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venushasvixens · 1 year

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Ch. 5 Escape - Baneful Royal (Kylo Ren x Reader)

[A/N] so the last time I had posted for this fic, it was a hot minute ago. And when I say hot minute, I mean about close to a year. SO with that being said, here is the 5th chapter. This one was kinda hiding underneath a bunch of commission files so finding it now was very nice. If you would like to read more Kylo fics from me, I have a Masterlist link in my bio, as well as a A03 and wattpad under the same name. Thank y’all for reading <3

There was no time to feel guilt.

There was no time to feel anything.

You were ushered without a thought. Running on autopilot, the disturbing sounds of a city thrown into chaos were drowned out with your focus elsewhere. Cate’s arm was looped into yours, the cloaked figure of Kylo walked in front of you without assistance or care. The deed was done, and the next step was approaching soon.

Pushed into a carrier, it wasn't until you felt the deep rumble of the ship coming to life that you finally came back to the present. Seated and strapped in, you glanced around you to see Cate at her place behind you. On her side, two guards of Ren stood like stone, waiting patiently. For what, you didn't know.

Voices spit out necessary actions for takeoff, with a confirmation greeting. A captain’s seat sat in the middle, with Kylo planted firmly. With each acknowledgment of action, he nodded. A shake, and you were off into the air and into the atmosphere.

“What’s happening now?” You turned to Cate. “Where are we going?”

You knew of your certain protection, but nothing else after. Had you left when the Colonel told you to, maybe you wouldn't have been labeled a possible enemy to the planet. Gone off quietly, you might have still been on Naboo. You showed yourself rather idiotically. With a hand out in offer, any chance of going home was thrown out the window.

Cate looked straight ahead blankly, ignoring your asking gaze.

“I said where are we going?” You asked. Ignored, you watched as Cate’s pupils flashed quickly to her side, towards the knights. Turning back in your chair, you realized. You sabotaged her mission, and any other advice or word could further deepen a possible and serious “demotion”.

Watching as Naboo faded away in the side windows, you were startled with Kylo's sudden announcement. “On our arrival, we are to ignite engines for light speed on route to Coruscant immediately.”

“This wasn't part of the plan.” You said aloud, shocked. “I didn’t agree to this part.”

“Then what was, councilwoman?” Kylo called to the reluctant voice. “Had you listened, we wouldn’t be taking the actions that we are now.”

“I wonder with whose help.” You spat back. The newly deceased governor was right. There was an argument wherever you went.

“The option to go back and drop you off is always open. But, I hope you realize that actions will have consequences.” He stated, almost tauntingly. “It would be a shame to see your head on a spike.”

“A favor was given for the good of the people.”

“They won’t see it that way.” He sneered, leather glove squeaking. “The truth is soon to come out. Where are you going to go when that does happen?”

It was best to shut up.

With many to witness, the assassination of a government official was without a doubt a high profiled crime to commit. To accompany the ill news, the revelation of a colleague and former head of state with her hand in his murder would surely send embarrassment to the planet. More harm was caused than good.

Maybe it was the smartest idea to escape.

You shut your eyes tightly as you the grim thought of Abie and Sara finding out. You lied to them both. Hatred was a driving factor, but not murder. You prayed that they could one day forgive you. It was probably going to take a long time to do.

You saw the faint reflection of the Finalizer bounce off the glass panels, indicating your destination was close.

“The Supreme Leader’s secondary vessel requesting permission to dock, copy.”

“Permission granted.” A modulated voice rang out. “Prepare to unload.”

The last First Order ship you had visited was nothing compared to this. The vast high ceilings towered over all, with as many small ships docked neatly into the walls. Officials ran amok, hurrying to finish a job or to clear the way. The ship jostled as it landed, causing you to tussle in your seat.

“Wow.” You whispered.

“I believe it is time to disembark, councilwoman.” You heard Kylo say, taking off his seatbelt. You did the same, standing up as gracefully as you could.

You felt the faint brush of Kylo’s cloak graze your leg. Standing next to you, but not fixated on you. His presence felt overpowering, like he had done this many times before. The adrenaline was still rushing in you, garnering you to shake and quiver slightly.

As the hatch opened, you saw two single file lines on either side of stormtroopers. They stood with their blasters in hands, looking straight ahead in respect. As you inched forward, you caught eye of a special trooper. Tall and donned in shining silver, this stormtrooper was like no other. A black cape hung over one shoulder, with a red line trimmed on its hem. With no eyes to look into, you could only imagine what kind of a being they were. Their air was grand, big shoes that were filed with fear and respect.

“Welcome back, sir.” They said to Kylo. Their feminine tone was evident in their voice, clear and orderly. You had no thoughts, except one. If they are a she, then that is one big woman.

Still in awe, you almost missed the silver commander’s next question. “Have we acquired the subject?”

“Affirmative, Captain.” Kylo replied, walking next to her.

“Hold on, subject?!” You called out, still two steps behind them. You tried to rush to Kylo, desperate for answers. Before you could reach him, gloved hands pulled you by your forearms and held you back. You glanced at them both, visors staring down menacingly at you. With Cate’s footsteps echoing off the ramp, the image of her strode in front of your person. Still blank.

