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rvwchck · 3 years

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how social media breeds nihilism for the privileged.

Throughout history, beauty has served as an indicator to analyze the progression of humanity, whether it be through the first facial reconstructions in 800 BC, or the first uses of silicone in cosmetic surgery during the 60s. Nowadays, what society dictates as beautiful is found through social media, where perfection is simulated through filters and editing. But sometimes those ideals become toxic, as it can be seen in the way these filters help maintain the Eurocentric beauty standards that have been present in our society since the ancient times. For the sake of this article, the use of the word “ethnic” will represent everything that is not traditionally western and Eurocentric.

The “face of instagram”, a profile composed of unnatural traits for the user, has been propagated so much that i has become the new standard of perfection. Now, the image created by these filters—small pointy nose, long eyelashes, sharp cheekbones and full lips— help establish the beauty standards under the western eye. However its nothing more than an illusion that is deep-rooted into the belief that perfection equals western and European. It shouldn’t come as a surprise to note that these filters aim to dim ethnic features like dark skin, prominent noses and slanted eyes as they don’t follow the European rules of beauty. Likewise it becomes evident that, under the western eyes, everything inside the ethnic scope is deemed “other” and in order to achieve or discover the true standard of beauty, society would need to rid themselves from the moral implications of the words “eastern” and “western”. In other words, we only live through the bias created by the language we use to communicate, the tool by which things are deemed as such. Therefore, it can be said that reality is only as stable as the word itself, in the same way that the modern beauty standards are as true as the culture they are rooted in.

Society has led us to believe, through social media, that beauty comes from what is similar, rather than from what is unique and different. Through the beauty standards established by these filters, the concept of “culture of the masses” that Nietzsche created becomes true to every sense of the word. This massification leads, naturally, to the loss of individuality and herd conformism through the dilution of these traits that separate individuals from one another, which are deemed as imperfections. Through the loss of individuality the meaning of community changes to “clone” as its the lack of individual differences that makes the herd identical, therefore eliminating whatever progression that can come from these exchanges.

On the other hand, this Eurocentric beauty bias can be deemed as selective. As it was mentioned before, the western beauty standards pushed by social media aim to dilute any ethnic difference on the user. However trends like “fox eye”, where the user aims to slant their eyes through makeup, has been widely criticized by the media for culture appropriation as its ironically similar to the Asian feature that is otherwise criticized when it’s not displayed on a western face. Why is it society values these traits only when displayed on non-marginalized faces? Through these ideas the concept of European nihilism can be defined, where the belief of nothing perpetuates the creation of these filters that feed into the ideas of what’s “perfect” or “imperfect”. Moreover, this nihilism can be seen as a privilege, as the opportunity to participate in these trends implicitly states that there is a right and wrong interpretation of beauty at the hands of the western user. As long as these tendencies aim to create an “exotic” look on traditionally European faces while dismissing it on minorities, the idea of “ethnic” as the other will remain on today’s culture.

#writing #article #opinion #culture #minorities #poc #latino #short #short snippet #mmusings #rvwchck

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rvwchck · 3 years

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tweet at first sight

It was one tweet. Not even all 280 characters. Just the simple phrase “I feel like @jamiethebee would be down to egg a house for his fans. just saying”.

I didn’t have more than 500 followers on Twitter, and those included only people from my school. It wasn’t even a fan account, nor was it even remotely related with Jamie Lee Oliver.

So naturally, when I saw his username in my DMs, my stomach almost fell out of my ass. Keyword being almost.

I screamed, and I did it loud. Thankfully, I was alone in my apartment, because having my roommate witness my prepubescent stunt would have been enough for me to move out. Which sounds serious when it comes from a college graduate living in Southern California.

8:06 AM

@jamiethebee: pick your poison.

tap to download attachment.

He had sent me a picture from the egg section in what appeared to be Walmart. I decided it was better not to answer, considering I was late for what seemed to be the millionth job interview of the week. Nobody said life after graduation would be so hard. Especially after enduring the hell that is living in a dorm the size of a shoebox.

Looking at my appearance in the mirror confirmed that I would not, in fact, get hired today. It may have to do with the fact that between my now coffee-stained shirt and red pants along with my rusty red hair made me look like a war zone. Or a used tampon. Or both.

Clearly L’Oreal Colorista was not the best hair dye in the market.

