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levitiquee · 6 months

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𝘔𝘦𝘢𝘨𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘶𝘴 𝘴𝘰 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭

𝘞𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘳𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘴, 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘵e𝘭𝘭

Levi let out a sigh of relief the moment your silhouette appeared through the shadows, tensed shoulders relaxing. He turned his head, all focus shifting instantly to you.

“You.” He exhaled, a hint of exasperation in his tone, indicating that the little time spent without your absence had not been very fun. “Where have you been?”

“Hi. Went to scout.” You answered, reaching the little campfire to stand beside Levi. All your friends sat circling it. Levi’s subtle, not very subtle eagerness at your arrival seemed to have triggered something, making the already guffawing crowd of people laugh even harder. Concluded with Levi’s sour face, it wasn’t very hard to guess what the subject of amusement must have been.

“Oh, are we bullying Levi again?” You beamed, nudging Levi’s leg with your foot, signaling him to give you space. “Scoot over. I want to join too.”

Levi shot a glare, but shifted to let you sit beside him. As another wave of laugher sparked through your friends, you plopped down on the grass, folding your legs. It was a chilly night, and everyone wanted to stay near the fire, therefore, the circle was so tightly formed around the fire, you could barely squeeze yourself between Levi and Nifa.

“Sit on my lap, why don’t you?” Levi grumbled, scowling and squirming a little at the close contact.

“What? It’s cold. And you’re warm.” You said as you sat down. “What are you so pissy for anyways?” You pressed yourself tighter, curling yourself up against him, uncaring of the poisonous gaze. You’ve learnt a long ago, half of Levi's words didn’t mean shit, that if he actually was uncomfortable, you wouldn’t even be here right now, he would’ve broken a bone or two. Levi’s personal space wasn’t something he let anyone come through, but you’ve been an exception for that for a long time.

And he was warm. A warmth that surprisingly only the cold, cold man was capable of.

And as always, the low protest died soon and he adjusted to let you lean against him.

“Hange.” He muttered, answering your previous question. “They’re trying to convince people to marry me.”

“Wonderful.” You grinned, “I volunteer.”

“I hate you.”

Cue for a very drunk Hange cracking up again, leading the others to join in. Even Erwin, ever regal and solemn, couldn’t seem to be able to hold the small smile from forming. With Hange’s contagious laughter and Levi’s scowl, it was impossible to.

“Oh why’d you let Hange drink again?” You laughed, watching them as Moblit struggled, trying to pry the bottle out of the section commander's grasp. “They're gonna be terrible to deal with tomorrow.”

“They insisted it was one sip.” Erwin said solemnly.

“Well, that sure seems like one sip.”

“But seriously though,” Nanaba piped in, shoulders still shaking with the waves of laughter. “Levi’s got all that spunk, but no bitches.”

“Stubborn shortie-” Hange's voice was cut of as they hiccupped

“Shut up. All of you. Please.” Levi sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “

“Point stands. In your mid-thirties, Levi. How long are you going to wait?”

“Why,” He huffed. “Are you people so insistent on analyzing my personal life every damn time? Do you not have anything better to do?”

“Only well wishers.” She gave him a smug smile. “That’s what friends do, they care for each other.”

“No. You just want to give me shit.”

“Well, that too.” She shrugged.

“Iffff—if anything,” Hange stumbled in, rubbing their eyes. She glanced at you pointedly. “You could at least date her. That’d be nice.”

“So I keep telling him.” You feigned a disappointed sigh.

“Don’t fucking egg them on.” He hissed, face heating up at the suggestion. How could they even think it’d work out? He thinks, against the thoughts tugging. Ridiculous. They were ridiculous. You were just as ridiculous. So what does he do with this ridiculous fucking feelin–

“Oh but look,” Hange leaned forward, squinting to watch the two of you, their glasses reflecting off the fire and casting shadows on their face. “ Do mine eyes deceive me or is Ackerman over there blushing?”

“No.” The denial was quick. A little too quick.

“I confirm.” Nanaba smirked. Miche grunted.

“No.”

“Oh, Levi.” Erwin’s eyes glimmered amusement.

“I will hit you. Don’t even go there.”

The roar of laughter only grew louder.

And the night rolled on, the nonsense bickerings and banters continued. Friendly faces and friendly voices, joking and teasing and laughing without a care in the world. Bottles clinked, the firelight glinting on them. At one point, you and Hange started singing some stupid song you’ve heard in the fair, rocking back and forth with the music. And you weren’t certain, but you could swear there was a hint of melody even in the wind blowing by. And it was cold, but with Levi beside you, you were okay. But that was okay, it was okay. More than okay, really. The happiness was overwhelming.

“You know,” Hange called out suddenly. They had taken to fully sprawl out on the grass. They’d been quiet a while, and you had thought they must’ve passed out, but appears not.

Everyone turned to look at them.

“This is nice isn’t it?” They mumbled, blinking up to the sky. “I mean, sure, we might die tomorrow, but this is nice. I wouldn’t really mind dying.”

“You know, what would’ve been nice, Hange?” Nanaba said, watching Hange. And despite the words itself, she was smiling. “To not mention death.”

“I know but,” Hange sat up, grinning. “This is not too bad as a last night of your life right? I wouldn’t mind.”

And for a second, no one spoke. Perhaps, it was because all were drunk more or less but that hit harder in that moment. Unsaid words were spoken in silence, the wind carrying the oaths away. And even Levi’s eyes had softened.

Only Hange could say words like that with that face, you thought. You weren’t sad, not really. Because Hange was right. Being a scout meant learning to appreciate every breath you can take, and nights like this were as good as they’d come.

“Aww Hange.” You sighed, grinning back. “Cheesy much? You’re making Levi all squirmy.”

“No, I am not—” Levi’s protests were buried as the group jumped in yet again another session of Levi leg-pulling.

But despite it all, Levi thought.

Pissheads, all of them were. But nevertheless.

He watched you with the corner of his eyes, watching you as you laughed your head off to something Eld said, shoulders shaking, the firelight making your eyes glitter. And you were so close, so close, he could hardly breathe. And the urge to wrap an arm around you, to pull you closer. To feel you against him.Would that be so wrong of him? If he leaned close, would you pull away? But it’s okay, he thinks.

Hange was right.

It’s okay if he dies tomorrow. He wouldn’t really mind.

He didn’t really mind right now either.

He finds it strange that he didn’t really mind it. Any of it.

He didn’t mind Hange or Nanaba or any of them.

He didn’t mind your stupid little jokes, clearly made with the intention to piss him off. He didn’t really mind that you were so close. He didn’t mind that your head on his shoulder. He didn’t mind a lot of things that he thinks he would’ve minded if it was anyone else but you.

He doesn’t really know how it works. He doesn’t like thinking about the strange little feelings in his heart that tugged everytime you smiled, or the way his stomach tightened whenever you flirted with him so casually.

And maybe one day he’ll tell you. Maybe he won’t

Does it matter? Is it not enough to only have you alive and close?

He’s here now. With everyone and with you.

He’s home.

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giaourtopita · 3 years

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Hello! I’m a sucker for that sweet angst and I’m sorry in advance!😭So can I request the brothers with an Mc who has a few months to live because of an illness they were born with? How do they send their time with Mc? How do they react when Mc dies?

mc dies due to a congenital disease

first of all, thank you for requesting!! i didn't really expect a request tbh. and i really hope i did this justice, i even started listening to a sad playlist to get even more in the mood to write this!! i hope you'll like it <333

warnings; gn mc, angst, death, unhealthy habits, sad just so sad, slight medical talk, alcohol used as a coping mechanism but not to an unhealthy amount, lesson 35-36 spoilers in asmo's and beel's part, lesson 16 spoilers in belphie's part.

(first of all i would like to say that none of them would react well but all of them would try to spend as much time as possible with mc)

lucifer

- would not believe them at first, he would think this is just belphie and satan playing a sick joke on him.

- believes it only after seeing the mc talking to doctors and trying to find a course of treatment.

- throws himself into work, trying to convince himself the situation will resolve itself.

- once he comes to term with it, he would try to spend as much time as possible with them

- he would take them to as many new places he can, and try to give them many new experiences before it happens.

- would even ask barbatos if he can go back in time to find them a cure.

- when the inevitable happens he thinks his father is the one to blame, it's his fault for everything. them falling, lilith dying and now this. "why can't he just leave us alone?".

- throws himself into work again but only this time he's working so hard his brothers and friends had to talk some sense to him.

- diavolo gives him some time to pull himself together, and because he has so much time on his hands, he locks himself in the comfort of his room and drinks to feel just so he can stop feeling for a little while.

- only gets better when he sees mammon trying to take care of him and be responsible with money and around the house.

mammon

- "mc you're joking right? you're my human, you can't die! ya hear me?"

