Tumgik
#my mini review: i like it for quick sculpting like this
racesundae · 8 months
Text
Tumblr media
chrome
146 notes · View notes
thiesen94shannon · 2 years
Text
replica kelly bag 23
Replica Hermes Birkin Kelly Bag Difference No fewer than 5 designers name-checked Giorgio Armani in review appointments. His blouson bomber jackets and Raf Simons’s MA-1s have reinvigorated curiosity within the silhouette, all bubbly and bulbous up prime. A solid aluminium rhino head by Christian Maas, signed and stamped 2/33. Christian Maas is a French sculptor who has been sculpting for the reason that 1980s. He is famend for his eccentricities with risqué subject matters and life-size Animalia in eye catching metals. At the beginning, because I changed locations, I didn’t purchase new Kelly directly, I bought it scorching. But I feel the poison of Hermes, I simply can’t like it! wikipedia handbags When it's rained, it will flip black first, then it goes to be nice if it is done. The final time I ate ramen, splashed a little soup, and the oil spot turned black on the bag eternally. Dior Book Tote bag in embroidered Dior Oblique canvas Carried within the hand or on the shoulderSiz.. Jewellery in aged goldtone metal Carried within the hand or on the shoulder .. Designed with rounded edges and a gentle form, the 1955 Horsebit tote bag is produced from GG Supreme can.. I bought two baggage, the first one is Replica Hermes Handbags Men’s Casual Steve Light Messenger Bag Black. And the back is very versatile, suitable for every kind of events, then my friend also bought a model that's precisely the same, the principle quality is also superb, there's actually no place to be choosy. I am sure we all can agree that the Hermes Birkin Togo just isn't a trendy bag, it's a timeless one. It is an simply recognizable and iconic mannequin that looks divine and expresses luxury and magnificence. Exactly due to this, when you can't afford the original one then you'll absolutely be tempted by the prospects of buying for a duplicate. New feedback are only accepted for three days from the date of publication. Gucci Bamboo Bags are supplied by Gucci at a relatively excessive price vary. It has become a style to have luxury objects when it... After all, the similarity is unusual; Even Togo leather has the proper texture (I actually suppose it’s the identical tannery Hermes uses) and the deal with is so sturdy. Just a quick notice about sturdiness, I truly have been utilizing my replica for about eight months, and its form is as strong as ever. Everything is shining, like the day it arrived, and there aren't any signs of wear and tear. Best Quality Hermes Bule Kelly Mini 31cm Bag, take a glance at this amazing Hermes Handbags! Best Quality Hermes Pink Kelly Mini 31cm Bag, try this wonderful Hermes Handbags! With its spectacular golden buckle within the type of the initials the initiales belt presents a width of four.. Guests will spot some acquainted options like the red letterbox, bone-shaped chimney and bay window. This two-night stay, for one household of 4, will happen from Friday February 18 to Sunday February 20 and cost AU$20. Airbnb says booking will open 15 February and it will go to whoever will get in first. Nestled on a quiet, tree-lined road in considered one of Brisbane’s most picturesque neighbourhoods, the house is a collaboration between Airbnb and BBC studios and took two years to build. This replica has so many key features of the unique bag. There are Pontet particulars which might be found on the sangles which echo the design of the Birkin bag. And the Birkin-esque flaps on the outside also make it a high-quality Hermes replica. Many folks could know the Birkin bag for having a superb style and being notoriously onerous to purchase – but not many people understand how the holy grail of handbags was created. The final giant quake on the Cascadia fault occurred on Jan. 26, 1700, scientists say. When together with smaller however still highly effective quakes on portions of the fault, the timeline in some areas shrinks to every 250 years. Even when the structure is accomplished, Ms. Nelson said, individuals will need to apply their escape plans and know the routes to potential security. https://re-pin.me/replicas-hermes-bags/replica-hermes-kelly-bag.html They need a bag ready to go along with key supplies — however not so many that it is going to sluggish them down when running for his or her lives. There won’t be time for hesitation or for determining which course to go. Listen reside on KEYN 103.7 FM and online at GoShockers.com/Listen. Division I school basketball's longest-tenured duo, Mike Kennedy and Dave Dahl are of their 41st season collectively on radio. Kennedy is in his 42nd season as Voice of the Shockers. I virtually always have access to my cellphone, but my schedule is wacky so my largest communication problem comes when folks text me around midnight and then I see it four hours later after I wake up.
0 notes
dndeed · 3 years
Text
Crit Role Miniature Rollout: C2E117
With Andrew Harshman
An archive and review of the minis used on CR.
Tumblr media
New episode is about to air, I better make this quick-  D&D is fun, what a fun session, use code DNDEED1220 for 10% off your Mats by Mars order, woh look out, there’s a big ol’ worm boy, it’s time for CRMRC2E117!
The List
Chest and Trove 5E Condition Rings
Mats by Mars: Winter's Wrath Tabletop Wargaming Play Mat
Dwarven Forge Caverns
Dwarven Forge Terrain Tray Ice Sheet/Cracked Ice
Steamforged Games Critical Role Miniatures
Hero Forge Custom XL Yasha Miniature
D&D Spell Effects: Halaster’s Tumultuous Templates
LITKO Flying Figure Stand
Steamforged Games Cat Claws
Reign of Winter - Monsters Encounter Pack Frost Worm
D&D® Icons of the Realms: Spell Effects: Mighty Conjurations Mordenkainen's Faithful Hound
Toy Turtle
Model Snow Found at Hobby Shops
Possible Model Train Boulders
Craft Foam Elevation Terrain
Piece of Glitter
The Heroes
Tumblr media
MechaYasha Hero Forge Custom XL Yasha Miniature
EDIT: Forgot to include enlarge Yasha in this post. Sort of slipped my mind I think because technically this HF mini already appeared on camera at the tail end of Episode 88:
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Wow, took over 100 episodes for this figure to officially be seen in-game. And as is tradition on CR, when a new PC miniature debuts, the camera is seemly unable to capture a good look at it. With any luck, we won’t have to wait another 100 episodes to see enlarged Yasha again.
The Monsters
Tumblr media
Ice Worm Reign of Winter - Monsters Encounter Pack Frost Worm
Contrary to popular Liam opinion, the ice and snow is actually part of the sculpt. I own this mini, it’s a good mini, you should also own it. The retail packaging has it bundled with a giant centaur, which is probably less useful to the average DM, but still very cool. Also would work as a serviceable purple worm. Not to be confused with Purple Worm Service, the wildly dangerous branch of the Xhorhasian military.
The Nonhuman Animals
Tumblr media
Bunny D&D® Icons of the Realms: Spell Effects: Mighty Conjurations Mordenkainen's Faithful Hound
I would say this mini works well as a bunny, except that there is a literal bunny in the Mighty Conjurations set this model is from. I mean, sure it’s a bunny with a unicorn horn, but pretty close. Sadly, it does not seem it was handy at the time of polymorph casting. As a model, this figure seems decent enough. I like the title, Mordenkainen’s Faithful Hound is basically “Mordenkainen’s Very Good Boy”.
Tumblr media
Turtle Turtle Toy
Animal toys are a staple of hobby shops and internets everywhere. I’d say it’s a pretty practical measure to have a handful of these on hand at any game table. In fact, everyone should just carry a few of these in their pocket at all times, ya never know when the Mighty Nein will use polymorph. The scale of this turtle is way off, but it’s chill. Polymorph minis don’t have to be perfect.
Closing Thoughts
New ep, get hyped!!1
#criticalroleminiaturerollout #critroleminiaturerollout
14 notes · View notes
tainbocuailnge · 5 years
Text
ive played all the story chapters and a bunch of side missions and tried out a handful of characters so now it’s time for The Official Lance Tainbocuailnge Review Of Fate/Extella Link if you’re like me and were kinda on the fence about buying it after extella massively let you down
tldr; gameplay is actually fun and varied with loads of different objectives and the same servant can be played in different ways so it doesn’t get boring. main story is a bit disjointed and most servants only have a quick cameo but it gets charlemagne’s plot beats down well enough and the silly everyone-knows-everyone banter is delightful. everything looks better, the world actually feels populated, and there’s a lot of care put into special interactions. link will not disappoint you like extella did
the gameplay has much more variation than just press button use moon drive repeat. you’ve got a mix of regular attacks that lead into various combos and active skills with cooldowns. each servant has like 7 of them, generally some combination of damage skills buffs and debuffs, and you can set 4 at once so there’s a degree of customisability to how you play each servant even within the fighting style they’re inherently geared towards. servants with similar regular movesets (like cu and scathach) still have decidedly different active skills so they don’t feel interchangeable. certain moves from servants that were already in extella are generally reused either at the end of some combo or as an active skill which for me goes a long way in still making it feel like the same game, just better
attacking builds moon drive meter, and fighting enemies while moon drive is active earns you np meter. this means you can use your np as often as you can charge it instead of the pathetic One time it was in extella and you can just blow up a whole sector without remorse. you can also end moon drive early with a weaker version of your noble phantasm. some active skills are labelled as class skills and if you use those in a combo against a servant you get the button mash attack that extella had. altogether it really gives the sense of an all-out servant battle
allied servants are much much much more proactive. they’ll actively go out and conquer sectors for you and will try to join you wherever you’re fighting the boss servant. if your allies are nearby more of your active skills will get the class skill property and they’ll join you in the button mash attack. before the battle you also set two support troops, who will randomly join in on your combos or defend you when you’re in a pinch. hakuno is also out on the field, so combat is much more a team effort than before
stage objectives are varied too, there’s field effects, map jamming, hunting down messengers before they can call for reinforcements, escorting allies to specific locations, waves of shadow servants, lancelot disguising himself, robin or lishu going invisible, iskandar or darius with endless armies, drake or gilles bombarding from afar, all often used in various combinations too. on top of that the extra stages will provide random additional challenges so even replaying the same stage will be different every time. 
