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yenonnoff · 3 days

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TEACH ME HOW TO LOVE! 22. 2 people, 1 truth

note: word count is 3.8k :D

“they really are little rascals, especially this one!” atsumu huffed with an orange kitten pressed against his chest. you found him near an alleyway and were currently walking back to april’s store.

it was a convenience store, and she used the second floor as her living space. after you were banned from eating the snacks at your parents’ place, you started hanging out at april’s more often. she always gave you the snacks for free and you spent most of your childhood there: in april’s store next to her floor fan as customers came and went.

“you’re back!” april rushed out in a hurry, reaching to pet the kitten still in your arms. “their mom’s in the back with the other younglings so i’ll need to wash them. but before that, tell me how i can repay the two of you.”

you rushed to decline. “no, no. don’t worry about it, we did this because we just wanted to help.”

april laughed heartily. “then thank you, darling, for helping me find the kittens.” she smiled towards atsumu, “and thank you… y/n’s boyfriend. looks like i never got your name!” she erupted again in buoyant laughter.

your co-star returned her smile. “it’s atsumu miya, nice to meet you.” his response garnered an elbow to the side from you. “he’s not my boyfriend, just a coworker,” you clarified quickly.

her excitement didn’t fade, a sly twinkle shining in her aged eyes. she grabbed the kittens from you and atsumu, the two troublemakers tugging insistently at her floral blouse. “we’ll continue this later, they’re really impatient aren’t they?”

when april left, you and atsumu occupied the bench in front of the store. he stretched and yawned. “what were you saying about your parents before you got cut off?” he asked curiously.

“oh, my parents aren’t here anymore. we moved to miyagi prefecture when i got to high school, and they stayed there after i moved to tokyo for university.”

“must’ve been hard when their only child left,” he said, lifting a brow when you laughed. “not at all,” you replied. “i was a handful to them, they were glad i left.”

growing up, a part of you resented your parents for moving away from your hometown. you dreamt of everything: attending a nearby high school and keeping up with your studies—going home and helping the residents with their tasks around town. it was the perfect harmony, and it was shattered due to your parents.

you realized later it was because they hated everything the town stood for: peace, gaiety, and the ability to melt your heart. they must’ve hated the cool summers too—the long family walks through town after supper where you admired wildflowers in the sidewalk cracks. they must’ve hated the colorful peonies in the spring and the lively tradition where all the residents came together to have one big picnic in the field. you still remembered it so vividly. each household needed to bring something special (music, toys for the kids, food, or drinks) to be able to participate. once, your parents said you were their special item and the residents exploded in cheerful laughter and agreement. looking back, you wondered how true that actually was of your parents.

they were bored of the place they grew up in, and they tossed it away without even asking you. they threw their friends away, the memories they made with everyone, and—worse of all—they desecrated your love for the town and its people.

you’d cried during departure, watching as everyone bore smiling faces in an attempt to uplift yours. you hadn’t cried in years, and you were about to attend high school. you saw them hand you gifts—all the things you loved and things that’ll remind you of your true home. you hoped they knew you weren’t the one who wanted to leave; you hoped they knew it was because your parents hated their kind generosity.

“i hated leaving my hometown behind. if i could, i would’ve stayed with them while my parents left. i would’ve been okay without them. but when i got to my new school, things started to get better,” you said, fidgeting with the palm of your hand. “i excelled at my classes and made new friends. they filled an empty part in me and i was able to be with them 24/7 through volleyball.” you paused for a moment. “but my parents didn’t like that. they didn’t like it when i went to my team’s matches to support them, they didn’t like that i was barely home with them.”

atsumu remained silent while you talked. his back was pressed against the wall and his shoulder was touching yours. his silence comforted you, his warmth made you continue. “i think they realized it was out of their control now, that when i went off to university, they wouldn’t have to deal with me anymore. i saved up money from my part-time job and moved to tokyo with my friends. my parents stopped calling me afterwards, but i still send money back home to them.”

you choked back a sob, chuckling at the weird situation: you pouring your feelings out to your attentive co-star. you avoided looking at him.

“what about your aunt april? couldn’t you have stayed with her?”

you laughed quietly. “she’s not my real aunt, her husband isn’t my real uncle either. they just treated me really nicely, like i was a part of their family. actually, they were my parents’ rivals. the town only needed one convenience store and i guess my parents were the ones who left. maybe they didn’t like how welcoming aunt april treated me, but i knew she never wanted us to leave. and i never wanted to be seen as a burden to them. they already had so much on their plate, i just couldn’t invade their lives like that.”

atsumu hummed. “but if you had asked, they would’ve accepted in a heartbeat.” you smiled sadly—what he said was true.

you couldn’t help but imagine what your life would’ve been like if you’d stayed. you would’ve been happy, you would’ve continued to stay in your hometown after graduation, maybe even become a farmer. you would’ve been surrounded by people who loved you and familiar sights. but you would’ve never met shimizu and the others. you would’ve never realized the wonders of living in a big city filled with opportunities. you wouldn’t be acting. you wouldn’t have met atsumu and experienced all of this.

when you realized that silence took over the conversation, you attempted a weak smile. “well! enough of me—”

“you don’t have to hide it, y/n,” atsumu said. “you can be unprofessional too.”

your heart staggered. hot tears threatened to fall and you only said, “it’s okay, i don’t want to talk about it right now.”

atsumu nodded at your response, sitting up more casually. you were grateful when he started talking: “it’ll be unfair if i didn’t tell you about myself too, right?” he stopped briefly to think. “my brother and i were adamant about volleyball during high school. awards, summer camps, interhigh, nationals—you name it. being recognized for your incredible setting skills had its perks,” he winked and you laughed. “i got some modeling gigs and then eventually went into acting.”

you listened intently to him as he spoke. there was always something about atsumu. was it his assertiveness or the way he naturally drew people in? you had a feeling it was both. the more time you spent with him, the more you wanted to know about him.

“the first time i scored a big role, i was confused by how happy i felt. i remembered the amount of compliments they gave me, not only for my acting skills but for volleyball as well. ‘a real talent,’ they’d told me once, and it made me want to continue acting. i struggled here and there with getting roles, mainly due to my inexperience, but it was a challenge i wanted to overcome. i felt the same amount of frustration when messing up a scene as passing a bad set. i felt the same amount of joy too, so it was difficult to decide which path i wanted to take after high school.”

you asked when he became silent, “how did your parents react?”

he didn’t turn to look at you but you saw his lips pulled into a grim smile. “horrible,” he said. “‘samu wanted to pursue culinary arts and i wanted to focus on acting. my parents knew i had some roles during high school but they didn’t like that i wanted to do it professionally. my mom was clinging onto the chance that i would continue volleyball unlike my brother.” atsumu tightened his hands, his expression hard and dour. “but they didn’t realize that i was still playing, just not competitively. i didn’t compromise my love for it, never did.”

you felt a strange pull of admiration. you could hate atsumu all you want for his actions, but you could never hate the confidence he radiated. you’ve seen it before: at the script read through and on the first day of filming. when he stepped on set, reading his lines with such certainty and zeal, your eyes didn’t want to look away. so this was atsumu miya, you thought. this was the highly praised atsumu—the side he proudly chose to display.

but right now, he was just atsumu, regular atsumu. he was another person that goes through things like everyone else. you had believed vehemently before that your co-star was only capable of hate and disdain. that he could only conjure up sly, distasteful frowns. now he was more human than you thought.

“i’m sorry,” was all you could say in response. atsumu shook his head, his eyes downcasted. “it got better eventually, it’s been a couple years and they’ve come around.”

he continued: “it took a lot to convince them and myself that it was the right choice. i didn’t land any major roles for a year straight.”

you blinked. who wouldn’t want atsumu on their production? even if this happened years ago, atsumu already had a couple major roles under his belt. you had a feeling it wasn’t him or his skills that were at fault.

“a fucking year straight,” he spat his words venomously. “i practiced everyday until my body gave up, and for what? some rich insecure pieces of shit to come by and flaunt their money in the director’s face? i didn’t want anything to stop me from acting except my skills.”

you imagined atsumu practicing his lines over and over again until he was satisfied. you saw him beating himself up for every mistake he would make. to atsumu, it must’ve felt like preparing for a volleyball match: setting and serving until he could no longer—until his exhausted body begged him to stop. it felt vivid to you. after all, you were both hardworking perfectionists, and you were both treading through an industry where the rich reigned and the skilled surrendered.

for a year straight, atsumu dealt with this. he couldn’t do anything, powerless to change the directors’ decisions.

you stared at him with a pained expression. “bribery,” you said meekly and he nodded. “just like what emma did.”

“so you knew,” he said, low and accepting.

