MAG 169, Fire Escape
MARTIN: Smite! Smite!
MARTIN: Gimme an S! Gimme a M! Gimme an I! Gimme a T! Gimme an E!
MARTIN: What’s that spell? Smite!
JON: Ok, the next domain is The Desolation.
JON: It’s a burning tenement and the avatar is inside. We’re gonna smite the @#$& out of that *&$#.
MARTIN: Inside…a burning building?
JON: Yep!
MARTIN: Will it hurt?
JON: Oh yes, I’ll feel every molecule of pain and despair.
MARTIN: …
MARTIN: I mean, will it hurt me?
JON: …
JON: I guess? But it’s a long way to London, I’m sure you’ll walk it off.
MARTIN: Hm.
MARTIN: Ok, new plan.
MARTIN: I’ll build an Archivist-sized trebuchet, and I’ll just yeet you in there so you can smite more efficiently.
MARTIN: The old yeet-n-smite maneuver.
MARTIN: Yeet! Yeet!
MARTIN: Annnd smite!
@a-mag-a-day
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MAG 169 Relisten
Activity on my first listen: cutting the Kolkwitzia amabilis in my garden.
JON: "Some fears don’t need to be intensified. Only manifested."
Hm, insufficient or blatantly negligent fire escapes are so common in apartment buildings… Often seen escape routes get affected negatively by tenants, leaving shoes and all kinds of obstacles in the hallway. Of course this in turn can be a consequence of too many people crammed into one flat because otherwise they can’t afford living there. What I absolutely hate, is when they do that in the hospital I work at. There is no excuse. Leaving wheelchairs or even beds in the hallway even though we have fire prevention and fire action training every year and every year it’s said, that this is not allowed.
Oh this episode shows a dark side of Jon. He didn’t tell Martin what was the deal with the fire, probably hoping he wouldn’t ask (since he’s getting a bit cagy there) because he wants to revenge himself on Jude.
This conversation really shows Alex‘s VA talent again. He‘s so good at portraying fear, panic, you can hear he’s on the verge of tears.
MARTIN:(overlapping) "I know! I know, okay, I just – (bracing exhale) Look, I j,just – don’t want to get burned, all right? It’s, it’s like my least favorite pain ever."
JON: "Is that – a joke?"
They really gotta work on their understanding of humour. Neither one knows when the other is making a joke or not.
MARTIN: (a bit faster, a bit shaky) "No, no, okay? I, I legitimately hate burns, alright? They’re, they’re awful, and they scar horribly, and they just – it – it just makes me sick; I, I hate it. Hate it!"
Hm, would love to hear what Jon would have thought about this. Like, thanks I know what it’s like to get properly burned... His hand is probably a hot mess, if you excuse the pun xD
JON: "Alright. If you really don’t want to do this, w-we can go another way."
MARTIN: (somewhat smaller) "Really?"
JON: "Really. My revenge… (long sigh) Well, let’s just say you’re more important."
After lots and lots of talking how much Martin hates this and is afraid Jon caves in. That is good to see. If it weren’t for what’s following…
JON: "Maybe? It’s… (inhale) Like I said, I can’t see the future. It wouldn’t free them, if that’s what you’re asking. ‘Free’ doesn’t really exist in this place."
MARTIN: "Apart from us."
One of those instances where Martin gets acutely aware of their privilege. Also, not sure what Jon's deal is here. That hesitant "maybe?". Does he legitimately not know or does he want to stay bit vague so Martin would be on board with going in. (Couldn't Jon just know how the merry-go-round is doing since he has destroyed the Not!Them?) I mean he's at least honest about the fact that's it not freeing the people trapped in here.
JON: "I – Oh, right: I want revenge on Jude Perry. I want to… smite her. Make her feel what – (sigh) What all her victims felt. But I’m not willing to force you to suffer for it."
MARTIN: "Okay. So it’s – (brief pause) I have to choose, do I?"
JON: "Or we could sit here."
