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beihonglin · 5 years

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anyway i met bei honglin and he’s an actual angel and we don’t deserve him: a recap

also this is more than 5k words so like ! prepare yourselves!

fhdjjd okay so in april honglin’s hyh brought up his birthday party in his gc and I was like :——) that’s when spring sem ends I could actually make it

fast forward through a lot of encouraging by summer miss @91percentchaoze (sobs I rly owe summer my life) and a lot of anxiety about flights and a lot of other stresses in between

and June 2nd I’m in shanghai with mirthe miss @honglinsmacaroni and meggi and summer ie three of the cutest people in the world!!!

when we get to banana there were already other fans there waiting at the event space and the hyh was giving out seat numbers and stuff

so meggi was 10, summer was 11, mirthe was 14 and I was 15

and we started giving out the slogans and stuff we printed until the staff chased us out so they could set up

and so we were chilling first in Starbucks w the other fans fhdjjfjf they’re rly so cute I was finally able to put faces to weibo handles & they finally realised they were talking to someone who’s actually shit at speaking Chinese lmao

then when it got to 2 o’clock we moved outside near the entrance of the event space (since the event space was supposed to be open to us at 2)

but they got the time wrong and we ended up only being able to go in at nearly 3

which isn’t important anyway bc !!! we saw tangram walking in !!!

okay so we saw this white blob coming out from the main banana building and walking towards one of the side buildings and we were like

whomst

and it wAS JINGZUO JSDKAHFKJDH

and summer or mirthe waved at him and he was like bitch wtf and squinted

like ??? who the heckity is waving at me but then eventually he connected the dots and was like o yah fans so he waved back fhdchdkhcjdjf

and he just walked on what a king ??????

summer was right I was surprisingly more chill than I thought I would be fhdjfjfjjf I thought I would cry but I didn’t

so we waited around a bit longer, got suntans and sunburns and slightly dehydrated

and then honglin walks out

my god y’all he’s a whole goddamn angel he’s not real I’m telling you he’s unreal

I KNOW I said the last time that yanjun is rly unphotogenic and all the photos don’t do him justice but leT ME TELL YOU

THE ENTIRE BANANA FAMILY IS LIKE THIS THEYRE UNREAL

THEYRE ALL BANANA PEELS IN HUMAN SUITS THEIR VISUALS ARE ??? NOT HUMAN

but yah at first I was like o he’s gonna go through the back exit to the event space he’s not gonna come this way

AND THEN HE CAME THIS WAY

fhdjfjfj i didn’t take a video but if I did u would probs hear me go “o shit he’s coming” fhdjfjfj

and mirthe was like I’M GONNA TELL HIM UR WEIBO HANDLE I’M GONNA TELL HIM YOU’RE ASTROFIREWORKS and I was like NO so then we had a little back and forth for a while tHAT HONGLIN SAW FBDJHFJF

I don’t rmb a lot of it bc I was mainly in shock that he was in front of me so I was mostly like :——) heckie!

but he went through the front entrance and the moment he made it inside I lost my shit fbdjfjjff

mirthe sent a picture of me just kneeling at the entrance contemplating my entire life to the group chat fhdjfhdj apparently I said that I wanted to go home fhdjfjfjjf

and then zhixie and jingzuo came out soBS

ZHIXIE IS SO BEAUTIFUL IRL U DONT UNDERSTAND HIS CHEEKBONES ARE INSANE

also he had black hair again and the cuTEST HAT ON and we promptly lost our shit

Jingzuo,,,,, in a plain white shirt and blue jeans and converse,,,, someone PLEASE stop him

but they went in and we cried

and waited outside bc ruotian and chaoze still hadn’t gone in but then someone came to tell us chaoze was off filming for his show so he wasn’t coming & somehow ruotian had alr made it into the building without us noticing so eventually we all went in

and the chairs were so comfortable o my god they swivelled and they were like super squishy I love chairs

and then the best two hours of my tgm stan life started :—(

my god the moment honglin stepped on stage my entire heart melted he rly looked so good sobs

you’re completely right I’m dedicating an entire portion to his visuals

his eyes :—-( are so sparkly my god

and when he smiles his eyesmile???? he gets those rly deep wrinkles around his eyes and they’re actually beautiful????? ;;;;

he Radiates joy like i know i say this so often but their debut song??? radiant??? written For him,,,

also when he smiles it’s so warm like you find yourself smiling along bc he rly and genuinely means it and is happy and your heart just warms up bc he’s happy and i just

man i l*ve him

okay so the first segment zhixie was like “what do y’all love about beibei”

and everyone was yelling different things like “he’s so handsome” and “so talented” and “his vocals” and someone also yelled “he can eat a lot” and zhixie was like ??? bro whAt

also someone said “he spoils his fans a lot” and my god y’all it’s so so true but more in that at the very end of this recap