“yes, i did, about her bribing director sage. but i want to hear it from you, not from a friend or anywhere else.”

he nodded and you braced yourself for what was about to come. “i didn’t know at first, no one did except for the director and committee team. you wouldn’t have expected her to do something like that: she was nice and endearing, even to the staff members. but i always questioned why director sage was so hard on her. it wasn’t as if she lacked talent. she was good—well, good enough, i suppose. then i realized what it was about her. she had talent but not skills from experience. whenever filming lasted longer than it should’ve due to her, everyone was forgiving. they ignored her issues because she was nice and pretty.”

you swallowed at his words. with money, you could buy opportunities, but not skills and experience that are on par with actors who’ve been doing this for way longer. you couldn’t, unless you knew how to adapt—unless you were a quick learner. emma was none of those things.

you watched atsumu rub his hands against his face, a sorrowful chuckle leaving his lips. “there were signs and i was blind to them. i only focused on her, thinking how amazing she was. she only had two years of experience so her mistakes were understandable. but this was a director sage film. his standards were fucking crazy. how did she land the main role if not for bribery and blackmail?”

you had to confess, after returning from the trip to the record store slash beach, you finally watched director sage’s latest film. it aired two years ago but was one of his most popular works ever. emma had the main role but surprisingly, atsumu was only the second lead. he didn’t have much screen time but whenever he appeared in a scene with emma, you felt your heart stop, your breath hitching in your throat. their chemistry was otherworldly, and you understood why the whole internet went into chaos when they broke up. if you had watched this two years ago, you would’ve rooted for them too.

“oh, but,” he quickly turned towards you, saying softly, “don’t blame director sage too much. it was his choice to make, but there were devastating circumstances. if he didn’t accept emma’s bribe, there would’ve been no film. her father would’ve cut off all the budget, including the ones from other companies. a single word from him would’ve cost director sage his career.” atsumu’s eyes turned dark and discernible. “i’m not saying his choice was right. emma forcibly stole opportunities from other aspiring actors and director sage helped her to do so. but still… he was in a difficult situation.”

there was affection in his voice when he said the last sentence. you’ve seen them interact many times before, and it always occurred to you how easily atsumu laughed and smiled in the director’s presence. they both adored one another dearly, both having fond memories of working together years ago.

“don’t worry, i don’t,” you reassured him. “but when i came, you thought i also blackmailed him. you thought director sage was put in another difficult situation.” you weren’t angry at him, you only stated frankly what had happened. but the latter pained atsumu more than the former. he wished you would yell at him or be in a fit of rage again (like your confrontation at the beach) because he knew he was wrong. he messed up and you were the one that was hurt.

but you didn’t fault him, not after hearing about everything. atsumu was distrusting, both towards you and the acting industry. how could he not? the person he was in love with had betrayed her morals and his trust.

“you’re right,” he said. “i was too quick to blame you. i judged you without knowing anything and spoke about you badly when i wasn’t any better. you were none of the things i claimed you were. you’re incredible, you know that? you made those four idiots fall in love with you on the first day of filming. you made director sage fall in with you. and you reminded me what good acting was. it was exhilarating to see someone with the same amount of passion as me. i fell in love with acting again just by watching you act.”

your cheeks burned at his words. you’ve received compliments before but it was different when your unapproachable and grumpy co-star said it.

atsumu shifted to face you, both of your feet pointing in each other’s directions. “so i’m sorry, y/n. i’m sorry for dragging you into this, you were never the problem. what those staff members said were true: i am extremely cocky and pretentious, i’m hasty and reckless with both my actions and words. and i had hurt you greatly. could you forgive me?”

you felt his vulnerability, his hesitant gaze on you. it wasn’t his fault, you wanted to say. it was okay.

“i could, and i will. you’re forgiven, atsumu.” you waited another moment to say, “not everything the staff members said was true. you’re not undeserving of your role or fame.”

“did they say that too?”

you nodded and his eyebrows pinched together. “they said that because of my relationship with emma. after the film aired, everyone in the industry knew. some felt stronger about it than others; some could care less because it was so normalized; and some even praised her for being rich and having connections. it’s gross. if you don’t have the skills to earn your roles fairly through auditioning, you’re pathetic. instead of using that money to drag the director and your co-stars down, you should be spending it on acting classes.”

you had to tug on his arm to get his attention. you didn’t mind his rant, but you were too curious about what that had to do with him being labeled “undeserving.”

atsumu caught your eye and said, “oh, right. emma and i broke up a year after the film. we didn’t tell anyone what the reason was, but the bribery part was only half the story. those staff members were the same ones i worked with all those years ago. they saw how emma and i were—probably thought i was the same blackmailing fox as her.” he let out another low chuckle. “or maybe that i used my connection with director sage to my advantage. or that i already had my chance to work with him, and that another person should’ve gotten the opportunity.”

in your eyes, atsumu was never undeserving. director sage picked him for the lead role because he truly believed atsumu was worthy of it. you’d heard from kuroo that atsumu came out of his year-long break because of director sage. he just wanted to work with his favorite director again. atsumu had the confidence and skills to do so. what was so wrong about that?

you patted him on the shoulder. “it’s not true, everyone knows it’s not. don’t be so hard on yourself.” your words made him laugh. a genuine one this time, it wasn’t sorrowful or somber like the previous ones.

“thank you,” he said. “i’ll take it easy. i didn't think this trip would become so sentimental. did i bore you?” he asked mischievously. you shook your head no, the two of you exchanging pleasant smiles.

you stretched your arms. how long were the two of you sitting on the wooden bench anyway? the sun was disappearing and leaving behind a trail of vibrant vermillion in its wake. it was already five o’clock.

when the two of you peeked inside the convenience store, you saw april talking with her husband by the cash register. she noticed you two, turning to say, “there they are! did you have fun out there?”

apparently she had finished washing the kittens a long time ago, even having enough time to prepare dinner. a large dinner, enough to feed an army. “we didn’t want to interrupt the sweet moment so we waited,” april beamed while you, atsumu, and her husband followed behind on the staircase.

atsumu whispered to you, “should i be here?”

you nodded. after all, april’s homemade meals were the best. no amount of restaurants could compare, you knew he would be missing out if he didn’t give it a try.

thankfully, dinner wasn’t awkward. april’s husband got along well with your co-star, minus the first interaction when he’d mistaken him for your boyfriend. it was becoming a running joke but you didn’t mind. you finally had the chance to sit down and talk to april and her husband, reminiscing about what happened during the time when you didn’t visit. you mentioned your previous film—vengeance—and the two of them chatted about your amazing performance. apparently everyone in town stopped what they were doing to watch it the day it aired. they were your first ever supporters after all.

you also mentioned your friends, to which april smiled in relief. then you talked about your new film and gestured towards atsumu, your co-star who was caught off guard with food stuffed in his mouth. you left out all the bad parts in your story, focusing mainly on your “friendly” competition at the amusement park and the fun trip to the record store slash beach. you also mentioned jolie and the others, even director sage and how he looked better in person.

atsumu got to talk too: about his twin brother and their volleyball experience during high school. atsumu boasted about being the number one setter and april’s husband, who you’ve known since childhood, brought up unexpectedly about how he’d played once as well.

“captain of my team,” he laughed with his whole body. “that was my prime.”

it got to the point where all the dirty dishes were cleaned off the table and april brought out peeled tangerines. you got to play with the kittens while atsumu and april’s husband continued to converse about volleyball. it was endearing and bittersweet that the two of you had to leave. you wanted to freeze the moment—you’d forgotten how nice it felt to be back in your hometown.

“must you go already?” april asked, standing at the door of her convenience store. her husband chimed in, “if they don’t catch the train, they’ll be stuck here.”

she nudged him with an annoyed expression. “that’s what i’m trying to do.” she turned back towards you. “the whole town’s excited for your new film, y/n. we’ll definitely watch it so make sure to visit again. you as well, atsumu.”

the two of you thanked them for dinner, saying your farewells and heading to the train station.

“thank you for bringing me here,” atsumu said as you waited on the platform.

“did i one up you? be honest.”

he replied hesitantly, “yes. i have to admit your hometown is pretty nice.”

“then let me borrow your jacket again on the train.”

“oh? you’re finally gonna go to sleep?”

your eyes widened in embarrassment. “you knew?” he smirked at your dazed expression. “how could i not? kind of hard when you were wriggling in your seat trying to get comfortable.”

“i will fall asleep this time. today’s been really exhausting.”

atsumu peered down at you, saying, “good work today, y/n, and…”

he didn’t get to finish his sentence, interrupted by the roaring of the approaching train. you stepped inside, turning to ask, “what did you say?”

“nevermind,” he smiled. “let’s get to our seats before we both fall asleep standing up.”

atsumu had told you many things today, but the unspoken ones might’ve been the most important. he wanted to tell you again that he was sorry for everything. and he wanted to tell you that he was glad you were his co-star.

masterlist ⌒☆ previous ⌒☆ next

fun facts:

director sage did NOT like working with emma one bit, but he made sure to hide his disdain at all times.

when atsumu went to audition for director sage's previous film, he went with a friend of his. she practiced for the main role relentlessly but her audition didn't pass. atsumu always held a grudge towards emma for stealing his friend's chance; if it weren't for her, his friend would've gotten the role. she was a better actress than emma anyway.

y/n and atsumu took a million pictures of the kittens. there were five of them! she sent them all to the group chat for them to gawk at.