“You are to be escorted onto the ship until we hit lightspeed.” Was all she said before turning and joining Kylo.

Your head dropped. All of this felt fake. Nothing of it felt real at all. Not even an hour ago, you were home. With a skip in your step about the future and being free of the thorn in your side, only to be replaced with another. Slowly and painfully, it was going to be hard to dig this one out.

A First Order vessel. Shooting out of the sector and into the inner Rim. The death of a political official and your life as you know it. All within a short amount of time. The time to process it began as you were escorted out of the hangar and into the ship itself.

You felt like you were hit with a ton of bricks.

The hallways bustled with every employee of the Order, rushing to unknown locations. The memo of lightspeed must’ve been ordered quickly. All of their heads were down as you passed them, averting their eyes from walking cloaks of darkness on either of your side.

You clasped your hands in front, careful to take note from those around you. You glanced up at the Knights, whose boots clanked almost like the Supreme Leader’s. There was emptiness to their step, like strictly programmed droids who were on the way to the next task.

“Are you both allowed to talk to me?” You asked, looking up at one of them. They continued in silence. “I see. Maybe a vow of silence.”

You felt the need to press further. It looked like a risky attempt to talk to monsters carrying you to your death. Risky, or maybe sad.

“Those weapons look menacing. Serious damage to anyone that crosses you.”

Silence.

“Good, I didn’t want to talk to you bucketheads anyways.” You muttered, rather disappointed from the one sided talk.

You heard the same leather squeak from them like you did with Kylo earlier. You looked down at one gripping his weapon rather tightly. You swallowed, yet taking another que. At least it relieved some of the stress you were carrying, saying that. Sad that they were in your path of insult, but then again, you would swiftly be met with a blade in your throat.

The tight hallway grew to a broader area, full with more First Order personnel. Stormtroopers guarded every corner, standing at full attention. The knights beelined you to two sets of blast doors, with people bustling about. Most walked in and out, in pairs or with a holopad in hand. When coming into their sight, there was another hush among them. But this time, there were slivers of notice. Gawked at wasn’t new to you, but the setting was.

The blast doors opened, revealing the bridge of the ship. Various stations were hard at work operating the ins and outs of the ship’s defense and operation. So focused, there was no acknowledgment of your presence. There was a quick conclusion that if they were looking anywhere besides their screen, they would be shot on sight.

Ahead of you were the giant windows out looking at Naboo. It felt like a screen, seeing your home from miles above the surface. Growing bigger as you were walked further in, you couldn't help but tear up just a little.

These conflicting feelings of justifying your dark deed for the good of the planet and your own wounded morals clashed against one another, fighting for the dominance of your stand. You had sickened you, the need to fill your own selfish gain. Moment of passion destroyed your life as you had known it. Now it was time to pay the consequences, but stubborn as you were, it was going to be hard to accept it.

“You are to wait here. Our Master will join shortly.” One Knight croaked, voice startling you out of your moment of sentiment.

They backed up some, keeping their distance. The blast doors opened again, this time the flamed hair general jaunting towards you. You flipped around, taking in a deep sigh. Bound to be on an official First Order ship, you had to at least expect to see him sooner or later.

“Ah, councilwoman.” He shot you a grim, wide smile. “We meet again, under some unfortunate circumstances.”

“Unfortunate, indeed.” You replied, gripping your hands tightly. “Where’s the Supreme Leader?”

“Oh come now, at least give me a chat.” He feigned disappointment mockingly. “After all, this is my setting, my domain. I am more than welcoming.”

“I’ve been told, or rather talked over, that we are to be out of this sector any minute now.” You said. “The Supreme Leader cannot possibly be holding out on an escape.”

“I wouldn’t call it an escape, councilwoman. However, we may just have a chance at some resolution to the chaos that put us here in the first place?” Hux raised his brows.

You tried to read his face to see if it had some truth. You silently hoped that you weren't being pushed into another set up. Peace with Naboo was what you so desperately strived for. It would calm your worried mind. If it meant that you could never return to maintain harmony, you would take it. But not without heartbreak.

“Then let us try.” Hux finished, turning his back to you as he continued with his recent assessment for departure. How acutely they all listened, hanging on to every quip and jeer he threw out in his words. Still able to take orders under such stress, unlike you did. “Annoying as this inconvenience is.”

“I did what I did for a reason. You would too if you were pushed so far.” You snarled back. “Would you have done it too?”

Hux glared at you, his face changing so slightly. Eyes softened, almost to sympathize. Human as you both were, maybe it did cross his mind of holding himself out from the rest. He glanced up. The doors opened and Kylo glided in. The scowl came back and so was the top general of the First Order.

“I give commands and follow orders.” He said. “I see no reason for such emotion.”

“It's a proper system for a machine to work. There's a purpose for it.” Kylo followed up, his helmet still on. “But we are not droids.”

“And you encouraged it.” You said to him, staring into his dark visor. “I'm not the only one at fault here.”