there are four difficulties (that I’ve unlocked) but I haven’t tried any of the higher ones yet so I don’t know what they change to make it more difficult other than enemy level. there are like. i think at least 50 maybe even 100 extra stages to play after you’ve cleared the ~30 main story battles that continue until servant level 200 or something so there’s a lot to do even after you’ve gone through the story. servants unlock by clearing story battles and I didn’t realize this until very late and was very pissed off that the game wouldn’t let me use cu but that’s on me. the money is power system is still in place so you don’t have to manually train any new servant you want to try out you can just powerlevel them. install skills are also still in place and you do need to level servant bond if you want to use any decent number of those
there’s a pvp mode too but I haven’t tried it yet so no comment on that beyond i bet skilled lancelot players are The most annoying motherfuckers to fight against
graphics are a huge step up from extella. reused areas got a complete visual makeover while retaining the same feel. everyone’s models got spruced up and now they don’t look plastic anymore. there is an unreal amount of care put into sculpting karna’s asscrack. the ost actually slaps beyond the main theme this time as well as featuring some ol reliable CCC tracks. everything looks much more polished
the story is somewhat disjointed because of both the large cast and the splitting routes. the story splits up at various points to create an excuse to make different battles but it means a lot of things happen at approximately the same time in slightly different ways and it can be confusing to keep up with what happens in which order. for that reason I suggest looking closely at what path leads to which ending and playing all the quests of each converging branch before moving to the next day. the story seems to go out of its way to be ambiguous in when what happens exactly and how it’s even supposed to follow the events of extella so I think it’s best to look for the themes and the fun lore details over the linear coherence
overall the atmosphere is pretty silly and servants constantly banter back and forth even during tense situations, but it lands the occasional serious moment well enough imo. charlemagne and karl are the only ones who have any significant story focus but since they’re the only newcomers it’s not like the other guys particularly need the screentime. charlemagne himself is a pretty silly and lighthearted guy so he goes along well with the general feeling and it actually works in favour of his heavier plot beats because of the contrast. I grew attached to him incredibly quickly, not in the last place because he gets hyped about every single person he meets and it’s hard not to get excited too
the servants who weren’t already in extella generally get to show up more in the main story than the already familiar faces but most of them don’t have much more than a cameo. having a lot of people just randomly roam around with no idea what’s going on goes a really long way in making the moon cell feel populated beyond the people directly involved in the story so I actually like it a lot. they came up with like 3 different convenient plot devices to give you servants to fight without worrying about what that means for the alliances and it gives room for a lot of cool character moments
a good chunk of the extra stages come with their own mini stories told through the combat dialogue which adds to the liveliness of the setting. my favourite so far is the one where liz and nero try to hold a concert and hakuno frantically tries to explain to charlemagne in the middle of combat why it’s absolutely vital to keep them from doing that
everyone seems to know everyone so a lot of story dialogue is banter in varying degrees of playful versus vicious between both likely and unlikely combinations of servants and there’s a lot and i mean a LOT of care put into specific interactions. if two servants even remotely have an opinion on each other there’s special dialogue for it, and I even picked up unique dialogue for when archer acts as support troop for cu which no doubt means it exists for other combinations too (altho that’s not subtitled so i dont know what they’re saying there i could just tell it was the usual bickering because of the tone lol). some servants have unique win quotes from hakuno, she calls gilgamesh by his nickname ‘gorgeous’ for example. servants will sit around your home base and have a default line to say but sometimes they have lines that refer to each other instead. compared to how barren extella was, link is overflowing with the sense that these people have lives outside the current conflict and se.ra.ph is a thriving and vibrant world for them to live in
there’s a scene where karna and arjuna use their noble phantasms against each other in mutual destruction and it fucking RULES
45 notes · View notes
cchellacat · 5 years
Text
Thank You For Your Service:Pt3
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Wintershock: Bucky Barnes x Darcy Lewis
18 + For some smut.
Tumblr media
For the next week Darcy stuck to the confines of the Tower. It wasn’t hard, the place was a veritable mini city in it’s own right. The first floor was made up of two restaurants, a boutique and spa. Never let it be said that Tony would ever let anyone in his employ do without the essentials.  There was also a fantastic lending library on five, a gym for the Avengers personal use on sixty-five and an Olympic size pool on sub-level three.
She spent plenty of time stewing over the thought of him knowing who she was that first night, but eventually she admits to herself that he seemed shocked when Tony introduced them too.  She still made it her mission to avoid James Barnes at all costs though, she wasn’t ready to face him yet.
Every time he tried to track her down, she used the private elevator and Jarvis to circumvent his attempts.  Luckily Jane had left for a short trip to Culver to give some lectures, so Darcy wasn’t stuck in the labs where she knew she was all too easy to find.
The problem of Barnes as her bodyguard was keeping her from sleeping well.  She was still furious with him and pissed at Tony for making her comply, but she had went back and retrieved the tablet he’d left her and after reading through it she knew he had a point.  It still chaffed though. She had spent so much of her life looking out for herself that it went against everything in her to allow someone else, no matter how well meaning or right to dictate how she conducted herself.
The problem is that she is frustrated and confused by the sudden insistence.  She's been working at SI for two years without a bodyguard and only a light protection detail when she and Jane go to international conferences. Darcy is convinced the only reason Tony is insisting on a bodyguard now is because he found out she was his daughter.  Thor insisting on Jane having protection when he wasn't there makes far more sense, she is the future Queen of Asgard and he knows there are people who are opposed to Jane’s future status. Darcy is just a low level assistant, no one even knows about her blood connection to Tony.
She also spent some of the time the past week, researching him.  Oh, she knew the basics, everyone did, but what Shield and the Avengers allowed released to the public was far less than what she could get her hands on hacking the Tower servers.  Jarvis was good enough not to tattle on her, so there was that. After the confrontation in the elevator she had also had to get into Jarvis code and convince him to delete the footage of their hate fueled sexcapades, the last thing she wanted was Tony blowing a fuse because she got her freak on with Bucky Barnes.
She hadn’t been able to resist watching it before she deleted it though.  Watching them tear at each other was thrilling, it had been primal and raw. Seeing it from the outside, coupled with the memory of how it had felt, she had touched herself, coming harder by her own hand than she had in years.  It took her breath away to see him fuck her, to watch as all that raw strength, a body made and sculpted for war, held her effortlessly, taking her apart. She lost track of everything watching it, watching them, their reflections carrying into infinity as he claimed her.  It’s what it was, there’s no other way to describe how he took her, even as she claimed him back, teeth and nails marking him. She blushed seeing it, seeing her own wanton abandon.
Watching as her body arched into his and how she pulled on his hair, the grunts he made as she clenched around him had her cuming around her own fingers.  It made her ache to feel him again, to have him fill her with his cock and mutter filth in her ear the way he had. She watches his face when he makes her come, sees the awe and possession in his expression, the way he looks at her like he wants to keep her.  It’s how she knows that it isn’t just her imagination. There is something important between them, something visceral and deep.
He could have broken her if he’d been any less in command of himself.  She knew that now, understood and was thrilled by the thought of it. She’d seen the footage of the Winter Soldier on the bridge in DC.  He and Steve had been all out against each other on that highway and Barnes had held the upper hand, had been winning even before Steve realised who he was.  She was just a fragile human, the control he exerted over himself even as they lost themselves in angry lust had been absolute.
She’d stood in front of her bathroom mirror every evening and morning, fingers tracing over the bruises he had left and knows he could have broken her bones, but he hadn’t.  He’d left his mark, his fingerprints on her skin, blue and purple fading to green and yellow. When they were finally gone she had felt bereft. Part of her wanted those marks back on her body, claiming her, branding her. When he’d been inside her she’d felt whole in a way she’d never experienced before.  
Knowing his story better after pouring over the files only made her want him more.  She wanted to hate him, she really did, but he’d promised he hadn’t been following her, that meeting her had been just that, a coincidence.  She believed him, but that didn’t mean she was going to make this easy on him.
She’d eventually calmed down after everything and decided to beard the lion in his den.  The surprise on his face when she turned up at his office door had been genuine.
Tumblr media
Darcy  smiled nervously at him from the doorway before stepping inside. Bucky looked up at her knock and motioned for her to come in.  The office was utilitarian and almost empty, other than the desk and chairs. Book shelves lined one wall, bare and waiting to be filled, on the window sill was a large cacti, the kind you see in garden centers the world over.  She wonders who bought it for him, somehow knowing it’s not the sort of thing he would have chosen for himself.
