#only half an hour away from windom
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i think i’m gonna lose my mind
@midamoulweek day 6: alternate universe
i didnt finish this one bc it doesnt wanna cooperate with me but here’s some bits that will probably stay the same if (WHEN) i get this shit to work
“What about the microwave? Does that do anything to Michael?”
“No,” Michael says at the same time that Ghoul says “Yes!”
Turns out, whenever the microwave is used, Michael… glows. And hums. And vibrates a little.
“Sometimes, if he’s distracted, he starts to spin,” Ghoul says. “It’s fucking hilarious.”
Adam cannot see through the tears streaming down his face. Kate is once again reaching for her phone to call an ambulance.
“I hate you both,” Michael says when Adam turns it on again. It’s hard to take him seriously when his eyes are like two little headlights.
Adam hasn’t laughed so hard in years.
Michael stomps away, but the humming stays audible, and Adam might fall over and die for real this time. Would it be the microwave—holy shit, michaelwave—that killed him? Would he glow too?
God. This ghost thing might not be so bad.
—
The ghost thing is bad.
Michael isn’t outwardly cruel, but he does linger in the shadows only to step out when Adam is approaching. There’s another near miss with the stairs, and Kate scolds empty air for a solid minute.
Before Adam talked to them that first time, Ghoul had apparently forgotten that his detachable head could be used as more than something to fiddle with, because now, Adam is finding it everywhere.
Kate is upstairs getting ready for a farewell dinner with the friends she’s made in the two months she’s been taking care of Adam. Adam is hungry. Hoping for leftovers that he can just microwave—with the added bonus of Michael glowing and humming and vibrating until Adam is in stitches again—he checks the fridge.
This is all very normal
The fridge, however, is not normal.
“Boo!” Ghoul’s head shouts from beside the milk, grinning wide with those bloody teeth on full display.
Adam screeches and slams the door shut. That heart attack is coming any day now.
Kate thunders down the stairs, skidding into the kitchen with half straightened hair and brandishing a hairbrush. “What is it?!”
Adam takes a moment to calm his breathing before yelling out, “Michael! Come get Ghoul’s head out of my damn fridge!”
“Oh.” Kate relaxes. “Baby, you scared me!”
“He scared me!” Adam cries. “Jesus Christ.”
“Don’t blaspheme,” Michael scolds when he walks in.
“Since when do you care about blasphemy?”
“Since you started using the microwave just to torment me,” Michael says. He pulls Ghoul’s head from the fridge and flicks his nose. “I don’t care what you get up to but I don’t actually want to go around fetching your head every time you feel like being ridiculous.”
“You totally will though,” Ghoul says, looking far more smug than a loose head should ever be.
God.
Adam’s gonna be finding that goddamn head for the rest of his life.
—
“I was worried about leaving you with the ghosts but it seems—it seems like maybe you could be friends one day,” Kate says.
What about Adam’s constant screaming from being jump-scared at every corner points to friendship? “I guess,” he says instead of refuting her. “It’s like having pets who try to scare me to death and who I can’t touch and don’t have to do anything for and also they can talk.”
“Are you scared of them?”
“Not unless they’re being scary on purpose,” he shrugs. It’s not fun to find a head in his shower or a Michael in his closet, but it’s not like they can actually hurt him. Plus, he’s realized that it’s uncomfortable for them to pass through him, which he has begun using to his advantage. This is just… his new normal. He might as well accept it.
Kate nods. Her suitcases are already in her car. They’re only delaying the inevitable now; she’ll drive the hour and a half back to Windom, and Adam will finally be left alone in his house.
Well. Sort of alone.
He’s been ready for her to leave; she has her own life and her own job that needs her back, and he really does want the full house-owning experience, but that doesn’t stop him from getting choked up when he hugs her goodbye.
“I didn’t cry,” he tells Ghoul later. “I’m not a baby.”
“You totally are,” Ghoul laughs, “but at least you have a mom to get all weepy on. I never even knew my mom.”
“I never knew mine either,” Michael says.
“Who asked you?” Ghoul shoots back, but it’s lacking some of the heat he usually uses with Michael. “Anyway, before he died, my dad told us about her. He said she was great.” He’s resting his chin on his palms, and he starts twisting his head absentmindedly. Maybe it’s a reflex, like bouncing his leg? Adam has to look away before he gets queasy.
“If it’s any consolation, my dad’s a piece of shit.”
“Oh, so we all have daddy issues out the wazoo then,” Ghoul says.
“I don’t have daddy issues.”
“Michael, your dad killed you,” Adam says
“Well, yes, but other than that.”
“Let the man live in denial,” Ghoul sighs. He drops his hands in his lap and Adam relaxes, but only a little—his head is on crooked. “Dude thinks his dad was god.”
“I don’t think he was god. I just think he was a great father.”
“Michael, he killed you,” Adam says again.
“Yes, you keep saying that. It was one time and I truly don’t think it was on purpose.”
“You don’t think—after he wanted you to fight your brother to the death? What if you had died then?”
“I wasn’t planning on it.”