“Who said it was not the right thing?” You heard Kylo said lowly in his helmet. Moving closer to you, his voice was soft enough to not be picked up by the vocoder. “Put trust in that decision, (Y/n).”

Biting down on your lip, losing your focus on him.

“Put trust in me.”

A beep sounded off loudly on the bridge. “This is the Security Force of Naboo requesting urgent communication with your vessel.”

Breathing in deeply, you felt as if your heart was going to burst out of your chest. Thumping loudly, rhythmically against your rib cage, you would rather your heart did some damage right now. Anything to avoid this, avoid your betrayal.

“Stay here. Leave communication to us.” Kylo said. “You will not move from your spot, unless I say otherwise.”

“I will not move from this spot unles you say otherwise.” Aghast at the loss of control of your body, your feet planted where they stayed. Frozen once more.

“Holograph transmission, sir. Permission to accept?” A controller asked from their position.

Permission granted.”

Kylo and Hux stood in front of the transmission circle, their fronts lighting up with the familiar blue light. You drew in your breath as you saw the Queen, standing solemnly with Abie at her side. The Queen conveyed a deep seriousness you knew deep inside her. Dormant, having been cast aside when the council had done it for her. It wasn’t the childlike display of fear that was present. No. It was the face of a proper monarch, ready to take on her new challenge for her people.

“Appearance is everything,” you told her. “They won’t just take your words into consideration.”

For a brief moment, the creeping anxiety of your situation disappeared. In its place, was pride. Just for a second. Abie, on the other hand. A different story. His anger seethed off of him, being well seen from almost everyone on the bridge.

“Your Majesty, to what we owe the pleasure of your company?” Hux said.

“There is none, General. I would like to be told of the reason for my urgent return to the palace, with my home in disarray and chaos. Our Governor slain and my councilwoman nowhere to be seen.” She proclaimed. “Even with our arms open to your presence in our desperate hour, we are repaid with nothing but hardship.”

“Although a controversial decision, your majesty, it was the right one.” Kylo began, taking over for Hux. After all, who wouldn’t want to hear the murderer tell his side of the story? “Let's face the clearer picture. Governor Sillin was a joke to Naboo. A laughing stock to the galaxy. So in fairness, the First Order did what was the preferable outcome.”

“Did this outcome happened to include the disappearance of Councilwoman (L/N)?” Queen Revisalla snapped back, her tone grew sharp. “Full control is what you strive for, then so be it. But I ask, no I demand that she be returned alive and unharmed.”

“I see.” Kylo replied, feigning a deep thought. “I’m afraid I cannot allow for the release of her into your hands.”

“And why?” Revisalla asked, the tension from her and Abie grew even more. “This is beyond ridiculous. To capture a government official and a former monarch is a serious crime.”

“That does not matter to us, as you can tell your majesty.” Hux cut in, clasping his hands behind his back. “We did ask for full allegiance in order for help from our forces. Young as you are, do try to take a smarter route and think of this as a small price for our assistance.”

How badly you wanted to break free of your place and take down Hux as well. You wouldn’t need a saber for this, only your bare hands.

“I understand your emotions, your majesty. “Kylo stepped forward. “There is a shared understanding when something dear is taken away from us. It becomes a driving force, our mindset. Sometimes for the better.”

You gazed at the queen. Her eyes glanced down, in deepful thought. It wounded deeply as you saw her face drift into each possibility and hard decision. Everything was spilling over. Whatever was to happen next was going to determine your place. Your life was on the line. And so were the million lives on the planet.

“I will not back down without a fight for this.” Revisalla spoke clearly. “We will bring her back, with your help or not. I will see to it that she is returned home alive.”

Your breath was knocked out of you. There was a vague idea on what kind of response that would be.

“So be it.” Kylo said.

“As you left us no choice your majesty, we must do what is necessary.” Hux proclaimed, turning to the rest of the bridge. “All personnel to their stations. Deploy the TIEs. Let's make sure the message is sent.”

“Yes, sir.” The voiced response was swift, echoing in your ears as the worst had to come. Still frozen to your spot, there was no way physically that you could try to stop this. But you were going to try. You heaved as you struggled to move. The fight response in you cried out to be released.

“Wait, no!” You screamed. Suddenly, as if to be let off a chain, you stumbled forward. Catching your step, you rushed to the hologram, panting. Revisalla took a sudden intake of breath, surprised. So did Abie. Shaking your head, you held up your hands. “You don’t want to do this. Please do not do this.”

“Halt the deployment of TIEs.” Hux commanded. Your adrenaline dropped in relief.

“Is your safety compromised, Lady (Y/n)?” The queen asked you. Abie’s appearance could’ve looked just like yours, relieved but shaken.

“No, I’m fine. I’m okay.” You breathed. “I beg your majesty to listen. One person to an entire people, it cannot happen.”

“Excellent point.” Hux mumbled.

You ignored his remark as you tried to find the right words. “I am not worth it. If this is where my path leads me, this is where I stay. I need you to understand that.”

Revisalla swallowed, her fingers slightly tugging on her long sleeve. Not only were you talking to her, but to your heartbroken friend as well. He looked down, so still you thought the hologram was frozen.