TEACH ME HOW TO LOVE! ｡ｏ♡ an atsumu miya smau

synopsis: when y/n l/n, a rising actress, decides to star in a romance film that could make or break her career, she’s unable to showcase her skills, revealing her inexperience within the romance department instead. worst of all, atsumu miya, her co-star and the main lead’s love interest, seems to hate her guts! with absolutely, unbearably zero chemistry between the two, an idea was proposed: spend time with one another in the upcoming weeks. will y/n be able to ignore her professionalism and listen to her heart? and will she, a clueless romantic, be able to pick up on the signs her co-star is sending her?

a/n: FINALYL FINISHED UGHHH I SWEAR THIS TOOK AN ETERNITY hoped u liked y/n and atsumu's backstories + his very heartfelt apology + emma being a very bad person

taglist is open! dm or ask to be a part of it! (those bolded were unable to be tagged)

⌒☆ @kqbukimono @empathum @clyver @chosoluv @oceansfloor @sunarots @marga-j @rukia-uchiha-98 @wyrcan @thechaosoflonging @rintarousgirl @ast4rg1rl @seiamor @saiewithakatana @usermins @literally-a-ferret @terrarain @iuspired @haruskatana @wolffmaiden @ris-krispie @vellichxrr6782 @animenaces-world @reignsaway @emii4evr @writing-for-the-hell-of-it @yuminako @tojirin @v3nusplanetofluv @vyvixen @secondary-character-25 @tenjikusstuff4 @444choso @mylahrins @deimmortales99 @hisfuture @staywhelmed8801 @dl-yum @nessaasstuff @milesmoralesluvs @101tsumu @ryeyeyer @cherrypieyourface

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yenonnoff · 7 days

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TEACH ME HOW TO LOVE! 21. cat chase

note: continuation will be on chapter 22 (word count: 3.9k)

“are you sure about this?”

the train station had been completely silent. there wasn’t a single soul in sight until two figures stepped into the deserted space.

“do you honestly expect me to spend the next three hours by myself completely bored out of my mind? not happening.”

the sound of shoes against concrete came to a stop and you shifted to face atsumu. “what about the rumor?” atsumu’s shoulders tensed, his expression unreadable. you let another silent minute pass before turning away. “nevermind.” even now, he still didn’t want to tell you about emma.

the two of you continued towards the platform, halting a couple feet away from the yellow line. there really was no one around, it was just you and atsumu. but what did you expect when you were heading to a small town three hours away from tokyo? it was the morning of a weekday, too.

you didn’t notice atsumu inching closer; you didn’t notice the way his gaze was glued to you.

he faked a cough. “i forgot to tell you earlier, but you look nice today.”

you’ve been around him for so long that you’re not shocked by the randomness of the compliment. was it even a compliment? for all you know, it could be a distasteful lie or an attempt to bait you into doing something absurd. he has a knack for dragging people into his antics unfortunately.

“thank you,” you responded, catching the satisfaction in his eyes. he must’ve been waiting for you to return the compliment because he placed an eager hand on his hip, a smirk adorning his features. “what are you doing?”

“waiting for my highly anticipated compliment.”

“so the great actor atsumu miya needs validation too, huh?”

he smiled, “all i heard was ‘great actor.’”

you looked him up and down. he went casual as always but it was frustrating to see how much it suited him. a basic white tee hung loose against his chest and he carried a small backpack. his signature denim cap was nestled on top of his head, strands of blond poking out from the side. “you look…presentable.”

if you weren’t so occupied with his appearance, you would’ve caught the corner of his lip twitching, a faint blush dancing across his cheeks. your gaze was ticklish against his skin.

ducking his head, atsumu rubbed the back of his neck. he was covering a laugh, muttering under his breath, “‘presentable’?”

the train allowed him a couple minutes to recover before gliding up to the station. you saw atsumu tilting his head towards the opening entrance. “you first,” was all he said.

“if you’re letting me go first, that means i’m taking the window seat.”

atsumu winked, “that was the plan.”

“how amicable,” you mused, grinning. for a moment, you had thought he was the type to fight with you over the treasured spot. good thing he wasn’t, it made the trip much more enjoyable for you.

stepping into the train, you immediately looked for your seats. you paused at a row, preparing to scooch inside when atsumu’s palm landed on your elbow. he gently redirected you farther down the aisle, saying something along the lines of, “people don’t usually use that word to describe me.” it was either that or a comment on how silly you were for mistaking your seats. you weren’t sure which one it was. he was making you feel ticklish.

afterwards, you wasted no time getting into your seat by the large window. atsumu slipped into the seat to your right, hanging his backpack on the seat in front of him. he stretched while the announcement declared the destination and safety policies. when the train began to pick up speed, atsumu leaned backwards with a lazy expression. “looks like you’re stuck with me for three hours.”

you repositioned in your seat until you were comfortable. you replied, “then let’s make sure to get along during that time.”

he inclined his head towards you, a mischievous smile dancing on his features. “obviously. but how will i know you won’t take incriminating pictures of me while i sleep?”

“please,” you scoffed. “like i would want pictures of you to fill my camera roll.”

“people kill to take my pictures!”

you felt yourself loosen up. this interaction—chit-chatting about irrelevant things—made you think of your friends. you were reminded of the comforting feeling you felt when you were with them at the cafe. the endless stream of inane conversations, their faces full of sweet mirth. you found it ridiculous how much things have changed. you would’ve never imagined the day when you’d be able to talk so casually with atsumu miya. you had hated him only a couple weeks ago.

“thank you, atsumu, for agreeing to come.” it might’ve came out of nowhere, but you meant it. you don’t remember how long you contemplated your choices last night; you only remember wanting to take him to your hometown. it was the most grueling decision ever: a three hour trip to your favorite place on earth or heading somewhere closer and more practical.

but you were on a mission. the latter option wouldn’t have held a candle to where atsumu had brought you. it was hard to beat a hidden gem, aka a rundown record store (that magically has every album in the world) right next to a beautiful beach.

you just know he’ll be amazed when he sees the place that raised you. it was a small town but notable for being bathed in tranquility. everywhere you look there'll be luscious greenery. random flowering hedges decorated the neighborhood, painting the area in vibrant shades. in the spring there would be colorful peonies; in the fall hydrangeas would take over. if you visited during sakura season, you could go sightseeing. if you were lucky enough, the residents would host a (typically unplanned) local festival for the children to enjoy.

it’s been a while since you last visited. this would be the perfect opportunity for the both of you—the only problem was getting atsumu to agree.

you fidgeted. “i know it’s far away but it’s worth it, i promise.”

atsumu shot you a confused look. “if i didn’t want to come, i would’ve told you last night, silly.” a typical atsumu answer. you should’ve known better than to worry, it was just who he was. atsumu doesn’t do things half-heartedly. if he decides to do something, it’s because he wants to. and he’ll see his decision through to the end.

“good,” you exhaled. “i even messaged you late at night to improve my chances.” he quirked a brow and you explained, “people are more easily persuaded during nighttime.” the truth burned your cheeks. it was even more embarrassing since he was sitting only a couple inches away from you.

atsumu blinked until the realization dawned on him. “when they’re tired, am i right?” he added with a laugh. “you’re scary.”

“that’s a good thing,” you sighed with relief. “if it’s coming from you, it’s a compliment.”

“whatever you say,” he cooed and rested his head against his seat.

for a moment, you don’t say anything. you were no stranger to atsumu and his confusing actions, but recently it’s become intensified. you noticed it during the first day of filming: his gazes were longer and more purposeful, even his way of talking was strange. whether it was to you or about you, there was always a soothing, melodic ring to his voice.

you hadn’t noticed it until jolie pointed it out. actually, it seemed the entire cast of “that summer” knew except you. jolie, sugawara, and akane exploded when they realized. semi was just there, too busy going through the script to care or engage.

the three would nudge one another with cheeky smiles, and at a certain point, you were sure they were sending secret messages through their indiscernible gazes. their behaviors didn’t bother you though. you didn’t even stop to ponder what caused the change in your co-star. you were just happy they were having fun.

atsumu rested his chin between his index finger and thumb. he said, “i’ll keep your scary technique in mind. maybe i’ll use it on ‘samu.” when silence took over, leaving nothing but the roaring of train tracks, he went on to explain, “‘samu’s my twin brother.”

your eyes widened drastically. this was your first time hearing about this. even if you remember atsumu vaguely from your volleyball manager days, his teammates were blurry faces in your memory. was “‘samu” on the same team as him? now you were curious.

“is he staying in tokyo?”

“yeah, he lives there with his onigiri restaurant by the studio.”

your hands clapped together in excitement. “that’s amazing! i should stop by sometimes. my friends are big foodies.”

“you’re giving me that look,” he grimaced. “now i have to give you the location.”

“you really are amicable,” you smiled. he groaned briefly, saying, “don’t tease.”

“do you get along well with him?”

atsumu’s grumbling was replaced with a noise of amusement. “not at all. we’re not cut from the same fabric or anything like that.”

“cloth,” you corrected.

“same thing! he gets on my nerves.”

you had a feeling he was lying and you wondered how close they actually were; after all, how nice is it that your twin brother’s restaurant is near your studio?

“that’s nice, i don’t have any siblings to fight with,” you daydreamed.

“i assure you, having one isn’t fun.”

“must be hard being identical twins. what’s he like?”

atsumu huffed with tight arms crossed over his chest. “average. the only thing saving him is that he has my face.”

“don’t be rude. he has an onigiri restaurant.”

atsumu took off his denim cap to ruffle his hair. he mumbled, “why are you so interested in him anyway?”

