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clown-owo · 3 months

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I love inventing terrible in universe fandom drama.

Gavintwt fell into a couple months of terrible discourse about Klavier’s sexuality. people argue about whether he's gay or just queerbaiting and then people argue about how this is invasive actually and real people can't queerbait and Klavier is just openly queer the whole time with a song literally titled "my boyfriend is the prosecution's witness". blissfully unaware.

There's a trend of Gavinner stans committing crimes or messing with crime scenes just to be prosecuted/called as a witness by Klavier. he has to put out a formal statement imploring his fans to pursue other methods of getting his attention:

just. please. stop. please.

A few years after the disbarment someone digs up an old viral post that's like

📖 tilthat February 15, 2018 TIL that during a case in 2016, a defense attorney cross-examined a parrot during the final day of court. The defense won the case. 🐢 tortise-law February 15, 2018 Sit your ass the hell down this motherfucker's name is fucking Phoenix Wright and you don't understand how fucking batshit that case is. He was defending prosecutor Miles Edgeworth, who he had previously DESTROYED THE PERFECT RECORD OF. And it STARTS with Wright proving a witness didn't actually see the murder because they were searching for the goddamned Loch Ness Monster. And not only that, the case ends with him ACCUSING THE OTHER PROSECUTOR, MANFRED VON KARMA, OF ORCHESTRATING THE WHOLE MURDER AND KILLING EDGEWORTH'S FATHER. AND HE WAS RIGHT???? LIKE???? 🎩 gay-ramarye February 16, 2018 holy shit reading this guy's wiki page is a fucking trip. not only does he have a perfect win record, that defendant immediately followed this up with FAKING HIS OWN DEATH??? spacejamminninja-deactivated2018 February 16, 2018 How is this not a tv show already. What the hell do you mean he faked his death 🪶 is-the-hawk-video-cute February 17, 2018 tbh if my defense attorney cross examined a parrot and accused the opposing counsel i'd fake my death too 🌸 pinkprincess February 18, 2018 japanifornia cases are just Like That i have never heard of a normal one.

and gavinblr suddenly realizes that that was the dude Klavier got DISBARRED a couple years ago. viral sensation parrot cross-examiner Phoenix Wright. the fandom goes crazy for a few days but then Klavier does a new photoshoot and they all move on.

A post joking about shipping Klavier’s brother with the guy Klavier got disbarred becomes a huge meme in gavinblr and a subsection begins writing ironic Krisnix RPF that progressively becomes genuine and then turnabout trump happens and the fandom explodes again. Half the Krisnix shippers jump ship to Klapollo because they felt weird about shipping a murderer (and did you SEE the Kitaki case? Klavier was sooo flirting with the defense <3). The other half doubled down and reveled in the angst potential. Part of the Klapollo shippers started truthing. They study court transcripts to prove that Klavier and Apollo are in love if not already dating. Unfortunately they’re right.

#Ace Attorney #AA #aa4 #aaaj #klavier gavin #kristoph gavin #phoenix wright #apollo justice #look away spout #og post #klapollo #aasocmed

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campyvillain · 1 year

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Recently I learned that Squimpus, the creator of the FNAF VHS series on Youtube, is a groomer. I say “is” because this is not an accusation. The reason I learned this to begin with is because they outright confirmed it in a group chat I was in. They used to be my best friend, and they kept all of this hidden from their other immediate friends for years. They befriended me as a minor, fully aware of their history of being inappropriate towards minors, and though they did not make any advances on me, I feel disgusted having ever known them all the same. At that time, there was no way I, or anyone else, could ever have known of the evil they were committing. As someone who knew them for a long time, I can confirm all of this is real. I will never be associated with them ever again, I will not allow them to linger in my life any longer. I mean it when I say they deserve to lose everything. Spread this post like wildfire. The public needs to know about this.

Here’s a link to my extended statement about this. Here’s a link to the proof in the form of a video, presenting all of the incriminating information against them as corroborated by immediate friends of theirs and the anonymous victim. Again, this is all real. We’ve been gathering info on this for multiple days now. If there’d be anyone to know if this was real or not, it’d be me.

Do not make any attempt to contact anyone involved in this situation, including me. Do not try to find out who the victim is, they have been kept anonymous for their own safety and privacy. Do not sensationalize this as some sort of drama or make it into a joke or a meme. We know they were an influential figure online so this is going to draw a lot of attention and there’s no way we can control the way people respond to this, but we all just want this to be over so we can move on with our lives. Give everyone affected by this the space and patience they need in a time like this. This is a god damn nightmare.

Thank you for your support.

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inevoblivia · 2 years

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Tag Dump Part I

#IC…[Princess of the Long Night] ♢#OOC…[Out of Time] ♢#Roleplay…[Awaiting Oblivion] ♢#Ask…[Sent from the Void] ♢#Meme…[A Distraction from Death] ♢#Crack…[Hitori-Sama’s Daily Absurdities] ♢#Headcanon…[Bestowed Knowledge] ♢#Drabble…[Pasts to be Forgotten] ♢#Lore…[Uncovered Truths] ♢#Gallery…[A Vision of the Dark] ♢#Mun’s Art…[An Image Adorned with Roses] ♢#Commentary…[Words Expressed Under Moonlight] ♢#Musing…[Mourning a Lost World] ♢#Aesthetic…[Jewels Beneath the Long Night] ♢#PSA…[Statement by the Nagaiyo Oujo] ♢#Starter Call…[A New Beginning] ♢#Inbox Call…[A New Friend or Foe] ♢#Open Starter…[The Beginning of the End] ♢#Promo…[Shimmeringly Diamonds] ♢#Self-Promo…[One Survivor of Death] ♢

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centrally-unplanned · 7 days

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If you find yourself asking "what even is the Biden campaign strategy", think back and realize you have watched zero of the dozens of ads he has released, listened to zero of his speeches, read zero of his statements from the White House, and so on. 100% of the information you get about Biden is from at best viral clips or w/e, and otherwise its other people, who do not work for his campaign, doing commentary, analysis, and probably memes and dunks. How would a candidate even begin to campaign to you? You don't want them to, you don't care.

Which is correct by the way, for you its all pointless. You actually should just look at his policy platform and make a decision in a day on whether or not it matches you enough. Or more importantly skip that step and vote for Biden no thoughts head empty because his opponent is Donald Trump this is not a debatable proposition why waste any time on it.

But hopefully that makes you realize A: how difficult campaigning is at all now, and B: how different a life the kind of people who *are* undecided about this are from you such that campaigning on them can actually reach them.

(And a bit of C: how inadequate the current political system is vis a vis the idea of consensus formation & civic engagement, but for another time)

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shizucheese · 3 months

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Okay okay okay, I need everyone to listen to me about this.

