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girlbossblackbeard · 7 months

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s2 ep3 delirious ramblings in honor of eps 4 and 5 coming soon!!

you already KNOW wtf goin on !!!

-the red flag fleet pig tails absolutely slay every single time

-Zheng Yi Sao putting her arm out to shield Olu from the dying guy that just got stabbed has me feeling some typa way (falling in love with her)

-stede just pushing his little bar and charcuterie cart around im obsessed

-Zheng Yi Sao's customer service voice when she says "Hi! I'm Zheng Yi Sao, you're...John?" like she's cold-calling someone is absolutely top tier, I would give her all my money if she were calling to scam me

-"champers?" stede you absolute doofus i love him far too much

-Zheng Yi Sao being all coy with her "ohh...forget it...;)" stop!!!!! im already in love with you please stop this madness!!!!!! i can't take much more of it!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-OLU'S OFFENDED FACE WHEN STEDE JUST PLOPS THE TOWELS DOWN ON ZHENG YI SAO'S DESK LMAO

-okay. we have to talk about stede hearing "the revenge" and his mind going completely blank aside from the one thought of "Ed" replaying over and over and over again to the point that all sense of self-preservation flies completely out the window (as he flies over the side of the ship) because the ONLY thing that matters to him in that moment is seeing Ed again. i can only imagine the looming sense of doom he must've felt as he realized Ed was noticeably absent from the rest of the crew when he found them, and then the cagey way they all spoke about where Ed went. i wonder if seeing Ed's body lying on that table gave him any sense of relief in the way that getting confirmation of something you'd feared was coming finally arrives

-also!!! let's talk about what must have started running through Olu's mind when he realized it was their ship!! did he immediately think of Jim? was he worried about them? did he assume they would've escaped blackbeard's clutches by now and gone on to bigger and better things?

-"she's returned to us...mostly" i wonder how sad buttons must have felt seeing the revenge in such a dire state :((

-"maybe she's gone through that triangle thing by bermuda" wee john my beloved

-I TOLD Y'ALL WHEN THAT MF GNOSSIENNE NO. 5 HITS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT WAS GONNA BE THE DEATH OF ME !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND IT VERY NEARLY WAS BITCH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-oh holy fuck the way the look of excitement on stede's face morphs into a look of horror as he takes in just how wrecked the revenge got in the storm is extremely upsetting

-someone smarter than me needs to do a deeper analysis on the use of gnossienne no.5 as stede is climbing the ladder of the revenge, no doubt with thoughts of a beautiful and loving reunion with ed because surely he'll be there waiting for him, just as overjoyed to see stede as stede is to see him, only for the song and that fantasy to abruptly get cut off once stede realizes how dire the situation on the revenge has gotten

-hey fam do we think there's any significance of the crew being found desecrating that seagull in the captain's quarters or was that just a plot convenience thing bc obviously stede would check the captain's cabin for ed first

-"just thought you'd be taller...mu-muscly, you know...charismatic" bruh ain't NO way Certain People had been either 1) talking about stede in such a high regard it put him up on a massive pedestal or 2) ahem....sobbing so loudly the entire god damn ship can hear it every single night for literal months...that archie fully thought stede MUST have been basically a god amongst mortals to make ed be so downbad it drove him to violent insanity

-"why can't i get a straight answer from any of you" because they're all gay bitch!!!!! you knew this when you first hired them!!!!!!

-OBSESSED with how Izzy is fully down an entire leg and Stede could NOT give less of a shit about it. Literally telling him "Piss off Izzy, I don't wanna hear from you" as if there isn't the biggest possible elephant on the deck basically screaming to be talked about

-side note: for the love of GOD con o'neill looks so stupidly hot in his reaction shot to stede telling izzy to piss off it's actually gonna give me heart palpitations. this is my formal petition to make con o'neill look permanently just a little bit damp and a little bit sad

-"when you get old, if you don't wanna work anymore you can just give up i guess" frenchie my beloved

-love love love love love the parallels between buttons and auntie being the actual paragon of first mates with almost preternatural senses for mutiny a'brewin or the sea shifting

-hey fam do we think izzy actually stabbed stede's painting or was it really ed and izzy was...sparing stede's feelings???? but why??? is it because he's intimately aware of how it feels to lose ed and even though he hates stede (or used to) he still wouldn't wish that kind of pain on anyone??

-SORRY I GOTTA TOOT MY OWN HORN FOR A SECOND BECAUSE I CALLED IT FROM THE MOMENT THE TEASER DROPPED THAT THE RAG MAN WAS GONNA BE HORNIGOLD'S GHOST MANIFESTING AS THE PARTS OF ED HE HATED THE MOST

>>>it turned out to be all parts of himself which did me quite a big ouchie but im still riding the high of having sussed that out so early on im LITERALLY destined to be a writer on this show. djenks get at me i know ur reading this

-i have absolutely no idea what the pig is supposed to symbolize in ed's fever dream someone who has a functioning brain should figure it out and let me know pls & thx

