So a thing that always bothers me when I see people on Tumblr mention CBT - Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, for all you fellow perverts out there - is that if you were told that CBT is about “thinking will make your problem go away” then you either had a shitty therapist (which is entirely likely) or you weren’t listening closely enough (which is also likely for all of us with different flavors of neurodivergence). 

I say this as someone who did CBT to only middling success - it wasn’t a cure-all, but it DID give me some tools that help in very specific aspects of my life. No, stopping and naming my sudden burst of rage or sadness or hopelessness as PMDD or a depressive episode does not make that burst go away. But after doing it for a while, it makes it easier to DEAL with that burst. Reminding myself of that makes it easier to not take it out on someone else, to successfully tell myself “this isn’t someone else’s problem, it will pass soon, it always does, being an asshole about it only makes it worse.” I still feel absolutely shitty, but thanks to that self-training I feel less shitty on the back end than I otherwise would.

When my brain tells me I’m worthless, CBT taught me to immediately follow up by asking “would anyone I care about say that about me?” Does it mean the worthlessness completely disappears? No, but it can function like a rope tying me to reality so I can ride the shitty terrible thoughts out to the other side without doing anything stupid. Sometimes the rope is sturdy. Sometimes it’s embroidery floss. But any tether is better than none at all. 

Does it always work? No. But it works often enough that learning some CBT methods was worth it for me. Knowing what the problem is doesn’t negate the problem. It just reminds me that controlling how I behave when it occurs will make life better for me in the long run. I still need the drugs. I still have other coping mechanisms. That’s just one of them. 

That’s why Behavioral is in the title. CBT isn’t for everyone, and it’s not going to work on every issue. But it can be useful tool in your “deal with my mental illness and/or neurodivergence” toolbox. It’s not a scam. It’s not just pseudo-science bullshit. It’s just training yourself to remember that even if you can’t control the pain, you can control how you react to it, and that control can be a gift to yourself. 

Quackity: These past days I've been in many calls, and I'm not done yet. I've spoken to a lot of people and creators. I've read your comments and I'm well aware of what needs to be done to carry out this project. I want to tell you all, beforehand, that for me the team's well-being is fundamental. I'm very involved in this topic to sort it out and I want to make that very clear. I want to tell you something... I want to tell you all that the administrative staff responsible for so much harm to the project has been fired. Specifically, those who made decisions without my permission, affecting the administrative and financial area of the project. Consequently, after this, I was in charge of doing a financial analysis that's carrying out for the QSMP.

Guys, to be really honest, it was not going to last. Therefore, I've had to make deep drastic structural changes that have lead me to reduce the performance of the server down to the most essential, and this is in order to ensure the well being of everyone involved in it. Having said this, I want to give a very important update: I want to let you all know that the QSMP will have to slow down temporarily. This is to ensure this new structure adapts to the project, because it's a restructuring that's taking place. I'm letting you know, and I reiterate, there are no voluntary positions inside the QSMP.

At the moment, there will not be any more individual update accounts of all 5 existing languages in the project. In any case, during this transition, there's going to be a temporal absence of all Eggs and NPCs. I know these are difficult changes, and I repeat, it's temporary until we adjust to these new conditions that will improve the performance of this new structure that's being made from scratch, both in the administrative and financial part. I'd like to reintegrate people fro the QSMP as time goes by if a financial viability can be found for the project Taking advantage of this update to tell you guys that within the changes of the server as it is, creators will have full control of their lore and stories. The team will not intervene in the way that it was being done. Moreover, efforts will be made to change the competitive dynamics inside the game so as to ease up the game style for the creators. Like I'm saying, all of these changes, and more, are being carrying out to have the project as best as possible, and they're being done little by little. This is a whole new structure that will ensure the best continuity and experience for the creators, the community and the team behind.

Guys, I want to make very clear that this is restructuring process, and again, it's not a fast one. The server being open does not mean everything's perfect, I understand that very well. Conversations will keep taking place, communication will continue and the constant improvement of the project as well. I ask, please, for everyone's patience and understanding regarding all changes. Please do wait for official announcements since a lot of incomplete and incorrect information is being spread. I want to tell you all something- if you don't trust in these changes or have many doubts about it, and don't want to consume any more of the project's content, I understand 100%. I have a personal commitment with the QSMP and I will work until it functions in the way it is supposed to do.

