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socialdegenerate · 3 years

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Fanfic: Don’t Go Sharing Your Devotion

SO I was googling the irl restaurant that they copied for Joe’s restaurant, and it turns out that it’s one of those places that doesn’t have a menu because the chef makes a specific set of dishes that changes everyday. I love stupid details so of course I immediately stole that (and their opening days/hours) for my own fic.

SK8 the Infinity Kaoru Sakurayashiki x Kojiro Nanjo | Matcha Blossom | JoeCherry SFW 9,154 words

Kojiro didn’t particularly like it when people got absolutely plastered in his restaurant.

Fine wine was meant to be savoured, especially when he put so much time into choosing the right pairings for his food, and tipping it back as quickly as possible should have been saved for convenience store sake. Not to mention, drunks often didn’t appreciate that his restaurant closed at eleven and not a minute later, because Kojiro often had things to do that didn’t involve herding sloshed patrons around like rowdy cats.

But, like always, he made an exception for Kaoru. Sure, Kaoru was smug and annoying and liked running up his electricity bill and never attempted to pay the tab that Kojiro wasn’t actually keeping, but he was also Kojiro’s oldest friend and someone who was never, ever boring.

Plus it was nice to see him actually walking again and not sneaking out of hospital against every-fucking-body’s advice.

“You’re such a lightweight,” Kojiro said as he snagged a glass from the bar and walked out from behind the counter, settling in the stool next to Kaoru’s. Kaoru was slumped against the polished wood, his glasses sitting skewed on his face, but he still managed to pin Kojiro with an unsteady glare.

“I’m normal. S’not my fault you’re a gorilla.”

Kojiro laughed, filling his wine glass with the bottle Kaoru was steadily working his way through — his second — and tipping the last of it into Kaoru’s empty glass. “Bottoms up, Cherry.”

Kaoru hissed something probably entirely unflattering but his hand shot out and reclaimed his wine anyway, half the glass disappearing in a matter of moments. Kojiro raised his eyebrows, sipping from his own glass like a reasonable person, and wondered if Kaoru was drunk enough to want to talk about what was driving him to drink like they were twenty again.

“You know drinking isn’t a competition, right?”

“You only say that ‘cause you’re losing,” Kaoru slurred, lifting his glass again. This time, Kojiro placed a firm hand over his wrist, keeping Kaoru from skolling the last of the wine; Kaoru glared at him and tried to break Kojiro’s grip, but he didn’t stand a chance and so had to return the glass to the countertop.

“What’s got you this drunk on a Wednesday?” It was always a risk to ask Kaoru questions straight out instead of poking at him until he angrily threw out the information Kojiro wanted, but it was getting late and Kaoru didn’t look like he was going to be awake for that much longer.

Thankfully, luck was on Kojiro’s side this time. “I’m mourning, leave me alone.”

“Mourning?” Kojiro asked, a little startled. Kaoru wasn’t acting like someone had died, but his poker face was undeniably good.

“Yes, shut up,” Kaoru said. Rubbing his hands down his face and groaning, he went for his glass again and this time, Kojiro let him. “I’m mourning my wasted teenage years.”

Ah. Kojiro should have guessed that it would have something to do with that bastard, who was going to be damn lucky if he didn’t find himself getting suplexed through a table at his next nationally-televised press conference.

Letting himself bask in a brief revenge fantasy, Kojiro knocked his foot into Kaoru’s leg. “C’mon, we had a lot of fun, didn’t we? It wasn’t a waste, even if he’s a dick now.”

“Not the skating,” Kaoru said, the duh unspoken but heavily implied. “I wasted my first love on a guy who hit me in the face with a skateboard.”

“Oh,” Joe said, the admission hitting him harder than he would ever admit — even if he’d suspected it all along. “It happens?”

“Does it?”

“I mean—”

“I didn’t even know,” Kaoru groaned, finishing off his wine. Kojiro hesitated for a second and then pushed his own glass over, Kaoru accepting it gratefully. “I guess I thought he was cool and handsome but I didn’t even realise I’d liked him until he—”

Kaoru clicked his tongue and mimed Ainosuke swinging his skateboard, almost scattering glasses and bottles as he went. Kojiro leaned back to avoid Kaoru’s flailing arms, wondering if he really wanted to ask his next question, but he supposed that there was still plenty of wine out the back if he didn’t like the answer.

“And are you still in love with him?”

“Who said anything about love?” Kaoru snapped, Kojiro deciding not to point out that Kaoru had. “As if I would be, I think I got over him years ago.”

“So you’re upset because…?”

“Idiot,” Kaoru muttered with absolutely no heat behind it. “I liked a guy, and I never got to do anything about it because I didn’t even know I liked him until like fifteen years later, and now he hates me and I hate him and if I see him again I’m going to run him over and if you try to stop me I’ll run you over too.”

“I see,” said Kojiro, who didn’t actually see at all.

“More wine,” Kaoru demanded suddenly, slapping his hand onto the counter and almost knocking over the glass he’d just finished.

“Uh, I don’t think so.” Gathering the two empty wine bottles and two empty glasses, Kojiro stood up and took them through to the kitchen, placing the bottles in the recycling crate with the other empties and quickly washing off the glasses. He’d already finished cleaning up the rest of the kitchen while Kaoru had been steadily demolishing his first bottle of wine, and so thankfully all he had left to do was turn off the lights and lock up.

By the time he got back to the dining room, Kaoru was sprawled out on the counter and snoring loudly, his hair a complete mess and his mouth hanging open in a way that might have been unattractive to anyone else. To Kojiro, though, he was an unfairly untouchable beauty, even drunk off his ass and utterly dishevelled; or maybe he was beautiful because he looked so unlike either of his usual personas.