“I understand. Efforts in the future to retrieve your person will be permanently terminated.” Strong and loud, you felt the tug of loss. You were now officially a subject to the First Order.

You nodded.

“Before our communication is severed, there is something I need to ask of you.” Revisalla added. “There are words of your involvement in the death of the governor.”

You felt Kylo’s presence flair behind you. His air taunted you as the cold truth was about to be let loose in the open. This was a moment that he was waiting for, as if he was waiting for the downfall of your life.

“Is there truth to this?” She finally said.

You looked back at Kylo. As it pained you to say, this truly meant there was no way to return back to home. The tie would be forever severed. The planet would be safe. Abie and Sara would be safe. The queen will be safe. And maybe peace will find its way back to Naboo, with a brighter future for everyone. The one you so longed to see.

“Yes.” You replied firmly. “I killed Sillin.”

Abie’s shoulders fell in defeat. Revisalla nodded solemnly. The disappointment from both of them radiated strongly.“I-“

“There you have it, your majesty. Loud and clear.” You were cut off from Hux. “It is now time that we make our departure from the sector.”

“I bid you all farewell.” Revisalla’s tone was monotonous, professional. Just another goodbye to visiting “diplomats”. The hologram faded and you were left with the sight of Naboo once again.

#fanfiction #star wars #ben solo #kylo ren #kylo ren x reader #kylo ren x you #kylo ren headcanons #kylo ren trash #Ben swolo #ben solo deserves to live #adam driver #force awakens #rise of skywalker #the last jedi #kylo ren imagines #general hux

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sweetrevxnge · 2 years

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Like Phantoms, Forever

Chapter Five | What Is and What Should Never Be

Pairing: Ben Solo x Reader

Summary: Your destiny had never been clear to you, only becoming so when it led you to leaving behind the life you knew to train with the galaxy's sole Jedi Master, Luke Skywalker. His Jedi Academy became your new home, bringing with it the promise of someday becoming a Jedi Knight. While navigating the ways of the Force, an inexplicable connection forms between you and a fellow student—the heir to the legendary Skywalker bloodline, Ben Solo. Together, the two of you must face your destinies and forge the path to your true selves.

What to expect: fluff, violence, sexual content, general angst, mentions/descriptions of injury and death

Additional info: this story is set in 28 ABY, six years prior to the events of TFA

*concurrently being published on AO3 and Wattpad as well!

Masterlist

Word count: 4.6k

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Ben was right. Master Skywalker had been planning to advance you to lightsaber technique training in the coming days. The prospect of this advancement filled you with excitement, eager to begin and start feeling like you weren’t a lifetime behind your peers. Unfortunately for you, the only experience you had with wielding weapons was a toy blaster you lifted from one of the snotty-nosed boys in your elementary class. Something told you that a prop blaster was no match for a lightsaber. Just a sneaking suspicion.

You were finishing up what you could only assume was one of the last guided meditation sessions with Master Skywalker when he informed you of his plan. From the very minute you learned it, the only thing you could think about was sharing the news with Ben.

The twin suns had been hidden behind a blanket of puffy, gray clouds all morning. But come midday, they were beginning to give way, allowing narrow rays of light to spill onto the ground. You inhaled the scent of moisture evaporating off of the stones that marked the path to the dining hall, relishing the fresh aroma.

As the sunlight washed over you, gooseflesh erupted across your skin, sending a warm shiver through your body. With the rainy season fast approaching, you hoped that the clouds would stay separated for the remainder of the day, to enjoy one of the last sunny days for the coming weeks.

It had been nearly impossible to focus recently, your mind often drifting to your time spent with Ben the other night. The devious creature that was your brain was incessantly conjuring the image of him in his unkempt robes, replaying how the distance closed between the two of you as you were leaving. Truthfully, it was delusional to believe that Ben felt the same way, but the sick, masochistic part of you still clung to the hope. Perhaps this was just part of the Jedi condition—suffering the throes of unrequited feelings in a way that still honored the Jedi Code.

Pushing the curtain aside, you entered the dining hall, instinctively searching the room for Ben. In your surveillance, you spotted a familiar face, but not Ben’s.

Voe was sitting with two unfamiliar students, the likes of which you assumed you met and subsequently forgot in the haze of your first day. The promise of eating lunch with her soon had entirely slipped your mind, considering that the events ensuing your happenstance encounter had purchased the primary real estate of your consciousness.

Disregarding the question of where Ben was, you picked up a clean tray and walked over to the array of lunch offerings. A growl rumbled in your stomach as you picked out a ronto wrap, inhaling the warm steam trailing off of it.

How does Master Skywalker import such a diverse selection of food? The Academy’s location was kept confidential for the safety of the students, as well as their Master. Despite being a decorated hero of the Rebellion, Imperial loyalists remained throughout the galaxy, ones that were not particularly fond of him—or his efforts to rebuild the Jedi Order.