I know I kinda talked about this before in a reblog to someone else's post, but the idea has been rotating in my brain ever since and I feel like it needs to be further explored. A lot of people have been talking about the differences between TMA and TMP, and memeing about how people can actually quit the OIAR (which btw, I'll believe when I actually see it, by which I mean if we're able to get through the entire series without Teddy either coming back or turning up dead or otherwise facing "You can quit but you can never leave" levels of repercussions) but like nobody, from what I've seen, has been talking about what imo is the pretty glaringly obvious element at play here. So let's talk about the spider in the room, shall we? What do we know about the Magnus Institute in TMA?

People came there to give statements regarding their spooky experiences, including people who had doubts about doing so (because they weren't sure if the Institute was reputable, because they weren't sure if they believed what they had experienced, because they served a different entity so what reason would they have to do something for The Eye, etc).

The head archivist would ultimately become the Archivist, an Avatar of the Eye.

The Archivist's abilities included enabling statement givers to give their statements without going off track or leaving out details (we even see what happens when it's not the Archivist taking the statement), and being able to compel people to tell them things against their will, from statements to their darkest secrets.

You couldn't quit, at least not without gouging your eyes out.

The Magnus Institute was a part of the Eye.

Or was it? Because the other thing we know about the Magnus Institute is that the Web was using it as part of its plan to break free from the TMA world and gain access to the other worlds out there. How much of the compulsion aspects of the Institute-- people being drawn to the Institute to give statements, the Archivist's ability to draw statements and secrets out of people, people's inability to quit the Institute--was actually because of the Web? Where does the Eye's "compulsion to seek out knowledge even if it could be bad/ harmful" end and the Web's "not being in control of your own actions" begin? Was the Archivist--at least in the form Gertrude and John took--really purely an Avatar of the Eye? Or were they an Avatar of a mix between The Eye and the Web, much like how Martin, if he were to ever become a full fledged Avatar, likely would have been a mix of the Eye and the Lonely, just like his domain in S5 was? After all, Jonah was an Eye Avatar, was he not? And as far as we saw, he never needed to compel information out of people. He just Knew it (and used it to torment people).

One of the themes I've been playing around with in my TMA fanfictions since I first finished the podcast for the first time last winter is how the course of history would be different in the alternate worlds, where the Web wasn't interfering--at least not on the same scale, or for the same reasons--since it had already gotten what it wanted at the end of TMA. And I think that's exactly what we're seeing a version of in Protocol. I think the OIAR is what it looks like when it's entirely the Eye at play, with 0 interference from the Web. The Eye is all about having your secrets exposed, being watched, being followed. The tape recorders--something that would need to be turned off and on (controlled) in order to record something--were a tool of the Web. Now we're "witnessing" the events of the podcast through the audio from security cameras and other things that are constantly running; constantly seeing and listening without needing to be turned on and off. The statements aren't being given by people who somehow found their way to the institute and were on some level or another compelled to tell their tales. They're journal entries detailing a person's private thoughts. They're letters meant only for the eyes of the recipient, sharing secrets not meant for anyone else. They're recorded therapy sessions.

And the statements that are related to the Eye? The ones read in John's voice? They're forum and blog posts, which not only makes them the only ones whose sources didn't have the same expectation of privacy as the others, also ties them to the Web, since computers and websites were previously established as being associated with it.

#the magnus protocol #the magnus protocol spoilers #tmp #tmp spoilers #tmagp #tmagp spoilers #tma spoilers #shizu's red string board

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777bae · 1 year

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ROOKIE OF THE YEAR AWARD

PAIRING… f1!drivers x fem!driver | WC… 2.1k | Masterlist

Interview/comment clips… George, Alex, Lando, Y/n

“As you know I love a powerpoint presentation so today I’ve created a powerpoint to show you why I am rookie of the year.” George begins, waving his hand about enthusiastically as you sit in between Alex and Lando.

“I wouldn’t say I’ve got it in the bag, I mean…”

“So I thought I’d start with a photo of me probably overtaking Lando here.” He introduces.

“I’m pretty sure I’m lapping you there.” Lando exclaims as you and Alex try to stifle your laughter.

“Not sure, anyways. Fact one, most consistent qualifying position. Oh Alex, look at that. What’s that all about?” George cuts off the discussion before presenting a graph, not forgetting to take a dig at Alex’s downfall. You laugh as Alex and Lando begin to try to point out his errors and how he’s only been consistently last.

“As we know, in Formula 1, consistency is key.” He finishes, pointing a finger at you as you notice how much your data fluctuates.

“Fact two, Least amount of points behind teammate.” Russell presents his second graph, your result not being quite as bad as Lando’s as his goes into the 50s. “George Russell, one point, Lando Norris, 58 points behind his teammate.”

You laugh along with Alex as Lando only sits there, unable to come up with an answer.

“…”

“Fact three, most positions gained on opening laps.” He shows yet another graph whilst you immediately notice how low Lando and Alex are. “George Russell, two, Y/n Y/l/n, zero, Lando Norris has lost four and Alex Albon lost ten. What’s that all about mate?”

“Yeah but you started at the back.” You point out.

“You can’t lose positions when you start last.” Alex continued your point as you look at the producers of the video for help.

“Fact!” George exclaims whilst Alex still tries to reason his case. “I’ve qualified P19 before, I’ve had someone behind me.”

The video would quickly cut to your ‘interview’, your disappointed face being the only thing shown as you were unsurprised with George’s lack of evidence.

His statement causes you to immediately start laughing before Lando soon joins in, Alex still trying to prove his point in the back.

“Fact four, as we know Formula 1 is a lot about the cars.” The driver continues once you had all settled down. “2018 Formula 2 championship, fourth, Y/n Y/l/n, third, Alex Albon, second, Lando Norris, first George Russell, oh.”

Photos of the podium and George’s celebration began to flash on the screen before an enlarged ‘FACT’ appeared, an obama meme quickly following.

“I was surprised that Williams gave him the confidence to show that. If that’s what his presentations are then, uh, I expected more.”

“The were real, they were real facts.” George points out as he walks over to you all, his hands placed on his hips.

“Yeah, I feel like you were taking advantage…” Lando begins.

“Of your bad qualifying.” You finish, a large smile on your face as you try to suppress your laugh.

“So, you were consistently at the back.” Alex continues.

“Consistency is key.” George tries to reason.

“I think throughout the season you could have lost…” Lando pauses trying to find the right words.

“One position.” You laugh, sticking your finger in the air as George scowls at you jokingly.