-don't know if this is significant symbolism or not, but: ed is wearing the cravat, his chains, and the pearl necklace in the storm. he is NOT wearing the cravat or the chains in the fever dream, but he IS still wearing the pearls. the best analysis i can do around that rn is that the cravat symbolizes stede and this journey he's about to go on needs to be about Ed and Ed alone, but also Ed *feeling* and *thinking* he's genuinely alone, which is supported by the conversation he has with hornigold later when he reveals he's worried there's no one waiting for him in the real world. the chains im thinking could symbolize his blackbeard persona in a way - presumably he got the gold chains when plundering and gaining/maintaining his reputation for being ruthless and the chains are a physical reminder of that persona and reputation. in the fever dream, ed is stripped down to his most vulnerable state (which is interesting considering his hair and beard aren't in line with the s1 symbolism of his vulnerability - almost as if his heartbreak over stede has become so all-encompassing he's no longer able to hide it behind a beard or face-shielding long hair) so the chains would disappear just as his blackbeard reputation would disappear in order for him to get to the core of who he really is, which brings us to: the pearl necklace. we could literally talk for hours about the nuances of everything the pearl necklace represents regarding ed's fears, desires, identities, hopes and dreams for the future, childhood trauma, etc. etc. etc. but ultimately it represents the parts of ed he holds the closest to his chest and THAT is why he's still wearing it in the fever dream: because it's a representation of who he truly is, stripped down, at his core. and THAT is the person who needed to go on this journey in order to start to heal, without the influence of anyone or anything else making him feel the need to perform or be anything other than his 100% authentic, vulnerable self.

-the way i reacted to seeing how beautiful ed is as he's waking up in hornigold's hut is undeniable proof that i need to be put down

-"what did you do to me...while i was out...anything weird?" edward teach my beloved of all time. we will not be taking this incredibly funny and perfectly performed line delivery and making it sad by thinking about the implications of what past behaviors ed may have experienced from other shipmates when waking up after a night of blacking out

-sorry but the way ed holds his breath so he doesn't eat the soup is so hilarious and adorable to me

-auntie recounting all the details of the mutiny right down to ed's height and silver hair based off of looking at the deck and licking some gun powder is sooooooo sherlock holmes coded but like. if he fucked y'know?

-also!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the little sprinkle of what i believe was maori thrown in between auntie and fang!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i need more of that IMMEDIATELY

-"i'm burnin up here" SICK jobros reference frenchie

-frenchie stopping himself from saying "oh fuck" and instead going with "oh shit tits" i love this man an unhealthy amount

-"it's called you-cal-lip-eh-tusses. you-calamitous." good god i would due for olu in a heartbeat

-okay so. my thoughts on the olu/zheng/jim/archie situation. i never posted this here when the trailer dropped bc i thought i was just going crazy but when i saw the olu/jim shoulder bump i immediately knew it was giving "exes who are still friends and are being supportive of the other person when they admit they've found someone new" vibes. THAT BEING SAID - i can see this whole thing being resolved in 2 ways: either they have jim and olu talk it out and officially decide to split to pursue their respective new flames while remaining best friends/family, or - and this is where i think we all hope this is going - we get a 4-way polycule. im 50/50 on whether the studio would greenlight that given they've already pushed the envelope with having a nonbinary character and basically everyone is gay, but at the same time i would hope the studio would recognize that the show was wildly successful due in large part to those key elements and would be in favor of pushing the envelope even further (in their eyes). i think jim and archie are gonna see zheng being an absolute badass and fall in love with her and zheng is gonna see jim and archie being absolute badasses and fall in love with them while already being in love with olu specifically because he's NOT a badass and olu's gonna admit he's still in love with jim and they're all gonna live happily ever after completely dominating the seas and killing colonizing dipshits :)

-OLU WHIPPING HIS HEAD AROUND TO LOOK BACK AT JIM WHEN THEY TELL HIM THEY SAW ARCHIE'S BOOBS LMAO

-hi it's me again here to say that it is STILL SO EXTREMELY FUCKED UP AND EVIL OF DAVID JENKINS AND CO. TO BE PLAYING GNOSSIENNE NO.5 WHILE STEDE LOOKS DESPONDENTLY AT THE RUINED REMAINS OF HIS CAPTAINS QUARTERS WHERE HE AND ED CONNECTED FOR THE FIRST TIME AND FELT LIKE SOMEONE FINALLY UNDERSTOOD THEM

-how the fuck did izzy on a crutch and a pegleg sneak up on stede in the captain's quarters lil homie HAS to be sounding like mr. krabs at this point

-"i think the knives really help bring the place together" he literally cannot physically bring himself to not be a bitch around izzy even when he's wallowing in his lost love i am so so so obsessed with him you have no idea

-i know we're all still reeling from the confirmation that stede has ALWAYS known ed - past the rose-colored glasses of falling in love with just the idea of someone - and how his mind works when he asks izzy point blank what they did to ed but. i cannot stop thinking about s1 ed not being able to look stede in the eye as he says "you were always gonna realize what i am" before leaving with calico jack because he was so terrified of the judgement he'd see in stede's eyes. he revealed a less-than-ideal (but comparatively pretty benign) part of himself to the person whose opinion he cares about the most and was too afraid to stick around to see if/when stede would finally reject him for not living up to the standards that ed thinks stede deserves. and yet. we now know with actual proof that stede not only never judged ed for his past and just kinda glossed over any erratic behavior/violent reactions during their time together in favor of keeping an idealized image of ed in his mind, stede understood ed on a deeper level than practically anyone else in the whole world, with the exception of izzy, ever did. stede was so intimately aware of the exact kind of person ed was and what his thoughts and behavioral patterns were that he knew without a shadow of a doubt that there were only two fates for ed if stede didn't reach him in time: he was either gonna watch the world burn or die trying.