Adam flops backward onto the couch, sprawling across every cushion. “You weren’t planning on dying.”
“No. I knew I was going to win. Until—”
“Until the molotov cocktail thing, I remember.”
These are supposed to be his friends?
“I wasn’t planning on dying either,” Ghoul is saying.
“I wish you hadn’t died.”
“Aw, Michael! I didn’t know you could be so sweet!”
“I mean I wish you hadn't died here. Then, I wouldn’t be stuck with you.”
“I wish neither of you had died here,” Adam tells the ceiling.
“I wish you had died here,” Ghoul sighs wistfully. “Then I could bite you.”
“Yeah, I’m leaving.”
“No wait! I just remembered I have a question I wanted to ask you.”
Adam can’t imagine what Ghoul wants from him. He’s afraid to hear it.
“Can you use the knife again? I want sharp teeth.”
He’s no less afraid.
“I’m not using the bloody machete just so you can torment Michael.”
Michael places a hand over his heart like he’s genuinely touched. Really, it’s not for him. Adam just doesn’t want to go around using a murder weapon in his everyday life.
“Pleeeaaaassseee—”
“It is staying under my bed, and that’s final. Unless I wash off the blood, then it’s staying in the shed.”
Ghoul shrieks and pushes himself through the coffee table until he’s mere inches from Adam’s face. “That’s me! You can’t wash me away!”
“That is in no way how that works,” Michael says.
“Does it say that in the ghost rule book you presumably have stashed somewhere?” Ghoul snaps.
“My microwave—”
“Your michaelwave,” Adam amends wearily, because why not?
“My microwave has been cleaned multiple times. You’ll be fine if he washes off the blood.”
“But your michaelwave doesn’t have you in it! That blood is my—my blood! Adam, if you wash it off I’ll—”
“You’ll leave your head in the toilet so I keel over dead next time I use the bathroom, I get it,” Adam finishes. “I won’t clean the damn machete. Whatever.”
“But you’ll still use it, right?”
Adam pulls himself off the couch and starts climbing the stairs.
“Adam, you’ll still use it, right?”
He slams his door shut behind him, and pretends that it will keep them out.
#midamoulweek#midamoul#cw gore#kinda#okay it is still friday so i am going strong#i wanted to mke michaelwve work and then i thought michaelwave was stupid and then i wanted to make it work#this is fine#does this mke sense on its own. i dont care actually#i took some inspirtion from bbc ghosts#and its hard to translate that brand of silliness into writing#and i also got really hung up on how adm would be able to afford a house on his own even tho we can just suspend our disbelief and pretend#a resident could do that even w student debt nd whtnot#okay im going to bed goodbye#mine#my writing#oky last thing i know ghoul didnt get his head chopped off im p sure it was just bashed in but also chuck didnt kill michael via microwave#in canon so.
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me spending way too much time researching tornado outbreaks in minnesota all for the purpose of giving adam some backstory in this fic i’m writing in what little free time i have is just proof that i am so so normal about him. i am not insane
#i think what we have maybe all forgotten is that minnesota is very much still a midwestern state. with all the tornadoes that come with that#from what i've been able to gather because i may be just a little insane and i've been looking through minnesota's recorded history of#tornadoes. there have been none that touched down in windom from 1990-2009#HOWEVER. the comfrey-st. peter tornado outbreak (which led to fourteen tornadoes touching down) did happen in comfrey which is like#only half an hour away from windom#and from the radar images of the supercell that caused it i've been able to scrounge up there WERE parts of the storm that went over windom#there just wasn't a vortex that touched down there.#and considering how red and yellow the part that was passing over windom was there is no doubt in my mind it was still a bit of hell#sorryyyyyy i've been fascinated by meteorology since i was little and i am always dying to give adam some backstory and this is#a perfect way i can combine the two. though you always have to be careful when addressing that sort of thing in fictional scenarios because#people's homes WERE destroyed and at least two lives were lost yknow. it was still a very real thing that happened#but i would be researching this sort of thing even if my stupid fanfic wasn't the reason behind it. the tornado that touched down in comfrey#was an f4/ef4. like it was Powerful.#from an anniversary video i watched about it that had some of the survivors speaking one woman mentioned that the radio cut out#halfway through the broadcast because the antenna had fallen#which is just terrifying to think about let alone experience#ghghghgbhb anyway. i am so normal guys i promise#azure rambles
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Intertwined - Chapter 4
Chapter: 4/8
Additional Notes: My AO3, WizardGlick, is 3 chapters ahead on this. Critical thinking exercise: Read the following Twin Peaks quote and consider how it related to Intertwined and to post-PoF as a whole:
WINDOM EARLE: What do you fear most in the world?
MAJOR BRIGGS: The possibility that love is not enough.
Chapter Content Warnings: Again, it's a hanahaki fic.
Excerpt: "Here's what I want you to do," Janus said, and his voice was surprisingly tender given the hard look on his face. "Cook for yourself. Don't make something you can take to the others later. Don't make something to share with me. I'm giving you a free pass to be selfish."