“I should get you home,” Kojiro said, although he made no move to do so. He wasn’t angry at Kaoru, of course, but it still hurt to know that Kaoru’s first love had been — frustrated sigh — Ainosuke. Despite all the effort Kojiro had put into getting Kaoru to notice that he wanted to be more than friends, Ainosuke had skated in with his stupid talent and his prestigious family name and his sexy mysterious vibes and had effortlessly captured Kaoru’s attention.

Maybe Kaoru hadn’t noticed what his own feelings had been until now, but Kojiro had guessed all along. He’d never felt like a third wheel, exactly, but he’d always known that it could have been a matter of time until he was. And then Ainosuke had left, and Kaoru had gone quiet(er) for several weeks, and Kojiro had irritated him until he’d come back to his usual self. Seeing how badly Kaoru took the whole thing had been enough for Kojiro to decide that he was never going to forgive Ainosuke; he’d never been entirely sure of Kaoru’s thoughts on the matter, though.

But even after Ainosuke had returned, Kaoru had never again reacted to him the way he had in their youth. Ainosuke had come back almost like a different person entirely, and he’d certainly never shown any interest in picking up where he’d left off with the people he’d left behind. At the very least, it was reassuring to know that Kaoru wasn’t still hoping that Ainosuke was going to turn around and be the kid they’d known years ago.

...Even if it might have taken a skateboard to the face for him to get there.

Wincing at the memory, Kojiro decided that it was probably time to get Kaoru into a real bed before he aggravated any remaining injuries by sleeping on the counter. Flicking off all the lights except for one, he unplugged Carla from the wall and let the power cord retract back into the board. He never really liked handling such an expensive piece of equipment, especially considering that Kaoru would castrate him if he ever damaged his precious skateboard, but there was really nothing for it.

Tucking the board under one arm, Kojiro shook Kaoru awake and lifted him to his feet, ignoring Kaoru’s incoherent mumbling and marching him to the door. Thankfully he lived close to the restaurant, certainly closer than Kaoru did, and he managed to close up the restaurant and get them all home without Kaoru throwing up on him or anything else.

Herding Kaoru into the shower felt like it was going to be more effort than dealing with Kaoru’s bitching in the morning when he woke up feeling grotty, though, and so Kojiro only helped him to kick off his zori before taking him straight to the bedroom and dumping him on the bed. Carla was placed up against the wall, right where Kaoru would see it in the morning, and Joe left a bottle of water on the bedside table to help with Kaoru’s inevitable hangover.

The couch wasn’t exactly comfortable to sleep on, but Kojiro figured that Kaoru deserved the bed for once. He’d gotten drunk enough to loosen his tongue with only a little prompting, after all, and he was obviously upset about the whole thing. It was going to be a long, restless night of trying to sleep and thinking about what Kaoru had told him, but if there was anyone that Kojiro would put up with that for, it was the man drunkenly passed out in his bed.

——————————————————

Kojiro didn’t bother sticking his head out of the kitchen when he heard the restaurant’s front door unlock and open. There was only one other person who had a key to the place, Kojiro having given it to him when he got sick of having to stop what he was doing to let Kaoru in on the nights he stopped by. Listening to the familiar sounds of Kaoru fussing about in his dining room, rearranging the flowers and stealing his electricity and whatever else he liked doing when Kojiro wasn’t watching, Kojiro was looking forward to being able to relax after a busy dinner service.

“The city’ll shut me down if they find out I’ve got pests in my dining room,” Kojiro drawled after he finished up in the kitchen, walking out behind the counter. “Do I need to call an exterminator?”

Kaoru didn’t look up from his phone. “I think the animal that escaped from the zoo who has taken up residence in your kitchen is a bigger concern.”

“I’m the animal? What about you, huh, getting piss-ass drunk on someone else’s booze last week and not even thanking him?”

“Mm-hmm,” Kaoru hummed distractedly, clearly not paying attention anymore. That was probably more annoying than anything he could have said, and so Kojiro leaned over the bar and plucked Kaoru’s custom phone from his hand, slapping his free hand over Kaoru’s mouth so that he couldn’t verbally instruct his AI to lock the device.

“What are you even doing?” Looking down at the screen, Kojiro was surprised to see what was very obviously a dating app open on Kaoru’s screen. “Really?”

Scooting his stool back far enough to escape from Kojiro’s grip, Kaoru glared but obviously resigned himself to the fact that there was no way he was getting that phone back anytime soon. Still, he didn’t verbally instruct Carla to self destruct it or anything, and so Kojiro figured he was in the clear. “If a walking steroid like you can have so many women hanging off you, it shouldn’t be surprising that I might be popular too.”

“Uh, if this is the pick of the bunch, I’d rather not be popular at all,” Kojiro laughed, quickly swiping left past three disappointing profiles in a row. “Although I guess our standards might be a little different.”

“Carla, phone lock,” Kaoru snapped and Kojiro let out a disappointed aw when the screen went black. He tossed the phone back to Kaoru, feeling smug when it was promptly tucked away and he finally had Kaoru’s full attention.

“Why are you online dating anyway? I thought you had a spot.” He’d accompanied Kaoru to his favourite bar a couple of times, mostly when they’d barely been old enough to get in the door and Kaoru had still been intimidated by the idea of going to gay bars, and that had been enough to show him that Kaoru had absolutely no trouble finding men who liked him.

(It had hurt quite a lot the first few times, but he’d quickly come to realise that Kaoru had a bad little habit of never calling them back. That had taken the sting out of knowing that Kaoru was apparently looking at everyone except him.)

“I’m not online dating, idiot,” Kaoru said with a roll of his eyes. “I’m...window shopping.”

“Okay, why are you window shopping? Pretentious bastard.”

