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andysorbit · 11 months

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Praise & Worship Pt. 1 (M)

Churchboy!Doyoung/Camboy!Doyoung x Churchgirl!reader

Warnings: soft dom!Doie, corruption, unprotected sex (be smart), guided masturbation, overstimulation, dirty talk, big dick Doie agenda ayyyeee, slight angst, phone sex, daddy kink, fingering, squirting, spitting (I'm a spit slut leave me alone)

Word count: 4.8k

Now, this is a black church ya'll. This aint your memaw Doris' church nah sir we bumpin' them ol' negro spirituals

Thank you to @brownsugarbaybee for making me these really cool banners. Kari, your username inspired the username in this fic :,)

I also would like to thank @multifandomslxt, @calibabii21, @agust-june for being my number one churchboy!Doie enablers.

Doyoung's Playlist (because why tf not??)

The Battle is the Lord's - Yolanda Adams

I Won't Complain - Rev. Alyn E. Waller

My Redeemer - Nicole C. Mullen

Mary, Don't You Weep - Aretha Franklin

I Love the Lord - Whitney Houston

DaddyDoie's Playlist

Brown Skin - India.Arie

Untitled (How Does it Feel) - D'Angelo

Til the Cops Come Knockin' - Maxwell

TiO - Zayn

Sweetest Taboo - Sade

praise

/prāz/

verb

To express warm approval or admiration of.

worship

/ˈwərSHəp/

verb

To show reverence and adoration for.

Church is going swimmingly as it always does and you're happy to be seated in the sanctuary.

You, being an eager early bird, found your way to your seat in the front as you always do. Being the first daughter of the church is no easy feat but you love it and you love coming to give thanks to your Lord and Savior.

Adult life isn't always kind to you but you still come, rain or shine, to give honor.

Doyoung's been coming to this church since you were both eleven. His parents almost joined but they said your church was "a bit loud". That was okay. The black church experience isn't meant for everyone.

Doyoung, on the other hand, had stars in his eyes and with his parents' consent, he joined that very day; even signing up for the ministry van to come and pick him up.

Doyoung began singing in church a year after joining and he's loved it since the start. Starting off in the choir and working his way up to doing solos.

You two have grown close over the years and you've both grown up to be fine examples of how anyone can flourish when they stand in the love and dignity of the church of God.

Doyoung chose to sing The Battle is the Lord's this Sunday and as usual, he kills it.

Your father's sermon is about temperance and he preaches with his usual flair as he always does.

"Now we men know how it is when you see a beautiful woman! We know! We get a lil... 'ooooh she's a fine lookin' woman!' We get all beside ourselves sometimes! Same thing for you ladies! It's human nature, y'know. God didn't give you a single thing by accident. Ain't no sin in how you feel but it's what you do with those feelings!" he says; stopping for a minute to wipe his brow with his handkerchief.

The congregation agrees with hoots and hollers and old women fan themselves. You feel alive.

"The thing is that you can't just give yourself to everyone. Fall in love first! I tell these young kids all the time! You may think it's no big deal but it is! It's difficult to resist while you're in the thick of it but you'll be glad you stuck to the word of God and waited!"

Your eyes wander over to the the choir and you seek out Doyoung. His suit is crisp as usual and he looks amazing. His eyes meet yours and he wiggles his eyebrows.

"Like my man Doie for example! Fine ladies man, right? Of course but he's waiting for his wife. He's not paying you girls no mind because he knows the Lord is paving the pathway for his wife... hopefully my daughter- no lemme stop- but who knows? I don't! Hallelujah!"

Doyoung drops his face into his hand and laughs then looks back over at you and gives you a playful frown. You roll your eyes.

"And I know my baby likes him because everytime I mention him, she just gets that look on her face- look at her ya'll! Then those eyes get to rollin' and she just- that's my son-in-law, y’all! Hallelujah!"

"Daddy, would you stop?" You say and wave your hand at him.

Doyoung smiles at you and rolls his eyes.

When service ends, you find your dad, "You better leave me alone, old man," You say with a smile.

You father laughs and touches your face, "I don't speak on things unless I'm sure about it," he shoots back.

He's being pulled away for prayer and you greet everyone as your eyes search for Doyoung.

He finds you, as he always does, and with a warm embrace he asks you, "Did I give you chills?"

You reply, same as always, "I'm still freezing," You reply.

You pull back to look at him and he returns your smile, "You're coming back to Sister Martha's for lunch?" You ask.

"Of course I am. I'm gonna stop by and see mom and dad first but yeah. I'm coming," he says.

Mother Annie, whose mind is going, comes up to take your hand and Doyoung's, "How's my babies?" she asks.

"Oh, we're great! How are you feeling?" You say with a smile.

"I'm doing fine as always. Doie, you need a ride home, baby?" she says.

Doyoung smiles, "Oh, Mother Annie, you won't believe it but I learned how to drive! I have my own car and everything!" he says as he smiles but you see the sadness in his eyes. Everyone loves Mother Annie and it's sad to see her forgetting so much.

"Oh Jesus, I'm gettin' old," she sighs.

"But you're still a beauty," he chuckles.

She hugs him tightly then she hugs you, "He'd make a fine husband," she says as she shuffles off.

Doyoung gives you smirk, "She's not wrong," he says teasingly.

