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#sinon never posts anything

violetteshoneybee · 3 years

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MISS THING, OMG, I JUST SAW THE TWO VIDS YOU SUBMITTED FOR ME AND OMFG?!

first of all, the color scheme? I am absolutely in love with wth like it suits you so well? I'm genuinely jealous, wtf, teach me! THE DRESS?? OMFG THE CUT AND THE SHAPE FORM WHATEVER? THE FLOWY SKIRT THINGY MOVEMENT IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN? honestly, jealous. genuinely, respectfully, ive always thought that type of cut of the neckline(?) right under the boobs is so hot and like it just looks so amazing whether its a dress or corset? It's one of those things idk how but it just works, uk? AND THE PANTS WITH THE SHIRT TUGGED IN?!?!?! coming for everyone's throats, as you should.

everyone hide your significant others because mon chou is coming and y'all suck and cant compare

second of all, i love your attitude and the vibe, you're absolutely adorable, i just cant think of a better word to describe you, you're genuinely adorably ethereal and I hope you'll never lose that, mon chou 🤍

third of all, IM SO FUCKING SAD AND PISSED MY LISTENING IN FRENCH IS FUCKING HORRENDOUS AND i sadly don't understand what you say in the second vid and its eating me alive, something about le cinture? I assumed its that you use a belt bc the pants are big? I literally am going to pull my hair out. One day i will be able to understand spoken French, but that day is sadly not today 😪but i will just to speak with you properly, mark this post and hold me accountable, please and thanks!

HOPE YOU'RE WELL AND STAYING HYDRATED AND MAGICAL!

THANK YOU!!!! That is so nice mon chou!!!! I agree with you I love it so muchhhhhh!!! I’ve never felt so comfy and pretty in my whole life really!!!!

I don’t really know how to describe the skirt, someone I met in Paris on Saturday said it looked like an apron and they weren’t wrong

Ahah! Well I’m preparing my new school year at college yk 😌😉

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

That is soo nice pls stop 🥺❤️❤️❤️❤️ You’re so adorable too mon chou!! La plus adorable des personnes que j’ai jamais rencontrée sur internet!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Finally, bb don’t worry I cut the video so it wouldn’t be too long so the last sentence doesn’t mean anything :) I actually just said “j’ai mis la ceinture sinon-…” But your guess was actually excellent! That’s exactly this !!! You’re learning and you’re actually really good!!!

I KINDLY BEG YOU TO STAY THIS AMAZING PERSON AND NICEST HUMAN ON EARTH ❤️❤️❤️

AND ALSO TO TREAT YOURSELF NICELY AND LOVE YOURSELF!!!! ILY

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joshhhhhhhhhhhhhhh · 4 years

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War of Underworld episode 11 was fine. That stuff with the ropes was pretty cool because the pugilist guy is like the only villain I somewhat care about so seeing him pray so hard for his guys to make it and then seeing our guys just charge in and cut the ropes, all hope for them lost, that was like, somewhat impactful. It’s the first time I’ve felt like it’s an actual war, because for once I feel like the “enemy side” are facing what are, to them, villains, cause like, nobody’s a hero in war. War heroes do exist obviously but like yeah nah it’s nothing glorious. About time that “War” in the title felt like it meant something. And then there’s the actual bulk of the episode’s content, see Yui I guess just observes Underworld and the Ocean Turtle’s computers and stuff so learns that like Vecta’s IRL squad have somehow opened Underworld up to America and now a bunch of American gamers are gonna log in to Dark Territory accounts and help in the war, not actually realising they’re technically killing people? Really got no fucking idea how they did that given I think the STL tech is the only way to log in and only Japan had that but I want to hope that’s just me not paying enough attention. To counter this, Sinon and Suguha manage to log into Underworld through some STL machines I think in some hospital related to Rath, and then Yui tells the rest of the Spurned Women’s Club and also Klein and Agil that they can log into Underworld too if they, convert their accounts? Sorry isn’t Underworld made completely from the ground up and unrelated to all that Seed tech? I might be misremembering but if that is the case, how in the fuck can account conversion happen? And even then how can they log into Underworld are they just able to fucking connect their AmuSpheres to the Sea Turtle through Bluetooth or something? I’ve got no idea what’s going on anymore, I’m just gonna read this as an excuse to throw everyone into Underworld because hey we’ve got all these iconic characters just sitting doing nothing when there’s a war going on and we need to get them involved somehow. Whatever, I’ll take it. Also because we need enough people to beat all these Americans that would I think have level 1 accounts anyway so what would they even be able to do against like a single one of you, we get a bunch of randos in ALO to join in too, like those race commanders and the Sleeping Knights, who I never thought we’d see again because they’re all accessories to Yuuki but she’s dead so, hey I’ll take it. Specifically we get them to join because no fucking joke Lisbeth gives us a “gamers rise up” speech. I thought this speech was funny, because haha gamer and also it was from fucking Lisbeth who is a total joke to me, but hey she got a character moment at all and that’s a good thing, and the speech itself had some talk about all of the themes throughout the SAO series and how Alice is kind of the culmination of those themes, which does make me wonder what the hell Unital Ring is supposed to be about. We’ll find out one day probably, it’s supposed to be the last arc to my knowledge and I doubt A-1 wouldn’t adapt it. But yeah Lisbeth speech kinda cool, she also talks about some SAO survivor stuff like their constant counselling and medication and how society looks down on gamers (hence gamers rise up) and other neat stuff, I’m genuinely happy that she got to do anything at all. Anyway end post.

#sao #23.12.19

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camomills · 5 years

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Title: Next Time Pairing: Silica/Sinon Fandom: Sword Art Online Word Count: 2,431 Summary: Shino visits Keiko in a snowy day. One of them has to open up so the other can, too. Notes: Made for SAO Pride Week - Day 2: Trust. I’m a bit late in posting this due to a power outtage in my neighborhood. Thanks to @thegayfromrulid for beta reading.

AO3 Link

It was snowing outside.

Keiko patted inside the tall kitchen cabinet and her fingertips gathered dust brushing against the wooden cover. Feeling the cold metal surface of the can she looked for, she grabbed it and closed the door. Following into the next room, she was greeted by a small, fluffy creature that rubbed itself against her legs and purred softly.

“Are you really being affectionate or is it just the food?” She asked her cat and almost expected an answer.

She unsealed the can with the jagged opener, sneering at the unpleasant smell oozing from the container. She dumped the wet contents on the tiny bowl that read “Pina”. The feline’s ears bristled upwards as it gracefully walked to the pot, stuffing its face with the kind of gross-looking food.

There’s my answer, she thought.

Crouching, she caressed her pet’s head, a sigh of defeat escaping her mouth.

“You really are the worst kitty ever, you know?”

The cat continued to munch on the contents of the bowl, unfazed by her accusations. Stepping into the next room and slouching on the sofa in the living room, she stared at the ceiling for a while.

A few hours earlier, her parents had once again invited her to a family gathering, and once again, she’d refused.

She hated seeing her family. They asked too many questions about her time in the floating castle, too many inquiries of years she’d rather forget. She loathed seeing her relatives and the judging stares that they directed at her, and no amount of scolding about “her growing reputation as a shut-in” could change that or convince her to go.

Unsavory thoughts of her time in Aincrad swirled in her mind, but she quickly swatted them away. Letting those feelings fester for too long tended to give her headaches, and that wasn’t the time for–

The doorbell rang.

Her heart skipped a beat. She knew who stood behind the door – they were expected, after all, and there weren’t many people who would visit her dormitory, especially at this hour.

She walked to the door, somewhat anxious. Looking through the peephole, she saw the distorted image of a girl, her black hair tied with white ribbons on both sides of her face. The girl behind the door rubbed her palms together, hands bumping into her half-rimmed glasses as white smoke released from her mouth. The harsh December winter bit into her, leggings and coats and all, and it didn’t seem like the snowfall outside would stop any time soon.

Keiko opened the door, the cold wind sending the hairs of her nape on end. Some warmth from the house’s heater escaped through the entrance. Keiko, whose pigtails were so customary both in the real and in the virtual world they could as well be her trademark, wore her hair down, which gave her a slightly more mature air than her usual juvenile looks. The one-size-too-large sweater featuring a cartoonish goldfish over her chest seemed to act as a proper counterweight to that, though.

She couldn’t help but notice how comically burly Shino looked in her three-- four? layers of clothing. Her wool muffler hid the lower half of her face and she looked like a human spring roll.

Waving a hand, the visitor greeted: “Hello, Silica.”

“Come on in, Sinon,” the shorter girl replied with a smile, and Shino obliged.

The two picked up the nasty habit of calling each other by their avatar names in real life, but at that point, they just couldn’t help it. Their time together in the virtual world made these sound much more natural to say out loud.

Closing the door after entering the house, Shino untied the muffler around her neck and placed it on the makeshift hanger by the entrance, along with her coat. Keiko went ahead to the kitchen to start heating the tea. Taking off her boots before stepping into the hallway, a noise similar to a softly revving engine distracted the bespectacled girl.

As she saw Keiko awkwardly shooing the cat away from the kitchen, she realized the source of the noise.

“Oh.”

Slowly and warily, the furry source made its way to her.

Shino stood still, watching as the cat circled around her once, then brushed its white fur against her black leggings the second time around. She felt a mix of confusion and joy from the unexpected greeter.

Shino’s call earlier was a bit sudden.

“Is it okay if I visit you today?”

That was her simple request upon calling. Keiko had invited her to her house once before, and had no reason to decline, but she couldn’t help but notice something off about Shino’s voice; her tired tone, the light rasping, the subtle panic embedded into it.

“Are you alright?” she’d asked.

A weak “yeah” succeeding a short pause was all Shino said. Keiko didn’t push her.

Shino often felt a bit distant, like she’d prefer biting her own tongue off to opening up. A past of hurt had forced her to build walls around herself. Keiko didn’t know how to convey that desire, or even if it was her place to do so…

But she wanted to tear those walls down.

“Sorry for the wait,” Keiko said, entering the room.

She quickly directed her gaze down to the creature resting on Shino’s lap.

“It’s okay,” Shino deadpanned, pointing at Pina. “This little guy kept me company.”

Keiko wasn’t able to hold back the sheepish chuckles that escaped her mouth. Shino squinted at the sudden laughter.

“Sorry, sorry,” Keiko replied, shaking her head side to side. “You just said that so seriously!”

Shino scratched her cheek at the odd explanation, the hint of a smile making a way to her lips.

“I’m surprised, too. He generally doesn’t just approach people like that.”

As if on cue, the cat ran away from Shino’s leg pillow, darting back to the kitchen. At that, Keiko again seemed oddly amused, trying to hold back her joy at that simple event.

It wasn’t uncommon for Keiko to laugh at seemingly trivial matters, and albeit she’d never admit, the dark-haired girl found joy in being accidentally amusing in this way. She never found humor to be her forte. Keiko’s promptness for laughter seemed twofold whenever Shino was around – not that the girl knew that, obviously. She just assumed that was part of Keiko’s constantly cheery personality.

Finally setting the tray on the kotatsu, Keiko sat beside Shino, a tinge of nervousness prickling them both as she did so.

The guest took hold of the cup before her, warm ceramic heating cold hands, the lemony smell of honey revitalizing her body. She raised the drink to take a sip, feeling as the hot drink soothed her light shivering and a familiar taste stuck to her tongue.

The cup made a dull sound as it was gently set on the table, a tense silence filling the room for several seconds. Keiko was the one to break it.

“So, is everything okay with you? Anything you wanted to talk about?”

Shino averted her gaze down to her cup, inviting silence once more. She swirled the contents of her mug, avoiding eye contact as she thought on how to answer.

“Nothing in particular. You mentioned I should come visit a couple of weeks ago, and today just happened to be a good day for me. You said something about a movie last time I was here?”

“Ah, I see! That uh, that makes sense.”

Her voice seemed clearer than during her call, but something still seemed off. Failing at getting a read on her again, Keiko pursed her lips.

Maybe this is none of her business. Maybe she should just watch a movie with her friend, and stop being so nosy…

Unsure or whether or not to push further, she took the laptop by the side of the table and opened it, both of them staring at the screen as Keiko tried to remember the name of a movie she mentioned in passing weeks ago.

It might be how long it’s been, or that she only brought it up because she wanted to watch it with the girl next to her, or, perhaps more likely, how worried she is about her friend right now, but she struggles with the name.

Catching a whiff of the scent of the tea again, she remembers – both the name of the movie and something else.

“You know,” Keiko started as she began her typing, “I have trouble sleeping sometimes. Nightmares.”

Shino turned back to her, shoulders instinctively tensing upon seeing Keiko’s melancholic smile.

“Ever since I had to leave home and come to Tokyo, well, I was– am, a bit scared. I barely left the house back then, and then the SAO incident happened, and then, just when I thought things would be normal again… The only school that would accept me was hours from home, and I had to move here by myself, away from my family, and they blame me for it, somehow.”

She said that with a cheery expression, along with a cracked voice that unmasked her grief.

Keiko knows this is a bit sudden, and maybe somewhat awkward, but she doesn’t know how else to get through to her.

Shino stared at her speechless for a second before nodding, prompting her to continue.

"And so every night since, I feel this… guilt that makes me want to hurl,” she continued, clasping her hands in a cute, unfitting way.

Shino felt an urge to reach out to the girl next to her to comfort her, but something inside herself stopped her, wouldn’t let her. She simply clenched her fists.

“But,“ Keiko continued, “you told me about this blend of tea, a couple of months ago, I think? And I know this is silly, but ever since I started trying it a while before bed it’s been better.”

Shino wore a puzzled expression hearing this. Keiko continued, a bit fidgety.

“Uh, well, not a lot better? Just not as bad! I mean, it’s just tea. And I mean, I know this is silly,” she stammered, “but I guess it helped. Tea sounds like one of those silly things people who don’t really… get it recommend, but there was something about it, small as it was, that helped me shuffle a little less in my sleep. So,” she sounded a bit embarrassed saying the last part, “it’s like you helped me, in a way.”

Keiko put her hand over Shino’s, amber eyes uncharacteristically piercing as she stared the sniper down, a firm, reassuring squeeze draped over Shino’s knuckles.

“Now, I get the feeling you asked to come here for a reason. Because you had something troubling you.”

A short silence followed, and Shino just stared, perhaps a little more stoic than intended.

“… And I guess, I want to help you, too?”

She thought it was a bit embarrassing making her comfort pitch following a talk about the magical wonders of tea for anxiety, but at the same time she couldn't think of anything better to say. She just figured opening up first would be the best route there.

Keiko started fumbling, scratching her neck awkwardly.

"W-well, not that it’s uh, my place to say any of that, or like you have to talk to me about anything! I’m just rambling here, really! Haha!”

Shino laughed sheepishly as Keiko’s ears turn pink through her clarification, and a small “it’s fine, it’s fine,” is all she said before going back to silence. Given a moment, she grasped Keiko’s hand in return, her calm voice breaking the silence.

“I get nightmares too,” she confessed. “And, honestly, I’m afraid of being alone with my thoughts for too long, being all by myself in my apartment.” She fiddled with her fingers a bit, as if to focus on something keep herself talking.

“I guess I just wanted to hear someone’s voice. Be with someone for a while. You were one of the first people who came to mind, really.”

Sinon thought back to a few months ago – before BoB, before meeting Kirito, before meeting Silica and his other friends, and she can’t imagine herself being so frank to someone like this. The fog in her mind that tried to close others off seemed thinner. Easier to navigate through, if only slightly.

Keiko wasn't quite sure how to react at first. She just squeezed the other girl’s hand tighter; to remind her that she’s there. She’s a little surprised Shino puts enough trust in her to tell her this – honored, in a way. She felt a prickling in her eyes that threatened to turn into tears, but she knew that wasn’t the time.

“I’m, I’m glad, that I can be a person like that for you. I understand how it can be, to feel like you can’t talk about these thoughts with anyone, but…”

She moves her face closer to Shino’s.

“… You don’t have to, you know. If you’re okay with me.”

Keiko took note of how smitten Shino’s gaze looked at her, and finally noticed their faces were almost touching. Both girls’ cheeks tinted with a faint red at that moment, hearts skipping the same beat.

Shino quickly averted her gaze from Keiko’s, who in turn chuckled at the display of bashfulness that seemed more and more common for the girl she once perceived as a cold markswoman.

