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nataliedanovelist · 4 years

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Meet the Pines

When ten-year-old Stanford Pines accidentally stumbles across a time machine, he then finds himself in the middle of a forest and somewhere he finally feels ta home.

For @persimmonpollywog, who inspired me to bring an idea to life.

~~~~~~~~~~

January 1960-something

Stanford held his jacket a little tighter around himself. It was chilly here in the wintry late-afternoon, but it was better being cold on the Stan O’ War than being warm at home. Here, no one called him a wimp. Here, no one saw him as a freak or a loser. Here, he was free to be as upset as he wanted to be. He didn’t want to cry, but if he couldn’t hold it in any longer than at least no one was around to see it.

Yesterday had been a bad day. Crampelter had cornered Stanford after school, while Stanley was busy talking to some girl, and eventually had the ten-year-old pinned to the cold concrete with a knee to his back, pulling his arm back and almost dislocating his shoulder until Stanley came and shoved the bully off his brother. All of the boxing lessons were starting to pay off as Stanley walked away with less scrapes and bruises than normal, but he still had to serve after-school detention today. The twins tried to hide their injuries on the way to the bathroom, but Ma saw them and knelt to look them over. Before Stanley and Stanford could convince their mother they were okay, Pa showed up and snapped, demanding if the boys had lost another fight and when they were going to quit getting their butts handed to them. Ma then stood and shouted at Pa and the two screamed at each other for what felt like forever while they fixed each other up with their first aid kit and spent the rest of the night in their room to avoid the fighting. No kid likes hearing their parents yell.

Stanford’s shoulder didn’t hurt as much anymore and the bruise on his back was still big and purple and black, but at least he could hide it. As much as Stanford tried to ignore it, even reading a book he normally would have enjoyed, the voices in his head kept on shouting at him.

“Dorks and losers!”

“FREAK!”

“When are you gonna stand up for yourself like a man?!”

“DON’T TOUCH ME!”

“Watch it, Six-Finger’s got the plague!”

“You’ll NEVER make any friends!”

Stanford closed his book, shut his eyes, took off his glasses, and scrubbed at his eyes with a fist and pinched the bridge of his button nose to try to compose himself. Stanford then used his blurry vision to look down at his birth defect. His vision became even worse when more tears formed, eventually making the boy buried his head in his arms and he quietly cried. Crampelter was right. Stanford was never going to make any friends. No one would ever want him around.

Okay, maybe Stanley did, but he wasn’t here right now, and how long it would be until Stanley decided he was tired of being made fun of? Stanford truly believed that Stanley was cool enough to make it on his own. He’d bet his chemistry set that if Stanley had never defended Stanford, never been his brother, he wouldn’t be made fun of as much as he was now. Sure, Stanley Pines messed up a bunch, but he was funny and smart in a way you can’t teach to somebody and girls seemed to like him. What was stopping him from getting any gal he wanted and being an all star boxer or a superhero? His freak of a twin. The mistake.

These thoughts plagued and poisoned Stanford, who let them flow and then leave him. While he didn’t disbelieve these bad thoughts anymore, they were no longer screaming at him, so he had the strength to go home. Maybe he’d feel better in his warm bed instead of the cold unfinished ship.

Stanford stood and smiled hopefully at the Stan O’ War. Last summer, right after the boys had turned ten, they had found the shipwreck sailboat in a cave and took it as their anchor for a better future.

“One of these days, you and me are gonna sail away from this dumb town. We’ll hunt for treasure, get all the girls, and be an unstoppable team of adventurers.”

Stanford carried that message with him nearly every day, and he doubted the day would come when he stopped. He picked up his backpack and started on the walk for home. The wind howled, making Stanford shiver, and he picked up the pace. He wished summer would get here, he didn’t like the cold. Something on the sidewalk in town nearly made Stanford trip, but he caught himself in time and turned to see what it was.

The boy raised an eyebrow to find a tape measure. It was black and yellow and had two weird triangles on it. “Huh. I don’t recognize that company.” He muttered to himself as he picked up the measurer. He pulled on the tape, as children will with these types of tape measures, and he realized too late that it didn’t read inches and centimetres; it read years, but Stanford had already released the tape and then he was gone with a flash.

~~~~~~~~~~

May 2016

After the flash was gone, one of the first things Stanford noticed was that he was warm. Really warm. And something was crackling behind him and smelled like burning fabric. Stanford threw off his backpack and stomped on it until the little fire went out. Once that panic was gone, new panic came as he realized he was in the middle of some woods. He had never been in the forest before, except for the little patches by the ravine, but the ravine was dangerous and only for stupid teenagers, so Stanford didn’t go there if he could help it.

Once he knew he was safe, he looked down at the tape measure. “What the heck is this thing?” He asked himself as he cautiously pulled out the tape. It read measurements of time instead of measurements of space. He slowly let the tape back in the machine and put it in his jacket’s pocket, deciding it would be best to try to figure this weird tape measure out later. More importantly, when was he?

Stanford looked around the fellow pines he was surrounded by and he smiled at the peaceful smell. It reminded him of the holidays and when Christmas trees would be up for sale at the park. Stanford understood his family didn’t celebrate Christmas, and he was fine with instead celebrating a holiday that lasted seven days, but he wished just once they would bring a pinetree into their house just to make all the rooms smell nice. Stanford could hear birds, for once not choking on glass or honking. They either tweeted or knocked on wood. Here, in the quiet and in the warmth, Stanford felt much better than he did five minutes ago, despite being in a strange setting and far away from home.

Stanford thought he could hear the vague sound of a car, and so the boy hurriedly followed him to it. Where there was a vehicle there was probably a town. Stanford saw a dirt road and watched as a car drove one way. He could follow it, but when he looked toward where the car had come from, he could have sworn he saw a wooden structure of some sort through the trees. Stanford emerged from the woods and walked alongside the road.

“Okay, the tape measure had been set to forward.” Stanford thought out-loud to himself to try to think clearly. “And if there’s cars, I’m definitely in the future, but how far? I didn’t see how many years ahead it sent me. Maybe I’ll finally meet a robot!”

As Stanford walked along the old road, it became clear to him that either he hadn’t time traveled that far into the future or he was somewhere considered “old” by this time’s standards. Stanford awed happily at an old cabin with a triangular roof with a big sign that read “Mystery Shack”, but the S was on the grass. There was a goat munching on a tin can and it looked at Stanford with it’s weird yellow eyes, but Stanford grinned at the goat and carried on his way.

“What is this place?” He asked himself. “Some kind of haunted house?” The word “Mystery” was enough to lure him towards the building and he saw a door with a sign that read “gift shop,” so Stanford decided to check that place out first.

A bell greeted him and Stanford smiled at the little shop. A pretty lady with a hat and a green question-mark t-shirt was at the cash register, helping an old lady buy a keychain with a spaceship on it. Stanford grinned as more and more things were his taste. There were baseball caps with pinetrees, question marks everywhere, some kind of Aztec wheel in the back, a monkey-fish - no! A Mer-key! - in a tank, and newspapers and magazines full of supernatural evidence. Stanford grinned and took a newspaper with a UFO on the front and opened it.

Before Stanford was too sucked into the story of the alien-sighting in Wyoming, he could hear the lady at the cash register groan and say to the old woman, “I’m sorry, ma’am, this drawer is always getting stuck. Here, let’s see if my husband has any change for you.” And they walked through a door with red curtains.

Stanford looked at the register. It looks pretty close to the one at Pa’s shop. Curious, Stanford sat the paper down and went over to the drawer. There was a toolbox open by the vending machine, so he borrowed a red screwdriver and pulled a flashlight out from his jacket and got to work to try to fix the cash register.

He found the clip that wasn’t releasing and managed to temporarily open the drawer, but the issue was, for the time being, you needed the screwdriver every time you wanted to open the drawer, so Stanford unscrewed some screws to look at the drawer’s workings and he patiently fixed the clip so it was hooked the way it should be. Stanford smiled proudly at himself, happy to help that lady, and he put the drawer back together and closed it with a little ding.

“Whatcha doin’, dawg?”

Stanford jumped a foot in the air and looked up to find the lady back with a big man beside her, the big man standing in Stanford’s way of leaving the counter. He was a chubby guy and reminded Ford of a gopher. He had a red fez with a golden crescent (kinda like Pa’s if Stanford was being honest) and he wore a suit and an eyepatch.

Stanford was shaking as he realized how bad it looked to have some kid standing by the cash; if this was Pa’s store he would have called the police. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry! I just wanted to fix your drawer, I’m sorry!” Stanford yelped and sat the screwdriver down on the counter and shoved his hands in his pockets; he didn’t want this big man to think he was stealing anything, cash or tools.

“Whoa, whoa,” The big guy said and with his hands up to stop him. He was smiling nicely at Stanford and he slowly began to calm down. “It’s okay, dude, I get it. You’re not in trouble. Now let’s see if you fixed this old girl.”

The big guy reached over to the register and pressed a button. The drawer slid open gracefully, making the lady and the big guy grin. “Wow. I’ve never seen that thing work so well.” The lady said.

“Me neither, and I’ve been here for fifteen years!” The big guy patted Stanford’s shoulder. “You did a good job, dude. I’m impressed.”

Stanford’s face suddenly felt really hot, like the kind of hot it gets when someone points out his six fingers, but his gut wasn’t squirming around in the usual bad way. And Stanford found it hard not to smile. “Th-Thank you.”

“Thank you,” The big guy said with a grin. “What do I owe you for a job well done?”

Stanford stared at the big guy, wondering if he was joking, but the big guy and the lady just smiled at him and suddenly he noticed how empty his stomach felt. “Can I have a snack?” And he pointed to the vending machine.

The big guy grinned and nodded. “Sure, dude! Hungry?” Right on cue, Stanford’s stomach growled. He held his jacket tighter around himself and blushed, but the big guy and lady just chucked.

“No wonder, it’s almost lunchtime.” The lady pointed out as her watch told her it was almost one.

“Well, hey, Abuelita would love some more mouths to feed.” The big guy said and asked Stanford, “Why don’t you ask your folks if you can join us for lunch?”

“My parents aren’t here.” Stanford said, unable to believe what was happening in front of him. “It’s just me.”

“Oh. Well, wanna stay for lunch?” The big guy offered nicely. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to, but we’d love to have you…”

“Yes, please!” Stanford answered happily. “Sounds like fun!”

“Sweet!” The big guy dipped his fez to the boy and said, “Mr. Mystery at your service, little dude! But you can call me Soos! This here my wife, Melody. Want a tour of the Mystery Shack before lunch?”

“Sure!” Stanford even pulled out his notepad and pencil from his jacket and held it ready for note taking.

Soos laughed, grabbed an eight-ball cane, and led the way through the doorway with red curtains. Stanford was amazed to find a little museum full of odd stuff! Left and right there were strange anomalies and attractions that were just the coolest! Stanford had only seen stuff like this in his dreams, and now it was all here in front of him.

Soos cleared his throat and declared, “Dear gentleman! Looking around my Mystery Shack, you’ll see many wondrous befuddlement, unlike anything you have ever seen before! Feast your eyes, on the dangerously adorable Unicat!” And he gestured to a fluffy orange tabby with a unicorn’s corn tied to it’s head. The kitty was sleeping on a fluffy cat’s bed and Stanford grinned and began to sketch it.

“Now beware, tourist, not only could this guy make you sneeze, Mr. Wiggles is so adorable he can literally bend you to his will.” Mr. Mystery warned with wiggling fingers. “One minute he’s purring in your hand and the next he’s biting your hand, but don’t worry, just give him a treat and he’ll be putty in your hands, dawg.” Soos pulled out a bag from his suit and asked, “Wanna give the Unicat a treat?”

Stanford grinned and happily let Soos shake a treat onto his palm. Mr. Wiggles woke up and sat patiently on the bed. Stanford gave it to him and scratched Mr. Wiggles under his chin while the kitty munch on his treat and purred. Then he was ready for his nap again.

“Up next, I give you a rare picture of a horse riding another horse!”

The whole thirty-minute tour Soos amazed Stanford with the Rock That Looks Like a Face, London Bridge made out of popsicle sticks, other strange photos and articles framed on the walls, and finally the good ole Sascrotch. Stanford attentively asked questions and Soos happily answered all of them.

This little guy was reminding Soos of a younger version of himself more and more. He was helpful and nice and kinda shy and quiet, but Soos could tell this dude was special. Soos wondered if Mr. Pines felt this way about him when he first came to the Mystery Shack.

Melody eventually called Soos and Stanford in for lunch and Stanford let Soos put a hand on his shoulder and led him through the “Employees Only” door. Stanford was surprised to find what appeared to be a house. Not that he was too surprised, Stanford’s family lived above their shop, but still. It looked like a really nice place to live. He had always wanted to live in a cabin! “Wow, you have a really nice house.”

“Thanks, dawg.” Soos patted his shoulder and pointed towards the kitchen. “Mm. Smells like Abuelita made tamales!”

Melody was fixing glasses of water while Abuelita stirred a pot. Stanford smiled at the old lady in an apron with soft old-lady skin. She smiled and shuffled over to the boy. “Aye! ¡Qué niño tan dulce! Hola, niño! Look at you! So thin! You must be hungry.” She cooed and made Stanford sit at the table so she could pile his plate high with rice, beans, and tamales. “Here, eat up.”

Stanford didn’t know much Spanish, but he did know one phrase. “Muchas gracias, señora!”

Ma was a great cook, but she didn’t look much Mexican. There was a taco place that was okay, but this was real Mexican food and it tasted so good! Stanford, who hadn’t eaten since lunch, was starving and happily cleaned his plate while he listened to Melody and Soos talk about work and their plan for the day. They occasionally asked Stanford something and let him talk, but Stanford was happy to quietly eat and the grown-ups respected that.

“Oh, you’re a twig, niño,” Abuelita commented as she carried the plate full of tamales over to him and gave him another. “Here, have some more.”

“No, gracias.” Stanford said politely, making sure to say thank you.

“I asked if you would like more tamales.” Abuelita said with a bit of a scary voice and a stern look. One glance at Soos and Stanford saw him smile and nod his head, advising to accept the food.

“Uh… si?”

“That’s what I thought you said.” Abuelita said happily and gladly piled four more tamales on poor Stanford’s plate.

A few minutes later, a door opened in the distance and a voice called teasingly, “‘Sup, Mr. Ramierez!”

“In the kitchen, Wendy!” Soos called back.

“Aw man, Dipper and Mabel not here yet?”

“No, bus doesn’t get here for a few more hours.”

“Dang it.”

Stanford looked at the doorway and his jaw dropped. A very pretty red-headed girl with freckles, a blue flannel, and one of those pinetree hats, stood with jeans and hiking boots. Stanford was kinda reminded of Stanley; they both gave off an atmosphere of confidence and bigger-than-what-you-expect attitude. Wendy looked at the new guy and smiled. “Great, did you two kidnap some kid?”

Soos laughed and ruffled his fluffy brown hair. “Nope! This little dude helped fix the cash register.”

“Oh, new handyman, huh?” Wendy asked as she stole a tamale off his plate and leaned against his chair.

“Well,” Soos shrugged and smiled at Stanford. “If he wants the job, sure.”

“Wait, really?” Stanford asked. “You want me as a handyman?”

“Sure! Why not? You know how to fix a golf cart?”

“Well, I don’t know if I…”

“Boom!” Soos threw a random question-mark staff t-shirt at his face and announced happily, “You’re hired! One size fits all, dawg! The golf cart’s okay for the most part, but it’s not quite charging right. Think you can look at the battery or the charger?”

“Oh,” Stanford was having a hard time taking this in. First these guys actually liked him, and now they wanted him to stay and work?! He grinned from ear-to-ear with shiny brown eyes, hopped off his chair, slipped off his jacket, and changed shirts as quickly as possible so he could put his jacket back on over his staff t-shirt. “Okay!”

“What’s your name, anyway?” Wendy asked as he patted his hard enough on the back that he went “oof.”