"I wouldn't know," You say sassily as you look him up and down.

Doyoung is an everybody kind of guy. Everybody loves him and everyone wants to be his wife or his in-law. He was a bit shy when he first started coming but he's grown into himself in many ways.

Your day eases by nicely and lunch is a fun gathering as it always is. Good food, good chats, and good prayers. Sister Joyce bakes a Louisiana crunch cake and as usual, threatens to spank Doyoung if he comes back for a third piece.

All is good and easy.

The week eases by and Saturday night rolls around like clockwork. You take your time preparing your clothes for church and then make a pitcher of peach iced tea that you plan on dropping off at Mother Annie's house before church in the morning.

You unwind after a nice bubble bath and dress in an oversized t-shirt and those feelings of yours bubble back up. Feelings of imagining what Doyoung's body would feel like against yours, of what it really feels like to be ravished.

Sometimes, there's a look in his eyes that you can't place and it's led you to believe that there may be a side to Doyoung that you've never seen and it gives you chills more intense than the ones he gives you in church.

On impulse, you ordered a pink dildo online a few weeks ago but your guilt is why you never even opened the packaging but tonight, your curiosity gets the best of you.

You look at it then put it back in the box.

It's a step.

You roll the idea of using it around in your head before firing up your laptop.

You started off with good intentions.

Really.

A simple Google search:

Is it a sin to masturbate?

Clicking between Christianity.com, GotQuestions.org, and reading answers and Bible verses on NeverThirsty.org for so long that you begin to wonder why the hell you should even possibly care anymore because it's all a mixture of yeses and noes.

Then comes the twist that makes you groan in defeat. The matter of lust. Can you even masturbate without lusting after someone?

You close the tabs and search for porn sites for something to watch. It's all anticlimactic. You expected more but... this is all a bit much.

A pop-up catches your eye:

DaddyDoie is live! Sign up to say hi now!

"Doie? Oh please," You scoff but you sign up and your username is BrownSugarPrincess. Is it stupid? Yes. 100% but you didn't sign up to seduce anyone or to attract any lascivious attention to yourself. You signed up because there's no way that's your Doie.

You confirm your account and you're redirected back to the livestream.

You shriek.

It is Doyoung.

Or maybe it's not. You can't see his face and the camera cuts off just at his neck and Doyoung definitely has a necklace exactly like that and those shoulders... there's no way that's Doyoung...

But it really could be...

You lean in closer to your laptop and take in his naked body with little regard to your previous research on where your soul will end up after doing a thing like this.

You slap your free hand over your mouth when he sighs, "BrownSugarPrincess. Cute name... You're my thousandth subscriber, sweetheart, so.. you've won yourself a surprise," he says softly as he strokes himself a little faster.

You'd recognize that soft, honey voice anywhere.

"Oh my God," You whisper

You watch his hand fist his cock and you're frozen; anchored in place by the sex dripping from his voice.

"I'Il send you a DM and you can tell me when you're available to claim your prize," he says slowly.

You type your reply:

BrownSugarPrincess: oh wow that's pretty cool... thank you but maybe give it to the next person? I don't think I should...

Doyoung chuckles devilishly, "Such a polite girl. It's okay, we'll talk after. I think I could change your mind."

You want to close the tab and toss your laptop across the room but you can't. His cross necklace sits so nicely around his neck and the fact that he's even still wearing it is obscenely attractive.

"God... please," You whisper. You're unsure of what you need God to do for you because more than the willpower to put your laptop away, you want Doyoung inside of you.

"I know what you want," Doyoung chuckles as his hand slows down. He's a tease.

Your hand is in your panties before you realize it and you softly touch your clit as you abandon all of your morals from earlier.

Doyoung stops stroking himself and lets his cock smack against his stomach with a heavy flop.

"Oh... oh my God," You pant as you stroke yourself a little faster.

You admire his girth and wonder for a moment how long it would take you to stretch around his cock.

He's fucking huge.

He gently runs his thumb over his throbbing tip and spreads his precum so slowly that you whine.

"Get a good look at it, baby," he sighs, "Do you think you could take all of this? How much do you think you could fit in your mouth before you start gagging on it?"

The comments are flooding in and you don't read a single one of them because how could anyone focus on typing with this indescribable being on their screen?

He chuckles as he wraps his hand around his cock once more, "You've been very quiet BrownSugarPrincess... or maybe I can just call you Princess? I bet you have the prettiest brown skin, sweetheart... I know why you're not saying anything... I know you're touching that pretty little pussy."

You buck your hips and the sound of his voice alone is enough to send you over the edge but you fight it off because you don't want this to end.

"I know you're soaking wet for daddy... In your bed with your hands between your beautiful thighs... stroking that soft, warm cunt... I know you're wishing I was there to stretch you out and fuck you like you're all mine... yeah, Princess... Daddy wants you to touch that pussy. Do that for me, baby."

Your tongue runs over your bottom lip and your fingers speed up, "Oh... fuck, fuck... fuck... fuck," You pant and you're so close and he knows it. He knows what he's doing.

He strokes himself faster and you match his pace. The moans that fall from his mouth are the most delicious sounds you've ever heard and wishing that you could feel them against your mouth, you lose the battle.

