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timotheechlamett · 2 years

Note

i need good girl 3 immediately 😭 i’m so invested

GOOD GIRL PT. 3

PT. 1, PT. 2

ask and you shall receive my love 😌

WARNINGS: graphic smut, degradation if you squint, fluff, unprotected sex (use a fucking condom!!), soft dom!timothee

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"We can have fun here, right?"

The sentence nearly jumps out of my throat. We stare at each other again, his lips barely part. My pulse races a thousand miles an hour.

We've already been together, why am I nervous?

Why is he taking so long to respond?

Fuck, I should've just went to the party-

"Seems there's a lot of fun to be had here," He finally speaks. "between you and me, I didn't want to go to that party." His eyes flicker down to my lips and back up to my eyes.

"Why waste the time?" I take my bottom lip into my mouth.

Another beat of silence comes between our words before I reach over to grab the back of his neck, crashing my lips on his.

We both sigh into the kiss, which is neither rushed nor sloppy, it's passionate and hungry. He pulls me over to straddle his lap, bringing his hands to caress my face, his thumbs sit at my temples.

"You have..no..fucking idea," He says between kisses before pulling away and holding my face inches away from his own, "How long I've waited to have you again." He nearly growls before connecting his lips with mine again.

I moan into the now desperate kiss, sucking lightly on his bottom lip, gently letting my teeth graze it on the way out.

"Don't ever make me wait that long," I pull away, "Ever again." I kiss down the side of his neck, sucking on his Adam's apple, and repeating with the opposite side.

His hands roam my clothed body. He grips my ass before palming my breasts gently. I try to repress a whine before grabbing at the bottom of his shirt to remove it. He lifts his arms up allowing me to take it off. He reconnects our lips as I feel down his chest. He slides his hands under my shirt resting at my waist, silently asking permission. I take my shirt off, leaving my upper-half bare. I thank the heavens above I decided against a bra tonight.

He kisses a line from my neck, to my collars, to the middle of my chest, finally, sucking the supple flesh of my left breast while his right hand travels up my torso to roll my right nipple between his fingers.

"Tim," I catch myself not wanting to give him that power, taking my bottom lip hard between my teeth. He looks up through his lashes at me before pulling away. He replaces his mouth with his fingers, going back up the same trail with kisses.

"Let me hear you." He stares wantonly, "Let me what how good I make you feel." He brings his mouth back to my neck, sucking bruises on both sides.

"Fuck, why does it — Oh fuck — Why do you make me feel so good?" I finally moan out, grinding my hips down into his own, finally feeling the thing I had been missing so desperately.

"Y'make such pretty sounds for me." He leans back, drinking me in, "So fucking beautiful." He runs his thumbs over my hips.

I get up off his lap, dragging him to my bedroom, nearly throwing him on the bed and following him down.

I straddle his waist and unbutton his jeans, pulling them off with his help, taking in his impossibly hard dick, before undoing my own. He flips me onto my back and pulls mine clean off in one jerk, eliciting a moan from me.

I could feel the cold air of the room through my panties from the wetness.

"Aww poor baby," He hovers over me feeling the damp patch, "So needy, you want my cock that bad?" He teases.

"Please, please." I whine, attempting to kiss him again. He pulls back.

"Beg me more." He brings a hand up to grip my neck lightly, pinning me back while my hips desperately thrust upwards for contact.

"P-Please fuck me, need it s'bad." I slur.

He places a chaste kiss on my lips before ridding both of us of our remaining modesty. He runs a finger through my sopping folds, grazing my clit in the most delicious way. I can't help the moan that escapes my throat. He repeats the action, but this time dipping a finger into my already clenching opening, curling his finger up into me.

"Feels," I drawl out a breathy moan, 'Feels so good Timothée." I grip his bicep.

"Fuck, say my name again baby." He sucks another mark onto my chest.

"Tim- Timothée, need you." I cry out, feeling an uncontrollable lust for him inside me.

"Yeah?" He pulls his fingers out, lining himself up, "I'm here, you'll have me." He slowly pushes into me, stretching me out in the most delicious way.

All I can manage is a choked moan when I feel him part me, "O-Oh shit." I glide my nails down his back when he bottoms out, hitting my most sensitive spot.

"Fuck you're so tight." He whispers, pulling back out to the tip and slamming back in, moaning out as he does.

"It's t-too much, can't take i-it." I stutter, digging my nails deeper into his lower back. He sets a steady pace, repeating that same motion over and over.

My moans get stuck in my throat as he hit just the right spot repeatedly, I can hear my own wetness as he slides in and out. The knot in my stomach starts to form as he speeds up his thrusts.

"Such a good girl. Look how good you take me." He smooths the hair from my face, breathing hard, offering the occasional growl when my pussy tightens around his length.

He lifts my leg up over his shoulder, offering a deeper thrust. I nearly scream his name as I feel that coil tighten.

"Gonna cum, I'm gonna — Fuck — I'm gonna cum." It comes out as more of a desperate squeal than I hoped. He continues to pound into me, gradually gaining more speed.

"Let go," I close my eyes as I feel the pressure build, "Look at me, say my name, let me see you." He holds my head in place but keeps his pace.

I stare into his eyes as I come undone, "Timothee, oh my god," My eyes roll back, "Don't stop." I repeat, my hole throbbing and squeezing him as the string snaps within me. I was so dazed I didn't realize the wetness leaking from within me onto the sheets.

"Oh fuuuck." He moans and burrows his face in my neck, his length twitches as his thrusts get sloppier, "I'm gonna cum, fuck." He bites the side of my neck once more while he fills me with his warmth.

He pumps into me once, twice, three times, making his seed spill out from the edges of me and down the two sides of my lips.

He stills inside me, our heavy breaths the only audible sound in the room. He eventually pulls out. He uses his shirt to clean us both up before laying beside my nearly lifeless body.