“Hey.”  it’s all she manages to say.  Unsure of what you're meant to say to the guy who’s fucked you twice but whom you’ve never actually had a proper conversation with.  
“Darcy.”  He seems just as unsure of where they stand as she does.  He stood there, waiting until she sits down before retaking his seat.
The silence makes her edgy and she blurts out the first thing that comes to mind.
“Nice cactus... how’s it going?”
He spares the greenery a quick look of derision before turning his attention back to her.
“It’s good, getting through a review of personal and doing some additional background checks, I didn’t realise how much paperwork this damn job was going to involve.”
She smiles, fingers drumming against her thigh.
“You know this position comes with a PA, right?  Haven’t you found someone suitable from HR yet?”
“I guess  just haven’t gotten around to it yet.  Still a lot of things on the list, honestly I think I forgot with everything.”  he gestured vaguely at the boxes of files on the floor around his desk. “But, what can I do for you?”
“I umm, I wondered if you wanted to get a drink tonight.  Let me apologise for jumping to conclusions the other day.”
It’s as close as she’ll come to saying she was wrong for being so upset with him.  A peace offering and a date in one.
Bucky sighs and looks down at the desk, flicking an eye off to the side and the moving a file over the offending paper.  She holds her breath, thinking this was not the response she expected. She sees it coming even before he speaks.
“I’m sorry, but I can’t.  It wouldn’t be right.”
“Why not?  We’re both consenting adults, you’re not my employee and I don’t work for you…”
“It’s a conflict of interest Doll.”  he still won’t look her in the eye.
“Why are you so determined to keep me at arms length?  I’ve seen the employment contact Tony had you sign, there’s nothing stopping us from seeing each other.  I know I’m not wrong about this, you like me, I know you do.”
“You’re right, I do, but we still can’t do this.  I need to focus on my job, I can’t do that properly if we’re involved.  I don’t want to slip up and you get hurt.” he sounds sincere, but she’s known men who could do that even when they were lying, and right now he wasn’t telling her everything, she could feel it.
“So assign me my own protection detail.  I’ll follow the rules, not cause any trouble.  Tony won’t mind so long as I stick to the program.”
“I can’t do that, Tony asked me to be your personal security, I gave him my word, I’d never forgive myself if another Stark died when I could have stopped it.”
She feels the bottom drop out from underneath her.  More excuses, she’s an idiot, maybe he was interested enough to fuck her but not have a relationship. The thought tasted bitter in her mouth.
“You don’t have to lie to me, if you don’t want to go out with me.”
“Doll, it’s not like that, I do like you, I just…   I can’t trust anyone else with your safety.”
She stood quickly, and strode to the door, she had to get out of there. there is a clatter of the chair as he stands and comes after her.  It’s like the elevator all over again, he catches her before she can open the door, pulling her round to face him, she braces her hands on his chest, all too aware of his body only a hairs breath from her own.
“Darcy, please understand, it’s not about you, this is on me.”
“Then quit.  Tell Tony you can’t do it, tell him we already knew each other, that we want to date.  He’ll understand. You’re not responsible for me just because you played a hand in Howard and Maria’s deaths.  I never even knew them. Give me another security detail.”
His grip on her arms tightens briefly, she sees the conflict in his eyes.
“I’m not going to break my word.”
“No, but you’ll break my heart just fine.”
She pushed out of his hold and spun, leaving him behind.  This was not over.
Tumblr media
IT doesn’t make any sense.  Why would she merit the Winter Soldier as a bodyguard and not Jane? Why would she get the scary supersoldier when Jane is the bigger target of the two of them? There was something more going on, there had to be.  She just wishes she could figure out what. Until then, well. She knew now, from his reaction at the last, he definitely wants her, just as much as she wants him. She has to make him see she’s not going to give up.
If he wanted to be her bodyguard so badly, well, she’d make him jump through so many hoops and over so many obstacles he’d quit.  He was just as affected by her as she was by him, that much was clear, but she knew he’d resist letting anything happen between them while he was meant to be her protection. But she wanted him, badly. Badly enough that she’s prepared to tie the man in knots until he resigns as her bodyguard, because she knows in her soul she needs him, she wants to know if they could be something.
Tumblr media
The first time she decides to leave the Tower is Tuesday evening, there’s a great little pizza place in the East Village that she’s been dying to try out, she knows she should call him, tell him she’s going out, but she wants to know what will happen if she doesn’t.  So sue her, she’s always been too curious for her own good.
The trip down in the elevator is smooth as always but being in the small space, the memories of what he’d done to her push to the front of her mind.  When she gets off on the ground floor she’s wet and frustrated and ready to turn around and got back to her apartment and deal with the unexpected arousal.  Before she can call the lift back she spots him. She’s not sure if she’s surprised to see him, leather jacket and gloves on, standing by the front door of the lobby.  He looks good, the look he gives her and the small smirk enough to make desire and ire curl in her belly in equal measure. She squares her shoulders, unable to back down now and crosses the lobby at a clipped pace.
He doesn’t say anything as she marches past him, just opens the door for her and follows behind.
Darcy is hyper aware of him, just feet behind her to her left.  She refuses to turn a head and look at or acknowledge him, but part of her itches to sneak a peek, to take in how fucking pretty he looked.  The whole trip goes off without a hitch, he trails after her, she grabs some dinner and then he follows her back.
The little trip out served its purpose, he knows when she’s leaving, good.  The next three days she randomly pops out of the tower on a ridiculous number of errands that have her all over New York.  She can see the irritation building in him, the way his gaze narrows as her smiles become sunnier and sunnier. She takes a deep satisfaction in making him follow her from lingerie shop to lingerie shop, dumping the many bags she exits with into his arms.
Tumblr media
It’s day four of “Drive Barnes into Early Retirement”.  She set her alarm for 3:45am. There’s a 24 hour lending library halfway across the city she likes and she’s already booked her Uber.  She wonders what he’ll make of this trip. By her calculations he would be in bed right now, sleeping. Jarvis would alert him of her intention to leave, she can’t wait to see if he can catch her before she makes it into the Uber.
She had slept in her clothes, so grabs her purse and coat and high tales it out of her apartment and into the elevator.
When she reaches the lobby he’s not there.  She only hesitates for a moment before striding outside, looking for her ride.  It’s not there yet. She stamps her feet against the chill and checks her phone impatiently.
She thinks she should feel less surprised than she is when a black SUV pulls up and Barnes rolls down the window.
“Get in.”  it’s terse and strained and she can see the dark circles under his eyes.  For a second she feels at least a little guilty for running him so ragged but then stamps it down.
The drive to the library is tense and silent.  She looks out the window and resolutely ignores him, scrambling out of the car when they arrive and hurrying inside before he can do something dumb, like open the door for her.
Inside she scurries away till she finds the section she wants and peers at the titles.  She can feel him watching her at first as she wanders the stacks. Eventually she gathers the books she wanted and finds a nook to sit and read in.  He takes up the chair opposite her and sits with a book of his own.
For the next hour she reads without much focus, finding herself going over the words three of four times before giving up.  When she looks over at him he’s slumped in the seat, book closed in one hand and his eyes shut. Again, the traitorous feeling of guilt creeps in.  She knows he’s been working hard the last two weeks, increasing security for the Tower, putting new protocols in place, reviewing the existing personnel and a whole slew of other things, she hasn’t made any of it easier on him.
The thing is though, it stung.  She wasn’t good at handling rejection, even when it came from good place.  He’s trying to do the right thing. Keeping his work and personal life separate.  She gets it, but it’s frankly ridiculous. He’s already slept with her, twice, not that she could call it sleeping.  She finds herself staring at hm again, in all honesty he is hard to look away from. Fuck he looked cute like that, all soft and warm and vulnerable looking. There was a tiny little frown line between his eyes, she wanted to smooth it out and kiss his brow, take away whatever was making him anxious.  Then again, she’s probably the cause of it. She sighs and waits. She’s not going to wake him up yet.
The light slowly filters into the space as the sun rises and she keeps watch wondering if she should rethink this whole thing.  It’s nearly seven when she finally reaslies she’ll have to wake him if they want to be back at the Tower and have time to get ready before work.  Jane is back today too, so Darcy knows she’ll have a heap of work of her own waiting in the lab.
She puts the books she chose back on their shelves and grabs the one he was holding too, it had dropped to the floor an hour earlier, but he hadn’t stirred, he must have been really tired.
She tries waking him gently, just calling his name, but he’s out for the count.  Giving up she places a hand on his shoulder to shake him and suddenly finds herself held down across his lap, his hand at her throat, his eyes wide and blue, inches from hers.  His grip goes slack immediately, she can see the horror in his expression and she grabs the bionic hand at her neck, holding it against her chest.
“I’m fine, I know better, I won’t wake you like that again.”
For a moment everything is still and then he closes his eyes and rests his forehead to hers.
“I could have killed you.”
“You didn’t.  You didn’t even hurt me, just restrained me.  I’m fine, see?”