I glanced down at my phone, partly wondering if I had any new texts from Leo—or as I liked to call him after that cheating incident, Satan—and partly to see if any other celebrities had graced my inbox. None of those scenarios had happened, and I was now 10 minutes late.

Just when I was rushing out of the door, my roommate opened the door with a slam and proceeded to face plant onto the couch.

Well, I thought, at least I’m not in med school.

***

I somehow managed to miss the train and the bus. All in a 15 minute span. Which meant I was 25 minutes late for the interview. It would be a miracle if I even got to announce my name, or hand in my resume.

My hair was completely disheveled and one of my shoes had come off in the middle of the street, meaning my pizza socks were on full display once I arrived to the building of Pyramid Publishing. The receptionist directed me to the 16th floor, where everything was white, or really pale beige.

I sat on one of the couches ,well, rested my back for half a second before I was interrupted.

“Lisa Martin? Sorry for the long wait, we had some issues with the air conditioning” A tall secretary poked her head from one of the offices in the waiting area.

I was not a true believer, but God had just done me a solid.

11:30 AM

@jamiethebee: so you discover a

dark truth about me and then you

leave me on read?

@jamiethebee: wow, RUDE.

I hid my phone in my purse, my heart beating at an alarming rate against my chest. I was still having a hard time believing the Jamie Lee Oliver had slid into my DMs and went to the produce section of the grocery store for me. The fact that he had the audacity to call me out was also making my brain go haywire trying to come up with a decent answer.

All while struggling to pay attention to the code of ethics of the company. Because yes, I had just gotten hired to be an editor for Pyramid Publishing.

“The idea Miss Martin, is for you to have a week to get to know the office and the way things work around here before you fully immerse in what is a typical schedule of an editor in Pyramid Publishing” The man, Gregory Truman, had a smooth voice and gave off an aura of authority, partly because of the way he was seated, and partly because his secretary seemed to be in awe every time he opened his mouth to speak.

I nodded along completely distracted, smiling every once in a while to show that I was happy for the opportunity I had just been given. After four years of majoring in English and getting tired of hearing that it would be impossible to find any job, I had just landed the job of my dreams. Which sounds amazing, but it really consists of earning enough to cover my part of the rent and to afford one or two nights out every once in a while.

After agreeing to come back tomorrow morning to start my briefings, I left the building and headed for the bus station. I was about to acknowledge my Twitter notifications, which seemed to be glaring at me, when my roommate called.

To any person this would come across as normal behaviour, however when you live with a med school student who lives and breathes for their career, you get used to not hearing from them for days at a time. No news, good news right?.

“What’s up buttercup?” I answered cheerfully nonetheless. Amanda tends to be overly dramatic and extremely analytic of phone and text conversations. She has flipped out on me for answering the phone with a simple ‘hey’, claiming that she thought I was mad at her and didn’t want to live with her anymore because she forgets to hang her towels. Her words, not mine.

“Yeah, yeah, no time for greetings. Listen the curry exploded all over the kitchen” I was once again, rendered speechless.

Amanda comes from an Indian family that loves to travel and above all, loves to eat. Her recipe book is overflowing and constantly getting thicker. However, her skills are not getting any better. Last week she managed to turn the butter on fire while attempting to melt it in the microwave. Who knows how she managed to do that.

“Okay so there’s no need for me to buy more oils for the diffuser, is that what you’re saying?” I would have worried if it was another person, but Amanda tends to worry a little too much over everything and I don’t want her to beat herself up anymore over this.

“No Lisa I’m serious like I don’t even know where to start cleaning and I’ve probably ruined the kitchen and we won’t be able to repare it and I just know that you’ll want to move out because of this and—“

“Okay this is what you’ll do. You’re going to go to the wine cabinet and open a bottle of rose, you know the one you like, and you’re going to calm down and then start cleaning. First the floor so you don’t keep making a bigger mess, then the counters and so on. Mandy, seriously its not the end of the world, did you at least get to have lunch?” I heard a grunt, then a sigh. Not good.

“Obviously not Lisa, I’m on call tonight apparently. I don’t even understand what they want me there for since I just worked the morning shift two days in a row and I’m not even a real doctor yet. Like what the fuck? This is abuse”

“Okay babe, see you at home!” I hung up with a smile on my face, determined to make something out of today other than cleaning curry with Amanda. So I opened Twitter.