“i’m just curious,” you laughed. this was really getting to him. “i am an only child after all.”

the two of you didn’t continue the conversation after that. atsumu’s head was turned away from you, potentially lost in the music blaring from his earbuds. you opted to look at the passing landscape instead. small grassy hills zoomed by and sometimes you even saw nearby towns in the distance.

you busied yourself with that until you couldn’t anymore. the silence was excruciating. you would fall asleep if only your adenosine receptors were working. it’s only been an hour into the ride and you were bored out of your mind.

truth be told, there was a thought that’s been bothering you ever since the first day of filming. if you were going to say something to quell your discomfort, it might as well be this.

“atsumu, i have a question.” he turned in an instant, plucking out his earbuds to hear you properly. “the staff members—do you get along with them?”

his questioning gaze pierced through you until he dipped his head in contemplation. “i don’t go out of my way to talk to them unless i have to if that’s what you’re asking. why? are you not getting along with them?”

you shook your head. “actually, it’s the other way around. they were… saying stuff about you, atsumu.”

honestly, you hadn’t meant to be there. you were only passing by when you overheard a group of people talking rather loudly. you were already walking away until you heard what the topic of the conversation was about.

it started with simple gossip. some talked about how it’s been over a year since atsumu last worked on a project; others mentioned his past relationship with his ex. then it suddenly became disturbing to listen to them. left and right you heard people asperse your co-star for his overbearing attitude.

cocky, pretentious, surly—you could go on forever. standing there, a part of you agreed with them. atsumu miya was an incredibly irascible and blunt person; he was wickedly cruel, but that didn’t mean he deserved to be berated so casually by those who worked with him. it was one thing to have opinions, but another to be unprofessional about it.

he’s cocky, yes, but that wasn’t all there was to him. how could they sum him up in just one word? it was ridiculous to you.

“and?” atsumu said in a low voice. “screw them, let them say what they want to say.”

“you’re not bothered? the staffs—”

his eyes were narrowed now, and he leaned in to say, “i couldn’t care less about what they say about me. you should know that it’s different in this industry, y/n. people only believe what they want to believe; they only listen to what they want to hear.”

your lips thinned in frustration. you were completely speechless. atsumu tilted away from you slowly, dragging a tensed hand across his face. you barely caught his next words: “but that doesn’t mean i want you to hear them.”

your brows knitted together. “what do you mean?”

“you know exactly what i mean.”

“no, i don’t,” you pressed, leaning slightly over the armrest that separated the two of you.

you watched as he opened his backpack, pulling out a gray jacket. “i’m tired, y/n. wake me up when we get there.” when you opened your mouth to complain, he threw the jacket towards you.

“sleep.” he pointed to the jacket on your lap with a scowl. “use that if you get cold. night.”

you watched as he turned in his seat, getting situated to fall asleep. you stared at him in disbelief, there was no way you were going to sleep now.

“what happened to you?” atsumu chuckled from behind. you ignored him, stepping off the train and onto the ground. you didn’t get a wink of sleep on the ride, and it was equally frustrating how your co-star could tell.

you started walking to the right while eyeing the time on your phone. atsumu caught up quickly, his long strides irking you. “so, where are we heading first?”

you closed your phone and peered up at him. “should we go eat?”

“sure. you’re in charge today after all.”

“then i’ll lead us there. i’ll pay for the meal too.”

his hand shot up instantly. “i’m paying. don’t fight it, y/n, i insist.”

“then you’re paying for the snacks too,” you grinned.

“so this was your plan the whole time…” he said. what could you say? you were an opportunist.

as the two of you continued on, you were flooded with nostalgic memories. your hometown was surrounded by earthy hills and fields of grass that stretched for miles on end. you’d spent most of your childish summers running through those green fields. sometimes you’d get scolded by nearby farmers for your recklessness, then get invited to their wooden engawa where they spoiled you with fresh cut up fruit. (it was a small price to pay.)

speaking of farmers, you waved to a group of them in the fields. they all looked up from their sun hats and said in excitement, “if it isn’t our little y/n!”

atsumu inclined his head to catch your flustered expression, a smile tugging at his lips.

“they all knew me when i was little,” you explained. “they helped watch me when my parents were busy.”

he hummed. “this place is pretty small. i’m not surprised they’re all familiar with one another.”

a soft chuckle. “you’re right about that. you could say the whole town was there to witness my first everything.”

you don’t notice his gaze softening. “you grew up well, y/n.”

when the two of you headed farther into town, you stopped by a local restaurant. everyone greeted you with warm smiles, chanting, “welcome back,” or “it’s y/n!” in excitement. even the owner stepped out to give you a big hug. (poor atsumu felt left out.)

once you actually got to sit down and look at the menu, you realized you never asked for atsumu’s preferences. you just hoped he wasn’t too picky. despite the numerous times you’ve come with your friends, you still take forever to decide on your meal. it seems you’re not alone in this: atsumu shares the same level of indecisiveness as you.

after eating, atsumu paid and you reluctantly left the restaurant. you strolled down the neighborhood with him by your side, passing small family-owned businesses that lined both sides of the streets. growing up in a small town meant that distinguishing between houses and shops was hard. families tended to use the first floor of their home as stores due to convenience. you knew because your family ran a convenience store below your second floor.

when you pointed this out to atsumu, he bursted out laughing. “you really did grow up well. you were living the life that every child wanted, you know that?”

you shrugged. “sure my parents let me eat whatever i wanted from the store, but they took that privilege away after seeing me experiment with the food.” growing up this way was probably the trigger for your fondness towards food.

“like what?” he asked. you counted on your fingers, “vanilla ice cream in ramen, chips dipped in chocolate—make sure it’s sea salt! then—“

“okay, okay. i get the point.” his face twisted in disgust. “are we gonna visit your parents’ shop then?”

your smile froze and you lowered your gaze to the ground, “my parents aren’t—”

suddenly you heard an abrupt shout. the two of you turned around frantically in the direction of the voice. you watched as two kittens skidded by, they ran through the alley in lightning quick steps and you stared with your mouth hung open. atsumu tapped on your shoulder to redirect your attention: a middle-aged woman was running out from a nearby store with a distraught expression.

she ran until she came to a stop right in front of you. resting her hands on her knees, she gasped exhaustedly for air. you and atsumu glanced at one another. when the woman looked up, familiarity struck you.

“aunt april!” your hand came to cover your mouth. it’s been over a year since you last came to visit, and you blamed it on your hectic schedule. filming your last project, vengeance, had turned you into a workaholic zombie.

however, the woman in front of you hasn’t changed one bit. curly gray hair still sat neatly on top of her head—styled just the way you remembered—and she was still wearing the dainty earrings you gifted her years ago.

the store she came running out from was her store.

you saw her eyes widened, excitement and relief swirling in them. “y/n! you’re back, how long has it been?” she glanced to your left, a grin overtaking her features. “let me guess, this is… that kuroo guy, isn’t it? it’s hard to see with his cap in the way,” she mumbled.

you and atsumu shared another glance. april went on, leaning from side to side to capture all his angles. “can’t be the orange haired guy—this one’s too tall. can’t be kenma either, he’s always slouching.”

you moved slowly to place yourself in between her and atsumu; if you didn’t stop her, she would’ve gone on forever. you laughed nervously, “no, auntie, none of my friends are with me today.”

you saw her face tip in disappointment. it was an annual routine for you and the group: visiting your hometown every fall to watch the hydrangeas bloom and have picnics in the fields. everytime you came, they did well to familiarize themselves with all the residents. now they have a hopelessly loving connection to your hometown, and the residents look forward to seeing them visit again every year.

“then…” april sidestepped you to scrutinize atsumu again. you saw him straighten his back, his signature charming smile present. “is he your boyfriend?”

you don’t get a chance to speak. “you never told me you had one! well you haven’t been in a relationship since sato. did i tell you he came to visit last spring? poor guy was hoping he’d see you again.”

“auntie, wait!” the woman turned at your sudden hastiness. “the kittens—you were chasing them, right?”

“the kittens!” horror washed over her face and she staggered backwards. atsumu reached out to place a steady hand on her shoulder. “they sprinted away when i wasn’t looking. those rascals…”

atsumu tilted his head towards you, whispering, “we wasted a lot of time already, they might not be around anymore.”

you stared at april anxiously, weighing your options. you didn’t know what was going on, but you were confident the kittens were important to her. plus, you haven’t seen her in a year, how could you turn a blind eye to the woman that basically raised you? plus… the kittens could get extremely hurt!

“i’ll help find them,” you said. atsumu’s stare burned through you and you sent him an apologetic glance. april tried to shut you down, forcing a smile on her wrinkly complexion. you reassured her, “please, i want to help.”

“you can’t! you’re on a trip.” insistent hands were placed on both sides of her hips and she furrowed her gray eyebrows. you knew this stance: she wasn't going to be easily convinced.

“aunt april, you have a store to manage. you shouldn’t be running in the heat,” you said.