- he would be attached at the mc's hips. even starts staying in their room to watch them.

- acts like he's fine when they're around but when he's alone he gets overwhelmed, he can't imagine how his life will be after mc is gone.

- also gets mad at his father "why do you hate us so much?" *he yells at the sky while sobbing*

-he's so frustrated with this situation because who will be nice to him when mc is gone?

- will try to get the witches to help him but it's a lost cause, there's no cure magical or not.

- when it happens, he blames himself. he blames himself because he failed to help them, even tho they always helped him.

- his scheming will get insufferable, he will try to get as much grimm as he can so he can buy things that remind him of the mc.

- he hoards all those things he buys all around the house actually. and if anyone anyone tries to throw those things away he gets agitated and turns into his demon form to fight them.

- will get better once he sees levi trying to pick all the things mammon left in his room.

leviathan

- "what? why? no, you can't die! stupid normie, you can't just leave me all alone like that" ... "we need more time!"

- he feels useless because there's nothing he can do, "the lord of shadows would have find a way to help his henry".

- hates it when his brothers take away the mc from him and starts throwing tantrums when they're not around, the rest of the brothers can't imagine how it will be in the future.

- tries to go outside more with them so he has memories with them that don't include sitting in his room and watching anime, those times he went outside he actually appreciated being there.

- also makes them stay in his room, they sleep in his arms and he starts sleeping in his demon form, wrapping his tail around the mc so they can't go anywhere, he knows this is pointless.

- still tries to watch as much anime as possible but when a character he likes dies, he finds himself sobbing like a baby not because he's sad for the character but because he knows this will happen to his henry.

- when they pass away he feels numb, he did all the crying when they were still there with him, he becomes an even bigger shut-in doesn't want to meet any new people especially not humans, not because he hates them but because they remind him of the mc.

- the only reason he leaves his room is to go swimming, he does that even more than he used to. his younger brothers were worried but lucifer thinks this is a healthier alternative to anything else he could do.

- is so angry at his father that he threatens war to the celestial realm using the devildom's navy.

- only got better when lucifer tried to reason him, he knows the mc wouldn't want him to do that but he doesn't know what else to do or how to mourn the human.

satan

- does not believe them, they look healthy to him so what are they talking about?? only believes them when they start talking about symptoms or he sees the symptoms himself.

- starts looking for a magical remedy to make them feel better, or even a cure. but it's no use, he can't find anything helpful other than pain relief magic. he even asks solomon but he wasn't able to give him something useful to work with.

- reads to them books about characters who feel how he feels because he can't bring himself to actually tell them how awful he is feeling.

- tries to spend as much time as possible with them even if it's for the silliest, most insignificant things there are.

- is barely able to keep himself together, he gets agitated by the smallest things you can imagine.

- after their death he feels as if a big part of his identity vanished, he feels how he used to feel about himself before he made up with lucifer and he hates that.

- going to a cat cafe or a library don't cheer him up as much as they used to, he just wishes to be with them and nothing else.

- is angry at himself and at god. he's angry at himself because even tho he knows so many things he wasn't able to save them and he's angry at god because everything is his fault.

- asmo suggests he writes a book about them and their shared memories, since he loved them and he loves books satan finds this idea excellent, however it doesn't help much because whenever he starts writing he gets so into it that he neglects himself.

- is able to kinda pull himself together when he sees lucifer bringing him a cat for emotional support, they both know this is not a permanent solution but it will help him cope for now.

asmodeus

minor lesson 35 spoiler!!

- "what?? no no no!! this isn't happening mc!! we will find a solution i promise!"

- asks solomon and his fans to help but there's nothing they can do to help.

- buys them as many pretty outfits he can and takes photos of them to remember.

- is actually the first one to accept what is going to happen, after all he's used to losing the people that he loves, some leave due to jealousy and others die.

- does even more sleepovers in his room with the mc so they can have lots of fun together, even if this situation is very sad he tries to be positive and make the best memories he can with them

- though he still looks cheerful, he's so sad internally he doesn't know what to do after his mc is gone. he feels as if he won't be the same without them because he's one of the very few people who didn't care about his looks and loved him for him, he will miss this feeling so much that he's trying cling onto it as much as time allows him to.

- after it happens, he is also numb. not because he grieved before they died but because he tries to shut down his feelings by indulging in his sin, going clubbing and spoiling himself even more than before.

- though none if the above are as fun now that he can't do them with them, he gets to the point where he stops listening to lucifer and starts talking to everyone in a sarcastic tone.

- clings to solomon because even though he knows that solomon can't die, he can't help but feel like he needs to. solomon was able to talk some sense to him after lucifer told him about his behaviour. gets better when his brothers start aggressively pointing out his awful behaviour and how much they care about him and his well-being.

beelzebub

lesson 36 spoiler!!

- "NO! this can't be happening again! you stole lilith from us and now you're doing it again with mc!" *is sobbing while yelling*

- will also camp in their room to watch them and spend time with them.

- will take them to every single one of his games, and will try to take as many pictures as possible.

- takes them to every restaurant he knows of and makes them do taste testing, he notes everything they like in a cookbook, filled with every food the mc likes, and makes it for them when they're hungry.

- sad that there's nothing he can do to help and even sadder that mc was always able to help him when he needed to.

- feels guilty about this situation because mc had to use their life essence, their already limited amount of time, to save his life.

- he cuddles them to sleep, but most of the time it's not because they need it. he actually does it because he needs it and mc knows this.

- when mc passes away he goes out of control, always going on a rampage when someone from his team mentions how he's a free demon without a pact now, he misses mc so much.

- he is constantly in a bad mood and sometimes he's so sad that he forgets to eat even if he's starving.

- only starts to pull himself together when belphie tries to take care of him by cooking and forcing him to eat when he doesn't at least try to eat the most important meals of the day.

belphegor

lesson 16 spoiler!!

- "did lucifer made you say this? i know our last prank was a bit over the top but this is inappropriate" mc explains to him while showing him their test results.

- drags them to attic and cuddles them while yelling and sobbing, not wanting to believe it.

- he would stay awake more than his normal self so they can spend more time together, even if it's just cuddling or talking.

- he tries to find a spell to at least make them live a little longer, but it's hopeless there's nothing he can do.

- also feels guilty, not only does mc get to experience their death for the second time but so do his brothers.

- clings onto them as much as he can.

- when they die it's like he falls into a coma, when people try to wake him up he doesn't even flinch it's like he wants to be in a coma.

- has made it so that he gets such vivid dreams that he can visit mc in them and that's the reason he won't wake up.

- wakes up when he hears beel cry about him, mc and lilith. tries to get over it for beel.

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me asmo #obey me beel #obey me belphie #obey me leviathan #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me satan #obey me x mc #obey me x reader #obey me headcanons #obey me angst #i broke my heart so many times trying to write this

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thisgirlsays22 · 6 years

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Intro to Data Science: Chapter 4

Fic Rating: E / Chapter Rating: Also E

Fandom: Shingeki no Kyojin

Pairing(s): Eren Yeager/ Levi

Chapter Word Count: 5.3K

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Fluff and Smut, (British) Professor Levi, (American) Student Eren, Long Distance

Summary:

“You’re probably just into him for the accent.”

“It’s not that,” Eren argued. “It doesn’t hurt, but it’s so much more than that.”

Mikasa rolled her eyes. “Sure.”

Notes:

For my lovely @fluffymusketeer <3 Danni, I hope your eyes are well-rested and ready for more romance and smut.

And a big thank you to @attraversiamo19 for continuing to be an incredible beta, and to @erensjaegerbombs for coming on board as a beta/smut consultant. You guys are the best! (And to @dreamxxdream for continuing to read and give encouragement on early drafts <3333.)

Read chapter 4 on Ao3 or under the cut. Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | chapter 3 on Tumblr.

What the hell were you supposed to bring to someone’s place if they’d invited you over for tea? The thought had plagued Eren all week.

Historia, the girlfriend of one of his roommates--Ymir, the mean one from Wales--and, somewhat embarrassingly, Eren’s only friend, had suggested he have some fun and buy an assortment of tea for Levi.

“It’ll be cute,” she'd assured him. “Ymir secretly loves that sort of thing. I think she finds it disarming.”

They’d even gone to Tesco together, and he’d come away with far more than he’d planned. Or at least far more than felt appropriate to bring as a thanks for inviting me to tea, can we please fuck again, and can you say filthy things to me in that accent, thank you again for the hospitality.

Now, outside Levi’s flat, Eren stared down at the bag full of tea and realised what a dumb gift this truly was. He ran a nervous hand through his hair and worked up the nerve to buzz Levi’s apartment.