MARTIN: "…No. No, I’m not going to choose; I don’t, I don’t think that’s a fair decision to put on me. It’s your revenge; your choice, not mine."
It’s good that Jon hears Martin’s feelings on this and actually tries to respect them. But yeah, putting that decision on Martin is complicated. It’s once again a shitty situation in which nobody wins (except that I think Jon also didn’t win. At least not in the way he wanted. But at least he’s one step closer to realizing that this is doing nothing).
[SILENCE.]
JON: "Fine. We go in."
I like the long pause. Jon‘s inner fight about what to do is almost audible. He probably thought if Martin really, reaaaally doesn’t want this he would have said so. As he said, he's not forcing Martin to suffer for it. And Martin bounced it back to Jon. Still, he’s putting his desire for revenge before Martin…
"Home. Such a simple word. Home – not house, not dwelling, not residence or address, not domicile or flat or lodging or abode or apartment or property or accommodation. Home."
How many synonyms xD
"And home is where that heart can be hurt most severely, because within that place of safety, the warm and welcoming embrace of the cramped and well-trod floors whose layout has ingrained itself into your soul, there you are most vulnerable."
A lot of people are not aware how much their home means safety. Even when things happen which limits people in the capacity of feeling at peace at their home (noise, aggressive neighbours etc.) Still, a lot of people underestimate what it can do with you when your home gets violated in one of those most horrible ways. Break-ins, catastrophes...
Usually I have problems following statements which ramble a lot about general premises, but here I find it super interesting. How that first part is just generally putting it all into words. What a home means, what's it to you, which bad things can happen to it, how you become aware of said bad things etc.
"Sabina senses it, feels it drawing near."
Okay, people who also had statement people with your name, how did it make you feel? Because it's such a jump scare every single time for me. It's also, I'm not used to hearing my name in media and when there actually is a character (Star Wars, Miraculous), it's always anglicized version with the silent E at the end. But the way Jonny pronounces the A at Sabina, it sounds so much like the German pronunciation of my name. I of course have no reference, but I also feel it's worse because it's one of the S5 statements and they are a lot closer to rl than some supernatural shit. I don't know, any other experiences with this?
MARTIN: (overlapping, coming into focus) "Jon, you idiot! Please go back!"
Why "you idiot"? Also is it really "please go back" or is it "please come back"? The official transcripts doesn't have this line at all, it's just Martin yelling "Jon!" again and again. "Pls come back" would make more sense because he wants him to snap out of his Eyepocalypse Guidesona. Maybe that "idiot" because I'd guess Jon lost all sense of his surroundings and marched ever deeper into the inferno.
I know there’s the debate about Martin slapping Jon awake. He already did it in MAG 160 and it will happen one more time I think? Complicated matter, it’s such a trope to slap someone awake, but it being a trope doesn’t make it okay. There is also the matter that this is an audio medium, how would you hear, say, shaking someone to snap them out of it? The olfactory sense is really sufficient, I think? But very rarely that people have something for that to use. Water would be audible, but there wasn’t really any at their disposal. Perhaps in MAG 160..? But yeah, a slap is audible in a way, that people know what’s going on.
JUDE: "Fancy seeing you both here. (sarcasm) To what, exactly, do I owe the pleasure – the honor – of being graced by the great and powerful Archivist, harbinger of this new world and his, mm… (deliberately obtuse) …valet?"
Oh god, I hate that mocking tone of Jude xD Also funny to see how everyone addresses Martin. Of course they don't know him, they're all like "who's that, what makes him so special that he's traveling with the Archivist?"
JUDE: What’s wrong? Scared of a little flame? (delighted) Oh, you are, aren’t you?"
[SHE LAUGHS.]
JUDE: "How pathetic."
MARTIN: (high) "Screw you!"
JON: "Leave him alone."
Ah yes, antagonizing Martin, not good. Still, don't know how much that actually does. Cause Simon... But also, Simon was never actively antagonizing Martin in front of Jon, he always seems rather polite and very funny.