I couldn’t even say anything rip bc my entire brain was set in English and I was like ???? my god i wrote an entire post about the reasons I l*ve him but my mind is blankity blank

but then he was like well beibei’s great at pick up lines

so he did pick up lines based on scenarios zhixie gave fhdjfjfand most of them were old tsk

but he made up this rly cute one that went like 看花开不如看着你发呆 ‘people like looking at flowers bloom, but i’d rather look at you daydreaming’ and i UWUED SO HARD

and I didn’t realise this until meggi pointed it out after but when they put the scenarios on screen, they used a gender neutral “TA” instead of the gendered 她/他 ;;;;;

then they did this segment where honglin was supposed to go against three fans and do a tongue twister in the shortest time and in order of time they got to choose foods under cloches

honglin did so badly fhdjfjfj he got last place but idk if he did it on purpose so his fans could win

one fan got wasabi disguised as ice cream and zhixie was like EAT IT and honglin was like DONT

and he offered to eat the wasabi for her I’m sobbing he rly is so sweet

but zhixie was like NO SHE HAS TO EAT IT and everyone laughed bc he was so adamant fhdjfjfj i love zhixie with my entire soul

and thEN honglin goes okay y’all know how I posted that picture last night

(this picture)

my god I died when he posted it bc

1) I love that shirt what an expensive look

2) he was baking ;A;

and he made a half-baked cheesecake s o b s

he was like: “since i’m always posting vlogs and y’all always watch me eat I thought I’d make food for y’all this time” and I WEPT

and he was like oh give me a theme and i’ll decorate the cake around that theme

so they pulled out the box again and he picked random numbers

and they called out 4 and 15 and 27 to go on stage and I was like

wow I wonder who they are omg

and suddenly summer’s in my ear going MY GOD 15 IT’S YOU

me:

me: what

zhixie: STOP DREAMING IT’S YOU

me: WHAT

hdsflgkjhdfkhgjdsfgkhksfgkdjhdfgkjhsdgjh

and the entire time i was mouthing to mirf and meggi like I CAN’T SPEAK CHINESE I’M GOING TO GO UP AND FORGET THAT I’M BILINGUAL I’M GOING TO BE BYELINGUAL I’M

and they were mouthing back sPEAK ENGLISH and i was like oK

and then it was my turn and i was shaking so so so hard ????

like i’m so so so bad in front of crowds i’ve shaken my way through every marketing presentation ever bc i hATE public speaking and now i have to go up in front of two angels?????

mirf and meggi were like THAT’S ASTROFIREWORKS and i didn’t realise until i checked the group chat after that zhixie said yAY KJDHSKSJAHKJA

and summer was like SHE FLEW IN FROM NEW YORK kjdshfkahdgjfhagjd

and zhixie was like wait do u speak chinese

and i blANKED OUT I WAS LIKE YES BUT FAM NO

but he only took the yes and was like ok thaNK GOD I DONT HAVE TO TRANSLATE

inside i was like fAM WHO THE HECKITY DO U THINK TRANSLATES YOUR VIDEOS I CAN DO IT FOR U KASJDHFLSKJDHKH but outside i was just ah yes :—)

and zhixie and honglin said something about english but my mind was blank all i could do was stare at honglin like

y’all

i know i said he was unreal but

up close

he’s literally ??? a whole angel like ????????????? his eyes sparkle so much when he laughs my heart STOPPED

and when they asked me to step closer i was like

actually i can translate for u i’m-

and zhixie was like NO THERE’S NO NEED like akdsfhkjkjdshJKASDHK OK

then honglin asked what theme i wanted and i was likE FAM IDK I’VE BEEN BLANKING THE ENTIRE TIME STARING AT YOU

so i was like okay i know u rly like one piece so something maybe one piece related

and he was like fam that’s difficult sadjkfhalsKJSDHLKJASD

but the moment i opened my mouth

zhixie: ARE YOU SINGAPOREAN OR MALAYSIAN

me: uh i’m singapor-

honglin: uwu i can hear it

me: about to die

zhixie (in english): ur accent !

and god yall my entire heart burst into flames like

i’ve said it before here but i’ve spent quite a bit of time being ashamed of my accent bc when i first got to america nobody could understand my singaporean accent and everyone kept asking me to repeat myself and eventually i was like ok u know what it’s better if i just shut up and not talk

and so the reason why i’m so so so proud of zhangjing (and jj) is bc there finally is ?? some south east asian representation and there are even people complimenting his accent and calling it cute and it ?? finally felt like i shouldn’t be embarrassed about the way i speak??

zhixie: when i heard you i was like eh? it’s almost like i heard you zhangjing

and i

Cried

and then zhixie turned to meggi and mirthe and were like yall come from beijing?

like fam what

and meggi was like no we come from belgium

zhixie: malaysian? you?

about ten people correcting him: belgium

zhixie, again: malaysian?

kajsdhflasjdkhfkj

and then zhixie said some other words but yall i was

just watching honglin

his hands are so so so so beautiful like his fingers are rly nice and

his nose ??? work of art

also his hands looked so soft like :—(

he was just bent over the cake and he :—( rly truly a goddamn angel

summer took photos of me that i’m never releasing ever sakdfhaksjdhfds i look so COMPLETELY WHIPPED FOR HIM LIKE

and at one point he started plucking cherries and one stalk fell on the floor and i was like o no so i went forward to pick it up and he

looked up

and said ‘oh it’s okay’ and smiled and

my heart stopped i think i left my soul on stage

O SHIT OKAY AND THEN ZHIXIE WALKED OVER AND WAS LIKE

CAN I ASK WHAT YOU’RE THINKING U LOOK LIKE YOU’RE LOSING UR MIND

AND I WAS LIKE FAM U DONT UNDERSTAND I A M

and i was like ‘idk i’m just ?? very shookt’

and zhixie was like what??? shy????

me: 很惊讶 (very shocked)

zhixie: shy? ? ??