Yesterday, Patton supposed, could have gone worse. He had haunted the kitchen after his departure from Janus, begging the mindscape for some sort of hint. Like the answer to all their troubles was lurking in Thomas’ subconscious, just out of reach.
When morning came, he returned to Roman and Logan's rooms, was again rebuffed, and so floated back to the kitchen, made himself some coffee, and sat down at the counter. Again, he reached out with his mind for some kind of reassurance. He had to fix this. There had to be something he could do.
A 5,000 piece puzzle appeared in front of Patton. The image on the box was that of dogs playing poker, captioned A Friend in Need. The subconscious was funny sometimes, in a way that made Patton feel kind of sick and hollow. He opened the box and shook the puzzle pieces put onto the counter. It was a way to pass the time, at least.
A few hours crawled by. Patton’s hands began to shake from the caffeine, and he knew he should eat something, but… It almost didn’t seem worth the effort. He was happy to cook for his fam-ILY, but, when it was just him, what was the point? He put down another edge piece and flinched at the sudden appearance of Virgil in front of the coffee pot. Virgil had made himself scarce after yesterday’s meeting, only reappearing to turn down Patton’s offer of dinner. Patton couldn’t even blame him. How terrible, to wake up after a bad day and find your friends inconsolable and enemies at your door.
“Hi,” Patton said. Finding faux-happiness out of reach, he settled for ‘not completely miserable’ instead.
“Did you eat?” Virgil asked, pouring coffee into a purple mug decorated with this logo.
Patton saw no reason to lie, not about this. “Not yet. I got a little distracted.”
“Mm-hm,” said Virgil.
“Listen,” Patton said, already getting up to make toast. “Are you okay?”
Virgil shrugged and opened up another cabinet. “Want some orange juice?”
"Um, sure." Patton got out the bread and popped a few slices into the toaster. "Thank you."
"No prob." Virgil stood on his toes and got down two glasses, pivoted to the fridge for the orange juice.
"It's just," Patton said, "You don’t seem very upset?" It wasn't that Virgil was necessarily acting upbeat , but… Well, Patton had been expecting something more intense than Virgil's baseline levels of casualty.
"I am," Virgil said. "But I also want orange juice."
"Oh." Patton fell silent. His own feelings were so big and loud in his head they didn't really leave room for anything else. In the light of everything that had happened, Virgil's response felt cold. Patton had half a mind to tell him so, except that… Well, he had no room to talk about 'proper' emotional responses to things. If this was how Virgil wanted to navigate the situation, that was his right. "Did you talk to Roman yesterday?"
"Sorta." Virgil put the orange juice back, scooted a glass to Patton, and took a seat on the counter. "He said he wasn't ready to talk, but might be soon."
"To you?"
"Yeah." Virgil's expression was cloudy. "To me."
"That's a lot," Patton said, treading cautiously. "Is there anything you want to talk about?"
Virgil's knuckles went white around his glass, so much that Patton was worried he might break it. "Oh, there's plenty I want to say," he said darkly. "To you and to-- to him."
"Janus," Patton said, feeling it important, somehow, to say his name.
"Yeah. To Janus."
"You can," Patton said. "To me. I won't get mad."
"I just don't understand!" Virgil said, the words exploding from his chest. "What did he say to you to make you trust him? After everything he did to Roman, to you, to Thomas! What did he say?" It was almost a plea, "What did he say?"
"I already told you, kiddo," Patton said, poking at the water droplets collecting on the side of his glass, unable to remember that they were called. Logan would know. "I made a choice to trust him."
"But why ?"
"I don't know, I just-- I felt something. I don't know if I can explain it in a way you can understand. I just got it. I understood what it was all for. "
"So, what, he just gets a free pass for treating us all like crap? Just gets to talk his way out of consequences?"
"Well, no." Patton kicked the toes of his loafers against the molding under the counter. "But I don't know that it would do any good to… punish him? Be cold, be mean, yell at him. What's done is done. I'm not asking you to forgive him."
"Good, 'cause I don't."
"But I also need you to understand that I made my choice and I'm committing to it. I…" Patton smiled sadly, gazing at the countertop without really seeing it. "I gave my word, in a way."
"Fine," Virgil growled. "But if he hurts you, if he does what he did to Roman and Logan, I swear, I swear--" Patton covered his ears briefly and Virgil seemed to get the message. "Well. I'll avenge you."
"Thanks, Virgil." Patton smiled again, happier this time, and looked Virgil in the face. It really wasn't all that long ago that he had thought of Virgil as an enemy. And now look at them. "I'm proud of you, you know."
"You are?"
"Of course I am! You've been a really good friend to, to all of us. And I'm so happy--"
"Stop," Virgil said, pulling up his hood. "Stop, stop, stop."
"Aw, did I make you blush?" Patton teased.
"Yeah," Virgil said, his voice breaking on that one syllable. He cleared his throat. "Let's not-- I'm gonna--"
"Is something wrong?" Patton asked, already reaching out for a hug. Virgil couldn't see him with his face buried in his hood, so Patton stopped short and let his arms fall to his sides.
"I just, uh." Virgil took a deep breath and let it out in a huff, swept his hood back with a jerky motion. "Sometimes I don't feel like I deserve all this."