Laughter and music from the high street bars and restaurants were drowned out by Eren’s thoughts, playing on loop as he waited for Levi to let him in: Holy shit I have Levi’s address. Holy shit I am at Levi’s apartment. Holy shit I’m going to see Levi. Holy shit I’m going to fuck Levi again.

That is, if Levi wanted to fuck him after he saw his stupid bag of tea.

The door swung open. “Hi,” Levi said, cheeks flushed. “It’s a bit hot in here. I’ve got the oven on.” He patted his hands on his apron, which read Keep Calm and Set a Bloody Timer.

He’s got the oven on, Eren thought, dazed. He fucking cooked for me. “Hi,” Eren said. “Cool apron. Very British.”

Levi rolled his eyes. “A gift from a friend. Come in.”

“I, um. Here--” Eren thrust the bag at Levi, embarrassed that for some reason Levi seemed to be cooking him dinner and he’d brought...a bag of tea. He was going to have to have a talk with Historia about this.

Levi gave the bag a puzzled frown as he took it from Eren. After having a quick look through, Levi’s eyes softened and he said, “Eren, these are all awful.”

Eren burst out laughing, feeling the tension ease. It was so much better that Levi didn’t pretend to make a fuss. “Oh. Really? I thought Twinings was nice.”

Levi chuckled and shook his head. “Why did you even bring these?”

“You invited me for tea? My friend thought it would be a nice idea. In place of wine.” He rubbed the back of his neck, still embarrassed.

Levi bit his lip, trying not to laugh.

“What?”

“Tea’s not...I’ve invited you round for dinner.”

“No. No. You distinctly said tea.” He pulled out his phone and scrolled up. “Here, look. I said ‘what time should I come over for tea’, and you didn’t correct me.”

To Eren’s dismay, Levi didn’t bother to look at the textual evidence. Instead, he said, “It’s another word for dinner.”

“Fuck. Really?” Eren laughed, hoping Levi didn’t think he was a complete idiot.

“I did ask if you had any allergies or dietary restrictions. Don’t you have any British friends?” At least Levi sounded amused and was courteously trying to hold back his laughter.

“I thought you were just being kind of weird. And not really. My best friend here is also American.” And gives really bad gift advice. “I mean my flatmates are from here, but we don’t talk much. We’ve definitely never had dinner together.” Reiner drank a lot of protein shakes, and Eren had never seen Bert eat anything but pasta and peas. Annie and Ymir remained mysteries that Eren was fine not solving.

“Well, that explains it then.” Levi was still holding the bag, giving it an odd little smile.

“Do you want to keep them?” Eren asked.

“No. Please take them far away from here. Donate them to charity or give them to your flatmates.” He placed the bag down in the hallway, but he did it gently, and Eren felt that somehow the gift had still been well received. Even if it was not being kept.

Eren took off his shoes and left them on the rack next to a few pairs of Levi’s. On the other side of the hall was a closed door, and he realised it must be Levi’s bedroom. He got one of those full body heat waves that he thought he’d left behind during his teen years. Why did he have no chill over Levi’s fucking bedroom and the fact that he might end up in there later?

Levi ushered him into the main part of the apartment.

“Your place looks like one of the Ikea magazines my mom keeps in her bathroom.”

“Thank you?” Levi said, raising an eyebrow.

“It’s really nice!” Eren clarified.

“Ah, right.” Levi looked pleased. “Make yourself comfortable,” he said, gesturing towards the living room.

Eren had meant what he’d said, but underneath the compliment lurked a sadder observation. The apartment was gorgeous; the kitchen and living room were connected, and above the leather sofa, a wide skylight opened up to grey clouds and the fading light straining through them.

Gorgeous, but bare, missing the feeling of being home. Two book shelves flanked the television--Eren spotted Levi’s copy of The Book of Dust and felt a flush of warmth in his chest--but otherwise the place seemed cold and unlived in, like it really was just a model home made for photographs in magazines.

But of course he wasn’t going to mention that now. He didn’t want to exacerbate the awkward, tentative tension between them.

“So if tea is dinner, what are we having?” Eren asked.

“Wine,” Levi deadpanned. “Lots of wine.”

Eren laughed at Levi’s response, but a shyness crept up on him, the intimate feel of the night had thrown him off-balance. Like standing on an unsteady boat at sea.

“Can I help with anything?” he asked as he watched Levi bustling around the kitchen. It didn’t look like he was doing anything in particular, but he certainly appeared busy.

“No no. Thanks. Have a seat.”

Maybe Eren should just go kiss him or something. But hadn’t Levi invited him here to talk? Apparently tea wasn’t even really tea, so he had no fucking clue what was going to happen.

Eren took a seat at the table so he would still be close enough to hear Levi or offer help again.

“So really what’s for dinner?”

Levi, who still appeared to be doing nothing in the kitchen while looking intently focussed, smiled at the question.

“Salmon and roasted veg.”

“That sounds great!”

Silence again and more of Levi’s fussing around in the kitchen. Was Levi as nervous as Eren?

Unable to bear the tension anymore, Eren stood and walked over to Levi. He blurted out the question that had been on his mind since he left Levi’s office: “Are we going to talk about...whatever is going on here?”

“Yes.”

They stared at one another, and Levi didn’t offer any further explanation.

“I want to keep seeing you,” Eren said, exasperated.

Levi sighed. “I’d like that too.”

Eren startled. “Really? But you said you didn’t see this going anywhere.”

“Still asked you here, didn’t I?”

“Yeah, but what if I want to see where this goes? I want to, you know, date you or whatever.” Eren tried to keep his tone casual. He didn’t know where this could go either, really. He didn’t know if Levi would like him once he really got to know him, didn’t even know if he’d be staying in the country once he’d turned his thesis in. But still. He couldn't help that he wanted to find out where it could go.

Levi crossed his arms and leaned back against the counter. “I’d like to keep seeing you. May as well see what happens.”

Eren took a moment to let that sink in. It suddenly felt as though he was having a lucid dream, nothing around him real and anything was possible.

“I read the university’s policy. On students and teachers,” Eren said.

Levi sighed. “I did too. Eren look I--I need to talk to my department head.”

Eren blinked at him. “Oh.”

“You’re not okay with that?”

“No, no. It’s that I’m surprised you want to bring it up now. It feels so serious and official,” he explained.

“Even if this doesn’t go beyond tonight, I shouldn’t be on any panels to grade your work. If I am, it should be approved by the department.”

The thought of other professors knowing there was something going on between them made Eren uneasy. He didn't want Levi to be judged.

“If it makes you too uncomfortable, I won’t, but I don’t think--I don’t think anything more should happen between us if that’s the case.”

He was stunned by Levi's willingness to put himself in such an awkward position. “Okay,” Eren agreed. “What are you going to tell them?”

“That you blew me in my office, and I jerked you off.”

Eren kept his face serious, not wanting Levi to get the best of him. “That’s great. I just wanted to make sure you’d provide an accurate account of what happened. Spare no detail.”

Levi snorted. “Yes, I’ll be sure to mention the cum you wiped on my face.”

“They don’t need to hear about that.”

“Spare no detail,” Levi reminded him.

Eren swallowed, ready to seize the opportunity he saw. “You should also make sure to tell them that I don’t think I’ve ever come so hard in my life. Your voice does things to me.”

Without any more jokes to hide behind, Eren leaned awkwardly against the counter next to Levi.

Levi turned away, tips of his ears red. “Yes, well. I’ll be sure to include that in my report.” He cleared his throat. “There’s a corkscrew in the drawer to your left if you want to get started,” he mumbled, putting on his oven mitts and pulling out the tray, full of a colourful assortment of fish, tomatoes, asparagus and carrots.

“That looks amazing,” Eren said as he searched around for the wine opener. All of Levi’s utensils and kitchen gadgets in the drawer were neatly arranged, the wine opener right on top.

“Cheers. I prepare a decent tea.”

Eren caught the smirk playing on Levi’s lips. “Hey, there’s no need to pour salt in the wound. Low blow.”

Levi rested the hot pan of food on top of the stove, slipped off the mitts, and walked over towards Eren.

“I like your voice too,” Levi said in an undertone, grey eyes dark as they met Eren’s. “Not as annoying as other American accents I’ve heard.”

Come and kiss me, Eren thought a little desperately, but Levi set the plates down on the table instead. His brain felt a little broken. Unhelpful thoughts like Are we dating now? and When are we going to make out? made it difficult to focus on his food.

As they ate, the sky opened up without warning. Rain pounded down on the skylight, leaving violent slashes of water against the glass. The nearby shops and pubs still sent in some light through the darkening sky. Eren periodically looked up to watch the rain, smiling each time.

“Do you watch the rain in here a lot?” Eren asked.

“Yes,” Levi said. “It’s quite nice to listen to the rain and read a book. I fall asleep on that armchair more often than I should.”