Kaoru looked conflicted for a moment, clearly wondering if he was too sober for this conversation, but then he flipped his hair over his shoulder and sighed heavily. “I’m stuck in a rut.”

Kojiro made an encouraging noise, deciding it probably wasn’t the right moment to needle Kaoru like he usually did.

“I don’t know what I want anymore.”

“Does anyone? That’s why I don’t bother trying to choose.”

“I can hardly stand around with four men hanging off my arms like you do, you stupid overgrown gorilla,” Kaoru said, but his heart clearly wasn’t in it.

“Not with those skinny arms, you couldn’t.” Kojiro meant to lean over the bar and lightly smack said skinny arm, but he somehow found himself putting a reassuring hand on Kaoru’s shoulder instead. “We’re still young and pretty, Kaoru. We don’t have to have it all figured out yet.”

Squeezing Kaoru’s shoulder, Kojiro reluctantly pulled his hand back. “Anyway, is this about him again?”

“No,” Kaoru said immediately, but they both knew he was lying. “I just...I was content with the occasional hookup, but now that I’m aware of the absence of something that I didn’t even know I had in the first place, it doesn’t seem like enough anymore.”

“And your answer to that is online dating?”

“I thought it was worth a shot,” Kaoru said, and then he laughed. “You were right about the quality, though; I’d rather date you than any of those men.”

Kojiro hoped his answering laugh didn’t sound too hollow. Even if it did, though, he doubted that Kaoru would notice it any more than he had anything else that had been right in front of him for years. “That’s alright, I’ll spare you from falling in love with me after one of my famous date nights.”

“Infamous, more likely.”

“With all this wit and charm, it’s astounding that men aren’t literally lining up to marry you already.”

“Who says they aren’t? Some of us just have discerning taste.”

If Kojiro were actually interested in genuinely hurting Kaoru, he might have made a joke about Ainosuke being proof of the opposite in response. But for all their poking and prodding and bickering, they were both well aware of where the line was and were sure not to cross it; and so he reached out and messed up Kaoru’s hair.

“C’mon, Cherry, all this teen angst is stinking up my restaurant. Let’s go skate.”

“The old folks will call the police if you go rattling down the road in front of their houses this late at night.” But Kaoru was already standing up and retrieving Carla from the power point, and he had begun to straighten up the dining room when Kojiro ducked into the back to change out of his chef’s uniform.

They hadn’t had a chance to just skate lately, between the stupid tournament and Kaoru’s injury and their real lives, and Kojiro was glad to see the hint of a smile on Kaoru’s face as he skated underneath a streetlight. They didn’t go anywhere in particular, simply enjoying the rush of the night air going past them as they flew down the quiet streets, and Kojiro could already feel the stress of the week melting off him.

Aware that Kaoru wasn’t quite back at 100 percent, Kojiro eventually headed towards a park that he knew didn’t lock its gates, flagging Kaoru down and herding him towards a bench sitting off the paved path they were skating down.

“Ah, that felt good,” Kojiro groaned, dropping onto the bench and hooking his elbows over the back. Kaoru was far more proper when he sat down, his back straight and his hands neatly folded, and of course that made Kojiro want to tease him.

“You don’t have to be such a priss when it’s only me around, you know.”

“And you don’t have to be such a slob, but that hasn’t managed to stop you yet.”

“Be nice or else I’ll post the pictures I took of you passed out on my bar like the drunk tanuki you are,” Kojiro threatened. He was fairly sure that Kaoru knew there weren’t actually any pictures, and also that Kaoru could probably hack into his phone to find out regardless, but he’d never let the truth get in the way of a good jab.

“Try it and your restaurant will have so many one-star reviews that you’ll be closed within a week.”

“Oh, yeah?” Kojiro shot back, rocking sideways into Kaoru and nearly knocking him straight off the bench. When Kaoru tried it back, Kojiro didn’t shift at all, and he laughed too loudly until Kaoru jabbed his bony fingers right under his ribs.

“You bitch,” Kojiro growled, and it felt like they were sixteen again when Kaoru tossed his hair and jumped onto his skateboard.

“Better a bitch than a stupid gorilla,” Kaoru shot back before skating away, Carla’s lights beginning to fade into the distance. Kojiro wasn’t far behind though, a wide grin on his face as he shot through the park in hot pursuit of his friend.

If nothing else, at least he could help take Kaoru’s anxious mind off his troubles for a while longer.

——————————————————

Kojiro had never really considered himself to be a jealous person. Sometimes things hurt, for sure, but he’d never really gone any further than that.

And yet, that knowledge wasn’t making him feel any less irritated every time the young foreign man sitting next to Kaoru touched his arm and said something in a too-loud voice, making Kaoru tip back his head and laugh softly.

It was hardly the first time that Kaoru had brought someone along to his restaurant; in fact, Kojiro took pride in the knowledge that his place was where Kaoru chose when he needed to impress a potential business partner. But those were usually older guys who were too dazzled by a pretty smile to notice that Kaoru’s interest was solely in their money and not their...sparkling personalities.

This time, though, Kaoru was clearly laying it on a little too thick, and it was making Kojiro’s hands shake enough that he was worried about nicking his fingers with the sharp knife he was trying to use. Usually he would never assume that Kaoru, of all people, was out on a date, but his weirdly flirtatious behaviour combined with the conversation the two of them had had the other night meant that Kojiro didn’t think it was a normal business meeting.

And he hated that.

He’d had himself under control for so long. He’d been so happy to get to skate with Kaoru and talk with Kaoru and fight with Kaoru and drink with Kaoru; but the last few weeks had shown him that his teenage feelings had been buried but not forgotten. If he really thought about it, he could probably trace it back to lifting Kaoru’s injured body off the ground and cradling him to protect him from getting jolted around as they drove to the hospital.