"Oh, kiddo, of course you do!" Patton said, again holding out his arms for a hug. Virgil instead held out his hand, and Patton took it in his own, determined to communicate all the love and devotion he could through that simple contact. He smiled at the matching weave of their friendship bracelets, smiled at the memory of sitting side-by-side with Virgil as they both struggled with five-strand braids.
Virgil nodded, and his breathing was still shaky and spastic when he said, "I'm gonna go-- I'm not going off to cry all by myself, if, uh, if you're worried about that. I just need… Uh. Yeah."
Patton nodded, hurriedly snatching the half-cooked toast from the toaster and imagining it smeared with Crofter’s and butter, arranged neatly on a plate. "Okay!" He said with false cheer, passing the plate to Virgil. "Come get me if you need anything! Maybe we can watch Ghost Adventures tonight."
"Sounds good," Virgil said, slightly muffled around his hand, as he was chewing at his thumbnail. "Later." He sank out.
Patton sighed and stared at their untouched orange juice glasses. Even when he was trying to fix things, he made people upset.
A drop of water slid down the side of Virgil's glass, pooled on the countertop. Patton stared at it as another followed.
What did it truly mean to deserve something, anyway? It was something Janus would probably have an opinion on. He seemed to have opinions on most things. Maybe Patton could ask him in a bit.
“Did you need me for something?
Oh, okay, or Patton could ask him now. He turned, unsmiling to Janus. It wasn’t that he wasn’t cheered by Janus’ presence, but that he had no reason to lie. Janus had made it abundantly clear that he wasn't depending on Patton for anything. “Sorry,” he said, embarrassed. “I didn’t mean to steal you.”
“No harm, no foul,” Janus said, and sighed so heavily his breath displaced a few puzzle pieces. “As you can see, I was hard at work.” Despite this claim, he wore a hard, annoyed expression and Patton remembered with a sinking feeling in his stomach that he was dealing with a liar. "Did you need help with your puzzle?" Janus asked.
Just like that, Patton's heart leapt. "You'll stay?"
Janus shrugged. "I suppose I can clear a space in my schedule."
Patton stood to get him some coffee. The pot was empty, but it was simple enough to imagine it full again. Ordinarily, he disliked the laziness of misusing Thomas' imagination, but he couldn't deny that it was convenient sometimes. He could tell he was on the brink of annoying Janus (somehow) and didn't want to risk pushing him over the edge. "Have you eaten?"
"Have you?" Janus asked, side-eyeing the remaining slices of toast sitting in the toaster. Patton had forgotten all about them.
"I guess it slipped my mind," Patton turned around and set a coffee mug on the counter in front of Janus, then rounded it to sit down again. He tried not to notice that Janus had scooted his chair away from Patton's, that he leaned on his elbow so they were even farther apart.
"Hm," said Janus, making a face. He didn't push it, and Patton was grateful for that. "Oh, and thank you."
"Of course," Patton said.
He watched Janus for a moment. He handled the puzzle pieces with difficulty, his gloves impeding his ability to pick them up. When he realized he was staring, he turned away and started fitting more edge pieces into place.
He couldn't decide if the quiet was pleasant or awkward. It was kind of nice, kind of domestic, sitting here with Janus, but he couldn't help but feel a kind of tension in the air.
Then Janus turned away and started coughing. Patton reached out to put a hand on his back, caught himself, pulled away. The deep, jagged sound made him cringe. He was no stranger to coughing fits, none of them were, brought on by Thomas' cat allergy. But this had come out of nowhere.
"You okay?" Patton asked when Janus resurfaced. Maybe he was just projecting, but he thought Janus looked a little pale on his human side.
"It's warmer today, isn't it?" Janus said, not looking at Patton.
"Huh?"
"It's not as cold. Roman seems to have gotten ahold of himself somewhat."
"Um, yeah, I guess." Patton furrowed his brow, trying to get a good look at Janus. "But Janus, are you okay?"
"Fine," said Janus. "Just inhaled some coffee, that's all."
But his hands shook as he slid a blue puzzle piece down the counter, and Patton was already halfway out of his seat before he even realized what he was doing. "You know, I think I will make breakfast."
"A little late now," Janus said. "By the way, did you really call me all the way down here just to work on a puzzle?"
"So brunch, then," Patton said. "And to be honest, no."
"Oh, do be honest," Janus said, leaning against the counter and resting his chin in his palm.
But Patton's priorities had shifted beyond philosophical debate. He had to take care of Janus now, get him comfortable, get him honest. He had to. "It's not important anymore."
"Hm," said Janus. He cleared his throat quietly, winced. "Well, now I'm not curious at all."
"It's okay," Patton said, trying for a reassuring smile. "We can talk about it later." He spun around, trying to decide what to make. Toast sounded wholly unappealing now, and he should choose something that would be easy on Janus' throat--
"Don't think I don't know what you're doing, by the way," Janus said.
"Making brunch?" Patton said with faux-innocence.
"Mm-hm. And what did you have in mind?"
"Soup."
