bg-brainrot
Astarion is Ruining My Life
30s, rogue-obssessed gamer/dnd-er
✨ blog for BG3 and Astarion ✨
occasionally 18+ so discretion is advised
👁️
find my fanfic: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bg_brainrot
(this is a side blog, likes/follows come from bg-brainrot-and-beyond)
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Mortal Astarion X F! Human Tav. Ummm, angst.👀
For decades, this manor offered him a place to call home in the truest sense.
The hallway was a sacred gallery, adorned with paintings that were not mere canvases, but tangible echoes of their life together. Each brushstroke, lovingly rendered by her hand, captured the essence of cherished memories.
Whenever he opened the door at the end of the hallway, he was greeted by the radiant smile of his beloved, and the hearth beckoned him to surrender to its comforting embrace. Yet, it was the vast window next to it that held the greatest significance. The tender caress of sunlight danced across his skin as he lost himself in the pages of a book beside her. It was here, bathed in the golden rays, that he could truly revel in the miracle she had bestowed upon him – the cure to his vampiric curse, a gift of life, a reminder of the depths of her love and the power it held to transcend even the most insurmountable of boundaries.
Here at home, he had found everything his heart desired.
But nothing is ever truly perfect. Life simply doesn't work that way. Even the mightiest of fortresses cannot withstand the relentless march of time.
He thought he was ready for it, but not like this.
Never like this.
_________
The poem cited is "When You Are Old" BY W.B. Yeats. One of my favorites.❤️
Alright, thanks for reading the second installment of my "this did not really happen to my couple". After delving into the mortality of my Tav, Amaara, I found myself confronting a fear more profound than death itself – the fear of morbidity, of life's vibrancy fading before its inevitable end. So I decided to yank my CP around this theme. Self-indulgence at its finest.😊
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WIBTAH if asked my friend with benefits what we are?
I have been hooking up with my "friend" (M, ~239) for the past several weeks and it's been nice. He's amazing in bed, he makes me laugh, we have a good time together.
But recently we've gotten a little closer? Like we don't just sleep together anymore. At first it was all a hookup, of course, but I can't help but find myself wanting more.
Here's where I might be an AH though. He has not had a normal relationship, well ever? It's really personal, but he's basically been trapped in a bad situation for two centuries. He didn't have a lot of freedom, he didn't get to know too many people, let alone get close to anyone. I might be the only person he's slept with that hasn't died has stuck around.
Considering his past, I feel kind of guilty for even wanting more. Especially knowing he might not be in the right headspace for it-- Like I'm taking advantage of his first time being free to hookup with whoever he wants.
That being said, I can't take it anymore! If he so much as punctures my neck again I mean. If he so much as looks my way again, I might really just sit him down for the talk. So I need to know, before I put my foot in my mouth, WIBTAH if I put him in that 'what-are-we' situation?
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Ahhh this is lovely 🥹 I love how you really expanded on the idea, on why he's such a cat about it. It's just so very him ✨
Thank you so much for writing this!
Catstarion
Sorry for the slow uploads, been going out with friends and working for a bit but here's the next one, inspired by @bg-brainrot's post here. Thank you for the idea!
As you set your cup down, ready for another round of wine, you sense something, no, someone staring intently at you. Turning around, you find Astarion standing at the stairs leading up to the rooms, ruby red eyes piercing into your very soul as he stares, arms resting on the banister.
You’ve known him long enough to know what this means so with a sigh, you thank the bartender for his hospitality, excuse yourself from your increasingly drunk group of companions and head over to the stairs.
The vampire grins when he sees you approaching, gently pulling you to one side by your arm.
“Already turning in for the night, my sweet?” His fingers trail up your arm, lips whispering in your ear. The tips of your ears burn, feeling his words ghost over them.
“So it seems,” you reply. “Care to join me?”
The corners of his lips curve upwards, a sparkle in his eyes as he takes your hand in his, intertwining your fingers and gently takes the lead, thumb running over the back of your palm. His wordless answer brings a small smile to your face and you let him guide you, annoyance left at the bar counter.
He turns the corner and opens the door to his room, ushering you in before closing the door behind him. He remains standing at the door as you make your way to the bed, getting comfortable before patting the spot next to you but he doesn’t move.
Raising an eyebrow, you tuck yourself under the covers before patting the pillow next to yours and yet he refuses to budge. Well, third time’s the charm, right? You open your arms and he immediately shoots over, burying himself in your embrace. Amused, you chuckle, which sends reverberations through him. He happily hums in response, shifting so that you have easy access to the entirety of his hair and grabs one of your hands, dropping it on the top his head.
“Don’t worry, I haven’t forgotten,” you snort as you begin to run your fingers through his soft white curls. He lets out a sigh of contentment, basking in the familiar rhythm of your fingers combing his locks, massaging his scalp along the way. The gentle movements start to lull him into a trance and he feels his eyes begin to close, his grip on your clothes loosening but then you do the unthinkable.