Stanford opened his mouth, but hesitated. If he was going to stay here, some time-cops might come looking for him. Or he might mess up the time-space continuum more than he has. But what if it was always supposed to be this way? What if Stanford Pines went missing and was never found again? What if somewhere there was an unsolved report of a missing boy that no one missed? What if Stanford had found that tape measure for a reason? Deciding to play it safe and making up his mind to start over and stay, Stanford quickly answered with, “Phil.”

~~~~~~~~~~

The golf cart was easy to find. Stanford popped the hood and saw the battery. It was a bit too advanced, not because of the technology, but because Stanford is only ten and had never fiddled with a car battery before, but he knew enough about batteries as a whole to teach himself what to do. It turned out the goat had chewed on the cord so sometimes the battery would receive charge, sometimes it wouldn’t, so all Stanford had to do was fix it with special black tape.

After that, Stanford went inside to see if anything needed to be fixed or to ask Soos what he wanted him to do, when he caught a glimpse of someone climbing up a ladder. Curious, Stanford climbed up and opened a little door to find Wendy up on the roof and sitting in a lawn chair.

“Whoa, what is this place?” He asked.

Wendy smiled with a soda in her hand and said, “Just my hang-out. Great place to come to hide from work. Wanna a soda, bud?”

“Sure, thanks.” Stanford smiled to see that familiar Pitt soda now in a can. Really weird, considering he was used to bottles, but he knew how to open a can and found he didn’t mind the change in containers for his drink.

“So, Phil,” Wendy said casually. “If you could go anywhere in the world, where and why?”

Stanford sat on the roof with his feet dangling off the edge. “I don’t know. I want to travel the world. I want to see it all.”

“An adventurer, I like your moxie, kid.” Wendy said. “Gravity Falls is alright, but I wanna go see a big city, like New York or even just San Francisco.”

“I’ve been to New York.” Stanford shared. It was true; the Big Apple was only an hour drive (two if there was bad traffic) from Glass Shard. “I wouldn’t want to live there, but it’s a nice place to visit. Lots of museums and historical records…”

Wendy laughed and shook her head. “You’d like my friend Dipper. He’s a nerd, too.”

Stanford’s cheeks turned red, happy that this pretty girl seemed to like him. Not that he ever had a chance with her! She was eighteen and he was ten. “Who’s Dipper?”

“My best friend.” Wendy said proudly. “He might be a nerd, but he’s also, like, the coolest guy I’ve ever met. A good friend, too. Hey, you’ll actually get to meet him today! He and his sister Mabel are coming to spend the summer and they’re supposed to get here some point today.”

“Cool! I’m excited to meet them. I don’t have any friends back home.” Stanford let slip.

“Well, you’ve got some now.” Wendy reassured the kid and lightly punched his shoulder.

Stanford punched back as he laughed and he then asked, “So, what’s your favorite type of snack food?”

“Oh man, I can’t just pick one. Popcorn’s a big one. Really, anything salty. You?”

“Does jelly beans count or is that a candy?”

“Naw, man, that’s a snack food.”

“Jelly beans it is, then!”

“Phil! The portable toilets are clogged!” Soos called from inside the shack.

Stanford took a minute to register who his new boss was talking to and then sighed and stood up. “Back to work.”

“Later, dork.” Wendy said with a wink and Stanford climbed down with a dorky smile.

The red head sighed happily as a breeze drifted by, free from having to make-up an excuse as to why she can’t attend to the bathrooms, and she sipped her soda and watched the sun slowly sink. A little while after Phil left, Wendy heard the familiar roar of a bus and saw it pull up to the tourist trap, but instead of a small group of tourists spilling out, two teenagers walked out with their arms full of luggage and a pig at their feet.

“YES!” Wendy stomped her boots on the roof and yelled, “THEY’RE HERE! DIPPER! MABEL!” Using her trusty pinetrees, Wendy climbed down and ran to her favorite pair of twins and hugged them. “I’ve missed you, you weirdos!”

“Aw, Wendy!” Mabel cooed.

“We’ve missed you, too.” Dipper assured her and the hug ended so they could look at each other properly.

Dipper had hit a growth spurt since last summer and was now an inch or two taller than Mabel. He wore an opened blue flannel over his orange t-shirt with his jeans and Wendy’s borrowed hat. As tradition, Wendy swapped Dipper’s pinetree hat for her fur cap back and they high-fived when Dipper fixed his cap so it didn’t cover his eyes. Mabel still wore her sweaters and skirts, but now her hair was only shoulder-length and her braces were long-gone. Today she wore her yellow “Hug Me” sweater with a pink skirt and headband to match.

“Wow, you guys look great!” Wendy complimented. She noticed Waddles making his way to Gompers and them falling asleep on the porch with the goat.

“Thanks,” Dipper said as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Can you believe we’re the same age as you when we met?”

“I know, right?! It’s so weird!”

“DUDES!” Mabel and Dipper braced themselves as a heavy man swept them up into his arms and squeezed so hard their faces turned blue. “I missed you two so much! I’ve got a bunch of new attractions to show you and fun stuff to do this summer! This’ll be the best one yet!”

“Soos, can’t breathe.” Dipper wheezed.

“Who cares?” Mabel said hoarsely. “Anything for a Soos-hug.”

Soos finally managed to let them go and he grabbed their suitcases for them. “Here, let me help you dawgs get settled in your room. You’re still cool with sharing with your grunkles, right?”

“Always are.” Mabel reassured him. With Melody and Soos in Ford’s old room and Abuelita in Stan’s old room, that only left the attic for guests, so every summer when the Pines family came home they had to share, but with two pairs of bunk beds and plants of woods for some alone time during the day, it was comfortable enough for the summer. Besides, it was a good way to make up for lost time during the fall, winter, and spring.

As Soos, Wendy, Dipper and Mabel went into the house by the back door, Mr. Mystery called out, “Hey, Phil! C’mere, there’s some dudes I want you to meet!”

“Who’s Phil?” Dipper asked.

“My new handyman!” Soos said proudly as he sat the suitcases on the stairs for a few minutes. “Really smart dude, fixed the cash register and the golf cart already!”

“Aw, you have your own wittle Soos!” Mabel exclaimed with rosy cheeks and bright eyes. “Well I can’t wait to meet him.”

“Yeah, he’s kind of a nerd like you, Dip-Dip.” Wendy added as she elbowed him.

“Well how long has he been working here?” Dipper asked.

“Just today.” Soos answered. “I really like him. I think he’ll end up being a member of the family soon enough.”

“Sorry, Mr. Mystery,” A voice called from outside. “I only got one toilet unclogged, but I’ll clean the others!”

“It’s okay, dawg,” Soos hollered back.

The door opened and the ten-year-old looked around. “You wanted to see me, sir?”

Dipper and Mabel dumbfounded. It was like seeing a cartoon character come to life. That little sunburnt boy in all those childhood photos Ma Pines and their grunkles had shown them was now right here in front of them in a Mystery Shack staff t-shirt and brown jacket, smiling at the little gang. He cocked his head and looked curiously at the teenagers, who were looking at him like he had lobsters crawling out of his ears. Embarrassed, Stanford’s face turned red and he hid his hands behind his back.

“Yeah, Phil, this here is Dipper and Mabel!” Soos introduced, writing off the twins’ reaction as shocked by the boy’s cuteness and Phil’s quietness as shyness from meeting new people. “Dudes, this here Phil! If you need something that needs fixin’, just go to this guy right here.” And Soos ruffled his hair playfully, making Stanford feel better and smile with his blush still intact.

“Uh… nice to meet you.” Dipper muttered.

“OH MY GOSH!” Mabel ran up to Stanford and scooped him up into a hug. “You’re SO CUTE! Who’s a wittle guy, who’s a wittle guy?! Is it you, is it you?” She cooed and hugged him tightly and combed his hair with her fingers.

“Whoa, hey!” Stanford squirmed a little bit but slowly stopped fighting. He had never been swallowed with so much hugs before and kinda liked it. “N-Nice to meet you. I like you. You’re weird.”

“Great,” Dipper said slowly and moved towards his sister to grab her arm. “So why don’t we get to know Phil somewhere else.” And he dragged them off somewhere else.

Wendy looked at Soos curiously and asked, “What was that all about?”

Soos shrugged and picked up the suitcases to take them upstairs. “Teens are crazy.”

~~~~~~~~~~

Stanford was engulfed in darkness until a bright light was turned on by a pull of a metal string. The boy blinked his eyes to adjust to the light and found he was in some sort of small, dark, cramped space with the two teenagers in front of him, side by side. The girl, Mabel, was grinning really big, but the boy, Dipper, had his arms crossed over his chest and looked both stern and worried. They both somewhat looked familiar to Stanford, but he couldn’t figure out why.

“Alright, what are you doing?!” Dipper hissed at Stanford. “How did you even get here? And where’s the time machine?!”

The idea of playing dumb wasn’t going to work, Stanford realized, as he paled a sheet and swallowed nervously. “You… You know I’m from the past?”

“Yes, we do, Stanford Pines.” Dipper said firmly, making Stanford shiver.

Mabel noticed this and thought her brother was being too harsh, so she slipped in, “But we’re really happy to see you, Ford!”

“But what you’re doing is really dangerous.” Dipper warned in a calmer tone. “By missing in the past you’re jeopardizing the future.”

“You don’t understand.” Stanford insisted. “No one back home will miss me. I’m a nobody in the past, but here people actually like me. Why can’t I stay?”

“Now wait a minute,” Mabel said gently and put a hand on one of his shoulders. “You really think Stan won’t miss you?”

Stanford froze at that. The idea of Stanley all alone made his chest ache, but he shook his head and looked away from the teenagers before him. “He’s better off without me.” He mumbled.

“No he’s not.”

“Yes…”

“No, he’s not.” Dipper insisted and sat on a box to be eye-level with Stanford. “Listen to me, I don’t know if you noticed this or not, kid, but we’re twins, too. We understand more than you think we do. Sometimes you think you’re not good enough and sometimes you think it’ll be better for both of you if you went your separate ways, but… but family sticks together, no matter what. It doesn’t matter if it’s a twin or a parent or just a really good friend, one day you’re gonna realize how much you need your family and I really really hope for you it’s not before it’s too late.”

Stanford, frustrated that he didn’t have a good comeback, decided to turn the tables. “Now, wait a minute, how did you even know I was from the past? And how did you know about Stanley?”

Dipper and Mabel exchanged uneasy facial expressions and Mabel then said to Stanford, “Look, Ford, please. You have to trust us. I know things are hard for you right now, but things will get better…”

Stanford scowled at that. They weren’t listening! They just didn’t understand! “You don’t know that! You don’t know what I’ve been through! I’m a nobody in the past, I’m a freak in the past!” And he even held a hand out to their faces so they could see his six fingers. With tears in his eyes, the boy yelled, “This is the one place I feel at home, and I won’t let you take that away from me!” And with that, Stanford pulled the time machine out of his pocket, threw it on the floor, and smashed it with his sneakered foot.

“Stanford!” Mabel scolded.

“What did you do?!” Dipper yelled as he got on his knees and began to scoop up the broken pieces.

Stanford spun around, opened the closet, and left without another word.

“We should’ve told him we were family.” Mabel said quietly.

“No,” Dipper snapped as he stood up and exited the closest with his sister. “If he found out it could mess up our present. We need to try to get him to go back to Glass Shard.”

“All while keeping it a secret that we’re Pines, too, and also keeping it a secret that Phil is baby Ford?” Mabel clarified and rubbed her forehead. “And you do realize we’ve got until tonight when Grunkle Stan and Ford come home and will definitely recognize him?”

“I know.” Dipper sighed. “I’ll work on fixing the time machine. You’re better with people, you try to convince Ford to go back to his own time.”

“You got it, Dippin’ Sauce.” Mabel said and went off to try to find her wittle uncle.

Stanford was true to his word and went straight to finish unclogging the toilets, so that kept Mabel away from the most part and she got distracted catching up with Wendy. As the sun got lower into the sky, Dipper sat on his bottom bunk and fixed the time machine, meanwhile Mabel had to try to earn Stanford’s trust, but the little guy was doing a good job of avoiding her.

Time was running out, and after Stanford raked the yard, cleaned the gutters, washed Soos’ truck, and a bunch of probably unnecessary chores just to keep him busy, Soos proudly patted Stanford’s back and said, “Good job, little dude! You can go home now.”

“Oh,” Stanford rubbed the back of his neck bashfully. “Uh, are you sure there’s nothing else I can do, sir. M-Maybe I can sweep or…”

Soos raised an eyebrow, picking up how sweaty and nervous the kid was about going home, and he smiled gently. “Hey, I get it. I’m not kicking you out or anything. If you wanna stay, stay as long as you want. Heck, you can spend the night if you want to. The couch is always here.”

Stanford smiled up at his new boss. “Thank you so much, Mr. Mystery.”

“Hey, you can just call me Soos.” He offered. “And if you need to talk, I’m here for you, dude.”

Stanford nodded. “Okay.”

Mabel pulled out all the stops. She laid a bunch of arts n’ crafts stuff laid out on the card table and she stopped Stanford as he passed the living room. “Hey, S-Phil! Wanna make some puppets with me?”

“Oh boy, you’re not hungover some puppet-boy again, are you?” Wendy asked as she entered the room, oblivious to Stanford’s scowl.

“Haha! Nope!” Mabel said as Wendy sat with her. “Just felt like setting the arts n’ crafts master free tonight! Whaddya say, Phil? Wanna get in on this? We could make hand-turkeys, or finger-puppets, or paint our nails?”

“No, thanks.” The boy said coldly.

“Aw, come on.” Wendy teased and laid her hands out on the table. “Here, Mabel, I’ve been meaning to do my nails, mind fixing me up?”

“You bet, sister!”

Stanford stomped off angrily, but Mabel somehow managed to stay focused and she left Wendy, confused and alone at the table, so she could go after him. “St… Phil, wait! Let’s just talk.”

“Talk about what?” Stanford snapped and turned back to look at her angrily. “You’re trying to get rid of me! Why would you wanna talk to me if you don’t like me?”

Mabel gasped and covered her mouth. Stanford was so confused, having no idea why she suddenly looked so sad and hurt, and she sunk to her knees and put a hand on each of his shoulders. “That’s not true, Ford.” She whispered quietly. “Not only do I like you, but I love you. We all do. Which is why you have to go back to the past.”

Stanford blinked with surprise at finding Mabel looking so sad. It hurt more than he thought it would. And there it was again, that feeling like they had met before. She just looked so familiar… “But I don’t wanna go back.” Ford tried to explain yet again. “Why should I go back?”

“Cuz if you don’t the entire timeline could change.” Mabel stressed as calmly as she could, but she was failing, her arms trembling. “I can’t tell you too much, but… but by being here instead of your own time, you’re not doing things that’ll shape today. You have no idea what could happen, none of us do, but that’s what’s so scary.”

“Oh, come on, what could I do that’s so important it messes with time?” Stanford dared to ask.

Mabel opened her mouth and closed a few times, like a fish out of water, but with no explanation, Stanford shrugged her hands off of him and turned to the door. He tried to slam it to make it clear to Mabel he wanted to be alone, but in his fury he had stupidly closed the door with his right hand still on it, crushing his fingers.

“OW!”

It was a painful door jam, the kind that made your eyes water and made you wonder for a second if your hand was broken. Stanford held his hand by the wrist as his hand immediately swelled and looked red. Mabel covered her mouth again and got on one knee in front of him. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry! Let me see…”

“Whao, what happened?” Soos asked as he and Melody emerged from the kitchen and Wendy came out of the living room.

“S-Phil closed the door on his hand.” Mabel said as Stanford held his hand close to his chest and hid it with his uninjured hand.

“Aw, poor dude.” Soos went up to him and held out a sweet hand. “Here, lemme see it.”

“N-No!” Stanford stuttered. And took a step back, now being on the porch with everyone else inside. “It’s fine, I’m okay.”

“Don’t be afraid, Phil, just lemme take a look at it.” Soos said as he fixed his eyes, trying to see past the uninjured hand at the hurt hand, but then his eyes widened. No, he must have miss counted. No, he didn’t have… “Phil, lemme see.” He said firmly.

“No!” But Stanford was too slow and Soos had grabbed his hands as gently as he could and held the hurt hand, not only to check if it was broken, but to count his fingers. Suddenly a lot of things were clicking in Soos’ head and he felt like a big dummy dumb for not noticing who this little dude was sooner.

Soos, Melody, and Wendy gasped, making Stanford’s eyes sting. He blinked to make the stinging go away; he should be used to that kind of reaction. He yanked his hand out of Soos’ grasp and shoved both hands in his pockets.

“Dude!” Soos gasped, looking horrified. “Wh-Why didn’t you tell me?! I can’t believe…”

“Who cares?” Stanford asked, not looking at any of them. “It’s just a stupid birth defect.”

“No, I mean why didn’t you tell me you were Stanford Pines?!”

That got him to look up, terrified, and he saw the three shocked faces and the sad one Mabel wore. “But… But…”

“Sweet Paul Bunyan.” Wendy gasped. “It’s really him…”

“I thought you seemed familiar, but I just thought you were a lot like me!” Soos yelled in shock as he held his head. “But it turns out you were a lot like Dr. Pines?! MY MIND! It’S EXPLODED!”