Apparently seeing Kaoru get so hurt had awakened something in him, and now Kojiro didn’t know if he could go back again.

But he was a professional, and like always he’d put a lot of thought into choosing his menu for the day, and dammit he was going to go out there and put these plates in front of Kaoru and his noisy foreign date and he was going to smile and pretend that he was happy about it.

Putting the final touches on the two plates, Kojiro stepped out of the kitchen and walked up to Kaoru’s usual spot. As always, he’d offered Kaoru a table, but Kaoru had walked right past him and taken the empty counter instead; now he was sitting there alone, and Kojiro glanced outside to see that guy pacing in front of the restaurant with his phone held to his ear.

“Finally,” Kaoru said when Kojiro placed their plates down, twisting in his stool to shoot Kojiro an annoyed look. “I thought I would die of old age before you got yourself sorted out.”

Kojiro really, really wasn’t in the mood. He wasn’t mad at Kaoru for doing what made him happy, but he was mad at himself for not being able to be happy for Kaoru, and he wasn’t sure if he could trust himself to walk up to their unspoken line and not trample all over it.

“Enjoy,” he said simply, walking away and not looking back when he heard Kaoru say his name. Thankfully his weekend part-timer was around to collect plates and run bills, because Kojiro was content to busy himself with the kitchen and not go anywhere near the counter until he was sure that Kaoru was gone.

The clock ticking towards eleven felt like it was taking days instead of hours, even after Kojiro personally washed all the dishes, planned his menus further in advance than he ever had, and began prep for the next day. He sent his worker home at ten because the dining room was empty, Kaoru having left at some point before then, and proceeded to shut up shop early.

This time, it was his turn to grab a bottle of wine and a spare plate from the kitchen and slump down in one of his chairs. He had to admit, today’s menu had been a real good one and he was actually glad that Kaoru had been around to try it; the circumstances weren’t ideal, but he liked impressing Kaoru even after all these years.

He was most of the way through his plate when he heard the door lock turn, looking up to see Kaoru quietly letting himself in. Despite everything, or maybe because of the couple of glasses of wine running through his system, it made him smile.

Tipping his head towards the bar to encourage Kaoru to grab his own glass, Kojiro quickly finished off his food and sat the plate to the side as Kaoru joined him, filling Kaoru’s glass and topping his own off as well. “If you get drunk, I’m leaving your ugly ass in the alley.”

“You’re back to your usual stupid self, then?”

“Long day, I guess. Not that you’d know, considering you seem to spend half your work days socialising.” It was the closest thing to an apology that Kaoru would accept, and he smiled faintly.

“A gorilla with no social skills probably can’t understand, but it’s a lot of work pretending to be interested in handsy foreigners to separate them from their money.”

“Oh? Didn’t seem like you were pretending too hard. He was better looking than the usual ones.”

“Ugh, so loud,” Kaoru complained, and Kojiro couldn’t help but laugh. “And no understanding of subtlety at all, if I didn’t audibly laugh at his awful jokes he would tell them again.”

“Huh,” Kojiro said, taking a sip of wine and wondering how foolish he was feeling today now that a crushing weight felt like it had been lifted from his shoulders. “Here I thought you actually liked him; but I guess you’re just a sneaky tanuki after all.”

Kaoru stared at him, his head slowly tilting to the side. “I’m stuck in a rut, not hopelessly desperate. Like I said, I’d rather date you than some foolish investor who can’t keep his hands to himself for a single dinner.”

“Keep saying that and I’ll think you mean it,” Kojiro said before he could stop himself.

“I don’t date zoo animals,” Kaoru shot back, a familiar glint in his eye.

“You don’t date anyone, last time I checked. Just admit you’re scared that I’d ruin you for any other guy.”

“Why? Because it would be so bad that I would decide to be straight instead?”

“Oh, the women don’t deserve that,” Kojiro said. His heart was beating like he was about to do an S run, and he was leaning towards Kaoru over the table before he realised he was doing it. “You’re curious, admit it.”

“I’d prefer not to spend my evening spotting you at the gym or whatever it is you make those poor women do.”

“Please, I’ve seen the way you look at me.”

It was a bluff, but Kojiro nearly choked on his spit when Kaoru flushed pink and looked away. Suddenly flustered, he busied himself with his wine glass, glad when Kaoru did the same and they could both pretend it hadn’t happened.

Kaoru was the one to break the unsettled stalemate they’d fallen into, still not quite able to meet Kojiro’s eyes again. “Well, are you paying?”

“Dude, did you not just sell a bunch of your weird shit to another investor?”

“I should have known you’d be a stingy date.”

“So now you want to go on a date with me?” Kojiro asked, not entirely sure how they’d ended up here. He wasn’t complaining, he supposed, but this certainly wasn’t how he’d predicted that this conversation would pan out.

Kaoru shrugged, kicking his foot against the leg of Kojiro’s chair. “I want a free meal that wasn’t cooked by a carbo-loading chef with muscles for brains.”

Kojiro sighed heavily, trying not to sound as excited as he felt. “Well, I can’t have anyone saying that I don’t treat my dates right. Guess I’ll waste my day off with you.”

“Please, it’s an honour.”

“Honour my ass, I’ll be lucky if my good reputation isn’t shattered after people see me with you.”

“What good reputation?” Kaoru drawled, looking so utterly pleased with himself, and Kojiro cracked.

Starting to laugh, he picked up his glass and held it out towards Kaoru, quietly pleased when Kaoru lifted his glass as well. “I’ll pick you up on Tuesday at seven?”

“If you must.” Despite his tone, though, Kaoru tapped his glass against Kojiro’s and drank deeply, watching Kojiro over the top of the glass. “Do you have any desserts left? I didn’t get any earlier because I wanted it to be over.”