She keeps her tone light and reaches a tentative hand up to cup his jaw, her thumb brushing against the growth of stubble on his cheek.  This close she can clearly see the grey creeping through the dark, it's adorable and so human she wants to coo.  
He opens his eyes again and she feels lost looking into them. She thinks she can see everything in the blue, every thought that crosses his mind seems to be reflected there.  Guilt, remorse, frustration, gratitude… the heat rapidly creeping into his gaze sends a frisson of desire through her, skin prickling, nipples hardening and warmth pools in her belly.  
He’s going to kiss her, she can feel it in her bones, sees the way his eyes drop to her lips and back again and she grips his shoulder even as he heart starts to pound.  
Why does it feel like this with him? It’s the only thing she has time to wonder before his lips meet hers. Soft and warm, moving over hers, the kiss is gentle, slow.  Full of something unknowable and dark. His hands grip her waist, pulling her up till she’s sitting in his lap, his mouth coaxing hers open, one brush a time.
The first swipe of his tongue at the seam of her lips leaves her gasping.  He kisses her with the sort of focus that wipes all thought from her mind, makes her weak all over and has her mewling like a kitten with each stroke of tongue to hers.   All she can feel is him, the restrained strength and power under her hands, the taste him on her tongue as he plunders her mouth.  She wants to crawl inside his skin, wants to put aside the past two weeks and start over, right here, now.
Her body already knows his touch, it sings under his hands, as he runs his fingers under the hem of her shirt, skimming over her skin, pulling her closer.  She finds herself with her hands in his hair, soft and curling at the ends as she tugs on it gently, the tiny little growls of need he makes when she does it, brings a curl of a smile to her lips.  This is everything she wants with him. Heady kisses that last forever, wandering hands and the smell of him, deep and earthy saturating the sheets of her bed. She curls into him, to his warmth and sighs some more as he makes love to her with his mouth. She’d forgotten what just kissing was like, how good it could be, how meaningful.
The sudden and insistent ringing of his phone interrupts them.  He pulls back from her, both of them a little breathless, but she sees the regret begin to set into his expression and pushes off his lap, standing and grabbing her purse and coat.  It’s like being doused in ice water, the abrupt turn from something deep and warm to the cold indifference of his rejection, hollowing out her soul, leaving her empty. She’s vaguely aware of him answering the phone, of the gruff impatience in his voice as he talks to whoever is on the other end. She uses the brief few moments to pull herself back together, to plaster a facade of calm nonchalance over the bitter burning sting of his regret. She won’t let him see how much it hurts, won’t let him see how close she is to begging for him like some love sick ninny.
“You ready to go?”
She doesn’t turn, can’t bare to look at him and see that same dismissal again.  She just nods and makes her way out to the car, once again hyper aware of him only feet away.
In the SUV she jams a finger at the radio and switches till the sound of Eric Clapton comes loud over the speakers.
“We can’t keep doing this Darcy.”  
She wishes he didn’t sound so vulnerable, his voice bordering pleading in it’s tone.  It gets her back up, sours her mood still further. God, he made her feel so much. Being in his orbit was enough to give her emotional whiplash.  Why was he denying this? Them? She knew something had changed again in that library, something more growing in the space between them. Part of her wanted to rip it out and kill it before it grew, afraid he would only hurt her more.  When he reaches for her hand she draws it back quickly. How dare he try to touch her after that? After ending things before they began, again.
“We, can’t?”  She questions waspishly, staring straight ahead, denying him the ability to read her eyes and see the truth..  “I’m not the one going around kissing people, that was you, remember?”
From the corner of her eye she sees his grip tighten on the wheel, flesh hand going white at the knuckles from the pressure.
“You’re right.  It’s on me. It won’t happen again.”
She thinks he believes what he says, but she knows better.  The air between them still full of tension. Darcy digs her nails into her palms, counts in her head to ten, then fifty before slowly releasing a breath she had been holding and loosening her fists.  She needs time to pull back and reassess. Maybe this whole thing was a mistake, and she was making it worse. Perhaps he was right, and they should be nothing more than client and bodyguard.
“I’ll email you my schedule this afternoon, so you know when I’ll need you.  I probably won’t be going out much. Jane’s back today, so you’ll be rid of me for a few days.”
She keeps her tone as impersonal as possible, but a small sliver of bitterness underlays it.
“I don’t mind taking you wherever you want to go Darcy.”
“Miss Lewis.”
It slips out, hard and absolute.  She glances at him long enough to watch his jaw tighten and the flash of hurt in his eyes.  If he wants this to be nothing more than a business relationship he can treat all of it as such.
“Yes Miss Lewis.”
She doesn’t flinch when her name leaves his lips, coated in rime and cutting the air between them like diamond.  She wants to throw up, the sickening feeling of loss she’s brought on herself a leaden weight of doom in her gut.
Nothing else is or needs to be said.  When they get back, they go their separate ways.  He opens the car door for her, standing at attention as she alights and brushes past him, her legs feeling like jelly even as she forces herself to walk confidently into the lobby and into the elevator.  The damned elevator with its mirrors and memories reflected in them to infinity. She spots him briefly at the security desk before the doors close, his face a grim mask, his eyes hard. They flick up for one agonising moment to meet her own and her lips tighten in pain.  She wants to lash out, to scream. This is his fault, he’s the one that started it, kissing her after saying he couldn’t, can he blame her for feeling angry, for giving him what he wanted? The doors close and all she’s left with is her own face, pale of colour, even her lips bleeding white are the edges.  She feels like she’s fighting a losing battle, her body and heart and mind all wanting something different. She needs help.
Darcy gets back to her apartment to find Jane in her kitchen, coffee on and a bright box of pastries on the counter.  The look of concern on Jane’s face when she sees her has the bubbling sob Darcy had been holding in bursting out before the door can close behind her.  She throws herself into Jane’s arms and clings.
“Oh Darcy, Honey, it’s okay, I’m here, I’ve got you. Tell me everything.”
The soft words are exactly what she needed, the whole story falling out between angry tears and gut-wrenching sobs.  She is so glad her friend is back. Jane will help her, Jane will be her rock. The two women had relied on each other for so long that Darcy formed the sort of strong connection with Jane she thought she would feel if she’d had a sister.  
They spend the rest of the day on the couch, work forgotten as they pick thought the events, trying to figure out what it meant.  Jane always the voice of reason, grounds her, gives her hope. She holds onto it carefully. There was more going on, Jane thought so to. Now she just had to figure out what. 
Tagging: @eurynome827  @omnomsauruswrites  @thesaltyduchess  @spacemansam   @book-dragon-13  @loricameback  @jobean12-blog  @sallycanwait68  @lookwhatyoumademequeue  @letstalkaboutsebbaby  @thatgirlkei  @marvelousmeggi  @grimeysociety  @msruchita  @southerncross47
@libbymouse  @randomlittleimp  @slytherinstarkravingmad 
if anyone wants tagged for the next chapters let me know,
102 notes · View notes
Text
Book Review: The Lies of Locke Lamora
by Wardog
Wednesday, 14 November 2007
Wardog actually likes something - possibly because she didn't have to pay for it.~
Father Chains sat on the roof of the House of Perelandro, staring down at the astonishingly arrogant fourteen-year-old that he little orphan he'd purchased so many years before from the Thiefmaker of Shades' Hill had become. "Some day, Locke Lamora," he said, "some day, you're going to fuck up so magnificently, so ambitiously, so overwhelmingly that the sky will light up and the moons will spin and the gods themselves will shit comets with glee. And I just hope I'm still around to see it." "Oh, please," said Locke. "It'll never happen."
The Lies of Locke Lamora is basically a fantasy-heist novel, but it's also a pleasant breeze through a stale genre (yes, I'm bitter), shorter than the typical eighty million pages and a surprisingly assured and competent debut. I picked it up in Hay on Wye for a sum so ludicrously trifling (a mere one of my English pounds) that it almost felt as if Scott Lynch had come up to me in the street and asked me nicely to read his novel, the consequence of which is that my critical objectivity is shot to buggery but I think I'd still be recommending this if I'd forked out the
requisite 7.99.
Locke Lamora - otherwise known as the Thorn of Camorr - is the leader of a tightly knit group of conmen-thieves known as the Gentleman Bastards. As the novel kicks off, they are in the process of scamming a couple of aristocrats out of a portion of their fortune, coincidentally violating the long-standing Secret Peace that has been negotiated between the criminal underworld and the upper echelons of society. Meanwhile a mysterious personage known as the Grey King is preying upon the thieves of Camorr and forces Locke to participate in his personal vendetta against the city's crimelord Capa Barsavi. Needless to say, events soon spiral massively out of Locke's control and he finds himself caught up in something that threatens not only the people he cares for but the entire stability of the city. The first third of the book is a rompish heist, complete with all the usual twists and turns, but then it twists on its axis becoming a much darker and more serious story, although it never loses the edge of gallows-humour that makes it such a pleasure to read.
