I don't belong to any side. What's more, I think flags are nothing but painted rags that represent rancid emotions. Just seeing someone wrapped up in one of them, spewing out hymns, badges and speeches, gives me the runs. I've always thought that anyone who needs to join a herd so badly must be a bit of a sheep himself.
Carlos Ruiz Zafon, The Prisoner of Heaven
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Anyway I love hua cheng has """kidnapped"""" xie lian fics. It's about the chaos. The shenanigans! The duality of the heavenly Court freaking out! Cut to hualian having a cute date! Jun wu mentally trying to rearrange his plans realistically sending xie lian to investigate should have disrupted their relationship why are they now getting married??? Xie lian popping in to the heavenly group chat going I'm FINE!!! Please please stop sending people to rescue me. Yes I've definitely been kidnapped let it go!!
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Hold the fuck up, Deep Night!
We got older women GL!
We got James and Great!
AND WE GOT FUCKING POLY!
Alexa, play DJ Sammy's "Heaven" because WE'RE IN HEAVEN!
Cheewin gave me poly, and just like that, he is forgiven for his Playboyy and War of Y bullshit! He gave me a great sex story in Bed Friend, and I loved the chaos of Middleman's Love, Secret Crush on You, and That's My Candy, so . . .
Ya ottta Petty Prison, sir!
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Feeling angsty about the Angel again…
Aziraphale was horrified to give Crowley holy water. He wouldn’t hear of it, he was terrified at the thought of Crowley using it. He didn’t want to give Crowley “a suicide pill,” in his own words.
He was always terrified what Hell would do to Crowley throughout history. If Hell found out they’d been consorting and fraternizing…“They’ll destroy you.”
He was holding onto Crowley in Edinburg, totally and hopelessly in love having watched Crowley display more kindness and compassion and self-sacrifice than any angels Aziraphale knows, when Hell quite literally ripped him out of his arms.
He fell in love with Crowley the moment he met the Starmaker. Even then, he warned Crowley of the dangers of questioning God. Aziraphale has always just wanted Crowley to be okay, to be safe.
Think about it… Aziraphale met Crowley Pre-fall. Aziraphale wanted to keep Crowley safe even back then, “word to the wise,” and couldn’t protect him. He saw or heard about the Fall—one day Crowley was there, the next Aziraphale is hearing (or worse: watching) him be cast down to this new place full of unspeakable and terrifying horrors called Hell. Crowley’s fall was obviously traumatic for Crowley and the fandom does a wonderful job acknowledging that, but how traumatic is it to watch someone you love Fall? To be totally helpless in that scenario?
To watch this beautiful creature be cast out and labeled as unforgivable, to hear them accept that and start calling themselves unforgivable when you never thought they did anything to warrant a need for forgiveness in the first place. “I knew the Angel you were.” I know you didn’t deserve any of this.
All he has ever wanted is for Crowley to be ok, to be safe. I read another meta where someone said Aziraphale purposely made the Bentley “our car” so Hell couldn’t pop in and grab Crowley anymore (property of an Angel + Shax couldn’t pop in anymore = safety), and told Crowley to watch the bookshop since he’s safe in there. Honestly I wouldn’t put it past Az to think that far ahead (he is intelligent and gayer than a tree full of monkeys on nitrous oxide).
These are a lot of half-baked ideas but I hope y’all see what I mean: Aziraphale wants Crowley safe because he has loved Crowley for 6,000 years, and in turn worried about Crowley for just as long. He just wants to take care of his love but the current systems of power in place make that utterly impossible and I think that breaks his heart every single day. I think the worry has been eating away at Aziraphale for 6,000—having such constant real and intense fear for your loved ones well-being is traumatic.
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HEAVEN IS A PRISON: BLACK AND WHITE EDITION
full 8 pages up on patreon (public post) (click a link why dontcha!)
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BAEL (King) / AGARES (Duke) / VASSAGO (Prince)
(These were Patreon exclusive since November 2023)
2023-2024 Re-Demon Project
Heaven Prison © Caim Luna
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