It was slowly sinking in that these guys didn’t care that he had polydactyly; they cared that he was from the past, and apparently his older-self knew everyone here. Was that why Mabel and Dipper freaked out so much? “Wait, you… do you know me?”

Soos stared at Stanford in complete shock. “Of course we know you, dude! You’re…”

“Our friend!” Mabel interrupted. “A really good friend!”

“Yeah, man.” Wendy backed up. “Look, you’re a really great kid, but…”

“But you need to go back home.” Melody finished for her.

Stanford’s whole world was shaking. “Wh-What?! But you…”

“I know,” Soos said and got on one knee to be closer to his eye-level. “But… Dr… F-F-Ford, you’re… you’re a great kid, and we’d never do anything to hurt you, but you have to go back.”

The poor boy’s chest was suddenly feeling really heavy. His eyes were stinging again. He scowled angrily. He desperately didn’t want to go back home, but what was the point of staying here if no one wanted him around? “I thought you guys were my friends.” He croaked, unable to keep his emotions out of his voice.

“Stanford,” Mabel took a step forward, desperately wanting to hug him but she was treating him like a scared animal who would run off at the sight of too much movement. “We are your friends, but you have to trust us…”

Stanford squeezed his eyes shut and darted around for the woods, planning to just run and run until no one could find him, but something he didn’t see stood in his way and made Stanford fall flat on the grass, barely a foot away from the porch. Mabel, Wendy, Melody and Soos all hurried onto the porch and simultaneously gasped. Dipper came out with the fixed tape measure in hand and announced proudly, “Okay, I’ve fixed the time machine and - what the HECK is going on here?!”

Stanford had bumped into whatever he had hit so hard his glasses were skewed, but when he fixed them he marveled at who stood before him. A tall guy with a round gut, a brown coat over a t-shirt and worn jeans with boots, and a red beanie looked down at him. His gray hair passed his shoulders by an inch and he looked so much like Pa, but the sparkle in his brown eyes and the way he looked completely confused but took everything with a grain of salt was something Stanford could recognize anywhere. He didn’t even question it.

He hadn’t realized how much he had missed his twin until he was standing right in front of him. Who cares if he was old? With a trembling lip and wet matching eyes, Stanford lunged into Stan’s legs and hugged him tightly, burying his face in his jeans, the top of his head just barely reaching his hip.

“Whoa there,” Stan’s gravelly voice was strange to Stanford, but his strong hands still hugged him in return and rubbed circles into his back. “It’s alright there, Sixer. You’re okay. You care to explain what’s going on here, Poindexter?”

It sounded like Stan was no longer talking to Stanford. He wiped his button nose and eyes and barely let Stan go, just enough to look up at someone who was standing next to Stan. Stanford almost screamed, but he bit his lip in time. He didn’t need to look at this man’s hand to know who he was. He had Stanford’s fluffy hair, though gray with a light streak around it, he had Stanford’s cleft chin, and while this man also looked like Pa, there was only one person who could resemble Stan that much.

“Incredible,” Ford awed and pulled out a green journal from his blue coat and opened it. Like Stan, he also wore blue jeans and boots, but he had a red turtleneck under his blue coat from the looks of it. “I thought I had another year or two…”

“Did you clone yourself, you weirdo?” Stan asked.

“What, no! Of course not!” Ford laughed.

“Oh, this is that shapeshifter dude you were telling me about.”

“No, Stanley, it’s really me.” Ford knelt as he looked at Stanford, who still clung onto Stan’s leg tightly like it was a life preserver in the middle of an ocean. “Over fifty years ago I came across a tape measure while you were serving detention that transported me from Glass Shard to this place. Is that what happened to you?” He asked his younger self.

Stanford nodded. Ford smiled at him kindly and Stanford managed to smile back. He looked up at Stan and squeaked as timid as a mouse, “Is… Is that really you, Stanley?”

Stan chuckled and patted his shoulder. Did his brother always used to be so cute? “Yeah, kid, it’s me. Holy Moses, would you look at this little guy. You look just as I remember you, Stanford. Except not nearly as puny.”

“Hey, I’m not that small!” Stanford defended.

“Yup, that’s the stubborn brainiac I know!” Stan laughed.

Stanford smiled at him and then got an idea. Stanley would always have his back! He’ll help him! “Stanley, they’re gonna make me go away! Tell them I don’t have to go!”

“Make you go away?” Stan repeated and then looked up at the crowd and saw the time machine in Dipper’s hand. “Oh, don’t wanna go back to New Jersey, huh?”

“But G…” But Wendy covered Mabel’s hand before she could say anything else.

Stanford ignored the meanies behind him and gave Stan the saddest puppy-dog eyes he could muster. He could practically see his brother crumble. “I mean, I could never tell you no, Sixer…”

“Stanley,” Ford said as he put a hand on his shoulder. “I would like to speak to myself in private.”

Stanford didn’t know how to feel about that. His little fingers tightened ever so slightly on Stan’s jeans.

“Oh, sure.” Stan then snorted and added, “If you can let go of my leg.”

Ford chuckled and held out a hand to his younger self. “Come on. I want to show you something.”

Stanford still wasn’t sure. He looked into those deep brown eyes that matched his own, the same brown eyes he saw when he looked in the mirror. Or looked at his brother. Or his mother. Or Dipper or Mabel. Stanford glanced back at the other pair of twins, having a hunch, but he knew that there was only one person that was going to tell him what he needed to hear and wanted to hear in a certain way, so Stanford slowly let his brother go and took his own polydactyl hand.

Ford smiled and walked with the ten-year-old into the house alone. Stanford looked up at his older self and smiled. Ford caught this and chuckled. “Do I look as you had hoped?” He asked.

Stanford felt his cheeks get warm again, but he ignored it to talk to himself. Who else gets a chance to talk to themselves like this? “Did you get better at boxing?”

Ford laughed, knowing why Stanford asked that; the child was clearly happy he would grow up to be somewhat fit. “I did, actually. I’m still not as good as Stanley, but that’s okay. I actually kept fit from field research and travelling.”

“You’re an explorer?!” Stanford gasped.

“We’re an explorer.” Ford corrected. “We are with Stanley.”

“So,” Stanford felt more comfortable with Ford as they entered the gift shop, so he asked, “Where exactly are we?”

“This is our home. We built this place when we first moved here.” Ford explained as he stood in front of the vending machine. “It’s changed a lot, but so have we. Excuse me.” He let go of Stanford’s hand to click a button on his watch, making the vending machine open. Stanford gasped and Ford took his hand again.

“So robots don’t take over the world?”

“Not yet, anyways.”

“Do we ever get better at talking to girls?”

“Better? Yes. As good as we want to be? No.”

Stanford giggled at that. Maybe there was hope for him, after all. The odd pair went to the elevator, Ford typed in the code, and then they travelled down to the third floor.

Stanford gasped to find a bright, colorful lab. What used to be dark and dingy and dusty was now loud and bright and full of projects ready to be resumed now that Ford was home for the summer. Twinkle lights hung from the ceiling, pictures and books littered the desk, and a big window displayed a big work-room full of projects. The Electron Carpet was rolled up and on a wooden shelf, a motorcycle in the works was in the work-room, and the big machines were fizzing and blinking on either side of Stanford.

“This place is amazing!” He cheered with pure delight.

“Yeah, beats working in a boring office every day.” Ford chuckled. “The lights were Mabel’s idea. Says a workspace needs to be fun. Do you want to see what I’m most proud of?”

“Yes!” Stanford took off for the work-room, thinking Ford was going to show him a microprocessor, or a machine that would benefit all of man-kind, but inside the giant room he could hear Ford chuckling and he found his older self still in the lab.

“No no,” Ford patted his ribs. “It’s right here.”

Stanford raised an eyebrow, confused and hoping it wasn’t going to be a stupid metaphore (he never enjoyed poetry), but Ford pulled out a photograph and Stanford gently took it, thinking it was going to be an award ceremony or a monster or an invention that wasn’t in the lab anymore.

The boy was beyond surprised to find himself in the picture, standing on the broken Stan O’ War with Stanley. Stanford could remember when this picture was taken, it had only been last summer, and from what the boy could tell, this copy was very old and worn. Stanford looked up at Ford to find him smiling peacefully.

“It was our first real achievement, our first big project, and it will always be the one I’m most proud of because we did it with our brother.” Ford explained.

Stanford smiled at himself, but then it went away as he thought about it. He was really willing to leave Stanley behind for all of this. Sure, mostly because he believed Stanley would be better off without him, but how much of it really was just Stanford trying to hide the guilt of leaving his twin alone. “Is… Is Stanley mad at me?”

“Oh, no.” Ford quickly reassured. “When we send you back, it’ll be like you never left.”

Stanford looked back up at himself and saw the picture of someone who looked really similar by his shoulder. Ford noticed Stanford’s averted eyes and he moved to the side so Stanford could look at the picture on the desk. A boy that looked a lot like Stanford had two fingers up by a girl who also looked like him with braces and long hair. The boy was wearing Dipper’s hat.

Stanford took the framed photo and Ford chuckled. “Stanley’s right. The resemblance is uncanny.”

With the pictures of ten and twelve-year-old Dipper, Mabel, Stan and Ford all in front of Stanford, he swallowed and asked, “Dipper and Mabel aren’t just friends, huh?”

Ford chuckled and shook his head. “No. All those people upstairs are your family.”

“So… if I go back now, then all of this will be my future?” Stanford asked, his eyes moving around the room and staying up at the ceiling for a few moments.

“Well,” Ford put a hand on Stanford’s shoulder and said, “That depends on you, you got to make the right choices. But I know you will. Remember, I’m you. I was once a ten-year-old kid looking up at an older version of myself, being told the same thing. Time travel is confusing, but you’ll find what goes around comes around, so if I experienced this,” And Ford gestured to the boy in front of him. ”Then it’s extremely plausible you will experience this,” And Ford gestured to the old man he was.

Stanford grinned and gave himself the picture back and sat the framed photo on the desk. There was still one last thing on his mind. Stanford hesitated, took in a deep breath, and dared to ask, “Does that mean Stanley and I will always be best friends?”

Ford held his cleft chin, hummed to himself, and then said slowly to himself, “I think you better get back to your own time and find out for yourself.”

Stanford sinked in stature and admitted, “I knew you were gonna say that.”

Ford chuckled and offered his hand again. “That’s because we are one smart kid, Sixer.”

~~~~~~~~~~

When back up to face the family, Dipper gave Stanford the time machine and said, “Now, it’s already set to backwards, so just go back fifty-two years and you should land right at the second you came from.”

“Thanks.” Stanford accepted the tape measure and looked at Dipper and Mabel. “I’m… I’m really sorry I got mad…”

“Hey, that’s what family’s all about.” Mabel said, waving the apology away.

Stanford smiled and nodded, then figured he owed them a hug and gave them one. Dipper was surprised, but hugged back, meanwhile Mabel was tearing up and sniffing as she hugged Stanford back tightly.

“Are you crying, pumpkin?” Stan asked.

“I’m… I’m gonna miss him…”

“I’m right here!”

Everyone laughed as Stanford let the teenagers go. Wendy ruffled his hair and said, “Had fun with you today, Stan Two. Feel free to get yourself a pet dinosaur on the way home.”

Stanford snorted and saw Wendy hold out a hand to him, wanting a high-five. He hesitated, then smiled and gave her a well-earned high-six. He then turned to Soos and Melody and said, “Thanks for hiring me, Soos, and giving me a tour.”

“Aw, you’re welcome, Little Dr. Pines.” Soos said.

“Just be careful going home.” Melody advised. “Don’t let the time-cops catch you, don’t go anywhere else, don’t do anything you wouldn’t do…”

“Yeesh, you’re worse than Ma.” Stan teased.

“Yeah, about that…” But Soos was interrupted by his adoptive father.

“Now move it, you knucklehead.” Stan said as it was almost dark outside. “Quit moping around too, it’s not like you're never gonna see us again. We’re your family!”

Stanford smiled and nodded. “Thanks, Stanley. See you earlier.”

“Love you, little brother.” And Stan punched Ford’s shoulder as he laughed.

“Yes, yes, enjoy it while you can.” Ford commented as he rolled his eyes, and Stanford pulled back the tape and released.

The second his ten-year-old self was gone, Ford held out a hand to Stan and clenched it a few times until his twin grumpily forked over some cash.

~~~~~~~~~~

January 1960-something

Just like Dipper said, Stanford was right where he was before he disappeared. He checked the clock in the window of a bakery and saw that no time had passed. He sat the time machine down for the owner to find and raced home, excited to tell Stanley everything.

But when bedtime came and Stanford was above Stanley and sharing his adventure, Stanley only said, “Wow, great story, Sixer!”

“It’s not just a story, Stanley, it’s real!” Stanford insisted. “It actually happened! Don’t you believe me?”

“A future in which you’re more fit than me?” Stanley clarified and blew a raspberry. “I bet you five bucks it never happens.”

Stanford grinned, knowing he was destined to win. “You’re on.”

#GF #fanfiction #meet the pines #meet the robinsons #gift #thank you so much for reading!#remember that bitches love comments

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blackfemmecharacterdependency · 3 years

Text

Share a Lair 03 || Somebunny’s in the Holiday Spirit

Charlotte had gifts, decorations, and stockings in the trunk of her car. She pulled into the driveway near the tower entrance and texted Henry to meet her outside and help her with boxes. Max had already sent an email to their lab that under no circumstances were they to do anything “Chrismasy” in the shared space.

After being approved as a guest, Charlotte tried to be mindful of the roommate’s wishes. Henry and Jasper were on the “we pay rent here too” side of the issue. Neither of them actually DID pay rent, really. Jasper’s checks came from Junk N Stuff, and didn’t go into this place ever, at all. Meanwhile Charlotte received 2 checks - one from Junk N Stuff and one from S.A.L. Inc… because whenever she worked from the lab in the shared lair, she got a check for that. Share a Lair was a little bit more organized than the Man Cave. Henry was making Kid Danger money, but his rent was paid in successful missions by S.A.L. Inc.

Share A Lair was to help heroes get out on their own, so as long as they were working, they had a place to stay, basically for free. If they worked like Max did… nearly everything was free. Max hadn’t had to foot a bill of any sort since he was there.

Charlotte tried to explain to Henry that if he had a different roommate, some of their amenities might skip at times. In essence, to be grateful that Max Thunderman was his roommate, because Max always had high end assignments and those meant more resources in the lair and less that Henry had to contribute to the lair.

The least they could do was respect his wishes about shared space. So, she kept the decorations limited to the tower and Henry’s lab. But, she also didn’t want to leave him out completely. After everything was set up, she went to the shared space with one of her hand made Christmas stockings and a gift, which she wrapped and labeled “From Your Lairmates,” then simply left outside of the door to his section of the house. She turned around and almost bumped into Max, but he stopped her with his hands on her arms and she yelped in surprise. He smiled and let go of her. “What are you doing sneaking around my lair?” He wasn’t in his uniform, but she could tell that he had been working. He had a certain “after mission” look to him. Kinda sweaty and tired, but skin still glowing and hair probably made perfect again immediately following battle.

She huffed out a breath and said, “I was leaving your stocking and present that we got you.”

“We, or you?” He wondered, reaching down on the floor for the items.

“I mean, I’m the one who actually physically knitted and filled the stocking and shopped for and wrapped the gift, but it’s from the three of us.”

“You’re the only one who works, of the three,” he noted. She was going to debate that, but he had a point, and he started talking again anyway, “Well, I’m not really a Christmas kinda guy. I do stuff with my family, for their benefit, and that’s about it, but thanks anyway.” He tried to hand her back the gifts, but she stepped back to avoid them.

“You touched it last. Yours now,” she said and headed back for the tower. Max rolled his eyes, sighed and watched her leave. He went into his chambers, secretly giddy and curious what she’d gotten him. He did a little dance as soon as she was out of sight and rocked his head from side to side in excitement.

First off, inside of the stocking were some very nice mini hair supplies - organic stuff with honey, lavender and vanilla. She complimented his hair a few times and he noticed that she had began following all of his social media platforms and often liked photos where he knew that his swoosh was IT.