-feeling BIG emotions over the almost-sigh that stede does when izzy tells him how ed took his leg for merely mentioning stede's name. the way he looks away and swallows down his guilt and grief and shame.

-"you sent him to doggy heaven" ohhhh my god i wanna know if stede was bracing himself for the heartbreak or the relief (or both!!) of hearing izzy say yes. as i mentioned above, stede had to have had a cloud of impending doom looming over him all these months wondering where ed is and worrying if he'll ever find him again, and that cloud must have only gotten infinitely darker when he found the crew on the revenge only to realize that ed wasn't with them. stede isn't stupid, he proved as much when he told izzy he knew ed was going to destroy everything around him or die in the process, and with ed being very noticeably absent it would only make sense for stede to jump to the worst-case-scenario of the crew having to kill ed before he killed all of them. i think he had probably been emotionally preparing himself for that outcome the second he noticed the crew being shifty about ed's whereabouts, so to get confirmation of it would obviously be genuinely heartbreaking but also an end to the sense of doom that had been hanging around him for a while.

-the way stede whips his head around to look at izzy when izzy tells him no, they didn't send ed to doggy heaven is so! heartbreaking! because you can see the instant flame of hope light up his face for a split second before he reads the profound sadness of izzy's expression as he tells stede they deserted him on a beach and left nature to do the rest. interestingly enough, stede doesn't seem at all reassured or renewed in his hope by this, and im wondering if he knows izzy is lying to him at that point to spare his feelings

-"yeah i was there. that cabin boy's name was felix. he was a really nice guy" i love that we're not only getting a crumb of lore about ed's past on hornigold's ship (that isn't frat-bro posturing with calico jack) but that the crumb we do get highlights ed's humanity. not only does he remember the name of a "lowly" cabin boy, but he remembers that the cabin boy was really nice and is angry that he died so senselessly and hornigold doesn't even seem to care

>>>>>hmmmm now im thinking about how hornigold is a representation of the parts of ed that he hates, so is hornigold's story an allegory for how ed hates how he's shut off his emotions/shown little to no remorse for the hurt and suffering he's caused during his breakup era?

-okay there are SO many mentions of soup this season already someone figure out wtf it's supposed to mean

-THE WAY MY FRIENDS AND I ACTUALLY SCREAMED WHEN ZHENG SAYS "Girl, how are you :(" TO STEDE LIKE THIS SHOW IS 100% CONFIRMED WRITTEN FOR THE GIRLS (gn) AND THE GAYS AND EVERY LINE IS PERFECT

-DAVID JENKINS. WHY. ARE YOU PLAYING. GNOSSIENNE NO.5. WHILE STEDE TELLS ZHENG. ABOUT HOW HE FEELS LIKE HE LET ED DOWN. AND THAT HE'S THE CAUSE OF A LOT OF THIS. AND HOW HE SHOULD'VE JUST TOLD ED HOW HE FEELS. BUT HE WAS SCARED. AND NOW HERE WE ARE. i want you psychologically evaluated because i do believe there is a dark evil inside of you

-PLEASE stede's reaction of basically "ya got me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯" to Zheng saying the guys on wanted posters are hot makes my brain fizz

-im not ashamed to say i literally get tears in my eyes from how divine ed looks when he's talking to hornigold about selling handmade shoes like what the fuck did the hair and makeup artists DO to make him even more stunning than before when they had already broken the scale in s1???????????? i feel like i should send them a thank-you care package for the gift they've given us

-"im actually just a very simple man" my sweet precious baby darling eddie boy. you are the most complex character i have ever become obsessed with in my entire life, and i was DEEP in the Castiel trenches at the height of SuperWhoLock tumblr from 2012 - 2014 as an unmedicated teenager still developing her prefrontal cortex.

-"like a jailer, but all the prisoners like you and they can go whenever they want" so what im hearing is ed likes having control over other people but also desperately wants them to like him AND choose to stay with him of their own free will and not because they have to. or it's just a funny simile for an inn like he said :)

-the jeff's inn by the sea roleplay scene makes me so insane i actually can't talk about it rn other than to say it's peak comedy and i want it permanently etched into my brain. also ed's little corsage makes me [feral shrieking]

-GODDD the way this season is so expertly slicing in clips from s1 as a quick flash of an image before coming back to the present is so extremely satisfying and also a direct punch to the solar plexis every time

-"grown man covered in tattoos, eh? with daddy issues?" no comment just screaming

-"we've been living second-to-second for a while now. it's actually kinda nice to have a deadline" this!!! this is what im talking about with the looming sense of impending doom hanging over you for so long that once you get confirmation that it's going to be over soon, even if it's because of a very permanent ending, there's a lot of relief that can be wrapped up in that

-"go on, bonnet. gimme your worst" i feel like i don't have the brain capacity rn to break that interaction down and tease out what izzy would've been expecting stede to do or say and what stede would've been thinking in that moment that was too overwhelming to actually voice but maybe someday i'll get to it