Your body trembles as you cum and soon his cum is shooting up his stomach and covering the back of his hand. His moans, slow and velvety, dance into your ears and soak your pussy even more. It's so much- too much and you could cry.

"That was so good, wasn't it?" he sighs breathlessly.

You nod and of course he can't see you but you nod anyway because he has you stuck on stupid.

"Okay... well... that's all for tonight. Thank you for coming... Princess, I'm gonna clean up and then l'll be talking to you," he says and ends the live.

You get up and clean yourself up too. The guilt kicks in as you step into the shower and you scrub your body so harshly that you think just maybe you've washed the sins off of you.

"God... please... forgive me. I'm so sorry. l'm so, so, so, sorry. God, cleanse me. Help me, Lord," You whisper over and over as you rinse the soap off of your body.

It doesn't feel like your soul is any purer but your skin is a little sore and that's a feeling that can distract you from the guilt in your chest.

You towel off once you're done and go back to your bedroom. You reluctantly check the site's notifications and you yelp.

DaddyDoie: Hello, Princess

It was sent five minutes ago.

You tap a reply; too eagerly.

BrownSugarPrincess: Hello

DaddyDoie: How are you this evening?

BrownSugarPrincess: I'm doing fine. How are you?

DaddyDoie: I'm great. Thanks for asking. How'd you find my livestream?

BrownSugarPrincess: I was kinda just looking around I guess. I tried watching porn but I didn't really find anything that was helping.

DaddyDoie: So you needed more and that's what sent you my way. That's cute. Really cute.

BrownSugarPrincess: So what's the surprise?

DaddyDoie: Well, you have two choices. A video call or a voice call.

BrownSugarPrincess: Um... maybe a voice call? I probably shouldn't though do it though.

DaddyDoie: And why is that?

BrownSugarPrincess: It's a lot to explain I think...

DaddyDoie: Maybe I should call you then. You won't have to type it all out if we just talk.

BrownSugarPrincess: Ok

Your reply sinks in and you panic but you don't have much time to wallow in it because the voice call prompt on the site pops up. You quickly grab your headphones from your nightstand and turn them on. You slip them on and answer,

You pick up, "Hi," You say softly.

"Hello, Princess," he says and there's no way this isn't Doyoung, "What's this conflict that's got you so stressed out, hm?"

"Well... I'm religious and... this is wrong. I shouldn't be doing this."

"Well... Princess, I'm probably not the best at steering people down a good path versus a bad one but... what do you want to do right now?"

"I don't know what I want."

"Oh, I don't believe that, Princess... I think you know exactly what you want but the problem is that what you want doesn't line up with what you believe is right."

You fall silent.

He chuckles, "How about this... how about you tell me what you're wearing and we can take this very slowly and if you want, you can stop me at any point,"

"O-okay... I'm... I'm wearing a towel. I just got out of the shower," You reply nervously.

"You tried to wash the sins off of that pretty body, didn't you, Princess?"

"Uh huh."

"So cute... how about you take that towel off and lay in your bed for me?"

You quickly remove your towel and toss it aside before getting into bed, "I'm uh... I'm in bed," You say shyly.

"And you're naked?"

"Y- yes."

"Say it. Tell me that you're in bed and you're naked."

You shiver, "I'm... in bed and... I'm... I'm naked."

"Good girl," he hums, "Now... I want you to touch yourself. Nice and slowly, baby, touch your pussy for me."

You hand glides down between your legs and dip past your folds, "Oh," You gasp as your fingers slowly tease your clit.

"Are you wet for me, Princess?" he asks softly. His voice shoots through your body like lightning.

"I'm so wet... so wet," You whine as your fingers move faster.

"Oh no you don't... you need to slow it down, sweetheart. You're not gonna cum until I tell you to," he says softly. You can tell he's smiling. You can always hear it in his voice.

You slow down reluctantly and whine, "Please," You beg.

"Here's what you're gonna do... I want you to take your other hand and slide two fingers inside that pretty cunt. Do that for me, baby," he tells you. His voice alone is too much and you gasp when he moans softly.

You do. Two fingers slide deep inside and you almost cum.

"I- I... oh... God... daddy," You whimper.

"That's a good girl. Just like that... fuck yourself with your fingers, baby. Fuck that tight little cunt for your daddy," he sighs.

You ease your fingers in and out of your wetness and the sounds are obscene as you fall deeper and deeper into this pit that his soft moans

"I can hear you fucking yourself, Princess. Daddy can hear you. You're so wet, baby... I hear those fingers moving inside that soaked cunt. I'd love to be there with you so I could taste you, baby, and suck on your clit until you're trembling for me... Would you let me eat that sweet little pussy? Huh, baby?"

You move faster and your body begins to tremble, "Yes... Daddy... please... please," You whine. Your voice is a desperate shrill now and colors swirl behind your eyes as you keep going.

"Chase it, baby. You can do it. It's right there for you. Isn't that right, beautiful?" he purrs.

"Uh huh... u-uh huh... daddy," You whimper.

"It's all yours, sweetheart. Come on," he says and his own voice goes a little higher. His moans shake you somewhere deep within and you wriggle desperately as your orgasm approaches.

Your eyes flutter shut and you whine as you come undone.

"Don't stop yet, baby... curl your fingers up for me," he says softly.

You immediately obey his orders and sigh, "I... I dunno if I'm doing this right."

