#the burnout will get to me eventually if the hyperfixation doesn't get to me first | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

trashquisitor-shirozora · 3 months

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Was browsing through early BOBF/Mando S3 criticisms on Tumblr and WOW, 93% of S2’s viewership dropped when S3 finished airing for an extremely understandable reason. As someone who got into Dinluke after all the dust settled I can only imagine what it was like becoming invested in Din’s story and being floored by the S2 finale only for it to get totally swerve-balled after a long-anticipated wait. How did you avoid the disappointment and burnout?

Spite is an incredibly powerful motivator, let me tell you.

I'm halfway joking about that, btw. I could say I'm used to disappointment and I also worked really hard not to take things too personally after being disappointed time and again year after year by fandoms I was in. Imo the healthiest attitude is that no show/movie/book/videogames/etc will ever play out the way you want/think it should so take what you can get and trash the rest. By the time I started watching The Mandalorian, I'd been burnt badly by Star Trek AOS, the Sequel Trilogy, the MCU, and the Disney machine, and I had to figure out how to accept that I like what I like, I can't change what I can't change, and I can/will run the fuck off with what I can change, which is making wildly fun and fulfilling transformative shit like fanfics and fanart.

I was actually excited about TBOBF and was utterly betrayed by the executive decision to throw him and Fennec to the side in order to absolutely trash the Season 2 finale of the Mando Show by having Din and Grogu reunite just like that. I guess I got lucky in that I had a long-running fic series that I was heavily invested in and I was not about to let Disney stop me from finishing it. Instead of letting my frustrations kill my interest in the show and fandom, I turned it into motivation to keep telling the story I wanted to tell based on the fallout of Season 2. It also helped that Andor happened.

I quit Season 3 of the Mando Show after the 1st episode and it was the best decision I ever made. I had a really rough time with it and was encouraged to step away if it was giving me too much stress. I'm glad for that. Less time and energy picking about Filoni&Favreau and Disney Lucasfilm's decisions and disappointments, more time and energy spent writing and drawing the dinluke I want to see. The nice thing about Star Wars is that it is an old and vast sandbox. Plenty of room here to build whatever sandcastles and dig however many holes you want while canon goes floundering by.

I think also that it really helped to find spaces to share with people who vibe on the same wavelength, so I'm not alone to my thoughts and spiraling myself out of a fandom I enjoyed (like what happened with TLJ but I shan't go there bc this response is long enough). Those posts about having friends you can shit-talk things with? Valid af. You need outlets to vent your grievances without setting bridges on fire, and it'll help your enjoyment of things in the long run.

I didn't avoid the disappointment but I figured out how to make something of it, so I'm still writing dinluke, I'm still drawing dinluke, I'm still getting giddy over dinluke. I actively choose to do what I want with them, and nothing Disney Lucasfilm puts out is ever going to stop me.

#shirozora awkwardly responds to asks #dinluke #the mandalorian #star wars #tbobf #fandom things #realized I still have a lot of thoughts about TBOBF and Mando S3 while answering the ask #i should post them at some point #but really I can be a really spiteful person who uses rage to fuel certain ideas #if i see a story I don't like for a thing that I like I will rewrite things and I will create things to get over that rage #it's like that quote in frankenstein #it's like. i like this thing so much and i expect better from it so if it won't reach there then i'll write/draw it myself #the burnout will get to me eventually if the hyperfixation doesn't get to me first #but for now i am really enjoying the ride and i remain heavily invested in the story i'm telling with Dangerous Dreams #sometimes you just gotta find the one thing in the fandom you really like and stick with it to the end of the line

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wetcatspellcaster · 1 month

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hello! i have a question about finding time to write because i have an idea for an astarion fic but it's my first year in my ph.d. program and i am DROWNING IN WORK AND READINGS. how did you do this AND work on your dissertation? (also congrats on that!!! that's massive!!!)

hello, anon, congratulations to YOU on your phd programme!! many felicitations on the continuing of your education.