-"okay well i feel like im gonna choose...i feel like im supposed to choose...live" bbbbbbbbbrrrrrrrrrrooooooooooo the intentional writing of ed to say "gonna" at first and then switching it to "supposed to" is sooooooooo insane dude holy shit. i need to know what factors caused him to change his wording. what was he going to say he was gonna do. who or what is pressuring him to make him feel like he's supposed to choose to live. are those two choices - what he was gonna do vs. what he feels like he's supposed to do - at war with each other or is the conflict brewing from the different motivations behind wanting to live vs. feeling like you're supposed to live. the writing is just too good

-godddd someone needs to make a post on hornigold telling ed they're in a judgement-free zone which is basically ed reminding himself that his mind is a safe space for his thoughts and how unbelievably sad it is that ed would even need to remind himself of that in the first place. he's so used to scrutiny and judgement (and it's one of his biggest fears when it comes to the people he cares about the most) that he doesn't even think he's free from it in his own head

-im just gonna say it. ed talking about warmth and intercourse and orgasms is foreshadowing

-"i don't think anyone's waiting for me" i'll actually go lie in the middle of the road right now i swear to god

-it's so interesting how ed gets angry that his fear that no one is waiting for him fucks his pros up

-i don't understand how olu didn't immediately clock that zheng was flirting with him when he's in her office like buddy if i see a very beautiful woman with a very sharp sword and she's pointing it in my direction? that's a marriage proposal

-HOKAYYYY FOLKS WE GOTTA TALK ABOUT OUR FIRST TRUE COMPETENT!STEDE SIGHTING IN THIS EP. he not only devises an escape plan ALL BY HIMSELF, he has the knowledge and foresight to . and guess what? IT ACTUALLY. WORKED. in fact, it was a SWEEPING success where he got EVERYONE safely off the red flag ship and onto his own!!!! this wasn't just some raid won with brute force or a fuckery accomplished due to loony tunes rules, this was an honest-to-god escape plan that required learning the shifts of the guards on deck and at the entrance to the brig to ensure those spaces would be as empty as possible, knowledge of the sleepy-time effects of chamomile in concentrated forms, knowledge of the layout of the ship he's been on for, what? a few days? maybe a week?, knowledge of where they store their weapons and then figuring out how to use the crossbow as a zipline AND remembering to have someone cut the line to prevent any red flag crew from boarding the revenge, figuring out how they can use towels to use said zipline, remembering that the revenge no longer has a wheel and utilizing wee john's strength to secure them a new one while disabling the red flag ship thus greatly increasing their chances of a successful escape. i guess now we know what the hell is going on in towels (it's scheming and plotting)

-jim grabbing archie's hand has they leave the brig

-stede's little hand gesture and "sss" noise he makes to communicate to lucius and black pete they're gonna move forward now even though they're all physically so close it literally would've been quieter if he just whispered his directions to them

-the person at the wheel looking longingly up into the sky. how much do we wanna bet she was thinking about zheng

-"just breathe into it black pe-" WHY ARE THEY SHUSHING MY BOY BUTTONS HE'S RIGHT

-"oy, ya cockeyed -" STOP SILENCING HIM

-"aye look at that, see that black pete -" LET HIM SPEAK

-IZZY PUSHING BUTTONS'S HAND DOWN AS HE'S TELLING BLACK PETE TO OBSERVE ARCHIE'S SHOOTING FORM IS EVERYTHING TO ME

-wee john profusely apologizing to the person he knocked unconscious before knocking them unconscious and then again after stealing their wheel. he is so dear to me

-i genuinely love how buttons wastes NO time in assuming his first mate duties again and directing frenchie and roach to start preparing the ship for sailing. it's just a nice reminder that stede chose him as his first mate for a reason beyond his propensity to attract a motley crew of unique characters - buttons is a genuinely highly skilled, highly competent, and extremely dedicated and hard working sea farer. who may or may not actually be a sea witch that has taken on the form of a humble man

-i actually am very charmed by olu still trying to persuade zheng to spare the lives of his friends while they're making out

-ooooohhhhh the fact that olu had to choose between zheng and jim was such a delightful mini conflict to see him go through. i might wind up making a post about his thoughts and motivations in that moment later on because it's so quick but so profound

-okay 1) the raw emotions in zheng's yell when she sees olu escaping on the revenge literally gave me goosebumps. 2) the look of absolute betrayal on her face in that closing shot gave me even MORE goosebumps. 3) ALWAYS LISTEN TO YOUR SLIGHTLY SUPERNATURAL FIRST MATE Y'ALL THEY ALWAYS KNOW WHAT'S UP

-i can't wait to see how this betrayal plays out in terms of the red flag fleet being an enemy to the revenge, even though we know it's temporary since we've seen Zheng Yi Sao and her fleet fighting alongside ed and stede in the s2 trailer and in the promotional materials for upcoming episodes

-UHHHH STEDE'S HEARTBROKEN FACE AS THEY'RE LEAVING HELLO?????????????????????????????????

-izzy trying to genuinely thank stede is so. Character Arc.