He pulls me into his chest and draws light circles into my back as his heartbeat lulls me to into a daze.

"Next time, we're going on a real date." He softly kisses my temple. "And you will not escape it." He chuckles.

"It's a deal." I smile into his chest.

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everythingboutbooks · 9 months

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Call Me By Your Name - André Aciman

the reason why elio and oliver call each other by their own names:

the whole "call me by your name and i'll call you by mine" thing is something that i don't really see people discuss a lot online, which is pretty unfortunate because it holds great meaning.

i thought about this a lot, but wasn't really able to find an answer myself. while researching i came upon an explanation by alissa wilkinson published in an article in the vox (source: https://www.vox.com/platform/amp/2017/11/21/16552862/call-me-by-your-name-review-timothee-chalamet-armie-hammer).

before going into that we have to recall the importance of "old arts" for the story.

arts from ancient greece and rome, as well as old literature and music are frequent in the story. oliver is an archeologist, elio reads old books and transcribes music from composers like bach and listz. the tale of the knight and the princess with the iconic line "is it better to speak or to die?" is also fairly old.

calling each other by their own names is yet another reference to old art, this time specifically to greek mythology, as wilkinson explains.

she refers back to the myth of how zeus created people. here's a quick summary of that myth:

in the beginning zeus created people with four arms and four legs, as well as two faces. he feared that the humans might be too powerful, so he used lightning to split them all in half (hence why we only have two arms and legs and one face now). those 'half-people' were damned to search for their other missing half all their lives. without them, they felt lost, empty, hopeless. once they'd find each other, they'd feel whole again and would be able to live in love with each other forever.

in a way, this is the ancient greek concept of soulmates.

now, apply this concept to elio and oliver:

when elio meets oliver, he ultimately finds his other half. not just metaphorically, but literally. taking the greek myth into consideration, oliver would literally be the other half of elio that was split off him by zeus (and of course the other way around as well). when they come together again they become whole. in a way, elio becomes part of oliver and oliver becomes part of elio. they are themselves individually, but they are also each other.

in the book it is frequently more prominent how much elio wishes to become part of oliver, becoming one, even. it's not necessarily meant in relation to sex. so rather than becoming one through the closeness of sexual intimacy, elio primarily wishes to become one person with oliver. in relation to the myth, this describes elio's thrive to come together with his other half again.

in conclusion, aciman literally wrote elio and oliver to be soulmates, which may explain why aciman still, despite all the heartbreak and damage, chooses to give them a happy ending in the sequel novel Find Me.

i honestly find this reference extremely fascinating. being able to create reference like that gives the novel so much depth and meaning, and it also a highly valuable skill to be able to connect different devices this way. once again aciman proves how much of an incredibly writer he really is.

#call me by your name #cmbyn #book analysis #movie analysis #cmbyn analysis #elio perlman #oliver cmbyn #greek mythology #ancient origins #literature

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twopoppies · 2 years

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Harry being a Sex Icon is so ingrained into his image it makes people around him blind with it. They would’ve done so much better having him be besties with Flo and Gemma like Timothee Chalamet always is when they do movies together. It’s cute in group promo and makes it look like the movie was fun to film. But no, Harry Styles couldn’t keep it in his pants long enough to shoot a movie and it looks like it split the cast apart. Can’t wait for the tension on the red carpet. (I think it’s so ironic that them not-dating has caused more issues than if they actually had got together on set lmao, if it was real they’d have it all hushed up)

Hi love. Yeah, at first when we got the casting info I was so excited because everyone was in a long term relationship and I thought, “oh, he can just have a fun friendship with Flo! They’d be so funny together” etc etc

Then Dakota left. Then Holivia started. 😑😑😑😑

Harry/Flo friendship would have been great promo. But Olivia wants the spotlight. And it seems Harry’s team doesn’t think Harry can be anything but sex, sex, sex.

#holivia #stunts

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rawiswhore · 3 years

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Various Actors x Fem Reader- “In My House”

Imagine if 2020 was a year when we didn't have the Corona Virus and social distancing.

Because if it didn't have that virus, then this music video would be released...

You're a popular singer who released a new song and music video one day before Thanksgiving 2020.

This song was for the soundtrack for a movie set in the 1960′s, 1966 to be exact.

Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion's "WAP" is easily the biggest #1 song of 2020, but your new single and music video released one day before Thanksgiving might make people forget all about "WAP".

The video might go even more viral than "WAP", you'll find out why.

In the video, as the music starts to play, it starts off with you walking down a hallway dressed in a short, silky black bathrobe.

In the hallway, Timothee Chalamet is standing by one of the doors in the hallway, leaning his back on the wall, dressed in a silky suit and his hair flouncy, looking the way he looked when he appeared on Ellen DeGeneres' talk show at the end of 2017 with Armie Hammer.

This is your (or rather, my) favorite Timothee.

You slowly sauntered up to Timothee to the beat of your song, trying to look as sexy and seductive as possible to him.

The camera shot to Timothee, smirking at you trying to seduce him.

Before the words you sang in this song began, you stopped when you were standing right in front of Timothee, putting your hands on his face.

When the words to the song you sang began, you lipsynched to this song, your face so close to his.

Timothee arched his head back and closed his eyes while you were leaning your face and your body close to him.

Your lips were in front of his lips, your breath touching below his face.

Your lips were nudging into his lips while you lipsynched this song, your lips fumbling and muttering in between his lips.

Sometimes your lips buried and nudged into his slender neck, whereas his hands were on your bathrobe, looking like he wants to shed your bathrobe off.

One of your hands slid from his face to behind his head, where your fingers laced and buried themselves through his tousled hair.

You couldn't resist running your fingers through his hair.

Your other hand, however, was caressing up and down the bare part of his chest not covered by a dress shirt.