me, thinking: fam this is how i feel when i translate yall captionless vlogs

zhixie (in eng): is this ur first time seeing honglin?

me: my first time seeing you also !!!!!

zhixie, suddenly shy: ah okay thank u

UWU!!!

and then honglin was done and looked up and i might have died inside again

AND HE WALKED OVER AND I WAS LIKE FAM NO DONT IF YOU COME CLOSER I’M LITERALLY GOING TO DI E??????

and he was like ‘oh this is zoro’

the sane part of me: oh wait ur favourite character is zoro???

bc liTERALLY TWO DAYS BEFORE HE POSTED ABOUT SANJI AND SO MY SISTER AND I WERE LIKE OH HE PROBS LIKES SANJI

BUT HE

LIKES ZORO

(my sister, afterwards: wtf i feel lied to)

but he was so heckin close to me like fam my heart

stopped

honglin: i hope u like it uwu

me: heck !

honglin: take one bite!

me: HECKITYHECK

zhixie (in eng): i wanna see ur facial expression

aND THEN THEY WERE BOTH LOOKGIN AT ME LIKE FUCABJS,BCD

FUCINADJCNSAKJDKJ

honglin: is it okay? ;;

me: FUCIJNSKCSADJ YES TAKE MY HEART TAKE MY SOUL

and i finally FINALLY FUNIAJKNSSK FINALLY GOT OFF THE GODDAMN STAGE

zhixie: WHERE’S HER APPLAUSE

anD EITHER RUOTIAN OR JINGZUO UPSTAIRS STARTED CLAPPING AGAINST THEIR MIC LIKE ASDFAHKSDHFAKSJD SHUT UP

AND I WANTED TO DIE I WALKED ITNO A CARDBOARD CUTOUT RIGHT AFTER BC I WAS SO SHOOK

and honglin was like be careful! there’s a cardboard cutout right there! bc he’s a whoLE ANGEL

but also like GKASCKASHDHFAJDSHLFKJ PLS STOP LOOKIGN AT ME PLEAS E MY HEART IS WEAK I’M

my god

collapsed into summer’s arms right after thank god for summer !!!

okay then the next segment zhixie was like o yall know honglin’s position in the group is main vocal so next he can sing something for yall

honglin: actually i prepared an entire song for yall but music copyright means that i can’t sing it w a backing track

bc if he sings w a copyrighted backing track or if he sings more than half the song the livestream video would have to be taken down or something??

but it didn’t matter bc the moment he opened his mouth my entire heart STOPPED like

if he stabbed me in the stomach it would have hurt less his voice is so so sososos ososososososoosososo beautiful ????

and he sang without a backing track to like ????

i’m telling yall he’s a whole angel like he’s not real

and then honglin was like oh i also prepared another song but bc i now see there are overseas fans here i’m gonna sing an english song

and he sang when i was your man by bruno mars and when he hit the high note i think i ascended into the afterlife

about the 46 minute mark here i RLY AND TRULY RECOMMEND LISTENING TO IT SOBS HE SOUNDS LIKE THE PERFECT ANGEL HE IS

AND ZHIXIE HARMONISED AT THE BACK LIKE AHHHHH THAT’S MY BABE MAIN VOCAL TAGTEAM RIGHT THERE

and then zhixie asked if there was any other song we wanted and i was immediately like JJ!!

i’ve been ??? pleading for a jj cover forEVER ND HE

FINALLY PULLED THROUGH

honglin: i’m going to do Those Were The Days bc like the song says (那些你很冒险的梦我陪你去疯 - all those adventurous dreams, i’ll chase them with you), i’ve been chasing my dream and yall have been here with me every step of the way

and i think the moment he said it i DIED like ???? jj is one of my favourite singers and nearly all my faves have covered his songs at least once, astro included???

and everyone who knows me knows i love jj like nini miss @tanqram has literally made a tangram singing jj compilation that i watch religiously ??? and this is one of my fave jj songs?????

and the moment he opened his mouth like ???? i KNOW i said that i died the last two times he sang but

firstly he sounds so much like jj?????

and secondly everything was ???? perfect??????

like i judge jj covers hard bc i’ve listened to the originals so many times everything is ingrained and the moment something is off i cringe but

yall

honglin’s perfect honglin is Actually Perfect

ALSO HE SOUNDS SO MUCH LIKE JJ LIKE HE RLY WASN’T LYING IN HIS IP INTRODUCTION

and afterwards honglin was like lol jj said before that whenever he sings high notes he starts sweating and immediately jingzuo (???) was like TAKE OFF UR CLOTHES LKAJDHSFKASJDHFK

jingzuo chaotic good!!!

also i didn’t know until afterwards when the fantakens were out but ruotian was eating chicken wings and slurping noodles the whole time upstairs aksjdflhaksdjfhaksj why is didi line chaos

and then zhixie was like yall know what other things beibei is good at?

like fam he’s good at everything we rly can’t

also someone in the back was like he’S GREAT AT DOING THE SPLITS and honglin’S FACE AJSDFHKSJDHF

but it was languages and so zhixie was like we’re gonna make him say i love u in many different languages

and i could FEEL marta miss @honeyforzhixie going ????? isn’t that ur thing zhixie jsdgflasjdhf

and so they started discussing languages and zhixie was like o i know u can speak a little japanese bc i know u memorised the entire one piece theme song

and i SCREAMED INSIDE bc we literally juST TALKED ABOUT IT THAT MORNING WHEN WE VIDEO CALLED NINI nkfhakjsdhf we were like uwu we hope he sings a jj song but then we were like o lol what if he ended up singing the one piece theme song instead bc we bet he knew the whoLE THING AND HE DOES KNOW IT AJSDFHLAK

but then zhixie made honglin imitate maotong and say ‘i love u’ the way maotong would and my heart ached a little i miss my baby boy so much ??