"You'll know, sweetheart. Just take your time. If I was there with you, I'd show you exactly where to touch yourself. You wouldn't have to do a thing... just lay there and keep those pretty legs open for your daddy... I'd take good care of you... Make you feel so good I'd probably make you cry for me," he drags out as best he can and he sounds so fucking close but you know he's holding out until you find that spot he's talking about.

He was right, you do know the moment you find it because you convulse with a new rush of pleasure that overwhelms you. You press your fingers against that spot deep inside over and over, "Daddy" You mew out weakly.

"Didn't daddy tell you? That's my good girl. Keep going baby. Right there... just like that. Keep doing that," he says. His voice is deep and longing.

Your fingers speed up and you shake violently.

"Daddy!"

This orgasm is so intense that you almost forget how to breathe and you soak your hands, your thighs, and your sheets.

"That's my girl. Such a good girl, Princess. You did such a good job," he praises you breathlessly.

"I... the uh... I soaked my bed. Oh my God... I soaked my bed," You pant mindlessly and you don't even know how you're talking because it's as if you have no control over your mouth or really any other part of your body.

"Did you squirt?" he asks with a low chuckle.

"That's what it's called? I thought I pissed myself."

"No, baby. That isn't what happened at all... Was it that good?"

"Yes."

"Did I give you chills?"

Your blood runs cold, "Uh huh..." You croak.

A silence falls over the both of you for a moment.

"I um... I should go clean up," You say softly.

"I should too," he chuckles.

"Thank you," You say.

"Of course. Good night, sweetheart," he says with a soft laugh.

His voice could send you into another frenzy.

"G- good night," You say.

You end the call and slam your laptop shut, "Oh my God."

You pull off your headphones and stand up.

What a night.

Morning comes around too quickly and between your restless sleep and your general nerves about seeing Doyoung, for the first time ever, you're late for church.

Sadly, there's nowhere to hide. Your empty seat in the front row is like a stage as you quietly take your seat.

Impulsively, your eyes seek out Doyoung and there he is with his perfect posture and his teased back hair, watching you with an amused smirk. You give him a tight smile.

You don't hang on to a word your father says and save for the date scrawled sloppily at the top of your notebook, the page is blank.

Your mind replays the night before over and over. The darkness in his voice, the way he sounded as he came, the curiosity of how his cock would feel inside you; it haunts you and excites you.

You close your eyes and whisper a prayer but it's no use. Behind closed eyes, all you see is his naked body, the cross that hung lewdly against his bare chest, the cum that painted his stomach. Your eyes shoot open and Doyoung's staring at you.

"Are you okay?" he mouths.

You nod quickly and drop your head down. To look at him is to set you back from the inch of progress you've made since your last impure daydream and the knowing look in his eyes is far too much- prolonged eye contact will turn this jovial church service into your funeral.

You don't realize church is ending until your mother nudges you to stand for prayer.

As your father closes out with prayer, you look over at Doyoung who's looking right at you.

"Close your eyes," he mouths to you and you quickly obey.

When church ends your mother takes your hand, "Are you okay?" she asks.

"Yes, mama. I just didn't get enough rest last night. I'm sorry," You ramble.

"You missed my joke this morning but that's your loss," your father says as he greets you with a hug.

Like clockwork, Doyoung finds you and after warm greetings from your parents, he turns to circle his arms around you, "You must've had some night," he laughs.

"Oh uh... not really. Just had a restless sleep. Not much else," You ramble.

Doyoung is highly amused, "Oh, I'm sure, Squirtle," he laughs.

"What's that supposed to mean? What's so funny?" You ask nervously.

"Come with me, Y/n," Doyoung sighs as he leads you through the crowd. You both greet people as you go.

Mother Annie stops you both, "Hi, babies. How are you both today?" she asks as she kisses your cheek and then Doyoung's.

"We're good, Mother Annie. How are you today?" Doyoung asks.

"I'm fine, baby. Do you need a ride home?" She asks.

Doyoung's smile falters for only a second, "Well I was looking forward to seeing you so I could tell you that I have a car now!"

"Oh, you do? Now you can drive me to church!" she says with a laugh.

"Of course! You know I love you," he says sweetly.

"And I love you, baby, but you better practice that driving first. I ain't been in a car accident in a long time and I don't plan on getting into one with you," she laughs.

"Oh for sure," Doyoung chuckles.

She kisses you both again and goes on her way.

Doyoung takes you outside into the cool spring air, "Your skirt is on backwards," he says as he hooks his finger into your skirt and swiftly turns it around the right way.

"Oh... thank you," You say sheepishly.

"Look at me," he tells you softly.

You look at him and he leans in closer to you.

"Doyoung, I-"

"It's okay. You're overthinking this too much. Just let it be," he tells you softly.

"How can I? I feel awful," You say as you shake your head.

"You didn't feel bad while it was happening. In that moment, it was just us. You know I'm gonna marry you anyway so why are you so worried about it?"

Doyoung reaches out to touch your face and you lean into his hand.

"Because we're not married and... that's why it's wrong. You know that," You say, "We're not even dating."

Doyoung smiles a very smug smile, "Well, I thought we were... all those dinner dates and movie nights and staying up all night on the phone talking or just listening to each other breathe... excuse me."