After the camera blurred out the image of you and Timothee making out, the camera then cut to Julian Sands looking the way he did in "Yeh Ballet" and "The Painted Bird", dressed in a long sleeve white button down shirt and slacks being held up by suspenders, one of his legs sprawled out across the couch while he holds a scotch glass.

Even though Julian is nowhere near as hot as he used to be, like in "Boxing Helena", "Husbands and Lovers", "Impromptu" and "Warlock II", he's still pretty sexy, especially when his hair is long.

Emilia Clarke is curled up right next to him, smiling and kissing him on the side of his neck and face, her hair her signature chestnut brown, whereas a blond Wendy James from Transvision Vamp circa 1989 is standing behind him and the couch, her arm running down his chest.

The camera then cut to you completely naked, sitting behind a chair with your legs wide open, albeit the chair was concealing and covering your nudity, not showing your breasts and vagina.

You were sitting in that chair Christine Keeler style, this image was meant to replicate that iconic image of Christine.

Sitting in front of you on the floor was Sebastian Stan, looking the way he did when he was interviewed sitting next to Sharon Stone, my favorite Sebastian.

He was smirking and smiling at you while you naughtily grinned at him, your elbows propped across the top of the chair.

When you started "singing" again, after the first 2 verses and sentences, you leaned down into your chair until you were lying on the floor and the chair fell down with it, your arms and elbows censoring your nipples from being shown, your hands on the carpeted floor.

You were lying on the floor in between Sebastian's legs and thighs, and not just that, but crawling behind you was Timothee Chalamet, who cupped and covered your breasts, his palms and hands concealing your nipples.

Tom Hiddleston was sitting on the floor next to the chair you previously were sitting in, Tom looked the way he did in "Return of Cranford".

You lifted one of your hands off of the carpet and placed it behind Sebastian's head, your fingers laced and buried through his hair, your eyes looking up at him.

You leaned your face close to Sebastian's face, your lips nudging into his lips, which then cut to you and Sebastian kissing each other, your eyes as well as his eyes closed.

The video then cut to Sebastian smothering his lips on your front neck, whereas Timothee was nudging his lips on the back of your neck, moving your hair behind your neck out of the way.

Tom crawled over to you and leaned himself into you, pressing and smothering his lips on the right side of your neck.

You were leaning your head back, resting it on Timothee's shoulder, as Sebastian was burying his face into your neck.

While this was going on, was sitting in a leather armchair, Michael Fassbender was watching what was going on with you, Seb, Timothee, and Tom, wanting to join in.

Michael looked the way he did in "Steve Jobs" when he had brown hair and wore that long sleeved white button down shirt.

As the instrumental music was playing, the video cut to various parts of the room, filming JJ Field with short hair while Ksenia Solo and Imogen Poots are surrounding him, trying to shed him out of his clothes.

Imogen and Ksenia have the ends of their hair swept up and have their hair in thick bangs, looking 1960's.

When the 3rd verse of the song began playing, you were lying on the carpet naked with your arms up, whereas Henry Cavill was hovering over you, straddling your lap, he was dressed in a white button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up to the elbows and a pair of slacks held up by suspenders.

His hair was cut short and he looked the way he did on Sherlock Holmes.

This isn't my favorite Henry, I prefer him as Geralt of Rivia, but this is meant to be a music video set in the 1960's, 1966 to be exact.

He was holding a 60's Polaroid camera in front of you, this moment was meant to be a recreation of an image from the 1960's of David Hemmings, a photographer, hovering over Verushka, a German supermodel in the 60's lying down.

When you laid naked on the floor, the camera filming this as well as Henry were trying to conceal and cover up your nudity, not show your bare naked breasts.

The camera then cut to you lying naked on the floor, although it filmed you from above your tits so your bare breasts won't be shown.

You actually put your index finger in your mouth in an attempt to look sexy.

You rose up from the carpeted floor, where Henry leaned himself back a bit.

When you rose up from the carpeted floor, you put your hands on both of his shoulders, your arms cleverly concealing his nudity.

You proceeded to sexily and slowly crawl closer to Henry, making him lounge on his elbows while he lays on the carpet and put the Polaroid camera down.

When Henry was lying on the carpet now, you were lying on top of him, his lips were smothering the side of your face.

Your hands were gripping and grasping onto his suit.

This moment where you lie on top of Henry while he kisses the side of your face was modeled after Madonna in the "Justify My Love" music video.

This music video and song was modeled after Madonna's "Justify My Love" song and music video, minus the crossdressing and lesbianism.

When the chorus played again, the video jumped to Wes Bentley sitting on a couch, you were straddling his lap completely naked, your breasts pressed against his chest to not show any nipples.

Plus, the video was filming you on your side so it won't show your buttcrack.

Wes looked the way he looked in "American Horror Story", minus having someone's face behind his head and top hat.

This is my personal favorite Wes.

His button down shirt was buttoned all the way down, your hands slid on his bare chest.

One of your hands slid from his chest to behind his head, where you let your fingers run through his hair.

Wes had one of his arms wrapped behind you, pulling you into him, where he buried his face into your neck, kissing your neck.

Your head leaned back and your face was in an orgasmic state.

Now you see why this video will blow up even more than "WAP" and make people forget about that song/video?

This video is every woman's sexual fantasy: it's got Tom Hiddleston, Sebastian Stan, Timothee Chalamet and Henry Cavill, men who've all blown up in popularity because of their looks and sex appeal and have fangirls obsessed with them.

Just look at how popular of a show "The Witcher" is.

Though, those fangirls will want to ring your neck and send you death threats after this video because they're jealous of you.