JUDE: "Oh, I see. I get it. You finally get a sniff of power, and the first thing you do is try to settle some old scores. (enjoying this) Play the big man; get off on good old-fashioned petty revenge."
JON: (not in the mood for games) "I’d have thought that was a mindset you would appreciate."
She's not wrong, and he knows it.
JUDE: "I’m… happy in this world. I belong here. And so do you."
Jude has some very difficult but kinda true statements... The Archivist does belong here, the fear of others feels good to him. But with Jon it's not that easy.
MARTIN: (half screaming) "Just DIE already!"
JUDE: "You’re not – better – (audibly struggling) than – me!"
Also kind more of Martin's dark side. This overall stance of the revenge arc didn't really surprise me, especially not after S4. But directly shouting as someone "Just die already"... Also Jude again... Probably got a lot into Jon's head. Is he better? He surely has caused less pain on purpose than Jude did. I refuse to contribute the Eyepocalypse to Jon, he didn't know, he was tricked into this like all the others. I don't fault him for not wanting to die and also not for not immediately wanting to gouge his eyes out especially when he knew Martin wouldn't follow him and he therefore would have lost the last bit of influence/protection/support/whatever he could offer Martin. The thing about his statement victims is complicated as it seems that he does kind of need them to survive. Old statements wouldn't have done it forever. We saw in MAG 155 that the Fears want maximum pain out of all this... Love it, the entire moral dilemma! It's super interesting!
JON: "She’s gone."
MARTIN: "The fires are still here. Doesn’t look like much has changed."
JON: "No. I suppose not."
I would love to know if there was a thought behind this, if it was taken into account if Jon knew it wouldn't do anything, or if it's open, like it didn't matter for the character growth/narrative here.
@a-mag-a-day
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Home. Such a simple word. Home — not house, not dwelling, not residence or address — [...] not domicile or flat or lodging or abode or apartment or property or accommodation. Home.
A structure of brick or wood or concrete or canvas. A box in which you pack yourself away when the long day is done. A book neatly closed and placed snugly on a shelf. There's no place like home. An Englishman's home is his castle. Home is where the heart is.
This house says my name like an elegy
Oh my, oh my
Echoing where my ghosts all used to be
Oh my, oh my
there was a house in pennsylvania with a ghost in the walls
(an unloved house can be a certain kind of forever home)
And home is where that heart can be hurt most severely, because within that place of safety, the warm and welcoming embrace of the cramped and well-trod floors whose layout has ingrained itself into your soul, there you are most vulnerable. Your home is an extension of yourself, as much as you will let it be, and the place and the people and the things that form it and fill it are as much a part of you as your blood. As your bile. As your tears.
Home is- Home is where the fucking heart is, but someone ripped out mine.
You just wanted to prove there was one safe place, just one
safe place.
There is a place, deep in the heart of fear, where you trap yourself and claim that it is safety.
It was once a cabin and professes still to be such, but as with all in this new world that promises respite, it is a trap.
The land outside is warped and twisted by the touch of those things that feed on your suffering, and behind those rough, wooden planks it seems they cannot reach you. The screams may linger on the distant breeze, and your Eye may wander beyond the curtains from time to time, but you and the one you love are, it seems, safe.
That place is in my bones. That place is in my soul. I can't remember what it looked like.
Stay, the cabin says.
Stay within my false defences, cling so close to what you desperately wish to save, and live in shaking fear of the things beyond that may take it from you. Throw another log on the fire and curl up close. There are always more logs for the fire here. This is your home, and here you can be safe, as you putrefy, body and soul.
Won't you stay with me, my darling
When this house don't feel like home?
Home
MAG 169 - Fire Escape / "Curses" by The Crane Wives / "a haunting" by mag200 / MAG 169 - Fire Escape / my writing on 2 June 2023 / "You Are Jeff" by Richard Siken / MAG 162 - A Cosy Cabin / my writing on 25 June 2023 / MAG 162 - A Cosy Cabin / "Curses" by The Crane Wives
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