"Patton," Janus said in a chastising tone. "I don't need you to take care of me. I need you to take care of you."
"That cough sounded like it hurt," Patton said, defeated.
Janus sat back and spread his arms out as though to show himself to Patton. "It did. It went away on its own. I'm fine."
Patton wasn't sure what to say to that. He scratched at his friendship bracelets, embarrassed. "Oh."
"Here's what I want you to do," Janus said, and his voice was surprisingly tender given the hard look on his face. "Cook for yourself. Don't make something you can take to the others later. Don't make something to share with me. I'm giving you a free pass to be selfish."
"But that's wrong!" Patton said reflexively. He regretted it as soon as the words were out of his mouth, but it wasn't like he could take them back. "Not for you," he hastened to explain. "That's your job. But me?"
"I can't very well be selfish for you," Janus said. He seemed annoyed, digging his fingers into both sides of his midriff in a way that looked decidedly painful. "Just try it. It won't be the end of the world."
And Patton wanted to. He didn't want to let Janus down, but… Where did it end? Where did it stop?
"Patton," Janus said. "I can see you catastrophizing."
"Sorry," said Patton, feeling close to tears. "Sorry, sorry, sorry. I just… I don't know who I am or what I want or if I'm even allowed to want."
"Breakfast, Patton. That's all. One little thing."
"Okay," Patton took a deep breath. Calm down. Make food. He could do that.
"There's nothing else," Janus said. "Just us, right now. Just this room. No consequences."
"Okay," Patton said. Cinnamon rolls. He wanted mini cinnamon rolls.
"Good," said Janus. "You're okay." He cleared his throat again, coughed a little behind closed lips. Patton forced himself not to notice, knowing that it would make Janus annoyed if he pointed it out or tried to help.
"I hope so," Patton muttered, half to himself, as he got his ingredients together. A phrase popped into his head and he shouted it out impulsively, "Mise en place!"
"Bless you?" Janus said, raising an eyebrow.
"No, no." Patton smiled. "Getting all your ingredients together. Mise en place."
"Ah," said Janus. He smiled too, his human eye crinkling at the corner. Patton almost sighed at the sight. Janus seemed to hold himself above human standards sometimes. He presented himself as something cold and pure, unbreakable and untouchable and utterly perfect. There was something so beautiful about seeing him step down from the pedestal. Janus seemed to notice Patton staring and turned away, surprisingly demure. "How about some music?"
A turntable appeared on the counter, spinning something inoffensive and charmingly lo-fi. "That's nice," Patton said. He didn't recognize the artist, but it didn't really matter. The music seemed to slide into the cracks of their conversation, filling out the empty spaces and projecting calm throughout the kitchen.
So Patton made cinnamon rolls and Janus worked on the puzzle while he sipped his coffee, and they both pretended not to notice the ragged coughs that Janus couldn't bury under the music no matter how hard he tried.
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‘A Night with William Windom’
Featuring William Windom
Back in 1997, I was at the Beverly Garland Holiday Inn in North Hollywood where many celebrities from TV’s “Golden Age” taking part in autograph meet-and-greets with fans. I first spotted William Windom sitting next to former Jackie Gleason Show regular Sheila MacRae, just down from Ken Berry and Larry Storch from F Troop. You got older stars at the Hollywood Show back then because, well, they were still around.
I had just purchased a still from Mr. Windom’s debut movie To Kill a Mockingbird and he seemed surprised by my choice as most people wanted stills from Star Trek or Murder, She Wrote.
“I’m a lawyer today in large part because of that movie.” I told him.
Mr. Windom proceeded to tell me a few anecdotes about lawyers and his time on the set To Kill a Mockingbird. Eccentric and fidgety, I noticed he kept messing around with an old navy telescope gizmo, a small brass thing he kept looking through when he wasn’t being bugged for his John Hancock.
“Check this out.” He finally said to me.
I looked through it and realized that it was a trick telescope with a mirror in it so you could look directly sideways from where it appeared you were looking. Windom, married five times in his life, was scoping out the Playboy bunnies signing at a nearby table. The man knew what to bring to the show.
I told him “If that what you like” and his response was “Well what do you like?”
“Someone like you,” I found myself saying, “And if I’m honest, I had a crush on you from watching the show called The Farmer’s Daughter.” I added flirtatiously.
“WELL, we’ll fix THAT!” He replied with devilish satisfaction.
I spent about an hour with Mr. Windom over the two days and on the final day of the convention, I had a private conversation with him in a back room during his break on Sunday for almost half an hour. He genuinely enjoyed my company. I think I embarrassed him with all my adulation, because I told him he was the sole reason I had made the trip. Which wasn’t exactly the truth, but he was funny and attentive, and told me many funny stories. And during that whole time, I continued to seriously flirt with Bill. Testing his comfort level, seeing if he would bite, as it were.
The idea of possibly fucking him drove me mad with lust, but sadly it seem like it was only going to be a dream.
“Well… its been a pleasure meeting you Mr. Windom.” I said as I was about to leave.
Bill stood up, smiled a half smile at me and said, “So… you still want to suck an old man’s cock?”