#timothee chalamet #sebastian stan #tom hiddleston #henry cavill #wes bentley #2020 #2020s #fanfiction

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ramajmedia · 5 years

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The Ellen DeGeneres Show: 10 Hilarious Guest Star Quotes That Are Too Funny For Words

The Ellen DeGeneres Show has been providing audiences with belly laughs, heartfelt moments, and amazing games for over 15 years. Through the years the one thing that remains is Ellen's ability to get guest stars to open up and share their not so glamorous moments. Sometimes celebrities end up sharing stories or cracking jokes that nobody sees coming, but are golden nonetheless. It's true that there is never a dull moment on Ellen's show. She is constantly pranking guests, getting them to reveal their juicy secrets, and just being plain hilarious. Here are 10 jokes from guest stars on The Ellen DeGeneres Show that are just too funny not to share.

RELATED: The Ellen DeGeneres Show: 10 Hidden Easter Eggs You Never Noticed

10 Taylor Swift's "Rebellious" Act

In a game of Burning Questions, Taylor Swift was asked what the most rebellious thing was she had done as a teenager. The pop sensation quipped by saying "Probably when I put Joe Jonas on blast on your show...that was too much." Ellen claimed she didn't even remember what Taylor was talking about. If you recall, Taylor went on The Ellen Show back in 2008 and talked about how some day she'd find love instead of a boy that breaks up with her over the phone (AKA Jonas). After ten years Swift decided maybe she should apologize for that. But getting the chance to call out your ex on national TV seems like something you can't really pass up on as a teenager.

9 Timothee Chalamet Locking His Mom Out

Ellen asked rising star Timothee Chalamet if he was a good kid and he was a little hesitant to say yes. Well we know why. Timothee then recalled a time in which he locked his mom out on a balcony of a cruise ship naked. He then proceeded to leave the room (to make the prank even better) except he forgot his key card. Oops. Ellen told him he has a lot of making up to do for that. Good thing he is a huge star now who can take his mom to every award show!

8 Ryan Reynolds And His Two Kids

While Ellen asked Ryan about what it's like traveling with his four year old daughter, she also stated that he had just had another child with wife Blake Lively. Ryan wittily replied "that happened from sex." The audience immediately erupted in a fit of laughter. Reynolds is not one to ever shy away from jokes, especially ones related to his marriage with Blake Lively. Ellen then perpetuated the joke by asking "so just sex those two times then?" He sarcastically replied with a "yeah just those two times."

RELATED: Ellen's 10 Most Iconic Halloween Costumes On The Ellen Show

7 Nicki Minaj's Explicit Lyrics

Nicki Minaj visited The Ellen Show back in 2012 to talk about her album Pink Friday: Roman Unloaded. Ellen asked her how she has been dealing with younger fans. Most of Nicki's lyrics can get pretty explicit but she still has a younger fan base that loves her music. Her response was perfect. Nicki said, "I find I don't really have to deal with it, I'm not their parent..." The crowd loved it, and honestly it is true. It isn't her job to monitor young ears.

6 John Krasinski's Shark Scare

In a 2016 interview with The Office star, John Krasinski, he tells Ellen of the time he went scuba diving with his wife Emily Blunt. They were 100 feet deep in the water, and scuba diving around sharks. Emily was already scared. One shark broke from the pack and began to charge at Emily. John then said he had two choices: "spook her and make her move which might make the shark bite her," "or just let it play out." He went for the latter.

5 Rihanna's Rider

When coming to a talk show or anywhere with a dressing room, celebrities have riders. Riders are basically a list of things that an artist would like to have in their room before they arrive. Ellen decided she would share Rihanna's Rider back in 2016. Her list included things like wine, hot Cheetos, regular Cheetos, and Oreos. She then admitted that it was a weird mix of things, but she liked to be prepared. The regular Cheetos are for when she "gets tired of the hot ones." And you never know when you'll be craving something.

4 Jim Parsons Bought His Sister A Car

At the beginning of Jim Parsons' fame on The Big Bang Theory, he stopped by The Ellen Show to talk about his new found success. He was happy to express that he was able to buy his sister a new car for Christmas. However, he said when he called to tell his mother what he was doing she responded by asking if "he would drive her to her brand new house in that car." Jim said that would just be silly spending.

RELATED: Ellen Show: 10 Most Memorable Celebrity Guest Appearances

3 Camila Cabello's Hand Warmers

While performing in Times Square on New Years Eve, Camila admitted that she was extremely cold. Camila is from Miami after all. She told Ellen that she stayed warm by placing hand warmers in between her layers of clothing. She even decided to put them well...down her pants. Her defense was "it really helped!"

2 Cardi B Trademarked Her Name

Ellen is no stranger to funny social media posts. She decided to put her face on a picture of rapper Cardi B, and call herself "Cardi E." Cardi told Ellen that she payed 2,000 dollars to trademark "Cardi." When Ellen asked her if she started any feud or if she could use the name Cardi E from now on, Cardi responded by asking Ellen if she was going to pay her 2,000 dollars then. Makes sense!

1 Will Smith Hates Mice

Movie star Will Smith might seem fearless to some. He too has his fair share of things that totally scare him. His biggest fear: mice. The pair previously discussed conquering fears like bungee jumping. Ellen decided to bring out a (fake) mouse so Will could overcome his fear. However he did not have the reaction she was hoping for. Will said, "everything is about to get ripped apart in this studio." I think mice is just one thing that Will is never going to be able to get over.

NEXT: 25 Wild Details About The Ellen DeGeneres Show

source https://screenrant.com/ellen-degeneres-show-10-hilarious-guest-star-quotes-funny-words/

#screenrant

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funface2 · 5 years

Text

The Ellen DeGeneres Show: 10 Hilarious Guest Star Quotes That Are Too Funny For Words – Screen Rant

The Ellen DeGeneres Show has been providing audiences with belly laughs, heartfelt moments, and amazing games for over 15 years. Through the years the one thing that remains is Ellen’s ability to get guest stars to open up and share their not so glamorous moments. Sometimes celebrities end up sharing stories or cracking jokes that nobody sees coming, but are golden nonetheless. It’s true that there is never a dull moment on Ellen’s show. She is constantly pranking guests, getting them to reveal their juicy secrets, and just being plain hilarious. Here are 10 jokes from guest stars on The Ellen DeGeneres Show that are just too funny not to share.

