of guilt rather than out of genuine desire to help out...!
you can reblog this post but you are no obligated to, no matter what
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Abuse victims don’t owe it to you to be “soft.” They don’t owe it to you to be “gentle.”
Abuse victims don’t exist to validate your beliefs that everything “happens for a reason” nor do they exist to show you that “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”
Every abuse victim is unique and they heal and react differently. And they are not wrong if it doesn’t fit your standards or expectations.
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sun pirates: damn it a human
tiger: lets be nice to her
arlong: yeah but what if we kill her
tiger: no she’s part of the crew
arlong: yeah but what if we murder this little girl
jimbei: fuck off arlong
arlong: okay but what if we kill her
everyone: no stop
arlong: yeah but what if we just kill everyone
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