Lastly, I want to let you know that it was being worked on for months on finalizing the integration of Korean creators to the QSMP. For that reason, tomorrow we will be welcoming the new Korean creators of the QSMP, of course, taking into account all the changes I've just mentioned. I hope you can give the new Korean members warm welcome to the project. And as you know, their schedules are earlier. For everyone who would like to watch, they will be joining at 11am Mexico time and at 9am US time. Basically, I wanted to give that update regarding everything that's being done within the project. Again, thank you for your patience and understanding- these are necessary changes and I'm glad they're being done now. And many more things will keep being adjusted.

via @QuackitySubs

I'm sorry I let down my guard.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

I know the respective fandoms of DC and Miraculous Ladybug have a certain disdain for MLxDC fics but I think there's a potential for fics where Luka leaves Paris and just keeps traveling to different US cities because he keeps figuring out secret identities and he's just this 15 year old kid growing increasingly frustrated and exasperated at how badly everyone hides their identities and he just has to pretend to be oblivious even tho it's Their Fault for being Bad At Secrets and shouldn't adults be better at this??????

Come on, he is wearing gaiters I couldn't resist + End of the Line speeding bullet

the thing is, for MCR death was always an external force. like, Helena, It's Not A Fashion Statement, even Famous Last Words, etc it's all like, death is this future, potential thing they're fighting back against. (side note: this is very much not true in tone for Gerard's solo album, which is... kind of heavy considering the timeframe it was produced/released and toured for in) but with FOB death has always been this thing right there, in the midst of them. it's a present haunting. I think the difference really comes down to: MCR is fighting death. FOB is breaking up with it.

@a-mag-a-day Today I'm thinking about Martin, specifically, how quote-unquote human he really still is

he's clearly fallen on the side of 'Watcher' in the Eyepocalypse, not surprising perhaps, cause he already was able to turn invisible or something like it in s4 from the Lonely, and had to be 'both Lonely and Watching' enough for Peter's plan to at least work in theory. and while not as deep in it as Jon, he's still worked for the Eye for 10 years iirc, and he's marked by it to the point that it's a part of his domain

Martin in canon appears occasionally insensitive to Jon's new impulses, acting as the straight man to his avatar-ness. But we know that Martin's really good at acting like how he thinks things ought to be, while ignoring how he knows them to be deep down. (examples: him being the last one to accept Sasha is gone, at first instance assuming Jon must've been brainwashed in 142 Scrutiny, "I'm knackered!' -'Are you?' -'... ok, well, no, but i feel like i should be")

so i wonder, how much of his reactions are because Jon's words are genuinely alien to him, and how much is just posturing, exaggerating how he feels like he should react, to ignore when Jon's experiences feel relatable, or that niggling idea that, if everyone in this world is either victim or watcher, and Martin feels remarkably good, all things considered... well.

Or,

accidentally made another autistic mc. wonder how many i made before i even realized i was autistic

OG Choi Han they could never make me hate you cause if some random rich boy was yelling at me and telling me my family deserved to die like a day after it happened and all I wanted was to know how I could get help I’d beat him up too

This plus the added fact that the Harris Village people were the first people to take Choi Han in and take care of him after years and years in the dark forest. Like he’s obviously not going to be mentally stable after all that, and he was so young when everything happened to him like I cannot blame him at all. I don’t think I can ever hate OG Choi Han like ever, he’s flawed, he has problems, but I love him dearly. He deserves the world. This kid who had to fight for his life, was taken away from his family, and in the process had to give up parts of his own humanity to survive, and like went to war two years later, they could never make me hate u OG Choi Han…

Like yeah violence is bad I guess but OG Cale had it coming(saying this as an OG Cale fan, I love him, but he was mean as hell when he was younger!)