Then, there were a few gadgets that he wasn’t familiar with and he wondered if she maybe made them herself. 1. A flexible compact mirror that could attach to your hand to be held in your palm without actually holding it - it bent with the movements of his hand, but returned to a flat surface when he looked at himself again. 2. A device that claimed to be a patch that helped glands with odor… He didn’t know how he felt about THAT, but he was a heavy sweater and tended to get smelly easily when he had to fight, so she’d probably gotten a whiff of that a time or two in the past few weeks. That troubled him. He’d have to be sure to be fresh and clean whenever he saw her next. In fact, he sniffed his arm pit and grunted. WHY? Maybe it WAS his glands. 3. A safety detector. This one claimed to be able to program up to a dozen people’s vitals into it and always be able to check and see that they were okay. He smiled. That could be a HUGE comfort while he was away on missions… But also… She had treats in there! He effing LOVED treats.

Fudge square Rudolph, snowflake shaped peppermint bark, large snowman sugar cookie, chocolate Black Santa cupcake… They were goofy, but wound up being super delicious. He felt bad, not because he stuffed his face and went into the kitchen after his shower to gorge himself on every treat that he could find in the place.. He KNEW that she’d been the one to do all of this and he hadn’t even considered getting any of them anything…

Max rushed into his parents’ house and jetted by Phoebe and their parents on the couch.

“Well, hello to you too!” Phoebe teased.

“Can it, Pheebs. I’ve gotta find a Christmas present for my… roommate’s assistant…” he heard himself as he said it and knew it sounded silly. He went into the lair in the basement, anyway. Phoebe followed.

“So… finally ready to admit that you’ve got a crush on Charlotte?” She teased.

“What? Never. I’m just pressed for time and was given a gift last night.”

“What was the gift?” Phoebe wondered.

“I don’t know, Phoebe. Christmas hasn’t happened yet.” He opened a vault and grabbed out a bunny, “Oh! What about this? A woman would like this, right?”

“A stuffed bunny? I guess. Not necessarily for Christmas, but…”

“This isn’t a stuffed bunny. Know what, I don’t need your help. You don’t even know her.”

“Excuse me? We met for coffee three times since I saw her at your place.”

He set the bunny down and tried to look casual. “She say anything about me?”

“That you’re a cocky know-it-all.” He frowned and picked the bunny back up, “I don’t have time for this. I need to make adjustments on this thing and make it more suitable for her.”

“Good luck with your crush!” She cheered as he made his exit.

“Good luck with your pores!” He called back.

She gasped and touched her face, then said, “He’s psyching you out. Your pores are excellent.”

This was Henry’s first Christmas out of his parents’ house. The tree that he and Jasper put up and decorated had only a few gifts under them that they opened on Christmas morning. The three friends were opening things whenever Charlotte heard the call beep from the two way lab screen and went to answer it.

Max was there, with bedhead… though she couldn’t tell if that was natural or forced. Still extremely cute, though. “Merry Christmas, Max!” She cheered. He fought a smile. She was SO STINKIN’ CUTE in an elf suit onesie, with a hat and brown elf ears, holiday paint on her face, and red and green glitter in her hair. She watched him curiously as he stared at her, then when her smile began to awkwardly fade, he remembered where he was.

“Hey. I’m gonna send your gift through the chute,” he said.

“Oh, you didn’t have to rush some gift. We didn’t get you something so that you could get us something.”

“I didn’t get “us” something, I’m giving you something. It’s coming through the chute,” he repeated and pressed the button. Charlotte opened the chute and it was a large plastic chest with padding and a wrapped present inside of it. She opened the chest and got the box out. “Wanna open at the same time?” Max wondered.

She looked up and saw that he had the present that she left for him. She was surprised that he hadn’t opened it yet and just hoped that whatever he got her wasn’t going to put what she got him to shame. She nodded and they both tore into their presents, like little kids, smiling and then taking a moment to examine what they were looking at. “OH MY GOD!” She squealed. “Is this one of your ingenious gadgets?” she wondered.

Henry and Jasper came over to investigate as Max proudly answered, “Yeah. It’s not exactly new, but I thought that you could appreciate it. I call it the Productivity Pet. It’s basically like a little minion, to help you complete your tasks, since you’re the only person over there that ever actually does any work.”

Henry scoffed, “I do work! I do superhero work!” He said.

He was ignored. “Awww, Thanks, Max! Well… Hopefully, you don’t hate what I got you, then. You’re not very easy to shop for, because as far as I know, you either have or create everything that you could possibly need! But, I didn’t find any indication that you had one of these bad boys.”

“It looks like a mini food replicator?” He tried guessing.

“Accurate!” she cheered, “Well, sort of. It’s a portable auto snacker with about a thousand desserts programmed into it. I heard you liked sweets.”

“Where’d you hear that?” Max asked, only slightly distracted from the fact that he was about to eat about 50 lbs of sweets from that thing, “And also, did you use this to make the desserts that were in my stocking?”

“I didn’t, but you can bet that I programmed the recipes into it.”

He hugged it to his chest, “I’m not sure why I HAVEN’T made myself one of these!”

“Happy Christmas, Max!” Jasper cheered.

Max winced a smile and said, “You too.”

Charlotte picked up her Productivity Pet, which was in the form of a brown bunny with a puffy tail and grabbed the instructions. She forgot to shut off the screen, mainly because Max usually did that, and so he watched her go with her friends and study her gift. He heard Henry ask her, “Why didn’t he get US a present?”

“You’ll have to ask him,” she said, but she couldn’t stop smiling. Max annoyed her at times, being cocky and kinda rude, but she now thought that there was someone softer in there. She had no idea that he was having trouble leaving the screen, because he could still see her admiring her gift across the room.

Charlotte had gotten jewelry from Jasper, some e book collections from Henry, a ton of great stuff from her family, a weird hat from Schwoz, and a photo of Ray from Ray. The only thing that she was actively using was the Productivity Pet, which she had began calling Penelope. She also had given her bunny clothes that she made, programmed a ton of stuff into her database and carried her around in a small pet carrier. Henry and Jasper made fun of her for it, but this bunny was one of the best things to ever happen to her. She was basically a little smart device that looked like a bunny! And Charlotte was able to put her in little flower crowns and do numerous things with her. She was a diffuser, an ambient light, a calendar, could make calls, download media - Charlotte had her reading the books that Henry bought her as she worked. She could access all of Charlotte’s social media, AND she was a projector, so Charlotte could use her in a similar fashion as the Whiz Watch.

She was on Henry’s couch with Penelope on her lap, reading her a story, while she worked on some homework for one of her courses and waited on Henry to return from an assignment when she heard moving around in Max’s lab. They must’ve left the comm open on the 2 way caller.

Who knows how much power was probably wasted? She went to turn it off, with her bunny tucked cozily beneath her arm like a pillow, and saw that Max had two bunnies of his own, moving around in the lab. That probably was NOT safe. She was going to press the emergency button to alert him, but he came in before she could and fussed, “Colosso! Balfour! What are you two doing here?”

“What did you do with Bunny Clyde?” One of the rabbits asked.

“Ugh. I gave her away. She was just sitting in a vault anyway.”

“You think I hadn’t been in and out of that vault?” The one called Colosso asked.

“You broke up a happy home!” The one called Balfour fussed.

“This is SO weird.” Charlotte said, and they turned to look at her.

“Oh God, "Max said.

"Bunny Clyde!” The rabbits cheered.

“Sorry. Ignore this! I mean, ignore what? There are no bunnies!” Max said and turned off the screen.

“And it got weirder.” She pressed her luck and went to his lab, where he was vigorously fussing with two rabbits while she waited for access. Nobody just walked in there. What if there were protocols in place? He sighed and granted her entry.

“Hey.. How many of these do you have?” She wondered.

“We are not the same!” Colosso said, indignantly. “But, she is the only lady bunny that I ever get to see.”

“She’s not REAL, Dr. Colosso!” Max said, exhausted.

“Wait.. these are REAL RABBITS???” Charlotte asked, wide eyes and super intrigued. “Did you TEACH them to talk, or was a device involved?”

God, he wished he could take credit for this. But, he couldn’t, and anyways, Balfour said, “We were humans. We’re now imprisoned in bunny bodies by The Thundermans and this one, the WORSE Thunderman of all, took away our Bunny Clyde to give to his stupid new crush."

"Hey!” Charlotte and Max both said. But next she said, “I’m not stupid,” while Max had said, “She’s not my crush!” Then they looked at each other and said, “Or what he/she said."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. The LEAST you could do is set up playdates!” Colosso insisted.

“Okay… I guess my fake bunny could have playdates with your real bunnies that are actually villains is bunny body prisons. Starting now. I need… a strong tea.” She handed Penelope to Max and left the lab.

“Ugh. Look what you’ve done. She thinks we’re weirdos!” Max complained.

“Who needs her?” Colosso asked. Max just fumed and sat Penelope down on the table. She was still reading Charlotte’s story.

Whenever Charlotte came back to get her, Max explained, “He gets lonely and used to have stuffed animal friends sometimes. I made her to help him out, but whenever he got his son, I figured that he didn’t need her anymore.”

“I understand if you need to keep her,” she lied.

“No. She’s yours now…”

“Oh thank God, she is literally the best gift that I’ve ever gotten!” She cheered, accepting her back. He smiled brightly. That was literally the best compliment that he had ever gotten. I think I’m starting to like this girl, he thought. It sounded vaguely familiar in his mind. Like he’d felt this way before. Oh shit. This was how he felt when he first really saw Allison. He liked Charlotte. Ugh. He did have a crush. He had just admitted it to himself. Phoebe was right. He watched Charlotte smiling at her bunny as she held a paw up and waved it at Max on her way out. Oh well, he thought, with a goofy grin as he waved back to a robot bunny.

#Share a Lair #Henry Danger #The Thundermans #crossover #crossover fanfic #Nesha Crossover #Thundanger #Thunderbolt #Share a Lair Repost #Nesha HD Fanfic #fanfiction

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angryrabbit42 · 4 years

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Loyalty, Bravery, & Owls

A Harry Potter AU for @skywokers @dwsecretsanta Better late than never, Merry Christmas!

Amelia Pond received her letter to Hogwarts out of the blue. She was living a normal life in Leadworth with her best friend Rory. Nothing interesting ever happened there until the letter. Well, almost nothing interesting. Once when Amelia was eight, she spotted a man appearing out of nowhere in her back garden.

He had been in black trousers, a button-down shirt, bowtie, suspenders and on his head was a bright red fez. Amelia had laughed at the man and he’d pointed a stick in her direction. “Oblivi---hang on, you seem a bit magical. Are you...magical?”

“No. I’m ordinary.”

The man put his stick away and knelt down beside her. His brown hair was a bit messy and floppy and he had a bit of a chin but his big green eyes were friendly. “What’s your name?”

“Amelia Pond,” Amelia Pond responded and sketched a terrible curtsy. Her aunt was always going on about manners. Amelia thought it was all rubbish but not right now. Now the curtsy seemed right.

“That’s not a real name!” he barked. “Unless you’re a heroine in a fairy story?”

“No, I don’t think so,” she told him annoyed. “And it is too a real name. Friends call me Amy.”

“Well, then Amy. I bet you will be extraordinary. Keep an eye on the owls.” He tapped her nose. “The owls aren’t ordinary. Not around here anyhow. I’ve been looking for a particular one for ages.”

Amy frowned as the man stood up and searched the trees. “Owls aren’t extraordinary.”

“Why not?” he asked pulling his stick and waving it about. Green light sparkled at the tip and a few stray sparks escaped it.

“Because they’re owls,” she told him as if he were extraordinarily stupid.

The man puffed out a breath. “You’re a tough nut to crack Amelia Pond. Well,” he slapped his knees, “I’m off. The owls here are not the owl I’m hunting. That one there is a bit shifty… Anyway, I’m off. Lovely to meet you.” The man pumped her hand in a grownup’s handshake and tipped his fez to her.

“Wait,” Amy called but the man half turned in a circle and was gone.

Now Amelia Pond had a letter. She was magical. And she was going to Hogwarts. She raced next door to tell Rory. Rory was her best friend. He had been the only one who hadn’t laughed when she became obsessed with owls. He had helped her. He had even bought her a book on owls for her tenth birthday. She hoped he had a letter, so they could go to school together. He didn’t.

“Why not?” Amy demanded.

“I don’t know!” Rory shouted, crying. He knew what Hogwarts was all about. “My parents are a witch and a wizard. I should be going! Maybe I’m a squib. I’ll miss you, Amy.”

Amy glared and stomped her foot. “No, you will not be sorry Rory Williams. You will go with me.”

“How?” Rory asked.

“Can you fit in a big trunk?”

Amy let Rory out of the trunk as soon as they were safely in a cabin on the Hogwarts Express. Rory shook with nerves. “They’re going to find me, Amy. They’ll make me go home.”

Stubbornly, Amy growled, “We stick together. You’re just a late bloomer.”

“What if I’m a never bloomer? The sorting hat will know, Amy. This is dangerous. They could take away all my memories or worse, let me keep them,” he said sadly. Amy took his hand and squeezed.

A redhaired teacher slipped into the room and sat across from them. “You’re a Williams’ yeah? You look like your mom,” she asked as she flopped down on an open seat.

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Oh, stuff all that,” the teacher said, fussing with her blue robes. She also had a long scarf wrapped around her neck. “Professor Noble, magical zoology, and a bit of auror work on the side with my brother John. He’s a skinny stick with fluffy brown hair. He teaches transmogrification and sometimes juggling.”

Amy gawped. “I want to juggle.”

“Right,” Professor Noble said, eying her up. “Bet you’re another Gryffindor. Like me. Like my brother… Williams here will be a Hufflepuff, I’ll wager you two pumpkin pasties each. “Course as a teacher, I’m beyond such things.”

“What do you know about the owls?” Amy asked and Rory groaned.

Professor Noble sat up, suddenly stern. “What does a first-year know about the owls?”

Amy shrugged. “A guy appeared in my back garden once. Seemed keen on finding a particular owl. He was sort of weird with a fez.”

She barked out a laugh, “The headmaster was in your back garden? Hunting an owl? Oh, that is rich! Well, little proto-Gryffindor, there are a few rogue owls. They’re wreaking havoc on the mail. Real pain in our ar--”

“Donna!” A thin man in a pinstriped suit appeared in the doorway. “I’ve managed to light a very small part, a very inconsequential part of the train on fire. Hi kids, bet that one’s a Gryffindor, eh?” he asked, pointing to Amy. “What with the red hair and all. You a Weasley?”

“You are the worst! The literal worst. You’re a professor for heaven’s sake! Come on matchstick, let’s go save the train. See you at the sorting kids.” Professor Noble breezed out of the cabin taking her brother along by the ear.

The rest of the train ride passed in relative peace with children popping by to discuss the cakes, chocolate frogs, familiars, and a few of them looked upset when Amy mentioned wanting an owl. Rory leaned over and explained, “They’re not popular right now. The rogue ones are also spies sometimes for the other side, for the death eaters.”

“Why did you wait until now to tell me that?”

“Couldn’t risk the Ministry of Magic knowing that you knew about magic. Muggles aren’t allowed. I’m not allowed. I didn’t get a letter,” he said the last in a harsh whisper.

“No one has said anything.” Amy looked around. “Once you’re in the castle, they’ll have to let you stay.”

“I hope so.” Rory mangled his school robes. They were old and patched. He had stolen them from his father’s old school trunk along with his father’s student wand. Amy had her own wand, a shiny new one from Olivander’s.

“Can you do magic?”

Rory pulled out his dull, ancient want. “I’m not sure. Should I try?”

“No. We need to lie low.”

The rolling hills gave way to the dark underground cavern. The kids were separated into groups. Amy held tight to Rory’s hand as they climbed into a boat with a tall gangly girl with natural hair and a digital camera. “This is amazing! I got to document all of this. So much better than regular school, right?”

Amy nodded. Pale-faced, Rory also nodded. They made it across the lake with a large mountain man giving them a speech about… well, Amy didn’t listen. She’d ask Rory later. They touched down at an honest to goodness big gothic castle. Rory was shivering in terror. “They’re going to know, Amy. They’re going to know.”

Amy pulled Rory away from the crowd. The two of them hid behind a pillar. “Shut up. If you pretend you belong, and the hat says okay, you’re in, right? That’s what the kids on the train said. We get sorted and then we go to the houses. You get sorted and you’re in. They can’t take it back. So toughen up, Rory! I don’t want to do this without you! Don’t make me go to magic school alone.”

“I-I don’t want you to be alone.” He bowed his head. “I’ll try.”

Amy pulled him into a tight hug. “You’re my best friend in the whole world, no universe!”

“Ah, Amelia Pond, erm, Amy, sorry, it’s been a hot minute,” said a voice Amy only half-remembered. The children spun to face the man with his suspenders, a bright shiny purple bowtie this time and a long purple coat over a white button-down. Annoyingly, he was still wearing the fez. “And… who’s your friend?”