“I think it’s a good presentation but not a convincing argument.” Alex finishes off your comments, before getting up ready to present his evidence.

“Okay so I don’t actually have a presentation, so you’re gonna like this, but, uh, I haven’t been very well organised.” He begins, trying to find his piece of paper beneath all the rubbish. “So how do I do this?”

“Uh, tick tock, the times ticking.” George comments as you chuckle at his statement.

“I was uh, a little concerned for him when he told me he was doing a rap.”

“I’m nervous about this.” Alex mumbles, an awkward smile on his face.

“I’m nervous for you.” You speak, he had previously told you that he was going to do a rap and you told him how great of an idea it was, obviously without including how amusing you found it.

“For me?” Albon questions.

“Yes because after yesterday’s performance in that sky sports interview, that was shameful.” You reply, a smug smile on your face.

“That was great!” He tries to reason.

“That was absolutely shameful.” Russell comments.

“That’s some great banter.” Alex says before turning to face the screen.

“Haha, he’s chatting shit like always.”

“This has got all the characteristics of embarrassment.” George remarks.

“For who?” Alex questions.

“You!”

“For me? Not for me!” He argues as you and Lando just sat there, waiting for the charade to end. “Okay, anyways ready?”

“There once was this kid called Lando,

Who thought he could fill the shoes of Fernando,

He managed to bin a hotlap,

Sat your head in your hands,

But Johnny dug him out of the gravel trap,

Where are your one million Instagram fans?,

We came from F2, but we didn't have a clue,

But when you're off the pace and leave too much space,

Like how you did that in that Suzuka race,

Just know that I'll spank you in every race.

How about I introduce you to the only girl on the grid,

She’s joined the top when she’s only a kid,

Missed a lot of chances at coming first,

Caused her to have quite an angry burst,

“I don’t think so.”

Being behind me all the time must be a struggle

The stress of it all must be hard to juggle,

Qualifying for her never seemed to be so hard,

Maybe it’s because I’ve upped my guard.

Now onto our boy Russell,

Who likes to flex the muscle,”

“George’s topless instagram stuff that he likes to do, and I always give him rubbish about it”

“The only driver yet to score

What are you even doing this for?”

“It’s true.”

“Just kidding, I know you can take the flack

By the way, Lewis called: he wants his yellow hoodie back!

Last but not least, let's talk about me

Alex Albon, number 23

Try and stop me getting past?

That's fine, I'll get through on the grass!

I'm going through front wings like no tomorrow

I'm the asian Tom Cruise, so give me a follow

Last race, I came close to champagne

Which thanks to Lewis, never came

But now I'm here to state my claim

If I'm not top rookie, you must be insane!”

You all giggle throughout, immediately clapping once it finished.

“He pulled it off so…”

“Pretty good performance, needed a bit more flow… just like his racing.”

“If only he could do such a good performance on track.”

“That was great.” George assured.

“You could get a career in rapping after that.” You joke, still trying to remain serious.

“You can take this home, uh, just to have it.” Alex hands you each a piece of paper with the rap on, trying to suppress his laughter.

“I’ll hang this on my wall.” You say before Lando got up and got his presentation ready.

“I haven’t got a lot to say, cause the video speaks for itself.” Lando announces before clicking the play button.

The screen quickly presents ‘Reason 1 2 3 4: overtakes’ before showing a video from the race.

It shows Lando overtaking a Renault before having an explosion effect go off on the side, causing you all to laugh.

“That came in a bit early but okay.” George comments before the video moves onto the next scene.

“Okay this one was good.” Alex announces before you point out how Lando was overtaking Alex himself.

The video has another explosion go off before playing the ‘you’re going too fast!’ meme as George quickly mimics it.

‘Reason 5: Respectful’ Quickly presents itself on the screen before showing an interview between Daniel and Lando.

It then shows a montage of clips, the last few being slowed down radio communication causing you to laugh again.

‘Reason 6: Fashion icon’

“I disagree.” You put your hand into the air quickly before letting the video continue, only to be shushed by the presenter himself.

“Respectful… yeah”

The screen finally rolls the credits where it just all goes to Lando.

“Lando, poor effort, really.”

“You know, I expected more from him.”

You just end up shaking your head, a disappointed look on your face.

“Well you’re not getting a round of applause from me.” Alex comments as Lando just stairs, unsure on what to say before looking into the camera.

“I don’t think it was my best performance. I think, uh, I’ve done better things this year driving on track.”

“Alright my turn.” You announce, stepping up from your seat and setting up your video.

“Uh, so, my video contains less facts and just more about why I am the better person in general.” You comment, earning a few ‘offended’ faces before clicking the play button.

The video immediately cuts to a clip of you trying to do a three-legged race with Charles but it just ends up in the two of you falling over. The next clip shows you singing into your radio during the formation lap as your engineer tries to tell you to stop but just gets ignored.

“Haha, she’s gibbering.”

These first clips earned a few chuckles from the guys before it continued.

The next clip shows you going into a hug with Sebastian when your helmets suddenly knock onto each other causing you to nearly fall over. The video finally ended with a few photos of you trying to do yoga poses with multiple drivers before showing a video of you falling straight onto Lando after a failed attempt.

“Pretty good, pretty good.” George comments as you bow.

“Okay verdict.” Alex begins as you quickly sat down in a chair to join the discussions.

“I think yours was pretty good.” You say to Alex as George quickly nods.

“I think I had the legs on them.”

“I think Lando’s was worse.” George suggests as you and Alex quickly nodded.

“Lando’s gotta choose.” You announce as the boy quickly looks at you surprised.

“I’m like the deciding vote.” He reluctantly agrees..

“Well, you’re not the deciding vote.” George tries to reason.

“I know I’m last.”

“I mean, I’d still put me first.”

“Can I say why I think I won?” Alex asks before continuing. “George’s presentation was just facts, you know, facts facts. P19.”

“Yeah.” Lando mumbles.

“I’m actually surprised you only went up two positions.” Alex comments.

“He only went up two? In the whole season?” You questioned, shocked at his lack of improvement.

“Don’t give me that.” Russell shakes his head.

“And with Y/n, there were no facts.” He finishes as Lando nods his head.

“It’s up to you Lando.” You say as he chuckles.

“If it’s based on performance I think Alex has got it, if it’s based on the track, I think we got it-.” “Performance on track.”

“I don’t think I got the hand on them.”

“I’m going to have to go with… Alex.” Lando finally announces after a moment of silence.

“I almost agree, I almost agree, I’m gracious in defeat. He’s gotta have one to show no defeat.” George comments as you pat Alex’s back.

“I’ll take the flack, I’m used to it.”

“And you guys have a trophy as well.” Alex points out as Lando reaches back to grab onto said object, trying to connect the trophy back onto its podium.