You set your tray next to Voe’s and sat down, greeting the blonde padawan. She was truly striking. Her captivating green eyes and flawless brown skin were enough to make anyone envious of her perfection. She was sporting her usual updo—three thick braids that trailed down her scalp before unfurling into loose curls that tumbled down her shoulders. Should she ever want to leave this life behind, she could easily make it as a model on Coruscant, donning the finest couture in the galaxy.

“And here I was thinking that you had forgotten about getting lunch together,” Voe smirked as she wrapped an arm around your shoulders.

“Of course I didn’t forget!”

If the Academy was teaching you anything, it was how to become a better liar.

“You’ve met Tai and Hennix, right?” she asked, motioning toward the two men sitting beside her.

Your mouth opened to respond, but before you could articulate an answer, one of the men interjected.

“Yeah, we met her when she arrived,” he said coolly. “Tai and Hennix, in case you forgot.” He nodded toward the Quarren sitting beside him as he said the latter name.

“You’re a lucky girl, you know that?” Hennix said. “It took years of pestering to finally wear this one down, but somehow you managed to do it almost immediately.”

“Oh, give me a break, Hen,” Voe sneered before prodding at the food on her plate.

“Hey! I’m just saying, you’re a tough shell to crack.” He laughed, his tentacles quivering with the force of it.

You couldn’t help but giggle at the conversation unfolding in front of you. Their friendships must be like no other, considering they have known each other for the better part of their entire lives.

As they continued to chat, you picked at your plate to keep yourself occupied, as well as to satiate your growing hunger. Their conversation turned into white noise as your mind sifted through the drone of passing thoughts. The mention of your name caused you to snap out of the trance.

“So,” Tai repeated your name, “you’re the girl who’s got Solo’s head all scattered.”

“Hm?” you hummed through a mouthful of grilled ronto, still not entirely following the conversation. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“I mean,” he drawled as he leaned onto his elbows, “you’re the girl that Ben hasn’t shut up about.” He cocked an eyebrow, his attempt at soliciting a reaction from you.

Recognizing the hot seat you were now sitting in, you masked your reaction, carrying on chewing your food as if he hadn’t just implied what you thought he did.

You barely had time to react to learning Ben’s surname, a detail you surprisingly knew nothing about until now. It sounded vaguely familiar. Maybe if you weren’t busy directing all of your energy into redirecting this conversation away from Ben, you would be able to think critically about where you knew it from. But that wasn’t the case.

For now, ignorance, and possibly some light damage control, were your best defenses.

“I think you’re mistaken. I barely know Ben.”

Tai tilted his head slightly, intrigued. “Well he sure seems to know you. It’s all he’s been talking about recently. You can hardly have a conversation with the man without your name being brought up.”

The implications of his words made your head spin, but you couldn’t indulge such thoughts right now. Right now, steering this conversation away from Ben Solo was of utmost priority.

“Like I said, I barely know him.” You tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear, averting your eyes from Tai’s stare. “I am flattered though. I’m sure he’s a great guy.”

“He’s a moody prick, that’s what he is.” Voe all but threw her utensils down on her plate, turning the attention to her as she spoke. “Thinks he’s better than everyone else.”

Hennix cleared his throat and scratched the side of his neck before chiming in. “You’re still hung up on it, huh?”

Hung up on what? you thought, not privy to the context of Voe’s outburst. From what you understood, Voe’s resentment toward Ben stemmed from their competitive relationship, nothing that would warrant her calling him a “moody prick” to his peers.

“Zip it, Hen,” she hissed as she stood from her seat, ignoring your stare.

Voe stormed out of the dining hall, leaving you, Tai, and Hennix to marinate in the uncomfortable air she left behind. You pushed your food around with your fork, hoping for an opportune time to make your own exit.

Tai rubbed his temples and let out a long whistle, breaking the silence the three of you were steeped in.

“I didn’t know she’d be so…” Hennix paused, looking for the right word to use.

“Sensitive?” Tai finished for him, taking a sip of his drink. “Yeah, me neither. If you ask me, I think it’s time for her to get over it.”

Curiosity clawed at your throat, desperate to know more about what just occurred. But you suppressed it, not wanting to discuss the subject without Voe’s knowledge. Whatever had set her off was clearly a delicate topic, and despite what your feelings for Ben may allude, you still respected her far too much to gossip behind her back.

You wiped your mouth with a napkin and ran your damp palms down your robes, signaling to the others that you were leaving.

“Well, uh, it was nice chatting with you guys.”

“Hey, you too.” Tai nodded at you, a mischievous look in his eyes. “And say ‘hi’ to Ben for me, will ya?”

The two men smiled knowingly, to which you rolled your eyes and rose from your seat. They exchanged a smug look as you stood from the table, turning on your heels and leaving as quickly as possible.

A cloudy haze washed over you as you left the building, trying to process what exactly just happened. You’re the girl Ben hasn’t shut up about. Tai’s words replayed in your mind, taunting you, begging you to feed them attention.

This couldn’t be happening. This had to be some cruel prank being pulled on you, one specially designed to make you suffer. You and Ben were friends. And of course, people talk about their friends with their other friends. Friends talk about friends, right? What does the word ‘friend’ even mean? If you say a word enough, it begins to sound like a fake word, like something you have created in your own mind and assigned meaning to. Not so dissimilar to your feelings for Ben.