When they were finished eating they moved to the couch, and as the wine flowed, the conversation loosened their tongues. Soon Eren was telling Levi: “I saved up to buy these stupid Abercrombie clothes in high school. It’s silly, but I’m still proud of myself that I got them all on my own. It’s what all the cool kids were wearing.” Eren rolled his eyes, but his words were sincere.

“I shouldn’t have teased you,” Levi said apologetically. “I thought you were a bit of a lad at first.”

“A what?"

"A 'bro'" Levi said.

"Oh. Nah. Just a poor kid who will wear the same shirt until it has holes everywhere and someone in his family just throws it out for him.” Usually that someone was Mikasa.

“It’s nice you’re close to your family,” Levi said.

“Are you not?”

“I don’t have any family to be close to.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” Eren asked.

“Not much to say. Never met my dad, and my mum died when I was young. My uncle raised me, but he died a few years back too. Only good thing he left me was his house.” Levi’s eyes went somewhere far away, and Eren touched his hand carefully as though he were reaching for a broken bit of glass. Levi looked up at Eren in surprise, but didn’t pull away.

“I’m sorry,” Eren said. “My dad died when I was about thirteen, and it was really hard on the family. Thus the, uh, money shit I mentioned. But at least I had the rest of my family, I’m sorry you were alone.”

“Wasn’t completely alone. I grew up with two of my friends, and they’ve always been like family.”

Eren’s heart warmed at the fondness in Levi’s voice when he mentioned his friends. He liked learning these details of Levi’s life.

“What’s the rest of your family like then?” Levi asked.

“I’ve been told I have an interesting family.” Eren always felt self-conscious explaining the tedious intricacies of his family, but he might as well get it over with. “My sister Mikasa’s adopted, and my brother--half-brother--Zeke was adopted by my mom when she and our dad got married. His mom died when he was a baby.” Eren sighed. “My mom and Mikasa are the best, but Zeke is a fucking mess.”

Levi furrowed his brow. “How’s that?”

It seemed impolite to get into the fact that Zeke owed him close to a thousand dollars. Eren swallowed down the resentment and said instead, “I used to really look up to Zeke. He was my hero. I was a freshman when he was a senior in high school, and he just seemed like he had it all together. So popular, like really charismatic, head of the debate team, which sounds dorky but he made it look cool.”

Eren paused, worried that he was being a boring buzzkill, but Levi nodded for him to continue.

“Something happened after he graduated. He’s different now. It’s like he just got stuck, I don’t know.”

“Death in the family can do that to a person,” Levi said in his calm, neutral way.

“Maybe,” Eren said. The anger coming back up again. Over the years he’d heard these same explanations from his mother--“Zeke lost his mother and now his father, Eren. Cut him some slack.”--But he was tired of breaks and excuses.

He changed the subject before he began a rant that was difficult to disengage from, always a car with broken brakes. “My mom and my sister might be coming to visit me in a couple months.”

“That’s nice,” Levi said.

“Yeah, they’ve never been here before. Mikasa hasn’t even left the country, so I think it would be really cool if it works out. I’d love to show them the city.”

Levi nodded and refilled their wine glasses. Eren was at that beautiful point where he felt relaxed, funnier. He didn’t want to get sloppy tonight, not when he wanted to impress Levi. Wanted to make him feel good.

“So you like living in London then?” Levi asked.

“More than anything.” Even though the loneliness could be overwhelming sometimes, he’d lived with that feeling for most of his life. It was better here than it had ever been back home. The sense of freedom trumped all.

Levi gave him a small smile, taking a sip of wine.

“I’m glad I’m here,” Eren said, catching Levi’s eye from across the couch.

Levi knew what he meant. “Me too.”

You like me, Eren thought, the realisation knocking the air out of him all over again. The first time he’d ever hiked to the top of a mountain and stared out at the vast green forest below, the mountains in the distance, he’d had this same feeling.

Without breaking eye contact, Levi set his wine glass down with a gentle clink against the wooden table, and they moved together; Eren climbed into Levi’s lap to lick into his mouth, and Levi’s fingers slid up his shirt in reply. The only sounds in the room were the rain hitting the glass above them, the soft sounds of their lips moving together.

“What do you like, Eren?” Levi asked in an undertone that made heat coil in Eren’s belly.

“Umm a lot things,” Eren said, and then internally chastised himself for being so unsexy. Buzzed from the wine, he bit his lip and then said, “I like to be spanked sometimes. Nothing too crazy, but yeah.”

“Huh.” Levi nodded. “I wondered.”

“What? How?”

“Dunno. You seemed to really like begging for me. And there was a moment when I--” he reached over carefully and tugged Eren’s hair not too forcefully but enough that the promise of more made Eren’s cock take interest.

Amazed, Eren said, “Oh. Wow, you noticed that.”

Levi gave him a small smile. “Do you want me to take care of you, Eren?”

Wide-eyed and turned on as fuck, Eren nodded.

“Let me take you to bed?”

Eren surged forward and kissed him again, the words making him burn all over. That loop began to play through his head again. Holy fuck Levi is taking me to bed. Who even says that? Take me anywhere, fuck.

In a tangle, they made it to the bedroom, Eren unable to resist pulling Levi in for kiss after kiss.

Eren stepped back to strip off his shirt, and a thrill shot through him at Levi’s appreciative look. He reached forward and pulled Levi’s shirt off too, sighing with pleasure, running his fingers down the thick, corded muscles of Levi’s abs and arms.

“God damn,” Eren said with awe.

Levi smirked, and Eren watched eagerly as he removed the rest of his clothes, heavy cock curving up towards his belly. Hot desire flared within Eren, and he stepped forward to touch Levi again, to get his hands anywhere he could.

Eren’s cock strained against his jeans, and mercifully Levi unzipped them, tugging them down along with his boxers. The room was warm, but a shivery thrill shot through Eren as his dick sprang free.

“You make me so fucking hard,” Eren said, arousal pulsing through his whole body as he pushed Levi onto the bed and straddled him. They made out on top of Levi’s crisp, freshly washed sheets. They still smelled like detergent, and damn Eren even liked Levi’s detergent.

“Let me suck your dick this time,” Levi said lowly, gripping Eren’s ass and urging him forward until his cock bobbed in front of Levi’s lips.

Head tilted up, Levi began teasing the underside of Eren’s cock with his tongue, lapping gently as he kneaded Eren’s ass. Without warning, he began to suck, hands guiding Eren into a steady rhythm. A string of nonsensical obscenities was all Eren could manage as Levi worked his magic, taking Eren deeper and deeper.

Levi opened his eyes to meet Eren’s, holding his gaze as he angled his head and began to run his lips up and down the side.

“You ever tried that one before, Eren? The harmonica technique, apparently.”

“Fuck you.” Eren gave a shaky laugh, a little relieved to have the edge taken off. He’d thought he was already about to blow his load on Levi’s face, and just the thought of it made his dick throb.

Levi began to lick the head of Eren’s cock again, but Eren stopped him. “I want to touch you too.” And if Levi kept going, he wouldn't be able to keep it together.

He moved so they were laying side by side. He dragged a hand down the soft hair of Levi’s happy trail and through the coarser pubic hair, playing with Levi’s cock which was so hard in his hands.

“Lube’s in the bedside table to your left.” Levi sounded breathless.

Eren grabbed the lube and slicked both of their hands with it so they could fist each other’s cocks while they made out, their moans swallowed up by each searing kiss. Levi did double duty, fingering Eren open while he jerked him off until Eren couldn’t take anymore and got on all fours. “Fuck me,” he pleaded.

Levi got on his knees and pulled a condom from the bedside drawer. He ran his hands over Eren’s ass, and Eren pushed his hips back. “Come on, Levi.”

He moaned in relief when Levi pushed all the way inside, caressing Eren’s back all the while.

Buried balls deep in him, Levi stayed still. “You sure you’re ready?” he asked quietly.

“Y-yes,” Eren said.

“Tell me if it’s too much.”

“I will,” he promised.

The first slap came then, and a jolt of electricity shot to Eren’s dick. Head thrown back, he groaned. “God yeah, that’s good. More.”

Levi began to move with slow, even thrusts as he let another slap land on Eren’s other cheek.

“Fuckkk,” Eren cried, letting his hips sink down so he could grind himself against the bed. He needed that sweet friction to ease some of the throbbing in his cock. His arms were already quivering in anticipation, and he didn’t think he could support himself one-handed if he tried to touch himself.

Another smack, the sweet bite of pain and pleasure was almost too much as Levi continued to fuck him slowly. “Hips up,” Levi said. “I’ll touch you when I’m ready.”

“You’re evil,” Eren moaned as he raised himself back up, shocked by how fucked out he sounded already. They’d barely even been at it, but it was like he’d been waiting his whole life for someone to do this to him. One or two people over the years had tried, but never like this. They hadn’t taken it seriously, not like Levi was.