The Lies of Locke Lamora is a truly a rootless, bastard child of the genre: there's a fair mixing of Feist, Gavriel Kay, Brust, Miville, Pratchett and Dickens to be found within, to say nothing of the more than passing nods to movies like The Godfather, The Sting, Oceans 11, Scar Face and Goodfellas. It's not flawless, but it's still damn good: a fast-paced, page-turning adventure story set in a complex and intriguing world that doesn't drown you in detail (although I expect the author will soon forget this and commence the deluge). Camorr provides an excellent backdrop for Lamora's exploits: an island city built of Elderglass by a race nobody remembers, it seems to be inspired by 16th century Venice, with all the attendant squalor and decadence. There's definitely world-building going on but its of the subtle kind that successfully creates the impression of a living and very real city without racking up a page count hefty enough to kill a walrus (*cough* Miville *cough*). Lynch's imagination encompasses both beauty and brutality, dancing easily from the banal to the opulent, from frivolity to genuine threat. One of my favourite chapters introduces the fencing master, Don Maranzella in his House of Glass Roses:
"Here was an entire rose garden, wall after all, of perfect petals and stems and thorns, silent and scentless and alive with reflected fire, for it was all carved from Elderglass, a hundred thousand blossoms, perfect down to the tiniest thorn ... ... each wall of roses was actually transparent .... Yet there were patches of genuine colour here and there in the hearts of the sculptures, swirled masses of reddish-brown transulence like clouds of rust-coloured smoke frozen in ice. These clouds were human blood.
I can forgive Lynch for lingering in his fairytale garden of blood-thirsty roses and his farmer-turned-fencing master is a wonderful antidote to all those artistic gentlemanly types with their flourishing rapiers. This chapter seems to illustrate Lynch at his very best - the strange, sculpted roses and the introduction of the fencing master, the shift from pretension to pragmatism, from description to dialogue, from fantastical lyricism to dark humour and the sudden stripped-down truth about what Jean Tannen has really come to learn:
"Jean, you misunderstand." Maranzella kicked idly at the toy rapier and it clattered across the tiles of the roof top. "Those prancing little pants-wetters come here to learn the colourful and gentlemanly art of fencing, with its many sporting limitations and its proscriptions against dishonourable engagements. You, on the other hand," he said, as he turned to give Jean a firm but friendly poke in the centre of his forehead, "you are going to learn how to kill men with a sword."
The book itself is interestingly structured - it reminds me rather of Heroes, in fact. It consists of a succession of short chapters building to a mini-climax, followed by a brief interlude, either a tale of the City and its Gods, or a flashback to the early years and training of Locke and his gang. This actually works really well. The interludes are generally absorbing enough that, even though I was eager to find out what was going to happen next, I didn't skip them or resent reading them ... at least not very much. Furthermore, most of the interludes, although not precisely relevant, often offer an illumination on future events, thus rewarding the alert reader. And it does solve the perennial fantasy book problem of how to introduce the hero to the reader and show his gradual development from child to adult without spending the first five hundred pages of the novel narrating every little moment of the hero's childhood in agonisingly tedious detail. Part of me, however, couldn't quite shake the conviction that it was a cheap trick. It's a very obvious way to build tension and create anxiety and uncertainty in the reader and occasionally interferes with the pacing at critical moments.
Lynch's is a self-consciously "dark" world; there's an awful lot of swearing and torture, and the central characters are, of course, thieves and murderers. But since we only ever see them stealing from the rich and murdering those who thoroughly deserve it and their loyalty to each other is unswerving, there's never really any question of their being admirable characters deep down. This is not a problem per se; but the book is about as morally ambiguous as my Grandmother:
"I only steal because my dear old family needs the money to live!" Locke Lamora made this proclamation with his wine glass held high ... ... the others began to jeer. "Liar!" they chorused "I only steal because this wicked world won't let me work an honest trade!" Calo cried, hoisting his own glass. "LIAR!" "I only steal," said Jean, "because I've temporarily fallen in with bad company." "LIAR!" At last the ritual came to Bug; the boy raised his glass a bit shakily and yelled, "I only steal because it's heaps of fucking fun!" "BASTARD!"
Stealing may be wrong but it's also big and clever and all the cool kids are doing it. The exuberance and loyalty of the Gentleman Bastards is charming and it's impossible not to root for them. On the other hand, I am conscious of a vague dissatisfaction with Locke. The book is careful to assert that he is skinny and unremarkable and a poor fighter but he is also a consummate conman with incredible reserves of tenacity and courage, he is cunning, daring and quick-thinking, and there is no sacrifice he will not consider to preserve the safety of his friends and loved ones. He can be ruthless when necessary, he has the survival instincts of a rat, he's reckless occasionally but only in a way we're meant to think is cool and, on top of all this, he has a conscience and listens to it. Needless to say his origins are shrouded in mystery (I'm sure this will be Very Important later) and his creator is head over heels in love with him. I came dangerously close to finding the character annoying and if Lynch isn't careful he's going to be unbearable a couple of books down the line.
Speaking of the dreaded "couple of books down the line" The Lies of Locke Lamora does a reasonable job of offering a coherent and contained plot arc, but there are several dangling threads (the most irritating of which is Locke's love interest, a woman occasionally mentioned but never introduced) presumably left there to wet the appetite for future books. The mighty internet tells me there will be seven of these, which triggers all my cringe mechanisms. This cannot end well. Has nobody learned anything from JK Rowling?
The second book of the septad, Red Seas Under Red Skies, has recently been released - having enjoyed the first book has much as I did, I'm now terrified to read the second in case it sucks. I guess I'll have to wait until it's available for 1 again. But, in the meantime, you could do worse than taking a look at The Lies of Locke Lamora. It's not perfect - Mary Sue-ish main character, a plot necessitated, damn near omnipotent bondsmage - and I understand it has received some criticism for its modern-sounding speech but, quite frankly, I found that contributed to the lively, irreverent tone of the book. But it is a fun, fast-paced read in a ponderous genre and I thoroughly enjoyed it.
PS - This is really childish (and has nothing to do with the review at all) but I think I also need to point out that Scott Lynch looks like this --->: 
Tumblr media
Arthur B
at 17:09 on 2007-11-14I was toying with doing a Reading Canary for this one, and might still do if I get around to picking up
Red Seas
, but you seem to have covered most of the bases. I agree that criticising the book for modern-sounding speech is reaching a little - if an author's simply more comfortable writing dialogue in a modern style then I'd rather they did that than attempt to try Ye Olde Speeche and fail horribly. I also agree that Lynch is a little too in love with Lamora, and indeed most of the book's fans are a little too much in love with Lamora; the fun of the book comes when Locke screws up horribly, and if you look at it objectively he isn't actually as nice a guy as Lynch thinks he is. That's why the book works, of course: the big central conflict is about accepting a rotten compromise which causes suffering for a few but provides peace and security for many, or rejecting that compromise knowing full well that rejection means no peace or security for anyone, and it's good that the representatives of both sides have their good and bad points.
The big criticism I'd have is that all the flashback bits to their childhood simply weren't as interesting to me as the main story: I'd much rather have a book half the length without the flashbacks. It doesn't matter whether Jean was taught swordplay by a farmer-turned-toff in a blood garden or by a toff-turned-farmer in a turnip patch: I can't think of any instance in the main storyline where it becomes at all relevant. There is one flashback which nicely foreshadows the final conflict, but it does so by basically explaining what Locke's tactic is going to be, so the ending is a bit obvious. Also, yes, big smirking long-haired Scott Lynch wants to kiss big smirking long-haired Locke, a meeting of shit-eating grins which thankfully cannot actually occur in real life.
Thing is, I'm not sure whether I'll ever actually get around to picking up
Red Seas
. I picked up
Lies
second-hand too, and while it's a fun and consistently not-crap read it isn't quite good enough to force me to go buy the new one. I'm not convinced that the character merits more than one book about him.
permalink
-
go to top
empink
at 00:01 on 2007-11-15@ Arthur
For now, I'd say not to bother with Red Seas. It's also a fairly consitently not-crap read, but imho the author's love for his character really burns strong in the sequel. I don't know why I couldn't put my finger on it when I read it, but Kyra hits the nail on the head here. He really, really loves this character of his, and it means he gets to do all kinds of improbably cool stuff.
Now, while that was fun in the first book, it starts to wear on you in the second one. The dialogue needs to be beaten with the boring stick (I swear, everything everyone says is so witty that you WISH someone would say something dumb at some point. Which they don't. ARGH), and the plot is just...stretchy, in terms of suspension of disbelief.
All I know to say is that, having read Red Seas, I'm not going to jones for the rest of the series anywhere as near as I am jonesing for one or two others, because it probably won't be worth it.
PS, Kyra, the mysterious woman never actually shows up in Red Seas. But she does get mentioned. A LOT. *facepalm*
permalink
-
go to top
Wardog
at 09:22 on 2007-11-15ACtually my copy of Lies was brand, spanking new and still one pound - that's why I'm so smug about it. I LOVE you Hay on Wye!
Ahem, anyway. I actually found Locke irritatingly virtuous. Even when he's trying to get a suit of clothes, and he drops an innocent waiter into the shit, he still takes time extract said waiter *and* give him a purse containing more money he's ever held in his life. Until that point I was actually impressed that he'd completely fucked up the waiter's life - it made him less sympathetic but I think, perhaps, more interesting?