but JINGZUO CHAOTIC GOOD JSDHLAKJ ‘could u imitate chaoze too’ jaskdlfhkjd

and so he did a couple different versions like Japanese (he and jingzuo screamed lines from one piece at each other ajdkhflksd) and korean (he took a line out of some korean drama?????)

and someone suggested french (was it mirf?????) and i lAUGHED rip his french vlog sorry honglin i swear i love u !!

and then they were like ok time to play his fan video

okay listen i have to preface this by saying that when i got the brief from the hyh she told me ‘it’s best if we make him cry!’ and i was like ok! sure!

turns out it made ME cry i stressed out over the video for two entire weeks sobs the moment my finals were over i locked myself into nyu’s computer lab until moving out day but still couldn’t finish it so i had to work on it on the plane ride home too sobs my roommate connie miss @ynajun saw the worst of it bc every time i came home from the lab i’d stress about it ???

but my god it was worth ??? everything ????

he ?????? cried??????

and like on one hand i’m happy that i managed to fulfil the brief but also i feel bad bc he cried but also mostly i laughed bc he’s such a sweet emotional bub

BUT ALSO BC HE CRIED MEGGI GOT TO OFFER HIM HER TISSUES!!!!!!!!

like we specially bought tissues before we left for banana bc we were like we’re gonna need them bc we’re gonna cry

BUT IT TURNS OUT HONGLIN NEEDED HTEM MORE AJSDKFHLASJDHFKAJ

zhixie: he cries every year during his birthday

zhixie: but also even when it’s not his birthday he cries he cried at my birthday too

and afterwards in chaoze’s birthday post he called honglin a crybaby too UWUWUWUWU

tangent but on his birthday when he came into the group chat he thanked us again for the video and i Died

okay this next part is purely speculation bc i honestly might just be overinflating myself and he might have done this purely coincidentally but when he thanked us for his video he looked at me and i ?????

when the video was playing nini and marta were yelling in the gc that they knew the video was done by me bc i overuse cc particle world on after effects jasdhlfksjdh but in that moment i briefly entertained the thought that he was familiar enough with my edits to know that the only idiot who keeps using cc particle world was me ??

but also as i said purely speculation and probably coincidence so

anyway you can watch it here

and then they played the birthday video messages from fans and i think i died from embarrassment let’s Not talk about it

but also i only realised it after they pointed it out in the gc but apparently zhixie and honglin were both singing along to the jj backing track i added to my video ajsdfhlaksjd

my god another tangent but on his birthday when he came into the group chat we were talking about the videos we recorded

and hh (one of honglin’s og fans she’s a whole angel too I love her !!!!) was like my gOD i rly am so unphotogenic (when she filmed her video she put a ‘FAT’ over her face sobs but like mood) and i was like yah same lol i had to record myself like ten times in times square bc i looked so bad in all the takes

and honglin was like HH WHY DID U CENSOR UR FACE UR CLEARLY SO CUTE and we collectively died for her uwu !!!!

then honglin rePLIED ME SAYING ‘OH BUT TIMES SQUARE HAS SUCH A GOOD VIBE’ and i died for the nth time ??? and then he followed up by saying ‘i rly want to go to times square i’ve gone to america a lot of times when i was younger but i’ve only ever been to the west coast’ jksadhlfkjshekj pls come i’ll bring u around east coast best coast

but back to the point he was like ‘i’ve said it before during ip (and he did!!! during the fanfan episode where he was talking to the rubbish bin he rly has said it before!!!!) but i rly try my best to remember every single person’s face and all my fan’s weibo IDs’ and my heART MELTED HE

and then it was his ending ment!!

he said something that rly threw my heart off a cliff he said that he’s so grateful for the hyh and fans for listening to him and donating to charities in his name instead of buying him extravagant gifts bc when he makes it big, if he makes it big, the thing he wants to do the most is to donate to children who come from a less privileged family background bc he knows what it’s like coming from a single parent family and ;n;

then they showed wishes from other idols!!!!!

there was wang ziyi, zhou rui, the twins my ip hEART

LISTEN I ??? when zuo qibo showed up my SWIN HEART EXPLODED I ??? MISS ??? MY SWIN ANGELS ????

AND THEN RUIBIN SHOWED UP IN ALL HIS UNKEMPT AND UNSHAVEN AND RAMBLING GLORY AND MY PRINCERUIBIN HEART WEPT I THINK I HELD SUMMER’S ARM SO HARD SHE GOT BRUISES AJKSDHFKSJD I’M SO SORRY SUMMER I LOVE U

and then cHAOZE APPEARED !!!! and everyone immediately melted he’s the softest leader alive i love my baby!!

and honglin was about to say something but ruOTIAN

ruotian showed up w a cake w sparklers???????? like fam???????

and eventually we had to say goodbye :—(

but honglin was like o i rly and truly thought that there would be lesser people at this birthday than there was last year and my heart ??? broke ????