A wandering hand reached out from behind Shino’s neck to her shoulder, gently pulling her closer to the girl sitting next to her. The warmth brought her a sense of tranquility.

“You don’t have to be so shy about those things next time, you know,” Keiko’s soft voice explained.

“I’ll keep that in mind… next time,” Shino replied warmly, the last part uttered with a certain longing to it. She playfully bumped her shoulder against Keiko’s.

Shino leaned in closer and laid her head against Keiko’s shoulder, making herself comfortable as they finally started the movie waiting on the nearby laptop’s screen.

They didn’t know how much time they had to be like that, hands interwoven under the heated table, cozily leaning onto each other. They did know that then, however, nothing could touch them – the swirling white cold dancing through the biting winter winds outside, the expectations of judging relatives, the foreboding loneliness of an empty apartment. That small dormitory, with its small laptop, was their bunker, offering them the chance to be together.

When they were together. Those were the moments they could allow their worries to melt away like driven snow.

#SAO #Sword Art Online #saoprideweek2019 #Fili writes #Silinon

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esdeem · 5 years

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Confession (Lisbeth x Sinon)

Lisbeth is haunted by her darkest memory from Aincrad, but she learns she might not have to face it alone.

A blade to his throat, a thin crimson damage line spreading across it. The man’s ugly mouth curling into a sinister sneer. The toe of his boot slamming against a pile of equipment on the ground.

“Beg me for his life, girl. Perhaps I’ll spare this one.”

“Run…”

A knife plunges.

A mace swings down.

The dagger clatters to the ground, nothing else left save two clouds of debris winking out of existence.

A green cursor turns red, blood dripping down from it onto her hands, staining her pristine white gloves.

As she falls to her knees, the spectral form of the man appears behind her, the grin even larger than before. He leans in and whispers a single word in her ear.

“Murderer…”

-===-

“Lisbeth! Are you okay?”

The young blacksmith bolted upright just before the door flew open, and she hugged the bedsheets to her chest. Her heart pounded as she stared at the slim figure silhouetted in the open doorway, clearly not either of her parents. It took her a moment to realize that she wasn’t in her bedroom, indeed not even in her real body. The pieces started to fit together. She was on the twenty-second floor of New Aincrad, in the forest home owned by her best friend.

A home that Asuna assured her would be empty.

Yet there stood the Cait Sith. Liz half expected her to have both arms folder over her chest as she leaned against the door frame. However, she stood frozen, her face a mask of concern. Despite the look, Lisbeth could only respond to her presence with a single question.

“What are you doing here?”

“You screamed,” Sinon said. “I had the crazy idea I should check on you.”

“No, I mean what are you doing in the house? Asuna told me it was going to be empty for the next few hours.”

“I dropped off some gear in one of the storage chests and needed to pick it up.” Sinon moved closer to the bed. “I know this place is cozy, but isn’t your real bed more comfortable?”

In the real world, her nightmares were accompanied by cold sweat, her cries waking up her family and causing them to fret even more than usual. It meant another visit with the school therapist, another round of prying questions that she refused to answer. They knew what she had done, of course. The ministry recovered enough data to see to that. But she’d never spoken it aloud, even during bad patches where the nightmares came nightly.

At least if she slept in full dive, she could avoid at least some of that.

“I just felt like sleeping in game. I did it for over two years, after all.”

“Asuna told me the other day that you were practically falling asleep in class. Have you been having trouble sleeping?”

“Maybe.”

“I’ll take that as a yes.” She moved closer to the bed. “Whatever you’re going through, it would be easier if you talked to someone about it. Asuna thinks the world of you, I know she’d be willing to listen.”

Lisbeth winced. “That’s just it. I don’t want that to change.”

Sinon smirked in reply. “If she can put up with everything Kirito has done, I doubt there’s anything you could do to push her away.”

Rather than laugh, Lisbeth shrank away. “Don’t be so sure.”

The smile vanished from the Cait Sith’s face and she sat down on the edge of the bed. “Liz, I haven’t known you as long as the others, but if there’s something bothering you… I’d like to help.”

Slowly, Lisbeth turned to the other side of the bed, away from Sinon. “Do you promise this would stay between us?”

“Of course.”

For a long while, Lisbeth remained silent. When she spoke again, her voice was weak.

“When I first signed into Sword Art Online, I was terrified. I’d never played a game like that before, and I thought for certain I’d die. In the middle of that panic, three warriors walked over. Their names were Hogun, Fandral and Volstagg, after characters from their favorite movie. They volunteered to help me and keep me alive. They encouraged me to become a blacksmith, and I always kept a picture of us together. I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for them. But I’ve never told Asuna, Kirito or anyone else about them.”

“Why not?”

“Because… they died. And they died because of me.”

“What do you mean?”

“Even after I started my smith shop, they still came by and helped out. After a while, I started making really good money. My reputation got bigger and bigger. I guess it caught the attention of the wrong people in the game.”

She paused, the words coming out harder now.

“One day, a man named Rugen showed up. Said I worked for him now, and that all the profits of my shop were his. If I challenged him on it, he’d kill me the first chance he got.” She started to shake as tears ran down her cheeks. “I… I told Hogun and the rest about it. They decided they were going to talk with Rugen. They were gone for two days… then I got a message from Rugen. Told me to meet him in one of the dungeons if I ever wanted to see them again.

“But… by the time I got there… only Hogun was left. I… should have done something more. But I… I… I didn’t know what to do. I just attacked without thinking. I wasn’t fast enough…”

She trailed off, unable to finish. She let the tears flow for a time, then took in a deep breath and continued.

“It took a week for my cursor to go green again. I hid in my smith shop the entire time. It wasn’t long after that I ran into Asuna again. I could never tell her what I’d done. If she knew the truth…”

She pulled the covers tight around herself, giving in to the tears. She expected Sinon to storm out of the room, to reject her for being too weak to save her friends, and for killing another player. The bed shifted and Lisbeth shut her eyes tight.

Then she felt Sinon behind her, one arm pulling her into a gentle hug.

“Tell her when you’re ready,” she whispered. “But don’t feel guilty for what you were forced to do. I know it hurts, but I’m certain you saved people’s lives. You didn’t have any other choice.”

“You really think so?”

“I do now. Some day, I’ll tell you why. But for now, I’m worried about you.”

Lisbeth felt a warmth in her cheeks. “O-okay. But I thought you had something else to do?”

“It can wait, if you need someone to be here with you.”

“M-maybe just for a little while.”

“As long as you need.”

Before long, however, Lisbeth drifted off to sleep with Sinon’s arm draped over her.

There were no nightmares.

-===-

Several hours later, Lisbeth awoke to find Sinon still behind her, asleep as well. She shook her gently, and soon the Cait Sith looked up at her with sleepy eyes.

“Oh. I must’ve dozed off too.”

“Guess you got comfortable, huh?”

Sinon’s ears shot straight up, her cheeks burning crimson. “Um, y-yeah. I guess so.”

The two sat up in the bed, looking at each other in awkward silence a moment.

“Thank you,” Lisbeth finally said. “For listening, and for staying with me.”

“As long as it helped.”

“It did.” Lisbeth’s lips curled into a smirk. “By the way, since you were kind enough to stay with me, would you mind if I told you something else that needs to stay between the two of us?”

Sinon blinked. “What is it?”

The answer came in the form of a kiss to Sinon’s cheek.

“Your in-game avatar’s almost as cute as you are in real life.”

Author’s Note - Forgive any typos, as I was really struggling with this prompt and didn’t want to do nothing but YuuAsu for the challenge. This is a pure first draft story, so I might come back to it as I like the concept if the execution isn’t quite there yet. I’ve always been curious who the three people we see in the photo with Lisbeth are, and I thought it might make for some interesting backstory.

Hopefully I wasn’t too terrible for my first time writing in Sinon’s voice, and maybe I can clean this up for posting on AO3 at some point!

#sword art online #lisbeth #sinon #lisbeth x sinon #saoprideweek2019 #first draft

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anony-mouse-writer · 5 years

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bnha fic recs part 1

okay so im putting this in a post because once again i went overboard while talking to @lachryphage hryphage and decided to make a post too long for chats. dont feel obligated to read all these. think of it as a reference for whenever you want to read something and not put effort into finding it

I sorted these.... kinda by tags? like i picked a tag that i found relevant and used that? so lots of these fall under multiple tags, but *shrug*. basically theres only minimal rhyme or reason to this. good luck sorting it out. (i didnt include the links because theres a lot and im lazy, sorry)

also i didnt comb thru for anything that has manga spoilers (like yesterday upon the stair) mostly cuz idk where the anime is rn, so... watch out for that? sorry

blue means its teacher centric

asterik means it one of my personal faves

general

- send endeavor to the shadow realm by pitviperofdoom *

- actuality by wonduhwoman *

dorm life

- downhill by eggstasy

- 2am knows all secrets by unbreakable_red_riot *

- katsuki vs friendship by downtownfishies

- in the business of parenthood by bonnia

- don’t paint me black when i used to be golden by humanities_angstiest

- the laundry room by dellsey

- cranky-rishima by purplepersnikitty

- number one hype man (and rival) by sammyd *

pre-canon

- present mic mixtape 2.0 by kurikuri

- after school special by kurikuri

future fic

- see all of it in bloom by aloneintherain *

- these days past by nivo

- two rings and two kids by kurikuri *

- slow it down (go easy on me) by newamsterdam *

- ragtag by sportsanimeruinedmylife

(warning that the second part of the series isnt finished yet)

- sugar (yes please) by plalligator *

- drunk history: heroes by sammyd *

- summer’s fool by izanyas

- when i’m gone by kittykittybobitty

- i call this place home by awechri

- fun at hero con by wolfsrainrules *

- team interview by thephilosophah

- starting over from ground zero by hyacintatropa, xenophonspeaks *

- vicious by feelslikefire *

dadmight/dadzawa

- i would understand by deafmic

- responsibility by deafmic

- katsuki drop by arc_fangirl_owov

- sense to protect by guardianlioness *

- could i but teach the hundreth part by terra_incognita *

character centric

(aizawa)

- running to stand still by kiyojo_michi

(jirou)

- get well soon by brickboat *

- observance by brickboat

(mina)

- self acceptance by sinon *

general romantic

- closer by mikewritesthings

- stitches by adreamingsongbird

- shadow tag by snap_nova

- dress my up by anxioussonic

- the road ahead by adastra615

- coffee cans, energy drinks, and other things by mackismagic *

- eraserhead’s number one fan! by mikewritesthings

- glass paradise by kurikuri

- cut from the same cloth by shanastoryteller

body swap

- sweet voice by kurikuri

- better late than never by bonnia

- hurt by deafmic

fake relationship

- we are so (not) married by mikewritesthings *

- whatever it takes by xenophonspeaks

- bikes, turkey, and dangerous blondes by endlesslyalways

- acceptance and denial by poteto

- heart stains on the carpet by cityboys

enemies friends lovers

- customer service 101 by kurikuri

- dont ask dont tell by ms_chunks *

- the devil blues by iknewaman *

wrong number

- bluebird by etherealbeing

- just a little advice by kurikuri

#bnha #mha #fandom #fanfic #sorry not sorry #did you know that tumblr has a post size limit?#i do now #mouse's life #op

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pauline-lewis · 5 years

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“I didn’t mean anything. I never meant anything.”

Toni Morrison, Sula

Je n’avais vraiment pas le temps de faire ce post alors je l’ai fait. Parce que sinon les choses s’empilent à l’intérieur, et ce n’est pas bon. Et aussi parce que j’ai lu Sula et que dans mon lit je me suis retrouvée à lire les phrases de Toni Morrison encore et encore, pour deux raisons : soit parce qu’elles avaient un sens immédiat qui me bouleversait, soit parce que je ne les comprenais pas et je les mâchais et remâchais. Toni Morrison est de ce genre d’autrices que j’aime qui joue avec le sens comme personne. C’est la reine de l’ellipse, la reine de la formule, la reine de la narration.

Quand j’ai interviewé Jenny Zhang nous avons fait un assez long aparté sur l’habitude que nous avions eu de nous identifier dans les romans aux personnages masculins. Cela m’a amenée à réfléchir à cette fascination que j’ai développé ces dix dernières années sur les récits d’amitié féminine, ces histoires que je n’ai pas lues quand j’étais moi-même adolescente.

Sula, donc, parle d’une amitié entre deux femmes, Nel et Sula. Elles ont été élevées très différemment et leur manière de voir la vie est opposée. Bien sûr chez Morrison il n’y a pas une extravertie/une introvertie, une sociable/une asociale... Les dynamiques qui agitent Nel et Sula sont bien plus profondes et complexes. Ce double roman d’initiation montre comment elles vont puiser chez l’autre, comment leurs expériences vont se faire écho, comment elles vont réagir face aux drames et au dilemmes moraux. Comment elles vont essayer, parfois, d’appuyer volontairement sur les plaies de l’autre. Il y a aussi une réflexion passionnante sur la manière dont la communauté, en jugeant une attitude sans la comprendre, peut détourner le destin d’une femme (que l’on retrouve dans le premier roman de Brit Bennett The Mothers). Morrison invite son lecteur à vraiment explorer toutes les facettes d’une situation en prenant en compte tous les éléments à sa disposition et notamment le contexte social et culturel. Elle raconte même l’histoire de la ville où ont grandi ses héroïnes. Je suis fascinée par la manière dont elle laisse dans sa narration la place pour le doute, pour la réflexion, la place pour ses personnages d’être aussi complexes. Jusqu’au dernier moment, rien n’est comme nous le pensions, aucun cliché ne s’avère vrai, toutes les facilités sont déjouées. Plus que recommandé, donc.

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Guys and dolls, Joseph L. Mankiewicz (1957)

Il y a déjà quelques temps, je suis allée au Christine 21 pour la rétrospective consacrée aux comédies musicales (<3). J’adore marcher seule dans le quartier latin après avoir vu un film et le ressasser dans ma tête. Même quand j’ai passé le film à côté d’une femme qui soupire fortement d’agacement car elle n’a pas compris que les acteurs allaient chanter.

De mon côté, le seul soupir que j’ai poussé pendant Guys and dolls de Mankiewicz c’était lorsque j’ai découvert que Marlon Brando chantait merveilleusement bien. (preuve ci-dessus) “Doc sait danser !” J’ai eu une grosse période Marlon Brando, à l’époque où j’écoutais Pocahontas de Neil Young en boucle, que j’avais fait un exposé sur lui et que je l’avais vu enlever son t-shirt dans A Streetcar Named Desire.

Tout ça pour dire que j’ai découvert Guys and Dolls qui souffre de très grosses longueurs mais qui est bourré de chansons catchy et de géniales idées de mises en scène. Sans mentionner le casting parfait (Frank Sinatra, Jean Simmons, Vivian Blaine) et les chorégraphies très avant-gardistes.

La storyline de Marlon Brando est assez vue et revue. Brando joue un bad boy qui accepte, suite à un pari, de séduire une femme coincée (sur ce plan, vraiment aucun cliché ne nous est épargné). Finalement ils tombent amoureux à Cuba (une sombre histoire de pari, franchement lisez la fiche wikipédia, le film cumule environ 45 quiproquo), ils se changent mutuellement, ils chantent à l’unisson et c’est beau. Et il y a cette séquence géniale et très drôle dans laquelle Jean Simmons est un peu éméchée et prouve le pouvoir de la comédie musicale : quand on chante, on se libère et on devient volontiers une autre personne. Ou une cloche.

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Julien Ledru, Along the Road I Had Traveled

Il y a une dizaine d’années j’étais obsédée par le disque de Will Oldham Ode Music et à l’heure où j’écris ces lignes je n’arrive pas à le retrouver et ça m’énerve. Mais ça n’a pas d’importance puisque ce disque est venu se réincarner dans un autre disque que je vous conseille de vous procurer à mesure que l’on s’enfonce dans un hiver incertain.

Un disque de dix titres aux noms mystérieux, qui mettent en place des boucles qui englobent. C’est un album qui appelle à la rêverie et aux promenades imaginaires dans des contrées qui n’existent pas. Il me fait ce même effet qu’Ode Music : il réussit à monter de toutes pièces un autre monde, avec simplement une guitare. C’est un trésor d’évocations poétiques. Écoutez-le !