“You know where everything is,” Kojiro said, and once Kaoru was out of sight he dropped his head into his hands. He was happy and confused and nervous and—

What the fuck was he doing?

Well, that was a problem for future Kojiro to deal with, he supposed.

——————————————————

Now that future Kojiro was present Kojiro, he still didn’t know what the fuck he was doing and he was rather irritated with past Kojiro. Pacing in a small park area near Kaoru’s studio, he wasn’t sure what on Earth he was going to do about the night ahead of them and it was sending him into a bit of a tailspin.

If he played it seriously, he risked sending Kaoru running the way he did from basically everyone who tried to get close to him. If he played it as a joke, it would more or less be closing the door on Kaoru ever believing that Kojiro actually liked him. At this point, he wasn’t sure which would be worse...or better.

And now he was late, which Kaoru hated.

Kojiro ended up jogging over to Kaoru’s studio, only to find Kaoru leaning against the outside of the building with an unimpressed look on his face. “Did you forget how to tell time?”

“Didn’t realise you were so eager to go out with me,” Kojiro replied, trying to fix his hair without looking like he was fixing his hair. “But you’ve got me all night, so what’s a few minutes here or there?”

The wink was probably overdoing it, and the look on Kaoru’s face showed that he agreed. “Well I hope you made reservations for dinner, because if I have to wait I’m going home.”

Kojiro had actually called in a favour from another restaurant owner he knew, but there was no way he could admit that to Kaoru and keep his self-respect intact. He had his usual spots that he took the women he casually dated, but whether or not this was actually a real date, he wanted it to be a little different than his normal evenings off.

Kaoru had always been an exception for him, and it didn’t look like things were going to change anytime soon.

“Yeah, yeah,” Kojiro said instead of vocalising any of that, and he jerked his thumb over his shoulder. “C’mon, the restaurant’s nearby.”

It was nice to walk along with Kaoru at his side, their usual bickering giving way to brief snatches of conversation as they dodged the after-work foot traffic clogging up the streets. The pair of them drew plenty of attention, as always seemed to happen between Kojiro’s size and Kaoru’s striking hair, but for once Kojiro resisted the urge to throw out his usual flirtatious winks and smiles to the women he caught looking at him.

Now that he was actually with Kaoru, he was becoming less and less willing to play the whole thing off as a joke. He wished he could say he hadn’t expected that, but frankly he would have been lying.

The restaurant they were walking to was a small place that always had a line out the front, and usually even Kojiro would have had to have joined the queue; but he’d helped the owner, an old friend of his, revamp his menu a few months earlier and he’d figured that tonight was as good a time as any to call in the favour.

Kaoru was clearly confused when Kojiro led him into a dead-end alleyway with no shopfronts in sight. Due to the line at the front door, though, Kojiro had been told to let himself in through the side door to avoid pissing off the regular patrons of the place; the chef barely glanced up when the door opened into the kitchen, waving his knife in the direction of the dining room.

“Second table up on the left, Nanjo.”

“Legend,” Kojiro replied gratefully, and he glanced over his shoulder to grin at Kaoru. “VIP entrance and no wait: I pulled out all the stops for you.”

“Hm,” was all Kaoru had to say, but he did seem quietly pleased when they walked out of the kitchen to their table and he neatly folded himself into his chair. Or maybe that was wishful thinking on Kojiro’s part. In either case, Kaoru at least wasn’t looking for the exit to make a quick escape so Kojiro would consider that a win.

Unlike Kojiro’s restaurant, this place actually had a set menu and so Kojiro was free to watch Kaoru as he pored over the choices in front of him. Kojiro nearly choked on his water when he realised that he was thinking about how cute Kaoru looked when he was concentrating; he thought he’d left that behind with his teenage years, but apparently not.

A smarter man might have wondered if he’d gotten himself in too deep.

Kojiro was trying very hard not to be a smarter man.

He hadn’t even opened his own menu when their server came by to take their order, but at least he was able to play that off with minimal problems. He was well-acquainted with Kaoru’s tastes by now, considering that Kaoru had never been shy about his opinions on Kojiro’s food, and so he simply seconded whatever it was that Kaoru ordered. That earned him a raised eyebrow from Kaoru, but Kojiro smiled innocently back at him.

“You seem distracted,” Kaoru stated. “Or has your little brain overheated?”

Not wanting to cause a scene in his friend’s restaurant, Kojiro let that roll off his back and shrugged. “Always a good idea to show that you think your date has good taste.”

“You’re an idiot,” Kaoru said, but he looked a little flustered as he took a sip from his water glass and cleared his throat.

It was hardly the first time they’d gone out to dinner together but the atmosphere felt strangely awkward while they waited for their food to come. Kojiro didn’t want to pick a fight, but there was no way that Kaoru would take his usual date conversation as anything other than Kojiro making fun of him. Even if he actually meant it, his usual flirtations would only get Kaoru’s hackles up and keep him from actually enjoying the meal Kojiro had arranged for him.

Kaoru didn’t seem particularly interested in starting the conversation either, and so it was a relief when their food came and Kojiro could concern himself more with what was going into his mouth than what was coming out of it. The first bite proved that the food was just as delicious as it ever was, and the awkward tension melted when Kaoru’s eyes lit up from the first taste.

“Good, right?” Kojiro said.

“You might not know much, but you do know food,” Kaoru replied. It was as much of a compliment as Kaoru ever gave him, but it hit doubly hard knowing how picky Kaoru was about what he ate and how much pride Kojiro had in his work.

“Keep sweet talking me like that and you might get a second date,” Kojiro said. He busied himself with his own plate instead of watching Kaoru’s reaction to that, not wanting to bring back the awkwardness due to his inability to bite his tongue. The lack of a foot kicking him in the shin was good enough for him, and the rest of the meal passed in relative silence as they savoured the food.