I took a while to reply to this, bc I'm not sure if I'm the best person to ask this question. my personal answer is 'hyperfixate on the dopamine source so, so hard until you burnout, and then feel guilty bc you haven't updated in ages (I'm currently one week since an update), and then let that guilt become your new motivator! :D'

...which doesn't seem very healthy. and definitely impacts my ability to answer the question in a way that is actually helpful.

so i don't have an answer, but my honest pieces of advice are below the cut.

idk what kinda PhD you are doing, but if it's a humanities, in my experience, there are dips and lulls. first year is always a bit hectic bc the imposter syndrome is high and you feel like you're treading water to stay afloat. but things will get so much easier, and will in fact go through peaks and troughs! in 2nd and 3rd year, i had months without any work at all. wait for a trough to do some drafting. if you're currently really struggling, then just sketch as detailed an outline as you can in a document when the idea is fresh, and then you can return to it in dribs and drabs when you have a spare moment. [if you're a scientist, apologies in advance, you have a much harder life than me!] .

this one isn't very burnout friendly, but i am introverted and treat writing fic like a hobby for when i have no social battery. then my fic battery runs out, i go be social. yes, this kinda just spreads the burnout around. yes, i also know writing is still work! but it doesn't feel like it, to me. so I guess make your fic idea as much about fun, and as least about work, as possible. make it into the catnip that will make you come back to it. treat it as an escape rather than another magnum opus, or god forbid, a second dissertation. .

this also applies to PhD work - again, if you are a humanities student, you'll inevitably hit a writing block in your thesis. these are normal, and though they feel like the worst thing at the time, they will inevitably shift. thesis writing block when i was often very productive with fic, bc my thesis wasn't taking up my brain power and/or taking time away from my thesis was exactly what i needed. If you're burned out on the thesis, maybe spend some time just playing around in your brain for a bit. my friend told me about how she used fic as a way to build 'mastery' - when she was depressed or feeling down about her thesis, she would do something she knew she was good at (fic), and this would lift her mood. in the self critical world of academia, sometimes a little fic positivity goes a long way (at least for me, but that's bc both my supervisors are very very harsh, the exact opposite of the AO3 comment box). .

find an update schedule that works for you. i used to write a whole fic before i published any of it, but that's become more untenable as my wordcounts get bigger and i need motivation. now, comments fuel me when i'm drafting. so honestly, if you think posting will add pressure, don't post. write it just for you. if you think posting is the only thing that will keep the idea alive, do it and then don't feel guilt if there's a large gap in updates. people will still read it when it eventually goes up! :)

Honestly, I don't really have an answer. I wrote a lot these last few months bc I was feeling very depressed with the endgame of my thesis, and writing distracted me and made me feel better. I try to keep two nights a week free for fic, but that works for me bc I'm an introvert who lives alone. I don't think you can force it, but what I can tell you is that the PhD does get much, much easier (and that first year is also a perfectly legit time to faff around a bit and commit some time theft if you want - at least in the humanities, bc you'll still have so much time in your project).

I'm sorry I don't have a clear answer! Fic is important to me, so I make time for it, sometimes to my own detriment. If your PhD is what is important to you rn, fic can wait! Similarly, if you want to take some time away from that treading water, maybe microdose an hour or so of fic to start building mastery :) xx

#asks #anons #academia tag #good luck with both your thesis and your fic idea anon!!

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vlueyellow · 3 years

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ADHD Bitty headcanons

Now, i might be projecting but I've always seen a lot of myself in Eric, which is why one of my favorite omgcp headcanons is ADHD!Bitty.

So, here they are

Please add to them if you have some as well!