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RELATED: The Ellen DeGeneres Show: 10 Hidden Easter Eggs You Never Noticed

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10 Taylor Swift’s “Rebellious” Act

In a game of Burning Questions, Taylor Swift was asked what the most rebellious thing was she had done as a teenager. The pop sensation quipped by saying “Probably when I put Joe Jonas on blast on your show…that was too much.” Ellen claimed she didn’t even remember what Taylor was talking about. If you recall, Taylor went on The Ellen Show back in 2008 and talked about how some day she’d find love instead of a boy that breaks up with her over the phone (AKA Jonas). After ten years Swift decided maybe she should apologize for that. But getting the chance to call out your ex on national TV seems like something you can’t really pass up on as a teenager.

9 Timothee Chalamet Locking His Mom Out

8 Ryan Reynolds And His Two Kids

While Ellen asked Ryan about what it’s like traveling with his four year old daughter, she also stated that he had just had another child with wife Blake Lively. Ryan wittily replied “that happened from sex.” The audience immediately erupted in a fit of laughter. Reynolds is not one to ever shy away from jokes, especially ones related to his marriage with Blake Lively. Ellen then perpetuated the joke by asking “so just sex those two times then?” He sarcastically replied with a “yeah just those two times.”

RELATED: Ellen’s 10 Most Iconic Halloween Costumes On The Ellen Show

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7 Nicki Minaj’s Explicit Lyrics

Nicki Minaj visited The Ellen Show back in 2012 to talk about her album Pink Friday: Roman Unloaded. Ellen asked her how she has been dealing with younger fans. Most of Nicki’s lyrics can get pretty explicit but she still has a younger fan base that loves her music. Her response was perfect. Nicki said, “I find I don’t really have to deal with it, I’m not their parent…” The crowd loved it, and honestly it is true. It isn’t her job to monitor young ears.

advertising

6 John Krasinski’s Shark Scare

In a 2016 interview with The Office star, John Krasinski, he tells Ellen of the time he went scuba diving with his wife Emily Blunt. They were 100 feet deep in the water, and scuba diving around sharks. Emily was already scared. One shark broke from the pack and began to charge at Emily. John then said he had two choices: “spook her and make her move which might make the shark bite her,” “or just let it play out.” He went for the latter.

advertising

5 Rihanna’s Rider

When coming to a talk show or anywhere with a dressing room, celebrities have riders. Riders are basically a list of things that an artist would like to have in their room before they arrive. Ellen decided she would share Rihanna’s Rider back in 2016. Her list included things like wine, hot Cheetos, regular Cheetos, and Oreos. She then admitted that it was a weird mix of things, but she liked to be prepared. The regular Cheetos are for when she “gets tired of the hot ones.” And you never know when you’ll be craving something.

4 Jim Parsons Bought His Sister A Car

At the beginning of Jim Parsons’ fame on The Big Bang Theory, he stopped by The Ellen Show to talk about his new found success. He was happy to express that he was able to buy his sister a new car for Christmas. However, he said when he called to tell his mother what he was doing she responded by asking if “he would drive her to her brand new house in that car.” Jim said that would just be silly spending.

RELATED: Ellen Show: 10 Most Memorable Celebrity Guest Appearances

advertising

3 Camila Cabello’s Hand Warmers

While performing in Times Square on New Years Eve, Camila admitted that she was extremely cold. Camila is from Miami after all. She told Ellen that she stayed warm by placing hand warmers in between her layers of clothing. She even decided to put them well…down her pants. Her defense was “it really helped!”

advertising

2 Cardi B Trademarked Her Name

Ellen is no stranger to funny social media posts. She decided to put her face on a picture of rapper Cardi B, and call herself “Cardi E.” Cardi told Ellen that she payed 2,000 dollars to trademark “Cardi.” When Ellen asked her if she started any feud or if she could use the name Cardi E from now on, Cardi responded by asking Ellen if she was going to pay her 2,000 dollars then. Makes sense!

advertising

1 Will Smith Hates Mice

Movie star Will Smith might seem fearless to some. He too has his fair share of things that totally scare him. His biggest fear: mice. The pair previously discussed conquering fears like bungee jumping. Ellen decided to bring out a (fake) mouse so Will could overcome his fear. However he did not have the reaction she was hoping for. Will said, “everything is about to get ripped apart in this studio.” I think mice is just one thing that Will is never going to be able to get over.

NEXT: 25 Wild Details About The Ellen DeGeneres Show

Tags: ellen, will smith, cardi b

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timotheechlamett · 2 years

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GOOD GIRL PT. 2

PT. 1

WARNINGS: implied smut, insinuating to smut, fluff (kinda), awkward Timmy

—-———————————————

It's been over a two weeks since I had her.

My mind wanders to when I was running my fingers across her soft skin, capturing her eyes in mine, since I had her moaning and whimpering my name, begging for it.

There she was, sat across the room paying me no mind, like it never happened. It only took one time for me to crave her, and I was the one who started it.

Her head turns slightly as she holds my stare for a moment. She pulls her bottom lip between her teeth with a smirk. I look down at my desk withholding a smile.

I try to focus on our professor's lecture, only to have my thoughts run back to her.

The image of her soft, plump lips on mine sent electricity through my veins, how her mouth tasted on my tongue — I swear I could taste her strawberry chapstick on my tongue.

"That concludes today's lecture, please remember to read chapters four through six!" The professor belts out. I see her figure make its way toward the door.

I rush out of my seat jogging into the hallway trying to find her through the crowd. Finally spotting her, I reach out for her.