As you approached your hut, raindrops began to hit your face, scattering across the ground below you. During the course of lunch, the cold, gray clouds had crept closer, covering the two suns. So much for a sunny afternoon.

You swung your door open and let it fall shut behind you, peeling the outer layers of your robes off, your sights set on your sorry excuse for a bed. There was enough time before the evening training session for you to nap. After all, getting some rest wouldn’t hurt—not to mention that it would temporarily silence your racing thoughts.

Pulling off your wet boots, you crawled into bed and relaxed into the pillow, releasing the tension in your neck and shoulders as you did. Before long, exhaustion consumed you, your eyes fluttering shut as the soft patter of rain hit your roof, lulling you to sleep.

A knock at your door roused you from your slumber, nearly indiscernible over rhythmic pelting of rain outside. The world was blurry as your eyes adjusted, your consciousness attempting to do the same.

The suns’ light had completely vanquished, leaving the sky a dark abyss. Shit, shit, shit. Another knock rattled your door, sending a wave of panic through you.

“U-uh, one second!”

You scrambled out of bed, fumbling blindly for the lantern set atop your bedside table. In a moment of utter grace and elegance, you knocked nearly everything else off the surface, pawing for the tin cylinder. Your fingertips found the switch, flicking it and igniting the bulb within the glass. Pulling on your cloak and stepping into your still-damp boots, you stumbled to the door, picturing a very wet, and disappointed, Master Skywalker behind it.

Just as your trembling hand squeezed the handle, another knock landed on the metal, causing you to flinch at the noise. Trepidation coiled in your stomach as you pulled the door back, revealing the man beyond it. To your surprise, it wasn’t an angry Master Skywalker you found, but Ben Solo instead, drenched from head to toe and holding a covered dinner tray in his hands.

“I was starting to think maybe you had run away,” Ben said with a laugh, raindrops trickling down his face.

“Stars, Ben.” You clutched your heaving chest, feeling more disoriented now than you were before. “I thought you were Master Skywalker coming to chew me out.”

“Chew you out?” He shook his head, sending water running down the sides of his hood. “No, no. The evening session was canceled, didn’t you see the message on your datapad?”

“I wasn’t even aware that I had a datapad until now.”

Ben chuckled. “I refuse to believe that you haven’t opened your bedside drawer the entire time you’ve been here.”

“Well,” you said, placing your free hand on your hip, “how was I supposed to know there was stuff in the drawers?”

“Master Skywalker really skimped out on showing you around, didn’t he?”

“I guess so.”

A drop of rainwater rolled down Ben’s pointed nose, a reminder that he was still standing in the downpour.

“Shit, I’m so sorry. Please, come in. I’ll get you a towel.”

“Oh, yeah, thank you.” He ducked into the hut and set down the tray he had been carrying on the first surface he could find. “Since you missed dinner, I saved you a plate of bocha. And because I know how much you like it.”

Damn him, bocha was one of your favorites. He wasn’t making it easy for you to quash your feelings. You watched as he pushed his hood back and sloughed the wet robe off his shoulders, glancing around your room with it draped over his arm, unsure what to do with it.

“Where should I, uh, put this?”

The door squeaked shut behind you as you reached to help him. “Here, I got it. You can sit wherever you’d like.”

You stretched the material in your hands and hung it from the lip of a jutting plank from the wall. When you turned around, you found Ben crouched down by the fire pit, digging through his pockets in search of something.

“How are you not freezing in here?” He glanced up to you, his hands still rummaging through his robes.

To his credit, it was incredibly cold in the room. Stars, you were a bad host. “I guess I’ve just gotten used to it. I haven’t used the fire pit yet, either.”

“You might want to start. Winter will be here before you know it.”

“I mean, you’re probably right. Is there a hidden lighter in that bedside drawer, too?”

You fished out a fresh towel from your drawers, hearing a triumphant ah-ha behind you. Ben flicked the cap off a silver lighter, testing the flame, before reaching down and igniting the firewood.

“No, there’s no issued lighter. The last thing Master Skywalker needs is someone accidentally burning their hut down. We’re supposed to use our datapads to call a protocol droid in to start the fires, but I snagged this years ago while I was off-world.”

A wave of heat rose from the dry wood as flames spread throughout the pit, bathing you in its warmth. “Well, isn’t that handy,” you muttered, preoccupied with the fact that Ben was actually here, alone with you, in your hut.

“Much better,” he sighed as he sat back on his hands, satisfied with his work.

“Here, I don’t want you getting sick because of me.” You sat down next to him and handed him the towel. “As much as I hate to admit it, I think you were right about how cold it was in here.”

He smirked. “I know I’m right. You haven’t spent a winter here yet.” He rubbed the towel over his hair, squeezing the water from his dark locks. “Keep it, you’re gonna need it.”

You raised an eyebrow at him as he stuck the lighter out to you. “Oh, yeah?”

“Yes,” he said with a chuckle, draping the towel around the back of his neck. “We may not get a lot of snow here, but it’ll still freeze over.”