“your uncle is covering for me,” she huffed. you reached out to place both hands on her shoulders, ushering her back to the store. you said hastily, “uncle! that’s right! you have to tell uncle that i’m here—he’ll be so excited to see me again. you know how he gets when he thinks he’s being left out.”

her brows pinched together. “you have a point… alright then, but don’t overdo it, alright?”

you nodded quickly, watching as she headed back inside. though she didn’t leave completely, not until she was able to give you a plastic bag filled with cat treats.

when you were finally alone with atsumu, you stood there with guilt swallowing you. “i’m sorry, atsumu, you don’t have to help. you should wait inside the store, or if that’s too uncomfortable, there’s a bench at the fro—“

his heavy sigh cut you off. “you are so rash, you know that? i said you were in charge today, so if you want to go find some kittens, then obviously i’ll help too. it’ll be quicker with two people anyway.”

“wow,” you clasped your hands together in awe. “you really are amicable.”

“stop saying that,” he groaned. “just go look for the kittens, and listen to your aunt. don’t overdo things.” you were about to complain when he reached for the treats inside the bag. then he pointed down the street and rushed off.

this wasn’t how you thought the trip would go, but desperate times called for desperate measures. you just hoped atsumu won’t get hopelessly lost.

you spent the first fifteen minutes running around, checking behind flower pots and cardboard boxes. you searched through alleyways and even asked nearby residents if they saw two kittens—one orange, one white—dashing around. it wasn’t until later that you saw white fur sticking out from behind a bush.

“there you are.”

it took some coaxing to leer it out but you could tell it was just frightened. you cradled the kitten in your arms. “you look just like snowball,” you smiled. “now then… where could atsumu be…?”

masterlist ⌒☆ previous ⌒☆ next

fun facts:

atsumu took pictures of the restaurant menu and sent it to osamu to annoy him.

y/n's hometown is actually the worst for those who have allergies (so sorry).

TEACH ME HOW TO LOVE! ｡ｏ♡ an atsumu miya smau

a/n: shoutout to may bc she kept up with my writer's block and made sure i wrote everyday...

taglist is open! dm or ask to be a part of it! (those bolded were unable to be tagged)

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yenonnoff · 7 days

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apparently i can’t shut up so now ch21 has 5.1k words and im not even done

dw!! it’ll be split into two chapters bc this is taking forever 😔😔

#♪ yen talks #🎥: tmhtl updates #uh oh #i actually Can’t shut up like i keep writing #Hope it’s worth it though 🤕

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yenonnoff · 11 days

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god i love bokuaka i love hinata i love all of them

#♪ yen talks #sorry i was on pinterest #their fanart are so cute :((

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yenonnoff · 12 days

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h. iwaizumi — my time is important | part 3 (finale)

pairing: iwaizumi x gn!reader

content: mini smau series, university au, swearing, crack, fluff, friends to lovers

synopsis: you've always been a devoted volunteer; the university's bulletin board where all volunteer opportunities are posted, might as well become your second home. however, competition is high. iwaizumi hajime seems to appear out of nowhere and mercilessly fights over the last spot with you every time! why is a busy volleyball player like him spending so much time stealing your spot anyway?

a/n: dates are inaccurate but times are mostly consistent (word count: 6.8k pls forgive me)

...my time is important | part 1, part 2, part 3 (finale)

endless chatter. countless voices spilled onto the walls and tables of the cafeteria.

osamu occupied the seat next to you, his twin brother sitting on the other side. atsumu yawned, his outstretched arms almost knocked over your food.

“hey,” you frowned.

atsumu had annoyed you yesterday with one of his antics and you haven’t fully forgiven him for it. you couldn’t believe what you were reading when you saw his post about you and hajime. it’s safe to say you haven’t forgotten the incident and he hasn’t forgotten his lecture.

atsumu retracted his arms hastily, a playful “oops” escaping his lips. after another lazy yawn he asked, “do you think he saw the post?”

“no, hajime isn’t active on twitter,” you replied. “he only goes to check his messages sometimes.”

your response garnered a whistle from atsumu. “a true hajime expert,” he smiled.

sometimes you wished you could just throw him into an arena of lions and watch as he struggled. many times you thought this, however this time you were just being unfair. you were upset about how ironic the situation was. you know hajime so well and yet you haven’t properly talked to him in weeks.

sure there were fleeting moments: waves in the hallways, brief exchanges of smiles, but never full on conversations. none in person, none in text (at least none that didn’t involve the topic of upcoming volunteer events). rarely you’d stop him and engage in idle chit chat, but like always he was whisked away shortly after.

the universe was playing tricks on you. the desire to talk to him—ask about his day randomly, how his volleyball practice was, or simply talk to him without needing a reason—grew and grew. it would be unusual if you discussed these things with him. after all, you were just friends.

but you wanted to know. you wanted to ask him how he got into volleyball, ask about his high school experiences. you wanted to ask about him. was that so wrong? if you can’t do that as friends then you don’t want it.

you watched blankly as your food slid towards the right, osamu’s lunchbox coming into view.

“you’ve been distracted a lot lately, y’know that?” he said.

you smiled sheepishly. “yeah, i know.”

“here.” osamu opened his lunchbox and revealed pieces of homemade dumplings. you weren’t surprised at the display. he always made his meals from scratch and was working towards developing his own recipes. he even folded the dumplings in various fun styles. his skills truly know no bounds.

you were one of his many taste testers, and as always, there was nothing to complain about his cooking. while there’s always room for improvement, you were cont—

“this needs more salt,” atsumu said mid way through chewing.

you and osamu both looked at him. leave it to atsumu to ruin the mood.

“talk or chew, don’t do both,” you scolded.

“who said you could eat one anyway?” osamu asked, sliding his lunchbox back towards him.

atsumu swallowed the food. he pouted when his brother swatted his grabby hands away from the dumplings. he continued to frown, “oh c’mon. you know i have superior taste buds.”

“what does that even mean?” his twin sent him a look.

as they bantered, you finished packing up the remainder of your food, stuffing the container into your backpack. the two stared at you when you stood up, confusion evident in their eyes.

“you’re leaving already?”

you shrugged. “might as well get to bio early.”

you waved them goodbye and walked away from the table. the twins were going to leave soon anyway. usually you’d join them on their walk around campus or hang out with them and suna in the music room, but not today.

osamu’s words came rushing back to you: “you’ve been distracted a lot lately…”

you couldn’t deny it. this was starting to get out of hand.

in the corner of your eye you saw him. hajime iwaizumi, who you’d met coincidentally in front of your university’s bulletin board. he sat at a table a little further down from yours, his body facing your direction. he was grinning cheerfully—a rare occurrence but a striking one. you swear his gaiety could light up the whole room.

you saw the corners of his eyes crinkle. he was paying close attention to whatever seth was saying or doing—honestly you weren’t too sure. everyone else was blurred out, your focus was set only on hajime.

he laughed again.

your heart thumped chaotically and you found yourself wondering what was so funny. for a moment you’d wished you had made him laugh like that. even tooru who sat next to seth was pouting, upset that seth had said a good joke and not him.

then hajime shifted and glanced your way. first came his softened gaze, then a wave in your direction.

vermillion kissed your cheeks. you waved back hurriedly and beelined for the exit. hajime had caught you staring.

for the entirety of biology you couldn’t concentrate. your heart was still hammering against your chest and hajime stubbornly occupied all your thoughts.

the next day was solely dedicated to preparing for the festival. it’s an annual event that requires the full participation of every department; it’s an annual event that many students dread.

there are mixed feelings when it comes to the festival: the first half—setting up booths and decorations; navigating through the tight storage room; and working hectically in the heat—is a pain in the ass. this part requires the most heavy lifting and students despise the amount of work needed to be done. however, the later half—the festival fully decorated and finished with large crowds of people roaming the campus—is a wonderful sight. since admission is free to all students, they tend to have a field day after all their work.

as for you, you enjoyed every single part of the festival (both the beginning and the finished product). being able to provide assistance to other people brings you joy. the festival is just like volunteering except with the bonus of being surrounded by friends and classmates. what more could you ask for?

others were less optimistic however. all departments at Tokyo University were responsible for setting up food stands or activities. the profit made by each department goes to their respective budget; you’ve witnessed just how intense the competition gets between the different stands. the thought sends a chill down your spine.

certain departments like art, fashion design, and theatre are able to host exhibits and shows. essentially they’re exempt from having to run around in the boiling heat. but the most exciting part of the festival has to be the music concerts. last year, there were symphony orchestra and jazz band performances; this year, it’s opened up to students. your dear friend suna and his band are going to perform, and you can barely contain your excitement.

today is only preparation. the real panicking starts tomorrow, the opening day that lasts from 1 to 6pm.

you could already hear the groans of agony from students as you left your dorm. you couldn’t blame them, honestly you were sure you’ll be complaining later on as well. after all… your department along with a couple others were selected for the afternoon shift. unbelievable. extremely unfortunate.

shifts only last three hours at most and departments take turns setting up the festival. you couldn’t imagine spending the entire day trying to dig up dusty banners in the crammed storage room. still, three hours is a long time. your department just had to be picked for the shift when the sun’s at its highest. even osamu and seth weren’t this unlucky: their time slot was from 9am to 12pm. they bragged about it when they finished, sending you a selfie of them eating somewhere.

you arrived to see clusters of students spread all around campus. you rushed to sign in and meet with a Board of Activities member. the morning shift had already set up booths and stands, assembling games and activities. they had done all the basic ground work. the afternoon shift was responsible for organizing the storage room and preparing boxes of decorations and lights for the evening shift. then all they would have to do is unpack everything, set up banners and posters, and test the lights hung around the festival.