I genuinely didn't mind the flashbacks and interludes; they weren't *quite* as interesting as the main plot but I didn't find them sufficiently tedious that they detracted from it too badly. And I was oddly into Jean Tannen (even though he's basically just a side-kick protector for Locke)so I really loved the stuff in the House of Glass Roses; also it is relevant because it "explains" why Jean can take out the two shark-baiting sisters without getting completely mullered.
And thanks for the warnings, Empink, I very very nearly bought a full-price copy of Red Seas the other day and I'm now *so glad* I didn't. I'm not sure I can stand another book of love-interest build-up because you just *know* she won't live up to it. And I don't wish to see Lynch consummating his relationship with Locke in an orgy of cool stunts.
I did find Lies genuinely witty but mainly because the characters tended to say something deeply pragmatic or macabre or just plain inappropriate at what would otherwise be very serious moments. It helped me get through the nasty bits (becuase I'm a wimp) and it also tended to have a nice edge of desperation to it - whereas I don't think I *want* a dazzling virtuoso wit-fest from the Book II.
permalink
-
go to top
Arthur B
at 12:19 on 2007-11-15Empink:
I'd been wondering what I'd found weird about the dialogue in
Lies
, but you've put your finger on it: everybody's a smartarse. I can remember a couple of times where I was having trouble following conversations, because everyone's dialogue is so similar in tone and delivery that there's little differentiating them. It feels less like a bunch of different people are having a conversation and more like Lynch has a bunch of sockpuppets that he's using to tell a story - you never forget that it's Lynch behind all of them. (Still, at least it is monotonous in a clever and witty and entertaining way as opposed to monotonous in a consistently dumb and boring way.)
Kyra:
You're right about the overvirtuousness. I was remembering the bit where he wrecks the waiter's life, but not the part where he makes it all better. I think the worst thing he does in the entire book is play a practical joke on the secret police (you know, the one with the boats full of shit).
I like Jean too, but I worry that I only like him because he's a floating bit of driftwood in an ocean of Locke; he's the only other interesting character we spend an extended amount of time with (though I also liked the Capa's daughter and the Grey King and the head of the secret police), so he's a welcome relief from an unending shower of Lamora-love. As far as the Glass Roses stuff explaining the shark sisters fight, I consider "Jean is a rock-hard son of a bitch" to be a more than adequate explanation for why he beat them. Jean being a rock-hard son of a bitch is neatly demonstrated in the main story by, well, Jean beating the shark sisters...
Both of ye:
I think it's fairly obvious at this point that the Mysterious Love Interest is, in fact, Scott Lynch in a dress.
Either that, or she'll be the big bad at the end of the series.
Possibly the big bad will be Scott Lynch in a dress.
The intersection of Lynchsmirk and Lamoracock providing the cure to the world's ills.
permalink
-
go to top
Wardog
at 14:18 on 2007-11-15I actually thought the dialogue in Lies was just about cope-able with - it's true that everyone sounds nearly the same but that genuinely didn't bother me except occasionally when Locke was conversing with arisocrats and then it grated somewhat. Dona Sofia, for example, is clearly meant to have a distinct and feisty personality with her alchemy and everything - but I never really got much from her. I think I was just glad to have snappy, modern-sounding dialogue for a change, instead of ponderous faux-medieval stuff.
But Jean was a fat, weepy merchant's son - he had to go from that to RHSOFAB somehow; sure, you didn't need to really know how but since these two sisters were meant to be *all that* it wouldn't have made sense for some thiefly-brawler to be able to take them out.
I still feel positive about Lies, despite its flaws. You were obviously considerably more irritated by the Locke-Lovin' than I was. And Lynch isn't the most talented ventriloquist but I didn't feel him in the background as much as you did either. I shouldn't have put up the picture, I think I've just generated undue hostility by drawing attention to the fact he looks like the sort of person we know.
But I genuinely think Lies stands as a good fantasy read; future books, well, we'll see...
permalink
-
go to top
Wardog
at 14:21 on 2007-11-15Also, I think Arthur is just being discriminating because Lynch isn't a hottie like
Gene Wolfe
;)
permalink
-
go to top
Arthur B
at 14:57 on 2007-11-15
But Jean was a fat, weepy merchant's son - he had to go from that to RHSOFAB somehow; sure, you didn't need to really know how but since these two sisters were meant to be *all that* it wouldn't have made sense for some thiefly-brawler to be able to take them out.
Yeah, but we only know that because of the flashbacks, so Lynch ends up setting up a problem which he then feels that he needs to solve with more flashbacks. It'd be more interesting, to me, if he'd established the sonofabitchness of Jean early on, and then dropped hints through the main action that Jean actually comes from a softer, more pudding-like background. I honestly don't think it matters at all, to
Lies
, how Jean got hard - I think most readers can happily accept that a life on the streets as a criminal will tend to make people either sneaky or fighty, regardless of their background.
My worry is that Lynch felt the need to dump all the backstory with Chains and the farmer-turned-toff and the farmer-who-ended-up-a-farmer-again because he's got this big backstory he wants to hint at which is suddenly going to becoming very relevant in the later novels, in a kind of "James Potter was mean to Snape at school" kind of way. And who's willing to bet that this is going to tie in with Long Lost Bint somehow?
Don't worry about the photo, I'd probably be saying the same sort of things about the novel even if Lynch looked like my beloved Wolfe - although it's a lot funnier knowing that Lynch looks like that. I do think it's a fun, likeable novel and worth reading for entertainment; most of my problems stem from my impression that Lynch wants us to think it's something more than that. Then again, maybe I've been spoiled by
Vlad Taltos
, who pushes similar buttons and whose writer looks like
the bastard son of Terry Pratchett and Frank Zappa
.
permalink
-
go to top
Wardog
at 15:12 on 2007-11-15Jesus CHRIST! *faints*
Yeah, I think you might be right about Jean; I guess it depends how much we care that this stuff is going to become Meaningful later. JKR has soured me on that sort of thing forever.
permalink
-
go to top
Arthur B
at 15:38 on 2007-11-15Is that you swooning before the dreamy gaze of Brust?
permalink
-
go to top
Alice
at 22:21 on 2013-08-28Necro-ing this post, since I've finally gotten round to reading the book after finding the post via the random button.
I mostly more or less enjoyed it, in an "oh, must you really, Scott Lynch?" sort of way - I actually enjoyed the backstory parts more than the main plot, perhaps because while Lynch SUPER-UNSUBTLY wrote out Locke's love interest right from the beginning, at least he didn't have her murdered and delivered to her father in a barrel of horse urine in order to kick off the main plot.
(That was the bit that really made me roll my eyes and give up on enjoying the book in anything other than a superficial way. Lynch slightly redeems himself by having the head of the secret police be a badass old lady with a cane, but I really liked Nazca, I thought she was cool, so I was extra annoyed when she got fridged.)
I really like Jean Tannen, though, so part of me is tempted to at least give book 2 a go.
permalink
-
go to top
Robinson L
at 15:30 on 2016-10-05Listened to this one on audiobook several months back, and enjoyed it as a fantasy heist/adventure yarn; it was quite fun. I hope it wasn't Lynch's intention for me to read any deeper meaning into it, because I really doubt it would hold up to that kind of scrutiny, and it would raise a bunch of awkward questions I don't think he's prepared to answer.
I was a bit disappointed by the ending, because the best bits of the book are generally when somebody is executing a masterful con: whereas Locke spends the last few chapters of
Lies
alternately pleading, cajoling, and punching his way to victory.
I guess I didn't mind too much Locke being both an authorial darling and a hyper-competent master criminal, because, as Arthur pointed out in his original comment, he regularly screws up, finds himself outsmarted or outmaneuvered, and generally gets the everloving shit kicked out of him and/or reduced to a blubbering wreck. For me, this was enough to make the balance tip over into “enjoyable” protagonist rather than “insufferable,” though I realize folks' mileage will vary.
I also really liked the character of Father Chains. The samey-ness of all the characters' dialogue has been brought up already, and I just kind of shrugged it off—however, even with that, I feel like Chains got in an inordinate amount of memorable lines. Also, for some reason, the character of a hard-cussin' scoundrel priest really appeals to me. (Technically, Locke is one, too, but his priestliness is kept mostly to the background.)
I was also disappointed they didn't wind up causing the death of the Bonds Mage (perhaps by accident). As arc plots go, “high class thieves on the run from an immensely powerful and vindictive wizards' guild” sounds pretty solid, and could justify the seven book length to show how our heroes go from fleecing the city's upper class to taking on said wizards' guild and winning.
Like Alice, I disliked that the book fridges Nazca in such an ignominious fashion to kick off the main plot, although I was somewhat mollified that the villain then proceeded to wipe out the rest of the Clan Barsavi in similarly brutal fashion, meaning she wasn't the One Big Death, she was just the first major casualty (plus, three quarters of Locke's chums, also all male, go down shortly thereafter). Again, though, I recognize not everyone is going to be satisfied with this, nor am I arguing they should be.
For whatever it means, in the third book, Nazca is the only member of the Barsavi family who Jean deems worthy of mentioning among the list of people they've lost when he's reeling it off to Locke.