Levi hummed in acknowledgement. “You’re doing so well, Eren,” he said as he quickened his pace. Eren never knew when the next spark of pleasure-pain was going to land. The anticipation, the inability to relieve the ache in his cock made his head dizzy with pleasure, cock leaking pearly fluid onto Levi’s sheets. Eren struggled to hold himself up, but wanted to please Levi.

He lost time like that, lost himself in the feeling of Levi inside him and the sweet, steady sting.

Levi hit that sweet, perfect spot as he thrust deep inside of him. He slapped Eren’s ass again, harder this time, and Eren nearly sobbed with torturous pleasure. He had never felt so exposed during sex before, so open about what he wanted. Never had someone give him exactly what he needed.

“Levi, I don’t know if I can--god, please, touch me.”

Levi pulled out of him and Eren whimpered.

“Turn over,” Levi commanded, voice husky as he ran his fingers down Eren’s spine, making him shiver. “On your back.”

Eren complied, body bonelessly falling back against the bed.

When he looked up, the expression on Levi’s face stole his breath away. Levi’s hair had fallen in front of his eyes, sticking to his forehead. Chest and cheeks tinted red. Lips parted as he gazed at Eren with raw desire.

“You want me.” Eren gazed up at Levi, dumbstruck by the hunger in Levi’s eyes.

Levi crawled forward, placing his hands on either side of Eren’s head. “What gave me away?” he asked dryly. Christ, that voice would be the death of him.

“Fuck me,” Eren said, somewhere between a plea and an order. “Now. I need you.”

Levi reached down and slid himself back inside of Eren.

Levi bent forward to nibble at Eren’s lips and finally wrapped a hand around his aching cock.

“You were so good for me,” Levi whispered against Eren's lips, his hand working Eren’s dick in tandem with his deep thrusts.

Eren whimpered at the praise, throwing his head back against the pillow in ecstacy. “Levi--I can’t--I’m gonna--” Eren’s orgasm crashed over him, and he cried out, fingers digging into Levi’s biceps as he came so hard he thought he might pass out.

A few more thrusts and Levi followed suit, Eren still light-headed. Their sweat-slicked chests heaved against one another as they caught their breath. Levi pulled out carefully; he brushed Eren’s hair out of his eyes before going to retrieve a towel to clean them both up.

As they lay together after, facing one another in the bed, Eren asked, “You really liked that, didn’t you?”

Levi paused, considering the question. “I liked how much you liked it.”

“Oh. I hope I didn’t make you do anything you didn’t want to?” The idea of anyone sacrificing their own pleasure for him was troubling.

Levi shifted closer and reached out a hand to cup Eren’s cheek. “Course not,” he said, and Eren relaxed.

“Hey, do you think we could go into the living room while it’s raining?” Eren asked. “I really like your skylight.”

“Sure.” Levi gave him a skeptical look. “You need me to carry you?”

“No, no. I’m fine,” Eren said, but he was shakier on his feet than he anticipated as he tugged on his boxers. He leaned into Levi as they walked through to the living room.

They fell asleep together on the couch as they watched the rain. Eren’s head rested on Levi’s chest as he felt gentle fingers carding through his hair, soothing him along with the pitter-patter against the roof.

Before Eren gave himself up to sleep, hints of fear crept in. Years ago there had been a small earthquake in Eren’s hometown. His dog had paced nervously around the living room, growling and whimpering in anticipation before any of them knew what was coming. It felt a bit like that. The knowing you were probably going to fall in love, that you were probably going to be heartbroken. A tsunami on the horizon.

They woke to the first rays of sunlight overhead, and Levi fucked him again. He pinned Eren’s hands above his head and moved so, so slowly. Eren writhed underneath him, trying to gain leverage to speed up the agonizing pace.

“Beg me,” Levi whispered, and Eren shivered.

“Do you like it when I beg you?” he asked.

Levi didn’t answer, but he stroked his thumb over Eren’s cheekbone, and Eren begged and begged and begged.

Please don’t make me go, Eren begged silently, later, when they were showered and dressed.

“I’ll make you breakfast,” Levi offered. “What would you like?”

“Pancakes, maybe?”

Levi nodded and retrieved a pan off of the rack, but paused at the stove. “What kind of pancakes do you mean?”

“Oh. Well chocolate chip if you have them. Or fruit.”

“No. I mean, your American ‘pancakes’ or real pancakes.”

Eren furrowed his brow.

“You’d call them crepes.” Levi sighed, as though it pained him greatly to say this.

“I definitely didn’t mean crepes. Do you need a recipe? My mom emailed me her favorite one.”

“You’re head chef, then,” Levi said, stepping aside. He pulled his apron off its hook, and hung it over Eren. There it was, that full body heat again as Levi reached around to tie off the apron. “I’ve only got one, so head chef wears it.”

Eren nodded mutely. If you had asked him yesterday if one of the things he valued in a man was owning an apron, he would have thought it was a joke. Now it was a must-have, a deal-maker.

Cooking in Levi’s kitchen was so much better than in Eren’s shitty apartment. For one, there was so much room. Having the kitchen in the same area as the living room here meant he wasn’t constantly bashing into things like he was at home. There, if you tried to squeeze in more than one person, it became a huge pain in the ass to cook. Especially if it was Reiner whose shoulders took up half the room.

Levi stood by his side and measured out all the ingredients as Eren instructed, diligently converting the measurements without looking them up.

“It’s amazing you can do that so easily,” Eren said, impressed.

“I have a PhD in statistics, and I cook with my friend Hanji,” Levi said, and Eren didn’t miss the side-stepping of the compliment. “American too. They’ve lived here for a decade now and still learned next to nothing.”

“Oh, wow,” Eren said, “that’s a long time.”

Levi hummed in acknowledgement.

“I think it used to be a lot easier to stay over here,” Eren added a little sadly. He thought of all the companies he couldn’t even apply to without having a permanent visa.

“It certainly did.” Levi finished leveling out the second cup of flour, his tone neutral, unconcerned.

Eren felt a flicker of disappointment; Levi didn’t seem bothered that Eren might be leaving after the summer, but of course that was ridiculous. So they’d fucked a couple times, said they wanted to see where things went, and now they were cooking breakfast together. He thought of his dog pacing, reminded himself to slow down.

Love had always burned so bright and quick for him. Flamed in and out in the blink of an eye. A supernova. Maybe he wasn’t even capable of long-term love, so worrying about the end of the summer was a waste of time.

Eren finished mixing the batter and heated some butter in the pan. He was watching the butter slowly dissolve, so he didn’t see Levi moving closer to reach his arm around Eren’s waist and rest a hand on his hip.

“Hi,” Eren said dumbly.

“Hi,” Levi replied.

They stood like that for a moment, watching each other without a word. Levi had such beautiful, angular features. The way his grey eyes weighed on Eren, the hint of affection in them, was enough to render Eren speechless. It was only the sound of the butter sizzling that broke the spell.

The conversation between them was subdued as they ate the fluffy pancakes, Eren lost in thought over when he would see Levi again.

“Not bad.” Levi hummed with approval as he ate. “Not as good as ours, though.”

“Shut up. They’re better.” Eren smiled around his fork.

After, they cleared the plates together, and then it felt like time for Eren to head off. The oddest feeling passed through him, like a ghost. He already missed Levi.

“I should probably get going. Get out of your hair,” Eren said, rubbing the back of his neck. He wanted Levi to put his hands on him again, but they stayed apart.

Levi nodded. “Yeah. I’ve got papers to grade.”

He followed Eren into the entryway, quiet as Eren put his shoes on.

“What next?” Eren asked, looking up at Levi.

“I don’t know,” Levi replied. He leaned back against the wall, watching Eren, expression unreadable.

Eren stood and kissed Levi. He still felt like Levi could change his mind at any moment, and he didn’t want to waste a precious second. Pulling back, he said, “Want to--I don’t know--catch a movie later this week?”

“Yeah, alright.”

Eren smiled. “I’ll text you.”

“Right. I better get to work. Papers aren’t going to grade themselves.”

Eren was halfway home when he realised that Levi hadn’t sent him back with the crappy tea after all. The bag hadn’t been by the door when he’d left; Eren would have noticed.

He felt a stirring of hope, of possibility, in his chest. It was the same feeling he’d felt when he’d decided he needed a change in his life, when he submitted his application for his Master’s, when he’d first stepped off the plane to a new beginning.