"I'm sorry that was... I shouldn't have said that," You mumble.

"No, it's a good thing you did because we did sort of fall into it but we never said it and maybe that's something you needed to hear," he says.

The quiet is disrupted by the church doors opening. Everyone comes out chattering and you let the crowd separate you both.

It's a cowardly thing to do but you don't know what else to do.

When you get home, you undress and take a warm shower. The urge to wash away your thoughts is rampant and in the past twenty-four hours, if you showered every time you felt this way, you'd have no skin left and you'd never leave the shower.

You curl up on your sofa and sit in your own discomfort as you whisper prayers of forgiveness.

Doyoung lets himself in holding plates wrapped in foil and you can tell he's a little annoyed, "I figured you'd be here... Your mom said if you leave like that again, she's coming over with your dad's belt and I might tag along with my own belt but anyway... I have food and Sister Katherine made a cheesecake so come on," he says as he kicks his shoes off and makes his way to the kitchen.

You don't move from your spot on the sofa and he comes back out to hang his blazer on your coatrack by the front door.

"Come on, Y/n, get up. Let's go. If your morning went as badly as I think it did, you didn't even have breakfast so move it," he says as he loosens his tie.

Your ruthless thoughts are back and you imagine him tying your hands behind your back.

You shake your head, "You should go, Doyoung. I'm fine... I just need to be alone," You mumble.

Doyoung takes his tie off and hangs it with his blazer, "There's not a single thought you could have about me that I'd take offense to, Squirtle," he says and rolls his sleeves up.

There go the thoughts again. This time you imagine him forcing you to your knees and tracing the head of his cock across your lips.

"Doyoung, please," You sigh.

"I'm not leaving until you eat something. Besides, I've know you for... sixteen years now? Since we've known each other, we've never missed a Sunday lunch together. Just because you wanna be a butt head doesn't mean we have to break our tradition. You don't have look at me or even talk to me but you're gonna get your butt in that kitchen and you're gonna eat something," Doyoung stands over you and crosses his arms.

"Okay... fine," You say as you get up.

You both go into the kitchen and you sit down at your tiny table.

Doyoung washes his hands and removes the foil from your plate, "I got you a little bit of everything," he says and gets it going in the microwave.

You can't help but smile, "Thank you, Doie," You say softly.

He turns and smiles at you, "Y/n, you know this is no big deal, right? I mean any of this," he says as he shakes his head.

"Why did you start doing it?" You ask

Doyoung bites into a hush puppy, "I needed the money," he says casually.

"Doyoung, my dad said if you needed help to just ask," You chide.

Doyoung shakes his head, "Y/n, your dad is a great man but you don't think if I'm dipping into his wallet, it's not gonna change his idea of me? He wants me to marry you probably more than you and I want each other combined and I'd like to keep it that way. I don't plan to do this forever. It's just until I get a promotion at work and if you tell me right now that you don't want me to do this anymore, I'll find a different way to get by until then but I'm not asking your father for a dime."

The microwave beeps and Doyoung gets your plate out. He brings it over to you then puts his own plate in the microwave.

"But why? Like... I don't understand," You say quietly.

You watch him retrieve a fork from your silverware drawer and he crosses the kitchen to hand it to you, "It was the fastest and easiest solution to my problems. Between the bills and just living, it got to be too much and the student loans don't help and since I'm still paying those off, I was a bit over my head and... I know it was a bad choice to make but I was praying and nothing was happening and I crunched some numbers and the alternative was to either stop paying two bills or stop taking you out so I did what I had to do. Besides... it's twice a week for a little less than an hour and it was the only way I could still come to church and spend time with you when I want," he shoves his hands into his pockets and shrugs again.

"Doie... oh my God," You sigh, "I could've helped out or we could've gone dutch at the very least."

"Oh, God forbid. It'll be a cold day in hell before I do something like that- what kind of a man do you take me for? he scoffs.

One thing about Doyoung is that some of the old-fashioned values that the elders of the church live by have stuck with him:

Never ask a woman for money.

Never drop a woman off and drive off before she lets you know she's on the other side of her door.

Never ever let a woman you're spending time with pay for anything- even if she invited you out.

The first time you ever offered to treat him to lunch, he all but fainted.

The microwave beeps again and he takes his plate put. You watch him bring it to the table then he gets two Mason jars from a cupboard.

"I made peach iced tea last night," You say, "It was for Mother Annie but I forgot it."

Doyoung laughs as he gets the pitcher from the refrigerator, "I really ruined your morning, didn't I?"

You nod as you pile a forkful of macaroni and cheese into your mouth.

Doyoung fills your glass and then sits down to fill his own. After placing the pitcher down, he reaches across the table and holds his hands out to you.

You stare at his hands and imagine them gliding over his body then over your own, "You didn't say grace," he chides.

"Oh... sorry," You murmur and set your fork down to take his hands.

"Dear Lord, thank you for this meal and thank you for the love that went into everything. Thank you for today and give Y/n a little extra love... she needs it," he says with a smile, "In Jesus' name... amen."

"Amen," You say and smile back at him.

Clearing the air is good and although it doesn't change the longing you feel for him, it makes lunch a hell of a lot easier for you.