12:21 PM

@misalartin: pity, i only shop organic.

@misalartin: excessive hormones,

you know?

Not even thirty minutes had passed when he replied.

12:43 PM

@jamiethebee: so tell me when

and where.

tap to download attachment.

It was then I realized I had not stopped internally screaming since 8 am, because it was the only way to explain how I had not fainted yet.

Jamie Lee Oliver had been my celebrity crush ever since I knew how to turn the tv on. He had started out as a child star in my favorite tv show Morgan’s Backyard, and then had gotten into more serious stuff like action movies, playing superheroes and whatnot. Once I grew out of children’s tv, I stopped following him as an actor although his Instagram and Twitter were a true gift for my feed. He was beautiful, with dark brown hair and equally dark skin that made his pearly smile stand out beyond anything else. His chocolate eyes blended perfectly well with the rest of his complexion, which made him seem really inviting in the way his eyes disappeared almost completely when he smiled, almost like he wanted everyone to have fun along with him.

Doubt started to creep in and was slowly consuming me. I knew exactly what I had tweeted, but it was exactly that, just a tweet. I never imagined he would even see it, much less acknowledge it. Besides, I didn’t know if it was the smartest idea. I mean Leo had cheated on me, and in my old apartment when I was supposed to be in one of my classes. So I got home early because I was in the mood to skip and that’s when I found him. On my bed, on top of a freshman rushing for the sorority I belonged to. Even in that moment, I was not a confrontational person and I absolutely hated violence. But he had also shattered my trust completely and disregarded our relationship.

In hopes of being more proactive and doing the right thing, I replied.

12:48 PM

@misalartin: alright, BJ’s

in Forest ave

@misalartin: say 6?

12:49 PM

@jamiethebee: it’s a date then.

***

My hair was resembling a mood stone. In weak attempts of making my hair even, it had turned a beautiful brick orange. Adding the smell that undoubtedly clung to my clothes, I was now the personification of a plate of curry.

All of that didn’t matter once I got to BJ’s and saw a tall figure leaning on one of the walls outside. He had disguised himself extremely well, with a black hat that cast a big enough shadow to hide his face. Which I was thankful for, because the clothes he was wearing would not help him blend into the crowd. With a pair of checkered pants and a teal coloured shirt which made it clear he had missed the class on “How to dress up for a spy mission™”.

Taking a deep breath to calm myself down, I forced my feet to move towards him.

“Well one of us clearly misunderstood the mission” I said jokingly when I reached him.

He looked up from his phone and I managed to keep my cool. Not because I could, but because the sun was glaring right on my face, which made it impossible for me to see practically anything. My knees almost gave away when I covered the sun with my hand. It took every ounce of willpower for me not to jump and squeal like a crazy 12 year old girl, he was really here in front of me looking all perfect and ready for a fashion show. Contrary to myself, which looked ready to sleep in a homeless shelter. My black sweatpants and hoodie clashed completely with him and you could immediately tell we were opposites when it came to the lives we had.

“Lisa, right?” Jamie’s voice was deep and almost a whisper, which made a chill run through my body like electricity. It made me want to hear him speak forever, not caring about the topic he chose.

“Yeah. Um, do you really want to do the egg thing?” I couldn’t stop the words from escaping my mouth once I saw he had not one, but two boxes of 12 eggs.

His laugh was like a song that I wanted to listen to in replay non stop until I couldn’t stand it. And then he did the unimaginable, he pouted.

“What, chickening out already?” I smiled in embarrassment and looked down at my feet to hide my blush.

“Weren’t you taught that violence is not the answer?” I questioned him and his smile only seemed to grow bigger. Which was nice, but also worrying since it meant I was losing my moral battle.

“It’s not like we’re throwing eggs at someone, right? It’s just a house. Nothing a good cleaning can’t fix” He took off his hat to ruffle his hair before leaning down to whisper in my ear “Besides, who knows what else can happen” Jamie leaned against the wall again with a smirk, knowing perfectly well the effect he was having on me.

“Alright, you had me at eggs” I smiled sheepishly and then dragged him along to the bus stop. We kept talking, asking each other questions and trying to disguise our flirting behind lame excuses to get to know each other better.