-also archie and jim training/fake sword fighting in the background

-"clarity? you've made your choice" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

-ed realizing that he really just hates himself is going to be MY villain origin story

-what the HELL was up with hornigold doing that howl. hated that

-"i'm not loveable" "and you're scared to do anything about it" i swan to john im gonna start chewing on the steel cables that hold up suspension bridges you literally cannot do this to me right now

-hey so fun fact when kate bush's song kicked in i actually desperately wished someone would've given me one of those neat chamomile towels that makes you pass out instantly because :) i am wholly unequipped :) to hear that song :) in the context of this next scene :))))

-seriously if you haven't read the lyrics to that song yet, first contact your local veterinarian's office and schedule and appointment to be put down whenever their next available time is, then look up the lyrics

-stede calling him a nut again i literally

-UGH the CONFLICT you can see on stede's face when deciding whether or not to remove the fabric covering ed's head or not. does he want to remove the fabric so he can say one final goodbye, face to face? or does he want to leave the fabric on so his last image of ed in his memory will be when he's alive and excited at the prospect of running away with stede?

-the fact that stede is literally pulling the wool from over ed's eyes and waking him back up both physically and spiritually(???)

-like ed, who was resigned to his fate and at peace with his choice to sink into the depths and never wake up again, INSTANTLY finds the motivation to live the SECOND stede interacts with him and he starts fighting as hard as he can to return to the surface, and just when he thinks he's not strong enough and he'll succumb to the darkness anyway, a light appears to pull him back from the brink. stede's voice comes through begging ed to wake up, to come back to him, don't die please don't die, he's here now. and ed's face as he's hearing stede talk to him is so full of love and amusement and admiration and then a little confusion as mermaid!stede appears but goes right back into his fully smitten expression and longing gaze and i just. don't know how we were ever expected to recover from this.

-THEY WERE ACTUALLY SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO CRAZY TO JUST THROW THE GOD DAMN GENTLEBEARD/BLACKBONNET SEASON 1 BEST MOMENTS MONTAGE AT US LIKE THAT WITH NO WARNING DURING AN ALREADY EXTREMELY EMOTIONALLY TAXING SCENE

-anyway i am both irreparably broken inside and also reborn from this episode. thank you alyssa lane and alex sherman and also i will never forgive you for this

#ofmd #our flag means death #blackbonnet #gentlebeard #ofmd s2 #edward teach #stede bonnet #ofmd s2 spoilers #izzy hands #zheng yi sao

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avastyetwats · 4 months

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Bloody Heaven

Continued from here. @izzyeffinhands

Stede wasn't necessarily surprised that Izzy had been covered in blood, it was to be expected, of course, given they were raiding a ship and taking the lives of those that dared fought back. Things were bound to get messy, but he is quite sure Israel hasn't been covered in blood quite like this before. And it was quite the arousing sight. Not to mention combined with his physical strength and precise accuracy, as well as his confidence and bravery. He's been doing this for years, so of course he's experienced in every way. He's one of the most feared, yet respected, pirate - the other half of Blackbeard - and everyone knows of the name Israel Hands. But getting to see him in action never fails to amaze and arouse the Captain. Especially with the thought of 'he's mine' flowing through his head. As he runs his sword clean through the dying man's chest.

Oh, my.

"You most certainly are, Israel." He responds, voice flirtatious and excited and his eyes holding a dreamy gaze within. Never did Stede Bonnet think he'd find the sight of Israel Hands covered in blood sexy and arousing. And it was only because it was Israel that Stede found it to be so. There was stirring beneath his own trousers as he stood there before him, completely clean, though only on the outside. If only he knew the thoughts his Captain was having of him in this moment.

He hadn't seen the beginning of the raid, but he saw enough as be boarded the ship and his eyes were glued to his beloved, drinking him from head to toe. His sweat, the other men's blood, his arms flexed, chest heaving from his panting - oh, Stede bet his chest was covered in sweat beneath those leathers, chest hair flattened against his skin as a result and the droplets of blood sliding down his neck making their way to those glorious tits of his, and those strong hands covered in blood, one holding the cutlass tight reminding Stede of that same hand around his throat and...fuck.

He could only imagine how he'd look naked like this. He was currently undressing him with his eyes and--

"Captain!"

The loud shout from next to him startles the man from his inappropriate thoughts, jumping where he stood before he turns to the one responsible. Lucious.

"What!?" He wasn't angry, just startled. Maybe a little annoyed. Forgetting where they even were and what they were doing.

Lucius sighs. He knows exactly what just transpired here. Gods, they were so disgustingly horny all the time and sometimes at the most of inappropriate times. He's honestly surprised they hadn't started fucking yet. "...we're raiding a ship... that fired at us first." He reminds him, clenching the notebook to his chest.

Stede's eyes widen, face flushing. "Ah, yes! Right. Er.." He clears his throat and turns back to his crew, doing his damnedest to look at all of them and not just Izzy. It wasn't without difficulty though. "The Captain!" He remembers. "Where is the Captain of this ship?" He had half a mind to order his crew to find him... except for Izzy just so he could look at him a little longer, but any longer and they'd find themselves in the closest, empty room... or perhaps he's join Izzy in the hunt, but that would likely end them in the same position anyway. Against the wall, on the floor, over a desk...

Focus, Bonnet! He scolds himself, his eyes having landed on Izzy again when thinking those very tempting thoughts.