"It's not a crime to let me take care of you sometimes. If you need to do what you have to do for now, I won't stop you but I could help... I could send tips an-"

"Anything you send me, I'm gonna take all of it- down to the very last penny and I'm gonna donate it to the church. Do you really want money you sent me for jerking off in front of a camera funding the children's outreach program? Huh, Squirtle?"

"Well, geez, Doie. When you put it like that... ugh fine. You're impossible," You huff.

"Well then don't," he says firmly.

You both eat in silence but the air thickens as your curiosity becomes more unbearable.

"Y/n, if you have another question, just ask me. It's okay,"

"How long have you been doing this?" You immediately ask.

"Two years... eight months and fourteen days," he replies.

"Do you like doing it?"

"Not really... I'm good at it though which... excuse my language is... kinda fucked up."

"You were always this good or... did you have to work up to how good you are now?"

"I used to be nervous but... I started pretending that I was just doing it for you... like you were the only person watching and it got easier... Just so you know, I've never even thought about touching another woman. You're the first person I've ever even gone that far with," he says with a sheepish smile.

"Oh?" You say perk up.

Doyoung nods, "I uh... I watched a few people and I did some research and stuff... that's how it's gotten to this point... how I got to get you off like that... I was so scared it wasn't gonna work," he chuckles and his hand creeps across the table to brush against yours.

"You were scared?" You ask incredulously as your fingers intertwine with his.

Doyoung laughs and brings his free hand up to his chest, "I thought you were gonna hang up," he says.

"Oh no... no, no, no. That was really good,"

"Really?" he asks

You nod and he gives you a sheepish smile.

"You know... I knew it was you the minute I heard your voice," he says.

"How?" You ask.

"That voice of yours... I could hear it once and know it anywhere. All of this mileage we've accumulated and all of the times we've stayed up talking on the phone and you really thought I wouldn't know?" he laughs.

"I think... maybe..." You trail off as you push around the bits of food left on your plate.

"Maybe you wanted me to know it was you?" he asks.

You nod. It's freeing.

"I kept thinking there was something wrong with me for feeling this way... like it's just repressed for literally years and I can't stop thinking that it's wrong to feel this way," You say as you look at him. It's easier now.

"I know it's a lot to try to grapple on your own but you have to decide what's good for you... sometimes what we want isn't always what's right but you have to decide what you're gonna do," he tells you with a reassuring smile.

"Yeah... that's the problem..." You mutter.

"So what now?" he asks.

You shrug, "I'm... not sure? I was hoping you could tell me," You say and you feel yourself shrinking inside.

"I say we eat some of that cheesecake and just enjoy the rest of the day," he says as he stands up.

It would be a lie if said you weren't disappointed. You really were anticipating something more.

He knows it and it's written all over his face.

"Okay," You say softly.

"Go find a movie for us to watch, I'll clean up and get the cheesecake," he says.

"I can help you," You reply.

Doyoung stands up, "I um... I think you should just go to the living room," he retorts.

"Why?" You ask.

"Because I keep thinking about bending you over the table but I'm trying to be a gentleman and do the right thing," he replies very calmly.

Doyoung clears the plates from the table and shoos you out of the kitchen.

You settle down on the sofa and turn the television. As you mindlessly cycle through movies and shows, your ears stay trained on Doyoung busying himself in the kitchen.

"Doie, forget the cheesecake, okay? Just come on," You call out.

Doyoung comes in and sits beside you, "So what are we watching?" he asks.

"I didn't know what to pick... I uh... I figured we could agree on something?" You say quietly.

Doyoung slinks his arm around you and eases the remote out of your hand, "Okay, Squirtle, let's find something together," he hums.

"Stop calling me that," You mumble.

Doyoung turns to look at you, "What? You don't like it?" he laughs.

"No... I don't," You huff.

"You thought you pissed yourself," he laughs a little harder.

"Doyoung, stop!" You sigh.

"Okay, okay, okay... I'll stop," he chuckles and presses a kiss to your temple.

You snuggle closer to him and rest against him as he passes movie after movie.

He lands on One Direction: This is Us and he laughs when you groan.

"Remember when you were obsessed with One Direction and sister Mary said the devil got ahold of you?" he asks with a chuckle.

"Yeah... it's because I wrote a fanfiction about Zayn and my dad told her," You groan.

Doyoung gasps, "That's why?"

"Yeah... it wasn't super smutty or anything but there was kissing. I didn't go far," You sigh.

"How far did you go, devil child?"

"Kinda far but not too far I guess?"

"Hm."

You pull the remote out of Doyoung's hand, "I can show you."

"Oh... you wanna show me?" he chuckles and presses a kiss to the corner of your mouth.

You sigh and bring his hand down to nestle between your thighs, "It started off like this," You whisper.

Doyoung's fingers find their way into your panties and he touches you softly as he holds your gaze, "Well that's a very good start," he says and leans in to kiss you slowly.

His fingers stroke you slowly and you want to believe that he couldn't possibly feel this good and have no experience but anything is possible at this point.

You moan into his mouth and he chuckles as he strokes his tongue against yours.

Your stomach flutters and you heat up as his fingers speed up and slow down.

"Doie... Doie, please... please, Doie," You whimper.

"Hm?" he hums as he slips two fingers into you, "Is this what you want?"

You writhe as he fucks his fingers into you, "Please, Doie."