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Soirée hommage à Jerome Robbins à l’Opéra de Paris

Le 31 octobre j’avais pris un billet pour l’hommage à Jérome Robbins à Garnier et j’étais hyper ronchon et il fallait se presser et le burger était froid et j’avais pas envie de sortir et j’avais mal au pied et j’avais envie de fuir l’ambiance guindée de Garnier et les sièges qui font mal au dos et pourquoi partir quand on est bien chez soi.

Et puis le rideau s’est levé et c’était Jerome Robbins, un tourbillon de sensualité (Afternoon of a Faun), de liberté (A Suite of Dances), de virilité fake de Broadway (Fancy Free). Et c’était surtout un moment de génie, avec Glass Pieces. Sur la musique qui rend fou de Philip Glass, j’ai été transportée par ce fond blanc quadrillé qui pique la rétine et par ces danseurs, tantôt petits robots qui collent au décor, tantôt corps élancés sans fin qui décrivent des arabesques... Peut-être qu’il ne faudrait jamais hésiter à sortir du cocon confortable de la maison si c’est pour se faire un reset. Quand toutes les étoiles sont alignées, la danse peut vraiment être la forme d’expression qui me touche le plus. Libérée pour toujours du poids des mots.

Rapido :

- Jeudi c’est le concert de Scout Niblett, je vais pleurer toutes les larmes de mon corps et ce sera bien. La dernière fois ça m’avait remuée. (un de mes premiers articles sur Tailspin !)

- Un article bien intéressant sur le générique de la formidable saison de la formidable série The Deuce.

- Si vous avez raté la rétrospective au Christine 21, la cinémathèque se met aussi à l’heure de la comédie musicale. Have you bought our zine ?

- Intéressantes perspectives sur le véganisme dans ce podcast

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redtutel · 6 years

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Thoughts on Anime I watched Winter 2018

A while back I made this post, so I decided to follow up on it with my thoughts since then

Black Clover: One of my favorite Youtubers, the Blockbuster Buster, once said this about why he loves horror/action comedies but doesn’t like Supernatural: “Once you’ve had steak, Burgers don’t taste as good.” And I’m starting to get that feeling with Black Clover with the more anime I watch. I still enjoy it, but it’s really paling in comparison to Fairy Tail in term of story, worldbuilding, characters and heart. I’ve watched too much of this show to drop it, though. I still love mages, after all.

Darling in the Franxx: I liked this show at first (even if the VERY non-subtle sexual metaphors made me uncomfortable), but it’s getting really, really good. The episode with Zorome in the adult city reminded me of Brave New World, and what can I say about Beast and the Prince that hasn’t already been said. I’ve realized I’m a sucker for action romances, so I love the relationship between Hiro and Zero Two. I don’t usually like romance drama, but i actually am invested in who will end up with who in this show (It must be Hiro/Zero Two, Goro/Ichigo and Zorome/Miku at least). It makes me want to get around to watching more Mech anime. I am excited for what will happen next.

Junji Ito Collection: The animation was terrible, but the stories and imagery really drew me in. It kind of reminded me of the Twilight Zone. Apparently this author did an adaptation of Frankenstein, and I want to read that.

Karakai Jouzu no Takagi-san: This show was adorable. I loved the relationship between Takagi and Nishikata. It’s a great portrayal of young love. I’ve seen some screenshots of the manga that wasn’t in the anime, so I hope there’s season 2

The Ancient Magus’s Bride: This show was absolutely beautiful. A Beauty and the Beast style story with a ton of European folklore. Chise is one of my favorite female anime character, and Elias is very fascinating and lovable, if a bit morally problematic. Kind of like Zero Two, now that I think about it. The music and animation was consistently amazing as well

How to Keep a Mummy: Another adorable show. The little monsters were so cute, and I loved their relationships with the human cast. It is the most pure anime ever.

Pokemon Sun and Moon: I’m watching the dub since I can officially watch it now that I have cable, and it uses the names of locations, characters and most importantly Pokemon I’m more used to. Anyway, the animation is great and really helps the comedy. It’s very different from the other seasons, in a good way. It’s not very accurate to the game’s story, but it still keeps the heart of Sun and Moon. I was a bit mixed on Lusamine at first, but I find it interesting how her personality is probably what she was like before being exposed to Nihliego’s neurotoxins. She does start acting like her game counterpart when she come in contact with the Ultra Beast. Lillie is still one of the greatest characters in the franchise.

Pop Team Epic: This absurd show made me feel happy whenever I watched it. Anything could happen, and it was always a joy to watch, even if I saw every segmen 4 times with 8 different voice actors (I watch both sub and dub). I hope we get season 2

Completed Marathons:

Fullmetal Alchemist 2003: Completed. It was utterly fantastic. The worldbuilding and storytelling was excellent. The characters were amazing, and I loved the bond the Elric Brothers had. I want to watch Brotherhood as soon as possible. It’s a classic for a reason, and I”m glad to have finally seen it

Sword Art Online: My sister and cousin love this show, and I agree. It’s an emotional rollercoaster. I got really swept up by Kirito and Asuna’s romance, and I loved how it showed people’s digital lives can be just as meaningful as their physical lives. The Aincrad arc was amazing. Fairy Dance was VERY uncomfortable, and I understand why people can never forgive the show afterwards. But I love everything else so much, so I still love this show. Gun Gale had some fantastic moments, and Sinon is my favorite character in the show. I can see why the setting was used in a Spin-off. Excalibur was fun but lasted a bit too long. And Mother’s Rosario was so beautiful and emotional, with some fantastic character development for Asuna and my current pick for saddest anime moment of all time. I love this show, and I don’t care what people say.

I admittedly haven’t finished any other marathons.

#anime #black clover #darling in the franxx #junji ito collection #karakai jouzu no takagi-san #the ancient magus bride #how to keep a mummy #pokemon #pokeani #pop team epic #fullmetal alchemist #sword art online

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nerdblogpl · 7 years

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Testing React components

If you're writing your front-ends in React, are you writing tests?

Testing is hard. We all know it. It's practically a separate skill that needs to be constantly trained and improved in addition to your usual programming abilities. That's why people find it scary, especially when they're coming from back-end environment. In this blog post I want to prove to you that testing your React frontend may actually be easy to set up and quite pleasant to do.

What this blog post does not touch is all the rules and best practices when testing. I'm afraid there are entire books dedicated to this topic and it takes years of practice to start noticing certain patterns on your own. I will, however, try to help you with beginning your journey.

Before we begin, let's discuss our tooling. We are going to use Jest as a platform. The biggest advantage of this one over other tools is that it's (almost) zero configuration - we can drop it into our project without extra complications and it will take care of configuring and compiling our tests with Babel for us. If you're using create-react-app, it's already added to the project so there's one less thing for you to worry about ;)

Other than Jest, I recommend amazing Sinon.js for all your stubbing, mocking and XHR faking needs and Enzyme for rendering your React components and poking them, checking how they work and why. The last ingredient of our secret testing sauce is enzyme-to-json - it facilitates seamless integration between Jest snapshot testing (more about that in a moment) and Enzyme.

Add all of these to your project and keep on reading:

yarn add --dev jest sinon enzyme enzyme-to-json

Different kinds of rendering

Before we start our test writing adventure, there's something you need to understand first. When we are testing our React components, we are not actually rendering them in the browser (OK, we do, but only in very specific kinds of tests). Often we don't even want to touch the DOM and generate HTML as it doesn't make sense and only makes our tests slower.

There are three ways we can render our components using Enzyme:

Shallow rendering

Shallow rendering is the kind of rendering that you want to use as often as possible. It takes your component and renders only the first layer, the native components (like <div></div>) and placeholders for other components with passed props but without actually rendering them (or running any lifecycle methods). It also doesn't touch DOM and opts for returning simple objects instead.

This is the best kind of rendering you want in your tests - it's fastest and it keeps your tests decoupled from their children components so if any of those children components break, rest of the tests are not making it harder to pinpoint the problem.

Since this kind of rendering does not generate DOM, it does not run all lifecycle methods so you don't have to worry about your componentDidMount crashing. This also means that if for some reason you're doing something other than additional manipulation of rendered output (for ex. fetching data in componentDidMount instead of componentWillMount), it will never get executed in your tests.

The entire API is available in documentation and you will probably want to keep this tab open until you're confident enough that you remember what you need from it.

Full rendering (mount)

If for some reason (for example: because you're testing a component that is wrapping external library, when you're testing browser events or when you want componentDidMount to run) you need to access to full DOM API, Enzyme has your back. Full rendering using mount() renders your component and all of its children while using JSDOM (browserless Javascript implementation of DOM) to make sure all those extra manual addEventListener work properly.

You might be inclined to use this as often as possible but unless you have a very good cause you should avoid doing full mount. It's much slower than shallow rendering and it introduces coupling between your parent component test and it's children. Imagine the situation where you always do a full mount and then introduce a bug in an <Icon/> component. Suddenly all your tests have crashed and it's much much harder to figure out where, when and why it happened.

The API is similar to shallow and it's also available in the documentation of Enzyme.

Static HTML rendering

This is the last kind of rendering. It uses ReactDOM static rendering underneath so it works like server-side rendering but the result is then wrapped in Cheerio.js library to make it easier to traverse and analyze the HTML result.

In this case only the example usage is in docs and you should consult cheerio documentation instead. I didn't feel the need yet to use this kind of testing but it might be useful in your particular case so it's good to know that you have this option.

Unwrapping components

One of the things that most people starting with testing components is tripping on are components that are wrapped in HOC (Higher-Order Component). If you're using something like Redux or MobX, you're probably used to exporting your component wrapped in either connect() or @inject. Those functions work by creating an extra component above yours that passes extra data with React contexts.

Unfortunately, this will cause a problem when using shallow rendering because it will only render an empty container and not the thing we want to test.

How can we avoid this problem? There are three ways:

Dive!

The solution most people try at first is to use .dive() to render one component deeper. Regrettably, this solution may be very confusing and throw hard to debug errors as it does not respect context being passed from the wrapping component. I would avoid this if possible.

Use escape hatches

I think almost every library I've seen so far has implemented some kind of escape hatch to give you access to the original component. The problem with this solution is that you always need to remember what the escape hatch was and in which order it should be applied. For example, if you use withRouter and inject on one component, you would have to unwrap it like this:

const TestedButton = Button.wrappedComponent.WrappedComponent

As you may imagine, this is not a perfect solution and it does not scale very well.

Export unwrapped component

My favorite method of dealing with this extra complexity is to export the component without any extra wrappers in addition to the one treated with inject, connect, withRouter etc.

The only real drawback is that we cannot use @decorators on entire class and we need to do the wrapping ourselves on export:

export MyComponent as UnwrappedMyComponent export default inject('store')(withRouter(MyComponent))

I do not believe this to be a huge hassle (the export is only a bit more verbose) and it allows us to test actual components, not coupling with the rest of the system.

All right, we have the theory, we have the links to documentation, we're ready to start writing tests.

But what exactly do we want to test? How do we want to do this? What kinds of tests are there?

Types of component tests

There are multiple naming conventions regarding tests so don't treat the following list as the one and only possible way of categorization.

Snapshot tests

These are the simplest to write tests that can be used for a quick (and brittle) way of having as much test coverage as possible. They work by serializing the result of rendering to a JSON file called snapshot and then, during future runs of the test, using it to compare with future render results to make sure they are unchanged.

import React from 'react' import { shallow } from 'enzyme' import toJson from 'enzyme-to-json' import { UnwrappedButton } from 'components/button' describe('Button', () => { it('matches the snapshot', () => { const component = shallow(<UnwrappedButton store={{ label: 'foo' }}/>) // this line is important expect(toJson(component)).toMatchSnapshot() }) })

I've mentioned that these tests are brittle. Because of the way they work, they are going to fail the moment anything in your component changes visually which means even fixing a typo or changing the className is going to break them. They are still very useful as a sanity check, especially when doing larger refactoring.

The other thing you need to be very careful about is that all props passed to your components will also be serialized. This means if you pass a huge object (like entire, non-mocked Store) during your tests, the resulting JSON might be huge which will make the test run (seemingly) forever - we had this problem where someone in a test passed a non-mocked store which kept an instance of HLS.js. The resulting JSON was 5 MB (!)

Rendering tests

Rendering tests are (in this case) tests that test... rendering. More specifically they're the more precise version of snapshot tests that render a component and then poke it around to check if props were passed correctly and all UI elements necessary were rendered and are available.

import React from 'react' import { shallow } from 'enzyme' import toJson from 'enzyme-to-json' import { UnwrappedButton } from 'components/button' describe('Button', () => { it('renders label', () => { const component = shallow(<UnwrappedButton store={{ label: 'foo' }}/>) expect(component.find('button').text()).toEqual('foo') }) })

They provide a better insight into what is happening inside the component which means they're more useful when working in teams - if someone needs to know how a component works they can just look at these and behaviour (more in a moment) tests and do an educated guess which is much harder in case of snapshots.

Behaviour tests

The most important of all tests and the ones that you absolutely have to write, even if you slack off and ignore all the other categories are behavior tests. They're the bread and butter of your application test suite - they test how your application behaves when user interactions happen.

const sandbox = sinon.createSandbox() describe('EmptyForm', () => { afterAll(() => sandbox.restore()) it('triggers form object onSuccess on submit', () => { const component = shallow(<EmptyForm/>) const instance = component.instance() const stub = sandbox.stub(instance.form, 'onSuccess') .returns(true) component.find('form').simulate('submit') expect(stub.calledOnce).toBe(true) }) })

Behaviour tests mostly simulate browser events and focus on checking if event handlers are attached properly. Side effects, like network requests, timers etc. should be mocked/stubbed to avoid test coupling.

There is an important caveat when writing behavior tests with Enzyme - you may think that .simulate() is simulating actual browser events but that is not entirely true. What it does is it finds the event handler and calls it, passing any extra data we provide to it. It does not support things like event bubbling or calling onChange when simulating keypresses. If you need any of those advanced features you need to code them yourself.

If it makes it easier to wrap your head around it, remember that those two are more or less equivalent:

component.simulate('change', { target: { value: 'abc' } }) component.prop('onChange')({ target: { value: 'abc' } })

Integration tests

Integration tests are testing communication between components. They are the ones that benefit most from the full mount as they need to actually run more than component in a nested tree and see how all parts fit in together. They are basically behavior tests but for groups of components.

describe('Article', () => { it('displays comments after clicking a show comments button', () => { const article = mount(<Article store={mockedStore}/>) article.find('ShowComments').simulate('click') expect(article.find('Comment').length).toBe(5) }) })

Most of the time every part of the integration test can also be written as a series of smaller behavior tests with behavior between them mocked. These tests should check if that mocked behavior is actually connected properly.

System tests

The last on our list are system tests. They are very similar to integration tests but instead of running in a simulated environment, they're are running in an actual browser. They are also, unfortunately, the slowest of the bunch so it's a good idea to separate them from your main test suite and launch for example only on CI server (instead of every time you change something).

import Nightmare from 'nightmare' describe('App', () => { it('renders the initial app', async () => { const nightmare = Nightmare() return nightmare .goto('http://localhost:4000') .type('#search_form_input_homepage', 'github nightmare') .click('#search_button_homepage') .wait('#r1-0 a.result__a') .evaluate(() => document.querySelector('#r1-0 a.result__a').href) .end() .then((link) => { expect(link).toBe('https://github.com/segmentio/nightmare') }) }) }); });

The system tests require an extra library that takes care of opening your application and passing your commands to the browser. The two that I found most interesting are Nightwatch.js that uses Selenium and Nightmare that runs on Electron. Historically Selenium was usually a bit tricky to properly configure but a lot has changed since PhantomJS got abandoned and Chrome headless became the new standard so your mileage may vary.

Configuring and running system tests can be complicated depending on the environment so I've released jest-str, a simple system test runner that contains preconfigured presets for popular boilerplates (at the moment of writing this blog post there are two - for create-react-app and razzle). If you want your favorite boilerplate to also get an official preset, feel free to send a PR :)

Great, we now know the different ways of testing components. If you've been careful with reading code examples, you probably get a general idea already of how we're doing it but let's get more specific.

Using Jest and Jest matchers

As you might've noticed already, Jest uses a spec-like syntax to define tests. They can be grouped using describe blocks for easier navigation, marking boundaries and behaviors being tested and for better error messages. The tests themselves are in it blocks and wrap tested values in expect().

