midnight secrets | luke castellan
pairing : luke castellan x nyx!reader
request: can you write about luke and a daughter of nyx? <33
IN WHICH — he knows only one true thing: you put all the stars to shame.
"now I just wanna stay here and fall into midnight. Want nobody else now, only you, feel right" - a.
w.c. 1.9k
warning(s) : soft ゜✭・.
✩ ‧₊˚ author's note can you tell when I was younger I had fallen in love with the night and the idea of it? cuz I did. very much so, I'd say. also water, always loved the concept of it--the fragility and softness of it, like a balm against my skin.
long, long ago you learned of the sea of stars and their stories, from which rose their beginning and end. the stars were beings of heat and fire; they were beautifully mortal and alive.
they danced upon the domain of zeus; showering the sky with lights when night fell and befitting the world with their glow.
but as the sands of time bade the next and the corners of the sky dulled, the toll of living and breathing became too much. and so in the vast space of nothingness among the empty silence, the stars took on the duty of protecting a human and god: following where they might go, to every lifetime and universe as if they could erase the tragedy of the divine that swam through their blood.
and when each stars’ child died and their soul followed its ache to finally rest, the star would fall out of the sky in a blazing trail of destruction and divinity to taste freedom one last time and meet them in the next life.
there had been something raw and gruesomely alive about the stars when you learned of the story and so everyday, you’d trapeze the mortal line between night and sleep to watch them in absolution. you yearned to find an answer as to why? why would such immortal and imposing celestial beings like the stars willingly ruin themselves for us humans, for us beings that hungered for war and found pain like a symphony?
you learned your answer when you met luke castellan, your own tragic star who would follow you when the blood of the gods stopped flowing through your veins and your existence came to its calamitous end.
you had spent most of your life curiously confused as if there was something missing that made you feel broken; a piece of the puzzle that made drizzles seem like hurricanes and everything seem like an unsolvable mystery, constantly itching at your skin as if you just needed to pull back the layers and scratch.
and then, one day it stopped.
the buzzling in your head faded and you seem to finally just be.
luke castellan was the rain before the storm, the pain before the raw scream; every fatal, holy thing that meant absolution and destruction in the same manner. a price you were willing to pay if it meant loving him.
and you did–love him that is. every part of you ached with love for your golden boy who had weathered storms like they were his prison and had wanted like it was a fatal wound that might never heal.
you first met the golden castellan boy nearly a year after coming to camp where you were claimed to be a child of the night and stars, the goddess nyx; an absolution of divinity that you would be every dark, enchanting thing he would know. you were the only thing that would allow the hurt in him to finally cease its dance and just allow him to simply be.
while the blood of the gods flowed through your veins, the peace only night could bring was your cover. it was every paceless sleep spent at the docks praying to your mother for one more star to keep its dance, it was heaven and heartbreak in the same measure.
when both man and monster fell to slumber, it was the knowing that eventually everyone would cease their dance sooner or later.
people would watch you like you were a painting come to life as the moon basked you in waves of starlight and the forest came to life in your presence. when the night grew tired of its waiting and the stars lost their way, it was you coaxing them back to life to the restlessness all beings underwent.
you were a creature of presence and peaceful destruction, misfortune and desire–every loud, unsaintly thing the brown-eyed, dimpled boy had thought.
and he was your exact opposite: bold, bright and charming like the sun. it was as if hermes had threaded gold through his veins and ichor had poured forth to create whatever celestial thing luke was. a type of burn only the sun could bring when you went off to your death.
the night had settled upon the camp long ago and so nothing but the loudness of silence and pensive dreams continued its echo. except for the child of the night and her sun who seem to find balance between the bumbling and the glow of the soft moon.
luke grabbed your hand and threaded his fingers, clutching you tightly as if you’d disappear with the breeze and never return.
he guided you to the docks where the river reflected back the divinity of the night sky and lapped gentle waves against the shore. you sat side by side, silently basking in the quiet.
breaking the silence, he asked, “what’s wrong?”
what was wrong? you didn’t quiet know. there was just a sort of cloak of discomfort that had settled over you that you couldn’t seem to shake off.
“do you ever wonder what’ll happen next?”
you settled his hand in your lap and grabbed it like it was a lifeline, tethering your aching body back to the living when all you wanted was to fade. he only rubbed the back of your knuckle, soothing the skin and the bone-deep itch all at once.
you turn to gaze at him, and suddenly you were jealous of the moon and how it shined so beautifully on him like it was made for him to bask under.
he turns to look at you, “before no. now…every moment, i begin to think what makes us so different from humans that we suffer tragedy while they can live how they please and without the cruelty of the gods. I think about what will happen when i finally pass on from this life to wherever my soul may go.”
you don’t think you could handle leaving this world after him. it was a type of pain that would kill you inside out, you decided. you knew it.
there is vulnerability in him that speaks out, “and then i dream that none of that matters because someday you and i make it out of here. out of this place and away from gods and monsters.”
you only grab his other hand and the one you currently have trapped and place a kiss upon each of the palms, embedding all the affection you have for him in that moment. it is something so humanely lived that the world stops moving and the gods see a love for the ages.
he plucks you up from his side and merely places you in his lap, wrapping you tightly in arms like there is no war spreading and reaching it’s claws from the horizon toward the two of you.
you simply close your eyes, soaking in the boy who's holding you like you are a divine being.
