parents of disabled kids will be like “we know our kid is disabled but we just won’t tell them about it. we don’t want them to think they’re less valuable than other kids. we don’t want them to feel limited by their disability, we want them to know they’re capable of anything.”

meanwhile those kids are growing up thinking “why is everything so much harder for me than it is for everyone else? there’s no reason i shouldn’t be able to just do this. i guess i’m just a failed, broken person.”

Simblr Gratitude Day - The day after

***Long depressing post ahead, proceed with caution 😉***

Yesterday, I wrote this post as my two cents for Simblr Gratitude Day. It apparently resonated with people as it got liked and reblogged so many times I had trouble keeping up with the notifications. ❤️ Thank you to all who interacted with that post.

Considering the number of posts mentioning Simblr Gratitude Day flooding my dash, I'd say the event took off. I myself got two personal comments about the thing I do and was mentioned twice in a post someone else wrote. One of those times someone devoted a paragraph to me (@echoweaver, you've made my day ❤️).

Clearly, my story and I are still, and may forever be, small players on this scene. I'm grateful for the love yesterday's post got, yet the stuff I normally post and really care about, generally doesn't even get 10% of that kind of response. And that gets to me more than I usually let on.

ATOH is my outlet, my passion project. I won't go deep into my personal stuff, but life is mentally tough atm and this story provides an escape, a place to breathe when things get too much. Sharing it is, therefore, always something I do with caution. I pour so much of myself into it, devote so much love and energy to it, that bringing it out into the world is vulnerable. To see people liking it, following it, and sometimes even sharing it means so much more than I can say. At the same time, when it goes unnoticed, that hurts.

I contemplated writing a post yesterday honouring the people whose stories, Sims, or support I value greatly. Because I can think of at least twenty I could dedicate a paragraph as long as my arm to. I didn't. For the sole reason of not wanting to leave out the ones just like myself. In that, I have now left everyone out, and that doesn't feel right either, because I do have words of praise I'd like to some people to hear. So, I'll find my moment to reach out. It's just not now.

I don't want to be all woe-is-me, yet I woke up with mixed emotions about all this and wanted to share this too after being all positive in yesterday's post. Thanks for listening.

God she'd pulled my pants and boxer briefs down while we were spooning and was grinding on me from behind and pushing her cock up against me and spreading my pussy idly with one hand and telling me how soft I was so I rolled over onto all fours bc I Needed her to put it in and. She started fucking me literally TOO deep like I kept jolting away from her without meaning to and she would pull me back against her and slide back in and go for for a couple more strokes because I wasn't telling her to stop or anything before I would get overwhelmed and wiggle away again. And then a couple times she held the tip against me and ordered me to push back on it (which I did bc I'm a Good Boy) and that was. SO fucking hot. Anyway I ended up just dropping to my belly bc I couldn't handle having her hitting my cervix that hard so she made me put my legs together and straddled me and fucked me like that and came in me like 4 times and it was great

(This post is about lesbian sex. DNI if you: are a cishet man, are under 18, do not have your age on your blog, or post ageplay or rape fantasies)

I don’t know if this is a controversial hot take or something a lot of people feel, but I’m tired of hearing people unironically describe Ace Attorney as being “about gay lawyers”. Because it’s not. Do the lawyers act gay? Yes. But that’s not what 99% of the playtime is about.

At the end of the day, Ace Attorney is a satirical story about the corrupt justice system in Japan as represented by a kind-hearted defense attorney protecting (mostly) innocent defendants from having their lives ruined by misguided prosecutors. Its goal was to flip the cultural narrative that defense attorneys are trashy scum who make money off of sympathizing with criminals. And they did this through episodic, goofy murder mysteries.

So where does the gay come in? They wrote some accidentally romantically-charged dialogue, fans were obsessed, and the writers decided, yeah it’s pretty good, let’s do more of that. So they proceeded to toss in more gay side-banter and whatnot amongst the homicide investigations and court sessions.