"Oh, Timmy-" She gives a small smile, turning to face me when I grab her wrist, “Hey are you busy tonight?" I interrupt, "No, not at all." She smirks.

“Well — Would you — Uh,”

Why the fuck am I lost for words now??

“Would you be interested in going to this party? With,” I clear my throat, “With me? Tonight? It starts at 10 but-” I run my thumb over the top of her wrist.

Smooth.

She cheekily friend before cutting in, “I might be interested.” She drops her gaze to my lips and backs up, “Maybe I should give you my number, you know? If I’m gonna go, you need it.” She drops her gaze to our connecting limbs briefly, so briefly I think it wasn’t real.

“No, of course, let me just,” I let go and shuffle through my backpack to get a piece of paper, dropping a folder in the process, I hand the ripped paper and pen to her.

What the fuck is wrong with you Timothée?

“Turn around real quick?” She more so tells me than asks. I oblige.

She writes down her name, number, and dorm room down on it, “I’ll let you know when I’m ready,” She hands it to me, “So you can walk with me there.” She takes a couple of steps past me and turns, “It’s the least you can do.” She smirks before turning around past the corner of the hall.

I have a fucking date. A date with Y/N. Holy shit.

——

I throw on a Gorillaz tee, some jeans, and converse, scrunch my hair a little, before spraying a couple spritzes of cologne before I wait for her beckoning call.

10 PM passes into 10:30.

10:40 PM and I finally get a text.

‘I’m ready (:’

I smile, locking my phone and heading to her dorm. I knock three times, shifting my weight on my feet.

“Hey,” She smiles as she opens the door. Her jeans hug her curves perfectly, the top she has on shows the top of her cleavage, her hair is pulled into a half up style.

“I figured we could pre-game before we set off.” She moves to the side, letting me in.

“That’s actually brilliant. I didn’t think of that.” I chuckle, stepping over her threshold, standing at the entrance as she closes the door.

“Make yourself at home! Dark or light?” She questions.

“I think dark tonight.” I make my way to the couch and rub my hands across my jeans after sitting.

“I’m game.” She calls from the kitchen.

Why am I nervous? We have literally already fucked.

Be your confident self, why are you nervous?

“Here we are.” She drags out the last word before sitting a mason jar shot glass in front of me, “Cheers!” We connect glasses before downing our respective liquor choices.

She puts us both another shot. We drink them, she repeats, I take in my surroundings.

Polaroids of her and her friends are strung up on the wall, various plants are scattered around, an impressive candle collection is lined up on the entertainment station, and it smells like vanilla and raspberry.

We take our third shot. I check the time, ‘11:11'

“Oh make a wish!” I shake her leg, “It’s 11:11.” She closes her eyes, I follow.

I open mine before her and drink her in. I can tell she put effort into her appearance, even though it’s unnecessary. She looks absolutely ethereal. She always looks ethereal.

She opens her eyes and I can’t help but smile, “That was a long wish.” I tease.

“I had to make it count.” She smiles back.

That damn smile.

“You ready to get going?” I stand.

“Wait, there’s a real party?”

I look down at her with a confused face. “Well, yeah, I hope it’s a real party. I would be disappointed.”

“Oh — I, I thought,” She gets quiet, “I thought it was an excuse just to have sex.” She looks up at me.

I’m lost for words, “I just thought that you didn’t wanna just say it,” She looks down again, her leg starts bouncing, “I’m sorry did I just make this awkward, I just made it— “

“Y/n.”

Her eyes bore into mine. “I didn’t ask you on a fake date. I certainly didn’t expect anything from you after the real one.” I sit next to her, “There’s really a party and I actually want to take you.” I place my hand on her leg once more.

There’s only silence as we stare each other down. My thoughts run wild.

She thinks I’m a complete prick.

Why did I let my hormones take over me?

Jesus, I made a dick move.

Why is she so quiet? She’s been quiet for a long time-

“We can always just go to the next one,” Her hand overlaps mine, I hold my breath“There’s gonna bee plenty of parties,” She looks to my lips back to my eyes, “Plus, I think we could have a better time.” She moves from my hand to my upper thigh.

No fucking way.

“We can have fun together here, right?” She whispers.

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lodelss · 5 years

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Soraya Roberts | Longreads | November 2018 | 10 minutes (2,422 words)

Should I be married to a woman? If today were yesterday, if all this sexual fluidity were in the discourse when I was coming of age in the ‘90s, would I have been with a woman instead of a man? It is a question that “The Bisexual” creator Desiree Akhavan also poses in the second episode of her Hulu series, co-produced with Channel 4 because no U.S. network wanted it. Akhavan directed, co-wrote, and stars in the show in which her character, Leila, splits with her girlfriend of 10 years, Sadie (Maxine Peake), and starts having sex with men for the first time. So, Leila asks, if the opposite had happened to her — as it did to me — and a guy had swept her off her feet instead of a woman, would things have turned out differently? “Maybe I would’ve gone the path of least resistance,” Leila says. Maybe I did.

This is a conundrum that marks a previous generation — one that had to “fight for it,” as Akhavan’s heroine puts it, and is all the more self-conscious for being juxtaposed with the next one, the one populated by the fluid youth of social media idolizing the likes of pansexual Janelle Monáe, polyamorous Ezra Miller, undecided Lucas Hedges. Call it a queer generation gap (what’s one more label?). “I don’t know what it’s like to grow up with the Internet,” 32-year-old Akhavan explains to a younger self-described “queer woman” in her show. “I just get the sense that it’s changing your relationship to gender and to sexuality in a really good way, but in a way I can’t relate to.”