Doyoung laughs and curls his fingers up to touch you just how he told you to the night before, "Oh, Y/n... Y/n, Y/n, Y/n... I'm trying so hard... to be a gentleman and you just won't let me," he purrs against your ear.

"I just want you... I need you. Please," You sob desperately as he pulls his fingers out of you and slides them into his mouth with a soft moan.

He is so obscene and drives you to the brink of desperate tears.

"You need me? For what, Squirtle? Huh?"

"I- I... please... please fuck me."

"I thought you wanted me to wife you first... what happened to that? Hm? Isn't this wrong?" he says as his fingers find their way back to your clit.

He slows his fingers down and you sigh in frustration.

"I don't care.. I don't care. I don't... I don't, I don't, I don't... just want you inside me," You beg and bring your hand down to cover his, "Please... I need it so bad."

Doyoung sucks a mark into your chest, "Don't start something that you can't finish," He hisses. His fingers speed up again.

"I want you, Doie, please," You whine.

Doyoung shifts and pushes you into a leaning position over the armrest. His hands squeeze your ass and you close your eyes in anticipation.

"You should see how good you look from here," he hums and pulls your panties down. His fingers slide over the curve of your ass to stroke your clit as you push back against his hand.

"Do you wanna know something else?" he whispers against your ear.

"Yes... uh huh,"

"I knew it was you when you joined my stream."

"H-how?"

His fingers slow down, "That's the same username you used when we snuck and made those Snapchat accounts when we were younger... remember?"

The memory ebbs back into your mind and you smile for a moment.

"You've always been my predictable girl... do you remember why you liked that username so much?"

You nod and squeeze your eyes shut as he slides his fingers inside to fuck you slowly.

"Tell me," he whispers.

"You- said I looked like brown sugar."

It was a joke you two had started. Your 'that's you' game. Finding things you thought were beautiful and yelling out "that's you!". It was an innocent game for years until it was forgotten. Doyoung, when you both were sixteen, had revived it in your kitchen while helping your mother bake Sister Janie a pecan pie when she was pregnant.

He whispered it as your mother was measuring brown sugar but this time it was different, as if he was confessing his true feelings for you and that was the day you knew you loved him.

Doyoung kisses your neck, "That's right... my beautiful girl... with the prettiest skin and the sweetest lips... I knew all along."

You wriggle and whine as his fingers continue their attack on you, "Please, Doyoung," You groan.

Doyoung pulls his fingers from your wetness and sucks them clean before opening his pants.

You turn to look at him and he pulls you up to turn and face him, "I wanna see your pretty face while I'm filling you up," he whispers as he eases you back against the space between the armrest and the back of the sofa.

You spread your legs so willingly that you're a little embarrassed.

Doyoung notices and smiles as leans down to kiss you, "That's my good girl. Don't be embarrassed... I want you just as badly," he says as he eases you out of your shirt.

Somehow, there's comfort in lying naked here in front of him and you know Doyoung feels it too.

"I love you, Y/n," he says sincerely; a look of timidity comes through and you touch his face.

"I love you too," You whisper.

A chill passes wildly through your body as you watch him unbutton his shirt. He shrugs it off and your eyes fall down to the cross on his neck. The guilt doesn't bubble up this time.

Doyoung looks down at you and you can see the reluctance in his eyes, "I wanna try something with you and I kinda wanna see your blind reaction to it because I really think you're gonna like it but I need you to trust me," he says softly.

You nod eagerly, "I trust you," You whisper.

He smiles and leans down, "Okay... open your mouth," he says softly and takes your chin between his fingers.

You part your lips and he spits in your mouth. Your breath catches in your throat as the sensation of feeling his saliva in your mouth raises goosebumps on your skin. You swallow with a soft hum.

"Oh... wow," You breathe.

"Right?" he chuckles and touches your face.

You nod in agreement as you wrap your arms around his shoulders to pull him down even closer. His necklace swings and taps your chin. It excites you in a way.

"Thank you for trusting me," he whispers.

You kiss his eyes, "Always."

You feel the head of his cock nudge your clit and you squeak.

"Keep your eyes on me, okay? I really wanna see your face while I'm fucking you,"

You nod and look at him.

"God, you're so beautiful," he sighs.

Slowly, he eases into you and you keep your eyes on him, just like he asked.

"I can already feel myself becoming addicted to you... I wanna stay like this with you forever and ever. You... fuck... you feel so good," he whines as he bottoms out completely.

"Doie, please," You choke out.

Doyoung pulls out almost completely before easing back into you.

"Do you like this?" he asks.

You can tell he's holding back.

You nod, stupid and enthralled by his voice and his touch, and the pressure you feel as he fills you up.

The softness of this moment is too much because how did you just fall deeper in love with him?

"P-please...go harder," You whimper as you clench around him hungrily.

Doyoung hisses and drops his head down to touch yours, "If you keep doing that, I'm gonna cum.... You want that? Wanna feel my cum inside you?"

"Yeah... I want it," You moan.

"You're so cute," Doyoung chuckles, "Say it. Say what it is that you want." He thrusts a little faster and you spread your legs in wanting.

"I want... you to... fill me with your cum," You pant.

"That's my dirty girl," he coos, "You're not on birth control, are you?"

You shake your head, "No... no," You reply.

He hums as he fucks into you, "Oh... so you really want me," he laughs.