bc the room they were in last year alr was so small and there were rly little roses but he ??? genuinely thought he had so little fans that he wouldn’t even fill up the room ;;;;;;;; bc there rly are v little active roses both on weibo like there are less than ten of us who actively post in his chaohua and at tgm events like they’re mostly lrt/jjz fans and there’s usually only one rose ;;;;

but listen honglin our entire gc would die for you we will never stop loving u until every last one of us is found dead in a ditch

and then we’ll love u into the next life

also after he said goodbye he was like sike!

he kept singing behind the cardboard cutouts and peeking around them to say hi again

at some point I poked my head over and went PLS COME TO NEW YORK and he said something back that I alas couldn’t hear rip

and then he started singing along to jj again sobs

but eventually at some point they left via the back door and I was like GOTTA GO THIS IS LITERALLY WHAT I’VE BEEN TRAINING FOR sobs going to the airport for yanjun and wenjun and jeffrey and ziyi and kunkun rly was to prepare me for one thing and one thing only and it was to practise getting good non-shaky fantakens without dying???

jingzuo rly truly looked AMAZING he rly rocks the white tee blue jeans and converse look jingzuo stans stay winning!!!

and honglin ;;;;;;; was holding my banner ;;;;;;;;

and he looked directly into my camera a couple times sobs and he shot hearts too I rly ???? Editing the photos made me cry so many times fbdjhfjf every time I got to those photos I lose my mind

ALSO ONLY AFTER EDITING THE PHOTOS I REALISED RUOTIAN WAS JUDGING ME SO HARD GHDJFJ my eyes were glued to honglin the entire time but looking at the photos again ruotian looked so unamused fhcjfhfbfhbf

speaking of ruotian my gOD editing photos with him in it is a nightmare y’all he’s either blinking or looks like he’s about to sneeze in nearly every picture fhdjfjfj summer and I generally make it a rule not to blur other members’ faces out of our fantakens but ruOTIAN RLY TESTING ME

but we made it to the banana lobby and I didn’t want to follow them and their fansites in so I stopped walking and honglin turned back to wave at me ;;;;;;;;;;;;;; and i think i died again

and so I went back to the event space where summer and mirthe and meggi were waiting and sat down and blanked out sobs

but it diDNT END THERE FHDJFJJF FOR SOME REASON HONGLIN DECIDED TO WALK OUT AGAIN A BIT AFTER

so mirthe and I were like omg gotta blAST so we speedwalked over

and he :—-( saw and shot signs at my camera again fhdjfjfjjf I ???

and then it was Actually Over god I was a shell of a person after that

still am tbh I’m not sure how I survived sorting through our 2000+ fantakens fhdjfjfj

but I’m so spoiled y’all I’m really truly so spoiled by him :—(

like I said earlier he rly spoils his fans so much????

that night he posted on Instagram and immediately summer and meggi and mirthe and I commented and he replied all four of us ;n;

earlier on in spring semester there was a third party event that Tangram was invited to but the organiser was a MESS and tgm wasn’t treated very well??? but honglin was worried that the fans who travelled to the event and didn’t get to see them were upset so he came into the group chat to console them ;;;;;

and I was talking to another fan and she said that even during other events he kept turning around to wave at the fans and acknowledge them and it’s ;;;;;; as someone who has ?? waited in the rain / stood for hours waiting for idols something as simple as a nod or a smile rly warms u up and makes the wind and cold worth it ;;;; and he makes sure to do it all the time ;;;;;;;;;

on his birthday !! his birthday !! when he was in Taiwan and should be resting and enjoying time w his mum and not thinking about us !!!! he still came into the group chat for an hour and talked to us ;;;;;;

and he named all his sort of more well known fans’ IDs, even the ones who weren’t online and sending messages at the time ;;;;; like he rly wasn’t lying when he said he remembers us ;;;;

also fhdjfjfjjf god I’m so spoiled he replied me so many times ?? like there was the times sq thing and the east coast thing ???

and when he said he was training for the next archery competition I was like “o are u shooting recurve or compound this time?” and he was like “o idk if I shot recurve or compound but it’s the one I shot the last time” and I fhdjfjfjfhfb

tangential but 1) my god y’all his form is beautiful my archery heart: exploded

2) his rhotics are so beautiful too my phonology heart: also exploded

also when he was about to leave the gc I was like “huh but u just got here, why are you leaving?” and he sent another voice message “astrofireworks, why are you becoming shameless too, when did I just get here, I’ve clearly been here for a long time already” fhdjfjdjfn fhdjjd

also my GOD He was reading some IDs and summer and lyla were like what about @astrofireworks and I was like fchjfbhjdf y’all it’s ok he’s alr said it in another voice message two months ago in the gc I’m alr so spoiled I ???? rly shouldn’t ask anything else of him or he’s going to hate me

but then he

sent

a whole

nine second message

“hey astrofireworks, I hope one day I can go to New York and maybe... I’ll meet you there, okay?”

and I ??,?? Sobbed

ndjdbfjvcchhxhdhfh

and then Connie went to send him off at the airport in Taiwan the next day and ?????