There are 26 matchers which may seem overwhelming at first so when beginning your journey, focus on these 4:

toBe - checks for strict equality (===), useful for comparing numbers, true/false values, exact strings etc.

toEqual - performs deep value comparison, useful when checking for objects that have the same fields but are not necessarily the same object (ex. expect(myObj).toEqual({ foo: 1 }))

toThrow - checks if the function passed to expect() have thrown an exception (ex. expect(() => something()).toThrow(/fail/)), keep in mind to always create an anonymous function in expect() to avoid problems with scoping

toMatchSnapshot - used for snapshot testing

After your tests get more complex and you get the general gist of it, you will notice that you need more than what's above. It might be then very helpful to keep this documentation page around.

Using spies and stubs and sandboxes

Sinon.js gives us tools to observe the inner workings of our application and change it when necessary. Those tools are spies and stubs.

Spies

Spies are functions that keep track of how many times and with what arguments they were called. They can also be used as a wrapper around the original function and return its value. Spies are most useful for testing behaviors, for example, to check if the component has triggered an action in store.

I didn't want to artificially make this blog post longer so you should just check out the documentation to see exactly everything that's possible with them.

Stubs

Stubs are spies with controlled behavior. They include the same API as spies but they can also be used to return specific values, run their own fake function, call original function (or wrap it), throw errors, reject promises etc.

They are most useful when disabling parts of the application we do not want to test at the moment (XHR, complex operations, side effects etc) or when we want to make sure a certain path in code is being run (like making sure an if()somewhere gets true/false or when testing error handling).

Sandbox

Mocking functions inside stores is nice but what about test isolation? If we replace a method inside a pre-existing object with a stub, it may leak to the other tests, making them dependent on the order they were run. This is not an ideal scenario but fortunately, Sinon implements sandboxes.

A Sandbox is basically an orchestrating object that keeps track of all the spies and stubs and allows us to reset them after every call. It's usually set up like this:

const sandbox = sinon.createSandbox() describe('something', () => { afterEach(() => sandbox.restore()) // ... })

When using sandbox, remember to create spies and stubs using sandbox.spy() / sandbox.stub() instead of sinon.spy() and sinon.stub().

Stubbing network requests

There are multiple techniques to achieve that, depending on the library you're using for network requests.

If you're using something like $.ajax then check out Sinon's fake XHR server.

For axios you might be inclined to use moxios, the official testing library from the same author. I wouldn't recommend it as moxios is rarely updated and lacks some features that can be necessary for more complex flows. Personally, I use axios-mock-adapter as it has much better and more powerful API.

Finally, if you're using Fetch API, consider fetch-mock. It has a feature set similar to axios-mock-adapter. Keep in mind that fetch() is a browser API and you will a polyfill like isomorphic-fetch to make it work!

General guidelines on testing

There are a couple of things that you should remember during the tests. If you don't, you will trip and hurt yourself and drop testing front-ends again.

Avoid testing wrapped components. I mean it, always sure your components are unwrapped, otherwise, you will encounter a world of pain and arcane errors. This is where most of the people I've talked with bounced off testing altogether.

The only good moment to test wrapped components is during integration tests with full mount.

Mock your stores whenever possible. It's tempting to just instantiate your entire Store class in tests but it introduces tight coupling to the current state of your store and makes your tests both tightly coupled to it and, in case of complex apps, significantly slower.

Keep tests simple. You may be tempted to test for 10 different things in one test case (it will be faster!) but it will once again make your tests more brittle and prone to failing. It's better to have laser focus so every time your test suite fails, you have a clear message of what went wrong, where and why.

Group your tests. There's nothing worse than a huge file full of ungrouped, unordered tests. Be careful not to overdo it though, one or two levels of nesting are usually more than enough.

Keep your tests in one describe() block. It will make your life easier with before / after blocks, especially when it comes to sandboxing or stubbing requests.

And that's it! As you can see, testing your application components is not that hard and hopefully, you should have a better idea on where to begin now :)

Keep your code bugs free!

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adherantnerdhi · 7 years

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Trop En translation ep1 #TropEnSubs no download providing, asking google how to do SRT

1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:37,037 {\pos(380,60)}EBro pups DECIPHER GANG Subs CE FR-EN Charlie proof reading orphantrash Sync AN

2 00:00:37,037 --> 00:21:12,313 {\pos(380,15)}EBro pups DECIPHER GANG

3 00:00:07,215 --> 00:00:08,342 - Allô! Bonjour !

4 00:00:11,261 --> 00:00:12,471 - Merci. Thanks

5 00:00:12,513 --> 00:00:14,181 - Bonne journée. - Merci. - Have a good day - Thank you

6 00:00:16,642 --> 00:00:18,060 (soupir) (sigh)

7 00:00:19,937 --> 00:00:23,774 (musique rythmée) (music)

8 00:00:30,531 --> 00:00:33,367 (soupir) (sigh) (♪♪♪)

9 00:00:33,408 --> 00:00:37,037 (Elle chante.) (she sings)

10 00:00:38,914 --> 00:00:40,999 - C'est vraiment un honneur, Jacques. - It truly is an honour, Jacques

11 00:00:41,041 --> 00:00:42,668 Oui, c'est bon, ça. Yes, that's it.

12 00:00:42,709 --> 00:00:43,919 Oui, un honneur. Yes, an honour

13 00:00:43,961 --> 00:00:45,212 (sonnerie et vibration) (ringing and vibration)

14 00:00:46,212 --> 00:00:47,212 (soupir) (sigh)

15 00:00:45,912 --> 00:00:49,012 {\pos(35,240)}ANAïS Be there soon! We celebrate this!

16 00:00:51,218 --> 00:00:52,469 - Ha! ha! ha! - Ha ! Ha ! Ha !

17 00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:54,846 - Hé! - Hi !

18 00:00:54,888 --> 00:00:56,473 On dirait...Ça me fait drôle. It looks like... It's funny

19 00:00:56,515 --> 00:00:58,559 Je sais pas, je t'imagine pas à la retraite. I don't know, I can't imagine you retreated.

20 00:00:58,600 --> 00:01:01,353 - Oui, ma femme dit la même chose. Yes, my wife says the same.

21 00:01:01,395 --> 00:01:04,189 On a beaucoup discuté, Isabelle. We talked a lot Isabelle.

22 00:01:04,231 --> 00:01:06,024 Le CA vient de voter, là. The board just voted, Isa.

23 00:01:06,066 --> 00:01:07,359 - Oui. Yes.

24 00:01:07,401 --> 00:01:10,736 - C'est... Myriam Champagne It's... Myriam Champagne

25 00:01:10,736 --> 00:01:12,630 qui va prendre ma place au poste de direction. Who's going to take my seat at the board.

26 00:01:14,072 --> 00:01:16,491 - Ha! Pardon? Ah ! Sorry?

27 00:01:16,533 --> 00:01:19,536 - Il te manque juste quelques années d'expérience. You just need a few more years of experience.

28 00:01:19,578 --> 00:01:21,037 - Bien, voyons! Oh, come on!

29 00:01:21,079 --> 00:01:22,789 Jacques, je veux dire... I mean, Jacques...

30 00:01:22,789 --> 00:01:25,041 La réputation de La Station, c'est moi! Our reputation at The Station, it's me !

31 00:01:25,083 --> 00:01:26,751 Les meilleurs coupsdes dernières années, The best deals of the last years,

32 00:01:26,751 --> 00:01:28,044 c'est moi qui les ai faits. I made them !

33 00:01:28,086 --> 00:01:29,713 Elle est parfaite, mon expérience. My experience is perfect.

34 00:01:29,754 --> 00:01:32,549 - Moi, j'ai très hâte de travailler avec toi, Isabelle. I look forward working with you Isabelle.

35 00:01:35,385 --> 00:01:38,046 - OK, je comprends. Il me manque juste un tailleur Chanel Oh I get it. I just need a Chanel suit

36 00:01:38,046 --> 00:01:40,599 et un stylo à 600 piastres, c'est ça? And a 600$ pen, is that it?

37 00:01:40,640 --> 00:01:42,042 - Regarde, tu es toute jeune encore. Look, you're still very young.

38 00:01:42,042 --> 00:01:44,394 Ton tour va venir, c'est sûr! Your turn will come, without doubt !

39 00:01:44,404 --> 00:01:46,004 Le CA a été impressionné par son CV. The board was impressed with her resume.

40 00:01:46,004 --> 00:01:47,981 Je n'y peux rien. - Et le mien! I can't do anything about it. - and mine !

41 00:01:47,981 --> 00:01:49,441 Mon CV à moi, Jacques! My resume, Jacques !

42 00:01:49,441 --> 00:01:51,036 Ça fait neuf ans que je travaille pour toi, I've been working for you for 9 years,

43 00:01:51,036 --> 00:01:53,036 que je fais 1 000 heures par semaine, I've been doing a thousand hours a week,

44 00:01:53,036 --> 00:01:55,072 et je me contente de mon petit salaire de coordonnatrice, I'm happy with my small wage of coordinator,

45 00:01:55,072 --> 00:01:57,032 et je fais pas de chicane et je dis jamais rien, I don't make any trouble, I never say anything,

46 00:01:57,532 --> 00:01:59,576 pendant que toutes mes amies s'achètent des chalets While all my friends buy themselves cabins

47 00:01:59,576 --> 00:02:01,077 et des chars hybrides and hybrid cars

48 00:02:01,077 --> 00:02:02,746 et des petits chats pas d'allergènes... and cats without allergens...

49 00:02:02,746 --> 00:02:04,581 C'est à mon tour, Jacques! My turn has come, Jacques !

50 00:02:04,581 --> 00:02:06,541 - Il faut que tu comprennes. You need to understand.

51 00:02:06,583 --> 00:02:08,960 Le milieu culturel est en pleine crise! The cultural field is in crisis !

52 00:02:09,002 --> 00:02:11,129 Myriam est hyper qualifiée! Myriam is overqualified!

53 00:02:11,171 --> 00:02:13,089 Elle a travaillé à Toronto, à New York... She woked in Toronto, in New York...

54 00:02:13,131 --> 00:02:14,716 - Quand ça? En 1988? When? In 1988?

55 00:02:14,758 --> 00:02:16,968 - Elle a déjà travaillé avec Whitney Houston! She worked with Whitney Houston !

56 00:02:17,010 --> 00:02:19,137 - Jacques, elle est morte, Whitney Houston! Jacques, she's dead, Whitney Houston !

57 00:02:20,930 --> 00:02:22,599 - Pourquoi t'en profiterais pas Why wouldn't you take the opportunity

58 00:02:22,641 --> 00:02:24,059 pour t'occuper de ta vie personnelle? To take care of your personal life?

59 00:02:24,100 --> 00:02:26,811 Avoir une famille, un bébé! Have a family, a baby !

60 00:02:28,881 --> 00:02:32,025 - là, je vais m'en aller, sinon je vais te frapper. Now, I'm gonna go, before I hit you.

61 00:02:36,821 --> 00:02:37,947 - Ah! Ah !

62 00:02:37,989 --> 00:02:42,952 (indicatif musical) (music)

62 00:02:42,952 --> 00:02:49,001 EBro pups DECIPHER GANG Version mad pup Subs CE FR-EN Charlie proof reading orphantrash Sync AN

63 00:02:50,001 --> 00:02:51,028 (soupir) (sigh)

64 00:02:51,028 --> 00:02:54,172 {\pos(230,280)}-Mais, Ça va te donner le temps de t'occuper de ta vie personnelle. But, It'll give you time to take care of your personal life..

65 00:02:54,856 --> 00:02:56,758 J'ai rien dit. I didn't say anything.

66 00:02:56,800 --> 00:02:58,068 - Je suis tellement humiliée, Manu. I feel so humiliated, Manu.

67 00:02:58,068 --> 00:03:00,303 J'ai oublié de te dire merci d'être venue. I forgot to thank you for coming.

68 00:03:00,345 --> 00:03:01,638 Merci! Thank you !

69 00:03:01,680 --> 00:03:02,823 - C'est rien, ça me donne une raison It's okay, it gives me an excuse

70 00:03:02,823 --> 00:03:04,557 de partir tôt du bureau. To leave the office.

71 00:03:04,599 --> 00:03:05,642 - Ha! Ha !

72 00:03:05,684 --> 00:03:08,687 Oh! Mon cadeau du week-end! Oh ! My week-end present !

73 00:03:10,355 --> 00:03:13,149 - Criss que c'est loin, le Saguenay! Hell, Saguenay is so far away !

74 00:03:13,191 --> 00:03:14,234 Ha! ha! Ha! Ha ! Ha ! Ha !

75 00:03:14,275 --> 00:03:16,444 - (en choeur): Allô! (together) Hi !

76 00:03:16,486 --> 00:03:18,488 - Bravo, ma soeur! Es-tu rendue avec un grand bureau? Congrats sister ! Do you have a bigger office?

77 00:03:18,530 --> 00:03:20,573 Tu as combien d'employés? How many employees do you have?

78 00:03:20,573 --> 00:03:22,409 Il y a une collègue que tu haissais There was a colleague you hated,

79 00:03:22,409 --> 00:03:24,411 que tu vas pouvoir juste sacrer dehors? Raconte-moi tout. Can you fire her? Tell me everything.

80 00:03:24,452 --> 00:03:27,247 - Le CA m'a pas choisie. - Hein? C'est quoi, la joke? The board didn't choose me. - What? Is this a joke?

81 00:03:27,288 --> 00:03:28,998 - Non, c'est pas grave. On va la boire pareil. - No, it's alright. We'll drink it anyways.

82 00:03:29,040 --> 00:03:31,668 - Mais comment ça, t'as pas eu la job? - But how come you didn't get the job?

83 00:03:31,710 --> 00:03:33,128 - Tabarouette! - Damn !

84 00:03:33,128 --> 00:03:35,338 Emménages-tu chez nous, toi? Are you moving in with us?

85 00:03:35,380 --> 00:03:36,840 - Bien, aidez-moi! Well, help me!

86 00:03:36,881 --> 00:03:38,925 Ça se déloadera pas tout seul, ce stock-là! It won't move itself !

87 00:03:44,347 --> 00:03:46,224 Tu aurais dû me le dire, You should have told me,

88 00:03:46,266 --> 00:03:47,851 je t'aurais fait de la place. I would have made you some room.

89 00:03:47,851 --> 00:03:50,019 - Je le savais pas à l'avance que je lâcherais ma job. I didn't know I was gonna quit my job.

90 00:03:50,019 --> 00:03:52,147 - T'étais pas dans l'immobilier à ton compte, toi? Weren't you in real estate?

91 00:03:52,147 --> 00:03:54,190 - Oui, mais ç'a pas duré. Yes, but it didn't last.

92 00:03:54,190 --> 00:03:56,535 Après ça, j'ai été gestionnaire de réseaux sociaux Then, I was a social media manager

93 00:03:56,535 --> 00:03:59,070 pour un start-up à Toronto, mais je me suis tannée, for a start-up in Toronto, but I got bored,

94 00:03:59,070 --> 00:04:01,448 donc je suis retournée chez mes parents au Saguenay. So I went back to my parent's, in the Saguenay.

95 00:04:01,448 --> 00:04:03,408 Finalement, je me suis trouvé une job en pub, Then I found a job in marketing

96 00:04:03,408 --> 00:04:05,535 mais finalement, ils comprenaient pas mon style, But they didn't understand my style

97 00:04:05,535 --> 00:04:07,203 donc j'ai démissionné et puis, me voilà! So I quit, and here I am !

98 00:04:07,203 --> 00:04:09,706 - Papa t'a laissé partir avec? Moi, il n'a jamais voulu. Dad let you leave with this? He never allowed me to.

99 00:04:09,706 --> 00:04:11,499 - Il ramollit, papa. Dad's getting softer.

100 00:04:11,499 --> 00:04:13,460 - J'aimerais ça, travailler en pub, je pense. I think I'd like working in marketing.

101 00:04:13,460 --> 00:04:15,003 - Bien là, avocate, c'est cool, il me semble. Well, advocate is pretty cool, I think.

102 00:04:15,003 --> 00:04:16,546 Tu es super utile. Tu défends du monde. You're very useful. You defend people.

103 00:04:16,588 --> 00:04:18,882 - Manu ne sait plus si elle a l'âme d'une avocate. Manu doesn't know if she has the soul of an advocate anymore.