“It’s my trophy, my only trophy- ahh.” Albon screams as he nearly drops it, causing you to laugh a little.

“He pulled it off, he pulled it off so…”

“Yeah, like Lando said he needs to transfer that onto the track and he’ll, uh, be in good shape for himself.”

“I think it’s gonna leak.” Alex points out as he pours redbull into the trophy.”

“Oh, it’s leaking real bad.” You point out as Albon quickly drinks out of it.

“Thank you very much, and uh, it’s detachable as well, so uh, I can put it in my suitcase.”

Bloopers/funny bits:

“I can see why Williams chose you after that presentation.” Alex jokes after George finishes, earning a laugh from all of you.

“Lando could fit the whole post-it note on his forehead, it’s that big.” George laughs as you all sit there laughing with notes stuck onto all your faces.

“Where’s my mouse?” Lando questions, his hands spreading everywhere trying to find said object.

“It’s there.” Alex points as Lando quickly finds it.

“Can we, uh, dim the lights.” You ask the producer as they quickly follow.

“No, cause they can’t see our faces you mug.” Alex responds before quickly laughing, causing you to roll your eyes.

taglist :: @topguncultleader @aurora-maria @oooglaabooglaa @teti-menchon0604 @g4ns3y @jivas0 @missskid @anicega @envisionracing @treehouse-mouse @navixfr @gulabjamoon @revemixer @thatsadsmallchild @ideajpeg

If you would like to be on the taglist please this out this form !

#f1 drivers #f1 fic #f1 imagine #f1 #f1 fanfic #f1 x reader #f1 x driver!reader #f1 oc #f1!drivers x fem!driver #f1 x you #formula 1 x you #formula 1 oc #formula 1 #formula 1 x reader #formula 1 imagine #formula 1 x y/n #the paddock princess

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mlmxreader · 3 months

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I'm not gonna be in the Call Of Duty fandom anymore, well, the MW fandom. at least not fully, and I will explain, but first and foremost I want to clarify: I'm NOT leaving tumblr entirely & I'm NOT gonna back down either from my previous statements. So, allow me to begin as to why I'm making this decision.

The rape, incest, pedo and animal abuse pornography

Quite frankly, as someone who has been through rape and child sexual abuse, I find it ABHORRENT that anyone would ever look at such abuses and decide to fetishise, romanticise and glorify these things. I do not care nor want to know your "justifications" because frankly there aren't any. As a survivor, I am aware that the fandom is malicious and nasty towards people like me; I am aware that you people willingly and HAPPILY engage with such harmful, disgusting material. Quite honestly, I could not name a space more dedicated to the harassment, malicious treatment and utterly disgusting behaviour towards these topics and the people who openly disagree with them.

The racism

Before you tell me "Call Of Duty fans have always been racist", I am aware of that. But I'm talking specifically about the niche fandom (because it is niche). The fandom treats Black and Brown characters utterly abhorrently; from turning Gaz into a stereotype through to fetishising Farah and everything in between, the fandom's racism is progressively getting WORSE - and then x reader writers (who are predominantly white) only add to that by purposefully and willfully excluding Black and Brown people from fandom altogether. The racism within this space makes it clear that anybody who is NOT white is NOT welcome, and frankly, I do not wish to be associated with such disgusting people. To treat Black people as tokens, to purposefully KICK people of colour out of fandom - it's disgraceful and I hope that everybody is ashamed of themselves.

The ableism and saneism

The Call Of Duty fandom is NOT a safe place for anyone who has a psychotic, schizospec, dissociative or personality disorder. Plain and simple. From the colloquial usage of mental health terms such as "delusional", through to the "jokes" which are made to trigger people with such disorders (e.g. "in your walls"), and to the casual usage of anti-psychotic slurs like "psycho" and "schizo", it's obvious to anyone with just one quick look that this fandom sees people with such disorders as either their punching bags, their "memes" or worse: not human at all. And this also translates to fanworks, as quite honestly, I'm tired of seeing the same treatment directed towards characters like Nikto, because it shows that you people do not care about us at all. We aren't human to you, and we never will be. We are not even worth CONSIDERING when it comes to offensive language - it's degrading, it's dehumanising and it's exhausting to have to constantly walk away from fanworks that are so obviously made with malicious intent.

The homophobia

I am a bisexual/pansexual/omnisexual/queer/whatever you wanna call it man, and the amount of homophobia in the Call Of Duty fandom is disgusting. No, bisexual men AREN'T your "uwu bby boy so soft such a bottom bitch!!". You perpetuating homophobic stereotypes for the sake of a ship is utterly and completely and truly vile. How dare you claim to support LGBTQIA+/queer people when you KNOWINGLY perpetuate these stereotypes? When you KNOWINGLY engage in homophobic behaviour. You are scum.

The antisemitism and islamophobia

This is a touchy subject for non-religious folk, but I really wish you lot would all leave religious people alone. It takes you two seconds to look up what Muslims and Jews believe in and act accordingly. It takes you two seconds to NOT open your mouth when Muslims and Jews talk about their headcanons of characters being religious - because what gives you the right? Why do you feel so comfortable to shut down religious people's headcanons of characters? "Oh, he can't be Jewish because he's English", English Jews exist. "Oh, he can't be Muslim because he's Scottish", Scottish Muslims exist. These people exist in real life, and you saying that a character CANNOT be a Muslim or a Jew because of where they come from is little more than antisemitism and Islamophobia. Do better.

The apathy

When I say "the apathy", I mean exactly that. It is exhausting having to call out these horrid things time and time again and then see people WILLINGLY ignoring blatant bigotry by brushing it off and saying "I don't want to get involved in drama", as if somebody being a bigot is akin to a quarrel between two friends, or a disagreement between two people. If you aren't willing to address genuine harm ONLINE, then I'm sorry, but I doubt you would do anything OFFLINE either. If you're boiling things that actually harm people down to "drama", then I'm sorry, but you can't expect to be considered a safe person for people to be open with and to be honest with when it comes to their mental health or to their triggers. It's that simple. Your apathy towards your fellow man is blatant, and I cannot in good conscience continue to rub shoulders with such people.

Going forward

I'm not going to be engaging with MOST of the content within the Call Of Duty fandom - whether that's edits, fanfic, fanart, etc. I'm not. I've got a few mutuals who I've decided I WILL continue reading from or looking at their art or whatever, but for the most part, I'm not going to be active within the Call Of Duty fandom. I will continue writing for SOME of the characters, but my list of who I write for will be drastically reduced to just a few select characters. If somebody asks me "hey, is X thing saneist?" then of course I'll answer. If somebody points out to me that I took a request from someone who follows a rape pornographer, then I will delete that request and that fanfic entirely. I will still be happy to talk about the characters & games, but it will only be WHEN ASKED, and I will continue to use my DNI (although I'm going to change it a little so that the rape porn viewers/readers know I don't want them near me).