The flames danced in the reflection of the light as you inspected it in your palm, mindlessly flicking the cap off and on as your thoughts drifted to the memories of winter on Dantooine. It would rain throughout most of the season, but never get to freezing temperatures. The air was so clean, so crisp, and just the right temperature to leave your window cracked at night, inviting the smell of the rain-soaked grasslands to waft in.

Flipping the lighter shut, you pulled yourself from your daydream and stuffed the metal cube in a pocket.

“Mmm,” you exhaled through your nostrils, “I was looking forward to seeing it snow here. It only ever rained on Dantooine.”

Ben discarded the towel behind him and ran a hand through his hair, smoothing back his damp curls. “You’ll see snow, alright,” he smiled, leaning back onto his palms. “At some point during your lightsaber training, you’ll go to Ilum—and trust me, there’s plenty of snow there to fulfill your heart’s desires.”

“I’m going to go to Ilum?” you echoed his words, unsettled that your Master had not mentioned any of this to you yet. “Wait, what’s on Ilum? Why is this the first I’m hearing about it?”

“Wow, Master Skywalker hasn’t told you anything, has he?” His gaze shifted from the quivering flames to you. “Ilum is where Jedi go to find their kyber crystal—to build their lightsaber,” he explained as he moved to poke the fire with an unscathed stick from the pile. “Master Skywalker took all of us as a group when we were still younglings, but you’re an exception.”

He squeezed your shoulder, the feeling of which caused a warmth in your chest to stir. Stars, how pathetic you were.

“So, Master Skywalker and I are going to go there?” you asked, unable to hide the concern in your voice. “No offense to him, but he’s kind of intimidating.”

“I don’t necessarily disagree with you.” A short exhale escaped his lips. “But as he’s gotten older, he’s become less tolerant of journeys, and extreme temperatures. So, he asked me if I would go with you instead.”

Your eyes widened at his words. “You’re going to go with me?”

“Yes,” he replied, nudging you with his elbow. “Relax, it’ll be fun. And cold. But mostly fun.”

While the prospect of being off-world with Ben was exhilarating, you could only imagine what Voe would think when she found out. Knowing her, she’d likely be furious that she wasn’t asked by Master Skywalker to accompany you.

“Just get through this training and you’ll be building a lightsaber in no time.” He offered you a sincere smile, his dimples curved and his eyes gleaming in the light of the fire.

“Speaking of, Master Skywalker told me that I’ll be starting next week!” In the chaos of today, you had nearly forgotten to tell him the news.

“You’re going to do great.”

“Thanks, Ben.” Hugging your knees against your chest, you stared off into the fire. “I’m nervous though, I feel like I’m going in blind. I don’t want to disappoint him any more than I already have.”

He locked eyes with you, pulling his teeth over his lower lip as he considered his response. “I can help you,” he said, clearing his throat before continuing. “Like, I could teach you some of the basics so you’ll know what to expect.”

A daring remark crossed your mind, one that you couldn’t pass up the opportunity to say. “Ben, is this your way of asking me out?”

There was a pause after you asked the question, a pause so palpable that you could almost feel the air hanging between you. Sweat beaded at the nape of your neck, panic flooding your veins and seizing your chest. Not only was it a stupid thing to say, it was possibly the swiftest way to end your friendship.

Ben rolled his tongue over the inside of his cheek before finally answering. “Only if you want it to be,” he replied smoothly, as if you hadn’t just essentially shattered the Jedi Code with your question. His gaze was unwavering from yours, piercing you as you realized what he said.

You parted your lips and inhaled a shallow breath, a desperate attempt to calm your racing heart as it pounded violently against your ribs, its rhythm deafening you as you formulated a response.

“I think I would like that,” you said softly as you stared at him, feeling as if the world was shifting beneath you.

“Then yes, it's a date.”

Ben smirked, wrapping a strong arm around you and drawing you closer to him. You were a rag doll in his grasp, allowing yourself to be pulled into him, resting your head on his shoulder. He craned down to press a quick kiss on the top of your head before resting his cheek on the same spot.

Emboldened by the success of your last flirtatious line, you leaned back to look at him, an expression of pseudo-disbelief written across your face. “Ben Solo, did you just kiss me?”

He hummed. “I’d hardly call that a kiss.” His voice was low—almost hoarse—yet his words were like silk to your ears. His amber eyes flicked between your lips and your wide eyes, the intensity of his stare nearly suffocating. “And how do you know my last name?”

“A good question for another time.”

Another pause. An agonizingly long lull hung between you as you sat completely still, your chests rising and falling rhythmically. A moment of near clarity, in which you condemned yourself for feeling this way. But it passed just as quickly as it came. Rationality was replaced by desire, a need burning through your chest like a branding iron upon flesh. What little logic and reason remained in your mind was helpless in witnessing what you were about to do.

Your lips collided with his, moving together fluidly as your hands wrapped behind his neck, pulling him down to you. Without a moment of hesitation, Ben leaned in, his free hand raking through your hair, gripping it gently as the arm that held you inched down to the curve of your spine, pulling you closer.