He lowered his hat even more once we got on the bus and kept his hand on the small of my back in order not to lose me in the mess of people. It felt natural, like it wasn’t the first time we met and his hand was used to touching me all the time.

“So how come you talked to me?” I asked curiously, turning my body towards him. The bus lurched into a sudden stop, which caused me to stumble forward. Jamie caught me quickly, securing both arms around my waist and crushing me against him, since he was leaning on one of the walls. Thankfully, the eggs stayed safe beside him.

“Well the offer was more tempting than the usual ‘Jamie I love you please marry me’ kind of thing” He rubbed my arms and held eye contact with me the whole time and I was in heaven.

“Naturally, who doesn’t want to egg houses instead?” I quipped with an eyebrow raised and he laughed under his breath, like he didn’t want people in on our conversation.

“If egging houses is what I have to do to spend time with a pretty girl, then I’ll choose it over marriage any day” I was not one to fall for the usual lines, yet here I was struggling to reply without him finding out that I was very close to calling the whole thing off and take him to my apartment instead.

Snapping out of my thoughts, I glanced outside and pressed the buzzer to get off. Jamie followed me walking along the sidewalk but this time, in silence. I walked these streets like I never stopped, being grateful I chose to move out of my apartment after everything that happened.

I stopped when I recognized the familiar stones that led to his porch. It felt like I was living my worse nightmare. The maroon mailbox contrasting with the blue porch but clashing with the shiny Audi parked in the outer garage.

Suddenly, it didn’t seem like the best idea. I had to leave. Best case scenario: Leo found out but didn’t press charges. Worst case scenario: Jamie and me end up in a jail cell. Neither situation seemed appealing to me. Especially since they both involved talking to him. I wasn’t the best at concealing my anger. And I had a lot to conceal.

I didn’t realize I was crying until I felt Jamie’s warm hands wiping my cheeks. He crushed me to his chest as if we’d done this a million times, and I took a deep breath to calm myself down. The tears had stopped, yet he kept running his hand through my hair and rocking us softly.

He stepped back only to lean down and open the first dozen eggs. He placed one in my hand and then looked at the Audi in front of him.

“Do you think it has an alarm system?” He voiced my question out loud.

“I really hope not” And then I threw the first egg.

***

Either Leo didn’t care about his Audi becoming an omelet, or he simply didn’t find out about it. I was over the top we were not stuck in a jail cell, and even more happy I had avoided confrontation.

We were walking in silence again, the weight of reality on our shoulders. Now that we had pelted an entire car with eggs, there was nothing left to do with each other. It was no secret that he had to go back to Los Angeles and I had a curry explosion to take care of, yet I was finding it hard to see how our paths could cross again.

“I smell curry. Can we extend our date to more than just damaging private property?” Jamie stopped to look at me properly for the millionth time and once again, my knees threatened to give away. God his eye contact was going to kill me.

I didn’t have the heart to tell him how I was the source of the smell, so I nodded and let him lead the way this time.

One thing I had found out about Jamie Lee Oliver, he was not the best with directions. We walked around the same block four times before I got tired and yanked his phone from his hands.

“Just tell me where you want to go” I sighed exasperatedly and he chuckled, holding his hands up in surrender.

“Take me to the best burger place you know” And with that, he wrapped his arm around my waist and kept walking naturally, like he hadn’t just caused my heart to perform a drum solo in my chest.

It was a long walk, especially since I was hell-bent on getting away from my exs’ neighbourhood as quickly as possible. Jamie didn’t seem to mind the distance, so I kept my mouth shut.

“So Lisa” He spoke my name like it was foreign on his mouth, yet he treated me like I was anything but “Tell me something about yourself, something you haven’t told anyone” The words he spoke made me want to cringe, yet his tone was so inviting, it was impossible to refuse.

“Well” I hesitated, there could have been a million things to say that would have made me look better or more attractive. Instead, I chose “I’m the reason you smelled curry” Jamie tried to mask his surprise as best as he could, yet it was clear this was not what he had imagined I would say.