104 00:04:18,923 --> 00:04:20,884 - Bien, si t'es pas bien dans ta job, Well if you don't like your job,

105 00:04:20,925 --> 00:04:22,552 tu changes de job et ça finit là. Change it, end of the story.

106 00:04:22,594 --> 00:04:25,221 - Non, c'est pas si simple. Je peux pas tout lâcher de même. No, it's not that simple, I can't just drop everything.

107 00:04:25,263 --> 00:04:27,390 - Bien... oui. Well, yes you can.

108 00:04:29,184 --> 00:04:30,935 Hé! On le boit, ce champagne-là? Hey ! Do we drink this champaign?

109 00:04:30,977 --> 00:04:32,854 - Maudite bonne idée, ça! That's a f*cking good idea !

110 00:04:32,896 --> 00:04:35,398 - Peux-tu croire? J'avais déjà écrit mon speech de directrice. Can you believe it? I had already written my speech for the job.

111 00:04:35,440 --> 00:04:37,317 Il faut être conne! - Bien non! I'm stupid ! - No !

112 00:04:37,358 --> 00:04:39,027 - Il faut que j'aille au lancement I need to go to the premiere

113 00:04:39,068 --> 00:04:40,820 de la programmation demain, je vais mourir de honte! Of the planning tomorrow, I'm going to die of embarrassment.

114 00:04:40,862 --> 00:04:43,156 - Bien non! On va être là, nous autres, toute la gang. No you won't ! We will be there, all of us !

115 00:04:43,198 --> 00:04:44,532 - Toute la gang? All of you?

116 00:04:44,574 --> 00:04:45,909 - Bien oui, toute la gang. Yeah, all of us.

117 00:04:45,950 --> 00:04:47,410 - Pas Marc-Antoine? Not Marc-Antoine?

118 00:04:47,452 --> 00:04:49,329 - Non, non. Voyons! No, no, come on !

119 00:04:49,370 --> 00:04:51,414 C'est moi qui étais là pour la consoler. I'm here to comfort you.

120 00:04:51,456 --> 00:04:53,583 Laisse-moi te dire que je sais qu'elle est pas prête à le voir. Let me tell you, she's not ready to see him.

121 00:04:53,625 --> 00:04:55,335 De toute façon, elle ne le voit plus. Anyways, she doesn't see him anymore.

122 00:04:55,376 --> 00:04:58,129 Même mon chum ne le voit plus. Il dit que depuis qu'il est... Even my boyfriend doesn't see him anymore, since he's...

123 00:04:58,171 --> 00:05:01,841 C'est ça, qu'il est en genre de fusion avec... chose, là. Well, since he's in fusion with ...?her, there.

124 00:05:04,469 --> 00:05:06,429 - Ah! - OK, woh, woh! Ah ! - Ok, who, who !

125 00:05:06,471 --> 00:05:07,722 Woh, woh! Sophie! Woh, Woh, Sophie !

126 00:05:07,764 --> 00:05:08,932 - Regarde ce que tu me fais faire! Look what you've done !

127 00:05:08,973 --> 00:05:10,391 - Mais j'ai rien fait. But I didn't do anything !

128 00:05:10,433 --> 00:05:11,976 - Bien non! Bien non! Toi, tu fais jamais rien. No, no, you never do anything, do you?

129 00:05:12,018 --> 00:05:13,436 T'es jamais responsable de rien. You're never responsible for anything.

130 00:05:13,478 --> 00:05:15,688 - OK, attends, je comprends pas. Ta bébelle marche pas. Ok, wait, I don't get it.

131 00:05:15,730 --> 00:05:17,607 Tu pètes une crise, c'est moi qui t'écoeure? You're having a crisis, and I'm the one who's pissing you off?

132 00:05:17,649 --> 00:05:19,567 - Tu te crisses de tout, Marc-Antoine! You don't care about anything, Marc-Antoine !

133 00:05:19,609 --> 00:05:21,444 - OK, OK, on se calme! Ok, ok, let's calm down.

134 00:05:21,486 --> 00:05:23,112 C'est ridicule. On va pas... That's ridiculous. We're not going to..

135 00:05:23,154 --> 00:05:24,656 On va pas se chicaner pour ça, hein? We're not going to argue for this, are we?

136 00:05:24,697 --> 00:05:25,949 C'est ridicule! That's ridiculous !

137 00:05:25,990 --> 00:05:27,617 Je pense que là, c'est juste... I think it's just that...

138 00:05:27,659 --> 00:05:29,244 Tu es fatiguée. Ça arrive. - Je pense pas You're tired. It's okay. - I don't think

139 00:05:29,285 --> 00:05:31,287 que tu aies les compétences pour me dire comment je me sens. You can tell me how I feel.

140 00:05:31,329 --> 00:05:33,706 - Pourquoi tu restes avec moi si je suis si cave que ça? Why are you still with me if I'm so annoying?

141 00:05:33,748 --> 00:05:36,251 - Sais-tu ce qui m'écoeure le plus? Do you know what pisses me off the most?

142 00:05:36,292 --> 00:05:37,752 - Non. No.

143 00:05:37,794 --> 00:05:39,796 - C'est que tu penses que je m'en rends pas compte. It's that you think I don't see it.

144 00:05:39,838 --> 00:05:41,089 - Te rendre compte de quoi? You don't see what?

145 00:05:41,130 --> 00:05:42,298 - Que tu m'aimes pas, Marc-Antoine. That you don't love me, Marc-Antoine.

146 00:05:42,340 --> 00:05:43,633 - Arrête! Stop this !

147 00:05:43,675 --> 00:05:45,218 - Tu aimes mon cul, tu aimes mon âge, You like my ass, you like my age.

148 00:05:45,260 --> 00:05:46,886 tu aimes ça me flasher dans les partys. You like showing me at parties.

149 00:05:46,928 --> 00:05:47,971 - Oui. Yes.

150 00:05:48,012 --> 00:05:49,806 - Mais tu m'aimes pas. But you don't love me.

151 00:06:01,359 --> 00:06:03,444 je t'aime. I love you.

152 00:06:03,486 --> 00:06:06,114 - Non, c'est demain... No, it's tomorrow.

153 00:06:06,155 --> 00:06:06,155 - C'est lui, Romain? Is that him, Romain?

154 00:06:06,155 --> 00:06:07,740 - Hum-hum. Hum-hum.

155 00:06:07,782 --> 00:06:09,534 - Il est cute. Pourquoi tu couches pas avec, déjà? He's cute. Why don't you sleep with him?

156 00:06:09,576 --> 00:06:11,494 - Parce que c'est un réalisateur. Because he's a director.

157 00:06:11,536 --> 00:06:12,996 player! A player !

158 00:06:13,037 --> 00:06:14,956 - Oui. Comme là, il va venir nous parler juste pour voir Yes. Like here, he's going to talk to us

159 00:06:14,998 --> 00:06:16,708 s'il peut se pogner la nouvelle voisine. To see if he can sleep with the new neighbour.

160 00:06:16,749 --> 00:06:18,334 - Nouvelle voisine! New neighbour !

161 00:06:18,376 --> 00:06:19,919 Salut! Romain. Hi ! Romain.

162 00:06:19,961 --> 00:06:21,838 - Anaïs. Anaïs.

163 00:06:21,880 --> 00:06:23,381 - Est-ce que vous êtes des soeurs? Are you sisters?

164 00:06:23,423 --> 00:06:25,758 Ah oui, oui, oui, les yeux, là! Oh, yes, yes, the eyes !

165 00:06:25,800 --> 00:06:27,302 Ayoye! OK. Ok !

166 00:06:27,343 --> 00:06:29,053 Ha! Malade! Ha ! Weird.

167 00:06:29,095 --> 00:06:30,346 Hé, je vais vous aider! Hey, I'm gonna help you out.

168 00:06:30,388 --> 00:06:31,723 Ça fait que... so...

169 00:06:31,764 --> 00:06:33,349 - C'est pas mon problème... it's not my problem...

170 00:06:33,391 --> 00:06:34,767 - Tu vois? Serviable, you see? Helpful,

171 00:06:34,809 --> 00:06:36,519 ça fait pas partie de ses qualités normalement. That's not part of his qualities usually.

172 00:06:36,561 --> 00:06:38,229 - Non? - Nope! No? - No!

173 00:06:42,901 --> 00:06:44,861 - Donc, tu travailles avec ma soeur? So you work with my sister?

174 00:06:44,903 --> 00:06:46,696 - Oui. J'ai des gigs à La Station des fois. Yes, I have shows at The Station sometimes.

175 00:06:46,738 --> 00:06:48,406 Bien, quand je tourne pas, là. When I'm not shooting.

176 00:06:48,448 --> 00:06:52,327 - Je trouve ça sexy, moi, un gars qui fait des films. I think it's very sexy, a director.

177 00:06:52,368 --> 00:06:54,913 stiff que ta soeur. Ça se peut? Your sister is tensed, isn't she?

178 00:06:54,954 --> 00:06:57,290 - Ha! Je pense que tu connais juste mal Isa. Ha ! I think you just don't know Isa.

179 00:06:57,332 --> 00:06:58,833 - Ah oui? - Hum. - Is that so? - Hum.

180 00:06:58,875 --> 00:07:00,452 - Ça te tenterait qu'on se fasse un petit souper ensemble Would you like to have dinner sometimes?

181 00:07:00,452 --> 00:07:02,045 ici à un moment donné? Anytime?

182 00:07:02,086 --> 00:07:04,005 - Ah oui, vite de même, là, toi? Oh right, you don't lose time, do you?

183 00:07:04,047 --> 00:07:05,632 - Non, mais je te demande pas en mariage, là. I'm not proposing.

184 00:07:05,673 --> 00:07:07,842 Je te parle d'un petit souper relax, une bonne bouffe, I'm just talking of a nice dinner, quiet, nice food...

185 00:07:07,884 --> 00:07:09,552 une bonne bouteille de vi n. A good bottle of wine...

186 00:07:09,594 --> 00:07:11,638 - Oui, oui, je sais c'est quoi, un souper. Yeah yeah, I know what a dinner is.

187 00:07:11,679 --> 00:07:12,847 - Entre amis, là. Between friends.

188 00:07:12,889 --> 00:07:14,223 - Bien oui, en amis, voyons! Obviously, between friends !

189 00:07:14,265 --> 00:07:15,558 Ça fait deux minutes qu'on se connaît. We've met two minutes ago.

190 00:07:15,600 --> 00:07:17,060 En amis! - Bien oui! Between friends ! - Yes !

191 00:07:23,074 --> 00:07:24,984 - En tout cas, moi, si ma soeur venait s'installer If my sister was moving in like this

192 00:07:24,984 --> 00:07:27,904 sans s'annoncer, pas sûre que je triperais tant que ça. Without warning, I wouldn't be so happy about it.

193 00:07:27,946 --> 00:07:30,365 - Ça tombe bien, t'en as pas, de soeur. Well it's good that you don't have a sister then.

194 00:07:36,537 --> 00:07:37,956 - Quoi? What?

195 00:07:40,166 --> 00:07:41,334 - Rien. Nothing.

196 00:07:44,253 --> 00:07:46,089 - Tu la veux ou, la poche? Where do you want this bag?

197 00:07:46,130 --> 00:07:47,632 Ici? Here?

198 00:07:49,092 --> 00:07:50,468 - Cheers! Cheers !

199 00:07:50,510 --> 00:07:52,971 (rires) (laughing)

200 00:07:59,978 --> 00:08:02,772 Oui, mais je viens de l'appeler et elle me répond pas! Yes, but I just called her, and she's not answering!

201 00:08:02,814 --> 00:08:05,024 - On a fini de l'installer super tard, maman. We finished installing it very late, mum.

202 00:08:05,066 --> 00:08:06,651 Elle doit dormir encore. She must be sleeping.

203 00:08:06,693 --> 00:08:08,444 Ah, bien, justement... Ah, well, the thing is...

204 00:08:08,486 --> 00:08:09,654 Quoi? What?

205 00:08:09,696 --> 00:08:11,114 - Non, justement, elle dort. No, exactly, she's sleeping.

206 00:08:11,155 --> 00:08:12,949 Je l'entends. Tu sais comment elle ronfle fort. I can hear her. You know she snores.

207 00:08:12,991 --> 00:08:15,326 - Toi, ça te dérange pas trop qu'elle s'installe comme ça? You don't mind that she's moving in like that?

208 00:08:15,326 --> 00:08:17,286 - C'est sûr que j'aurais aimé qu'elle me le dise avant, Well, I wish she would have told me before.

209 00:08:17,286 --> 00:08:18,621 mais c'est correct. But it's okay.

210 00:08:18,621 --> 00:08:20,123 Je suis contente de l'avoir avec moi. I'm glad she's here with me.

211 00:08:20,123 --> 00:08:21,749 - C'est ça qu'on s'est dit. That's what we thought.

212 00:08:21,749 --> 00:08:23,960 Et Marc-Antoine plus là, ça va te désennuyer. And Marc-Antoine isn't here anymore, she'll keep you company.

213 00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:26,004 - OK, je lui dis de te rappeler dès qu'elle se lève, OK? OK, I'll tell her to call you back, as soon as she wakes up.

214 00:08:26,004 --> 00:08:27,130 OK. Ok.

215 00:08:27,130 --> 00:08:28,589 - Bisou à papa. - Oui. - Kiss dad for me. - Yes.

216 00:08:28,589 --> 00:08:30,800 - Je t'aime. Bye! - Moi aussi, je t'aime. - I love you, bye ! -Me too, I love you !

217 00:08:30,800 --> 00:08:33,177 - Moi, je passerai pas mon temps à faire vos messages. I wouldn't spend my time being the messenger.

218 00:08:33,177 --> 00:08:35,304 - Bien non, promis.là, Isa, écoute ça, OK? No, I promise. Isa, listen, ok?

219 00:08:35,304 --> 00:08:37,015 T'as pas eu ta promotion You didn't get your promotion

220 00:08:37,015 --> 00:08:38,808 parce qu'ils veulent remettre map, because they want to give you your chance,

221 00:08:38,808 --> 00:08:40,893 mais ils font pas confiance ? right? But they are not very confident, alright?

222 00:08:40,893 --> 00:08:42,395 En passant, ils exagèrent. And they're overreacting.

223 00:08:42,395 --> 00:08:44,147 32 ans, ça commence à être vieux. Tu sais, veut dire. 32 years old, it's quite old already. So, you know,

224 00:08:44,147 --> 00:08:46,816 là, il faut juste qu'on trouve un moyen de tasser l'autre. We just need to find how to deal with the other.

225 00:08:46,816 --> 00:08:48,651 Parce que si elle se plante, c'est sûr qu'ils vont Because, if she messes up, they will certainly

226 00:08:48,651 --> 00:08:50,445 te donner son poste, voyons! Ils sont pas caves! Give you your job, they're not stupid.

227 00:08:50,445 --> 00:08:51,654 Je veux dire, oui, I mean, yes,

228 00:08:51,654 --> 00:08:53,039 ils sont caves, mais ils sont pas caves! They're stupid, but they're not stupid!

229 00:08:53,039 --> 00:08:54,032 Tu comprends ce que je veux dire You understand what I mean

230 00:08:54,032 --> 00:08:55,275 quand je dis qu'ils sont pas caves! When I say they're not stupid

231 00:08:55,275 --> 00:08:57,961 là, checke-moi bien t'aider, ma fille, t'en reviendras pas! Let me help you, girl, you won't believe it !

232 00:08:57,961 --> 00:09:00,371 J'ai genre deux, trois idées qu'il faut que je mette en ordre I have, like, a couple of ideas that I need to organize

233 00:09:00,371 --> 00:09:01,998 dans ma tête et que je me calme un peu. In my head, and I need to calm down.

234 00:09:01,998 --> 00:09:03,917 Et toi et moi, team! And you and me, team !

235 00:09:03,917 --> 00:09:05,118 Tu vas capoter, t'en reviendras même pas! You're gonna rock, you won't believe it !

236 00:09:05,118 --> 00:09:07,253 Ça va être malade! It's going to be awesome !

237 00:09:08,897 --> 00:09:10,840 - As-tu dormi? Did you sleep?

238 00:09:10,882 --> 00:09:13,518 Anaïs, as-tu pris de la coke? Anaïs, did you take cocaine?

239 00:09:17,072 --> 00:09:21,017 - Qu'est-ce que tu as le goût de manger pour souper? What do you want to eat for dinner?