#ereri #snkartists network #ereri fanfic #fic: intro to data science #snk #aot #my writing

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petri808 · 6 years

Text

Right in Front of You

Fic Writer’s Appreciation- January 2018 Writing Challenge January (2018) Day 14 Present

AU NaLu Story

The young blonde cheerleader had a lot of friends throughout high school. Beautiful and friendly, she could bounce through any clique she wanted, the popular kids, jocks, geeks, it didn’t seem to matter, but her core group of friends at Fairytail high was really a mish-mosh of all the above. They were kids that grew up together since the days of tag and jungle gyms, though adolescence and puberty, till finally adulthood was right around the corner.

But among this group there was one, a boy that she was closest to over all of them. Natsu and Lucy had lived just a few doors down from each other and since their parents had been friends, play dates started before they could even walk. So, it was no surprise that the two would share a special bond.

For her, Natsu was like the brother her parents never gave her, and he watched over her like one, fiercely protective and supportive. It was obvious by 9th grade that his feelings toward Lucy had changed from merely a friend to a more romantic once but she couldn’t see him that way and it hurt.

Every time she’d break up with a boyfriend, it was his shoulder she would cry on; and he’d grin and bear it. Every time she celebrated a win in Cheer or acing a test, it was in his arms she’d find herself; and he’d gladly take it. But every time he’d broach the idea of them... she’d pull away. Why?

All through high school this charade went on, and continued even after graduation when she left for college in a different city and he stayed behind at the local university. They kept in touch through texts and social media, sometimes spending hours on the phone, especially when she was having a bad day; he was there for her. Lucy visited during her first winter break and spent much of her time hanging out with him. Spring break came, same deal.

Finally, her first summer vacation from college and the young woman was ready for a long break from school. Natsu picked her up at the airport like he usually did, and they made plans to hang out with their friends. Everyone was home for the summer but there were a few new faces in the bunch.

Levy had met a guy in college, Gray a new girl, but there was also one more that had started hanging with them, a student at Magnolia U. According to Levy, Lisanna was in a couple of Natsu’s classes and one day just started coming around. But Lucy thought nothing of it, Natsu wasn’t her boyfriend so if he was interested in another girl, that was his choice.

Besides, he sure didn’t act like he was. From the moment Lucy arrived home, he was glued to her hip like nothing had changed. Part of her felt bad for the other girl when she could see the hurt in her eyes, but maybe a small part of her was happy that she didn’t have to share him with someone else. It was selfish, of course, it’s not like she’d ever put his feeling first when she dated other guys, but she figured if he didn’t like it, wouldn’t he say something?

It’s amazing how quickly time flies when your having fun and before she knew it, Fall semester would be starting up in just a couple of weeks. Some days, Lucy wondered, was there a good reason why she had chosen to go away for college since most of her closest friends all stayed home? Magnolia U and Crocus U offered similar programs, were ranked the same, and tuition wasn’t the issue.

And tonight, that question came up again but not by her, but Natsu. He had taken her to the bluffs overlooking the lake where they could relax and lie back on the hood doing something she enjoyed; stargazing. It was a special place for the long-time friends, one that only they shared and no one else, going there ever since they were allowed to go out at night on their own.

She was using his arm like a pillow, as they chatted…

“Luce, could I ask you something?”

“Of course, you can.” She turns her head to look at him.

But his eyes stay facing the sky, “Why’d you go so far away for college?”

“Honestly, sometimes I ask myself the same question. I think I just wanted to experience something different.”

“Don’t you miss having your friends around all the time, I mean I’m sure you’ve made plenty more in Crocus, but, do you ever miss… me?”

“I do miss everyone, especially you, and I’ve made some friends, but I focus mostly on school while I’m there. I don’t even want a boyfriend until I finish college.”

He turns his head away, “Oh.”

“Why the sudden question, Natsu?”

“It’s nothing…”

Lucy props her head up, “I know you Mr. Dragneel,” turning his face towards her, “if something is bothering you just tell me.”

He exhales, “What would you do if there was someone you liked, and they didn’t seem to feel the same way too, would you try to find out, or would you just move on?”

The young girl blinks, she hadn’t expected that kind of question. “Well,” she bites her lip, “I really don’t know since I’ve never had that happen to me.”

“Don’t worry,” he fakes a smile, “Forget I asked,” and changes the subject. “Are you excited for Fall semester?”

“MmHmm,” she nods, “The classes I have are gonna be hard, but I’m looking forward to the Creative Writing class.”

“That’s good, you always were an amazing writer.” He looks back to the sky, “It’s such a beautiful night… I wish it never had to end.”

“Yeah…” Lucy lies back too. But her mind is swimming by that last comment, and the way his voice sounded was so sad. She can see through a side glance that his brows had furrowed like he was still thinking about something…

By mid-September, Lucy was certain, something was amiss. She and Natsu’s daily and constant text messages had dwindled to every few days, their often hour, long phone calls became shorter and shorter and she was lucky if she spoke to him once a week. Finally, she asked him about it one day and he feigned being busy with school, classes were harder, football season, etcetera; but she didn’t believe him.

It was Levy who confirmed it, Natsu had a girlfriend and it was the one she met during the summer. ‘Why didn’t he just tell me,’ Lucy sat in her dorm after the news. Why hide such information? Did he think she’d get upset? It’s not like they were a couple or anything. She’s angrier that she had to find out from Levy than if he had just been honest with her himself. All those excuses he gave her…

She grabs her phone ready to give him a tongue lashing. ‘But what if he’s with her right now?’ the phone drops back to her lap. ‘I could leave a message if he doesn’t answer… No if I call now, how will that make me look? Desperate, a fool?’

“Ugh!” she drops onto her back on the bed. “Whatever! If he wants a girlfriend let him! What do I care!” Sighing, ‘Why the hell am I getting so angry!’ and curling into a ball, Lucy feels like, like she’s lost him… Images of his smiling face, memories of his embrace, pictures after pictures, too many over their lifetime reminding her how close they once were. He was always there for her, always…

“What would you do if there was someone you liked, and they didn’t seem to feel the same way too, would you try to find out, or would you just move on?” It was like a ton of bricks falling on the young blonde, ‘Natsu, had you been talking about me?’ Now all those memories seemed to be telling a different tale, not of two friends but something that should have been more.

Lucy clicks the home button on her iPhone revealing the lock screen of her and Natsu at Senior Prom. She had been staring straight at the camera smiling and he had been looking at her. Up till now, the young girl just thought it was cute picture of the two of them having fun but as she looks closer at the image, his eyes… they were… ‘Oh my God! I’m such an idiot!’ …filled with longing…

A pain in her heart, stabbing, searing; she clutches at her chest as the dam bursts and tears flood down her cheeks faster than her sobs could keep up with. As a little girl she would dream about finding her soulmate and living happily ever after like in a fairytale and all this time, all this time; he had been right in front of her.

“…I wish it never had to end…” She hears his voice again, the sadness of its tone, replaying like a broken record and she bangs her head with her fists trying to make them stop. How could she give up everything she’s ever known? Natsu had always been there, 19 years… You can’t just make 19 years of memories vanish… But, there’s no way she can face him now. She was too embarrassed and a little angry at both herself and him. ‘Why didn’t he just tell me how he felt!?’

After that night, and that revelation Lucy avoided all contact with Natsu, though she didn’t have the heart to block his number. When he called, she let it go to voice mail, when he texted, they went unread and what had begun with less contact by him reversed by the first week of October. He was calling or texting multiple times a day, sending messages through social media, even friends began contacting her concerned if she was okay. With them she acted like she was fine, never telling the real reason she was blowing him off, but with him, silence.

Fall break came, and she didn’t go home.

By the beginning of November, Natsu’s contacts slowed down. He was still calling or texting daily but not in multiples. But the messages were growing sadder, even his posts on Instagram were becoming depressing. Their friends begged her to contact him, but she refused, making up excuses that she was simply giving him space… since he had a girlfriend.

Winter break came, but she stayed in Crocus.

On Christmas Day, Natsu left her a phone message wishing her a Merry Christmas, saying he wished she had come home because he misses her. It hurt, she wasn’t gonna lie. So finally, she sent him the first text message in months, simply reading ‘Merry Christmas too’.

Her parents were aware of what she was doing, it was unavoidable since she had to explain not coming home to visit. They told her the Dragneels were concerned about their son and she, and they agreed with them that this rift was becoming ridiculous. But she told them she was still angry that to this day, he has still not told her the truth about his girlfriend. If he was such the friend he was supposed to be, why hadn’t he been honest with her, she spat back. They were both young and inexperienced in such matters was her mother’s response and she should just forgive him. I’ll think about it is all the young girl could agree to.

Valentines Day.

That morning was like any other for the college girl, with no significant other, she went about her day, going to class, and returning to her dorm by 3pm. But around 4:30 there is a knock at the door and a courier standing there with a dozen long stemmed red roses and a small red box. Thinking maybe she had a secret admirer or something she carries the items to her bed and pulls out the card; it was from Natsu.