Of course, if anyone requires further clarification on anything I said, I'll be happy to answer and explain as best as I can! And if anyone feels emboldened by this post to come forward and share their own experiences with such things, then I will happily read through that, too! This post is 100% okay to reblog, and if anyone wishes to reblog it and go "This is also why I left the fandom", then I will happily hear you out. What I will NOT hear out, however, is any justification or defence of any of the harmful behaviours I have mentioned - I do not wish to hear it. Pack it in, and take it to 4Chan where you belong.

#ok to reblog #ok to rb #call of duty #cod #call of duty mw2 #call of duty modern warfare 2

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olderthannetfic · 5 months

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I thought the "be gay, do crime" memes were a joke about the criminalization of queer identities, but apparently they're not?

Some fujo discource crossed my dash and I thought it was weird that a website full of people who joyously reclaim the concept of their identities being criminal would freak out at the idea of people self labeling as "rotten women".

Which was a weird way to find out that the "crime" in the memes is supposed to be shoplifting and vandalism and other teenage "acting out" behavior, and it was never a radical queer statement to begin with.

It would also be nice if people grasped that 腐 shows up not just in 腐る but in 豆腐, and 腐女子 sounds the same as 婦女子.

It's not rotten like morally depraved. It's literal mold or fermentation or fucking tofu. And a pun on 'respectable woman'.

The reason it got reclaimed is probably because it's fucking funny.

The original Be Gay, Do Crime graffiti may have meant something radical. Social media immediately turned it into turnstile jumping and shoplifting.

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orderforbrian · 2 years

Text

ouuugghhh this comic is OLD but it's still one of my favorites 💖 i made rough blocks when the liveshow came out because jon and martin's meet cute/ugly is SO in character and so wonderfully funny

[Start ID: A two page comic of Jon and Elias from the Magnus Archives with Martin as a side character. Jon is a Persian man with short, dark curly hair and rectangular glasses. There are streaks of grey in his hair and eyebrows. He is wearing a green jacket with a grey sweatervest, white dress shirt, and green tie. Elias is a tan white man with slicked back brown hair, there are streaks of grey in his hair. He is wearing an expensive looking blue suit jacket, vest, dress shirt, and tie. He is also wearing long gold earrings in the shape of a closed eye. Martin is a mixed Polish/Korean man with dark wavy hair and glasses, and a beauty mark on his left chin.

1st panel: Jon slams open the door to Elias' office, looking the picture of rage. He is gripping a piece of paper angrily in one hand. A thought bubble shows a meme image of Spongebob choking Mr. Krabs from the series Spongebob. Elias appears unfazed by the interruption and greets Jon, "Oh! Hello, Archivist. I was wondering when you would finally catch me at my desk, haha."

2nd panel: Off panel, Elias asks "How was your first day?". Jon pushes up his glasses, gripping the paper even tighter and responds, "Undoubtedly horrendous".

3rd panel: Elias gives him an apologetic smile with his hands folded in front of his chest. He says, "Oh dear, that dreadful? Apologies you had to endure such unanticipated distress. What exactly happened to cause this reaction?". There is an arrow pointing to Elias that says "As if he didn't spend relish in every chaotic second".

4th panel: Jon begins to list things off, pointing to each finger as he does. Elias responds intermittently to these.

"Well, to start, the Archives is an ungodly mess. It's going to take ages before it gets sorted out. Why you didn't fire Gertrude is beyond me."

"Mm."

"None of the statements are compatible with modern technology so we've had to resort to using archaic tape recorders."

"Oh."

"And-"

"Oh, there's more."

5th panel: Jon tightens his fists in rage, gradually yelling, "I spent a large portion of my already stressful workday chasing after a bloody dog that your library transfer let loose into the Archives!"

6th: Jon begins to rant, shaking one hand back and forth in frustration. "Why is he there? What qualifications does he have? And absolutely what right? He's from Library, why do we need Library in the Archive staff, much more why him specifically? I requested Tim and Sasha who are far more competent than that - that bumbling idiot! Mr. Bouchard, I'd hate to overstep my boundaries but I really must say this was an unwise decision-". Elias cuts him off, a dialogue bubble with a simplified person smiling. "Oh dear - Archivist..."

1st panel: Elias gives Jon another apologetic smile. "I sent someone from Library because the Archives desperately needs someone skilled in cataloging. And, evidently, he has a Masters in parapsychology so give him time to prove himself a necessary addition to your assistant team."

2nd panel: Jon appears disgruntled and crosses his arms, grumbling, "Mmn. Well, he has quite a lot to prove after today...Apologies for doubting your decision, but if he continues to hinder our progress I will make my objections very clear." Elias says off panel, "I believe that's a fair compromise. Well, apologies again. As always, I'm open to feedback."

3rd panel: Elias continues off panel. "I'm a bit surprised though...". Jon looks up with wide eyes, a bead of sweat on his face. "Huh?". Elias continues, "You didn't find him the least bit charming? I thought he was rather amused the day of his interview, haha."

4th panel: Jon pushes up his glasses, attempting to hide a blush, and says, "A-as of my current opinion, no. I did not find his ineptitude charming if you'd kindly, Mr. Bouchard."

5th panel: Elias says off panel with a simplified smiling face, "Well, I do hope you all get along soon enough...". Jon presses the paper in his hand to his chin, looking off to the side. He appears disgruntled and is blushing too. Thought bubbles of Martin surround him. One is Martin appearing flustered, his eyes appearing as swirls within his glasses. Another is Martin hovering over Jon, asking if he is okay. Another is Martin looking up with a hand to his chin, stating "I mean...yeah, probably!". The last is Martin holding his glasses and giving a flustered smile, saying "Haha, s-sorry!". Jon thinks to himself, "Hrmm...He might be cute, but he's a complete airhead! Ugh. Hopefully today was just a singular incident."

End ID.]

#tma #the magnus archives #jmart #jonmartin #jonathan sims #martin blackwood #tma fanart #literally obssessed with their first meeting like martin really was like this handsome prick is gonna fire me #and jon is like this cute idiot is gonna ruin my career #order up! art tag #comics are all fun and game until you have to write the image id lawl

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bigmilkagenda · 3 months

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Of the many, many plates of pancakes* that were offered to the listener in magp 1-07, this one may be my favourite

[ID: A screenshot of an unofficial transcript to The Magnus Protocol. CELIA is saying "Yeah. I mean, it's an old system, but it could have been worse. It's not like we're wrestling with tape recorders and manila folders." /end ID]

When we meet TMA-Celia for the second time, she's lost her name. She was Lynne Hammond, and now she's not. She doesn't seem to remember Martin, either, but it's not clear how much of herself and her life from before the change she does remember. She's freaked out by the tape recorders that start showing up, and there's no indication that she associates them with the Institute specifically.