240 00:09:21,059 --> 00:09:25,021 - On peut parler d'autres choses que de bouffe, s'il vous plaît? Can we talk about something else than food, please?

241 00:09:25,063 --> 00:09:27,231 - Bien oui. De quoi veux-tu qu'on parle? Yes. What do you want to talk about?

242 00:09:27,273 --> 00:09:29,150 D'Isabelle? Vas-y, je t'écoute. Of Isabelle? Go ahead, I'm listening?

243 00:09:29,192 --> 00:09:30,359 (soupir) (sigh)

244 00:09:30,401 --> 00:09:32,153 - Bon! Tu es de mauvaise foi, là. Well, you're being dishonest here.

245 00:09:32,195 --> 00:09:34,030 - Je le sais que tu regrettes de l'avoir laissée. I know you regret you have let her.

246 00:09:34,072 --> 00:09:36,365 Et tu es fourré, parce qu'elle ne veut plus rien savoir de toi. And now you're fooled, because she doesn't want to hear anything from you anyways.

247 00:09:36,365 --> 00:09:37,825 - Non, ça n'a rien à voir. No, that's not it.

248 00:09:37,867 --> 00:09:39,869 - Hé! Tu es convaincant, c'est effrayant. Ha ! You're so convincing, it's frightening.

249 00:09:39,869 --> 00:09:41,788 - OK, je le sais pas, Sophie! Peut-être. Ok, I don't know, Sophie, maybe !

250 00:09:41,829 --> 00:09:43,664 Ça te va, ça? Peut-être! Okay? Maybe !

251 00:09:43,664 --> 00:09:45,583 Je suis fourré! Veux-tu me donner un break? I'm fooled. Can you give me a break?

252 00:09:45,583 --> 00:09:47,794 Fais juste me donner un criss de break! Just give me a f*cking break.

254 00:10:06,604 --> 00:10:20,785 (♪♪♪)

255 00:10:20,785 --> 00:10:22,203 - Excuse-moi. Excuse me.

256 00:10:23,454 --> 00:10:26,040 Pourrais-tu mettre quelque chose d'un peu plus... Could you wear something more...

257 00:10:27,708 --> 00:10:29,669 - Oh, je suis toute mêlée! Oh, I'm so sick!

258 00:10:29,710 --> 00:10:32,380 Je ressens comme un grand vide intérieur. I feel empty inside.

259 00:10:32,380 --> 00:10:33,406 Tu comprends? Do you understand?

260 00:10:33,406 --> 00:10:35,133 - C'est bon, tu peux y aller. Alright, you can go.

261 00:10:35,133 --> 00:10:36,560 - Ah, mon amour! Je pense qu'il faut que je lâche ma job. Ah, my love, I think I need to quit my job.

262 00:10:36,560 --> 00:10:38,820 - Ça tombe bien, je suis tellement dans le jus, Great, everything's great right now

263 00:10:38,820 --> 00:10:40,830 je t'engage maintenant. - Oui So I'm hiring you. - Yes

264 00:10:40,830 --> 00:10:42,732 On s'en reparle tantôt, c'est bon? We'll talk about it later, alright?

265 00:10:42,732 --> 00:10:43,851 Je t'aime! - Moi aussi, I love you ! I love you ! - Me too, I love you !

267 00:10:44,892 --> 00:10:46,435 - Qu'est-ce que tu fais? C'est les desserts. What are you doing? These are the desserts.

268 00:10:46,477 --> 00:10:48,196 Ramène ça en arrière, s'il te plaît. Take this back, please?

269 00:10:48,938 --> 00:10:50,606 - C'était un écureuil! It was a squirrel !

270 00:10:50,606 --> 00:10:52,441 (rires) (laughs)

271 00:10:52,483 --> 00:10:55,319 Qui dans la vie mélange un chien et un écureuilà Who confuses a dog with a squirrelà

272 00:10:57,238 --> 00:10:58,197 (rires) (laughs)

273 00:10:58,239 --> 00:10:59,991 Ça arrive pas! It just doesn't happen !

274 00:11:00,032 --> 00:11:01,993 - Puis, c'est correct? Are we good?

275 00:11:02,034 --> 00:11:03,286 - Oui, ça va. Amuse-toi! Yes, it's alright, have fun !

276 00:11:03,327 --> 00:11:04,662 - Oui, oui. Courage! Alright? Yes, yes. Keep going. Alright?

277 00:11:04,704 --> 00:11:06,831 - Es-tu sûre d'avoir invité tout le monde? Are you sure you invited everyone?

278 00:11:06,873 --> 00:11:08,624 On dirait qu'il manque d'atmosphère. It seems like there's no ambience.

279 00:11:08,666 --> 00:11:10,501 - Bien oui, j'ai invité tout le monde. Yes, I invited everyone.

280 00:11:10,543 --> 00:11:11,836 - Oh! Non, merci. Oh ! No, thank you.

281 00:11:11,878 --> 00:11:13,588 On gagnera pas de prix pour les bouchées. We won't win any award for the canapes.

282 00:11:13,629 --> 00:11:15,089 Ça aurait pris des petites verrines, We would have needed some verrines,

283 00:11:15,131 --> 00:11:16,257 quelque chose de... something...

284 00:11:16,299 --> 00:11:17,842 - Vous avez coupé les budgets deux fois. You cut down the subventions twice.

285 00:11:17,884 --> 00:11:17,884 Il y a peut-être un lien. Maybe there's a link.

286 00:11:17,884 --> 00:11:19,427 - Wouhou! Wouhou !

287 00:11:19,468 --> 00:11:21,679 - C'est qui, cette actrice-là? Who is this actress?

288 00:11:21,721 --> 00:11:23,264 Elle était sur la liste? Was she on the list?

289 00:11:23,306 --> 00:11:25,057 Shooter! Shooter !

290 00:11:25,099 --> 00:11:26,309 - (en choeur): Wouh! (together) Wouh !

291 00:11:26,350 --> 00:11:28,644 - Elle, c'est l'atmosphère. She is the ambience.

292 00:11:34,066 --> 00:11:35,818 Ça va bien ici? Merci d'être venus! How is it going here? Thanks for coming !

293 00:11:37,486 --> 00:11:38,946 Oh! Merci! Oh, thank you !

294 00:11:42,074 --> 00:11:43,534 bitch? Bitch?

295 00:11:43,576 --> 00:11:45,036 - Oui. - Elle s'en vient nous parler! Yes. -She's coming !

296 00:11:45,077 --> 00:11:46,913 - Chut! Chut! Dis rien, dis rien! Shh, shh, don't say anything!

297 00:11:46,954 --> 00:11:48,623 - Elle est belle, mais elle a l'air pognée du cul. She's pretty, but she seems to be a real tight-ass.

298 00:11:48,664 --> 00:11:49,999 - Madame Champagne! Madam Champagne !

299 00:11:50,041 --> 00:11:52,335 J'aimerais ça vous présenter ma soeur Anaïs. I'd like to introduce you to my sister, Anaïs.

300 00:11:52,335 --> 00:11:54,128 - Ah oui! Je pense qu'on peut commencer Ah yes. I think we can begin

301 00:11:54,128 --> 00:11:55,796 avant qu'ils s'endorment. Before they fall asleep.

302 00:11:55,796 --> 00:11:57,089 - Ah oui? On dirait que j'attendrais You think? I think we should wait

303 00:11:57,089 --> 00:11:58,716 qu'ils finissent leur premier verre, they finish their first drink,

304 00:11:58,716 --> 00:12:00,176 qu'ils soient un peu plus cocktail, they get into the atmosphere..

305 00:12:00,176 --> 00:12:01,969 un peu plus réceptifs. Fiez-vous sur moi. Let them be more receptive. Trust me.

306 00:12:01,969 --> 00:12:03,146 J'en ai fait plein, des lancements. I've done a lot of premieres.

307 00:12:03,146 --> 00:12:04,080 - Elle en a tellement fait, She's done so many,

308 00:12:04,080 --> 00:12:06,224 elle pourrait quasiment être directrice. She almost could be the director.

309 00:12:08,142 --> 00:12:09,769 - Je sais pas comment ça marchait avant I don't know how it worked before,

310 00:12:09,810 --> 00:12:11,979 avec monsieur Simard, mais à partir de maintenant, with Mr. Simard, but for now on,

311 00:12:12,021 --> 00:12:13,856 on va faire comme je dis. OK? We will do as I say, ok?

312 00:12:13,898 --> 00:12:15,483 Merci, les filles! Thank you girls !

313 00:12:17,193 --> 00:12:18,369 - Oh! Ah, tiens... - Oh! Ah, here...

314 00:12:18,199 --> 00:12:20,112 - Elle te domine bien raide! She's being bossy.

315 00:12:20,112 --> 00:12:21,405 - Oui. Yes.

316 00:12:21,405 --> 00:12:22,115 - Hmm. - Hmm.

316 00:12:22,115 --> 00:12:23,215 Elles sont bonnes, ces bouchées-là. Those canapés are delicious.

317 00:12:23,215 --> 00:12:25,159 - Hum-hum. Hum-Hum.

318 00:12:26,561 --> 00:12:28,163 Délicieux! Delicious !

319 00:12:28,404 --> 00:12:30,122 - C'est ça que je disais. That's what I said.

320 00:12:30,164 --> 00:12:31,582 Bon, il faut que j'y aille. I need to go.

321 00:12:31,624 --> 00:12:32,667 - Bonsoir! Good evening !

322 00:12:32,708 --> 00:12:34,210 Bonsoir, tout le monde! Good evening everyone !

323 00:12:34,252 --> 00:12:35,753 Je me présente, Myriam Champagne, Let me introduce myself, Myriam Champagne

324 00:12:35,795 --> 00:12:37,380 nouvelle directrice de La Station. New director of The Station.

325 00:12:37,421 --> 00:12:40,049 (applaudissements) (applauses)

326 00:12:40,091 --> 00:12:42,093 Merci! Merci! Merci! Thank you, thank you, thank you !

327 00:12:42,134 --> 00:12:45,972 C'est un honneur pour moi d'être à la tête d'un espace culturel It's an honour for me to be the head of a cultural space

328 00:12:46,013 --> 00:12:49,850 multidisciplinaire aussi inspirant et effervescent. multidisciplinary, inspiring and effervescent

329 00:12:49,892 --> 00:12:52,144 J'espère vraiment être à la hauteur. En tout cas! I hope I'll live up to expectations.

330 00:12:52,186 --> 00:12:53,813 - Hé, toi, tu es effronté pas à peu près! Ha, you're ashamed of nothing, coming here !

331 00:12:53,854 --> 00:12:55,314 - Je vais faire mon possible. I'll do everything I can...

332 00:12:55,356 --> 00:12:56,941 - T'as pas d'affaire ici! - Je serai... You don't have anything to do here ! - I will be...

333 00:12:56,983 --> 00:12:58,484 - Isabelle ne veut plus te voir! Isabelle doesn't want to see you anymore !

334 00:12:58,484 --> 00:13:00,319 Tu es mort pour elle! Tu n'existes plus! You're dead to her ! You don't exist anymore !

335 00:13:00,319 --> 00:13:02,321 - C'est correct, on continue, tout le monde, on enchaîne. It's okay, let's carry on.

336 00:13:02,321 --> 00:13:04,407 Tout est beau. - Je serai assistée... Everything's fine. -I will be assisted by...

337 00:13:04,407 --> 00:13:06,826 - Viens donc dehors, on va se parler deux secondes. Come outside, we're gonna talk two seconds.

338 00:13:06,826 --> 00:13:09,537 - C'est ça, décâlisse! That's f*cking right !

339 00:13:09,578 --> 00:13:12,707 - ... qui est vraiment une assistante de haut niveau. ... who really is an great assistant.

340 00:13:12,748 --> 00:13:15,126 Et, euh... and euh...

341 00:13:17,962 --> 00:13:20,798 Mademoiselle, là, je pense qu'on t'a assez vue. Miss, I think we've seen enough of you.

342 00:13:20,798 --> 00:13:22,758 - Vous, slaquez-vous le Botox! J'ai pas pantoute le goût You, you can put your Botox where I think ! I really don't want to

343 00:13:22,758 --> 00:13:24,635 de respirer le même air que vous! Breathe the same air as you!

344 00:13:27,555 --> 00:13:29,098 - Je m'en occupe. I'll take care of it.

345 00:13:29,140 --> 00:13:31,434 - La musique, il faut que je la mette moi-même? Must I play the music myself?

346 00:13:31,475 --> 00:13:32,977 - C'est beau, j'y vais! It's ok, I'll do it!

347 00:13:35,604 --> 00:13:37,690 - Désolée! Sorry !

348 00:13:37,690 --> 00:13:41,819 Alors, non, non, ne vous en faites pas, restez joyeux! Don't worry, continue to enjoy !

349 00:13:41,819 --> 00:13:44,488 Ce sont les joies du direct, on pourrait dire! These are the risks of the direction !

350 00:13:44,488 --> 00:13:47,074 Alors, il y a du vin et des bouchées. There's wine, and canapés...

351 00:13:47,074 --> 00:13:49,035 Et vous verrez les affiches magnifiques And the posters are wonderful

352 00:13:49,035 --> 00:13:50,745 qui ont été créées which have been created

353 00:13:50,745 --> 00:13:52,748 pour...(soupir) for...(sigh)

354 00:13:54,290 --> 00:13:56,334 - Tu sais pas de quoi il est capable, ce gars-l��. You don't know what he can do, this guy.

355 00:13:56,375 --> 00:13:58,094 - Arrête! Il est juste allé voir son ex Stop it ! He just came to see his ex

356 00:13:58,094 --> 00:13:59,212 comme un osti de moron. Like a stupid asshole.

357 00:13:59,212 --> 00:14:00,939 On a tous déjà fait ça une fois dans notre vie. We've all done that before.

358 00:14:01,080 --> 00:14:02,798 - Non, tu comprends pas, il est dangereux! You don't understand, he's dangerous !

359 00:14:02,840 --> 00:14:04,800 Il veut ruiner sa vie! He wants to ruin her life!

360 00:14:04,800 --> 00:14:07,803 Et Isa est trop naive, mais moi, je le vois venir en criss! Isa is too naive, but I can see it coming !

361 00:14:07,803 --> 00:14:08,980 - Hé! Ha !

361 00:14:08,980 --> 00:14:09,780 - (soupir) (sigh)

362 00:14:09,880 --> 00:14:12,350 On va pas laisser ça gâcher notre soirée. Let's not ruin our night with this.

363 00:14:13,950 --> 00:14:15,394 Hein? Hmm?

364 00:14:15,436 --> 00:14:16,771 - Hum-hum. Hm-hum.

365 00:14:23,944 --> 00:14:25,279 - Ah! Ah !

366 00:14:26,280 --> 00:14:27,656 Isabelle? Isabelle?

367 00:14:27,698 --> 00:14:30,076 Je sais que tu as une vie bien, bien excitante, I know you have a very very interesting life,

368 00:14:30,117 --> 00:14:32,536 mais tes histoires personnelles, ça reste en dehors d'ici. But your personal stories stay out of here.

369 00:14:32,578 --> 00:14:33,746 Est-ce qu'on se comprend? Do you understand?

370 00:14:33,788 --> 00:14:35,706 - Anaïs est pas comme ça d'habitude. Anaïs isn't like this, usually.

371 00:14:35,748 --> 00:14:37,041 C'est parce que mon ex est débarqué. It's because my ex came so...

372 00:14:37,083 --> 00:14:38,959 - Ca, ça m'intéresse pas vraiment. I don't really care.

373 00:14:39,001 --> 00:14:41,962 Je veux pas être obligée de te ramener à l'ordre sans arrêt. I don't want to have to play the police all the time.

374 00:14:42,004 --> 00:14:44,673 Je trouve ça complètement contre-productif. OK? I think it's completely counter-productive. OK?

375 00:14:44,715 --> 00:14:46,342 (soupir) (sigh)

376 00:14:46,384 --> 00:14:48,260 Bonne fin de soirée. Good night.

377 00:14:48,302 --> 00:14:49,553 - Bye. - Bye. Bye.

378 00:14:54,575 --> 00:14:57,269 - Elle te donne du trouble, ma belle Isabelle. She's giving you a hard time, my lovely Isabelle.

379 00:14:57,311 --> 00:14:58,854 - Mets-en! She is !