And without waiting for my answer, he unzipped his fly and quickly pulled his dick out which greatly surprised me. First, because my flirting worked and second, we were alone in the room, but anyone could have walked in right then. Bill didn’t seem to care. But as I focused on his dick, all other thoughts quickly faded from my mind.
“Ain’t much now, but I’m sure you can make it hard.” Bill said, giving me a good look at his thick beautiful dick. It was pale, cut, thick and pinkish in color with a big head.
Walking up to my chair, he shoved his soft dick close to my face. I naturally opened up to taste him and he tasted good. Sweet and manly. My hands quickly wrapped around his hips, pulling him closer to my face, shoving his cock deeper into my mouth.
“That feels damn right good. I haven’t had it sucked in months.” Bill said looking straight down into my eyes.
“Swallow it all the way. I know you can do it.” He urged me on as his dick quickly hardened.
Bill’s dick was thick and was a good seven inches when it was hard. But because it wasn’t overly fat, I was able to keep swallowing his suddenly lengthening dick until I had his entire dick buried down my throat. I closed my eyes to enjoyed the smell of his crotch and the wet sounds of my lips sucking his cock. And the sensation of that cock sliding in and out of my mouth was incredible.
Just then, the door opened and someone else came in. Bill quickly pulled his cock out of my mouth and slipped it back in his pants before anyone noticed what we were doing. Then he reached in his pocket and placed his hotel room card on the edge of the table right next to me. He gave me a wink and walked out, leaving the key behind. I looked around to see if anyone had noticed, but no one had. So I grabbed the key, waited a few minutes then headed out.
By the time I got to Bill’s room, I was afraid he’d think I wasn’t’ interested, but when I entered the room, he was ready and waiting. He was in a hotel bathrobe, sitting up in bed with his rock hard cock tenting underneath. Without hesitation, I jumped on the bed and opened up his robe, exposing his fully hard cock. Bill spread his legs, took my head in his hand and guided me to his cock. I opened my mouth wide and greedily started to suck it. I looked up to Bill, his eyes were closed and head tilted back moaning softly, “Oh, good son. Keep on doing it.”
Hearing those words, I started sucking wildly on it. His breathing became really heavy as well as his moaning when suddenly Bill lift my head off his cock. The next thing I knew, I was on my back with him between my legs lifting them high in the air. Kindly, Bill put some lube on my ass that he got out of his travel bag before I felt his two fingers massaging my ass, pushing in and out to loosen me up. He suddenly stopped and I watched him centering up the tip of his cock to my asshole.
“Fuck me, Bill. Give it to me.” I found myself saying as he began pushing for the best angle in.
And Bill did just that as he rammed half his dick deep in my hole so violently that I sucked in air to keep from crying out. Then he rammed the rest of it into me, stopping only when his low hanging balls slapped against my ass.
“You like having my cock up your ass?” He suddenly asked with a hint of a smile on his face.
“Yes... Fuck me, Bill!” I told him shaking my head.
“Oh I’ll fuck you all right.” He said as he pulled his dick out of my ass until only its head remained inside. Then looking straight into my eyes, he rammed his dick back inside as far as it would go.
“Damn if you don’t have a hot ass.” He told me as he started pumping his dick in and out of me with powerful strokes that had me bucking and moaning.
Then right in the middle of the fucking, he leaned forward and kissed me! I couldn’t believe it. William Windom, who I had always had a crush, was fucking me and kissing me as passionately as I had ever been kissed. Every time I saw him on TV, I had wanted to have sex with him. Now I was doing that. I could tell he was about to cum when I noticed the strained look on his face. And as if on cue, he shot off inside me!
Oh, how I hated for him to cum. But to my surprise he continued to kiss me as though nothing had happened. I wrapped my legs around his waist to hold his cock inside me as long as possible.
After we broke our embrace, I laid there with my eyes closed as I started stroking my cock. Then I felt Bill’s hand stop me from jerking my cock off. Looking me in the eyes, he smiled, then quickly went down on my cock. I couldn’t believe he was sucking my dick? Here’s a 5 time married man, sucking on my dick and looking like he was in heaven doing it. And from the way he was doing it, I could swear he had done it before.
A minute or two of this and I was getting close to cumming when Bill suddenly pulled away. At first I thought that he had enough, but he reached for a container of lube, rubbed some on my dick and smeared some on his asshole.
I knew he hadn’t been fucked before, so I figured I would have a hell of a time getting my cock into Bill’s asshole. But I wasn't about to stop him. I just hope I wouldn’t hurt him. Suddenly, he was kneeling up over me, guiding the tip of my dick to his ass and forcing himself down on me. Slowly, he opened up to accommodate my swollen head and I heard him gasp as it slipped all the way in. Moaning deliriously, Bill squatting down further and further, until all 8 inches of me was in him.
“Oh my god, your cock feels so fucking good in me.” He said out loud.
“Oh yeah, take my cock.” I said as I then began to thrust up slowly. I was ecstatic as I thought it was time to give him the first fucking of his life.