If Celia Ripley is, as we are clearly intended to believe or consider, the same Celia as in TMA, why is she making knowing comments about manila folders and tape recorders? Tape recorders in particular are hardly standard equipment at what seems to be mostly a text data-entry and cataloguing job. She could have said typewriters, or carbon paper. Fax machines, if we're dunking on Freddy specifically.

She says "tape recorders and manila folders." Celia Ripley is referencing The Magnus Institute, particularly the outdated technologies in use in the Archives.

Maybe she learned more from Melanie about what the recorders were and did at the Institute, sometime after MAG 190. Maybe she has those specific memories of giving her statement in MAG 100, and little else. Maybe Martin grew an apocalypse beard and she remembers everything, but just didn't recognise him out of context and in a tunnel and during A Pretty Weird Time Overall.

Maybe she stuck around with Melanie-Georgie-Basira for a while after things returned, and that's how she learned about the particular significance of tape recorders.

Maybe she found some tapes and listened to a couple hundred of them.

Or maybe she's simply an AU Celia, with a knack for oddly specific and kind of clunky comparisons, drawn into this through the powers of metafiction and string theory.

Or maybe someone filled her with spiders and sent her to finish the job of spreading Fear to this particular world.

And the reason this particular plate of textual pancakes** (short stack, butter and nightmare syrup) is one of my favourites from "Give and Take" is because I genuinely have no idea! None of these are theories because there isn't enough evidence to point me in any particular direction. It's a mystery!, Jon voice, etcetera.

If you cornered me and paid me to have an opinion about it I could say which options I thought were more likely, I guess. But the odds are high that I'd be wrong, and I think the boat for me getting paid to interpret texts probably sailed fifteen years ago, besides. I'm in this for the love of the game.***

November is the true spooky season in the northern hemisphere.**** Yeah, October ends with Halloween, but you know what month starts with Halloween? Mmhmm. By November of 2019 TMA had been on my list for a few years, and someone I was getting to know and really liked recommended it to me specifically in the days after 159 aired. The conditions were correct for me to get into something new, is what I'm saying. I still remember listening to "Anglerfish" for the first time, walking home from my office job in the blustery November dark. I got home starry-eyed and red-cheeked and thrilled by the story I'd just heard.

It took a couple of months for me to catch up, and though I loved having so much to listen to there were times when I wished I'd started earlier, to have the experience of seeing things unfold.

And now we're back at a beginning, and get to experience the horrible joys of finding out.

[ID: A screenshot of an unofficial transcript to The Magnus Protocol. LENA is saying "Of a sort. I hope you're as ready for it as you think you are. Consider yourself "in." /end ID]

*Sabrina pancake meme

** the best kind, especially if it's a contest between textual and fluffy pancakes. Keep those spongy bastards away from me, I'll take the kind with a typeface instead

***Being a huge nerd

**** For more of my opinions on November, see https://www.tumblr.com/almostmolly/188799234276

#tmagp #tma #the magnus protocol #celia ripley #celia tmagp #lynne hammond #tmagp meta #loosely. this is neither litcrit not analysis nor speculation in the sense that i don't subscribe to any of the possible paths as true #and also realise there could be a dozen other things i haven't talked about here #i know I've said spiders celia twice but I'm kind of like a person who makes red string boards for the aesthetics #it's part of the decor y'know?#sorry for the link to my tumblr poetry blog but also: I'm not bad at it so. not that sorry #pancakes (derogatory)

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scholastic-dragon · 2 years

Text

Flufftober Day 17: Up Against the Wall Kiss

Leonardo x Gn!reader

Word count: 1.1k

Warnings: turtle smootches (my favorite), established relationship, nervous and flustered Leo, idiots in love, spelling mistakes,

Summary: Leo's too shy to initiate your first kiss; you're not.

Leo was a gentleman.

Sometimes a little too much so.

He was ever so sweet and thoughtful. Always pulling out your chair, offering you a hand when climbing down the manhole ladder.

It's what drew you to him. He had a heart of gold hidden behind his strong chest and he'd given you the honor of calling it yours.

Two and a half months into your relationship and you hadn't stopped smiling. You were sure he hasn't either.

That wasn't to say it was without fault. It took a bit of work in the beginning, he sat you down and sheepishly explained how nervous he was and that he wanted to take things slow. You agreed and allowed him the time to open up about his boundaries.

After that, things only got better and better. He texted you whenever he could, sometimes thoughtful messages, others funny pictures and memes and sometimes simply 'I miss you'

You couldn't complain. You shouldn't complain. And yet....he's yet to kiss you. You can tell he wants to.

Getting ready to leave your apartment after dinner and a movie, perched on the windowsill, eyes flickering between your eyes and your lips.

Then he bids you goodnight and ducks out of the window.

You’d be lying if you said it didn’t bother you. It was clear he wanted to kiss you: so why hadn’t he?

Deciding it was time for a change, you invite him over for another dinner and movie. He accepts without question.

You feel nervous throughout the whole evening, it wasn’t a big deal, was it?

“Are you alright, love?” Leo asks, gently putting his hand over yours. His palm alone engulfs your whole hand, he’s warm and comforting and pulls you out of your thoughts.

You shake your head, forcing a smile. “Yeah, yeah, I’m okay, just got some stuff on my mind,” You take a sip of your drink, hoping your face wasn’t as red as you felt.

“Do you want to talk about it?” He squeezes your hand, smiling warmly: why was he so handsome?

“We probably should,” You scoff, exhaling sharply. He raises an eyebrow, rolling his shoulders back. “It’s nothing bad,” You’re quick to amend, not wanting him to assume the worst.

“What is it? You can tell me,”

“I know I can, I just, well, I’m not sure how to go about it,” You start to ramble, feeling a blush creeping across your cheeks. “There’s something I want us to do and I know some part of you does, but if I’m going too fast or you feel uncomfortable you can just tell me and I’ll back off, but-”

“Love,” He quietly laughs, “Deep breaths, okay? You don’t need to be nervous,”

You take a deep breath, rolling your shoulders back and meeting his bright eyes.

“I....I want to....to kiss you,” You were sure his heart stopped. He inhaled sharply, shoulders going back, eyes wide. He looked like he stopped breathing. “Leo?”