Speaking of deaths, I was extremely relieved that Jean Tannen survived the Grey King's betrayal: Locke really needed a sidekick for the story to work, and Jean was easily the best of the lot. His friendship with Locke is great, and one of my favorite parts of the book was actually the flashback to when he first joined the crew, after Locke's initial attack of sibling rivalry, where Jean asks Locke to help him steal stuff he can use as a death offering for his deceased parents, and Locke asks Jean to help him learn how to use an abacus*. So cute.
*This after Father Chains uses Jean's superiority with an abacus to humiliate Locke and demonstrate why Jean is a useful addition to the crew.
So that part was good, and I didn't mind the other flashbacks so much, though I might have if I'd read through the book instead of listening to it on audio. What I did mind was Lynch dropping a chapter about the Spider tumbling to Locke's latest scheme and setting a trap for him right after the cliffhanger chapter where he's been thrown into the river in a barrel of horse urine and left for dead. First and most obviously because it's a transparently artificial way to hold off resolving said cliffhanger (unlike the flashbacks, which happen in every chapter); but second and also perniciously, because it sucked so much of the tension out of later scenes with Locke trying to reestablish his Lucas Fehrwight scam—the main source of tension was now “will Locke fall into the Spider's trap, and if so, how will he escape it?” so all the stuff with him stealing an appropriate set of clothes felt like so much wasted time before we got back to the next big story question. And that's also unfortunate because I think the clothing scam was actually one of the strongest parts of the book.
Speaking of which, I see what you mean about Locke being “irritatingly virtuous,” though I didn't mind it much, either. The only part which really got me was the way he immediately opted for saving all the high-bread toffs of Camorr at the risk of missing his chance for revenge against the Grey King. I get that he's supposed to be a noble rogue character, but that part struck me as too altruistic to fit his personality. I would expect him at least to be seriously tempted to leave the aristocrats to their fate while he goes and settles the score with the guy who murdered all but one of his best friends. But no, in his mind, it isn't even a choice, and I don't understand why.
I think it should be noted, though, that Locke also does some really screwed up shit which he's never really called on (a major reason I resist taking the books at all seriously). This is a case in point:
he drops an innocent waiter into the shit, he still takes time extract said waiter *and* give him a purse containing more money he's ever held in his life.
Well, yeah, but he *also* gets the poor sod permanently exiled from the only home he's ever had, presumably cut off from friends, family, everyone and everything he knows. Now, for some people, I suppose this could be the best opportunity of their lives—for others, it would be a kind of hell. For all we know, that waiter might well have committed suicide a couple years later, unable to cope with his life's circumstances.
Other crimes of Master Lamora which go unaddressed: murdering the Grey King's assassin after getting information out of him by shutting him up in a cellar and setting fire to it. True, the man had just killed one of his and Jean's best friends and was complicit the conspiracy to kill them all, but that's an incredibly cruel way to dispatch him.
And biggest of all, he manipulates the Camorri top brass into demolishing the Grey King's escape ship and consigning the ~15 person crew to what I also recall being described as a particularly horrible death. True, they were all the Grey King's lackeys, but they were just there to help him get away with the loot (and not to infect half the city with awful plague, as Locke claims), which hardly seems to make them deserving of such a grisly execution.
I let all this pass because I take the books in a “fun adventure” mindset; if I took them seriously, I'd be forced to conclude that Locke Lamora is a terrible person in ways the books themselves aren't prepared to explore.
A final note on the audiobook version: Michael Page is a great narrator, his voice nicely capturing the story's narrative style, and bringing the characters vividly to life. He also does a wonderful job with the various accents which come into play (mostly as one or another of Locke's characters for a heist), making them very distinct and memorable. Perhaps too memorable, for I'm sure I've caught him recycling a number of secondary voices and accents—he's no Jim Dale—but still an impressive accomplishment which I think utterly nails the tone of the series.
0 notes
trininadz · 7 years
Note
Hello trininadz!!! it's me again. Can you please post margo's angela + fitz fanfiction from today, like you did last time??? thank you in advance
😊😊 no problem anon! ENJOY😉The Sweet State "Patch me through to Webster" was all that could be heard echoing through the Oval office, followed by the slam of the door as a slightly fuming Abby made her exit. Fitz waited for Charlotte to patch him through to his girlfriend--Angela Webster. Angie happened to be the person responsible for giving him his giddy and optimistic outlook on things lately. It's why he displayed such a easy going tone in his earlier meeting with Abby about his foundation and legacy. Fitz was happy and care free more often than not lately and he knew Angela was one of the reasons he felt alive again."Hey 44"...Fitz heard Angela say through the headset as Charlotte connected the call. His girlfriend sounded like she was in a rather chipper mood today. "Hey Ang" Fitz replied into the headset. "You must be off today, you don't have your FBI director voice mode on" said Fitz. Angela smiled glancing into her review mirror as she backed her Mercedes SL 55 out of the driveway."You think you know me so well huh slick," Angie said with a small chuckle. This powerful man was becoming such a focal point in her life and she was loving every part of being Fitzgerald Grants girlfriend. "Get over here..." his deep baritone and slightly whining tone snapped her out of her mini reminiscent love haze. "Lucky for you mister I am indeed off today and was headed to the gym, I'll swing by for a few....I miss you." Fitz could feel a smile spread across his face as he said "see you in a few" and ended the call.Fitz sighed and thought to himself about how he had missed her too. Yes it was only a few days since they went to Teddy's first soccer practice together but he missed his girl. After returning Teddy to Mellie that evening they barely made it to Angela's house... starting to get frisky inside the presidential limo. Their touches and kisses continued into the foyer of her home as soon as they hit the door. They ended their sexual episode on the couch of her lavish home near Palisades Spring Park in DC. Fitz paged Charlotte again letting her know to move his next appointment back an hour or so. He was hoping to maybe have a quick breakfast with Angie before he headed off to his busy day as the leader of the free world. Fitz's second term was winding down and it he had begun to think more and more about his next move and direction in life. He use to think that as soon as his terms were over he'd settle down with Olivia and make babies. However, that was just a boyish fantasy from a man trapped in an unhappy marriage with a hopeful outlook for his country and a man who was head over heels for a woman who was on a constant power chase. So much had changed since he first stepped foot in this Oval Office. "HE" had changed. So had the people around him and he didn't regret any of it. He had grown, taken more responsibility for things, and was now living his life the way he wanted while peacefully co parenting with his ex wife Mellie. Then there was Angela, she was powerful, funny, beautiful, sometimes over bossy, but most of all she was honest. She made him happy, and at this stage in his life he was done with childishness, lies, and unsure feelings. Fitz waited for Angela to arrive while signing off on a few papers confirming the release of Jessa Conrad the bra less muffin aide. No doubt if he told Angela about Jessa she'd give him a stern but confused look with a hint of anger that would cause that dimpling crease to form between her brows. He thought it was so adorable when she displayed some of her bossy director attitude in their relationship. She'd no doubt get a little jealous only to end up teasing him about all of the young tails around D.C. that were lusting over the POTUS.Just then he heard a small knock at the door and yelled "come in!" There she was....Angela's deep brown skin glistened and her loose curls bounced wildly flopping to her shoulders as she entered the Oval. She was dressed in a form fitting pink and black exercise tracksuit. "Hey you!" she said as she entered the oval carrying a basket of fresh fruit and locking the door behind her. Angela sat the basket on the small table near the sofa and strolled over to her boyfriend. They swiftly kissed both smiling into each other's mouth while she ran her hands down his firm pecs. This man was so sculpted--she could feel his hard muscles and abs as she gently slid her hand down his white dress shirt brushing against his silk tie. "I brought a fruit basket over, I stopped at the farmers market on my way. I was in a hurry so I thought I'd grab a quick fruit medley or bushel of grapes when I saw they had fresh peaches and blackberry jam spread that you love." Angie said as Fitz smiled lightly blushing because she had thought of him. She removed her track jacket growing it over his desk chair. She turned around facing him revealing the upper part of her plump brown breast rising like twin peaks from her strapless pink athletic tank top. Suddenly Fitz was no longer hungry for food, but he was hungry for something else instead. She walked over the the table opening near the sofa opening the basket and began eating a few grapes. Angela looked over at Fitz who was shamelessly gawking over her like some horny teenage school boy. "You are insatiable Fitzgerald." She said while rolling her eyes and pulling him from his lusting stare. He laughed deeply at himself and at her accusation, knowing that she knew just what she was doing. This woman had him feeling youthful again and he loved spending time with her.Fitz walked over to her taking her hand that was filled with grapes and moving it to his lips...eating a few pieces and allowing his tongue to slither over her fingers seductively. Angela could feel the pull and electricity start to rise between them. She looked at him with now hooded eyes when he let her abruptly let her hand go and reached passed her brushing her exposed shoulder to grab a peach from the basket. Fitz removed his tie getting more comfortable and sat down on the sofa very nonchalant as if he had not just caused her panties to become the Atlantic Ocean a mere 3 seconds ago. Angela plopped down next to him leaning her back on the arm of the sofa and