#instead of 'bloody hell' it's bloody heaven hehe #i'm clever sometimes xD #this is so funny #i had to throw lucius in there LMAO #c; stede bonnet #izzyeffinhands

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sassygwaine · 1 year

Note

For the character ask thing- Stede, of course :)

hell yes okay this took me a while i have a LOT of thoughts abt this guy

favorite thing about them

WHERE DO I START

he’s a total bitch and he’s the softest lil guy in the world, he picked flowers and wanted to marry for love, he’s gnc as fuck and is absolutely nutter butters, he feels a lot and very deeply and doesn’t know what any of the things he’s feeling are

he’s just like me fr

least favorite thing about them

total lack of consideration for other people as people!! even when he attempts to operate in service of other people, he bases his actions on assumptions rather than evidence, and ends up hurting people instead. the type of self-absorbed you can only be when you hate yourself.

favorite line

hi all!!

changed my fucking vocabulary

also “oh my god, i’m not a pirate, i’m an idiot!”

brotp

the stede & lucius & olu friendship trio is lovely

also i REALLY love the idea of mary & stede as friends and coparents (really only works in fan works, i don’t expect or anticipate it in canon)

otp

YOU ALREADY KNOWWWWW

blackbonnet, gentlebeard, ed/stede

notp

i’m gonna be real with y’all i don’t vibe with stede/ed/izzy or stede/izzy

random headcanon

i meannn you can pry autistic stede headcanon from my cold dead hands i will say that

unpopular opinion

i’m tired of posts talking about how stede sucks. we know. it’s literally the plot of the first four episodes! (arguably the entire show is stede is so bad at this and also occupying a space he doesn’t understand how to actually navigate bc he’s thrust himself into this world that was created because of people like him (societally, not specifically)) so idk i guess it’s just like ‘yes we know all of this and you spent hundreds of words talking abt it??? okay i guess’

song i associate with them

runaway goliath by mantaraybryn

'Cause you just wanna run away

While I’ll just stay and fight

Can you just be more brave

To fall from such a height

favorite picture of them

okay so i have had this image saved on my phone for a few months and i forget where i saved it from

however, reverse image search places it to a t-shirt design by @/general.caronobi on tiktok/insta

if that’s not the original credit somebody pls tell me

[ID: a three wolf moon style image with three stede faces: french party look, excited smile when the crew backs him in front of the firing squad, and when jackie holds a knife to his nose]

#ty friend :33 #ask game #i love this blorbo so much #asks

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cheers-mdears · 2 years

Text

doesn't matter

ship: Edward/Stede

words: 875

rating: mature

tags: masturbation, heavy angst, hurt no comfort, post-break up, pre-kraken, season 1 spoilers

summary: Ed morosely speculates on what went wrong and cries and jerks off on the clothing Stede left behind just like he did Ed. (Not crack despite how that sounds) AO3 link

A/N: I tried to write Ed as drunk but have never been so much as tipsy myself so am basing it on what I've seen in movies and stuff, sorry

Ed's shoulder jars against the solid shelving while reaching for the little suit doll. Fuckin'...mannequin? Lever. Definitely a lever or something. Closet opener. Like a can opener except for closets. This closet. Secret closet, that Stede only shared with him.

The lever finally holds still enough for Ed to pull it and open the hidden door. He cusses and swats at the weight that almost fucking brains him on the other side of the door when he closes it behind himself. Things really need to stop having it out for him. He's just... just trying to see the closet. All the pretty clothes.

There's sunlight like the first time he was in here and he remembers for a moment how excited they'd been. Peas in a pod. Stede happy to share, Ed fasci-- fas-- interested. A lot. The orange breeches they'd both worn had come from here. That had been the first time forrrfuckingever that Ed had been unbored.

He stumbles while trying to find orange fabric and tries to catch himself again, but the stupid clothes aren't solid like the shelves and he hits the floor hard, taking a couple useless summer linens down with him.

"Fuckin' ow."

Oh no. Ed fumbles at the shirts, checking for tears. If he's ruined them, Stede will be--

Stede won't be anything. Because Stede isn't here. It's been two days since Ed got here, plenty time for Stede to catch up. If he was coming. Which he's not. Why would he if he already left Ed behind once?

Ed blinks away the extra blur and turns to the winter jackets. If Stede isn't coming back, then Ed can do whatever the fuck he wants with his stuff.

The jackets are a bitch to yank down, but Ed has a nice big pile of fancy clothes fast enough. He runs his fingers over lace, embroidery, patterns, buttons, silk, velvet, linen that feels rough in contrast. He rubs an extra fancy stitched design over his wet cheeks and the beginnings of the first stubble he's had since his...teens? Twenties? Like at least half his life ago, however many years that was. He still feels cold.

Ed's been trying over and over and over and over again, but he can't figure out where he went wrong. If Stede didn't leave him to come back for his rich people things, what the fuck did he leave for? Had he remembered that Ed's a bad person, the worst, someone who killed their own dad? Or that he'd tried to kill Stede that one time? But they'd decided to forget about that and Ed would never--he'd rather chop off his own fuckin' dick than hurt Stede. Stede had to know that. Didn't he? Or maybe he'd finally saw that Ed will never fit him. Stede is sunshine and fun and nice things and Ed doesn't deserve any of that.

But Stede had kissed him back, Ed knows he did. And he'd said--

Ed drops face-first into the pile and hugs it tight.

Stede had said with his own mouth that Ed made him happy. So why--

Ed sniffs back snot and smells lavender and the cologne Stede had worn to the fickle fuckheads' party. He shoves his face in deeper and lets the building sob out. The headache that had settled behind his teeth earlier rushes back to his face.