Rory trembled like a leaf.

“Rory Williams, his family is always in Hufflepuff,” Amy said, faking a cheerful tone.

“Hm,” the man said, peering intently at Rory. He pulled a pair of round, maroon spectacles from his pocket and stared at the air around him. “Yes, Brian’s your da, isn’t he?”

“Yessir, yes, Brian is my da.” Rory answered proudly.

The man advanced on Rory and poked him in the chest. “You tell Brian, that that dinosaur ruined my favorite tweed jacket. And I will never forget… how cool that was.” He backed off, crossing his arms and leaned against a pillar.

“You’re Headmaster Smith!” Rory exclaimed, “Professor Noble was talking about you.”

“Oh, was she? Did she call me a rude word? She always calls me rude words. We’re cousins. Ignore her. Anyhow, why aren’t you in the line to be sorted, Williams? Pond? Time to see where you belong… unless?”

“Unless?” Amy asked.

“Unless you’d like to help me find a bad owl,” he offered, green eyes boring into Rory.

Amy was terrified for Rory. What if the headmaster knew he didn’t belong? “Both of us?” she asked.

“Yeah, yes, of course, Rory would you like to hunt a bad owl? He’s gone a bit rogue. I followed him into the owlery but he skittered out into the dark forest. Could be dangerous. Monsters in the woods. Big ones. Want to see ‘em? Catch an owl?”

“Yes?” Rory’s eyes kept shifting between them. Amy grabbed his hand and held on tight.

The headmaster noticed, arching a delicate brow. “Well done!” He clapped his hands then rubbed them together. “Let’s go!”

The headmaster, who very quickly made them call him Doctor instead of Headmaster which he thought was stuffy and stupid and something you called a person over 1500. Amy let him ramble, holding tight to Rory as they followed a dirt trail down and down and down into a pitch black wood full of trees the size of skyscrapers.

“Wands up,” the Doctor announced. They scrambled to match him. “Repeat after me, ‘LUMOS.’

“Lumos!” Amy said. The tip of her wand lit up with a warm soft glow.

Rory was hesitant, staring at his wand in terror. The Doctor arched both brows. “Come along Williams. ‘Lumos.’”

“Lumos?” The wand sputtered but did not light. Rory’s face turned beet red.

“Again, more conviction,” the Doctor encouraged.

“LUMOS!” Rory shouted and his want lit up golden and bright.

The Doctor’s grin was bright and catlike. “Well done. Probably announced our presence to everything in the wood that eats us, but eh, worth it for the pretty warm light, isn’t it?”

Rory stared at his wand in wonder until he was almost left behind. The Doctor set a brisk pace. Every few meters he would make a sound like a wounded animal. Birds would echo him. Amy swept her wand back and forth. Eyes glowed in reflected light. Things shuffled in the dark. She gripped Rory’s hand until he yelped a bit.

Something swooped past them. Rory and the Doctor raised their wands. A great tawny owl strafed them. Its eyes glowed red. The Doctor shot a chartreuse beam of light out of his wand. “Immobulus!”

The owl was suspended. Amy reached out and she could touch the tail feathers. Rory hung back, trying to pull her back to safety. She could see something in its claws. The Doctor used his wand to lower the bird to the ground. He took what was in its claws and slipped it into a pocket. He whispered something and the owl shrank back down into an egg. Scooping it up, he stuffed it into a pocket and beamed at her. “Well done.”

“We didn’t do anything,” Rory said.

“You cast a perfect lighting spell,” the Doctor corrected. “It helped me find what I needed. And you did that by following a stranger into a deadly wood. If that’s not brave, I don’t know brave. C’mon, let’s catch the end of the sorting.”

Rory stepped forward. “Um, Headmaster, erm, Doctor, I can’t go to the sorting.”

“Whyever not?” he asked, eyes boring into Rory. “Don’t you want to go to Hogwarts with your friend Amelia?”

“More than anything.” he gushed and Amy squeezed his fingers. “But I didn’t get a letter.”

“Well, that’s unfortunate. I suppose I’ll take you home then. Take my hand. I’ll have to remove all your memories of this place,” he said sadly. “But, the best part of a memory wipe is that you won’t remember what you forgot. It’s a great way to not be sad.” The Doctor looked sad but also sly and it made Amy mad.

“No.”

“No?” the Doctor asked.

“No! Rory is brave! And he’s smart! And he did your spell! He’s magical! You saw that a minute ago. He shouldn’t have to go home because he didn’t get a stupid letter! What if it got lost? Then he never gets to go to magic school!? If that’s your system then it stinks! Rory is my best friend and he deserves to go to Hogwarts! And if he can’t, well you can take me home too. I don’t want to be anywhere that doesn’t think he’s good enough!” She stomped her foot.

“Okay,” the Doctor responded.

“Okay? Okay, Rory can come?” Amy demanded.

“Yeah, okay,” the Doctor agreed. “You’re right. Rory is brave and loyal, and magical. He belongs here with us. And if a letter is all that’s preventing him from getting in, then the system is stupid and wrong.”

“The system is stupid and wrong,” Rory growled.

“No it isn’t,” the Doctor argued.

“You just said…” Rory floundered.

“I said if you didn’t get a letter, but you did. You and ten other unlucky hopefuls.” He pulled the packet from his pockets. “I’ve suspected for a long time that some of our letters weren’t getting delivered. Now I have proof. The ministry will have to listen to me now, thanks in part to you two. Well done!” The Doctor pulled a letter from his pocket and offered it to Rory. “I would have let you in either way,” the Doctor said. “I’m a Hufflepuff and loyalty is our best trait and you have it to spare, Rory Williams.”

Rory beamed.

“Wait, what? I do too,” Amy growled.

“Yeah, but you’re a Gryffindor. I can smell it on you. If it weren’t for this one, you’d be a Slytherin. Now go on up to the castle and prove me right. Follow the path. Touch the fifth brick and whisper, ‘Yogurt is just stuff with bits in.’ The wall will let you directly into the hall. Go on. I’m sure we’ll all be great friends.”

He beamed and vanished.

Amy was a Gryffindor. The hat barely touched her head before she was among all the other redheads. Rory got Hufflepuff. They were in separate houses but never separate from each other.

The end.

#dwsecretsanta #amy and rory #amy pond #Harry Potter #AU #Rory Williams #eleventh doctor

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neshabeingchildish · 4 years

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Somebunny's in the Holiday Spirit

Share-a-Lair 03

Okay... If you’re not here for Thunderbolt, I fear that I have wasted your time for a couple of chapters and I sincerely apologize, because it looks like that’s the bulk of what is happening here. We’ll see a little Hensper sprinkled in, but Thunderbolt has taken over both my life and more directly, this story. So, Thunderbolt Thots Assemble! @adorkable-blackgirl @chenoahchantel @kiddangers (This is a Christmas chapter that i didn’t finish until today. Hopefully the NYE one won’t take as long.

After being approved as a guest, Charlotte tried to be mindful of the roommate's wishes. Henry and Jasper were on the "we pay rent here too" side of the issue. Neither of them actually DID pay rent, really. Jasper's checks came from Junk N Stuff, and didn’t go into this place ever, at all. Meanwhile Charlotte received 2 checks - one from Junk N Stuff and one from S.A.L. Inc… because whenever she worked from the lab in the shared lair, she got a check for that. Share a Lair was a little bit more organized than the Man Cave. Henry was making Kid Danger money, but his rent was paid in successful missions by S.A.L. Inc.

Share A Lair was to help heroes get out on their own, so as long as they were working, they had a place to stay, basically for free. If they worked like Max did… nearly everything was free. Max hadn't had to foot a bill of any sort since he was there.

The least they could do was respect his wishes about shared space. So, she kept the decorations limited to the tower and Henry's lab. But, she also didn't want to leave him out completely. After everything was set up, she went to the shared space with one of her hand made Christmas stockings and a gift, which she wrapped and labeled “From Your Lairmates,” then simply left outside of the door to his section of the house. She turned around and almost bumped into Max, but he stopped her with his hands on her arms and she yelped in surprise. He smiled and let go of her. “What are you doing sneaking around my lair?” He wasn’t in his uniform, but she could tell that he had been working. He had a certain “after mission” look to him. Kinda sweaty and tired, but skin still glowing and hair probably made perfect again immediately following battle.

She huffed out a breath and said, “I was leaving your stocking and present that we got you.”

“We, or you?” He wondered, reaching down on the floor for the items.

“I mean, I’m the one who actually physically knitted and filled the stocking and shopped for and wrapped the gift, but it’s from the three of us.”

“You're the only one who works, of the three,” he noted. She was going to debate that, but he had a point, and he started talking again anyway, “Well, I’m not really a Christmas kinda guy. I do stuff with my family, for their benefit, and that’s about it, but thanks anyway.” He tried to hand her back the gifts, but she stepped back to avoid them.

Fudge square Rudolph, snowflake shaped peppermint bark, large snowman sugar cookie, chocolate Black santa cupcake… They were goofy, but wound up being super delicious. He felt bad, not because he stuffed his face and went into the kitchen after his shower to gorge himself on every treat that he could find in the place.. He KNEW that she’d been the one to do all of this and he hadn’t even considered getting any of them anything…

Max rushed into his parents' house and jetted by Phoebe and their parents on the couch.

"Well, hello to you too!" Phoebe teased.

"Can it, Pheebs. I've gotta find a Christmas present for my… roommate's assistant…" he heard himself as he said it and knew it sounded silly. He went into the lair in the basement, anyway. Phoebe followed.

"So… finally ready to admit that you've got a crush on Charlotte?" She teased.

"What? Never. I'm just pressed for time and was given a gift last night."

"What was the gift?" Phoebe wondered.

"I don't know, Phoebe. Christmas hasn't happened yet." He opened a vault and grabbed out a bunny, "Oh! What about this? A woman would like this, right?"

"A stuffed bunny? I guess. Not necessarily for Christmas, but…"

"This isn't a stuffed bunny. Know what, I don't need your help. You don't even know her."

"Excuse me? We met for coffee three times since I saw her at your place."

He set the bunny down and tried to look casual. "She say anything about me?"

"That you're a cocky know-it-all." He frowned and picked the bunny back up, "I don't have time for this. I need to make adjustments on this thing and make it more suitable for her."

"Good luck with your crush!" She cheered as he made his exit.

"Good luck with your pores!" He called back.

She gasped and touched her face, then said, "He's psyching you out. Your pores are excellent."

This was Henry's first Christmas out of his parents' house. The tree that he and Jasper put up and decorated had only a few gifts under them that they opened on Christmas morning. The three friends were opening things whenever Charlotte heard the call beep from the two way lab screen and went to answer it.

“Hey. I’m gonna send your gift through the chute,” he said.

“Oh, you didn’t have to rush some gift. We didn’t get you something so that you could get us something.”

Henry scoffed, “I do work! I do superhero work!” He said.

“It looks like a mini food replicator?” He tried guessing.

“Accurate!” she cheered, “Well, sort of. It’s a portable auto snacker with about a thousand desserts programmed into it. I heard you liked sweets.”

“I didn’t, but you can bet that I programmed the recipes into it.”

He hugged it to his chest, “I’m not sure why I HAVEN’T made myself one of these!”

“Happy Christmas, Max!” Jasper cheered.

Max winced a smile and said, “You too.”

"What did you do with Bunny Clyde?" One of the rabbits asked.

"Ugh. I gave her away. She was just sitting in a vault anyway."

"You think I hadn't been in and out of that vault?" The one called Colosso asked.

"You broke up a happy home!" The one called Balfour fussed.

"This is SO weird." Charlotte said, and they turned to look at her.

"Oh God,"Max said.

"Bunny Clyde!" The rabbits cheered.

"Sorry. Ignore this! I mean, ignore what? There are no bunnies!" Max said and turned off the screen.

"And it got weirder." She pressed her luck and went to his lab, where he was vigorously fussing with two rabbits while she waited for access. Nobody just walked in there. What if there were protocols in place? He sighed and granted her entry.

"Hey.. How many of these do you have?" She wondered.

"We are not the same!" Colosso said, indignantly. "But, she is the only lady bunny that I ever get to see."

"She's not REAL, Dr. Colosso!" Max said, exhausted.

"Wait.. these are REAL RABBITS???" Charlotte asked, wide eyes and super intrigued. "Did you TEACH them to talk, or was a device involved?"

God, he wished he could take credit for this. But, he couldn't, and anyways, Balfour said, "We were humans. We're now imprisoned in bunny bodies by The Thundermans and this one, the WORSE Thunderman of all, took away our Bunny Clyde to give to his stupid new crush."

"Hey!" Charlotte and Max both said. But next she said, "I'm not stupid," while Max had said, "She's not my crush!" Then they looked at each other and said, "Or what he/she said."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. The LEAST you could do is set up playdates!" Colosso insisted.

"Okay… I guess my fake bunny could have playdates with your real bunnies that are actually villains is bunny body prisons. Starting now. I need… a strong tea." She handed Penelope to Max and left the lab.

"Ugh. Look what you've done. She thinks we're weirdos!" Max complained.

"Who needs her?" Colosso asked. Max just fumed and sat Penelope down on the table. She was still reading Charlotte's story.

Whenever Charlotte came back to get her, Max explained, "He gets lonely and used to have stuffed animal friends sometimes. I made her to help him out, but whenever he got his son, I figured that he didn't need her anymore."

"I understand if you need to keep her," she lied.

"No. She's yours now…"

"Oh thank God, she is literally the best gift that I've ever gotten!" She cheered, accepting her back. He smiled brightly. That was literally the best compliment that he had ever gotten. I think I’m starting to like this girl, he thought. It sounded vaguely familiar in his mind. Like he’d felt this way before. Oh shit. This was how he felt when he first really saw Allison. He liked Charlotte. Ugh. He did have a crush. He had just admitted it to himself. Phoebe was right. He watched Charlotte smiling at her bunny as she held a paw up and waved it at Max on her way out. Oh well, he thought, with a goofy grin as he waved back to a robot bunny.

#Share a Lair #henry danger #the thundermans #crossover #crossover fanfic #Nesha Crossover #Thundanger #Thunderbolt

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tea-and-toblerones · 6 years

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The One Where Ed Goes Caroling | A One Shot

Merry Christmas Eve Eve everyone! Have yourselves a fluffy little fic!

You were in full Christmas mode. Christmas music playing in the background, the smell of a snowy pine forest filling your home due to the balsam pine candles you had placed all around. You had drug out the two large boxes of Christmas decorations, fully prepared for a fun and festive day. You had spent a good hunk of the previous day with Ed, picking out the “perfect” tree. It was this slightly scraggly looking tree with two large bare patches that Ed just had to get.

“Come on baby, let’s get this one. Sure it’s a little wonky, but it’s got character and charm. It’s trying its best to bring cheer to someone’s family.” He climbed into it, gently grabbing a couple limbs. “I’ll look just as pretty as the rest of them with double the heart!” is voice a high and cartoony one. His face peeking through the limb with the most crooked smile. Little bits of snow and pine needles sticking in his hair as he waved the limbs about in some sort of weird type of dance.

You had been all around the lot, looking over every type of tree they had, but your eyes kept going back to that little tree that leaned slightly to the left. As you looked at it, Ed whispered in you ear “Please, take me home, I’m cold.”

When you pointed it out to the lot attendant, they made the comment that they were getting ready to throw it into the chipper because no one wanted it. That little satisfied smile on his face as he strapped it down to the car was worth it.

It was perfectly imperfect and honestly, you couldn’t see yourself with any other tree. It brought a smile to your face everytime you walked by it, Ed’s high pitched voice echoing in your head. You had decided to do do the outside decorations first, which Ed had already started on. You pull the door open, calling him inside for a break.

You had to admit, him on a ladder made you slightly nervous. The boy could stumble over flat ground with ease. So ladders and slick surfaces seemed like his natural enemy, the sound of his feet stamping off the excess snow off his boots told you he made it safely to the ground.

He had bundled up, a black beanie that was coated in rapidly melting snowflakes. The ones that clung to the curly copper locks that peaked out from under the toboggan melted slower, glimmering like crystals. His cheeks under his scruff was pink from the cold air. His fingers were a dark red as he flexed them, trying to work feeling back into them. He had refused to wear gloves saying he couldn’t feel anything with them on. He picked a red and black flannel, pairing it with a tan vest. The interior lined with white fluffy cotton like substance that was surprisingly warm. You could hear him sniffling, the sudden change of temperature causing his nose to run.