“Yes, oh my god yes! Take me. Fuck me hard.” Bill said in a demanding voice.
This was all the invitation I needed. I started pumping slow and methodical for a good 3 minutes or so until he grew accustomed to the size of my cock. It was fascinating to feel his large body tremble with each thrust. By now he was really gasping and moaning in pure pleasure. At this point, we kind of bouncing off each other as I slammed my cock in and out of him.
‘Oh that’s the way.’ Bill said looking straight down into my eyes.
The knowledge that I was giving this hot man so much pleasure filled me with pride. Bill was really enjoying himself at this point as he was rocking onto my cock. Most of the pleasure he was feeling now was coming from his ass, rather than his cock as he was moaning and babbling incoherently. By now his asshole spasming around my probing cock. And now all I wanted to do was cum as I couldn’t take anymore. I buried my cock deep into his hole and held it there as I pumped a full load of cum into him. Burst after burst of cum coated his insides as we held our positions, gasping for breath, but satisfied.
“That’s something I have wanted to do to you ever since I found out that you were gay.” Bill confessed as he grimaced and pulled himself reluctantly up and off my still swollen dick.
“I guess both of us had fantasies fulfilled today.”
[THE END]
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#TwinPeaks revival: 8 things fans need to know
“Twin Peaks is a mystery that holds other mysteries,” says David Lynch when asked to sum up his legendary TV creation in a sentence. So it’s fitting that he wants to keep Showtime’s forthcoming revival of the cult classic as Laura Palmer as possible: wrapped in plastic and full of secrets. He’s doing it for your own good, you know! “People want to know right up until they know, and then they don’t care,” the director tells EW. “It’s really beautiful and you go into another world not knowing what you’re going to find.”
Still, we can tell you some stuff. The 18-hour limited event series is “a feature film in 18 parts,” says Lynch, who wrote the script with Twin Peaks co-creator Mark Frost over a period of three years and shot for 142 days over seven months, but not on Saturdays and Sundays. (Lynch doesn’t do weekends.) The script started in the area of 400-500 pages, but it grew during pre-production, and more so during production, as the cast kept expanding. Lynch used digital cameras for the shoot. “Film is organic, it’s beautiful, no two ways about it, it has a quality that I don’t think has been surpassed, but there’s so many drawbacks to it,” says Lynch, whose movies include lovingly crafted celluloid masterpieces like Eraserhead, The Elephant Man, and Blue Velvet. “Digital has gotten to a good point where you can get a pretty beautiful thing, and there’s a million things you can do with it. And even if you shoot on film, you’re going to end up transferring it onto a digital format eventually. So digital is pretty beautiful, and it assures you you’re going to have a chance of everybody seeing the same thing.”
Angelo Badalamenti, a frequent Lynch collaborator who did the music for the original Twin Peaks, is doing the music for the revival. Lynch is a musician himself, and he plays a mean, home-made guitar. When I asked him if he’ll be playing on the soundtrack, he said no, but then his producing partner, Sabrina S. Sutherland, corrected him. “There are a couple things.”
“There are?” he asked.
“Yes, there are,” she said.
He shrugged. “Okay, then maybe I did.”
Here are some other things that might be true about Twin Peaks:
1. Everyone in Hollywood is in it.
Okay, that’s not true at all, but it sure feels like it. There are 217 people in the cast, including most of the original cast. Notable omissions include Lara Flynn Boyle (Donna), Moira Kelly (who played Donna in the Twin Peaks: Fire Walk with Me movie), Michael Ontkean (Sheriff Harry S. Truman), Joan Chen (Josie Packard), and Piper Laurie (Catherine Martell ). Jack Nance, a longtime Lynch player (Eraserhead) who played Pete Martell, and Frank Silva, the set dresser whom Lynch famously cast on the fly to play BOB, passed away before the project was conceived. Notable newcomers including Laura Dern, Naomi Watts, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Monica Bellucci, Michael Cera, James Belushi, Tim Roth, Robert Forster, Pearl Jam frontman Eddie Vedder, and more. Lynch won’t say who the newbies will be playing, and it’s quite possible many will have blink-and-you’ll-miss-them cameos. The way some actors tell it, it sounds like some people called up, asked if they could be in the show, and Lynch said, “You bet!” Says Kyle MacLachlan: “I would hear stories from them about how they were heavily influenced by Twin Peaks, and so they wanted to be part of the new series, even if it was just one day of shooting. For others, it was about working with David because he is so phenomenal. It just kept growing.” Asked who Vedder plays, MacLachlan says: “You know, I didn’t know Eddie was there. But I think he sings.”