I’m not gonna say much because it’s rly conno’s story to tell and I’m not sure how much I’m allowed to say outside the gc but he rly spoils his fans so so so so much ????

anyway bei honglin rly and truly is the sweetest boy on earth we rly don’t deserve him ;;;;; this first week of June truly has been the best week of my cpop stan life and i ????? love mister bei honglin with my entire heart and soul ;;;;;;;;;;;;

#bei honglin #honglin #tangram #贝汯璘 #banana #my god i hope this posts it's so long

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bluebeetle · 7 years

Text

WAS TAGGED BY: @bakusuki :0

TAGGING: im not tagging 20 lol but: @transgirlagenttexas @topazinc @kujohat @kidnap @skybean @paarsetulpen @ceili88 @lizardgays @luruar @marquise-spinneret @s-fellows-art

yall dont have to do it tho if you dont want.

RULES: ANSWER THESE 85 STATEMENTS AND TAG 20 PEOPLE

THE LAST

1. DRINK: Orange juice cuz we havent gotten groceries in awhile and ive consumed all like 5 bottles of apple juice so its all thats left ghfhghf 2. PHONE CALL: my grandma 3. TEXT MESSAGE: My coworker 4. SONG YOU LISTENED TO: technically that new taylor swift song but that was to mock the music video, for real listening was Starboy by the Weeknd. 5. TIME YOU CRIED: possibly last night i dont remember. recently. 6. DATED SOMEONE TWICE: >implying i date. (no) 7. KISSED SOMEONE AND REGRETTED IT: nope 8. BEEN CHEATED ON: no 9. LOST SOMEONE SPECIAL: lol yeah 10. BEEN DEPRESSED: yes. today. 11. GOTTEN DRUNK AND THROWN UP: no i avoid alcohol bc anxiety of getting addicted lmao

3 FAVOURITE COLOURS

12. pale green 13. pale pink. 14. burgundy

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU

15. MADE NEW FRIENDS: probably??? yeah i think so! some cool people at work and mutuals on here. not close friends or anything but its a start. 16. FALLEN OUT OF LOVE: nah son 17. LAUGHED UNTIL YOU CRIED: yeah doesnt help i cry easily. 18. FOUND OUT SOMEONE WAS TALKING ABOUT YOU: my friend’s GF trashtalks me at work. shes coworkers with my older brother AND my mother :) 19. MET SOMEONE WHO CHANGED YOU: id like to think so! 20. FOUND OUT WHO YOUR FRIENDS ARE: to an extent yeah.....i guess. 21. KISSED SOMEONE ON YOUR FACEBOOK LIST: nah

GENERAL

22. HOW MANY OF YOUR FACEBOOK FRIENDS DO YOU KNOW IN REAL LIFE: all but one! theyre mostly friends, school friends, family, or friends from conventions except Connor who ive known for 7 years but never met irl yet. i send him a letter when i can tho!! 23. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS: ive got two cats, maddy and maya, and id die for em 24. DO YOU WANT TO CHANGE YOUR NAME: sometimes. people spell it wrong all the time, even my own dad does tht, and its associated with a celeberity and a Type of Cliche basically lol. i was almost named Zoe its a cute name. 25. WHAT DID YOU DO FOR YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY: study for university exams lol. went out for dinner with family prior to that. my friend got me pokemon black and black 2 tho so dont worry. 26. WHAT TIME DID YOU WAKE UP: 10 or 11? i couldnt sleep last night. 27. WHAT WERE YOU DOING AT MIDNIGHT LAST NIGHT: trying to sleep, failing, and reading JJBA fanfics. 28. NAME SOMETHING YOU CAN’T WAIT FOR: for my shirts i ordered online to finally come in this week!!!! or for the new pokemon game 29. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAW YOUR MOM: a half hour ago when she went o bed 31. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW: coco jambo - mr president, and hold onto your heart - Man Man (kinda going back and forth as each ends ghghf) 32. HAVE YOU EVER TALKED TO A PERSON NAMED TOM: ummmmm probably but i dont remember. 33. SOMETHING THAT IS GETTING ON YOUR NERVES: why ive been so Anxious and shit lately, family needing to be LOUD all the time. 34. MOST VISITED WEBSITE: tumblr, youtube, pokefarm. 35. HAIR COLOUR: medium brown 36. LONG OR SHORT HAIR: long? it goes passed my shoulders but i need to get it cut. 37. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON SOMEONE: maybe?? still trying to figure some shit out. 38. WHAT DO YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF: my eyes a cute girl liked them once, my face in general in good photos lol, my hips, my hair, my moles 39. PIERCINGS: none im awful with pain. 40. BLOOD TYPE: no idea. i do blood tests for a chronic illness i have but never bothered to ask 41. NICKNAME: britt 42. RELATIONSHIP STATUS: single. 43. ZODIAC: ares 44. PRONOUNS: she/her, they/them 45. FAVOURITE TV SHOW: bnha, justice league cartoon, daredevil if that counts 46. TATTOOS: none yet 47. RIGHT OR LEFT HANDED: right. 48. SURGERY: dental surgery but thats it. 50. SPORT: not a sport person. best i can do is sprinting and even then :// 51. VACATION: id love to return to london, paris, and rome or go to japan!!! 52. PAIR OF TRAINERS: i assume something to do with shoes um... idk i have a pair of pink ones but i mostly wear the red ones i hve. i usually get bright colours so people can find me.