The BoA member gave you your first task: join the others in sweeping and cleaning the storage room. it didn’t take very long. everyone basically half-assed it, the room was going to become disordered and neglected again after the festival anyway. the next task was checking what decorations were available in the storage room. you were given a list of items and were instructed to find the boxes containing them. even with a group of people it took an extensive time to search the massive room. however your shift was quickly coming to a close; there was only one more task but you and the others were already drenched in sweat. hot air was constantly rushing into the storage room and it didn’t help that people were coming in more than they were leaving.

you gave yourself a pat on the back when you finally finished. the urge to take a nap and an hour-long break was strong, but there was only one more task before everyone could go home. at least the board was generous with their snacks and drinks.

when the last task came you weren’t sure if you should feel happy or exhausted. all the boxes that were checked on the list needed to be lugged to the front of the campus where it would be unpacked and assembled. it was the last task and the most laborious one at that. at least you could finally get some fresh air. you would be escaping from the suffocating and humid storage room, but your arms and legs would make you pay later.

students shuffled out of the room with boxes in their hands; many needed a partner, the trip was going to be a long and tiring one. you felt your arms grow weak just by watching your fellow schoolmates. it wasn’t like you could sit by and do nothing; BoA members were present in the room and they take preparations seriously.

you wouldn’t have minded doing the evening shift. putting up some posters and hanging silly banners didn’t sound so bad!

you could only sigh and lament on your terrible luck. you went to inspect the lightest box. someone else can get the heavier ones, it wasn’t like you had a partner to help you carry it anyway.

then voices and laughter distracted you.

it came from outside the storage room but was approaching closer and closer. suddenly you saw atsumu and other familiar faces step into the room. with his signature smug expression, atsumu waved at the BoA members. even from the back you could hear his obnoxious voice.

“yo! we’re finished with everything so we came to help.”

you shook your head in disbelief. usually he would run away from any unnecessary and taxing tasks, but look at him acting all righteous. you wondered who actually brought up the idea of helping the other group in the storage room. you would have to thank them since—

oh.

oh. he was here.

you weren’t sure why you hid, your body automatically reacted when you saw hajime enter the room. was that why atsumu was here? you were sure he had some ulterior motive.

more people were entering the space. they barely looked out of breath or covered in sweat. you turned to check the area that you were in: all the way in the back where the boxes were. there were only two or three people with you there. you needed to leave, exit the room before hajime could see you.

your thumping heart was betraying you. you knew how you felt. you were happy to see that hajime had the same shift as you; truth be told, you were hoping that he did the entire time. but not now. you couldn’t talk to him here, this wasn’t the right time or place. you needed to leave.

grabbing the lightweight box from earlier, you made sure to avoid hajime who was walking on the other side of the industrial shelves. you nearly escaped when you forgot about your annoying blond haired friend. he was still talking to the BoA member by the door, clearly trying to avoid helping out. when he turned and saw you, you regretted not staying put. everything was becoming a mess.

“y/n!” he’d sounded shocked but you weren’t convinced. he beamed, “if it isn’t my favorite person in the whole world.”

“liar. you said seth was your favorite last week.”

he winked. “this is a secret, don’t tell him.”

you rolled your eyes. compared to yours, his hair barely looked tousled. he wasn’t sweating profusely either (which actually might be a good thing). you attempted to sidestep him but he cut you off when you were about to say “goodbye.”

you stared at him. “what are you doing?”

“nothing!”

perhaps you should’ve pushed him out of the way. you should’ve distracted him and left, tell him that a pretty girl was coming and get him to turn away. but you didn’t. you fell right into atsumu’s traps.

footsteps approached you from behind and a familiar voice made you freeze in place. “y/n?” he called you. hajime was right behind you.

you couldn’t pay attention to what atsumu was saying. your eyes widened and your legs felt weak.

then, out of nowhere, atsumu snatched your box and flashed you a cheeky smile. you wanted to chase after him as he left the storage room, but hajime was watching from behind. that sneaky fox used him as a buffer! you weren’t going to forget this.

you peered over your shoulders and there he was. you felt a sense of deja vu standing so close to him in such a familiar place. the two of you were together during last year’s festival preparations as well. this’ll mark the second year.

“hi, hajime.” you hoped he didn’t notice the falter in your voice.

“hi, how have you been?” he asked and your shoulders lost their tension. why were you so nervous in the first place? there was nothing to worry about when you were with hajime.

“i’m fine.” you have no idea what’s happened since the last time we talked. “are you here to help us?”

he nodded. “i came to ask where the boxes were and saw you. i didn’t know you’d be here.”

he didn’t, but someone else did. someone who wasn’t going to get away with trapping you like this.

you weren’t ready to talk to hajime. you didn’t even know what to talk about. however you had to admit, this was the moment you’ve been hoping for. maybe it wasn’t too late to start remembering everything you’d wanted to tell him the past two weeks.

you tilt your head towards the back. “it’s this way, i’ll show you.”

“where were you guys before this?” that was the first question you wanted to ask him.

hajime chuckled, “a lot of places.”

the two of you were crouched in front of the boxes, both procrastinating on doing the task. the world seemed to slow down, the shuffling of feet in and out felt like a distant noise in the background. you both gazed at one another: hajime—who barely seemed fazed by the hot and humid room—and you—who felt time stopping, your stomach doing backflips at the way he looked at you.

“we were inside most of the time,” he elaborated. “we helped move some of suna’s band stuff into the assembly room, hung out for a bit, and then got caught by a BoA member.”

you stifled a laugh and said, “of course that happened.”

“then we were ushered to the black box and instructed to organize the backstage.”

your hand shot up at this. hajime raised a brow and watched you intently. “so while you were going from room to room with proper air conditioning, we were burning alive in this storage room?”

you stared at him with narrowed eyes and an envious frown. it wasn’t hajime’s fault but still; you wanted to visit the band room and black box too, perhaps even relax under the aircon before getting caught.

the corners of hajime’s lips curled upwards. it was subtle but you were close enough to see it. the motion sent an chilling shock through your body. your cheeks burned—either from the stuffy atmosphere or from your dark haired friend.

“it’s not as amazing when you realize how picky the theatre director was. she was basically supervising our every move.”

“oh,” you felt a wave of sympathy. “that sounds terrible.”

“can’t blame her. those props looked expensive.”

this triggered an old memory of yours, when you and the twins snuck backstage and atsumu carelessly grabbed an intricate looking sword. he swung it around like a small child who had just won a trophy. little did the three of you know, the sword was actually excalibur and was needed for a musical. nothing was damaged or broken, but you all learned a valuable lesson that day.

thinking back to that time, you realized how impulsive you were as a first-year. you laughed quietly to yourself, not realizing that hajime was still in front of you. he watched the smile creep onto your face and his features softened.

“that reminds me,” he said suddenly, “our group got to see glimpses of the rehearsal. the skits are cool, you should check them out tomorrow.”

“now you’re just showing off.”

“we also checked out the art departm—“

you nudged hajime with your shoulder. a mistake. you were both still in a crouching position and collapsed onto the floor. a thud reverberated through the room and the two of you erupted into laughter. somewhere along in the conversation you had forgotten about the blazing heat and beads of sweat that tickled down your back.

hajime helped you up to your feet, a slight grin still present on his face. you couldn’t believe you thought he was scary when you first met. standing at that bulletin board in the middle of the hallway, you thought he was intimidating—unapproachable with that surly scowl on his face. but there was more to him than you could ever imagine. you wanted to know him more; that grin of his carved a soft spot in your heart.

when you looked around, the storage room was deserted. there was only the two of you and two remaining boxes that laid on the floor. they’ve been waiting to be picked up. how long was your conversation anyway?

you chuckled hesitantly. “uh oh. looks like we should bring these out quickly.”

the walk to the front of the campus was unbelievably short. hajime listened as you rambled about trivial things: the show you watched before falling asleep last night; how ridiculous your professors were; and the meal that osamu made you last week.

the two of you arrived, passing a couple students on the way that were fanning themselves with their hands.

when hajime responded, you knew the conversation had ended. “i’d like to try that,” was all he said.

you laid the boxes on the ground, careful not to brush your fingers against the hot concrete. you heard a sigh from your left and turned. you shielded your eyes from the sun with your hand. hajime was staring at his phone, thin lines forming in between his furrowed brows.

“what’s wrong?”

he glanced your way, his hard expression easing. “it’s just oikawa.” a pause. “if you see him around, please cover for me or just ignore him.”

you tilted your head in confusion. you were about to comply when a blaring whistle caught the both of you off guard. silence, and then another one.

hajime smiled, “or not.”

once again you heard the groans of students as they scattered across campus. they weren’t groans of agony this time, they were sounds of relief. the whistle signaled the end of the afternoon shift; all tasks were checked and completed.

wait—you thought—not yet. not now.

things were starting to become normal again. there was so much more you wanted to talk to hajime about; you feared you wouldn’t have another chance after this.

you wanted to stay with him just a little longer but your body was betraying you. your legs ache and a throbbing pain was coursing through your brain. you needed a shower and a nap desperately. even if you could stay, you weren’t selfish enough to keep hajime here. while he didn’t show it, you knew he was exhausted.

crowds of students dispersed: some went back to their dorms, some went to eat, and some stayed. those with the evening shift were coming—there was no reason to stay anymore.