“I....um....uh,” He looked away, hand rubbing the back of his neck. You were sure if he could he’d be bright red.

“If that’s too much right now we don’t have too,” You squeeze his hand. “I don’t want to pressure you into doing something you don’t want to do,”

He sighs, whispering as if he were saying something he shouldn’t. “I want to, I-I just,” He runs his free hand down his face, clearing his throat.

“It’s okay if you’re not ready,” Reaching across the table you tilt his chin toward you. “I just wanted to let you know that whenever you’re ready to take that step, I’m here,”

He smiles, a small sigh of relief escaping him. He takes your hand from under his chin and presses three firm kisses to your knuckles.

“And I’m so grateful for how patient your being, and how you’re willing to take this slow.” He opens and closes his mouth a few times, unsure of how to word his statement. “I want to....to kiss you, but, I’m nervous,”

“Nervous about what, honey?” He lowers his hand, still holding yours, to the table, not meeting your eyes.

“You’d be my first kiss and I’m afraid I’m not going to do it right,” He mumbles, running his thumb across the back of your hand.

You smile, taking both of your hands and cupping his. “That’s alright, Leo, we’ll learn together, okay?”

He nods, exhaling a deep breath. Not wanting to stress him out more, you offer to snuggle on the couch with a movie. He agrees, helping you pack away the leftover food and rinse the dishes. Now you’re wrapped up in his arms watching a cheesy Christmas movie.

“Is there a reason why we’re watching a Christmas movie in the middle of October?” He mumbles into your hair.

You shake you head. “Makes me happy, I love Christmas,” Your back is pressed up against his chest, you feel him chuckle softly, wrapping his arms tighter around your waist.

The movie goes by quick and now you’re back to the same spot. He’s putting on his gear and shoes, telling you the schedule for the next week and when you both can hangout.

He opens your window and turns around, looming over you.

“I’ll text you later?” He gives his classic boyish smile, eyes soft and he reaches for your hands.

“Yes, you should,” You giggle, squeezing his hands, looking up into his blue eyes.

The moment happens again, eyes flickering back and forth between your lips. He leans forward; this is it, he’s gonna do it. He leans at the last second, pressing a sweet kiss to your cheek.

Damn it.

He sheepishly pulls back, clearly a little embarrassed.

“Leo?” He hums, not wanting to speak. “Do you want me to initiate the kiss?” He swallows hard, adams apple bobbing, he nods eagerly.

Smiling you push on the hard plates of his chest, his eyes go wide but he lets you move him until his shell bumps the wall. You take his face in your hands, gently adjusting his mask.

“Ready?” He nods again, licking his lips.

Your thumbs running along his cheekbones, you lean up on your tiptoes, tilting your face to meet his. His lips are considerably larger than yours, but are warm and soft. He’s gentle, afraid he might mess up, but you feel his shoulders loosen.

You pull away, trying not to giggle as he leans forward, recapturing your lips. His hands, shakily, go to your waist, pulling you closer. Gaining a small spark of confidence, he splays his palms across your back, holding you close.

Needing air, you pull away, panting heavily you meet his eyes. He’s smiling and panting as much, if not more, than you are.

“How was that for a first kiss?” You giggle, kissing his chin.

“Not sure, perhaps you should give me another,” He leans in, pressing his lips to yours again.

He was such a gentleman.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

tags: @flufftober @turtle-babe83 @thelaundrybitch @mysticboombox @strawberrycakeblog

#flufftober #flufftober2022 #flufftober 2022 #flufftober day 17 #day 17 #up against the wall kiss #tmnt leo #tmnt bayverse #tmnt 2014 #tmnt 2016 #tmnt leonardo #tmnt leonardo x reader #tmnt leo x reader #tmnt #tmnt headcannons #tmnt imagines #tmnt imagine #tmnt x reader

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anonymous-eggy · 6 months

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your leander analysis was soooo spot on !! it's the first one that made sense to me !! i was always like ?? why would he try to mess with you ?? it just didn't make sense to me ?? you're so big brain

exactlyyyy!

i think my point didnt really get across because i said it in a very dramatic manner, but the point is there.

at the end of the day, Leander wants to manipulate you into trusting him. for what reason? we don't know yet. To take down the senobium? for selfish reasons? both?

no matter the reason, he's cunning and manipulative. he's not prone to outbursts and immediate revenge from what we've seen in the demo. he didn't become the trusted and adored leader of a huge gang by having childish outbursts and taking his frustration out on others for not trusting him or not wanting to be around him. he's like a wolf. he will play the long game if he really has to. if it becomes a game of stamina, he'll keep chasing you until you dont want to or cant run anywhere but into his arms. into his maw of fangs that he's conditioned you to believe is home so he can finally snap his jaw shut on you.

He is the safehouse, the leader. everyone follows him eventually. he just likes to make you feel like it was your choice all along and not something he was steering you towards since the very beginning.

this is literally what makes him such an attractive character. we know in the back of our minds (whether or not we realize it) that this is what he's doing. its so bad, but it so good at the same time. he has secrets and depth to his character and we want to know them.

honestly, if anything, he grabbed mc's hand when they choose to hesitate out of desperation to prove he can handle it and gain that huge leap of trust in Mc.

which caused mc a moment of panic and surprise, thus causing their curse to flare up. the same way i assume mhin's curse would flare up to protect them. this flare up was more than what leander had planned for, so he has a moment where he has to bat away the curse with whatever stupid powerful magic he's gotten ahold of.

once again, he wants you to trust him. this is obviously a bad situation where there's only two believable and sucky ways to play it off. the truth, or a prank. so he has to pick the lesser of two bad choices and play it off like he was just messing around. like it was just jokes and everything was fine all along!!! i think theres a small crack in his facade when he says something along the lines of Mc's curse being some serious stuff he's never seen before. this is a true statement buried in false ones. its easy to breeze over. he's successfully fooled you and won if he can get you to believe he was genuinely just fucking with you.

but yeah, sure Mc could have gotten pissed with him, but isnt a moment of Mc being pissed at a joke better than them not trusting him with their curse? the trust broken from a prank is MUCH easier to repair than trust broken from a curse that almost slipped through his magical protections.

Leander wants Mc alive, safe, and trusting him COMPLETELY. He (i assume unknowingly) hints at this anytime he talks about how he shouldn't have let you leave his side. he is that one "the illusion of choice" meme.

My ending statement will be this: i am OBSESSED with characters that have a true personality hidden under a different one. the little phrases that slip out and give insight into the truth are my JAM. characters that dangle a shiny charming personality like an angler fish. maybe its because of my trauma, but we dont have to talk about that.