MORE GENERAL

53. EATING: yogurt 54. DRINKING: nothing 55. I’M ABOUT TO: go to bed 56. WAITING FOR: jjba part 5 to be announced, school to start, work hours to start 57. WANT: to be able to sleep at night thanks... to do well in school 58. GET MARRIED: at some point, thatd be nice yeah..... 59. CAREER: something in the science field, with chemistry or biology. 60. HUGS OR KISSES: both r good but im more of a hug person. Its Warm. 61. LIPS OR EYES: hmmmm eyes theyre pretty and cute. fun to draw. 62. SHORTER OR TALLER: i dont rly care tbh 63. OLDER OR YOUNGER: prefer close to my age but probably a lil younger bc ill feel less intimidated lol (but like, not a minor) 64. NICE ARMS OR NICE STOMACH: TUMMIES!!!!!! 65. HOOK UP OR RELATIONSHIP: relationship. 66. TROUBLEMAKER OR HESITANT: hesitant. blame anxiety. sometimes impulsive tho.

HAVE YOU EVER:

67. KISSED A STRANGER: no. 68. DRANK HARD LIQUOR: no.. 69. LOST GLASSES/CONTACT LENSES: oh god yes. 70. TURNED SOMEONE DOWN: kinda..... in a bad way. 71. SEX ON THE FIRST DATE: no. 72. BROKEN SOMEONE’S HEART: maybe? 73. HAD YOUR HEART BROKEN: yeah.

74. BEEN ARRESTED: no. 75. CRIED WHEN SOMEONE DIED: yes, recently. 76. FALLEN FOR A FRIEND: yeah.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

77. YOURSELF: jguhghhg maybe. sometimes. 78. MIRACLES: yes 79. LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT: no. infatuation maybe, but real love takes time. 80. SANTA CLAUS: im not 8.

81. KISS ON THE FIRST DATE: eh each to their own. i dont care??? sure i guess.

82. ANGELS: no.

OTHER:

84. EYE COLOUR: green 85. FAVOURITE MOVIE: how to train your dragon, definitely.

#tru fax #me #long post

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monbabi · 7 years

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beautiful in la fanacc!!