Maybe it was because the kiss had been a weird angle? Cuz it had been, and it was Ed's fucking fault. Ed should have...should have climbed into Stede's lap like he'd wanted to a bunch of times, gotten as close as he could, found a better angle, and kissed him dizzy. Make sure he kissed Stede better than his wife ever had. He should have--fuck.

He pulls the clothes even tighter towards himself and wiggles his hips against them for friction as he imagines it. He should have laid Stede back and shown him how fuckin' good they could have been together. Nothing to slick the way and all the fucking sand meant buggering wasn't on the table, but Ed had gotten a lot of practice in his youth and could have sucked Stede until he saw goddamn stars. He could have found out what Stede's cum tastes like. He could have--shit.

The button of his pants snaps open easily--finally something doesn't fight him--and Ed has to lift his face from the clothes to gasp as he takes himself in hand and starts tugging.

He could have touched all over Stede's high-life soft skin and the scars from his recent adventures, kissed the sparse chest hair Ed had stared at while waiting for Stede's fever to break. He could have found out how Stede's prick fit against his palm.

He'd thought they'd have more time. Half-baked images of teaching Stede how to fuck Ed same as he'd been teaching him sword fighting mosey through his mind's eye and the pressure in his face builds into an awful throbbing ache as he nears climax. He thinks about the little cute-as-fuck noise Stede had made before Ed had ended the kiss and cums with a tear-stained cry.

He'd thought he'd have more time.

He'd thought--

Doesn't matter now.

#our flag means death #ofmd #ofmd fic #blackbonnet #blackstede #gentlebeard #indrid talks #indrid writes

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wildgreentide · 2 years

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More thoughts on OFMD 1.09

OK, I need to talk about the kiss and what follows it, because I have Many Thoughts. Here we go:

This scene is a lovely moment, and the noises I made during the kiss are probably inaudible to the human ear, but as tender as it is, it’s almost more bittersweet than romantic. Ed and Stede are so clearly on different levels here: Ed is all in. He’s made his choice, he’s sick of being a pirate, and he loves Stede and feels like life is more interesting with him around, so any future with him is what Ed wants.

Stede, on the other hand, isn’t there yet. He returns the kiss, but chastely, uncertain of what’s happening. I think we can be pretty certain that not only is it the first time he’s kissed a man, it’s the first time he’s ever kissed someone he had actual feelings for, even if he hasn’t yet figured out what those feelings are. And then not only is Ed kissing him, but he wants to make a plan to run away together, leave their old lives behind, and it’s just too much for Stede to take in right now. He’s already abandoned his family and his old life once, and the thought of doing it again doesn’t have the same appeal anymore.

Something else that’s going on in this scene is that Stede is realizing how much Ed has changed during their time together, largely because of him, and even though Ed seems happy with those changes, I think Stede misses the idea, the thrill, of Blackbeard the pirate. The beard is the obvious visual symbol of those changes, and Stede’s reaction to its loss is telling. Maybe some part of him is even wondering who Ed is if he’s not Blackbeard. Does it change how he feels about Ed? He’s still working that out. On top of that, he’s worried that he ruined Blackbeard – that his influence has somehow diminished him (a fear that Badminton will perpetuate when he confronts Stede later that night).

That’s a lot for him to carry around, in addition to the burden of having left his family, which is also sitting heavy on him right now. So the thought of leaving it all behind yet again, though it’s exciting and enticing, doesn’t feel right to him. Maybe he thinks it’s just another fantasy; maybe he thinks Ed has an image of him that he can’t live up to. Stede’s imagination is one of the best things about him – it’s part of what Ed loves about him – but he also recognizes when the fantasy has run its course, and I think he’s afraid that this new life Ed is proposing will all fall apart just like his last one did, that he’ll turn out to be a disappointment. (Also, let’s not forget: he hasn’t realized yet that he loves Ed!)

What makes it all the more bittersweet is that Ed doesn’t recognize Stede’s hesitation. He’s made his move, Stede has reciprocated genuinely, if not passionately, and that’s all that Ed needs to start putting his plan into action. He doesn’t see how conflicted Stede is, maybe because he’s caught up in the fantasy too.

They can’t see each other clearly. Not yet.

#local woman turns iconic gay kiss into total bummer: news at 11 #our flag means death #our flag means death spoilers #long post

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lunaicfantastic · 2 years

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walkin' the wire; pain and desire - ed teach in eagles songs

Tracklist:

1. Witchy Woman

2. Midnight Flyer

3. Doolin-Dalton

4. One of These Nights

5. New Kid in Town

6. Take It to the Limit

7. The Best of My Love

8. Desperado

9. Tequila Sunrise

10. Wasted Time

11. Pretty Maids All in a Row

12. Victim of Love

13. Outlaw Man

14. Doolin-Dalton / Desperado (Reprise)

selected lyrics and song explanations below the cut

this playlist was designed to loosely follow ed's arc through season one, so it is meant to be listened to in order but it's not required selected lyrics & brief song overview:

witchy woman: echoed voices in the night / s(he's) a restless spirit on an endless flight. represents how the world sees ed - he's the titular witchy wo(man), feared and/or desired by all of the pirate world and more of an urban legend than a man.