380 00:15:00,231 --> 00:15:02,274 - Veux-tu que je lui règle son compte? Do you want me to deal with her?

381 00:15:02,316 --> 00:15:04,819 - Ha! Pas besoin, Adam. Ha ! No need, Adam.

382 00:15:06,404 --> 00:15:08,155 Veux-tu dormir en dedans? Do you want to sleep inside?

383 00:15:08,197 --> 00:15:09,949 Tu as l'air fatigué, je trouve. You look tired.

384 00:15:09,990 --> 00:15:12,076 - Hum-hum. - Envoie, viens-t'en! - Hum-Hum. -Come on.

385 00:15:20,167 --> 00:15:22,503 - Viens dormir avec moi. On serait bien. Come sleep with me, we'll be good.

386 00:15:22,545 --> 00:15:23,754 - OK? ok?

387 00:15:23,796 --> 00:15:25,089 - Envoie! Come on !

388 00:15:28,217 --> 00:15:30,594 - Il y en a un game. There's another one in the game.

389 00:15:48,821 --> 00:15:51,574 - Qu'est-ce que tu fais ici, Marc-Antoine? What are you doing here, Marc-Antoine?

390 00:15:53,242 --> 00:15:54,785 - Je suis désolé. I'm sorry.

391 00:15:56,120 --> 00:15:57,913 J'ai été con. I've been stupid.

392 00:15:57,955 --> 00:16:00,791 - Tu parles de ce soir ou à l'Halloween? Are you talking about tonight or about Halloween?

393 00:16:04,270 --> 00:16:06,922 Ça dure depuis combien de temps? How long?

394 00:16:06,964 --> 00:16:09,341 - Pas longtemps. Not much.

395 00:16:09,383 --> 00:16:11,552 Un mois. Deux mois. One month, two months.

396 00:16:11,552 --> 00:16:13,137 - Deux mois! Two months !

397 00:16:13,179 --> 00:16:15,347 Quel âge? How old?

398 00:16:15,347 --> 00:16:16,700 - 24, -24,

398 00:16:16,700 --> 00:16:17,500 - (pleurer) - (cries)

399 00:16:17,500 --> 00:16:19,935 Non, mais elle fait 26-27 facile. No but she looks like 26-27,easily.

400 00:16:19,935 --> 00:16:22,271 - Avez-vous baisé dans notre lit? Did you fuck in our bed?

401 00:16:22,313 --> 00:16:24,273 - Bien non, bien non, quand même! No, no, of course not !

402 00:16:24,315 --> 00:16:25,483 - Dans l'appart? In the flat?

403 00:16:25,817 --> 00:16:28,444 - Pas dans le lit, OK? On a... Not in the bed, ok? We..

404 00:16:28,486 --> 00:16:30,070 Peut-être la laveuse, peut-être la table, Maybe on the laundry machine, maybe on the table,

405 00:16:30,112 --> 00:16:31,780 mais on n'a pas baisé dans le lit, ça, je le sais. But we didn't fuck in the bed, that I know.

406 00:16:31,822 --> 00:16:33,199 - Oh! Oh!

407 00:16:33,240 --> 00:16:34,700 Je portais une perruque, Marc-Antoine! I was wearing a wig, Marc-Antoine.

408 00:16:34,742 --> 00:16:37,161 C'est comme une loi non écrite: on fait pas de la peine It's like a written law : you don't cause pain

409 00:16:37,161 --> 00:16:38,746 à quelqu'un qui porte une perruque. To someone wearing a wig !

410 00:16:38,787 --> 00:16:40,456 - Je le sais. Je suis désolé. I know, I'm sorry.

411 00:16:40,498 --> 00:16:42,208 Pour ce soir aussi. For tonight as well.

412 00:16:43,667 --> 00:16:46,003 Je pouvais pas rentrer chez nous. I couldn't go home.

413 00:16:46,403 --> 00:16:49,048 J'avais besoin de te voir. I needed to see you.

414 00:16:51,175 --> 00:16:53,802 - Bien moi, ça me tente pas de te voir. Well I don't want to see you.

415 00:16:56,039 --> 00:16:58,807 (rire) (laugh)

416 00:16:58,849 --> 00:17:01,018 Ma soeur non plus, on dirait! And my sister either, I think !

416 00:17:01,018 --> 00:17:02,853 (rire) (laugh)

417 00:17:02,853 --> 00:17:05,272 - Je peux dormir chez vous ce soir? Can I sleep at your place tonight?

418 00:17:07,583 --> 00:17:09,818 Juste ce soir. Just tonight?

419 00:17:09,860 --> 00:17:11,779 - Tu me niaises? Are you kidding me?

420 00:17:13,072 --> 00:17:15,157 - Tu étais parfaite de même, hein? You were perfect, you know?

421 00:17:15,199 --> 00:17:17,409 Pas besoin de les replacer, tes cheveux, no need to do anything to your hair

422 00:17:17,451 --> 00:17:18,994 anyway. Anyways.

423 00:17:19,036 --> 00:17:20,329 Hein? What?

424 00:17:20,371 --> 00:17:23,249 (bruit de la chasse d'eau) (flushing)

425 00:17:24,833 --> 00:17:27,169 (fracas) (blast)

426 00:17:27,211 --> 00:17:28,712 Ça va? Are you alright?

427 00:17:28,754 --> 00:17:30,381 - Elles sont ou, mes affaires, criss? Where is my stuff, fuck!

428 00:17:30,422 --> 00:17:32,341 Je me suis fait voler mes affaires! Someone stole my stuff !

429 00:17:32,383 --> 00:17:34,677 Regarde, c'est pas à moi, ça! Look, that's not mine !

430 00:17:34,718 --> 00:17:36,262 Il y a quelqu'un qui est venu dans l'appart! Someone came here !

431 00:17:36,303 --> 00:17:37,805 Ferme la porte, il est peut-être encore là! Close the door, maybe they're still here !

432 00:17:37,846 --> 00:17:39,223 - Je pense qu'on est seuls, c'est beau. I think we're alone, it's ok.

433 00:17:39,265 --> 00:17:40,641 - Il est peut-être dans la chambre à Isa! Maybe they're in Isa's bedroom !

434 00:17:40,641 --> 00:17:42,184 Elle est ou, Isa? Where is Isa?

435 00:17:42,226 --> 00:17:44,019 - Anaïs, tu es chez moi, là. As-tu bu tant que ça? Anaïs, you're at my place. How much have you had to drink?

436 00:17:44,019 --> 00:17:45,771 - Isa est en danger! Il y a quelqu'un dans l'appart! Isa is in danger! There's someone here!

437 00:17:45,813 --> 00:17:46,855 - OK! Ok !

438 00:17:46,897 --> 00:17:48,524 Je vais aller voir, OK? I'm going to check, alright?

439 00:17:48,566 --> 00:17:50,067 Reste là. Stay here.

440 00:17:50,109 --> 00:17:51,360 Je vais aller voir. I'm going to check.

441 00:17:52,736 --> 00:17:54,071 Bouge pas, je reviens. Don't move, I'll be back.

442 00:17:56,031 --> 00:17:58,784 OK! OK! Ok, ok !

443 00:18:00,494 --> 00:18:03,872 (sons indistincts) (indistinct noise)

444 00:18:03,914 --> 00:18:05,499 - Non, mais c'est un peu absurde. No, it's a little absurd.

445 00:18:05,541 --> 00:18:07,459 Ça devrait être moi qui dors sur le divan, non? I should be sleeping on the couch, shouldn't I?

446 00:18:09,211 --> 00:18:11,755 - Moi, si j'étais toi, je resterais dans la chambre If I were you, I'd stay in the room.

447 00:18:11,797 --> 00:18:13,799 parce que Anaïs peut arriver n'importe quand. Anaïs can arrive at any time.

448 00:18:13,841 --> 00:18:15,676 - Ah. Ah.

449 00:18:15,718 --> 00:18:18,512 Ah, c'est bon, ce film-là! Je l'ai déjà vu, ça. Ah, I like this movie ! I've seen it.

450 00:18:32,235 --> 00:18:34,070 Je pense à ça, c'est pas dans ce film-là Isn't it in this movie that

451 00:18:34,070 --> 00:18:38,365 que le gars et la fille recouchent ensemble the guy and the girl sleep together again

452 00:18:38,407 --> 00:18:40,826 même si le gars... right? Even if the guy... right?

453 00:18:41,827 --> 00:18:43,162 Quoi? What?

454 00:18:43,203 --> 00:18:45,497 - Le gars a sauvé la vie de la fille The guy saved the girl

455 00:18:45,539 --> 00:18:46,957 et celle de son frère trisomique. And her disabled brother.

456 00:18:46,999 --> 00:18:48,667 Entre toi et moi, tu es loin d'accoter ça. Well, between you and me, you've done nothing like that.

457 00:18:50,919 --> 00:18:52,838 - Bien non, mais c'est un film! No, but it's a movie !

458 00:18:52,880 --> 00:18:54,923 C'est une analogie, tout est plus gros, là. It's an anlogy ! Everything's bigger here.

459 00:18:54,965 --> 00:18:58,218 Et entre toi et moi... And between you and me,

460 00:18:58,260 --> 00:19:00,679 c'est quoi les chances qu'un gars... what are the odds that a guy

461 00:19:00,721 --> 00:19:03,474 sauve deux vies différentes en dedans de deux heures? Saves two lives in two hours?

462 00:19:03,515 --> 00:19:04,933 - Marc-Antoine, va te coucher. Marc-Antoine, go to sleep.

463 00:19:04,933 --> 00:19:06,143 - OK. Ok.

464 00:19:08,012 --> 00:19:09,647 Non, attends un peu. No, wait.

465 00:19:09,688 --> 00:19:12,191 Il faut que je te dise quelque chose avant. I need to tell you something before.

466 00:19:13,776 --> 00:19:16,362 De toutes les filles avec qui j'ai couché dans ma vie, Of all the girls I've slept with,

467 00:19:16,403 --> 00:19:18,489 c'est toi, la meilleure au lit. You're the best in bed.

468 00:19:18,489 --> 00:19:21,926 - Ha! Je suis supposée faire quoi Ha ! What am I supposed to do

469 00:19:21,926 --> 00:19:23,527 avec cette information-là, moi? with this information?

470 00:19:23,527 --> 00:19:24,829 - Je sais pas, je me suis dit que c'était important I don't know, I thought it was important

471 00:19:24,829 --> 00:19:27,998 que tu le saches. Tu es douce, OK? That you know it. You're sweet ok?

472 00:19:27,998 --> 00:19:29,998 Tu as de l'imagination, You have imagination,

472 00:19:30,198 --> 00:19:31,001 des fois t'es cochonne... and a dirty mind...

473 00:19:31,043 --> 00:19:32,753 - OK, regarde, c'est bon! Ok, alright, stop it !

474 00:19:32,795 --> 00:19:34,463 C'est bon, arrête, OK? Stop it, ok?

475 00:19:34,505 --> 00:19:35,839 - Je m'excuse. I'm sorry.

476 00:19:38,175 --> 00:19:39,635 - Même la Suédoise était pas-- Even the Swedish girl, it wasn't...

477 00:19:39,677 --> 00:19:41,720 - Ah! Tu vois, je savais que ça te ferait plaisir. Ah ! See, I knew you'd like it !

478 00:19:41,762 --> 00:19:43,514 - Non, non, c'est juste que... No, no, it's just that...

479 00:19:51,772 --> 00:19:53,399 (Anaïs:)- Hé, laisse-moi sortir! Eh, let me out !

480 00:19:53,440 --> 00:19:55,818 (Romain:)- OK, Anaïs, je ne la trouve plus drôle! OK, Anaïs, it's not funny anymore !

481 00:19:55,818 --> 00:19:57,319 - Arrête de tenir la porte! Stop holding the door !

482 00:19:57,361 --> 00:20:00,531 - OK, OK, on se calme, on se calme, on se calme! OK, ok, keep calm !

483 00:20:02,566 --> 00:20:04,243 Chut! Chut! Chut! Shh, Shh, Shh !

484 00:20:04,284 --> 00:20:14,020 (vibration de cellulaire) (haleter) (vibration) (gasp)

485 00:20:14,420 --> 00:20:15,879 (fracas de vitre) (glass blast)

486 00:20:15,979 --> 00:20:18,674 (sniffler) - Oups! (hiss) Oops!

487 00:20:18,716 --> 00:20:20,008 shit! Shit !

488 00:20:20,050 --> 00:20:22,219 - Je me suis coupée! (sniffler) I cut myself ! (hiss)

489 00:20:25,014 --> 00:20:27,450 (sniffler) Moi, là... (hiss) Well I...

490 00:20:27,650 --> 00:20:29,685 j'aurais le goût d'une grosse crème molle. I'd like an ice cream.

491 00:20:29,727 --> 00:20:30,894 - Hein-hein. Yeah, yeah

492 00:20:30,936 --> 00:20:32,229 - Toi? You?

493 00:20:32,229 --> 00:20:33,647 - Oui! Oui! Oui! Yes, Yes, Yes !

494 00:20:33,647 --> 00:20:34,773 Moi aussi. Me too.

495 00:20:35,899 --> 00:20:37,151 - OK! OK !

496 00:20:37,192 --> 00:20:38,402 - Oui. Yes.

497 00:20:39,611 --> 00:20:40,863 - On y va? Let's go?

498 00:20:40,904 --> 00:20:42,406 - Oui. - OK! Yes. - OK !

499 00:20:42,448 --> 00:20:44,241 - Oui.(sonnerie) (ringing)

500 00:20:46,577 --> 00:20:47,895 9-1-1,

500 00:20:47,895 --> 00:20:48,795 (soupir) (sigh)

501 00:20:52,058 --> 00:20:55,335 - Est-ce que vous dormez bien ces temps-ci? Do you sleep well lately?

502 00:20:55,377 --> 00:20:58,005 Avez-vous une libido plus forte que d'habitude? Do you have a stonger libido than usualà

503 00:20:58,046 --> 00:20:59,923 - Plus forte que la vôtre, oui, ça se pourrait. Stronger than yours, yeah, probably.

504 00:20:59,965 --> 00:21:01,341 Ha! ha! ha! Ha! ha ! Ha !

505 00:21:01,383 --> 00:21:02,551 Ecoutez, docteur, Listen, Doctor,

506 00:21:02,593 --> 00:21:04,887 c'est que...ça fait super longtemps It's just, it's been a while

507 00:21:04,928 --> 00:21:06,680 que je me suis pas sentie bien comme ça. Since I've been that happy.

508 00:21:06,722 --> 00:21:09,475 Je suis en train de reprendre le contrôle sur ma vie. I'm taking control over my life.

509 00:21:09,516 --> 00:21:11,185 de fun! I'm having fun !

510 00:21:11,226 --> 00:21:13,187 C'est rendu que le bonheur, c'est une maladie, Is happiness a disease?

511 00:21:13,228 --> 00:21:14,313 criss, c'est ça? Fuck, is that it?

00:20:52,058 --> 00:21:54,900 {\pos(15,120)}EBro pups DECIPHER GANG Subs CE FR-EN Charlie proof reading orphantrash Sync AN

#TropEnSubs #Evelyne Brochu #ebro subs #trop en subs

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underabr0kensky · 7 years

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About Me Tag

I got tagged by am-i-evil. Thanks for that! <3

Rules: Answer the questions and tag 20 blogs you’d like to know better.

Star Sign: LIbra

Height: 6′

Time right now: 1:01 PM. Or 13:01 since I know several people who follow me use 24 hour time and I’m still kinda trying to get used to it.

Last thing googled: Something about Dead Island, one of the quests was pissing me off.

Favorite music artist(s): Children of Bodom, Metallica, the Beatles, Wretched, As I Lay Dying, DragonForce, Lit, blink-182, Lamb of God, Nightwish, Orden Ogan, Sum 41, Two Steps from Hell

Last tv show watched: Dragon Ball Super.

What am I wearing right now: A Nightmare Before Christmas pajama pants and a solid black T-shirt.

When did I create my blog: 2012 I think.

What kind of stuff do I post: Sad/romance quotes, sex stuff, music/guitar/metal things, horror movies photosets/gifs, scenery gifs, Kingdom Hearts, DB/DBZ, Emma Watson, and anything I find interesting/weird/abstract/cute.

Do I have any other blogs: Nope.