As usual, Kojiro was the first to finish; Kaoru tended to take his time with everything except skateboarding, and Kojiro had to try not to stare too much as Kaoru clearly enjoyed himself. He’d always been beautiful when he was happy, but it was affecting Kojiro so much more after having seen Kaoru look so broken in his hospital bed. The thought had Kojiro swallowing down his familiar anger at Ainosuke, his hand clenching at the thought of what he would have done had Kaoru not needed attention right away, and it was only the feeling of a foot tapping against his own that cleared the fog from his brain.

Kaoru opened his mouth, clearly about to say something about Kojiro’s sudden change of mood, but then he hesitated and slid the dessert menu across to Kojiro instead. “Do you want dessert?”

“Of course I do,” Kojiro said, forcing a smile. It felt less fake by the end, and this time he took the liberty of ordering for the both of them. For all Kaoru’s bluster about making Kojiro treat him, he was too economical to actually let himself splurge even on someone else’s yen; but Kojiro had no such problem, and Kaoru deserved to be treated. An expensive, luxurious dessert was the least of what Kojiro wanted to give him, but it was a start.

After all, he had to prove that Kojiro Nanjo could never be called a stingy date.

——————————————————

Kaoru’s mood seemed to have visibly lifted when they left the restaurant and walked over to the bar Kojiro had picked for after-dinner drinks, to the point where Kojiro actually thought he wasn’t going to run away at the slightest irritation.

That was a win in his book, really.

The bar was quieter than the restaurant had been, with a few small groups dotted around the place and the music at a low enough level to hold a proper conversation, and Kojiro was glad to note that Kaoru actually seemed comfortable there. He’d never really liked the kinds of bars that Kojiro tended to end up in, considering them to be below his standards once they’d aged out of the pursuit of getting as drunk as possible for as cheap as possible, but Kojiro thought Kaoru should understand that sometimes the point was to get out of the bar as quickly as possible (with company, of course).

In any case, this was the kind of place you brought someone you wanted to impress, and Kaoru’s continuing good mood hopefully indicated that Kojiro had made the right choice. It was probably the longest they’d gone without arguing in years, even if they never really meant it, and it was actually kind of nice to hold a regular conversation.

Not that Kojiro would want to give up their usual dynamic, but it helped the night feel like it was actually, well, a real date. It was a dangerous trap to fall into, and dammit Kojiro wasn’t going to be able to help himself if Kaoru kept actually smiling at his jokes.

Eventually they fell into a silence again, but this time it felt more like their usual comfortable atmosphere than the awkwardness of the early evening. When Kojiro excused himself to grab the next round from the bar, he didn’t feel the need to look back over his shoulder to see if Kaoru was sneaking out without him, and he was in a positively good mood when he set their glasses down on the small table between them.

Of course, that was when Kaoru had to go and ruin it.

“Those women were watching you,” Kaoru said, wrapping his long fingers around his glass. Kojiro would like to say that he hadn’t noticed them at all, that he would never be checking other people out while on a date, but he’d registered the table of well-dressed women when he and Kaoru had walked in the door. He wasn’t surprised that they were watching him, considering that he (and Kaoru, even if he didn’t want it) tended to draw attention wherever he went, and yet he wasn’t entirely sure why Kaoru was bringing it up.

“Of course they were,” Kojiro said, intentionally not looking away from Kaoru. Kaoru didn’t meet his eyes, looking down into his glass instead.

“You can go and join them, I won’t keep you here.”

“What?” Joe said, his laugh trailing off when he realised that Kaoru was serious. “Abandoning my date for someone else would be pretty low, Kaoru.”

“Yes, but this isn’t,” Kaoru paused, frustratedly waving his hand between them, “real. You can go, I don’t care.”

And here Kojiro thought they’d actually been having fun. “I don’t want to.”

Kaoru frowned, his index finger tapping erratically against his glass. “You don’t need to pretend for my sake.”

“Kaoru—”

“I know I’m fussy and boring and that you’d much rather be spending your night off with a pretty girl or two hanging off your arms. If you go now, it won’t be a total waste.”

“Okay, now it feels like you’re trying to get rid of me. If you wanna call it a night, let’s just call it a night.”

Kaoru sighed, and Kojiro hated how different this felt to their usual arguments. Normally they’d poke and prod and lose their tempers but it was all in good fun; this felt like there was something more going on below the surface, and Kojiro didn’t like not knowing the rules of the game. He had his suspicions about what had brought this on, of course, but he was hardly going to grill Kaoru about that in the middle of a public bar.

“Don’t worry about it,” Kaoru said, and as if Kojiro could.

“Kaoru—”

“Don’t, Kojiro,” Kaoru said firmly.

Taking the hint, because he wasn’t a total idiot despite what Kaoru liked saying, Kojiro turned the conversation to the new trick he was trying out and Kaoru’s latest technological breakthroughs. That brought Kaoru back out of his shell a little, but he kept glancing over in the direction of the table of women, which made Kojiro frown.

It was obvious that their night, which had been going so well, was quickly coming to an untriumphant end. Kaoru wasn’t biting back with even semi-clever comments despite the obvious openings Kojiro was making for him, and when their drinks were empty Kojiro didn’t bother going back for any more. From the look on his face it was obvious that Kaoru was no longer having fun and so Kojiro wouldn’t further compound his misery.

“You ready to go? I’ll walk you home,” Kojiro said, Kaoru just nodding in reply. This was usually the point where Kojiro would place his hand on the small of his date’s back to lead them out of the bar and into the endless possibilities of the night, hoping that the outcome would be pleasurable for both of them, but Kaoru had withdrawn from him so much that all Kojiro could do was hope to not make it worse.

