The Legend of King Konrad as a movie poster!
+ different hues at the bottom (insp.)
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flanagan writing the recent brotherband books be like “the oberjarl and svengal and all the guild members and the araluen archers and the three times maktig champion thorn hookyhand and the enemy general with his whole army stationing outside skandia’s gates were all impressed by hal’s fresh perspective and his uncanny ability to come up with a revolutionary plan to completely raze down the enemy.
it all came down to a small detail. hal had to make his way through the impassable-during-this-time-of-the-year mountains in just his underwear to stick a sheep’s bladder on the highest peak so that lydia could then shoot it from the base and strike fear in the enemy’s horses with the thunderous sound of the bladder popping - Pop!
having done that, lydia was required to wear a thin cotton dress that accentuated her slim but curvy body so that the minimum femininity standard displayed over the obviously better masculine side and raised the morale of skandian soldiers.
thanks to ingvar’s superhuman strength and *checks notes* stephen and jasiper holding his spare spectacles, the enemy was taken by surprise and demolished.
they found hal ten days after the battle by the sound of his teeth clattering on the mountain peak. he used the layer of snow that accumulated on his body as a blanket. what a smart boy, erak thought.
stig noticed the tiny movement of hal’s eyeball and knew it meant that hal was glad to see him and thankful for the rescue but, most of all, that he didn’t care for his life as long as skandia was safe. no one else seemed to notice that, but that was just the way of the young skirl, always so humble.
hal slept for 5 months and three days. the herons took turns rubbing his body to bring back the circulation and after months of no response, hal’s lips finally turned from white to pink. true, the young skirl went through hell and back in the mountains, but he was young and healthy and he recovered in no time.
then there was a feast thrown to celebrate hal’s resurrection. this time, lydia didnt know whether to exclaim ‘oh, no! but i have nothing to wear!’ or not, since she wasnt sure if that would be too feminine of her and could possibly put her as an equal to other girls that spent days putting powders on their cheeks and brushing their hair to look half as good as lydia.
thankfully, stig solved the problem for her. ‘just wear that thin cotton dress that accentuates your slim but muscular but still slim body that you always wear,’ he proposed and lydia smiled gratefully. she knew she had to choose between stig and hal and ingvar and rollond that would surely leave his girlfriend if lydia batted her eyelashes at him one day, thanks to her extraordinary beauty that all the female characters had to have to be whole, but today wasnt that day.”
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hi ! I just found your account and I love it so much !! <3
aaa thank you ❤️❤️
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