“Well, I’ve got all the lights up on the house. Just have the lawn deer and lights on the rails left.” he pulled the toboggan off his head, his hands ruffling his hair in an attempt to tame the static charged flyaways.

You drop a couple handfuls of marshmallows in each mug of hot chocolate, topping it off with a sprinkle of cinnamon and a candy cane to stir it with. He takes the offered cup gratefully, letting the mug warm his chilled fingers.

“Why don’t you call it a day with the lights? It’s starting to get a bit dark out to be putting lights up. We can go a night without, what did you call them, lawn deer?” a little laugh flavouring your voice. “We could crack open a bottle of eggnog and do some indoor decorating. Put the lights on the tree, hang the stockings…maybe put on Home Alone…”

“Yeah….yeah I like that alot.” He stripped off the vest and toboggan, “Can we watch Home Alone first? I’m all about that couch at this moment.”

You motion for him to sit down as you get the eggnog and some glasses from the cupboard. He flips through the DVR until he comes across Home Alone. He waits until you settle down next to him before starting the movie. He leans up, pouring a glass for the both of you. His arm wraps around you as the movie starts. However he pauses it fairly quickly.

“Wanna make this interesting?” His eyebrows wiggling, his signature smirk coming across his face. He takes a sip of the drink, some of the nog sticking to his moustache. His tongue slowly (or maybe your brain just slowed it down) licked the excess away.

“What do you have in mind?”

“The Home Alone drinking game.” he scoops up his ipad, pulling up the rules. A smile coming to your face as you watch the odd way he types with his thumbs.

He passes it over to you for your approval.

You read over it, before handing it back. “Seems pretty simple, alright Let’s do it.”

“Ah, yes mate! Now it feels like Christmas!” He pumped his fist and took another swig of his drink.

“What, do you do this back home?”

“Not Home Alone, no, but there is a fair amount of drinking. It’s not Christmas until you’re hungover and don’t feel like doing shit.”

You weren’t exactly surprised. A lot of his stories seemed to center around drinking. You could picture him laying on the couch, blearily opening gifs. His eyes mostly screwed shut, wincing at every loud noise as he fought with fancy ribbons. Sticking every bow in messy hair, telling everyone he was the only gift worth getting.

You both were quickly figuring out why the rules said to do this with beer and not with mixed drinks. You were halfway through the movie and both of you were fairly tipsy, raucous laughter filling your living room. You were both leaning in each other, your faces red from laughing so hard. The eggnog was long gone and you had started pouring vodka into poorly heated hot chocolate. At least the mug was hot. By the time the movie had ended, you both were drinking straight from the bottle.

“Hey, hey, you know what we should-what we should do?” His hand rapidly tapping your arm to get your attention. His words punctured by drunken giggles. “We should- we should get on some Christmas jumpers and go- go caroling.”

“Don’t you- don’t you need a group for caroling?” You could help but giggling with him, the sheer excitement pouring off him. He was practically bouncing with glee at the thought of it.

“Pff, no. There’s two of us. That’s enough for carolers. If it was just me, it would be caroler. That’s….That’s no good. You can’t spread the cheer proper with just one.”

“What the hell, sounds like fun.”

You both make your way to your bedroom, dragging out the Christmas sweaters you had purchased the moment they appeared. You’re depicted an unamused looking llama with a santa hat that read fa la la la la llama. Ed had picked out a monstrosity of a sweater covered in cats wearing santa hats and bow ties, riding on slices of pizza that read have yourself a meowy Christmas. You knew he owned some already but he insisted that we get new ones that match. You suspected he spotted the magic pizza riding cats and just had to have it.

You both change, bundling up in scarfs and gloves, Ed cramming a lopsided santa hat on his head, his dorky grin still going strong. You put on a headband with red felt antlers attached and head out.

A fair bit of snow had fallen, leaving everything coated in a thick layer of fluffy white snow. It had slackened up some, not falling as heavily as it was earlier. You reach the first house, Ed somewhat banging on the door, still wearing that goofy grin. The door swung open to a very confused looking woman.

“Uh…can I help you?” she seemed puzzled as she stared at the two of you has a fit of giggles swept over the both of you.

“We’re here to spread Christmas cheer! We’re carolers!” his arms spreading wide, his hand hitting one of the felt antlers.

“Oh! Where’s the rest of your group? You’ve seemed to have lost them.” She was clearly worried we were so plastered that we wandered off from our group.

“No group, just us. That’s all you need, innit?” His cheerful voice echoing loudly down the street, giving every house in the vicinity a fair warning that we were coming.

“I…guess? Alright, what do you got?”

Ed cleared his throat and you realised you hadn’t even picked songs before you knocked so you were just going to have to go off his lead.

“Frosty the snowmaaaaaaaaan was a very jolly soooooooul! With a corn cob pipe and a button nose and two eyes made out of coooooooooaaaaaaal!” His hands waving in a mock conductor way as you hastened to fall into rhythm. “Frosty the snowmaaaaaaaaan….” His eyes darting around as he tried to remember the next lyric, his brows furrowed in concentration, but instead of stopping and thinking of what the lyric was he continued with “Duna dun dun dun dun dun you’ll be back again some daaaaaaaaaay!”

You were so thrown by his sudden remix that you busted out laughing, unable to sing the actual lyric to help the boy out. He has did some sort of odd shuffle tap dance thing, complete with jazz hands and a huge beaming smile, obviously proud of his “quick” thinking.

The lady just stared at the two of you blankly as you’re still laughing and he’s still beaming with pride, like some kid who did the best performance. Once she realised you couldn’t possibly sing and he thought the song was over she gave you a slow, confusing clap. A quizzical look still on her face as she tried to figure out what exactly just happened.

“That was….something….you guys have a good Christmas and um…be careful.”

“You have a happy Christmas too! NO a MEOWY Christmas!” He pulled his sweater up show the lettering. She just gave an awkward wave as she closed the door.

We bounded to the next house, you decided to knock on it so it didn’t sound as demanding, but let’s be honest, yours was just as loud as his. This time a younger boy, by the looks of it maybe seven, opened the door. Ed squatted down, losing his balance slightly, having to grab your leg to gain his balance back.

“Hey mate, is your mum or dad around? We’d like to sing a song. We’re carolers.” His voice was a lot softer than when he spoke to the last house. You wondered if he thought he was whispering when in reality he had found the right speaking volume.

The kid wasn’t buying it. “I’ve seen carolers on tv. There’s always more than two. Who are you really?”

Ed’s smile never faltered in the least. “If two people are cheery enough, you don’t need the rest of them.”

The kid still eyed us suspiciously as he turned back yelling for his parents. Ed stood up, a little wobbly, grabbing your shoulder for support. When the adults showed up Ed did the whole “We’re carolers” spiel again.

“If you’re carolers sing Rudolph.” This kid just wasn’t having it.

“Rudolph the red nosed reindeeeeeeeer, had a very shiny nooooooose. And if you ever saw iiiiiiiiiit, you would even say it gloooooooooows- you might wanna get yourself checked Rudie, you may have a problem-” he nudges your arm and does a subtle glug glug motion with a wink as you try and suppress laughter as you both continue on. “All of the other reindeeeeeeeer used to laugh and call him naaaaaames- well that’s not very nice -they never let poor Rudie join in any reindeer gaaaaaaames -Don’t be like them Billy, that’s bad.”

As you two sang along the kid looked confused. “But my name’s not Billy…”

Once the song finished, Ed did a grandiose bow, his hat falling off causing him to laugh and cram it back on his head. The snow glistening in the light pouring out the door. His smile as crooked as his hat. They waved as the two of you made your way down to the next house.

This time he chose to sing Jingle Bells, a safe choice, everyone knows Jingle Bells, it’s quite hard to mess up. Yet, you realised you underestimated him.

“Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle all the waaaaaaay oh-I should have brought my guitar- what fun it is to riiiiiiiide in a one horse open sleeeeeigh. Jingle Bells, batman smells, Robin laid an eeeeegggggg, the batmobile lost a wheel and the Joker learned Ballet!” He had started clapping to the beat, really getting into it, not even noticing that he was singing the wrong version. Or maybe he did and just was having fun with it. It was obvious you both were enjoying yourselves.

The next song he tried to tackle was the twelve days of Christmas, which was a beautiful trainwreck. The items for the days kept changing and some of them you just knew wasn’t in the original song. Some were just mix matched with other verses, some were downright vulgar. Thankfully there were no kids present to hear the alternate verses and the group of people who were having their Christmas party really seemed to enjoy it, just as, if not more drunk than the two of you. They offered both a shot fireball as a thanks for entertaining us. After a brief chat and some photos you continued on your way.

You scooped up some freshly fallen snow and packed it into a somewhat spherical shape and lobbed it at the back of his head. Your aim was a little off, striking him between the shoulder blades instead with a wet thwacking noise. He turned around slowly, a shocked expression on his face as you tried your best to look innocent. It was obvious you had thrown it, considering you two were the only ones out.

You raced down the sidewalk, sliding and stumbling about, snowballs and loose snow being flung towards each other. Caroling was completely forgotten about as you both waged all out war on each other. Hiding behind trash cans, bushes, whatever could provide somewhat decent coverage. You didn’t care how utterly ridiculous you both looked, dodging and rolling behind things, full on sprinting to get to the next spot that gave shelter.

You had ran aimlessly, not paying any attention where you were going, just ambling along, laughter trailing after you filling the streets. You could hear Ed singing behind you.

“Tis the season to be jolly, fa la la la la la, la la la llama!” The next bit sounded a bit slurred and muffled, telling you he didn’t really know the next verse but it sounded like “deck the brows with halls of holly” and the next verse “Now there’s Don in gay apparel.” ending it all with a dramatic fa la la la la la la la LLAMA!”

You had given up on going to people’s door, choosing to just belt them out as you walked down the sidewalk arm in arm. Both of you fairly exhausted from running down streets, trying hard not to lose your balance. You had began your way back home. You both marveled at the Christmas lights, commenting on your favorites. Ed posed with an inflatable gingerbread man so you could snap a picture. He pulled you next to him, saying you’d make the picture worth looking at.

Once you had made your way back home, all you wanted to do was cuddle up under the blankets with Ed. It seemed he had the same thing on his mind.

“Can we finish this later? I just wanna watch a film in bed right now.” He had already began stripping off his layers, but keeping the santa hat on. You climbed in beside him, getting comfortable as his arm wrapped around you. Your head rested in his chest as you watched the film. Ed had already drifted off, his breathing had deepened, ending in a slight whistle. The rise and fall of his chest paired with the steady beat of his heart was the perfect lullaby and soon your breathing had fell in sync with his as you drifted off.

#ed sheeran #teddy sheeran #code ginger #ed sheeran fanfic #ed sheeran fanfiction #ed sheeran fan fiction #ed sheeran one shot #celebrity fanfiction

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westallenfun · 6 years

Text

A Long Winter’s Nap, Chapter 4

Westallen Secret Santa gift from @jade4813 for @westallen94

It turned out that Cynthia hadn’t been lying about the power of Nora’s persuasion, which is how Iris found herself at the Allens’ house later that evening. It was the first time in years she’d celebrated Christmas surrounded by laughter and loved ones. Ever since her dad’s death, she spent her holidays in quiet solitude, with only Hallmark movies to keep her company.

She fingered the fabric of the beautiful sweater Nora and Henry had given her as she looked at the people around her. Once again, she was struck by how much they clearly loved each other. Nora and Cynthia were laughing about a truly hideous sweater one had given the other – apparently a yearly tradition. Martin and Henry were arguing good-naturedly about some article that had just been printed in a medical journal. Joshua sat next to the tree, a ridiculous Santa hat on his head and the closest thing she’d ever seen to a smile on his face.

And then there was Barry. She turned his way and caught his eye, which is when she realized he’d been watching her. However, while she no longer saw suspicion in his eyes, she couldn’t read whatever had replaced it. When he realized he’d been caught, he flushed, but then he raised his glass to her in a silent toast. Not knowing how to interpret that, Iris frowned slightly and looked away. She might have preferred suspicious Barry to this enigmatic one. At least when he’d been suspicious of her, it had given her justification to avoid him.

After the party, Iris was wrapping her scarf around her neck when Martin looked out the window. “It’s getting pretty icy out there. Are you sure you’ll be safe driving home?”

“Oh, I didn’t drive,” Iris responded, buttoning her coat. “I actually don’t live that far from here, so I walked over. I’m sure I’ll be fine!”

Henry sucked in a sharp breath. “You can’t walk home alone in this!” he protested. “It isn’t safe!”

“No, really, I –” she began.

“I’ll walk her home.” The voice silenced her, and she turned to see Barry standing nearby. He had already grabbed his coat and was slipping it on. “Don’t worry, Dad. I’ll make sure she gets home safe.”

She gritted her teeth. It would be a lot easier to avoid him if he would stop being around every time she turned around. “I’m fine. Honestly. I appreciate the concern, but it really isn’t necessary. If you walk me home, you’ll only have to walk back by yourself!”

He was undeterred by her protests. “I could use the fresh air.” At her obstinate glare, he threw her a pretty impressive puppy dog look. “Let me walk you home? Please?”

She sighed and caved. “Oh, all right.” Before she could second-guess her decision, she followed him out the door.

Barry waited until they were a few yards from the house before he spoke. “There’s a reason I wanted to talk to you alone. Iris, I owe you an apology.”

Her momentary feeling of triumph faded when she remembered that he’d actually been wright all along. Her gaze dropping to the sidewalk, she protested, “Oh, no, that’s not necessary –”

Raising one hand in a halting gesture, he cut her off. “No. It is. I shouldn’t have acted the way I did. The truth is –” He paused and heaved a heavy sigh. “The truth is that, as distant as Eddie has been over the last few years, I didn’t want to believe that things had gotten to the point where he wouldn’t tell us he was engaged. I didn’t want to think he’d become a person I don’t really know anymore. But the truth is…the truth is, he’s been that person for a while.”

“Oh, Barry,” she murmured. “I’m sure that’s not true. I’m sure he was going to tell you.”

“It isn’t just the engagement,” he explained. “It’s…everything, really.” He sighed again and then shook his head. “But you should also know that…I’m glad. That he found someone like you, I mean. And I really did want to come by to apologize for earlier.”

“It’s all right,” she replied, finally looking back up at him. “I understand. You’re very protective of your family. But you have to understand, I never want to hurt them.”

He smiled at her. “I believe you.” Silence fell between them for a moment, and then he asked, “So how did you and Eddie meet?” When she shot him a quick glare, he protested, “I’m not quizzing you, I swear! I’m just curious. We’re going to be in-laws. I want to know more about you!”

“It’s the Mayor’s new initiative. Every police precinct is assigned to certain schools. Officers come in regularly – at least a couple times a month – to teach kids about safety, the dangers of doing drugs, that kind of thing. Eddie’s been coming around pretty regularly, so we got to talking one day and…the rest is history.” Or fiction, at least.

“Do you like it? Teaching school, I mean?”

She nodded. “Of course! It’s kind of strange, because it was never really my dream to be a teacher one day. I was going to be a cop like my dad. But I guess life doesn’t always turn out the way you plan, does it? I sort of fell into teaching, but now…I couldn’t imagine doing anything else.”

He nodded towards a large patch of ice and they swerved in their path to avoid it. “So are your parents sorry or relieved that you didn’t follow in his footsteps?” he asked lightly.

She stuck her hands in her pockets and shrugged. “Ah…he was relieved, I think. But he passed away a few years ago. My mom died when I was really little, so it’s just me now.”

Barry halted in his steps and reached for her elbow. Before he could make contact, however, he paused and let his hand fall to his side. When she glanced up at him, he said softly, “Iris, I’m sorry.”

She threw him a small smile. “It’s okay, you couldn’t know.” Flushing at his attention, she cleared her throat and decided to change the subject. “What about you? Did you always dream of being a teacher, or did you fall into it like I did?”

“I guess I fell into it. I’ve always been a bit of a science geek. For a while in college, I thought about becoming a forensic scientist. Kinda funny when you think about it. You and I both almost went into law enforcement. I even had this idea that Eddie and I could partner up together on cases sometimes.” His mouth twisted into a grimace. “That didn’t work out. Obviously.

“But I still really enjoyed studying science, and when I was in college, I did some tutoring for extra pizza money. You know those moments where you find just the right way to explain something to someone and it just clicks for them? You can actually see that moment that something goes from being a mystery to totally making sense?” She nodded. “The first time it happened to me…I don’t know. I guess something clicked for me, too. I realized I wanted to become a teacher so I could keep having those moments.”