2. That fan theory you like might be true. Or not.
In the season 2 finale of Twin Peaks, which ended up being the series finale of the show, Agent Cooper enters The Black Lodge and encounters the specter of Laura Palmer (Sheryl Lee). “I’ll see you again 25 years,” she says. Then, after adding, “Meanwhile…,” she strikes a vogue pose and freezes. The popular theory among fans is that the revival — which arrives nearly 26 years after the last episode aired — will retroactively turn the line into a prophecy. Put another way: The new Twin Peaks will be set in the present. Frost said as much in the early press about the project, and if you look at EW’s first look photos from the production, you’ll see there’s no attempt to make the actors look anything any younger than they are. (Although we think it’s odd that many of them still dress as they did back in the day.) But the official word from Lynch — clearly the lead creative pilot on the revival — is that you shouldn’t assume anything about what you’ll see on screen. He won’t even confirm that the original cast will actually be playing their original characters in any real way, except for one: Kyle MacLachlan will reprise his role as FBI Agent Dale Cooper. Lynch himself will be in it, playing Cooper’s boss Gordon Cole, or some version of him. “Gordon is a fantastic person,” is all Lynch will say about the character. What’s it like directing himself? Lynch laughs. “Gordon doesn’t need much direction,” he says.
3. It doesn’t all take place in Twin Peaks.
“It takes place all over the country,” says David Nevins, Showtime’s president and CEO. “Twin Peaks is an important locus, but it’s not the only locus.”
4. Expect a lot of Agent Cooper, and a lot of mythology.
Nevins says that he was prepared to say yes to the new Twin Peakseven before Lynch and Frost pitched the project to him in 2014. But he did need to hear two things; we’ll tackle them separately. First, he wanted to hear that the story would have a lot of Agent Cooper. Check! “I’m really interested in the journey of Agent Cooper — where he’s coming from, where he’s going to, and what the obstacles in his way are,” says Nevins. “That, to me, just as a viewer, was my core interest in what happened to Agent Cooper.”
The original Twin Peaks ended with a number of cliffhangers, none more shocking or disturbing than the fate of Agent Cooper. While trying to rescue his girlfriend Annie from the clutches of former partner Windom Earle in The Black Lodge, Cooper was assaulted by his own dark-side doppelgänger. In the episode’s final shot, we saw that it was Cooper’s dark half — or, to put the same idea a different way, Cooper possessed by demon BOB — that made it out of that red-curtained underworld. “As we left, evil has established a beachhead in Twin Peaks through Agent Cooper,” says MacLachlan, who declined to elaborate further, other than to say that he found it very rewarding to play Cooper’s dark side, and that we might be surprised how Cooper reconciles and resolves this crisis of duality. “Twin Peaks is a cosmology,” says Nevins. “What I think is satisfying about the new version is that it’s a deeper exploration of that stuff. What is the red room? How does the red room work? Where is Agent Cooper? Can he make it back?”
5. Expect pure grade Lynchiness.
The second thing Nevins needed to hear was that Lynch would direct the whole thing. Check! Nevins was quoted earlier this year as saying that new Twin Peaks is “the pure heroin of David Lynch.” Asked to elaborate, Nevins recently told EW: “What I really meant was like uncut and that it’s just a very pure form. We are getting to observe a master artist, master filmmaker getting to use all of the tools that he’s developed over the course of his career. It just feels like that sort of uncut, unadulterated version of it.” That’s important, he says, because “my only anxiety was that the show not feel like the ersatz version of Twin Peaks. We weren’t going to do ‘Twin Peaks: The Remake,’ and David would lend his name and someone else would write and direct it.”
6. Okay, but what kind of pure grade Lynchiness?
Lynch’s films often feel dreamy or nightmarish or both, but some are as linear as The Straight Story and some are as looping as Mulholland Drive. Which one will the new Twin Peaks be? “The honest answer is both,” says Nevins. Adds Gary Levine, Showtime’s president of programming: “There’s a very compelling spine through this story, and yet there are diversions, tangents, fantasy.”
7. It might not be as TV-MA as you think.
Some fans are assuming that Lynch will take full advantage of pay cable’s creative freedoms and deliver an R-rated version of Twin Peaks, à la Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me. “He is taking advantage of cable freedoms and there are moments of very strong material, but David’s pretty clean,” says Nevins. “There’s darkness and there’s scariness, but a lot less cursing and probably somewhat less nudity than most of our other programming. Definitely a lot less cursing…. Part what defines David as such an entertaining filmmaker is he’s got such a range of tones. It’s funny, it’s dramatic, it’s emotional, it’s shocking, and occasionally it’s violent, but a lot of times the violence is more implied than shown. That’s one of the things I really like about the show, there’s just such a satisfying range of tones. I don’t like things that are one thing. I like things that are lots of things.”
8. Lynch wants you to watch the show on a TV with a great sound system.
Lynch doesn’t just take great care making images — he’s also known for his dense, intricate soundscapes. Hence, he really hopes you have a home entertainment system that’ll flatter it, and if not, you’ll invest in one. Because art, people! Art! “It’s not just for me, it’s important for everyone! Sound and picture flowing together in time is the thing, that is cinema, and it’s just so beautiful, it’s got to be protected. So on little speakers on a computer or laptop or something, it’s like you have a B-52 bomber flying close in the sky, just barreling along, and it becomes like a mosquito on the little machine. It’s pathetic.” Besides, we hear there’s someone plays some mean guitar on the soundtrack, and you surely don’t want to miss that.
The Twin Peaks revival debuts May 21 at 9 p.m. ET on Showtime.
(TP)
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