She blinks, ‘Is he crazy? Why the hell would he send me something for Valentines day? And if that girlfriend of his ever found out…’ but her eyes grow wide when she opens the box for inside is a silver promise ring and it’s engraved, ‘Natsu and Lucy Forever’. Taking the card out of it’s envelope, she reads the message…

“Lucy, I don’t know what else to say at this point except, I’m sorry. Whatever I did to hurt you, I’m sorry. And now, I just… No matter if you never forgive me, please know you will be the only girl I’ll ever truly love. Forever yours, Natsu”

And as if there had been a camera watching her, her phone pings alerting her to a message. She’s almost afraid to read it but she opens the text and it’s a picture of his left hand, a matching ring on his finger. Her hand flies up to her mouth, ‘Impossible! No way his girlfriend would allow that!’ But the gesture tugs at her heartstrings, Lucy may be angry, but she doesn’t hate him, she may not have forgiven him yet, but, ‘I still love him too…’

So, she puts the ring on a chain around her neck for now.

Spring Break.

In no uncertain terms her family tells her she’s coming home for a visit whether she likes it or not, and Levy and the others had been threatening to kidnap her and drag her back to Magnolia too if she didn’t so what choice did she have? Lucy missed them terribly, she just hoped to avoid Natsu while she was home, but it’s too bad for Lucy because they had other plans.

As she walked through the jetway, a part of her hoped Natsu would be standing at his car waiting for her at the curb like their routine had been but how could he when he shouldn’t even know she was home, right? Her head hung down, maybe Levy and her parents had been right, maybe it was time she forgave him, I mean he was a guy and guys do dumb things all the time, plus it wasn’t all his fault either, part of the blame lay with her for being blind.

Grabbing her suitcase from the baggage claim… Even if he had a girlfriend, Natsu was still the closest person to her. No one else, except maybe Levy as a close second knew her better. But it would be awkward, if Lucy put herself in Lisanna’s shoes, what girlfriend would put up with their boyfriend being so close to another girl? Making her way out to the curb…

“Lucy?”

A familiar voice. She looks up. “N-Natsu? What are you doing here?” ‘Are those bags under his eyes? He doesn’t look like he’s getting any sleep.’

“I always pick you up at the airport.” He takes the suitcase from the frazzled girl.

“B-but you weren’t supposed to know I was coming.”

He frowns, “I know, but your parents asked me to get you.”

‘They are gonna hear it from me!’ she screams in her head. “Alright fine, just take me straight home.”

Natsu doesn’t respond, just simply puts her bag in the trunk and get into the car. Lucy sits in the passenger side and stares out the window as they head away from the airport. ‘Weren’t you on the verge of forgiving him?’ her conscious chimes, ‘Tch, I didn’t say that.’ ‘Admit it, stop being angry and just get it over with…’

She sighs, and props her head with her hand. Natsu looks over but doesn’t say anything. Holding in all these emotions, especially the anger was becoming taxing on her. Lucy had never been one to hold a grudge for so long against anyone and she despised feeling negative. But maybe it had more to do with the person rather than the situation. Since Natsu was such a large part of her existence, his affects on her were also amplified.

Closing her eyes, another sigh, ‘I can’t keep doing this, it hurts too much…’

When she opens her eyes again, it’s only at that point that she realizes they are going in the opposite direction from her parent’s house. She turns to the Natsu, “Where are you taking me? I said I wanted to go straight home.”

Staring straight at the road, “I know you did, but we’re going to our spot first.”

“Our spot? You can’t just kidnap me…”

“You damn well know I’d never do anything to hurt you Luce,” he sighs, “But we need to talk.”

“Fine,” she looks away again, “what choice do I have…”

When he stops the car, Natsu doesn’t even wait for her to get out before he does and sits on his hood with his head hung. Lucy’s parents had asked him two days ago to pick her up at the airport despite knowing the two friends weren’t talking. But both her parents and his told him he, they needed to fix this and now. He had spent these couple of days in dread trying to figure out what he was going to say to her.

They were right, Natsu knew they were right. Everyone told him she was hurting just as much as he was, and they were both being stubborn. But that assessment wasn’t fair, at least in his mind because he had tried, and tried talk to her but what could he do if she wasn’t responding, wasn’t answering, hell not coming home? The rings he bought, they weren’t exactly cheap! Another problem was he didn’t know why she was avoiding him and no one knew the full answer either.

Lucy sat there for several minutes just watching him through the windshield. She could be a bitch and refuse to get out of the car but… Things were so much easier when she was miles away and they weren’t face to face because looking at him… the pain he was feeling, the low energy of the usually gregarious young man, it was killing her.

She gets out and leans on the closed passenger door. “Well, you wanted to talk, so, talk.”

“Why are you mad at me Lucy?”

“Are you serious? You really haven’t figured it out by now?”

He looks at her, “If I had, don’t you think I would have tried to fix it?!”

“Tch, I don’t know,” looking away, “I mean you were stupid enough to do it in the first place.”

“Do what!” he walks over and traps her between his arms. “Just tell me what I did!”

She faces him and narrows her eyes, “Pick a reason! You started dating that girl and you didn’t tell me. You started not answer my texts or calls and the times you did answer our conversations got shorter and shorter. Then the excuses of why you weren’t talking to me like we used to…” Tears are streaming down her face, but her anger is a train without brakes. “…I knew it didn’t sound right but you kept lying and I finally got it out of Levy that it’s cause you had a girlfriend!”

Punching his chest, “You’re my best friend, my best friend!” she hits his chest again, “And yet you lied to me and kept lying to me. Why keep her a secret? What the hell were you so afraid of that you couldn’t tell me the truth?!”

“You want the truth? Yes, I lied to you because I didn’t want you to think I was moving on. You said on these bluffs last summer you didn’t like anyone and that broke my heart because, because… Ahh what does it matter anyways!” he slaps the door frame and walks away to the edge of the cliffs. Looking at the sky, “You just couldn’t see what was right in front of your face all along.”

“And what’s that?” she responds, but her voice is trembling

Hanging his head, “How much I love you.”

“But, you have a girlfriend…”

“Had, Luce, I broke up with her by the end of September once I realized no one could ever take your place in my heart.”

Lucy pulls the chain from around her neck and slips the ring on. Her parents were right, she needed to fix this too.

“Natsu…” she wraps her arms around him and leans her cheek against his back. “I’m sorry too. I-I had no idea you felt so strongly about me, a-and the truth is,” exhale, “I was angry that you lied but, I was angrier at myself for not seeing it sooner, and, I took that out on you. It was easier to blame you than to point the finger back at me.”

She squeezes, “I’m sorry! I’m so, sorry Natsu! I was such a bitch to you and that was wrong. You were right, I was too blind to see what was right in front of me.”

Lucy feels him unfurl the fingers on her left hand and rub over the ring, “You’re wearing it?” a bit of surprise in his tone.

He feels her nod, “From the moment I received it.”

“I… didn’t think you would…” Natsu’s voice stutters.

Letting go, Lucy walks around to face him and takes his left hand, rubbing over his ring, “This is a beautiful gift…” she looks up at him and smiles, “I can’t change the past, and I can’t guarantee the future but now, in this moment, I see what’s right in front of me.”

“And what’s that,” he caresses her cheek, rewarding her with the smile that always makes her feel better.

“How much I love you too…”

#veraspromptchallenge2018 #day14 present #nalu fanfiction #natsuxlucy #austory

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thisgirlsays22 · 6 years

Text

You Are Not Alone (Part 1)

Rating: E

Fandom: Shingeki no Kyojin

Pairing(s): Mikasa Ackerman/Jean Kirstein, Eren Yeager/ Levi

Word Count: 1.8K

Additional Tags: Post-canon, angst, smut More Tags On AO3

Summary:

Mikasa relishes in her newfound sense of freedom. Loneliness does not mean she is alone.

A prequel and sequel to Home and I Know (I Am the One in Love).

Written for the wonderful @dreamxxdream as a (belated) birthday gift. Nadine, you are a wonderful friend and I am very lucky to have you!

And thank you to @fluffymusketeer for the beta <3333

Read on Ao3 or under the cut.

The moment Levi arrived at her door, Mikasa knew that Eren’s happiness was just around the corner. She could sense it, the same way Sasha always sensed when they needed to slow their movements to sneak up on prey; the way Armin could sense when the political tide was turning against Historia; the way Jean could sense when Mikasa needed to be alone.

She had been taken aback by the unexpected sight of Levi on her front porch. “You’re not Jean.”

And she wasn’t Eren. Levi’s eyes flicked behind her to the dark corridor as though expecting him to be there, waiting.

“He’s not here.”

“I didn’t think he was.”

“You were hoping.”