***

This Playboy bunny is chest out, lips open, legs wide. This Playboy bunny is every other Playboy bunny except for the flat hairy chest because this Playboy bunny is Ezra Miller. The star of Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald calls himself “queer” but it’s hard to take him seriously. What was it Susan Sontag said: it’s not camp if it’s trying to be camp? And for the past few months, while promoting the Potterverse prequel no one asked for, this 26-year-old fashionisto has been trying his damndest, styling himself as a sort of latter day Ziggy Stardust — the monastic Moncler puffer cape, the glittering Givenchy feathers — minus the depth. Six months ago, Miller looked like every other guy on the red carpet and now, per his own request, models bunny ears, fishnets, and heels as a gender-fluid rabbit for a randy Playboy interview. Okay, I guess, but it reads disingenuous to someone who grew up surrounded by closets to see them plundered so flagrantly for publicity. Described as “attracted to men and women,” Miller is nevertheless quoted mostly on the subject of guys, the ones he jerked off and fell in love with. He claims his lack of romantic success has lead him to be a polycule: a “polyamorous molecule” involving multiple “queer beings who understand me as a queer being.”

The article hit two weeks after i-D published a feature in which heartthrob Harry Styles interviewed heartthrob Timothée Chalamet with — despite their supposed reframing of masculinity — the upshot, as always, being female genuflection. “I want to say you can be whatever you want to be,” Chalamet explains, styled as a sensitive greaser for the cover. “There isn’t a specific notion, or jean size, or muscle shirt, or affectation, or eyebrow raise, or dissolution, or drug use that you have to take part in to be masculine.” Styles, on brand, pushes it further. “I think there’s so much masculinity in being vulnerable and allowing yourself to be feminine,” the 24-year-old musician says, “and I’m very comfortable with that.” (Of course you are comfortable, white guy…did I say that out loud?) As part of the boy band One Direction, Styles was marketed as a female fantasy and became a kind of latter-day Mick Jagger, the playboy who gets all the girls. His subsequent refusal to label himself, the rumors about his close relationship with band mate Louis Tomlinson, and the elevation of his song “Medicine” to “bisexual anthem”– “The boys and the girls are in/I mess around with them/And I’m OK with it” — all build on a solid foundation of cis white male heterosexuality.

Timothée Chalamet’s sexuality, meanwhile, flows freely between fiction and fact. While the 22-year-old actor is “straight-identifying,” he acquires a queer veneer by virtue of his signature role as Call Me by Your Name’s Elio, a bisexual teen (or, at least, a boy who has had sex with both women and men). Yet off screen, as Timothée, he embodies a robust heterosexuality. On social media, the thirst for him skews overwhelmingly female, while reports about his romantic partners — Madonna’s daughter, Johnny Depp’s daughter — not only paint him straight but enviably so. Lucas Hedges, another straight-identified actor who plays gay in the conversion therapy drama Boy Erased, somewhat disrupts this narrative, returning fluidity to the ambiguous space it came from. The 21-year-old admitted in an interview with Vulture that he found it difficult to pin himself down, having been “infatuated with” close male friends but more often women. “I recognize myself as existing on that spectrum,” he says. “Not totally straight, but also not gay and not necessarily bisexual.” That he felt “ashamed” for not being binary despite having a sixth-grade health teacher who introduced him to the range of sexuality suggests how married our culture is to it.

As a woman familiar with the shame associated with female sexuality, it’s difficult to ignore the difference in tenor of the response to famous young white males like Miller, Styles, and Chalamet and famous black women like Janelle Monáe and Tessa Thompson not only discussing it, but making even more radical statements. Appearing on the cover of Rolling Stone in May, Monáe said straight up (so to speak): “Being a queer black woman in America — someone who has been in relationships with both men and women — I consider myself to be a free-ass motherfucker.” The same age as Desiree Akhavan, 32, Monáe identified as bisexual until she read about pansexuality. She initially came out through her music; her album, Dirty Computer, contains a song called “Q.U.E.E.N.” which was originally titled “Q.U.E.E.R.,” while the music video accompanying “Pynk” has actress Tessa Thompson emerging from Monáe’s Georgia O’Keeffe-esque pants. While neither one of them has discussed their relationship in detail, Thompson, who in Porter magazine’s July issue revealed she is attracted to men and women, said, “If people want to speculate about what we are, that’s okay.”

The mainstream press and what appeared to be a number of non-queer social media acolytes credited Chalamet and Styles with redefining their gender and trouncing toxic masculinity. “[H]arry styles, ezra miller, and timothee chalamet are going to save the world,” tweeted one woman, while The Guardian dubbed Miller the “hero we need right now.” Monáe, meanwhile, was predominantly championed by queer fans (“can we please talk about how our absolute monarch Janelle Monáe has been telegraphing her truth to the queers thru her art and fashion for YEARS and now this Rolling Stone interview is a delicious cherry on top + a ‘told u so’ to all the h*teros”) and eclipsed by questions about what pansexual actually means. While white male fluidity was held up as heroic, female fluidity, particularly black female fluidity, was somehow unremarkable. Why? Part of the answer was recently, eloquently, provided by “Younger” star Nico Tortorella, who identifies as gender-fluid, bisexual, and polyamorous. “I get to share my story,” he told The Daily Beast. “That’s a privilege that I have because of what I look like, the color of my skin, what I have between my legs, my straight passing-ness, everything.”

***

When I was growing up sex was not fun, it was fraught. Sex was AIDS, disease, death. The Supreme Court of Canada protected sexual orientation under the Charter when I was 15 but I went to school in Alberta, Canada’s version of Texas — my gym teacher was the face of Alberta beef. In my high school, no one was gay even if they were. All gender was binary. Sex was a penis in a vagina. Popular culture was as straight, and even Prince and David Bowie seemed to use their glam sparkle to sleep with more women rather than fewer. Bisexual women on film were murderers (Basic Instinct) or sluts (Chasing Amy) and in the end were united by their desire for “some serious deep dicking.” I saw no bisexual women on television (I didn’t watch “Buffy”) and LGBTQ characters were limited (“My So-Called Life”). Alanis Morissette was considered pop music’s feminist icon, but even she was singing about Dave Coulier. And the female celebrities who seemed to swing both ways — Madonna, Drew Barrymore, Bijou Phillips — were the kind who were already acting out, their sexuality a hallmark of their lack of control.