You shift.
Immediately his eyes snap open and he turns to glower up at you. You raise your hands in surrender, eyeing him warily as he scowls.
“My love, please do not interrupt my trance again.”
“Sorry, won’t happen again.”
“It better not.”
With a huff, he turns, stretching out across your legs like a cat before curling back up, feeling your fingers continue their movements through his hair. He loves it when you do this, when you let him trance whilst resting on you without making a single fuss even though you have little to no intention of going to sleep yourself. He loves how you don’t mind carving out time for him amidst your busy schedule, you could always ignore him until you were done drinking but you always responded to his call, putting aside your own needs and wants for him. He knew he could ask anything of you and you would do it, without crossing the boundaries the both of you had set at the start of your relationship of course.
To him, you always had something better to do than attend to his petty whining but to you, he always came first and he still couldn’t fathom why. Maybe one day he would, perhaps if he sat you down and talked to you about it, he would understand, but that would be after The Absolute was defeated and the worms were removed. He was becoming more positive about the party’s prospects in a fight against The Absolute, although he preferred hiding such feelings.
As your fingers continue to work their magic in his hair, his thoughts drift to the many ways you’ve upended his life. You’ve shown him what it means to love, what it means to be genuine, what it means to care about others. You’ve added to his life, and changed things that were already in his life. You’d made it your whole mission to help him associate actions that once caused him pain and misery with something more pleasant, the only reason why he could slip into a trance whilst you ran your fingers through his hair. Back then, such an action always came with —
Cough.
Astarion groans, reaching up to poke your cheek, “I’m trying to trance here, love. A little peace and quiet would be nice.”
“Sorry,” you pout, giving him the puppy dog eyes he can never resist and he lets the matter slide, returning back to his thoughts and attempt to trance.
You’re always careful to not pull his hair, with knots always being gently untied either with your fingers or a comb should one be nearby. You’re also the only one he trusts to take care of his hair, whether it be washing or helping to maintain it.
He feels you rest your free hand on his waist, the warmth from your palm spreading through his cold undead body and feels the urge to slip into a trance wash over him once more. Knowing he is safe in your arms, for nothing will be able to hurt him when you’re around, he lets the urge take hold, readying himself for whatever nightmares could plague his rest.
That is if you didn’t sneeze right there and then.
Astarion clicks his tongue, refusing to even open his eyes and exclaims, “Gods, how am I supposed to trance in these conditions?”
He buries his face into your thighs, putting up a dramatic show of angrily muttering under his breath while you apologise, struggling to hold in your laughter.
“Come on Astarion. If you want to trance properly, you should’ve just told me to go to sleep!”
“But then you wouldn’t be able to do…this!” He gestures vaguely in the direction of your hand which is still buried beneath his white curls, letting out yet another huff.
“You’ll have to choose one then, Star. I can’t seem to do both.” There’s mirth in your voice and for a moment Astarion wonders if you’re just toying with him but then the look in your eyes reassures him and he lets out a sigh of resignation, sitting up so that you can get into a comfortable position to sleep.
“Fine. Sleep next to me, my love.” He wraps you in a cocoon made from his arms, nuzzling into your neck and feels his fangs press against your skin — the only barrier between him and your blood. Yet you don’t flinch, trusting that he will only bite after asking you for permission and snuggle against him under the covers.
“Stop spending so much time with them,” you hear him mumble. So that was why he was acting so weirdly all night.
“You have me all to yourself every night, don’t you worry.” You press a peck to the top of his head, tucking him tighter against your body.
“And you’ll have me for all eternity too.”
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Thinking about how much I love the spawn Astarion graveyard sex scene (well, 'scene' is a generous term, since it's fade-to-black, but that's part of why I like it). I personally headcanon that it was pretty spontaneous--that Astarion didn't bring Tav there for that purpose, that he had originally intended just to show the one he loves the place where his life first ended to talk about his new life beginning. But, when the mood shifted just right, Astarion took a chance and grasped the feeling.
If it was spontaneous, it would probably have been the first completely uncalculated sex that Astarion can remember having. Sex that was far more about the emotions surrounding it than the sex itself. Yes, it's in the open on a grave, but it's not played off as done for the thrill or anything like that--if the place that held meaning for Astarion had been indoors, he would have done it there. It was about overwriting this place of horror with an act of love and intimacy and enjoyment (and there's an edge of defiance to it that is so Astarion, ugh I love it), a first step in Astarion writing his new life. And, with the fade-to-black, reinforcing that he is done with performance.
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She named them Bella, Blueberry, Buttercup and Roger.
