from the depth, to the shoreline

Summary:

Childe like to drown his feeling. Literally. After Osial, he frequently goes to lakes, usually Luhua Pool. Making sure no one is around before stepping into the water. He'll float a bit before taking a deep breath and let himself sink. Before, back in the abyss, inside the water is where he feels most safe, apart from his Master's side. But here in Liyue, there’s no Master. It aches something terrible in Ajax's chest, because Liyue used to be warm. It almost feels like home. But no more. So he returns to the water, where it feels more safe, much like a creature of the depth he truly is inside. When he emerges, everything will be muffled either from lack of oxygen or the after-effect of the underwater silence. There'll be dizziness, but it is worth it for the few moments in which he becomes one with hydro. Free from thoughts of his mission, about Zhongli, about Liyue. But of course, nothing lasts. Not for him. Ajax is never that lucky. One of Zhongli's Adepti saw him.

Chapter 1 : Seeking The Nostalgic Abyss

The winds blow softly, making a hypnotic sound and shaking the red leaves on the trees. Some of it falling into the water and creating a ripple. The motion of water and the reflected sunlight gives an illusion that something is shifting slightly. It enhances the mystery and beauty of Luhua Pool, giving no other obvious change despite currently hosting an extra person in its water.  

Childe— no, Ajax blankly stared at the overflowing blue around him, eyes absently focusing on some fish. His thoughts have been turning round and round, just like the fish in front of him. This fish appears to have taken a liking to him, twirling around and picking at his hair. It's a cute playful fish worthy to be pampered and Ajax usually will coo at it, but his mind is currently elsewhere. He just can't make sense of it.

‘How can Zhongli be Morax?’

Besides the ridiculous development that the God he has been searching for months is actually the same person that has been dining with him almost every day— ’How scary...’ Something in Ajax whispers. It sounds afraid and thrilled at the same time. How can he smile, tell stories and eat with him as if he doesn't have the power to fatally wound Ajax? Ajax bitterly realized how many openings he gave away. Zhongli is always so steady without changing his rhyme. It is a lulling sort of peace. He never did give a reaction when Ajax purposely tried to provoke and needle him at the start of their relationship. ‘What makes you think he won't kill you later?’, the voice whispers sweetly. —Ajax still can't wrap around his head that Zhongli is Morax. Klutzy with mora Zhongli, who can't cook quickly to save his life and always savor his tea like some kind of tea connoisseur? Keeping aside that (endearing) part of him and his own mixed feelings, Ajax it's genuinely confused. Wasn't Morax supposed to be a Warrior God? A fierce dragon that successfully defeated other Gods that threatened Liyue in the past? How can he be that unassuming consultant who seems to have an endless story to tell? From the few interactions Ajax has with dragons in Snezhnaya, they're always callous and cruel to other beings. They're powerful but arrogant, only holding themselves as a special existence. Even among their species they hold those pride and won’t associate with other dragons, seeing only themselves as the most important. It is that arrogance that makes their downfall. Childe always did have the most fun while fighting them. He always comes to that brink between life and death whenever he must deal with them. It is one of the reasons that makes him very excited when he is sent to Liyue. Unfortunately instead of the thrill and satisfying scars, what he got here is a wound that can’t be defended with his blade. It is a wound that does not cause his flesh to separate and tear, but still manages to be even more painful than that.

Because the wound is not physical. Surely even if the region is different, Liyue dragon will have some similarities? How can a person like Zhongli— Ah. Of course. Ajax wants to slam his head at the rock behind him. So he did. Letting out a few bubbles while at it. Turns out that having an epiphany underwater is a bad idea. Childe gasp as he burst out of the water and hold his bleeding head. Cursing he slowly trekked back to the land. He can't believe how stupid and careless this realization is. Morax's true form is said to be unknown. Although he is often depicted as a majestic dragon, there's a talk and record that said Morax is part Qilin. Of course, expecting him to act territorial like other dragons is a no-go! Childe wouldn't have wasted a few weeks messing around Adepti's domain if he know this! “Why is everyone obsessed with only the Dragon part? No wait, why didn't I think of that! “ Childe mutters furiously while walking back to the Northland Bank. Ignoring the whisper and suspicious stare thrown at him. Walking back to his room, he take out the files named [Beings to Fight in Liyue], flipping around until he got the section he want to.

Qilin. One of the illuminated beasts in Liyue, a creature with supernatural abilities, including heightened combat prowess, extreme longevity, and the ability to speak human language. The Qilin are gentle creatures who refuse to harm any animal, living a vegetarian lifestyle, with fur as soft as clouds. However, when they do not live in times of peace, they will fight.

“Huh, that makes so much sense.” Childe trailed off. Actually, he remembered halfway that in Liyue, a dragon is depicted as not only powerful but also wise, symbolizing both power and leadership. So even if Morax being part Qilin is not true, it still fits Zhongli's temperament. Still imagining him as a part of a gentle beast like Qilin makes it easier to connect Morax's identity with the man Childe once knew. But what use is knowing this fact now?

Suddenly the files in his hands become less interesting and feel even mocking to him. Childe silently closes it and put it back into the hidden compartment.

The next times Childe decides to sink himself, he stays under the water for much longer. If the first time he sinks into Liyue water was for the sake of ruminating and filtering the information that shook his world, then the times after that are purely for the sake of dealing with his emotion. To put it simply, Childe like to drown his feeling. Literally. After Osial, when he stays too long in Liyue Harbor, there's an urge to search for lakes. Usually, he will end up heading to Luhua Pools. It's because no one loiters there aside from a few treasure hoarders. The fact that the water is clean also makes it an easy choice, he likes to appreciate the view around him.

”Xiangsheng, you’re not joking when you said it's beautiful!” Childe can't help but gasp at his surrounding. He received a smile, before the man standing beside him replied with fondness that can be heard, eyes already looking from the start to see his reaction,  “Of course not, I did say I will bring you to the most wonderful place in Liyue. I’m glad, it seems you have taken a liking to this place?” “Yes! The water is very clean and the pools are fascinating too! Oh, I wish I can share this with Tonia, she would love it. I should’ve brought my kamera.” Childe cant help to lament. His princess always appreciates the scenery he encounters on his journey. This place might be one of the best places Childe has visited in Liyue. A hum of thought escape the man's mouth. His gaze is still fixated on the redhead instead of the beautiful scenery around him,  “Hmn, Tonia is your sister correct? Although I too, didn’t bring any kamera with me, there’s a talented painter named Veemer that recently looks for inspiration from this place. It is said that he likes to wander around here. Perhaps we can see if he got some painting you can buy for your sister.” “Huh.” “Huh?” Amber eyes look at him questioningly. Holding his laugh, Childe said with a grin,  “I mean, of course, you would know a painter that likes to wander around beautiful spots. Sure then! Let's walk around and maybe we will bump into him. You can tell me the stories about this place while at it.” A nod and a satisfied smile,  “My pleasure. Luhua Pools has been said to be an ancient garden made from deep pure affection. Although no one is sure whose affection it is and toward who that feeling is directed. Two statues stand tall near the pools as if guarding the garden. People have said that those statue eyes will light up sometimes—” “Can the statue move?! You think they’ll make a good fight?” Childe gasped in delight at the prospect of a fight. A startled laugh before, “Childe, please wait—”

It's not as if Ajax has other reasons to choose these pools. 

Full chapter on ao3