• waited in line for 9 mcfreakin hours it was so hot we all bonded over kpop and the wait and wanting to die • at 7pm we went thru security and stood in the pit!!!!!!!!!! very tight but it was fine we were jus chillin • there was a technical problem so the start of the concert was delayed for like 30 more min • thEN THE LIGHTS DIMMED AND THE VCR TURNED ON AND WE WERE LIKE SHAHSKDOSHAGSV • AND MONSTA X CAME OUT IN ALL THEIR BEAUTY AND WE WERE ALL SCREECHING • they got into their positions and performed beautiful it was one of thr most beautiful fucking performances i have ever watched i almost cried • then they went straight into incomparable WHICH WAS FUCKING AMAZING KIHYUN KEPT COMING UP TO THE FRONT AND I WAS LIKE BACK WHERE U CAME FROM DEMON!! I LOVE U SO FUCKING MUCH • i realize now i shouldnt talk abt every single performance bc tht would take way too long • THE SOLO STAGES WERE SO GOOD SEEING HYUNGWON PERFORM FROM ZERO WITH WONHO!!!!!!! GOOD SHIT!!!!!! • and 24k was so…….séxie like it was fun and everyone sang along but their hips are SIN!!!!!!!!! ESPECIALLY MINHYUK!!!!!!! • SHOWNU LIKE DID A SPLIT OR SMTH I DIDNT SEE IT COMPLETELY BUT I SAW HIM DROP AND I WAS LIKE HOLY SHIT?? • mirror was absolutely beautiful and it was such an emotional stage i almost cried kihyun and jooheon did amazing • can i jus say tht minhyuk is absolutely stunningly handsome like im a complete slut for kihyun but my eyes kept wandering to minhyuk bc hes so goddamn beautiful • yall theyre so good live like. ofc theres backtrack but u could hear them so clearly and they were so stable i almost cried • AH all of them did aegyo except changkyun who sang nothing on you by b.o.b and everyone sang along it was fun • omg in the first ment minhyuk was like “im gonna do smth ive been wanting to do in la…….im gonna say hows the weather outside and u say its sunny” and we were like jesus christ okay so he was like HOWS THE WEATHER OUTSIDE and we were like ITS SUNNY!!!!!!! • wonho talking abt how he was in such a good mood bc hyungwon was there w them and he kept making funny faces @ them before the stage • AND IDK I FELT LIKE JOOHEON SMILED A LOT DURING THIS CONCERT LIKE HE WAS ALWAYS SMILING WHILE DANCING AND IT WAS SO CUTE • SO WAS SHOWNU HE KEPT SMILING WHEN HE DANCED IN THE FRONT IT WAS SO NDHSUSDJHSHA • hyungwon seemed kinda tired i jus wanted to scoop him up into my arms and rock him to sleep he didnt talk thaaaaat much but he did whisper amongst the members and laugh like the snarky ass he is • kihyun kept talking to the 2nd floor which was so sweet !!!!!! ahhhhhh!!! im glad they werent left out of anything • oh my god at one point hyungwon like choked on his water it gave me a heart attack • during changkyuns part in 하얀소녀 he started like. swaying his hips and minhyuk kneeled down next to him and started flapping his jacket and wonho joined in it was wild • changkihyuk were hypin up jooheon like “hm ex girl and 하얀소녀 are really good songs……bc U MADE THEM!!!!!!” and jooheon got all shy and squat down in a corner then he stood up and was like “YEA I MADE THOSE SONGS” • wonho kept mouthing along with the translator it was so cute and funny um king of bilingualism? • they kept telling us to “Stop, Calm Down” bc we’re los angeles and we dont shut up ever it was so funny • jooheon said la has a funky way of grooving to the rhythm but out of all the other us concerts we do it the best LOL • wonho: takes off jacket • jooheon: EVERYBODY MAKE SOME NOISE FOR HIS MUSCLES • wonho: turns around and flexes • they were throwing out candy during white sugar but i didnt catch any bc short arms dnhshansbd and they didnt really throw to the front middle pit kihyun kissed one and threw it out i hope tht person who caught it treasures it forever • I WAS MAKING SEVERAL DIFFERENT HEARTS @ KIHYUN USIN MY ARMS AND FINGERS AND SHIT AND HE GAVE FINGER HEARTS AND THREW BIG ARM HEARTS AT ME I ALMOST PASSED THE FUCK OUT • I TURNED AROUND TO SCREAM AT MY FRIEND AND HE WAS LAUGHING AT US AND I CROUCHED DOWN BC I WAS SHY AND DIDNT WANT HIM TO SEE ME SO STUPIDLY EXCITED • i feel like i made a lot of eye contact w shownu and jooheon like idk they couldve been looking at the crowd in general but it felt so personal and directed towards me, the sweaty girl w glasses, a broken lightstick, and a bear phone case so im gonna let my delusional ass believe tht • the hi touch holy fuck the hi touch okay so it was like?? ~20 minutes after the concert ended everyone was chillin in the pit and then monsta mcfreakin x walked out and we all screamed then security lined us up • the order was kihyun, hyungwon, wonho, minhyuk, shownu, jooheon, changkyun * i was praying tht kihyun wouldnt be first so i had time to emotionally prepare but tht didnt work out • so um i. held his hand his grip was pretty firm and i panicked and forgot everything i wanted to say and i was like “marry me” and he laughed and said okay so um BITCH IM ENGAGED TO YOO KIHYUN? his hand was so beautiful okay everyone talks abt kihyuns small ass hands but they were bigger than i imagined and he has some big meaty claws • they were standing on a small platform behind a table so everyone was really tall so high fiving hyungwon was a little hard for my 5'1" body i had to reach for the stars his hand was so bony but it was Large and i said i love u and he smiled i was ready to sink into the ground and lay myself to rest • lets get smth straight wonho is short hes like jus a little taller than kihyun but boy hes Built and he has this cute little smile on his face and his hand was SO SOFT AND SO WARM I WANTED TO CRY i told him i loved him and he said thank u yea haha time to DIE • minhyuk has yaoi hands yall • his hands were so mf gigantic like the hi touch went by fast but holding his hand was so. wow like his hands were really big and warm and i was like i love u!! and he said yea and i laughed jshsgdffjf • SHOWNU IS SO FUCKING BEAUTIFUL IRL PICTURES AND VIDEOS DONT DO HIM JUSTICE??? like he was GLOWING and he has such a large and warm presence and his hands are so warm like i felt like my hand was gonna melt yall i was abt to cry he was smiling so big too and i told him i love him and he jus nodded and said me too snshaudhdfshdhf • jooheons hands were kinda cold but they were so soft and beautiful my legs almost gave out he was so cute and smiley and soft and our fingers tangled weirdly and i was like SORRY and he laughed a bit BUT OHM NYOGD I INTERLOCKED FINGERS WITH LEE JOOHEON AND IT WAS AMAZING • changkyun was last and they were starting to rush the line so i could only high five him and say i loved him :(( he said thank u his voice is really attractive guys and he was such a chill dude i wanna be best friends w him • after the hi touch we were immediately lined up again for the group photo which was a ~15 min wait? • they numbered us off then let us in and immediately ppl are looking for spots in front of them someone took the spot in front of kihyun so i was like okay tell me to die first NDHAHDJFGS but my friend found a spot in front of wonho and minhyuk and i stood next to her in front of minhyuk and shownu • it was so funny my friend stumbled a little in front of minhyuk bc she was walking fast and he was like OH MY GOD OH MY GOD and shownu was laughing • STANDING IN FRONT OF THEM JUS MADE ME REALIZE HOW GORGEOUS THEY ARE LIKE,??,,????? • i turned around to look at minhyuk and shownu and felt a piece of me die and i said hi then turned around covering my face bc i got so fuckin embarrassed theyre so HANDSOME • my friends fave is wonho so she turned around and told him she loved him and held his finger I WAS ABT TO SCREAM • AH as they were putting more ppl in the front and this really tall girl stood in front of me and i was like I Am Five Foot One so as a joke before they took the pic i tippytoed and did peace signs and bunny ears my head just barely peeked over her shoulders and i think shownu and minhyuk and jooheon were laughing behind me i hope they were laughing at me i’ll gladly make a fool of myself for them • luckily the rows after us kneeled down! • after the pic they started shooing everyone off and i yelled KIHYUN I LOVE U GOOD NIGHT i dont think he heard me but oh well • SHOWNU SAID BYE TO ME BEFORE I LEFT AND I SAID BYE BACK I ACTUALLY FELT MY LEGS GIVE A LITTLE and changkyun was waving to everyone hes really cute and calm in person i wish i oculdve talked to him more • we walked out completely dazed like we were jus sitting on a bench outside looking fuckin faded

#monsta x #shownu #wonho #minhyuk #kihyun #hyungwon #jooheon #changkyun #beautiful in la day 1 #this took me several hours bc i had to rewatch videos and then i would rerewatch videos bc i am full of love and sentiment #en speaks

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