Iris smiled at him. “That’s actually…that’s really great. I bet you’re an amazing teacher.”

“I know you are. I may have heard some of the students talking about you today. They really like your class. Though I never did figure out what you did with the toilet paper.”

She laughed. “All right, you caught me. I didn’t really need it. I was just trying to avoid you.”

Barry winced. “I made that bad of a first impression, huh?”

“I’ve had worse,” she responded lightly, nudging him with her elbow.

“Any chance I could convince you to give me a second chance? After all, we do work together. And we’re going to be family.”

Her chuckle died at the reminder of her lie, but she forced herself to smile. “I suppose so. Since we’re going to be seeing each other every day. Anyway, this is me.” She nodded towards the tall brick apartment building in front of them. “Thanks for walking me home. And for the chat.”

Barry reached out and placed his hand on the small of her back. She jumped at his touch, though it was muffled by the thick fabric. He didn’t seem to notice her reaction. “I’m here already. I might as well walk you to your door,” he offered gallantly. “Careful. The sidewalk looks pretty slippery.”

But Iris wasn’t the first to almost fall. It took only two steps before Barry’s foot hit a particularly slick spot, and his arms flailed as he tried to catch his balance. Without thinking, Iris wrapped her arm around him, helping steady him. “You okay?” she asked when he had finally straightened.

“Y-yeah,” he said breathlessly. “I think I’m okay now.”

Iris took one more step and her feet slid out from under her. With a small squeak of surprise and dismay, she began to go down. Barry tried to catch her, and somehow her arm found its way around his neck, dragging him down with her.

She landed in a giant snowbank, Barry on top of her. The look of surprise on his face was so comical that she couldn’t hold back her howl of laughter. “A-are you okay?” she finally managed through her giggles.

“Yeah. Are you?” She could feel his breath against her cheek and her laugh cut off abruptly when she realized how close he was to her. She shifted, and her breath melted a snowflake that had landed on the corner of his mouth. It wouldn’t take much – just a slight tilt of her head – and she could kiss him. She could brush her lips against that slight crease that formed in his cheek when he smiled.

“Y-yeah,” she breathed. His gaze dropped to her mouth, and she licked her lips nervously, wondering if he was thinking the same thing she was. No, of course he wasn’t. He thought she was engaged to his brother. “Um…do you think you can make it to your feet? My back is getting cold.” It really wasn’t. She didn’t feel anything but the warmth of his body covering hers. But it seemed like her back should be cold, and it was as good an excuse as any to put some distance between them.

Barry blushed and jerked way. “Oh, god, I’m sorry. I didn’t even think – yeah. Of course. Yeah. Hold on a second.” Moving very carefully, he rose to his feet and offered her a hand. “Let me help you up.”

Even through their gloves, Iris felt a spark between them – like a tiny jolt of electricity – when she placed her palm in his. He helped her to her feet, where the two of them stood inches from each other. “Thanks,” she murmured, unconsciously resting her hands against his chest.

“No problem,” he breathed. She shivered when she felt the soft vibration of his voice through her palms. She felt herself sway towards him, and for a second, she could swear he ducked his head for a kiss. Before their lips could meet, however, he took an abrupt step back. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

Sucking in a sharp breath to clear her head, Iris nodded. She couldn’t believe she’d thought he was about to kiss her. Worse, she was pretty sure she’d have let him. Even if he didn’t think she was engaged to his brother, she was in love with Eddie. Wasn’t she? “Yes. Of course,” she responded firmly, as much to herself as to him.

Barry’s gaze slid away from hers as he nodded towards their destination. “Almost there.” He grabbed her hand and then turned to lead her to her door. Iris took advantage of his distraction, wanting to break the strange tension that had stretched between them. While his back was turned, she swooped down and grabbed a handful of snow, quickly forming a pathetic excuse for a snowball – the best she could do with one hand.

He had taken one step, and she pulled her hand out of his. Sinking her teeth into her lower lip, she bit back her giggle as she waited for him to turn towards her. The minute he did, she pelted him with her handful of mostly loose snow.

“Are you –” The snow splattered across his chest, and she let loose with a howl of laughter. “Oh, that’s what we’re doing now?” he challenged.

Iris threw him her most innocent look in return, but it changed into a shriek of dismay when he bent down to scoop up his own handful of snow. With a sheet of ice behind her, she made a giant leap into the nearby snowbank. She needed any traction she could get if she was going to get away.

A snowball hit her shoulder, a small chunk breaking off to freeze the back of her neck. With a shriek, Iris bent and scooped up her own snowball to throw it back at Barry. Their snowball fight began in earnest – though their projectiles were made with more enthusiasm than talent.

She had just straightened from picking up more snow when Barry grabbed her from behind. Wrapping his arms around her, he pinned her arms to her chest. “I don’t think so!” he cried into her ear.

Iris let out a bark of laughter, trying to squirm out of his embrace but he held her too tightly. She could almost feel his lips brush against her neck when he growled, “I’m not letting go until you agree to a truce.”

“It sounds like you don’t want to admit that you lost!” she crowed, turning to look at him. His mouth was only an inch from hers, and she froze.

The grin that lit up his entire face fell, and he stared deeply into her eyes. “I guess I am,” he admitted in a voice barely above a whisper. She was struck by his odd phrasing, but before she could ask what he meant, he murmured, “You – you have snow –” Relaxing his hold on her, he lifted one hand and cupped her face, his thumb tracing a line along her cheekbone.

She sucked in a deep breath. “I-I should go. Thanks…for the walk home.” Leaning up on her tiptoes, she brushed her lips across his cheek. “Goodnight.”

Iris could still feel the warmth of his breath against the back of her neck as she darting into the building and up the stairs to her front door. Once she was safely behind the protection of the solid wood panel, she leaned against her front door with a sigh. Then she giggled softly, warmed by the memory of his laugh when she’d pelted him with snow.

Before she could ponder her motives for doing so, she jogged to the window to watch Barry as he made his way back down the sidewalk to the street. A small smile on her face, she continued to watch him until he moved completely out of view. It was only then that she rested her forehead against the cold glass, which fogged up when she groaned, “Iris, you are in so much trouble.”

#westallen #The Flash #westallen secret santa #Barry Allen #Iris West #Iris WestAllen #Barry x Iris #Iris x Barry

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lauraxxtennant · 7 years

Text

fic: the trace of pleasure or regret, (3/5)

Previous: One - Two

Ao3

“You do realise this is the most romantic thing anyone’s ever done for me, right?” Rose asked two weeks later, as they sat inside an open-air monorail carriage, travelling slowly on a stilted track overlooking the Firefly Display of Ludolphi.

The Doctor chuckled, and tugged on his ear. “Well, it’s Christmas. Had to bring you somewhere special.”

“Thanks, Doctor,” she said softly, and snuggled into him, lifting his arm around her shoulders.

They had the carriage to themselves, and he held her close, unable to resist nuzzling the top of her head. “You’re welcome.”

Her hand was resting on his thigh, a warm pressure that kept making him blush every time he glanced down and saw it.

In the days that followed their discussion in the console room, they had resumed their ostensibly platonic but actually entirely not platonic gestures of affection, and were growing very adept at lying to themselves quite thoroughly about it. He pretended he didn’t want to pull her into his lap and let her have her way with him every time she ruffled his hair, and she pretended she wasn’t turned on each time he so much as stroked his hand down her arm on his way to entwining their fingers. The both of them ignored the heated looks they sent each other’s way, and neither of them said a word when, during a rough landing as the TARDIS materialised this morning, he’d ended up half on top of her, one leg between hers and her hip digging into his zip.

He thought they deserved some sort of award, quite frankly, especially since she was wearing a skirt today. It really wouldn’t require any effort at all for him to just -

“It’s like magic,” she whispered, watching the fireflies dart through the air in increasingly intricate patterns.

“It is,” he nodded, turning his gaze back to the deep purple sky. “It’ll be winding down soon, though. We should get off at the next stop, make our way back to the TARDIS. By the look of that sky, there’ll be a snowstorm later tonight.”

“That’s amazing,” she said, glancing at him. “Fireflies are lighting up the sky, and then later it’s gonna snow? It’s lovely.”

“Yeah, wait ‘til you see the snowflakes.”

The train slowed to a stop, and they disembarked, making their way down the spiral staircase to ground level. The monorail had taken them on a circular trip around the Ludolphi National Park, so they were only about twenty minutes away from where they had parked the TARDIS.

Rose slipped her gloved hand into his, and swung their arms between them as they walked. “So this happens every Christmas, for them?”

“On their version of Christmas, yes. They watch the display, then go back to their grottos for a feast of dried fruits and nuts.”

Rose wrinkled her nose. “Yeah, that’s no match for Mum’s roast.”

“It’s certainly not the most filling of meals, I grant you. Are you peckish? We can stop off somewhere for food before you head to bed.”

“No, it’s all right, I’m still full from that pasta we had for dinner. You made way too much.”

“Needed to provide you sustenance for our night out in the cold,” he explained. “It was tasty though, right?”

“It was scrumptious,” she confirmed, grinning up at him with her tongue-touched smile.

“Good.”

A group of children - whose appearance, Rose had mentioned to him earlier, reminded her of the Whos in her favourite Christmas film - stopped them, then, blocking their path so that they could sing them a festive tune and stick out their hats for some stray coins.

Rose nudged his shoulder. “Go on then, they’ve got lovely voices, give them something.”

He was digging around in his pocket, trying to find the appropriate currency. “Aha!” He tossed some buttons into the rosy-cheeked choir leader’s hat, nodding to her in acknowledgement.

“Buttons?” Rose laughed.

“That’s what they trade in here.”

She shook her head, amazed once again.

The little girl he’d given the buttons to handed something to Rose. “What’s that?” he asked, as the kids went on their way.

“It’s mistletoe.” Rose bit her lip, then looped the sprig around the pompom on her woolly hat, waggling her eyebrows at him.

The Doctor laughed nervously. “Very nice. Decorative.” He touched it, and it fell out a little, so he secured it properly, then met her gaze again. She looked all hopeful and delicious and he wanted nothing more than to lean in closer. His eyes dropped to her mouth for a second, before returning to hers.

They hastily resumed their walk.

“So,” she said, taking his hand again. “What other festive traditions do they have here?”

“Hmm, not sure I recall what else.” His eyes lit up in sudden remembrance. “Oh! They do have this rather charming one - not everyone does it, but some light torches all along the paths to their homes, to guide anyone who might be in need of companionship to those who are willing to welcome some lonely soul into their home for the season.”

Rose’s brow furrowed. “That’s really sweet. But if that happened where I’m from, people would misuse it.”

“Hmm?”

“Could be a trap, right? Some murderer might lure an unsuspecting victim into their house. Or the other way around - the stranger to the house might worm his way in and then turn the whole thing into something out of a horror film - ” She caught his alarmed look. “What?”

“Full of Christmas spirit, you, eh?” he remarked.

“Just saying.”

He shook his head. “Thankfully, I don’t believe anything like that’s happened here.”

“Yet,” she said ominously.

“How sinister. Right, we need to shake this suspicious nature of yours,” he laughed. “Come with me.”

Veering off from the route to the TARDIS, he led Rose through the park until they reached a small lake. They looked across, and saw several paths leading up from the banks to little huts. Each path was lined with lit torches, encased in small domes to protect the flames from the impending snow.

“Ah, you see! Those families over there are getting involved. Shall we see if they’d take in us stragglers?” He nodded to the bridge they could walk across to get to the residents.

Some of them were outside at the moment, laughing and dancing as one of the children played an instrument a bit like a violin. Rose watched, smiling.

“They do seem pretty harmless,” she conceded.

“Yep. Just opening their homes in goodwill to those who need it. Do you want to go and chat?”

Rose looked reluctant, which he found surprising, as she was always up for befriending the locals, usually. “I guess we could,” she replied.

“You don’t want to,” he realised, and squeezed her hand.

“It’s not that I seriously think they’re secret murderers,” she laughed. “I mean, if I did actually think that, then we’d be heading over to put a stop to it.”

He chuckled.

“But...” Her free hand wandered up his arm, stroking the sleeve of his coat. “We’re not lonely souls. And I don’t fancy a meal of fruits and nuts, however lovely they are.”

“Okay,” he nodded. To be honest, he’d rather not extend their stay here further anyway. They’d had a really nice day together, just them, no trouble or things getting in the way.

“Besides,” she continued, and seemed to read his mind, “I wanted it to just be...us, tonight.”

The Doctor hid his smile by turning them around, leading her back towards the TARDIS. “Yeah.”

“I’ve really enjoyed all this. Thanks for bringing me here.”

He could sense her looking up at him as they walked, and he shrugged modestly.

They passed some more children, slightly older than the group who had sung to them earlier. “It’s gonna snow!” one said gleefully.

Rose grinned. “They look so excited. Don’t they get snow often?”

“Around this time of year, yeah - always seem to have a white Christmas, this lot. But building snowmen never really loses its charm for kids, does it? Even if they do it every year.”

Rose giggled. “You want to stick around and build one too? You’re such a big kid.”

He sniffed. “No.” He paused. “But I bet I could build a good one.”

“I bet you could, too,” she placated him, patting his arm.

There was a small patch of ice on the path, and Rose lost her footing, turning her pat into a grab for balance. “Woah, careful,” he said, using his free arm to help her get steady.

She looked up at him, and he could feel her pulse racing against his wrist. “Thanks,” she said softly.

“No problem. Neither of us need any more falling-over-related injuries.”

“Yeah, we seem to be doing that a lot,” she realised, laughing. “Your fault, with your poor flying.”

“The TARDIS was just feeling a tad off today, that’s why we had a rough landing - ”

“Sure, sure, blame it on your ship.”

“It’s true!”

“The TARDIS didn’t fling us to the floor of the library that time, though. That was all you, breaking that poor ladder. Which you still haven’t fixed, by the way!”

“Does it need to be fixed so urgently? And did you have to bring that up, I’d just about blocked that out.”

“Yeah! I love that sliding ladder, makes me feel like I’m in a castle or something.”

The Doctor laughed, and felt the urge to hug her. He didn’t, because it’d be out of nowhere and look completely ridiculous, so he settled for slipping his arm around her waist, holding her loosely and hoping it wasn’t too obvious. Her hand slipped from his so that both of hers were now resting in the crooks of his elbows, so he raised his other arm, too, encircling her, and basically getting the hug he wanted, sort of. There was still enough space between them for them to converse face to face.

“Why are you so embarrassed about it, anyway?” she asked.

“Because it was embarrassing!”

“Why?”

“Because we were...it was all a bit...odd, that day. That whole week. And maybe I was, I don’t know, gonna flirt with you a bit, tease you about wanting to read Time Lord books, and then instead I made a fool of myself, breaking the moment. And a piece of furniture.”

“It wasn’t much of a moment, to be honest. We’ve had better. And trust you, thinking teasing someone about books equates to flirting.”

“Well.” He huffed. “It could have been a moment.”

“Yeah?” She raised her eyebrows. “What were you planning on doing, exactly?”

“I honestly don’t know, but I had some vague notions about - well, we’d watched that TV show the night before, and those two characters you liked who were both pretending one was teaching the other how to play pool, but really, it was just an excuse to get all close and personal, and...”

Rose smirked. “And you decided by climbing up behind me you could ‘teach me about literature’ when you really just wanted a cuddle?”

He tilted his head to the side. “Maybe.”

“You’re so daft.”

“I missed you.”

“I was right there.”

“Yes, but it all felt...wrong. Strained.”

“I know,” she said gently. “But we’ve fixed it now, right? Think we’ve got this ‘just friends’ thing down perfect.”

The Doctor raised an eyebrow.

“What?” she asked innocently.

“Nothing. You’re right. We’ve been exceedingly well-behaved.”

“So why that look?”

“Because...” He sighed, eyeing the mistletoe still decorating her hat, and telling himself to have more willpower. They’d been doing so well. All these long, happy, funny days they’d had lately, without him once thinking of kissing her. Well, all right, he’d thought about it, quite a lot, perhaps, but neither of them had tried to act on it. Much. He supposed it could be argued that he’d nearly leaned in last night, when she tackled him for the TV remote and his hand had accidentally landed on her bare thigh (she wore those pyjama shorts of hers on purpose, he just knew it) and their eyes had met and her hand dropped to his chest, thumb stroking his sternum through the gap in his shirt, and -

And then the volume of the TV dramatically increased as one of them leant on the remote, and they were shocked into withdrawing their various limbs, and instead sat side by side without touching for the rest of their Disney movie marathon.

“Because?” she whispered.