Do I get asks regularly: Fucking never.

Why did I choose my url: I love Kingdom Hearts and I play guitar.

Gender: Male.

Pokémon team: I don’t remember the individual Pokemans, but I had a team that could counter every type in the game. So that one.

Favorite color: Black.

Average hours of sleep: 8-10 hours.

Lucky number: I don’t have one. Maybe 13.

Favorite characters: I’ll just list a few: Vegeta, Greg House, Rand al’Thor, Sinon, Arcueid Brunestud, and Kenzi popped into my head first

How many blankets I sleep with: 1, sometimes 2 depending on how cold it is.

Dream job(s): Musician, published author, or a pilot.

I’m tagging @the-texas-chainsaw-mascara @beyondthedarksun @diamondxuniverse @depressingmadness @sunlitem @am-i-evil @accio-shitpost @reckless-fires

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daddys-little-princess-wor-blog1 · 4 years

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Examiner ce rapport sur la meuble jardin

Nos assortiment a legard de meubles saccordent parfaitement a pour espace en tenant vie, contre meubler facilement toutes les pieces en meme temps que la habitation : Meuble de chambre en compagnie de Formation apres matelas marche cher, Meuble en tenant cusine malgre rare interstice davantage pratique, Meuble en tenant Chambre de bain aupres ce gain en meme temps que esplanade, Mobilier en compagnie de bureau astucieux aupres bizarre espace de tache agreable, ensuite pareillement avec nombreuses promotions sur les Lampes apres Meubles enfant ! Ensuite toi-meme chers acquereur nonobstant quoi craquerez-vous-meme ? !Contre etre surs en meme temps que oui choisir, consultez cela mentor Meubles don.Titi 24 avril 2019 Moiai bravissimo pris qui Moi-meme negatif peux foulee joindre Cdiscount en ce Prestation. Ego ne suis marche cliente alors Nous-memeai une Devinette a a elles fonder.Worst payments of all marketplaces. 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I've never used the channel cognition purchasing, I can't as I am unable to register as a customer as an English consumer, fin I have always received a response from cDiscount helpdesk whenever an email has been sent. Fin the native with both the cDiscount helpdesk and actually answering customer queries from your own Termes conseilles is the language barrier. Anyone who vraiment ever tried translating French on Google Translate will know exactly what I mean. Translating from English to French is jolie.If CDiscount send my money back delicat I then contradiction to pay they could end up with nothing so why not just accept the 329.00 euros? As debt album agencies work nous a no spicilege, no payment basis, they aren't going to have to pay them anything experience withdrawing the debt.Utilite d'seul ordinateur, d'bizarre telephone specialiste ou Aussi d'un imprimante : Celui-ci chez a rempli celui qu'Celui-ci faut a votre Plan et au meilleur montant sur Cdiscount Specialiste. Si toi cherchez un code nomination Cdiscount electromenager, smartphone, unique code promotion Cdiscount livraison gratuite, Soin ou bien Aussi unique code promotion Cdiscount mobile, toi-meme etes au bon endroit ! Retrouvez Complets A nous bons diagramme alors Chiffre nomination Cdiscount valides Parmi 2018 sur cette Ecrit.Personnaliteai passe commande Chez Segment dans mien panier Moi-memedetiens enjambee mal avec choses mais pres outrepasser au paiement au rang du formulaire vrais recente sur mien Habilete ca donne Selon ecarlate pourquoi ?Also, CDiscount does not advert nous-memes Google. If a customer wants a product, he or she imperatif apparence nous the merchant's website.Cette eduque majorite certains codes alors Ouverture disponibles sont valides malgre tous les utilisateurs en tenant Cdiscount: lequel celui-ci decadence ces veteran ou les nouveaux client.What usually happens is, you get your collection agents to attouchement the debtor and say 'pay up pepite else' fin if they call your intimidation and negative, there isn't much else you can realistically ut.I know the Armoire's function is to keep special gear: from seasonal events, achievements, the 2.0 Artifact Armor...This information is now to ask embout annee augmentation of the Armoire, so we can keep there another special gear:LTromperie : choisissez dacheter vos cartouches dsepia chez pack, toi ferez Autant davantage deconomies egalement par exemple cela emballage T1295 Epson, cela emballage 364 HP, ceci pack PGI550, CLI551 Piece ou Pareillement cela pack LC1280 Brother.Nous toi-meme avertirons chez email des lequel'seul nouvelle message sera disponible sur nos profession partenaires: eBay, Amazon, CatawikiThe armoire desk is often called a 'computer armoire desk', pepite a computer desk, since it is used in our times to house a computer and its peripherals. 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Bon produit que vous-meme rien pouvez vrRechercher Affiner votre examen armoire metallique metallique armoire metallique ikea armoire metallique industriel armoire metallique pourpre ikea ps armoire metallique armoire metallique Ecritoire armoire metallique vestiaire armoire rangement metallique serrure armoire metallique armoire metallique industrielle armoire metallique ikea ecarlate armoire metallique cellule armoire metallique loft rideau metallique rideau metallique Fin Chatoyante alors rapide malgre se veiller unique cartouche Associable avec seul imprimante hp photosmart a626 qui n'levant davantage dans cela negoce !This kind of armoire desk is a debout gamin of the antique rolltop desk which was common in corporate or government fonction three pepite four generations ago, since it provides a fast and energique way to rideau pepite hide current work.Troc it that the Mog Suspension don't sell the gear directly, plaisant a coupon cognition that gear. 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jordanhawker · 5 years

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ember-sinon-qunit v4: Consolidation & Simplification

If you’re an Ember developer, it’s likely that you use QUnit to test your projects. If you also SinonJS to create spies/stubs for mocking out methods in your tests, this post is for you. As many people who’ve used Sinon discovered over the years, one of the risks of a test mocking strategy is failing to clean up after yourself. This can cause mocks to leak between tests, creating failures that are difficult to debug.

I created ember-sinon-qunit back in 2015 to give developers an easy way to create and cleanup mocks by injecting Sinon’s “sandbox” concept into the QUnit test() method. Two years later, Steve Calvert released ember-sinon-sandbox, providing an approach to this problem that incorporated the new hooks-style testing in ember-qunit. Earlier this year, he also released ember-sinon-sinoff as a continued evolution of that pattern. Let me show you a few examples for comparison:

The old pattern used by ember-sinon-qunit (shown above) required setup for every test and confusingly replace ember-qunit’s test function with its own wrapper. ember-sinon-sandbox improved on this by replacing the test wrapper with proper QUnit hooks:

This eliminated the test wrapper entirely and adopted the now-familiar hooks testing pattern. The result felt a lot more ergonomic and less confusing for developers. The same pattern existed for ember-sinon-sinoff as well:

You may have noticed a common problematic thread in each of these approaches, however. First of all, you have to do this in every test module, which means that developers may see you using Sinon in one test, add it to the new feature they’re developing, and forget to import the extra code necessary for the “automatic” cleanup to take place. While the one-time setup introduced in Steve’s addons provided a better alternative to solve this problem, a second issue existed. By proxying Sinon functionality into the test context via this, these addons were now responsible for maintaining the full surface area of Sinon as it continued to evolve over the years. This became very apparent when several issues were filed to add fake timers and other features to ember-sinon-qunit, all of which were perfectly reasonable requests.

This spring, we decided that this problem needed a single, unified solution that maximized the developer experience and worked with any style of Ember testing. After a lot of discussion on how to solve all of these problems, I’m proud to announce the v4 release of ember-sinon-qunit! We’ve completely reworked this addon from the ground up, deprecating the old approach as well as both of the other addons in favor of what we believe to be the most developer-friendly approach. Developers will now be able to hook up our Sinon integration once (in test-helper.js) for their entire project and never have to remember cleanup again!

ember-sinon-qunit’s one-time setup is adapted from the “Global” approaches Steve introduced in his addons, so those users may find this pattern familiar. However, once you’ve done this, any test can use the imported sinon object directly without relying on anything being injected into the test context! Take a look:

Once you’ve executed the setupSinon method, you never have to think about cleanup again! No matter how many test modules you add to the project, developers won’t have to worry about accidentally forgetting to clean up their spies and other mocks. The tests themselves become a lot cleaner as a result.

By eliminating the injected Sinon methods (or sandbox object), we’ve altogether removed the need to maintain a proxy for that library’s API. Developers are now free to use Sinon the way they would in any non-Ember project; by simply importing the sinon object into their tests and using any feature they need! You can see all of the above examples together in this gist.

Whether you’re an existing user of ember-sinon-qunit, ember-sinon-sandbox, ember-sinon-sinoff, or have simply been using Sinon by itself, we’ve got a migration path ready for you. Check out our new and improved README to learn how you can adopt this new pattern today. While the old patterns in ember-sinon-qunit were deprecated, they are still supported for backwards compatibility until the next major version, allowing you to adopt our new approach today while removing the old test wrappers over time. We also have an open issue to create a codemod for vanilla Sinon users trying to migrate from the old createSandbox method.

Developers shouldn’t have to think about whether they’re accidentally introducing state leakage between tests; the tools should just protect them by default. Steve and I hope you find this new approach easier to use than ever, so go check out the brand new ember-sinon-qunit today!

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joshhhhhhhhhhhhhhh · 6 years

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uhhhhhhhhhhhhh Asuna birthday

We all know this girl. This is Asuna Yuuki from Sword Art Online. And today is her birthday! Since SAO takes place in the future when Asuna’s an adult or whatever, my image choice is perfectly cool, but it should be noted that today is actually only her 11th birthday, and if you lewd 11 year old Asuna, well, that’s not cool.Anyway, in celebration of such a special occasion, I wanted to talk a bit about Asuna and say some things I maybe do and/or don’t like/dislike about or. This is a super spontaneous post so it probably won’t be well written or anything but eh whatever.

Asuna’s fun in the Aincrad Arc. She’s got a bit more goin’ on than Kirito at the very least. She’s a total awesome gamer girl badass but is happy to engage in her more feminine side with cooking and wearing sexy underwear and whatnot. Remember the scene where she was assigned a knight or whatever to follow her around and take care of her and whatever even though she’s beyond capable of doing just fine by herself? And when she tries to escape she’s accidentally groped by Kirito because who doesn’t love that trope? And the guy following her turns out to be a murderer anyway? Asuna’s totes ready to kill the bastard but doesn’t for some reason. Except in the original web novel where she does. Don’t know why Kawahara changed it.

I haven’t read Progressive but apparently it follows Kirito and Asuna way more closely than the anime does, where Asuna gets shafted for no reason. So maybe Asuna’s really good in Progressive idk.

TL;DR for up to this point – Asuna’s pretty cool or whatever and she’s definitely the best written character so far, getting a bit of development in the form of having a strict “let’s get out of this game ASAP” mentality that turns into a “hey maybe I still deserve to enjoy myself and have fun because after all it’s a video game” mentality. Alas that would be too good, so Kawahara drags her down by turning her into a generic anime girl. Also remember the time she overcame paralysis inflicted with console commands because of ai yo. Shit was wack.

Then we get the Fairy Dance arc where Asuna is locked in a bird cage and nearly raped by both the main antagonist and two tentacle monsters. The only thing she does is those things + throws a keycard off of a tree for Kirito which she needed to be nearly raped for anyway. Would’ve been better if they did something that didn’t involve that but I’m not a writer so what do I know? Asuna’s shite in this arc.

Asuna may as well not even be in Phantom Bullet tbh. Sinon comes in and despite quite a fair few Kawahara moments she becomes probably the best written character up to that point, but that’s a post for another day.

There’s a filler arc?

Next, we get to what I believe to genuinely be the crowning achievement of Kawahara’s writing career – the Mother’s Rosario arc. Asuna gets upgraded from deuteragonist to protagonist in this bitch. And this is also where all of her actually good development happens. We’re introduced to Asuna’s family, by which I mean her very strict and controlling mother who wants Asuna to stop playing vidya gaems and having friends and going to school A when she could be studying and getting into arranged marriages and going to school B. This pisses Asuna off because she loves having vidya A and going to gaems and playing school. She vents her frustrations by meeting a girl with AIDS and helping her last moments in life have meaning all in a video game, and then she brings mama into the game and tells her “hey yo shit dawg life in the game has value” and mama’s like “yoooooooooooooooo you right I’m sorry fam”. Order of events might be a bit jumbled there but you get the point. This is good development for Asuna and while one could argue her highs in this arc weren’t as high as Sinon’s, she was never quite as bad as Sinon could sometimes be. In other words, she wasn’t victim to Kawaharaisms. Apparently Mother’s Rosario was something of an apology from him about Fairy Dance being shite? Don’t quote me on that though.

Asuna’s in Ordinal Scale obviously but tbh all I remember about her in that movie is the image I used.

All in all, I like Asuna I think maybe. She’s definitely 2nd or 3rd best girl. Yuuki is obvs numero uno and Asuna’s competing with Sinon for that numero dos spot. That’s not bad.

Happy birthhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhday Asuna!

#30.9.18 #sao

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hviral · 5 years

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VAR controversy hides chasm between Man City and Spurs

Quel spectacle ! Des buts, du suspense, de la tension : rien n’a manqué dans ce superbe choc @ManCity / @SpursOfficial sinon un vainqueur. Le meilleur de #EPL est sur @myCANALI 🖥 I ➡️https://t.co/Y1B228R5VS#MCITOT pic.twitter.com/UWkEYBQSjC

— Canal Football Club (@CanalFootClub) 17 août 2019

“I am in love with VAR,” joked Tottenham manager Mauricio Pochettino after his side escaped with a 2-2 draw at Manchester City thanks to Gabriel Jesus’s late winner for the Premier League champions being ruled out on review.

Yet, the scoreline masked the fact that Spurs, despite reaching the Champions League final last season and breaking the club’s transfer record for French midfielder Tanguy Ndombele, still look well off potential challengers to City’s throne as champions.

Mauricio Pochettino’s men finished 27 points behind City last season, on Saturday 27 was the difference in the shot count as Tottenham mustered three to the hosts’ 30.

City will bemoan their luck and lacklustre defending that allowed Erik Lamela and Lucas Moura to cancel out goals from Raheem Sterling and Sergio Aguero with Spurs’ only two efforts on target.

However, there was no evidence in the performance of a slipping of standards after winning the first domestic treble of trophies English football had ever seen last season.

“When the people say: ‘you can do better’, better than this I don’t know if it is possible,” said a proud City manager Pep Guardiola.

“We played incredible. The best game we have played in our time together, it was so good. We played good, but we could not win.

“If we continue to play in that way we won’t have regrets and that is the most important thing.”

City were pushed all the way last season by a Liverpool side who recorded the third highest points tally in English football history with 97 and yet still could not topple Guardiola’s men for the title.

The European champions have started the Premier League season with two wins to take an early two-point lead over the champions and are clearly the most likely challengers to prevent City a hat-trick of titles.

De Bruyne makes City stronger –

However, if anything Guardiola’s men look stronger last season with Kevin de Bruyne restored to full fitness, while Spanish international Rodri was slotted seamlessly into midfield.

“We have to be proud because to play at this level against a team like Tottenham is really good for the rest of the season,” said De Bruyne, who set up both City goals.

“It’s always more difficult in a big game but we almost totally dominated them.”

Hopes that Tottenham could kick on after a season in which they eliminated City in dramatic fashion to reach the club’s first ever Champions League final and moved into a new 62,000 capacity stadium to mount a title bid look fragile.

Ndombele has impressed in his first two matches, while the signings of Giovani lo Celso and Ryan Sessegnon will add greater depth and Son Heung-min is still to return from suspension.

However, Pochettino is bracing himself for the possibility Christian Eriksen or Belgian defenders Toby Alderweireld and Jan Vertonghen could yet depart before the transfer window across Europe closes on September 2.

All three have entered the final year of their contracts and could leave the club for free next summer if they are not sold in the coming weeks.

“The squad is still unsettled, we need to wait until the transfer window in Europe is closed to see which player we are going to have and of course that is never easy,” said Pochettino, who started Alderweireld and Eriksen.

VAR may have ridden to Spurs’ rescue for now, but on this evidence they face a long season ahead if they are to keep up with the relentless pace set by City and Liverpool.

The post VAR controversy hides chasm between Man City and Spurs appeared first on HviRAL.

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SWORD ART ONLINE Memory Defrag Hack Memory Diamonds – Download Hacked Games

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