Kojiro didn’t even spare a glance at the other table when they left the bar, whether or not Kaoru actually noticed. It was true that he actually didn’t care about them, not when he had Kaoru in front of him; but he wasn’t actually surprised that Kaoru didn’t believe him about that. He’d created a certain reputation for himself, after all, and he couldn’t fault Kaoru for believing it.

Kojiro had to wonder why he was even bothering to walk Kaoru back to his house, considering that Kaoru didn’t want to talk to him or even look at him as they made their way back through the darkened streets. But maybe he would figure out some way to wipe that sad look out of Kaoru’s eyes if he thought hard enough, because he didn’t want to be the one to make Kaoru upset.

But nothing was coming to mind, and he could see Kaoru’s house in the distance, and Kaoru seemed to be speeding up with every step.

“Hey, listen,” Kojiro said once they were in front of Kaoru’s house, knowing that this was his last chance to rescue the evening. Kaoru was already going for his keys, barely pausing when Kojiro tried to talk to him. “I had a good night.”

“Hm,” Kaoru said, unlocking the door.

“We should do it again sometime,” he tried, starting to feel a little desperate. Kaoru still wasn’t looking at him, and he would have reached over to hold the door shut if he didn’t think Kaoru would break his kneecap for it.

“I’m tired, Kojiro.”

“Come over for dinner tomorrow?” It wasn’t an invitation that Kaoru actually needed, but it was a clear olive branch that he was extending. Unfortunately, Kaoru didn’t seem inclined to take it.

Glancing back over his shoulder, Kaoru looked worn down. “I don’t know if I’ll have time.”

By then the door was open, and Kaoru was stepping inside. “Goodnight, Kojiro.”

“...Night,” Kojiro said reluctantly, nothing coming to mind that would keep Kaoru out there with him without irritating him further.

And then the door closed in his face, and that was that.

——————————————————

Kojiro made it to the end of the block before he turned on his heel and sprinted back to the door that had just been closed on him. He couldn’t leave things like this, not when Kaoru had been through too many physical and emotional injuries already.

He was fully prepared to knock until Kaoru came out to knock on him, but thankfully Kaoru opened the door before Kojiro had time to irritate the entire neighbourhood with the noise.

“Did you forget something?” Kaoru asked, his face carefully blank.

“I...yeah, I guess I did,” Kojiro asked, rubbing a hand through his hair and trying to sound more confident than he felt. “Look, can I come in?”

Kaoru didn’t answer, but he did open the door wide enough for Kojiro to slip through. He didn’t move beyond the entrance, though, and so Kojiro took the hint to stay by the door and not even bother taking off his shoes. He was inside, at least, so he’d take what he could get and be happy with it.

“What do you—”

“Kaoru, look—”

Talking over each other and then uncomfortably going silent, Kojiro wondered what the fuck it was about Kaoru that made him so damn awkward. It was probably the fact that Kojiro had been on-and-off (mostly on) in love with him since high school, but he’d never struggled so much to just talk to someone.

So if he was going to fuck it all up anyway, he figured that he might as well go for broke.

“Kaoru, you know that Ainosuke was wrong, right?”

Kaoru flinched like he’d been hit (again), but Kojiro pushed forward before he could lose his nerve or start to worry about destroying their friendship like he had so many times before.

“You’re an amazing skater. No one else can do what you do, and you’ve never once been boring. I’d skate with you every day if we had the time, just like we used to do when we were young and dumb.”

“Kojiro—”

“Shh, listen. I know you think I wanted to ditch you for those women tonight, but have I ever done that to you?”

Kaoru narrowed his eyes, clearly not having to think too hard. “Well, there was that time in France…”

“Okay, maybe that once, but—”

“And then the time when we went to that party in Tokyo…”

“Alright, we’re gonna stop this little game right here, it’s not the point.” Kaoru looked slightly less sad than he had when the door had closed between them, though, and so Kojiro couldn’t consider it too much of a slip-up. “I was having fun with you, and I didn’t want the night to end.”

His mouth suddenly dry, Kojiro swallowed hard and shook his hands out. “I always have fun with you so I hate seeing you be so hard on yourself. He’s a dick and you can’t let him throw you off your game, ‘cause you’re better than that. No matter what he said, I...think you’re really great.”

“This is beginning to sound like when you tried to confess to that girl when we were fourteen,” Kaoru laughed a little bitterly, but whatever he saw on Kojiro’s face stopped him in his tracks. “Oh no, this is exactly like that, isn’t it.”

Kojiro winced, and Kaoru slapped his hands over his face. “Oh my god, I’m an idiot.”

“Uh…”

“How do I keep missing these things?” Kaoru said, although it seemed almost like it was more to himself than to Kojiro. “You took me on a date and treated me so well and I hated it because I thought you were trying to tease me!”

“Well, I kind of was. A little bit. I didn’t want you to know because you were always so interested in— uh, well, I’m hot as hell but you never gave me a second look so I kind of let it go,” Kojiro admitted.

“Go back,” Kaoru said, and around his fingers Kojiro could see that his face had gone bright red. “You knew I was in lo— had an interest in Ainosuke?”

“...It was kinda obvious, Kaoru. You stared at him like he was the most stunning thing you’d ever seen.”

Kaoru let out a mortified moan, and Kojiro had to take pity on him. “But I only noticed because I was busy staring at you like you were the most stunning thing I’d ever seen. If it makes you feel any better, he probably never noticed because his head was always too far up his own ass.”

“It doesn’t, thank you.” Finally pulling his hands away from his face, Kaoru looked so tired. “My apparent inability to determine the emotions of myself and everyone around me aside, why are you telling me this now? If it’s pity, I don’t need it.”