“y/n.” hajime called to get your attention. “are you going back to your dorm?”

you nodded.

“do you want me to walk you there?”

you swallowed hard. you never noticed how much affection he poured into his words when he was talking to you. it’s hard to notice but it’s there. your eyes traveled to his shirt where he neatly rolled up his sleeves, revealing his biceps. he was bothered by the heat after all.

you smiled at him. “i’ll be fine. thanks for the offer.”

then with a nod he left. “see you later, y/n.”

a part of you was elated thinking about the next time you’d be able to talk to him. the other part wondered if it’ll actually happen. he’d said the same thing last time and what happened? you were stuck running around in a loop, all your efforts and attempts completely shut down.

you watched hajime leave, the distance between the two of you growing more gradually. the sight left a bitter taste in your mouth. you didn’t want this. you had already come to your conclusion about your feelings towards hajime; you were just too cowardly to act on them.

he makes you feel a certain way: a desire to be close to him, hear him talk, and see him smile and laugh. you’ve never felt this way towards anyone before and that’s why you didn’t tell him. you endured weeks of pretending that everything was normal—that you were both okay with being just friends.

you were a coward, afraid that the feelings blooming in your chest would tarnish the friendship you had with him. if things didn’t work out and you had to go separate ways, you didn’t think you could handle that. not talking for weeks was bad enough; not knowing him at all felt hellish.

so you sealed away your feelings, or at least attempted to. hajime made it difficult for you to do so. everything suddenly reminded you of him and without knowing it, your feelings grew heavy in your heart until you felt it would burst.

you should’ve put an end to this a long time ago but you still had a chance. tomorrow was the festival and the perfect opportunity to confess. you’d swallow your cowardice and tell hajime your feelings. you’d face him and he’d give you his undivided attention as always.

if it’s with hajime, then you want to try.

on the day of the festival you arrived two hours before it opened.

you saw students scrambling from one place to another; it wasn’t as crowded as yesterday since coming today wasn’t mandatory. students in departments that were operating food stands or activities needed to come to organize their stations. it was ultimately their responsibility and no one else’s.

though not everyone needed to come. it only applies to those unfortunate enough to get selected or those with enough compassion to volunteer.

you came early for no particular reason. scratch that—you came hoping you’d see hajime again. you heard from tooru that he’d be here, but what did you expect when the universe’s hobby was to watch you get your hopes up? you haven’t seen him all day and it’s been weighing on your mind.

you worked under a canopy tent with the sides and back covered. kneeling over a plastic bag, you didn’t notice two sets of footsteps approaching.

“y/n!”

your head whipped to the side, your excitement giving you away.

“woah,” atsumu teased. “were you expecting someone else? what’s with the mopey expression?”

in a single moment your eagerness was wiped away and replaced with boredom. you saw atsumu pout; the pure disinterest written all over your face was enough to kill.

you went back to putting pancake mixtures on the foldable tables. “what are you guys doing here anyway?” you wouldn’t be surprised if they were picked to come help—it’s not unlikely that they were both cursed luckless at birth.

“nothing really. we came because everyone else was here,” osamu said.

“so you’re just hanging out?”

atsumu hummed. “what about you?” he was looking at the pancake mixtures on the table, his lips curled up into a smirk.

“helping out,” you said plainly.

“wha—unlucky.”

his sing-song voice received a glare from you. “i’m doing a favor for the art department.”

“and you’re gonna do their job at the festival too?”

you shook your head. when you arrived, some art students came up to you pleading for help. they were short-handed and too busy with the exhibit to set up their food stands. you couldn’t blame their desperation, this was going towards their department budget after all. “they’re coming back and taking over later.”

osamu stepped into the tent, his hands in his shorts’ pockets. curiosity coated his words. “they’re doing something different this year.”

“yeah, they’re making pancakes but you can ask them to draw stuff.”

atsumu came in after his brother, his eyes sparkling with excitement. “woah! like those videos online.”

“you think they’d be down to draw ‘tsumu’s ugly mug?” osamu pondered.

“the hell?! what did i do to you?”

you slide a cardboard box over as the two bantered. you didn’t doubt that they would: money was money and some of them were crushing madly on atsumu. they’d make him look ten times more attractive than he is and it’d unfortunately boost his ego. you shivered at the thought.

atsumu refocused back towards you, having enough of his argument with his brother. “sooo, where’s your lover?”

you stop momentarily. casting your gaze on the ground, silence overtook the tent.

“i don’t know.”

the twins shared a secretive glance at one another. they weren’t sure which was more surprising: you not correcting atsumu or the way you looked so distraught.

then atsumu’s eyes widened and he yelled, “y/n, do you li—”

osamu was quick to nudge atsumu roughly, getting him to shriek and shut up. silence sliced the air again.

“we forgot to mention that we’re looking for him,” osamu said suddenly. he turned to his brother as if trying to communicate a message. atsumu didn’t follow, only raising a puzzled brow and continuing to massage the sore part where he was elbowed.

“who’s we?”

osamu grumbled under his breath. the exchange almost made you crack into a smile.

“seth’s looking for iwaizumi and asked us to help.”

you and atsumu were now staring at osamu. confusion danced in the air.

“oh, okay.” you replied, still unsure where this was going. “oh, that thing!” atsumu bursted into laughter. nervous laughter. you eyed him weirdly as if he were a random stranger that’d just approached you. “i remember now. we seriously couldn’t find him anywhere. am i right?”

“yeah.”

you smiled. osamu didn’t hide his disgust towards his brother.

“y/n, please help find him for us.” atsumu clasped his hands together and peered at you with hopeful eyes. good thing he’s aiming to play volleyball professionally; the acting industry does not need him.

“if you guys can’t find him, what makes you think i can?”

osamu shrugged. “he could be inside. we haven’t checked there yet.”

“but the stand…”

atsumu slapped a hand against his chest. “we can take over,” he cheered eagerly.

with those four words alone you darted to your feet and wiped down your clothes. even if it’s awfully clear that they were lying through their teeth, you weren’t going to say no. this was an excuse to find hajime.

“perfect. just organize the food dye and squeeze bottles. then make sure to check that the pancake makers work properly.” then you were out of there, barely stopping to hear the twins groan with regret.

when you left, atsumu froze in shock at his newfound responsibilities. he didn’t sign up for this.

hajime wasn’t in the art or fashion exhibits. among the paintings and sculptures, mood boards and fashion sketches, you didn’t see anyone that resembled a spiky haired volleyball player. you continued to the theatre department where you didn’t see him either. he wasn’t in the music room; he wasn’t in the cafeteria. at some point you wondered if he had a secret hiding spot on campus somewhere, or if he had the ability to turn invisible.

regardless, you gave up and went back outside. to your surprise, you found seth standing alone by a tent.

“hi, seth. sorry, looks like i can’t find hajime after all.”

he turned around to face you. despite his clear confusion, he still smiled—typical. “what do you mean?”

“nothing,” you laughed tiredly. “this afternoon’s just been very anticlimactic.”

seth crossed his arms in front of his chest. “if you’re looking for hajime, he and tooru went to buy supplies.”

ah. your mouth hung open in realization. that’s why you couldn’t find him anywhere, he wasn’t even on campus. you wished you knew that before walking all over the place.

“is that why tooru wasn’t answering his messages?” you asked.

“oh, that was because some girl asked for his number earlier and the dummy gave it. he’s probably ignoring his phone on purpose.”

you sighed. your friends were hopeless. “that’s good then. at least i know hajime isn’t hiding in a secret spot somewhere.”

“secret spot? oh, no—you’ve got the wrong person. that’d be tooru. he knows a bunch of amazing spots on campus.”

“and he didn’t tell me?” you huffed in disbelief. the two of you shared a laugh before silence washed over the conversation.

“i’ve come to my conclusion, seth. i want to try it, confess how i feel and pray things work out.”

seth didn’t respond at first, only staring up at the sky. today wasn’t as tortuously hot as yesterday; it’s supposed to get cooler later towards the evening. “don’t worry. i know it’ll work out, it’s you and hajime after all.”

“and if things change?”

he smiled. “things are meant to change. even if they’re bad things, just know you tried, y/n.” then you saw mischief swirl in his brown eyes. “so, when did you figure out you like him?”

you blinked at his gleefulness. seth has always been interested in these kinds of topics. you tap a finger against your chin, thinking about an answer to give. truth be told, you're not sure. was there a clear point where you realized it? you thought about hajime’s subtle but warm actions, his honest but comforting words. they’ve always made you feel some sort of way; perhaps your feelings towards him were developing slowly but surely this whole time.

but to answer seth’s question, you could only say, “i’m not sure. my heart’s become weak lately. whenever i see him, it doesn’t know how to act.”

seth’s smile widened when he saw your genuine expression. “yeah, that happens sometimes.”

a sudden notification on his phone disrupted the conversation. one moment he’s all cheery, and the next he’s rushing to type a message. he caught your confused stare and said, “it’s 1pm. rin’s texting me to come to the music room. sorry y/n.”