midnight flyer: a runaway team of horses ain't enough to make me stay / so throw your rope on another man and pull him down your way / make him into someone who can take the place of me / make him every kind of fool you wanted me to be. represents how ed feels at the beginning of the series - he wants to escape the life he has, which he finds meaningless and boring. he's tired of blackbeard, he wants to be ed, but it seems like he's the only one.

doolin-dalton: better keep on movin', doolin-dalton / 'til your shadow sets you free / if you're fast, and if you're lucky / you will never see that hanging tree. how ed feels before meeting stede - his life is dangerous and exciting but he finds no joy in it, he's treading water, moving forward only because there's no where else to go.

one of these nights: you got your demons, you got desires / well I got a few of my own / oooh someone to be kind to / in between the dark and the light / oooh coming right behind you / swear I'm gonna find you / one of these nights. ed's desire is to be loved, and to find someone to love, he wants someone to be kind to! he wants someone to love ed and not just blackbeard. basically his hopes for he and stede.

new kid in town: there's talk on the street, it's there to remind you / doesn't really matter which side you're on / you're walking away and they're talking behind you / they will never forget you 'til somebody new comes along. more of his feelings about the blackbeard persona ed feels like he has to embody - it was fun at first, to be a fearsome pirate, to have people run at the sight of his flag, but now it's just lonely and full of hollow victories.

take it to the limit: you know I've always been a dreamer (spent my life running 'round) / and it's so hard to change (can't seem to settle down) / but the dreams I've seen lately / keep on turning out and burning out / and turning out the same & and when you're looking for your freedom (nobody seems to care) / and you can't find the door (can't find it anywhere) / when there's nothing to believe in / still you're coming back, you're running back / you're coming back for more. more of ed's burnout but also a bit of the heartbreak from episode 8 - his dreams keep burning out and he keeps going with what he knows because he doesn't know what else to do.

the best of my love: every night I’m lyin’ in bed / holdin’ you close in my dreams / thinkin’ about all the things that we said / comin’ apart at the seams & I’m goin’ back in time and it’s a sweet dream / it was a quiet night and I would be all right / if i could go on sleeping. basically post-episode 9 ed, he's heartbroken and grieving, and feeling like he wasn't good enough for stede. essentially the first part of episode 10 in song form.

desperado: desperado / oh you ain't gettin no younger / your pain and your hunger / they're driving you home / and freedom, oh freedom / well that's just some people talking / your prison is walking through this world all alone & it's hard to tell the nighttime from the day / you're losing all your highs and lows / ain't it funny how the feeling goes / away. this song is pretty self-explanatory; the blackbeard persona is slowly devouring ed, the brutality and isolation is destroying him, he's gotta let somebody love him!

tequila sunrise: take another shot of courage / wonder why the right words never come / you just get numb / it's another tequila sunrise / this old world still looks the same / another frame. last half of episode 9 ed, the realization of stede standing him up at dawn and the numbness of that slow boat ride back to the ship. he thought he found a safe harbor, but he cracked up on the rocks.

wasted time: and you're back out on the street / and you're trying to remember, oh / how do you start it over / you don't know if you can / you don't care much for a stranger's touch / but you can't hold your man. ed's grieving his love for stede; he put himself out there, cut out his heart and laid it at stede's feet, and he thinks stede kicked it into the sea, that all his love was for nothing, so he's gonna bottle it up and let the kraken numb the pain for him.

pretty maids all in a row: and the storybook comes to a close / gone are the ribbons and bows / things to remember, places to go / pretty maids all in a row. ed's anger and frustration at himself for believing he could have love, that his story could have a happy ending - this isn't a storybook and when the fantasy falls away there's only heartbreak left behind.

victim of love: I heard about you and that man / there's just one thing I don't understand / you say he's a liar / and he put out your fire / how come you still got his gun in your hand? & some people never come clean / I think you know what I mean, oh / you're walkin' the wire; pain and desire / looking for love in between. he's trying to move on, to let the kraken take over, to kill ed and leave only blackbeard behind, but he can't manage to - he kept the lighthouse painting and the robe; behind the facepaint and the ruthlessness, ed's still there.

outlaw man: all of my friends are strangers / they quickly come and they go / and all my love's in danger / 'cause I steal hearts and souls / wo(man) don't try to love me / don't try to understand/ a life upon the road / is the life of an outlaw man. by the end of the season, he's trying to convince himself he's a monster, the kraken, something incompatible with love. no one should try to love him, because after all, who could love a monster and come away unscathed?

doolin-dalton/desperado (reprise): doolin-dalton / high or low, it's all the same / easy money and faithless wo(men) / you will never kill the pain & your twisted fate has found you out / and it's fin'lly turned the tables / stole your dreams and paid you with regret / desperado (is there gonna be anything left, is there gonna be anything?). essentially ed's state of mind at the end of the first season, empty, like he's lost everything and will never get it back, he's doomed to be alone and unloved for the rest of his life.

I hope y'all enjoy this playlist! ed is my poor little meow meow and i love to think about him suffering >:) (also just as a clarification these songs aren't meant to be accurate to the reality of ed's situation, but rather how he is experiencing it; we know stede loves him and is trying to get back to him but ed doesn't).

#ofmd #our flag means death #ed teach #blackbeard #stede bonnet #blackstede #stedebeard #sted #i have no clue what their ship name is tbh #shut up anna

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