Relinquishing the touch of his lips, you pulled back, admiring the redness blooming throughout the delicate skin, the expanding darkness of his dilated pupils.

“How about that?” you asked, your erratic breath fanning over Ben’s glossy lips.

“Yeah, I’d say so,” he panted before chasing your lips again, his mouth moving fervently against yours.

His hand released its grip on your hair and fell to your hip, the other mirroring the movement. In one swift motion, he pulled you onto his lap, drawing a sharp inhale from your lips. Moving to straddle his hips, you slid onto his lap, dragging your hands from his neck from his chest for support. Ben didn’t protest, tightening his grip on your hips to guide you.

Neurons were firing faster than you could react, your body alight with energy at every delicate touch of his hands and lips. Ben groaned against your lips as you shifted your hips over his, creating a delicious friction between your bodies.

He kissed you greedily, passionately. With an intensity that could only exist in one’s dreams until this moment. Ben’s hands snaked up your waist, his fingers igniting the nerves beneath your robes, fueling the blossoming heat in your stomach.

“Ben,” you sighed against his lips, drunk on the endorphins coursing through you.

In what felt like a counterattack to the logic clawing its way back into your mind, he dragged your hips forward, his growing bulge pressing against your core.

“Mmm?” he hummed, not wanting to separate his lips from yours. His hands released their grip on your waist, running up your arms until they found your face, his rough palms cupping your cheeks.

Gathering the remnants of your willpower, you reluctantly pulled away from his lips. “We can’t…” you said weakly, studying how your fingers traced the seams of his robes in an effort to avoid his gaze.

“Can’t do what?” Ben asked, gently smoothing a thumb over your cheeks.

“Jedi can’t do this.” Your eyes found his, your heart aching as you did.

He parted his lips to speak, but the words fell silent on his tongue. “I know,” he sighed, the same heartache evident in his tone. His fingers fell from your face, coming to rest on your shoulders. “What do we do?”

The answer should have been simple: we don’t. We don’t break the Jedi Code. We don’t risk getting kicked out of the Academy. And we don’t foster these feelings.

“We could find a way to make it work.” The words leaving your mouth were just as much of a surprise to you as they were to Ben. “We’ll keep it a secret.”

“It would be difficult, especially with the tight-knit group we have here.” And here you thought that you were supposed to be the voice of reason between the two of you.

“There’s a possibility of someone finding out. We could get kicked out.” Lifting your hips to climb off of his lap, you sat back down in your spot beside him, folding your legs up to your chest. You rested your chin on your knees as you stared into the fire before you, sparks shooting off of the flames as the charred wood hissed and popped. “Is that a risk you’re willing to take? Especially as the Master’s nephew?”

Ben inhaled deeply, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “To be honest, I can’t think of a better reason to get expelled than this.” His hand found yours, his fingers weaving between yours in a tight grasp. “We’ll be okay,” he soothed, your name falling from his lips as his thumb rubbed your hand reassuringly.

You turned to face him, searching for any sign of insincerity, finding none. “Nobody—and I do mean nobody—can know.”

Ben nodded in agreement, a lock of dark hair falling from its place into his face. “I promise–”

“That means no more talking to Tai and Hennix about me.” You jabbed a finger into his arm to assert your point. “They heckled me about it today at lunch.”

He laughed. “Okay, okay, I take full responsibility for that. In my defense though, I wasn’t aware that these feelings were reciprocated, so I didn’t see the harm in talking about my crush with my friends.”

The electricity in your heart stalled for a moment. “Yeah, well, the feelings are mutual. So, you need to cut it out. Like now. That’s an order, Solo,” you commanded, your tone equal parts playful and serious.

“Yes, your highness.” Ben bowed his head, earning a punch to his bicep from you.

“Smartass,” you said as you stood from the ground, walking over to grab the tray of bocha. “Thanks for dinner, by the way.”

Ben followed your lead, taking his robe down from its place, the material still obviously soaked. “Anytime, princess.”

After a moment of wrestling with the wet cloak, he pulled the hood over his head and he leaned down, planting a warm kiss on your forehead. “I’ll come by tomorrow night to pick you up for training. Until then, try to get some sleep.”

“Says the insomniac.” You rolled your eyes as you pulled a wobbly stool over to eat your meal.

He let out a puff of air through his nostrils, the smirk on his lips growing. “Look who's being a smartass now,” he said as he pulled the door open, the familiar sound of rain spilling into the hut. “Sleep tight.”

“You too, Ben.”

In the haze of the rainfall and protection of dark robes, he disappeared into the night, leaving you with just the crackling fire as company.

A/N: I hope you guys are enjoying the story so far! These next few chapters were so much fun to write, I can't wait for you guys to read them!! I will be trying to edit and upload chapter six by the 12th, but the following week I'll be in Disneyland (seeing our favorite space boy!) and the week after that, I'll be taking my NCLEX. Sooo, sadly I need to focus on preparing for that first. If I have time to edit chapter seven, I'll upload it when I can. Otherwise, expect it to be posted sometime after June 27th :) Okay, sorry for the long note, ily all! -C ♡

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