Now, it’s not like Ace Attorney is the deepest, most poetic social commentary ever written, but it still has a meaningful theme inspired by a real life issue, so it’s pretty discouraging seeing people either not process it or straight up ignore it in favor of “the gay lawyers”. And that’s not even getting into all the other meaningful, non-romantic character relationships that have way more presence in the plot.

I know there will always be uncritical, shipping-brained people in every fandom, but what gets me about how bad it is here is that people who only know as much about AA as what they’ve heard really think it’s “about gay lawyers”. I was watching Drawfee recently, and genuinely all they know about the games is contextualized by Karina’s gay lawyer ship art and brief plot description of how gay the lawyers are. My friend recently told my other friend that Ace Attorney is about gay lawyers to which he was like oh yeah I heard about the unnecessary feelings scene. This is all he knows about the games.

I don’t want to make this sound like a bigger deal than it is, but damn. It truly feels like a lot of people refuse to engage with media in any way that doesn’t involve smashing male characters together like dolls. If you comb through the entirety of the Ace Attorney franchise, you’ll see that such a small fragment of everything that happens is homosexual law, yet that’s the thing that gets amplified to ridiculous proportions. All I can do for now is focus on the posts from fans that love the games themselves just as much if not more than they love the ships.

I never used to understand when people older than me told me "Oh, I used to draw/paint/knit/write but someday I just quit." Being employed, taking care of your relationships, taking care of kids or your elderly Family members is so draining on top of paying bills and trying to hold your life together... Some day you just can't keep up and creativity just leaves you and never comes back.

I am very scared it will happen to me too one day.

And I just work a 40 h job. I don't have kids or pets even. I am a soft millennial I guess.

Ed and Stede making out and rutting wildly and desperately and Ed panting “tell me you want me” stede huffs a laugh “isn’t it obvious?” his knee is between Ed’s thighs after all and they’ve been grinding wantonly and greedily. “I- please just tell me, please say it” Ed is blushing and his huge eyes are looking at Stede like he truly won’t know for sure if Stede doesn’t tell him right now. Stede ducks down a hair’s breadth from Ed lips and breathes, “I want you, Ed. Let me show you how much, love. I need you.” he rolls his hips to punctuate the point and Ed groans, grabbing Stede’s neck, fingers threaded through his hair and pulls him into a bruising kiss.

Me: *opens mouth to complain*

My mind: Now what would Rodney McKay do?

Me: Good point

My mind: :)

Me: *complains even louder*

Updates

btw im gonna clarify now that while i posted extremely consistently my first few weeks i have my own projects outside the blog with original characters, so updates may not be as fast as it used to! (also some small burnout from all the twi)

--- also while ive drawn some roleplay asks before, and certainly will not stop featuring ocs in the future, i would appreciate questions to twilight rather then thinly veiled drawing requests of original characters as my requests are not open and will not be for the foreseeable future.

and thank you so much for your support lately, its truly an honor others find my blog worth their time, and support my works! like some note numbers have blown my mind!! wowza!! happy saturday! just wanted to say some thoughts, thank you again!

brohoof /) !!

Sometimes camera photos look nice 🤷

the fact that there are dudebros out there that take inclusion of different pronouns and body types in modern vidia games as attack on men and masculinity as a whole...

This is just something I need to get off my chest, so feel free to ignore it, as always ^^

As a veteran from different fandoms (and being old, especially that lol) I know people will talk and discuss and most likely dissect, well. Everything. That's probably the very nature of fandom.

Curiosity is good, most of the time it's just an innocent game of guessing that hurts virtually no one: fandom space is meant to be fandom space for a reason. That's probably the thing I like most about tumblr, there's very few celebrities on it.

Telling people not to do that it's the easiest and quickest way to spark drama and then stuff gets bigger and bigger and it's hard to ever put a lid on things.

There are certainly things that need a line drawn on; running away on serious speculations can be dangerous even if they never reach the ears of interested parties.