So naturally, I continued “My roommate managed to cause a curry explosion in our kitchen and when I came home from my interview I had barely any time to get ready before I met you and I clearly didn’t think things through because if I did, then I wouldn’t have showered. Which sounds disgusting but it would’ve made the smell less apparent and my hair a little less similar to a burning building. Also I tried to dress for the occasion but actually made an effort to look presentable, but clearly I didn’t do—

His lips were what interrupted me. One second I was boring his ears off with my rambling, the next Jamie Lee Oliver was kissing me. It was like no other kiss I’d had, he towered over me but not in an awkward way and his hands seemed to touch me in the right places at the perfect time. He was rumoured to date many girls and I understood why, he felt as comfortable kissing me as he looked when he was acting on camera. Reality caught up with me and made me lose focus, so Jamie pulled me closer to him by the waist.

After what seemed like ages, he pressed his forehead against mine and pecked me a few times on the lips then closed his eyes and stayed silent for a few seconds, just holding me close to him. My eyes darted all over his face, trying to find something appropriate to say, yet words failed me.

“Maybe I shouldn’t have done that, but I’ve been meaning to since I saw you crossing the street to meet me”

Looking back, if I had to pinpoint the moment things changed for the both of us, I would say it was this one. Because this, was when I threw caution to the wind. It was like I couldn’t get enough of him. So I kissed him this time.

Laughing against my lips he pecked me once, twice. Then held my hand and continued walking in the direction of the restaurant.

***

I was a blushing mess the remaining walk to the restaurant. Even when we asked for a table for two, I couldn’t keep it together. In fact, I felt my face grow even hotter, if it was even possible.

“That blush is fucking adorable” Jamie whispered in my ear and his hand crept lower, which did not help at all with my blushing.

The waitress raised her eyebrows at Jamie’s blunt movement but led us to a table in the far corner of the room.

“I don’t do this often, not with many girls” He blurted suddenly, still looking down at the menu. I’d decided to order the french burger and was waiting expectantly for him to decide, yet this had caught me completely by surprise. His warm eyes met mine in a piercing gaze “I don’t want anything serious either”

“I just egged my exe’s Audi, I can barely stomach a burger let alone a serious relationship” I blurted honestly and he grinned. I had just found my way into Jamie’s heart.

He grabbed my hand while he ordered for the both of us and when he ordered a taxi to take us back to my place. He continued to hold it while we kissed in the elevator, and when we continued to do so everywhere in my apartment.

Jamie Lee Oliver held my hand the way he held my heart, and I don’t remember him ever letting go.

#writing #short fiction #short snippet #story #romance #new adult #mmusings #rvwchck

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rvwchck · 6 years

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Music Review: Side Effects.

you can also find it here

The Chainsmokers released a new song called Side Effects on July 27th and me, being the fangirl I am, was all fort it.

Sadly, it was not at all what I was expecting. Side Effects features Emily Warren, a female singer that brings a raspy turn to what people know and identify The Chainsmokers for. Adding that to the funky vibe of the song that the guitar contributes, it looks like Andrew and Alex went for a complete change in sound.

The change in sound is not a new move from artists neither is it something fans of the Chainsmokers haven't predicted it could happen. Since their album "Memories...Do Not Open" dropped in 2017, the once EDM group showed a strong inclination towards pop.

However, the disappointment in Side Effects does not come from the change in sound but the song as a whole. The Chainsmokers, romantic songwriters, shows the world their view on impulsive relationships. But with the constant repetition of the verses, it becomes monotonous and the sense of the song is lost and becomes redundant. When it comes to the sound, it lacks the 'drop' or climax that would make the song stand out from the ones that have been released recently. The lack of variety is what makes this song lose its originality, and it takes out the value of the funky sounds that would make Side Effects stand out from the songs that they have recently released.

It could become a summer anthem like Closer and many others have in previous years, but this song does a poor job in representing The Chainsmokers as the musicians they have become over the years.

#music #review #my opinion #the chainsmokers #song #band #electronic #pop #rock #andrew taggart #alex pall #side effects #new song #new track #new album #my work #new single #emily warren #rvwchck

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rvwchck · 3 years

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a rainbow of grey

Back when art wasn’t only an elective for an easy A, I was told to paint a landscape using my hands. It was to get us used to colours and understanding that the sky is blue, the grass is green. Or so I was told that day, after all the kids laughed at my drawing. The teacher then explained that the sky wasn’t brown nor was the grass pink, but I couldn’t get past the fact that all the colours looked the same to me. They were all a mix of greys and whites on the canvas, so the concept of “the sun is yellow” was the same as “the ocean is blue”. My teacher told this to my parents at one of their meetings, and my mother hung the painting on the wall. She didn’t understand back then that the art classes would become a problem to me.