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Caard
✧ Shall we dance? ✧
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pick up ur wet cat please :/
he puts water everywhere
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There is something about writing for Astarion that scratches an itch that the game doesn't quite reach.
Obviously a big part of it is putting him in situations he doesn't experience in the game, fleshing out his reactions to things, the like, but just... imagining him in all five senses? Not just the way he looks and sounds.
Imagining his skin, how cold it would be to the touch. How his fingers would warm over time entwined in yours. How his touch would leave shivering trails in its wake.
Imagining his scent, how it would waft from him. How it would surround you like his embrace. How it would slowly seep into you and begin to feel like a secondary home.
Imagining his taste, how unexpected it is the first time your lips part to welcome it in. How easily you find your tongue exploring for more. How every single flavor of his body is yours to try.
Just ahhhhhhhhhh, everyone should write for this man because he's like pure imagination fuel.
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I'm going to go with ESH. Listen OP, as much as Ash was in the wrong for wanting to ascend to ultimate power, you also agreed to help him, only to back out at the last second.
Sure you were tired, probably bleeding out, but put yourself in his shoes! You've just defeated your greatest enemy, Carl, and you're on top of the world. He was probably feeling invincible in that moment. In fact, he was probably just as high on adrenaline as you were on fumes.
Of course he tried going for it. That's when you, as a trusted friend, need to either be his ride-or-die or be honest about how uncomfortable the situation makes you. Who knows, maybe he would have even listened to you.
He trusted you in that moment. And then you gave him false hope? Oof, OP. Not a kind of friend I would want either.
Ash could have been kinder, or, you know, not wanted to become an all-powerful vampire, but you could have been a better friend.
AITA for killing a powerful vampire lord so that my vampire friend wouldn't ascend and become an AH?
I (101f, high elf) have been traveling with this guy (259m, high elf vampire) for a while now (let's call him Ash), listening to him talk about his old vampire master (I'm calling him Carl) and how much he wants to kill him and something about a ritual for days now. DAYS.
It all sounded like it was going to be a very bad idea for basically everyone involved. Either we were going to have a super powerful vampire ascendant on our hands or we were going to have to fight a tough battle to stop him. Ash made me promise to have his back and put a stop to his master's ritual and I agreed.
Except things went fucking sideways. Ash got pulled into the ritual, there were bats everywhere, Carl kept turning into fucking mist, ghouls kept attacking us, there were werewolves, the only time I managed to yeet Carl's ass down into the chasm below he fucking popped back up like the world's ugliest jack-in-the-box, like everything that could have possibly gone wrong DID go wrong. Half my team died in that fight and had to get rezzed. I almost died in that fight.
And then THIS asshole, Ash, had the au-damn-dacity to want to ascend instead of Carl. Didn't we do all that work to kill Carl? Why are we not killing Carl right now?
I'll admit, I was running on fumes, bleeding faster than I could think, so when he asked me to help him, I just sort of went with it until he asked to link our minds so that he could carve ritual runes into Carl's back. That's when it clicked. This bitch didn't want revenge, he wanted to become an all-powerful vampire. And that, dear readers, seemed like a really bad fucking idea.
So I did the only logical thing and said no. Ash got pissy, but then decided stabbing Carl to death was still on the table, so he did that. And then pitched a damn fit and killed about 7000 other people too, all because I said no.
And then when all THAT was done, he blew up in my face, accused me of ruining everything, and said he hoped I died screaming. Like...what the hell?
So clearly he thinks I'm the asshole. You tell me. AITA?
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Absolutely feral for this bloodsucking mf
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@bg-brainrot made Peepaw Gale in their fic set way after the defeat of the brain and so I had to make him!
Also read the fic, it's my favourite post game one!
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Thinking about how, like a cat, Astarion would hate it when you smell different. Not like if you're covered in mud or blood, but if you have the scent of someone else on you.
Astarion: What have you been up to?
Tav: Oh just hanging out with Karlach, why?
Astarion: You smell all wrong. I hate it.
Tav: I hadn't even noticed. Well, I'm sure I'll return to normal soon enough.
Astarion: *openly contemplates rubbing on you like a cat*
Tav: Are you thinking what I think you're thinking?
Astarion: *snaps out of it* Gods no, what do you take me for, a mangy stray?!
Tav: *barely holding back a 'yes'*
Astarion: Ugh, stop that. Either go take a bath or let me fix this.
Astarion would then spend several minutes dabbing you with his scents.
#astarion#astarion x tav#fanfic lite#i assume he has a good sense of smell#and like all cats hates it when things are different lol
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Thinking of how there's the option to eat the tadpole in bg3 and how laios would probably eat it if he was in the game
(Senshi only stops him so he can eat it gourmet/cooked)
#dungeon meshi#bg3#this made me lol#not Astarion#but i love laios too#i like men with weird diets obviously
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they moved wyll to the center for good pr
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