Levi didn’t answer. Mikasa stepped aside to let him in, and directed him to her small living room. She gestured for him to sit on the sofa--imported from Marley, a gift from Sasha and Connie when she’d moved in--and went to fetch a tray of tea and biscuits from the kitchen.

While the tea was boiling she assembled the tea set, a housewarming gift from Jean, white and delicate with tiny blue birds painted through the center of each cup and all around the teapot. She stared down at the tray, and her thoughts drifted to Eren, as they often did, about whether now he’d come home or if Levi’s return would send him further into the forest of his self-imposed exile.

“He’s living in a stupid cabin now,” she announced as she placed the tray in front of Levi, pushing the plate of biscuits towards him.

Levi was dressed more casually than Mikasa was used to--no cravat, simple black shirt and casual trousers--but his back was rigid, posture perfect as he gave her a short nod and reached for the tea. His expression remained impassive as ever, but Mikasa thought his eyes looked a little sadder than last she’d seen him.

“When did he leave?”

She shrugged. “Not too long after you.”

Levi’s hand briefly stilled as he brought the cup to his lips. Mikasa took note of the hesitation with mild interest.

“Jean’s going to visit him.” She peered at Levi as she took a delicate sip from her cup. “I was actually expecting him to stop by today before he left.”

“Hm.”

“Jean wouldn’t mind if you went instead. It’ll stop him from complaining.”

“Does Eren keep the place clean?”

“You know better than anyone that he was always the best at cleaning.”

Levi gave her a small smile. “Yeah, the Corps should have given him a damn medal.”

She returned the smile and was about to ask about Marley when there was a knock at the door, sharp and precise.

This time it was Jean, dressed in his work clothes. Crisp, white button-down over his most sensible trousers. His hair was neat, perfectly styled, and she looked forward to the damage she’d wreck on it.

“Hey,” he said, hands landing on her waist, head tilting forward to kiss her.

“I have company,” she said, touching a hand to his chest. He straightened, disappointment clouding his face.

He followed her through to the living room, visibly surprised when he spotted Levi. Jean straightened instinctively, and for a moment Mikasa thought he might salute. Levi had been gone long enough that he could be excused for reverting to old habits.

“It’s good to see you, si--Levi.” Jean corrected himself smoothly as Levi arched an eyebrow.

“You too, Jean.”

“I’ll be in Marley in a few weeks for work. I was going to see if you were free for a meal.”

A thought occurred to Mikasa. “You saw each other last time Jean was in Marley, didn’t you?”

“Yes, that's right,” Jean said, and Levi nodded.

That had been right before Eren’s departure, hadn’t it? Before his childish rant about how nowhere felt like home.

In his letters he sounded lonely, but nothing she wrote brought him back. A new strategy had appeared in her doorway today. He hadn’t exactly said yes earlier, though.

“Jean, you wouldn’t mind if Levi went to see Eren, would you?”

Levi eyed Mikasa warily.

“Oh, you mean a weekend in my own bed instead of on Eren’s floor? No, I don’t mind.”

“Sure, I’ll go,” Levi said, putting down his cup. “I suppose I could break his legs for you and drag him back home, if that’s what you want.”

“That won’t be necessary. You just need to bring him some supplies, make sure he hasn’t done anything too stupid,” Mikasa said.

“I’m not a miracle worker.”

“Better you than me.” Jean shrugged his jacket off and draped it over one of the chairs. “You can have a crack at him.”

“How are the others then?” Levi asked, brushing past Jean’s remark.

“Historia’s trying to raise the import taxes again,” Mikasa said.

Levi tilted his chin in Jean’s direction. “Bet you love that.”

Jean leant back in his chair, looking miserable. “It’s causing me no end of trouble, but that’s the job.”

“How’s your station?” Mikasa asked Levi.

“Paint drying would be more interesting. They’re a bunch of lazy bastards.”

“My recruits aren’t much better,” Mikasa said. “I’m glad they can afford to be soft, but…”

“If something happens they won’t be prepared.”

Mikasa nodded. “No matter how much we prepare them.”

“Well, that’s where I come in. I keep the peace.” Jean sat up straight and puffed up his chest.

The afternoon drifted by as they eased back into one another’s company. Jean stopped speaking so stiffly to Levi and started talking to him like a friend again. Levi’s posture relaxed and he laughed at Mikasa’s stories (mostly the one one’s that centred around Hanji and the latest batch of recruits they were wrangling).

When the sky started to darken, Levi stood to say his goodbyes. He cleared his throat, and said, “Give me the supplies for Eren, then. I’ll leave in the morning.”

She and Jean exchanged looks, and Levi looked annoyed.

“Let me get the bag,” she said.

Her love for Eren had always been as difficult to grasp as water. The cruel world as she knew it had revolved around him. A brother, a friend, the object of some indulgent, adolescent fantasties.

But over time that love had taken shape and settled. Strong and sure, but no longer all-consuming. It had still been painful to watch him struggle after the war, unable to help. As she sent Levi off with supplies and directions, she felt something ease in her chest.

After Levi was gone, Jean turned to her. “Do you think Levi’s going there to fuck some sense into him?”

“I have no idea anymore. I thought Levi just wasn’t…”

“Into men?”

“Into anyone.”

Jean wrinkled his nose. “Eren used to have it bad for him. It was embarrassing to watch.”

He was right. Eren had acted like a lovesick idiot at one point during their teens--earning himself both good and ill-natured teasing. His mooning had petered out before the war have moved to Marleyan shores, but...after the war, no matter how miserable Eren could be, he always made space for Levi. They’d been friends.

“Whatever the hell is going on with them, I hope they figure it out,” she said. Then she strolled in the direction of her bedroom, a sway in her hips, and said over her shoulder, “Come on, Ambassador Kirschtein.”

Jean buttoned up his shirt, running a hand over it to smooth the wrinkles. “You’re still coming with me to the palace next week? For the fundraiser?”

She stood before him, still naked, and did up one of the buttons he’d missed. “Ask whoever you’re stringing along this week to go with you.”

Jean huffed, face red. “I’m not stringing anyone along,” he sputtered. “Just because the last date you went on was a year ago, doesn’t mean the rest of us can’t have any fun.”

She rolled her eyes. He was getting hard again as he looked at her, and she palmed his cock through his underwear. Jean stopped fussing with his shirt and pushed her back down on the bed, hovering over her.

“You already said you’d go,” he murmured, appealing to her honor rather than her sympathy. A clever strategy. His hard length pressed between her legs, and she rubbed herself against him, wanting more.

“Alright,” she conceded, pushing his shoulders down towards her naval. “I’m not going to dance, though.”

“Fine. I promise we won’t have any fun at all, and you can mope all you like.” He guided himself down until his head was between her legs, and she ran her fingers through the darker tips of his hair.

She laughed in spite of herself, smiling up at the ceiling as he began to tease her. “We could play practical jokes on Sasha again.”

Jean swirled his tongue around her clit, pace slow and even the way she liked, and when he looked up at her he grinned. “Oh yeah? What do you have in mind?”

“If she gets up to use the bathroom, hide some of her food.”

“She’d never leave her food unguarded.”

“It happened last time.”

“Well then, we’ll keep watch over Sasha’s food for the evening. Does that mean you’ll come?”

“Yes, I suppose it does.” Shit. This meant she’d have to buy a new dress.

Jean moved a hand up to rub her nipple between his fingers and she moaned, bucking her hips.

“Are you going to fuck me now, or what?” she asked.

Jean opened his mouth to reply, but she changed her mind. She pulled him up, wrapped her legs around him, and flipped them over. “Actually, this time I think I’ll fuck you.”

“Hell yeah,” Jean breathed, looking up at her reverently as she sank down on his cock.

Later, hand on the doorknob, he turned and asked her. “Do you really not care if I’m seeing other people?”

“I’ve already told you I don’t.”

He rubbed the back of his neck. “I wanted to check again. What you said earlier about stringing people along...I’m not...”

“I know,” she said. She was the problem, not Jean.

He nodded and stepped out into the night. She could have asked him to stay; he probably would have, despite the luncheon he was attending the next day. But the loneliness, the kind that hated company, wrapped its hands around her throat and kept the words from coming. Jean didn’t push the matter, but he gave her a quick kiss before he walked out the door.

That night, lying in her bed, she reached for her notebook on her bedside table and wrote:

You are not alone.

You are NOT alone.

Over and over until she hit the end of the page. She wrote them for herself, for Eren. As though she could will them to come true.

She’d taken to sleeping with things in the bed when Jean wasn’t there--clothes, notebooks, pens. In quiet moments like these, surrounded by the stillness of the night, the soft chirping of crickets outside her window, she let herself miss them all.

Of its own accord, her hand slid down the opposite side of the bed. She fell asleep with her notebook by her head.

#JeanKasa #Ereri #fanfic #snk #aot #my writing #fic: you are not alone

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