If I’m honest, I think they were both in the wrong to an extent. Like OG Cale shouldn’t have said all that no matter the circumstances, and OG Choi Han shouldn’t have beaten him up so much. But u say mean shit and you get hit, that is how it will work when you’re talking to the guy who just saw his entire village get murdered like idkkkk man

I understand where OG Cale was coming from, but he had many issues and while he wasn’t an awful person, he was capable of doing bad things because of his own internalized pain and emotions that he never got to properly process because of his emotionally distant childhood and relationship with his father who should have been there for him more when he was younger.

Okay speaking of his childhood, Deruth isn’t the WORST father in the world but there are a lot of things he could have done better. I think a lot of Deruth’s flaws come from his fear of failure and messing up. He’s scared of doing the wrong thing, and so he sticks to doing what he knows and using what he knows best. That’s why he uses his money, that’s why gift giving is his way of showing affection, he knows that it is one thing he cannot mess up.

The problem is that money and gifts is NOT what OG Cale needed. I think what that guy needed the most was a parent who wasn’t afraid to talk to him, to ask him questions. Not to say that Deruth gave up on OG Cale, but I think in a way he gave up on OG Cale by giving up on himself. Deruth didn’t trust himself to have the capabilities to talk to OG Cale, which is why he never did. It’s because that Deruth was scared, and didn’t trust himself, that he could never face OG Cale

If Deruth was able to trust himself a little more, and pull himself together, I don’t think OG Cale would have turned out the way he did. As a kid, he probably thought the only way he could help his family without relying on anyone(no doubt this whole ‘I have to do it myself’ thing came from the fact that he couldn’t rely on his father when his mom died, and instead was acting as a pillar of support for his father when it should have been the other way around) was to sabotage himself, the only heir. If he was shown to be unfit to be heir, then everyone else would have no choice but to direct their hatred towards him instead of his family.

If Deruth had talked to his son at least ONCE when he was a kid, asking him why he was upset or why he did the things he did, I think OG Cale would have told him. Why? Because he’s a kid!! A kid will obviously want to rely on his father, if he just had one sign telling him that he didn’t have to do it alone I’m 90% sure OG Cale would have said something.

Basically, while Deruth isn’t the worst father, he’s not really a great father either. I think he does do his best, but he has issues with communication lol

OG Cale and OG Choi Han are both complex characters and had their own reasons to behave the way they did. The thing is with people is that they’re complicated and have layers, so the situation with them would have layers behind it as well with multiple co-existing truths and stuff

it’s so weird to think that ryuji was only a major character in one canon game. like he’s such a strong character with such a strong personality it doesn’t feel like he was only prominent in one canon game at ALL. he feels almost as ever-present and beloved as someone like daigo and yet he’s basically never even mentioned after kiwami 2. that’s so crazy to me.

i won't draw anything specifically for pride month because i'm always gay but happy toxic yaoi month everyone

I think a lot about how he's very circumspect about it but if you ask the right questions or make the wrong choices Gale will basically straight up tell you that the life and will of a god's Chosen is basically subsumed by the will of their god. That they have no choice but to obey. I especially think about it a lot when I think about the fact that Mystra was his teacher and mentor and he must have become one of her Chosen pretty young

I understand the appeal of drawing connections between characters of similar archetypes or personalities between MXTX's works, "(TGCF character) is just like (MDZS character)", or rather "(TGCF character) is the (MDZS character) of TGCF", but when people say things like that i feel they're rather missing the message from TGCF that two people are not the same. Even if everything on paper makes it look that way. They're not. Thats. Rather integral to TGCF'S story, actually.

when “ nico and i aren't friends ” meets “ in my heart, he's still my best friend...just kidding. ”.

neurodivergency moment on my part

Still fascinating to me that there's people who truly think their experiences are universal, that because something is popular in the circles they run in means that everyone should know it and will insult and treat people like stupid uncultured swine for even perceived differences in experiences. or if folks disagree with them when they make overly broad generalizations on what 'everyone' knows or thinks.

(b/c it's not like poor people, people from different cultures/subcultures, and people with fundamentally different interests exist.)

Like? That's complete asshat behavior.