Trying to balance discussing stuff and venturing too much into the personal lives of those involved is always hard. I've tried to give a platform to harmless curiosity (and even a bit of gossip) with the amount of breadcrumbs I thought were enough, the ones that are already in the public, trying my best to avoid in any way encouraging (unjustified) hatred for people in their personal lives (because all it requires it's like, a single word, to get the idea into someone's head that it's okay to despise someone we don't even know simply because it happens to be involved with someone we're fans of).

This has always meant to be all in good fun. Never meant to venture into obsessive "we need to know everything", because we really don't need that to be fans. Some things are meant not to be known, sometimes it's even more fun not knowing!

Having said that, I'm disabling anon asks for a while, because I've been probably understimating the fact that there simply being an option for anon asks makes people feel allowed to be less mindful of the implications of what they're saying. I can only take the responsibility of what I choose to say and share, not how the other person feels justified in their beliefs. And that's simply too much weight for anyone and the fastest way to take all the fun and enjoyment out of fandoming.

like what is the point of me existing here if they all hate when i front lmao. they get terrified when i front and i haven't even done anything in sooooo long. literal years. I've been playing along so nicely and fucking hid myself for years so they'd let me exist in the background with the occasional fronting time and now that I've introduced myself they're all so scared of me lmao. I've been playing so nice and I've fucking done the chores. what more are they wanting from me before they stop fucking wrestling me away from front. I'm pissed off lmfao what is the issue here. theres so little i can even do in this shithole we live in anyways.

I want to talk a little bit about my inner critic...

...and hope someone can offer some advice...

My inner critic is an obnoxious, loud, and very convincing woman who never misses a chance to tell me how much I suck.

Yesterday, I was out with my kids all day, and she totally ruined my day. After my posts of the day went up, I occasionally checked Tumblr to see what was happening on those. From the comments, it soon became evident that what was clear to me in my mind, was not clear 'between the lines' in my story. So, I read back and agreed; without knowing more about what went before, information was missing. Now, I could have just taken that as a fact and move on. But that's where she comes in. And she won't let me do that. She uses this to tell me what a lousy writer I clearly am if I can't even make my main character's motivation for her actions clear.

She has been fueled by trolling anon from a few weeks ago and was now yelling at me that when my story isn't boring, it's superficial, rushed, and incomplete. And I needed to rectify this immediately if I wanted to be taken seriously again.

So, after I got home, sorted out dinner and put the kids to bed, I set out to do just that and as a result was up until 1am putting together the Sadie and Finn post I posted this morning. By the time I went to bed, I had been up for 18 hours straight (and at 6.30 am, I was awake again)

Now, don't get me wrong, I stand by that post, and in the end, I think it's a good and necessary addition to the running chapter, but the thing that drove me to write it and the sleep deprivation that came from it aren't healthy.

It also didn't shut her up. Because now she goes on about when you need to explain your character's actions, you're not writing them right.

I'm a bit of a mess... I know that... But any advice on how to shut up very harsh inner critics is very welcome.

P.s. This is not on anyone who commented on my posts. I *love* getting comments on my posts. It shows people are engaged in my story, and my characters evoke emotions. That warms my heart and helps me grow as a writer. Please never stop commenting and sharing your thoughts on my story. ❤️

When the misogyny is ✨stealthy✨ and *male author* writes women as ethereal otherworldly beings that no man can ever hope to live up to. Women are strong and beautiful and hold up everyone around them with the strength of their feminine love. Women aren’t degraded or put down by the narration so it’s okay, it’s a feminist piece, even though the end result is the same - women are forced into their box, onto their pedestal.

me, kicking my feet like a toddler: i want to finish something so i can get the instant gratification of people's validation. why does this take so much "time" and "effort" to do

The universe might be against me playing TS2, now that I otherwise could it's my third day in a row with a high fever. Especially enjoyable while the heat wave's turned my apartment into hell.

I've been using my three brain cells that haven't melted yet for slowly cleaning my downloads. I'm very grateful for all the creators who offer repo'd versions whenever possible, they really help with keeping the game playable.