Eric got diagnosed fairly early, but still late enough that his early school years sucked

And even when he did get diagnosed his teachers either didn't care or had no idea of how to help him

And trying meds only led to really bad side effects so he quickly stopped

Safe to say he struggled a bit (and the bullying didn't help that issue either, together with the whole internalized homophobia thing and good lord, someone get this boy to therapy-)

However, as he got older he kept researching and eventually figured out where he struggled and how he could help himself deal

This is also how he got into vlogging because he saw this one youtuber with ADHD who helped him a bunch but that's a different story

Now to his ADHD

Eric has the more discreet kind of ADHD which means he's constantly in fear of people think he's faking it and doing things for attention because he passes as neurotypical most of the time

This also results in a lot of masking, to the point of where he doesn't even know he's doing it or how to stop it.

(Shitty helps him a lot with this by studying with him in either of their rooms and letting him experiment with unmasking and what unmasking actually looks like for Eric.)

(its a fun journey and he discovers that he actually stims quite a lot)

Eric is also one of those nd people who actually thrive listening to loud music

It helps him focus and he can't study without it

It also allows him to take a break from stimming which helps with doing assignment because more often than not his stims involve his hands (and you can't really write an assignment when you keep snapping your fingers and rotating your wrists in all possible directions)

Speaking of assignments

Executive dysfunction

There it is

The Big Bad gateway to self hatred and bad work ethics

Finishing assignments actually became such a struggle after his freshmen year that Eric decided to try meds again

Luckily for him, this time the side effects were much milder and they actually worked quite well for him

(The first day he took Adderal Ransom and Holster walked in on him crying while cleaning his room. It wasn't sad crying. It was oh-my-god-I-finished-my-assignment-baked-three-pies-AND-I-am-now-cleaning-my-room-I-have-never-been-this-productive-in-my-life-someone-hug-me type of crying)

Of course, the meds don't solve his problems, but they do help his overall regulation of his emotions and, for the most part, helps him keep deadlines

Now, he's still a very emotional person but at least now he doesn't have a burnout once every week

And his Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria is still thriving as always

(his first year was really tough because of this. Jack meant well but it was a lot for Eric)

His hyperfixations include baking (obviously), Beyonce (also obviously), figure skating (he still keeps up with his favorites) and, funnily enough, history (His thesis was picked very carefully)

As mentioned before, Eric enjoys loud music and he's fairly okay with sounds (he thrives in the locker room and on the ice, as well as in the Haus where its never quiet), but textures both in food and fabrics are a Big Deal to him

Velvet blankets? Get that cursed witchcraft away from him

Mushrooms? He can and will spit them out

Chalk? Absolutely the fuck not

However, he's weirdly okay with touching styrofoam? And doesn't hate the sound of it rubbing together?

He likes it a lot when Chowder comes around

Chowder, his sweet handsome son, has absolutely raging ADHD, to the point where taking his daily meds is absolutely essential

Eric doesn't really have that problem, he can skip a day or two and still be fairly functioning

Chowder however-

Lets just say that him moving into the Haus was a very good thing because of supervision and people reminding him to take his meds

They bond a lot over their shared struggles, and Eric helps Chowder navigate school and hockey at the same time

This is getting off track, I can talk about ADHD!Chowder all day long

anyway

Shitty was the first person Eric told

The next day Shitty got him a stim toy and a t-shirt that had a picture of Raven from that's so Raven and text at the bottom that said "that's so ADHD"

Eric still wears it to sleep

The rest of the team reacted exactly the way Shitty told him they would, totally accepting

A few days after he told them Shitty came into his room with Jack in tow and smiled so wide while Jack said he was autistic himself so if Eric needed it he could borrow Jack's weighted blanket

After that day their relationship started to look like a friendship

And later when they finally began dating Eric got really good at revising his recipes while lying on top of Jack when he was having sensory overload, and Jack got really good at letting Eric stim with his fingers when he forgot his fidget cube

Okay I'm gonna stop

But I might add to it later

Please add something yourself if you want to!

Thanks for reading!

#omgcp #omgcp au #omgcp headcanon #check please headcanon #check please au #eric bittle #jack zimmermann #shitty knight #chowder #zimbits #adhd headcanon #adhd bitty #check please #headcanon #omgcp fic #check please fanfiction #my posts #my writing

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