“It’s not,” Kojiro blurted out so quickly that Kaoru’s eyebrows shot up. “I liked you so much when we were at school and I figured I was mostly over it by now. But then when you were laying in that hospital bed, right after I would have snapped Ainosuke’s neck for hurting you had you not needed help first, I realised that I was still willing to do anything to make you happy. And then you were online dating and flirting with hot, rich investors in front of me and I guess I got a bit stupid.”

“You brainless gorilla,” Kaoru said, but it was faint and muted.

“If we’re gonna be pointing fingers, you agreed to go out with me tonight and I know you enjoyed it,” Kojiro said. Taking a step forward, he cleared his throat and straightened his shoulders. “So...you’ve heard my story. What’s yours?”

“I don’t know!” Kaoru exploded, but he quickly gathered himself together again with a deep voice. “I don’t know.”

“Ah, I forgot I was dealing with the man who takes fifteen years to figure out his own feelings,” Kojiro said in a light voice, earning himself a glare that didn’t seem entirely angry. “C’mon, let me ask you some questions.”

Reaching out, he took Kaoru’s hands in his own lightly enough that he could escape with minimal effort; after a moment of stiffness, though, Kaoru’s hands relaxed into his own without pulling away. “Did you have fun with me tonight?”

“If you’re trying to feel for my pulse to detect any lies, you should know that those tests don’t actually work,” Kaoru said instead of answering the question. Kojiro raised an eyebrow, but told himself that if he’d wanted things to be easy, he wouldn’t have fallen in love with Kaoru.

When Kojiro failed to take the bait, Kaoru groaned. “Yes, I had fun. With you.”

“Would you do it again?”

“...Maybe.”

That was good enough for Kojiro and he grinned, a new wind pushing him to keep going despite Kaoru’s typical prickliness. The fact that he hadn’t been shoved out into the street was all the answer he needed, really, but this exercise was more for Kaoru than himself anyway. “Do you like skating with me?”

“I miss when we used to skate together all day, every day,” Kaoru admitted, his hands twitching in Kojiro’s. “I suppose it could be worse, skating with you.”

“And if you could wake up every morning next to this face,” Kojiro slapped on his most charming grin and winked, “would you?”

“I—” Kaoru stammered, pulling his hands away from Kojiro and crossing his arms defensively over his chest. “I—”

“You don’t have to answer that one.” Kojiro tucked his hands into his pockets, rocking on his heels and feeling rather proud of himself. The point of the exercise wasn’t necessarily to get Kaoru to admit it out loud, but to get him to admit it to himself. He would have had no issue telling Kojiro that he wasn’t interested, after all, so his hesitation spoke volumes.

“I reckon you’ve got some stuff to think about now, so I’m going to leave you to it,” Kojiro said, not wanting to push Kaoru any further than he already had. As they’d already discovered, Kaoru wasn’t exactly comfortable with emotions, especially if they were his own. “But if you want to come by the restaurant tomorrow, I’m doing a carbonara menu.”

“I...might have time,” Kaoru said. It was as good as a yes, especially compared to Kaoru’s previous answer, and so Kojiro didn’t particularly mind that he was going to have to rework his entire menu to accommodate his sudden decision to play to Kaoru’s favourites.

Kaoru didn’t need to know that, though.

“Well, I only have one more question for you,” Kojiro said, feeling uncharacteristically nervous. He was hardly a blushing virgin type, but this was Kaoru. The forbidden fruit that was suddenly feeling a whole lot less forbidden.

“And?” Kaoru prodded, his posture shifting to something a little less defensive.

Kojiro licked his dry lips, forcing his face into a solemn expression. “It’s the most important one.”

“If you don’t hurry up—”

“And you have to answer honestly, okay?”

“Is that the question?”

“What?” Kojiro asked, and if he wasn’t feeling so warm inside he might have been irritated by how easily Kaoru was tugging control away from him. “No, that’s not the question, smartass.”

Taking another step forward, right up to the edge of the entrance where Kaoru was standing on the slightly raised floor of the actual house, Kojiro tilted his chin up in challenge. “Can I kiss you?”

“Oh, you irritating fuck—” Kaoru snapped, and then his hands were slipping into Kojiro’s hair to bring their lips together for the first time.

Kojiro’s hands gravitated towards Kaoru’s slim waist and he kept them there, despite wanting to take the chance to touch Kaoru all over. Kaoru was more assertive than Kojiro had thought (fantasised) that he would be, and he didn’t hesitate when Kojiro’s tongue slipped into his mouth.

Kissing Kaoru made Kojiro feel like he could never go back again, and yet that just made him want it more. But he wanted to make Kaoru really engage with his own feelings without confusing the whole thing with anything more physical than kissing, and so Kojiro managed to eventually pull back, planting a few quick pecks on Kaoru’s lips before stepping away entirely.

“As much as I’d love to see where this is going, I think we should call it a night.”

“I agree,” Kaoru said, sounding vaguely winded. “I...need to think.”

“Like I said, you should swing by for dinner tomorrow. If you’re not ready to talk, I won’t push.” Kojiro figured he as good as had the answer to his horrifically mangled confession already, but the last thing he wanted to do was make Kaoru uncomfortable at this late stage of the game.

Turning around to open the front door, Kojiro looked back over his shoulder at the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen, his heart pounding when Kaoru met his grin with a smaller one of his own. “Have a good night, Kaoru.”

Kaoru nodded and turned away, walking further into the house as Kojiro left. Right before he closed the door behind himself, though, Kojiro heard Kaoru’s voice calling back to him.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Kojiro.”

#SK8 the Infinity #Matchablossom #Matcha Blossom #joecherry #Kaoru Sakurayashiki #Kojiro Nanjo #Fanfic #SK8 #jesus christ where did all these fuckin words come from

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