#eggy answers #leander #leander touchstarved #touchstarved game #touchstarved demo #touchstarved leander #touchstarved mc #touchstarved #leander ts #touchstarved theory

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cowgurrrl · 6 months

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I've been rotting away in bed all weekend recovering from a cold and I made the mistake of rereading some parts of OFTM and I miss them so much 😭 how's our favorite famous duo doing? I can't stop thinking about reader having to defend/support joel for whatever reason, but it's with the vibe of this meme LMAO like that is HER man, how dare people say anything about him

J!!! I love this request!! Thank you for sending it in and I’m sorry it took so long 🩷

Girls on Film

Pairing: rockstar!joel x actress!reader

Summary: this ask

Warnings: unedited because you can’t make me, discussions of toxic behavior, language, Joel being a dilf, June once again not knowing how to properly end a fic, I think that’s it??

Joel is protective of his kids. Sometimes, a little too much, in your opinion but you didn’t marry him because he does things half-way. With each new addition to the family, his papa bear instincts grew and grew. And if you’re being completely honest, his protectiveness and love for his kids is part of the reason why you ended up with five kids to begin with.

When he was giving his interview to People during his Sexiest Man Alive shoot, he was asked what accomplishment of his he’s most proud of. Without missing a beat, he said, “my family.” He went into what little detail you use to talk about the kids in a public setting, even getting a little misty-eyed in the process. The second the crew was out of your house, you nearly jumped his bones right then and there. You found out you were pregnant with the girls about two months later.

So, yeah, he’s a great dad, and it’s super hot. Whatever. It’s universally known within your family that there’s almost nothing he wouldn’t do for his kids. He just loves them with everything he has and wants them to live full and happy lives. Which is fine until he bears his claws in public.

Following a particularly problematic documentary with some of today’s biggest stars, Joel was more than ready to say what had been on his mind when an interviewer stopped him on a red carpet and asked, “are there any people in the music industry you wouldn’t let your daughters date?” The daughters in question were never specified but it’s either between his married thirty-one year old, his lesbian (also married) twenty-eight year old, or his three year old twins. He wasn’t comfortable thinking about any option.

“My kids are free to date anyone they want, but we have a strict no assholes policy in our house.” He said and the interviewer raised her eyebrows. “Like I wouldn’t let ‘em date any of those idiots from that documentary.”

“Why do you say that?” The interviewer asked and Joel shrugged.

“My kids deserve better than some fucker in black eyeliner claimin’ to save rock ‘n roll when all he’s doing is being a sexist pig who makes shitty music.” By the time his words reached your ears, it was too late to stop him. The clip from the interview was making the rounds before you can even get home.

Paul, his poor, poor manager of several years, reaches out to him the next morning to ask if he wants to make a statement, amends, anything to smooth this over. Joel curtly responds to his long email with a short, “no,” and that ends the conversation. What’s even worse if you can’t even argue with him. He’s right. You’ve seen first hand how people in the music industry treat each other and it’s awful. Why should he be the one who gets shit on because he spotlighted other people’s behavior?

You are able to dodge questions, paparazzi, and others wanting to know the inside scoop for weeks until you feel yourself getting just as frustrated as Joel was. Leave it to the press to want the wife to offer explanation for her husband’s actions. It isn’t until you get an offer from Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen that you agree to even think about saying anything.

That night, Joel stays home with the kids and watches you walk out on stage with Carolina in a long bell bottoms, platform wedges, and your (Joel’s) favorite vintage band shirt. You and Carolina hug Andy and get some initial questions answered but it doesn’t take long before the subject turns to Joel.

“Now, I know everything’s been very hush, hush but Joel started a lot of discourse online about the music industry. What can you tell us about what he said?” He asks and you nod, smiling and playing with your wedding ring.

“That’s been like the question of the month, hasn’t it?” You joke to break the ice. “Look, I think we all saw the same documentary. We all heard what those men said and to act like we didn’t is, honestly, kind of ridiculous. Joel knows the industry better than I do and he knows that nothing is going to change unless you call out the people making it miserable for younger kids.”

“So, you agree with what he said?”

“One hundred percent. He was right that we have a no assholes policy for our kids but, other than that, we really don’t have rules about their dating lives,” you say. “And I think he was right to call out those guys. It’s not fair that they get protected by their little boys club and that just has to be the way things go. I think it’s bullshit.”

“You seem to feel passionately about this.” Andy says and you nod.

“Well, it’s not just because people are coming after my husband. It’s because we’ve both seen what any toxic environment can do to people which is why he owns his own label now.”

“And it’s doing very well. He just signed one of the biggest breakout stars of the year, didn’t he?”

“He did. And you know why it’s doing so well?” You ask, leaning in like you’re about to tell him a secret. “Because he doesn’t sign assholes. He doesn’t put his name next to theirs. He doesn’t even want to be associated with them because for as much as it’s his name, it’s also my name and our kids’ names. So, people can say whatever they want about what Joel said but I will support him and his mission and when his artists start winning Grammy’s and spots in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, we won’t even remember the names of the people who got fifteen minutes of fame and a shitty sound bite to show for themselves.” You say and somewhere in California, Joel nearly jumps out of his seat with excitement, praising you like you’re there with him.

The second you walk off stage, your phone lights up with Joel’s contact photo and you laugh as you answer it. “Will you marry me?” He asks before you can even say hello.

“I’m assuming you saw the show.”

“Saw it? Baby, I recorded it,” he says. “When are you comin’ home?”

“Tomorrow. You’re supposed to pick me up, remember?” You ask and he groans.

“You ain’t allowed to be that sexy on TV across the country.”

“Keep it your pants, cowboy. I’ll be home soon.”

“Yes, ma’am.” He sighs dejectedly like a ten-year-old.

When you get back to California the next day, the discourse has been put to rest and Joel is almost giddy when he watches you come down the escalator. The flowers in his hand get crushed when you hug him tight and let him kiss you like he hasn’t seen you in years. “Where are my children?” You ask when he finally pulls away and he smirks.

“With Ryan. The kids wanted to have a play date.”

“So, the house is empty?”

“And clean.”

“Joel Miller, will you marry me?” You echo his question from earlier and he laughs.

Then, like a perfect gentleman, he takes your suitcase, opens doors for you, and drive you home to properly fuck the shit out of you. (Author’s note: I want to put <3 right here so mf bad but I won’t because I’m a professional. PS old man rockstar!joel fucks severely. PPS it’s canon because I say so)

#one for the money two for the show #rockstar!joel miller x actress!reader #rockstar!joel miller #the last of us au #tlou au #joel miller au #joel miller fluff #joel miller series #joel miller the last of us #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x reader #joel miller fic #joel miller

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