“music room? suna? for what?”

“oh,” he slipped his phone back into his back pocket. “that’s right, i haven’t told you yet. i’m performing with rin’s band as a guest singer.”

your eyes widened and an excited grin spread across your face. “an aspiring fashion designer who’s popular with everyone, is now performing with suna’s band—what can’t you do?”

“i can’t wait to see you and hajime at the show,” he winked.

you opened your mouth to reply but it never came. you only nodded and waved as he rushed away.

there were still things you wanted to talk about with seth—“what if” questions that still plagued your mind.

but you needed to hurry, the festival was already starting. you could only focus on the thought of getting to see and talk to hajime again.

you hoped at the very least that he’d still smile softly at you.

returning back to the festival was a chaotic nightmare. the campus was drowned in twinkling lights and hoards of people. some were students you recognized, others were random family members and high school students. this is the liveliest you’ve ever seen the festival get. people busied themselves in front of food stands and information booths; they blocked walkways and occupied the limited number of benches around campus.

lively but troublesome. your chances of finding hajime just plummeted to the ground.

you took out your phone and read the time: 3:30pm. before this, you stopped by your dorm to shower and get changed. your notification center was filled with old messages from an hour ago. a majority were from your group chat with the twins.

they had bombarded you with messages and pictures: one was of them with food stuffed in their mouths. you type back an apology and ask them if they’ve seen hajime. atsumu instantly replied: havent seen him

you start making your way down the endless aisle of food stalls. you steered away from large crowds, texting everyone you knew if they’ve seen hajime.

you were desperate. you wanted anything at this point, even a single clue about where he might be.

you stopped to scan your surroundings, a notification catching your eye. it was from osamu and sent to the group chat: i see him hes with oikawa

without skipping a beat you headed towards osamu’s location. you didn’t have a plan, you were going into this head first. you’d have to worry about what to say later, you just wanted to see him right now.

when you stopped again, you saw him standing alone. he was off to the side and away from the crowd.

“hajime,” you said, stepping closer. “you’re a hard person to find.”

he watched as you caught your breath. “were you looking for me?”

yes, you wanted to say. you were looking for him all day.

but you only nodded in response. there was no running away anymore, no more waiting around for something to happen.

“hajime, there’s something i need to tell you.” he nodded and crossed his arms, his unique way of telling you he’s listening. you shook your head. “not here. can we go somewhere else?”

you have no idea where “somewhere else” might be. you saw people every turn that you took. hajime must’ve seen your despaired expression because he pointed you in a different direction: the back of the festival.

it was a grassy field that stretched for miles on end. you’d forgotten about this area, too exhausted and confused to think properly. you saw small groups of people set down picnic blankets and relax in the sun. they were sitting farther down the field and away from the festival. this was the perfect spot to talk to hajime one on one.

when he sat down on the grass, he patted the empty space next to him. you followed him, your heart suddenly heavy in your throat. what are you going to do now?

“is it okay here?”

you hummed in response. no more running away, you reminded yourself. no more waiting either.

“hajime, i’m sorry.” you saw him tilt his head towards you, his gaze intense. “i’m sorry for making you wait so long, sorry for not noticing everything sooner.”

something shifted in his expression then. the small smile that he’d always reserved for you and you only, faltered.

you rushed to clarify but he beat you to it. “so you know.”

yes, you knew. you always wondered what would happen if atsumu hadn’t accidentally told you that day. if he didn't have such a big mouth and if you continued to remain clueless about hajime’s feelings. would he confess? would your relationship never change?

but you were glad to know. you wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for that day.

you confirmed, “i know. i should’ve noticed it sooner; were you going to keep it a secret forever?”

“for as long as i could, yes. but it seems you already found out.”

you shook your head. “i didn’t find out, i was told on accident. i’m sorry. you’ve done so much for me and yet i didn’t even notice how you felt.”

“i did those things because you deserve it, y/n. you deserve that and more. i was fine with just being your friend.”

but what about now? how do you feel about me?

you swallowed the questions in your throat. “thank you for volunteering with me, for everything you’ve done. but—“

the words stopped. you could only look at him.

“but how do you feel now?”

the question barely left as a whisper, you wondered if he could even hear you from where he sat. even now there was distance between the two of you. you were sitting far away from one another.

it was a suffocating question—the answer would be much worse.

it took him a moment to reply. you both sat still but the world around you continued to move. the trees and grass danced in the wind, but your focus was on hajime only.

then he spoke gently. “y/n, do you feel uncomfortable by this? i was scared this would happen so i gave you space.”

space. that explained the distance between you two. everything was for you; he was always thinking about how you felt. god, you felt horrible.

the grass tickled your palm but you could only think about how to end this mess. you wanted to tell him everything: the butterflies he’s given you; the energetic beating of your heart whenever he’s around; and the way you can’t imagine being strangers with him.

distance. you hated it. you wanted to close the gap, reveal everything and hope that he’d accept you still.

you shake your head, hopefully for the last time. “no. i’ve never been uncomfortable by this. i was confused but not anymore.”

you inhaled deeply. “i like you more than you think, hajime. you’re so incredibly kind and patient. i want to try and make this work. if it's with you then there’s nothing to worry about.”

you weren’t sure if that’s what you’re supposed to say, but you hoped he got your message. you poured your feelings out to him. all that’s left to do is wait.

hajime had broken eye contact a long time ago, his focus was elsewhere. your stomach churned at all the poor ways this could end. then, hajime covered his face with his arm. you saw it: the bright smile he tried to conceal and the redness of his cheeks.

“you stole my line, y/n. i was supposed to say that.”

you thought your heart would burst. the sight of him smiling so pleasantly had you frozen in place. your heart really has grown weak.

you grinned at him, a similar reddish hue appearing on your cheeks. the feeling was mutual. everything was okay.

hajime stood from his spot and walked towards you. he lowered his hand and helped you up, just like that time in the storage room. then he interlocked your fingers together, his hand warm and inviting.

when you gave his hand a gentle squeeze, his unoccupied arm went up to cover his face again. you both knew this would take time to get used to.

you heard him mutter a small “thank you,” his face still hidden by his arm.

this was worth it. he was worth all the running around and confusion.

“you can tell me ‘thank you’ when we get to suna and seth’s concert. everyone’s waiting.”

hajime’s gaze fell on your smiling face and he nodded. you wondered how you didn’t notice his feelings before. they were so obvious, a single look into his eyes and you would know.

you also wondered how the others will react when they see this: you hand-in-hand with a flustered hajime. the sight would be priceless and the concert was the perfect way to end everything.

a/n: i am so sorry for the written portion. i was too ambitious. i am also very tired so i hope u liked this! @kqbukimono this one is for u <3

#♪ yen talks #honestly love the way i wrote this :((#my writing has changed SO MUCH #this chapter was so long but so worth it #10/10 love this series love this chapter 😆

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yenonnoff · 14 days

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im troubled

ive been writing in third person for all tmhtl written chapters … but i think itd be better for me to write in second 🤔🤔🤔 i could go back and change the pov but idk if that’ll trouble u guys 🙏 please let me know

#♪ yen talks #i do want to write in second person 😖😖#so if there aren’t any issues with these changes then ill go ahead and alter the written chapters #so many regrets 😓

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yenonnoff · 16 days

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TEACH ME HOW TO LOVE! 20. conversation over coffee

masterlist ⌒☆ previous ⌒☆ next

fun facts:

playing minecraft with everyone is (mostly) peaceful. kenma is the group's designated miner. despite this, stealing is still involved and things get heated really quickly. y/n and shimizu usually decide the location for the base; kuroo wanted an underwater base once but was vetoed 3 to 2. (shoyo thought it would be cool..)

kenma thinks about adopting another cat often. he doesn't go through with it because he believes it'd be too much work.

kenma thinks suzume was good but will not admit it. kuroo was dying of laughter the entire time because of chair; shoyo was just having a good time.

TEACH ME HOW TO LOVE! ｡ｏ♡ an atsumu miya smau

a/n: i was literally just rewatching haikyuu earlier today

taglist is open! dm or ask to be a part of it! (those bolded were unable to be tagged)

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yenonnoff · 16 days

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oh ch20 is so cute

#♪ yen talks #im resurrected guys #back from the dead!#tmhtl update hopefully tonight…#no promises though 🙏🙏

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yenonnoff · 17 days

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TEACH ME HOW TO LOVE! 17. snap out of it!

note: ignore the time stamps they’re weird 😥

masterlist ⌒☆ previous ⌒☆ next

fun facts:

i spent an hour looking for a good picture to use as the background for the poster; then i spent another hour editing and begging may to tell me if it looked good or not. (p.s. he did not give good feedback).

isnt the poster so CUTE UGHHHDH

TEACH ME HOW TO LOVE! ｡ｏ♡ an atsumu miya smau

a/n: hahah aahahaha ive spent so long on this chapter i hope u enjoyed it (im so tired) ALSO theres a bunch of references in this chapter 👀👀

taglist is open! dm or ask to be a part of it! (those bolded were unable to be tagged)

#♪ yen talks #my fav chapter #THEYRE SO CUTE THEYRE SO CUTE #Ch20 is being worked on (spoilers hehe)

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yenonnoff · 21 days