You nod and lift your head to kiss him, "I... want all of you."

Doyoung slams into you once and stops to lock eyes with you, " Like that?" he asks and does it again.

You nod and whine.

He fucks you with a hard and steady rhythm and the sounds of his hips meeting yours take you somewhere obscene as you writhe against him and take each thrust with an unsurmountable greed for the next.

"I love you," You whisper; voice trembling as you lose yourself in his eyes.

"And I love you," he whispers back.

He picks up speed with a soft moan and kisses you. You lick into each other's mouth sloppily and he takes that as as sign and proves that he knows you well enough, "Open your mouth, sweetheart," he pants.

Your mouth falls open greedily and he spits in your mouth again. This time you hold it in your mouth and moan with satisfaction.

"I need more, Doie... please," You plead.

He snakes a hand down between your bodies and toys at your clit, both of your whimpers fill the thick air of your living room.

"I'm... oh, Doie," You whine, "I'm close."

"Cum for me, sweetheart. It's alright," he whispers against your mouth.

You release with a cry and Doyoung pulls out. You gasp, "No, no, no... Doie, please... please," You beg desperately.

"I'm not done, babe... turn around for me. I'm not done with you yet," he chuckles as he shifts you to turn and lean back over the armrest.

"Doie," You groan as he eases himself back into you and you welcome back that delicious stretch, "Fuck... you're so big."

Doyoung brings a hand around to stroke your clit again and you inch away from him as he fucks you. His hips smack against your ass and you whine.

"You love it, baby... You love how I stretch you out. How good it feels... I love it too... Love the way you grip me just right," he purrs.

His free hand comes up to softly circle around your throat and he pulls you up to press your back to his chest.

"Give it to me, baby... come on... You can do it again," he whispers as his fingers increase in speed. You wriggle against him and he laughs as you try to ease away from him to escape his ministrations.

"Hey, hey... where are you going, huh? Don't run from me," he laughs softly as you let him fuck into you, "That's right... stay right here with me... you love this, right?"

You nod furiously, "U-uh... h-h-huh! Yes, daddy!" you squeak.

He leans down to press his lips against your neck before licking his way up to the shell of your ear, "Yeah you do, baby... yeah, you do," he coos against your heated skin, "That's why you have to stop running from me... if you really need me to stop, you know what to say... so why don't you stay still, huh? Let me play with you."

"I love you, Doie," You gasp.

"You love me, sweetheart?" he moans.

You nod in agreement, "S-s... so... much," You sob.

His fingers stroke you faster, "Again... give it to me. Right now, baby... give it to me."

Your body is a storm of wanting him to stop but dying to feel him take you to your own heaven once more. Your body tightens up, "Doie..." You choke out.

He hisses at the sound of your soaked pussy clenching around his cock, "Sounds just like it did last night... such a good pussy... so tight and hot... it's all mine, right?"

You nod and your body convulses as you cum once more. You try to squeeze your thighs shut but Doyoung holds his hand firmly against your cunt, "You're so beautiful... just a perfect... perfect angel," he sighs as he emphasizes each word with a sharp snap of his hips.

"Please!" You cry as you try in vain to push his hand away. Despite your attempts, you don't really want him to stop. If he told you that you were to stay with him forever, just as you are right now, you wouldn't think twice about it.

"I love you, baby," he whispers as he cums. His body shudders and he kisses your neck again.

You both fall forward against the armrest and Doyoung stills himself.

You both tremble as you come down and Doyoung chuckles weakly, "I don't wanna pull out yet. Can I stay like this with you for a little bit longer?" he asks. He's still hard and if you weren't so spent, you'd do something about it.

"You're still hard," You whisper.

"It's okay, sweetheart... We have the rest of the day and I'm not going anywhere," he replies

Doyoung rouses you from your slumber gently, "I have to get home, Y/n. I have work in the morning," he whispers.

You roll over and drape your arm and leg around him, "Don't leave me," You mumble.

"Well unless you're down with three livestreams this week, I gotta go. I'll see you later. I'll come by after work," he says and kisses the side of your face.

"No... no. I'll come by your place. It's my day off. I'll make you dinner," You say as you sit up and kiss him.

"Not you being an obedient wife. Gonna make dinner and wait for me?" he chuckles.

"Yeah... what do you want me to make?"

"Whatever you want. You know I love eating anything you make," he whispers against your mouth. You know he's trying his hardest to not give in and stay with you.

"Pan fried steak with mushrooms?"

"Oooh."

"Mashed potatoes?"

"Stop, you're turning me on."

"Steamed broccoli and carrots?"

Doyoung turns onto his side then pushes you on your back and his fingers find their way between your legs.

"My parting gift to you," he says softly as his fingers draw soft circles into your clit. You spread your legs a little wider and close your eyes.

"Doie... thank you," You whimper.

Doyoung talks you through your orgasm, "Cum for me... that's my good girl. Always so wet and warm... cum, baby. You can do it," he hums.

"Doie... yes," You whine groggily.

His fingers work you faster and you gasp as you cum.

"That's my sweetheart... Good girl," he coos.

The last thing you feel before you drift back to sleep is his lips pressing softly against your forhead.

So we're slaves to any semblance of touch. Lord, we should quit but we love it too much. - Andrew Hozier-Byrne

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