“I think unrealistic depictions of sex and relationships are harmful,” Akhavan told The New York Times. “I was raised on them and the first time I had sex, I had learned everything from film and television and I was like ‘Oh, this isn’t at all like I saw on the screen.’” Bisexuality has historically been passed over on screen for a more accessible binary depiction of relationships. In her 2013 book The B Word: Bisexuality in Contemporary Film and Television, Maria San Filippo describes what has become known as “bisexual erasure” in pop culture: “Outside of the erotically transgressive realms of art cinema and pornography, screen as well as ‘real life’ bisexuality is effaced not only by what I’ve named compulsory monosexuality but also by compulsory monogamy,” she writes, adding, “the assumption remains that the gender of one’s current object choice indicates one’s sexuality.” So even high-profile films that include leads having sex with both genders — Brokeback Mountain, The Kids Are All Right, Blue Is the Warmest Color, Carol, Call Me By Your Name — are coded “gay” rather than “bi.”

Despite the rise in bisexual women on the small screen like Annalise in “How to Get Away with Murder,” Syd in “Transparent,” and Ilana in “Broad City,” GLAAD’s latest report on inclusion cited continued underrepresentation. While 28 percent of LGBTQ characters on television are bisexual, the majority are women (75 versus 18) and they are often associated with harmful tropes — sex is used to move the plot forward and the characters scan amoral and manipulative. This despite an increase in the U.S.’s queer population to 4.5 percent in 2017 from 3.5 percent in 2012 (when Gallup started tracking it). A notable detail is the extreme generational divide in identification: “The percentage of millennials who identify as LGBT expanded from 7.3% to 8.1% from 2016 to 2017, and is up from 5.8% in 2012,” reported Gallup. “By contrast, the LGBT percentage in Generation X (those born from 1965 to 1979) was up only .2% from 2016 to 2017.”

Here’s the embarrassing part. While I am technically a millennial, I align more with Generation X (that’s not the embarrassing bit). I am attracted more to men, but I am attracted to women as well yet don’t identify as LGBTQ. How best to describe this? I remember a relative being relieved when I acquired my first boyfriend (it was late). “Oh good, I thought you were gay,” they said. I was angry at them for suggesting that being gay was a bad thing, but also relieved that I had dodged a bullet. This isn’t exactly the internalized homophobia that Hannah Gadsby talked about, but it isn’t exactly not. My parents and my brother would have been fine with me being gay. So what’s the problem? The problem is that the standard I grew up with — in the culture, in the world around me — was not homosexuality, it was heterosexuality. I don’t judge non-heterosexual relationships, but having one myself somehow falls short of ideal. For the same reason, I can’t shake the false belief that lesbian sex is less legitimate than gay sex between men. The ideal is penetration. “That’s some Chasing Amy shit,” my boyfriend, eight years younger, said. And, yeah, unfortunately, it is. I have company though.

In a survey released in June, billed as “the most comprehensive of its kind,” Whitman Insight Strategies and BuzzFeed News polled 880 LGBTQ Americans, almost half of whom were between the ages of 18 and 29, and found that the majority, 46 percent, identified as bisexual. While women self-described as bi four times as often as men (79 to 19 percent), the report did not offer a single clear reason for the discrepancy. It did, however, suggest “phallocentrism,” the notion that the penis is the organizing principle for the world, the standard. In other words, sex is a penis in a vagina. “While bisexual women are often stereotyped as sleeping with women for male attention, or just going through a phase en route to permanent heterosexuality,” the report reads, “the opposite is presumed of bisexual men: that they are simply confused or semi-closeted gay men.” This explains why women who come out, like Monáe and Thompson, are considered less iconoclastic in the popular culture than men who even just make vague gestures towards fluidity — the stakes are considered higher for the guys. In truth, few feel comfortable being bi. Though the Pew Research Center’s survey of queer Americans in 2013 revealed that 40 percent of respondents identified as bisexual, this population was less likely to come out and more likely to be with a partner of the opposite sex. Famous women like Maria Bello, Cynthia Nixon, and Kristen Stewart have all come out, yet none of them really use the label.

“Not feeling gay enough, that’s something I felt a lot of guilt over,” Akhavan told the Times. It is guilt like this and the aforementioned shame which makes it all the more frustrating to watch the ease with which the younger generation publicly owns their fluidity. It is doubly hard to watch young white men being praised for wearing bunny ears in a magazine that has so long objectified women, simply because the expectations are so much lower for them. “I’m not looking down on the younger experience of being queer,” Akhavan said, “but I do think that there’s a resentment there that we gloss over.” In response, many of us react conservatively, with the feeling that they haven’t worked for it, that it is somehow less earned because of that. This is an acknowledgment of that resentment, of the eye rolling and the snickering with which we respond to the youth (ah, youth!). In the end we are not judging you for being empowered. We are judging ourselves for not being empowered enough.

* * *

Soraya Roberts is a culture columnist at Longreads.

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timotheechlamett · 2 years

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ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME TIMOTHÉE!!!!!!!

OSCARS DRIP IS IMPECCABLE. THE RINGS!! THE SHIRTLESS DEBUT!!!!!

#timothee chalamet #timothée chalamet #lil timmy tim #timmy chalamet #timothee #timothée #chalamet #Oscars 2022 #94th academy awards #elio cmbyn #elio x oliver #elio perlman #paul atreides #timothee chalamet being a sex icon #timothee chalamet being absolutely stunning

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lodelss · 5 years

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The Queer Generation Gap

Soraya Roberts | Longreads | November 2018 | 10 minutes (2,422 words)

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* * *

Soraya Roberts is a culture columnist at Longreads.

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