“open your eyes and show me the stars, pretty girl.”
all he can think is the moon and stars, which you've fallen in love with so many times has nothing against you. and suddenly your staring the biggest star in the face, wondering if in another life you were the moon and he was the sun king.
but when he kisses you, you realize no. he is simply the star that will follow you when your bodies turn to ash, being picked up by the breeze. and there is only the secret that luke castellan would allow himself a thousand years of destruction if it meant following you where ever you go.
you two are simply a star and his love.
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The problem with Adrian Shepard (and why it's mindboggling that he lasted so long in the Alliance military) is that he can be insufferable when it comes to being told what to do. You have to tell him the "why" of it or he will immediately go into "fucking around and finding out" mode. And sometimes he'll do what he wants regardless -- they absolutely did explain why humans (a couple of other species, too, but mainly humans) have to be unconscious for relay travel*, but he didn't like the explanation (it was infuriatingly vague and tantalising in its vagueness), so he casually "forgot" to double-check with the technician to make sure they knew he was resistant to most anaesthetics and sedatives, and he received the standard dose for his first relay jump.
He caught hell from his superiors on the other side of the jump, but it was worth it. ...No it wasn't. What he got for his troubles was a wonder most people would never come close to witnessing, sure, but the ocular searing and vertigo put him out of commission for longer than he'd liked. And the visions he saw in the void of timeless spacelessness... proto-Protheans in subthalassian halls; the mercurial grinning face of his father-killer-lover; a vessel shaped like a mollusc shell in which someone that felt strangely familiar** was trapped in a pod much like his stasis chamber, only more organic; a woman shrouded in red and black (and yellow) that pinned him with a severe and knowing gaze (surely not. surely she could not see him, passing through a galaxy parallel to hers. surely not? well, why not? he was seeing her, after all. the abyss gazes back.).
Too much, for young Adrian Shepard. Maybe not worth it. Why rush? He would know it all, eventually, anyway. But you could say the same of us too, and yet, we still look.
*in Adrian's Milky Way, relay travel works on Foundation rules.
**a certain warlock who has a multiversal red-spidersilk-thread connection to Noah Kingfisher, an engineer whom Adrian will not meet until he is Commander of the Normandy -- but again, the construct of linear time did not operate in this space.
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new intro post
hey, my name is mare. i also go by ides, saturn, or absinthe.
they/she/he | minor | asexual lesbian | iraqi-american | system host
née the-ides-of-violets or fieldsofsunflowers8
profile picture here, banner picture here
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poetry, fashion, queer musings, politics talk, misc chatter, assorted fandom rbs (for fandoms i have no dedicated blog for).
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i have other blogs not listed (ex a vent blog w/ 0 followers <3 if u like that kinda thing and want 2 follow hmu), so if you are really fucking confused why i of all people am following you, it’s because of those.
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this blog is trans-friendly and always will be trans-friendly. additionally, i do not like to discuss syscourse/system discourse, and this blog is firmly against gender essentialism/misandry and/or misogyny. i consider myself a radical inclusionist and abide by the general policy of i do not know a stranger better than they know themself.
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see i’m above the law bc my superior mindset (which realistically i’m sure is not uncommon) is that while davekat are the endgame couple, johndave are the beginning. they’re the foundation of it all.
(there is hella ramble under this cut man. i’m getting emotional about pixelated boys again.)
so as we all know, we start the webcomic with dave already having a crush on john. maybe he doesn’t even know it yet, maybe he does, but ultimately john is dave’s first real life gay crush and dave is john’s too but his takes a while to form. yknow i hear a boat with only ur sister and nicholas cage for three years is a great way to end up pondering the homoerotic undertones of ur closest friendship.
i don’t know if they even actually date, i can see them being just like an unlabelled kinda experimental thing, hidden away in a corner on the meteor somewhere having this vulnerable moment together of soft touches and racing heartbeats and just getting to explore themselves and their feelings in the safety and security of each other, and they don’t really know what they are they’re just them, this is just how it was meant to be with them. it’s awkward and vulnerable and stupid and soft and dorky, but eventually just very natural and normal. still mostly behind closed doors but it’s not like no one can tell there’s something there lmao.
and eventually they decide they just wanna be friends again and there’s some grief and heartbreak but when they come out the other side of that they’re closer than ever. they’re more like moirails in my eyes but they don’t call it that bc be fr both of them would rather die than let karkat win. by this point everyone knows, no one cares ofc they’re in fucking space with grey aliens who has time for homophobia. probably eridan but he actually probably is the only one who doesn’t know. i can’t see him caring enough about them to notice.
then ofc when dave realises his feelings for karkat john is his shoulder to lean on dealing with that, and when john starts thinking about june dave wouldn’t breathe a word of it to anyone until she’s ready.
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