When I grew older, my middle school art teacher called my parents because I refused to use colors other than black or white on my canvas. My mother laughed it off and congratulated me for the family portrait of the three of us, and once again, hung it on the wall.

My teachers couldn’t understand that colors made no difference in a world of black and white. So when I moved to high school, I swore off art altogether, getting my electives elsewhere. Soon, art became my enemy, so it came as a huge surprise to me when I fell in love with an artist.

I opened the door and there she was, with the widest grin I’ve ever seen on her face. She wasted no time in dragging me inside her tiny apartment and planting her lips on mine and in a matter of seconds, every tense muscle in my body relaxed.

It didn’t matter that my chances of ever seeing color were next to none, nor did the risk of dying on the table for having surgery. The second she entered my line of vision, she became the only thing I wanted to focus on.

“Hi” Serena rested her forehead on mine and closed her eyes, as if she wanted to stay in this position forever.

“That was some hello” I kissed her once again, I couldn’t get enough of her “If this is how all our dates are going to go, I don’t think we’ll ever see the outside of your room”.

Serena’s eyes lit up as I spoke and she jumped away from me in excitement, practically sprinting to the living room, where I was met with a strong smell of wet paint and tacos.

One thing about having an artist as a girlfriend, she is unfamiliar with the concept of cleaning. A huge, white canvas was propped against the wall, along with many other finished ones. On top of the dining room table was an array of different kinds of paints and brushes, going from watercolours and acrylics to glitter glue and indian ink. The huge pile of papers labeled “first grade final project” was enough for me to understand why I hadn’t seen her all week.

Being in a relationship with an artist implied accepting from the beginning that my clothes would be constantly stained. Being in a relationship with an artist and elementary school art teacher, meant date nights over wine and grading watercolour assignments. Having achromatopsia added an interesting perspective.

Judging from the space cleared around the blank canvas, this was not going to be a regular date night.

“Okay so tonight we’re doing something I’ve wanted to do for a while” Serena bit her lip, and looked everywhere besides my eyes. Saying that she was uncomfortable would be the understatment of the year.

“Babe, you know I don’t do art” I eyed the paint warily and she smiled in amusement.

“I know we’ve had this conversation more than a million times. But I love art, and painting and getting my hands dirty and so deep inside my imagination that I get lost for hours. And I want you to experience that too. But before we even get to that point, you’re going to follow me” She spoke seriously, something she did not do often, which made me listen to her every word.

Serena led me to the kitchen, where she opened the oven and placed her hands in front of it. After a few seconds of shamelessly staring, she turned and motioned me to copy her.

My hands and face warmed up almost immediately and being the middle of June, it was not the most pleasant feeling.

“This is red” She spoke quietly, as if it were a secret “Red is heat and red is danger. When you get angry or embarassed, that’s red.”

I looked at her in awe, and suddenly the heat I was feeling did not matter anymore. She stood up and placed her warm hand in mine, dragging me towards her balcony. I was surrounded by plants, all in different pots of different sizes. She grabbed one of the tiny pots and walked over to me.

“Feel the soft leaves? The wet soil? That’s green. Grass, trees and almost every plant there is. Green is life, and hope and happiness”

The pot suddenly felt heavier, but I didn’t want to stop holding it. In that moment, I could have stayed in the balcony, watching the plants for hours. I tried to picture them green, the way Serena described them and wondered if the balcony looked as amazing for her.

But before I could even open my mouth to speak, she was dragging me back inside the apartment and through the back door. Although it took more walking, we made it to the outside pool in her apartment complex and I watched as she took her shoes off and sat down by the edge.

I mimicked her position, and waited patiently for the next color.

“Water is blue. Oceans, lakes, pools, that’s blue. Blue is huge, it’s everything and nothing at the same time. It’s relaxing and sad, a cold color all around” I listened to her intently, closing my eyes and thinking of all those summers spent in the beach. We stayed there, our feet pruning the more time we spent out by the pool. By the time Serena stood up and extended her hand to me once again, I was convinced I’d follow her anywhere.

#writing #short fiction #short snippet #story #romance #new adult #mmusings #rvwchck

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