“Because sometimes it’s just so...you’re just so...” The Doctor exhaled a long breath. “Tempting.”

Rose slid her arms up, linking her hands behind the back of his neck. Her gloves impeded any chance of her running her fingers through his hair, but he appreciated the embrace just the same.

“You do know all we’re doing is prolonging the inevitable, yeah? I mean, I’m trying, I really am,” she said, giving him her best, most earnest look, “But when you look at me the way you do and say things like that, I remember that you want me back and I get a little drunk on it.”

“Perhaps if we just…” he started, tilting his head towards her, “Perhaps if we just allow ourselves a kiss, now and then, it’ll clear our heads. Maybe that can be enough.”

“Do you really think so?” she asked, clearly dubious.

“No, of course not. But can’t you just indulge me?” he replied, smirking a bit. “It is Christmas.”

“That’s a dangerous path, Doctor.”

“Spiralling down the rabbit hole, opening a can of worms - yes, I know.” He slipped his hands around to grab her hips through her thick winter jacket. “But it’d feel nice.”

“And festive,” she reasoned, wobbling her head to indicate the mistletoe.

“Exactly!” He liked her idea; ran with it. “We’d be doing this holiday an injustice if we passed that tradition up.”

“True…”

He lifted one hand to cup her jaw, stroking his thumb softly against her cheek. “Merry Christmas, Rose Tyler.”

Just as he leant down to press his lips to hers, her phone started ringing. Her eyes shot to his, wide and shocked and, he hoped, disappointed, and he couldn’t help but laugh.

“That’ll be Jackie,” he guessed, smiling at Rose graciously. “Impeccable timing, as always.”

“I can ignore it,” she suggested, her hand flying to his, to keep it where it was, against her cheek.

“She’ll keep ringing. Go on, answer it.” He settled for kissing her forehead, then let go of her, stepping back.

Grumbling under her breath, Rose finally dug her phone out of her jacket pocket, answering with a curt, “Yes?” Her demeanor changed swiftly, however, as whoever was on the other end spoke to her. “Oh! Hi! How are you?”

Frowning, curious, the Doctor gestured towards a nearby bench, and they sat close together. Well, Rose sat down after him and there was space between them, so he scooted over, closing the distance, eager to eavesdrop. It didn’t sound like Jackie.

“Oh my god, that’s amazing! Congratulations!”

Her hand landed on his thigh as she made her surprised exclamation, and he was once again momentarily mesmerised by the sight. Then, he pulled himself together and listened to her, because she was saying something very alarming.

“Sure! Yeah, we’d love to come! I can’t believe this, Shareen, I’m so happy for you. Ha, no fear! Nah, that’s not what we’re...no. Don’t be daft.”

The Doctor watched curiously as Rose blushed crimson. She looked adorable, sitting here in her colourful scarf and hat, all cosy and warm as snowflakes started to fall, catching in her hair and on her eyelashes. He wondered briefly what was making her all flushed and flustered, then decided he didn’t really care because she was squeezing his thigh in that distracted way again.

“No. Way,” she gasped. “Did she really? Oh my god, I hope we get to see that!”

He was intrigued again; he liked a good gossip. Clearly one of her friends from back home had done something scandalous. He grinned, wondering how they would react if they heard some of things Rose Tyler got up to.

Not of that nature, of course, but - well. Still exciting. Adventurous. No doubt if they did get up to things of that nature, then she’d be just as -

“Okay, I’ll tell him. Yes. Yes. I promise. I’ll make him give it to me as my Christmas present, then he won’t be able to refuse.” She smiled that smile of hers with the tongue at the corner of her mouth and he sighed, wondering what he was about to get himself into.

“Yep, okay. Bye for now! See you soon!” She hung up and pocketed her phone, then turned her body towards him on the bench, removing her hand from his thigh only to fiddle with his lapel. “Doctor…”

He steeled himself; she wouldn’t best him too quickly. He had to make a show of resisting whatever it was she wanted, especially as she was using that tone of voice she used that indicated he wasn’t gonna like what she had to say.

“Ro-ose,” he mimicked, drawing out her name.

“You know how I’m your best mate and you like me a lot?”

“Mmm?”

“And you know how it’s Christmas and at Christmas you do things to make people happy?”

“Yes…?”

“And you know how I’m always good for keeping up my end of a deal?”

“Indeed.”

She grinned. “Okay, so there’s this wedding.”

The Doctor groaned. “No.”

“It’s Shareen’s! She’s getting married. I can’t miss that.”

“I’ll drop you off and you can go but I’m not - ”

“Please come with, Doctor, it’ll be fun!”

“Weddings are boring even when you know the people involved; I’ve barely spoken to Shareen, I won’t know the groom, I’ll - I’ll be bored stiff!”

She pouted. “Even with me there?”

“Yes! Weddings are ridiculous, a waste of everyone’s time if you ask me.”

Rose rolled her eyes. “Well, the romance had to end sometime, I guess,” she muttered.

“The only good thing about weddings is the cake, and even that can sometimes be a bit on the dry side, which is always such a disappointment.”

“Doctor.”

“And it’s just - so domestic.”

“I’ll do anything you want if you come with me.”

“And there’s never any - ” He paused, taking in her words, and lifted an eyebrow. “Anything I want?”

She met his eye fearlessly. “Yeah. Like I said. I always stick to a deal. If you aren’t gonna come to the wedding out of the goodness of your hearts, then the least you can do is make a pact with me about it.”

The Doctor leant his elbow against the back of the bench, scratching at his temple as he considered this. She leant closer, eyes bright and hopeful.

“You don’t have to decide the terms now. You can have a think about that. But I’ll make it worth your while,” she promised.

“I’m sure you will,” he murmured, gaze drawn to her mouth as she licked her lips. A snowflake fell there shortly after, and she licked again as it melted. The pull of attraction was too strong, in that moment, to resist. His hand went to the back of her head, accidentally dislodging her hat, and he moved her mouth to meet his, kissing her gently. She gasped, and he took a moment to whisper, “To be clear, this isn’t part of the deal, you were gonna kiss me just now anyway - ” But before he could continue, she’d smushed their lips together again, and he promptly got lost in the kiss.

A few minutes of utter bliss was all he was granted, however, as the snowfall started to get heavier, impeding their efforts. They parted and he stood, settling her hat back on her head with a sheepish grin, before linking their hands as they wordlessly walked the rest of the way back to the TARDIS.

Snow on Ludolphi was a beautiful thing to behold, as the unique properties of this planet’s water and atmosphere meant that, when frozen, tiny pinpricks of what looked like pink crystals emerged in its rain. Rose’s reaction to it, when she noticed, was enough to make his hearts speed up as quickly as when she was kissing him. She didn’t say anything, but her wide-eyed wonder and the way she whirled her head about as she took it all in...and that smile. When she looked up at him with that smile -

He really would do anything for her, regardless of deals and promises, and he wondered if she even knew.

“I forgot to ask,” the Doctor said, sticking his head out from under the console.

Rose looked up from her magazine. “What’s that?”

“Why were you blushing earlier, when Shareen was talking to you on the phone?”

She kept her cool, returning her gaze to her article. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”

Rose could feel his eyes on her, still, and after several seconds, couldn’t resist looking at him again. He’d finished his repairs, apparently, which he’d insisted were necessary once they’d got back to the TARDIS this evening. She knew he was just using them as an excuse to get away from her for a bit, after their kiss. She didn’t mind, expected it, even; but she wasn’t gonna let him push her too far away, hence why she’d lingered on the jumpseat reading rather than abandoning the room altogether.

Now, he was scooting out from the console and wiping his hands on a stray cloth. He glanced at the console screen for a moment, pressed a button or two, then casually came to stand in front of her.

Once they’d returned to the TARDIS’ relative warmth, both of them had quickly shuffled out of their coats. Rose had removed her hat and scarf, tossing them to the grating, to the Doctor’s grunt of disapproval, and he’d picked them up and draped them over the railing, next to where he’d put his jacket. She’d forgotten to laugh at him for it because he successfully distracted her by rolling up his shirtsleeves.

Two utterly delicious bare forearms appeared in her line of vision, now, and her magazine was whisked away.

“Hey, it’s rude to snatch,” she protested, folding her arms. “If you’d wanted to read ‘top ten tips for getting your man,’ you could’ve just asked.” She shot him a grin, triumphant, and he gave the article a cursory glance.

“You read this stuff?” he remarked, arching an eyebrow.

“Not usually. Dunno if it works on aliens, anyway.”

“Well, this magazine is from Dex Seven in the year 3029,” he pointed out, “So I suppose it depends on your definition of ‘aliens.’” He grinned back at her innocently, unfazed.

She’d have to be more blunt. “Time Lords,” she corrected casually, shrugging a shoulder, “Dunno if works on Time Lords.”

He read a paragraph or two, made a small noise of displeasure, and tossed the magazine over his shoulder.

“I take it that’s a no,” she laughed.

“I’m sure you could write a much more thorough, much more accurate top ten tips.” He plonked down next to her, extending his arm along the back of the jumpseat behind her.

God, she loved it when he let loose a little and flirted with her. He’d been getting steadily braver with it as the night had gone on. “Oh, you reckon?”

“Mmhmm.”

“Step one,” Rose considered. “Invite him to your friend’s wedding.”

He tilted his head, smothering a laugh. “Hmm, nah, don’t think that’ll work, sorry.”

“Step two, wear a sexy dress…”

“Well.” He basically conceded her that one, what with the way his eyes glazed over as he no doubt pictured her potential outfits.

“Three - direct him to the nibbles and cake.”

“Ah, you’re onto something.”

“Four...hmm. I know - pull him up on the dancefloor with you.”

The Doctor wrinkled his nose. “Oh, really Rose, and you were doing so well.”

“Right, but you’ll love it really, because, see…” She leant in close and said, conspiratorially, “If you dance with him, you’re not dancing with anyone else, and he’ll like that. And it means you’ll be pressed up against one another just like he dreams of.”

The Doctor smirked, tongue behind his teeth for a second, then corrected, “Well, not exactly like he dreams of.”

Rose was about to lean in and snog his face off again, but remembered that she’d better check it was still within the parameters of their...festive indulgence.

“Is it still Christmas?” she asked abruptly, and he blinked, so she repeated her question.

“We’ve not dematerialised yet, no, and when’s this wedding exactly? Christmastime, right? So we’ll head to London, and it’ll still be Christmas.”

“Yeah, the 22nd. Shareen only just realised that the invite she sent to us didn’t get passed on. Mum forgot.”

“Oh, bless Jackie. I was so close to getting out of it, and to think, your mother helped me! Alas.”

“Nah, Mum found the invite while she was putting the decorations up, and realised her mistake. She phoned Shareen and Shareen phoned me.”

“I like Jackie Tyler no longer,” he declared dramatically, then jumped up. “Right, let’s get this over with.”

“Wait, what? We’re going now?”

“Don’t you want to?”

“Well, no. It’s like, 11pm. We’ve had a long day, I’m not exactly up for a wedding right now. Can’t we just linger in the vortex for a bit while I get some sleep? Then I can get ready properly tomorrow before we head out. Shareen said we’re expected at Mum’s about noon, so we’ll get a lift with her and Bev.”

The Doctor groaned, again. It was starting to give Rose ideas, if she were honest. “Beverly is going, too? Oh, Rassilon help me.”

“What have you got against Bev?” Rose demanded, as she retrieved her magazine and winter outerwear to take back with her to her room. “She used to babysit me and Shareen when we were little, she’s a right laugh.”

“What have I got against Bev? What haven’t I got against Bev!”

He followed her when she started walking down the corridor to her bedroom, and she smiled to herself, already plotting how she could get him to linger in her doorway with her for a kiss goodnight.

He prattled on, listing on his fingers, “Firstly, the day after Boxing Day last year, she insulted my coat. Janis Joplin gave me this coat! Then, on New Year’s Eve - which, if you’ll remember, I stuck around for, purely for you - ”

“Not at all because you were still feeling a bit poorly after your regeneration and wanted the comfort of Mum’s cooking, then?”

“Certainly not,” he sniffed, but his reply was a second too late to be considered anything other than hesitant. “Anyway, on New Year’s Eve, while you, Rose Tyler, had swanned off somewhere, at midnight, probably to kiss some pretty boy or something - ”

“Hey! I did not. I was actually holding Keisha’s hair back while she threw up in the loo, thank you.” They reached her bedroom door, which was open, and she chucked her stuff through it onto her floor. He frowned at her, which she ignored, and they both leant against the doorframe.

“Oh. Well, good.”

“Good?”

“Mmm.” He looked very relieved.

“Has that seriously been playing on your mind all year? Whether I kissed someone that night?”

“Well, you didn’t kiss me.”

“So naturally, I must’ve kissed someone else?”

“Maybe,” he squeaked. “You kissed Mickey in front of me once. And Jack.” He huffed, momentary relief dismissed, apparently. “Probably Adam, too. Glad I didn’t notice that one. And who knows who else!”

“I don’t really fancy going over each other’s kiss list,” she said, rolling her eyes. “But what happened with Bev? I’m on the edge of my seat, here.”

“You’re standing up.”

“You know what I mean!”

“Oh, right, well, involuntarily, I assure you, I suppose she’d technically, inexplicably, horrifically, be on my ‘kiss list.’”

“Oh my god! Hahahaha,” Rose doubled over laughing.

“Excuse me, I don’t think being kissed against my will is particularly worthy of such a display of hilarity.”

Rose sobered, but couldn’t quite stop the corners of her mouth from twitching. “Right, sorry, you’re right. Was she drunk?”

“Yes. Exceedingly so.”

“Okay, well, I’ll make sure she behaves herself at this wedding, won’t let her near too many bottles of wine.”

“You’ll have a task on your hands, there.”

She patted his chest fondly. “I really am sorry, Doctor. I didn’t know she’d do that. Obviously. Wouldn’t have let her near you if I thought…” she trailed off when he started to smirk. “Not because I’d be jealous,” she assured him. “Just because I wouldn’t want you to be kissed against your will, of course.”

“Of course.”

“You won’t wanna stick around London for Christmas and New Year this time, then, I take it? If last year’s has such bad memories for you.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t say that - Beverly aside - my memories of last Christmas were particularly bad.”

“You regenerated, was in a coma, fought a Sycorax in borrowed pjs, and threw up from what you called ‘overstimulation’ on Boxing Day night.”

“The bright lights and all that food, Rose Tyler; it was quite a day for a newly regenerated me! But anyway, what’s your point?”

“Don’t all that seem like a pretty subpar Christmas to you?”

“Definitely not. This year could go better, certainly. But last year’s wasn’t bad. I had quite a lovely time.”

“Seriously.”

“Yes! Didn’t you?”

“Well...yeah,” she realised, thinking back. Apart from her confusion about the regeneration and missing the old Doctor like crazy, she’d been a bit giddy with it all, with the way he’d been with her, all silly and sexy and flirty and holding her hand and telling her he’d love her to travel with him and - “So, wait, we can stay with Mum for a bit, then?”

Caught by his own enthusiasm, she watched in amusement as his face contorted in displeasure, before he settled on a tentative, “I suppose.”

“Great!” She stood on tiptoes and spontaneously kissed his cheek. “Thanks, Doctor.”

“You’re welcome,” he said, but he sounded unsure about it.

“Don’t worry,” she assured him, “I’ll make that worth your while too.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” She glanced into her room. “I’d better get to bed. Gotta get up earlier than usual if I wanna be fit to be seen by all my old friends in posh frocks tomorrow.”

“No you don’t,” he said softly. “You could show up just like this and look better than all of them put together.”

Rose couldn’t help it - she blushed. It was cheesy as anything, what he said, but she blushed, because he looked like he genuinely meant it, and didn’t consider it cheesy at all. “To you, maybe,” she said, with an embarrassed laugh.

He shrugged, and they were silent for a few heartbeats. Then, just as she was wondering how to give him a hint, he miraculously did it for her. “So, still Christmas…”

She beamed at him. “Goodnight kiss is allowed, then, right? If it’s ‘cos of the...festivities.”

“Mm, yes, exactly. I’m glad we’re on the same page about this.”

“Me too.”

“In fact…” He dove into his pocket and pulled out a sprig of mistletoe, which he must’ve picked up with her hat in the console room, affixing it to the top of her doorway. “Better pop that there. Just to be sure.”

“Of course. Good plan.”

He pulled her into his arms and gave her a kiss goodnight so thorough that she felt it in her knees, which again, was cheesy as anything, but happened to be the truth.

#ficandchips #ten x rose #tenth doctor #rose tyler #doctor who #my fanfic

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