placing her legs across his lap. This was the usual and routine position they had developed when watching the news together in the evening, enjoying each other's company while reading, or tirelessly doing paper work together on many late nights. Their relationship was blossoming nicely and Angela found herself often wondering what her future with this man would be like...she adored his kids and his passion for life and his country. Although she hadn't admitted it yet, she could see herself having a real future with Fitz. "Thanks for the basket...sweets from my sweet." Fitz said with the cheesiest grin on his face while taking a few bites of the peach tasting the sweet fruit. Angela started to laugh giving him a weak punch to the side and said, "could you get any more corny baby?" He looked amused and gave her the "puppy dog face" as she called it...feigning innocence as they laughed in unison. "what was that for?!...you are sweet--- let me show you how sweet you are..." Fitz said as that all to familiar lusting look returned to his deep blue eyes. Suddenly the atmosphere in the air changed as Fitz leaned toward her taking his left hand and drifting it up her stomach finally resting on her breast. Fitz began to massage her nipple through the fabric of her tank top while staring straight into her eyes. Angela adjusted herself on the couch so that she could lay flat giving him room to adjust himself to fully hover over her. He placed his peach on the desk and lay half across Her body while massaging both breast feeling her nipples start to harden and peak. Fitz bent down kissing her deeply tasting his peach and her fruit mixing together as sweetly as he sucked and licked her tongue in and out of his mouth. While kissing Angela breathlessly muttered that she had locked the door. She started to reach her hands greedily toward his fly rubbing against the shaft of his already rock hard dick through the fabric of his suit pants. Fitz sat them both up helping her to remove her tank and bra. Her breast plopped free toward him like delectable chocolate milk duds. Fitz was salivating! He dropped to his knees as she sat back on the sofa positioning himself between her legs. She tugged his chin upward kissing all over his face and when their lips locked the kiss was needy and sensual. Angie ran her hands through his dark curls as their tongues sloppily danced together. Fitz softly pulled away to slid his tongue slowly over her lips and down her collar bone while he pinched and groped her silky breast. Fitz leaned his head down while still on his knees and suckled her right nipple into his mouth....loving the feel of the hardened bud against his tongue. Angela moaned feeling her pussy starting to soak her panties. She lifted her torso to remove her bottoms fully exposing herself to her hungry boyfriend. The realization that she was on the sofa in the middle of the most powerful office in the land fully exposed excited her. Fitz couldn't believe how hard he'd gotten as he helped her slip free from her remaining clothes. This was so adventurous, free, and hot he thought to himself as he slid open his zipper guiding his cock through the boxer hole and freeing it from being restrained inside his pants. Although the curtains were fully drawn and no one could see inside, their was a slight glimmer of sunlight radiating from outside onto Angela's fully exposed and beautiful brown skin. He wanted to eat her peach all day if he could. Angela was more than ready as she laid back tugging her hard nipples waiting for him to dive in. Fitz ran his hands up her inner thigh feeling a bead of pre cum form on the tip of his hard penis. He leaned in kissing her soft lips while giving his dick a few strokes before lowering his head to suckle the sweet nectar from her lower lips. As soon as Fitzs mouth touch her pussy....Angie melted into the cushion. Fitz could not get enough of her intoxicating juices. He licked and tongue kissed her pussy deftly as she began to writhe and mewl against his mouth. Fitz angled himself in a more comfortable position...lifting one of her legs across his shoulder as he began to really eat her pussy out as if she was the sweetest peach he'd ever tasted. Fitz gently sucked her clit between lips while reaching up to assist her massaging her beautiful tits. Angie felt like her entire body was electric. His big hands pinched and swirled around her breast aggressively while his beautiful mouth and tongue sucked and lapped her slippery cunt. She reached toward his bobbing head tugging his curls as he began to fuck her with his greedy mouth. Angela was convinced that Fitz had to get off on giving oral sex because he was TOO GOOD AT EATING PUSSY AND HE KNEW IT! Hearing her hiss and slightly curse into the air only egged him on. Fitz knew her orgasm was approaching so he sat up fully on his knees opening her legs widely in a V shape exposing her sopping pretty pussy to his face. She released his hair allowing him to sit up briefly to view his meal with electric blue lust in his eyes. Fitz stroked and tugged his thick dick repeatedly as it pointed forward hanging out through his pants zipper. He angled his face sideways licking between her walls as her juices flowed into his mouth. Angie called his name rather louder than she expected as her pussy began to quake. He bobbed his head allowing his tongue to deeply penetrate her pussy and she started to cum and tremble while grasping his curls. Her cream dripped down his chin and he drank her in continuously. Fitz started to ease up slowly to allow her to come down from her orgasm. One last lick for his sweet he thought. Placing the flat of his tongue along her slit giving one last lick. As is her legs weren't already jelly the last lick from his wife tongue almost caused her to black out. He sat up and leaned forward softly kissing her. Angela could feel herself starting to get wet again as she tasted peach and herself on his tongue. They broke their kiss and he slowly stood up.... pre cum dripped from his penis tip onto the edge of the sofa cushion. Angela was still feeling like a live wire when she saw Fitzs veiny pink dick staring straight at her when he stood. "Come here 44." Angela said in a seductive tone. She sat up reaching her long fingers toward him gently rubbing against the head of his penis as he stood between her legs. She swirled the pre cum around his shaft coating it and beginning to stroke his python. Fitz looked down at his naked girlfriend jerking him off and began to grunt and swirl his dick in her skilled hands. Fitz unbuckled his belt allowing his boxers and pants to fall down around his ankles...freeing his entire cock and loaded ball sac. Unbeknownst to Fitz Angie used her free hand to grab some cherries from the basket placing them into her mouth. Before he knew it, her mouth was on him sucking and making a sloshing sound as she gobbled his dick. There was a soft tingling feel against the underside of his penis along with her tongue from the cherries in her mouth. It felt incredible and Fitz knew he wouldn't last long. After all he could still taste her all over him and that alone made him want to blow his load. He looked away allowing himself to enjoy the feel of her warm mouth slurping his dick in and out her mouth while her hands rubbed his heavy balls. Angie abruptly pulled back popping his wet dick from her mouth and causing Fitz to almost buckle over from the amazing feel and suction. She kissed the tip of his cock softly. Angela leaned upward and guided him in between her huge breast. Fitz hadn't had much experience with titty fucking and he felt like he was 25 again exploring new things with her.He grabbed her breast on each side enclosing his dick in between her breast and starting to pump back and forth. His dick was so big it poked out toward her face each time he thrust forward. Angie looked up at Fitz whose eyes were beginning to roll back. She wanted to make him feel as good as he had done for her earlier so she tucked her chin forward and opened her mouth. When she moved forward it allowed his penis head to slightly enter and brush into her mouth each time he pumped forcefully between her tits. Fitz looked down and lost it. His dick was wet and fully erect. It glistened as it slid smoothly between her chocolate boobs. He pumped upward in between her breast a few more times before the warmth around his shaft and slither of her tongue against his dick head made him stiffen, groan, and shoot thick loads of cum onto Angie's chest and chin. Fitz and Angie were both spent and thoroughly exhausted. They both had somewhat shaky legs but Fitz helped her up and they headed to his adjoining bathroom hand in hand to clean up. Before the bathroom door closed, you could hear Fitzs voice echo through the oval saying, "Babe have you ever been to Vermont?" Fitz got to eat his breakfast and Angie got her workout. All was well at 1600 Penn Ave.
2 notes · View notes
Text
It’s the first of December and the Christmas countdown starts NOW!! Christmas is my absolute faaavourite time of the year and when I was younger I would start making my wish list months before the big day. As I’ve gotten older though I’ve found it increasingly difficult to think of things that I’d like to receive and that my friends and family would like to receive too. This year I’ve compiled a list of items that the chic and fashionable woman may want for Christmas including clothes, shoes, accessories, beauty, tech and more. I hope this will help build up a quick picture of what a modern city girl may wish for this Christmas for all those confused boyfriends, husbands and friends!
So here are some gifts for her if you’re stumped this festive season:
Fashionista 
White Stuff Nene Jacket
Gloriously soft and fluffy, this Nene jacket from White Stuff is my fave of the season! It’s incredibly warm and has actually served me much better than my other winter coats so far. It’s thick enough that it’s pretty much completely wind proof and with all that fluff the heat stays inside! I’ve been wearing this one every day since I got it because it’s perfect for pretty much all occasions. You can very easily dress it up or dress it down making it a great gift this winter.
Available from White Stuff for £120
White Stuff Grey Spot My Heart Jumper
There’s something very Christmassy about this jumper despite the lack of Christmas trees or Christmas hats adorned on it. It’s super cute and cosy and a really great, light option to keep you warm this winter. It’s simple enough that most people will love it but with enough details to make your outfit that little bit more interesting. This one is nearly sold out on the website so grab it quick if it’s on your Christmas list!
Available from White Stuff for £55
Dune Olyvea Red Suede Boots
One of my absolute favourite items on this list are these gorgeous red suede boots from Dune. I’ve only had these for a week but already had so many compliments on them. The red colour is perfect for Christmas and the block heel means these actually make for sensible day shoes and are very comfy. These bad boys were actually out of stock for weeks so if you’ve got your eyes on these then snap them up quickly!
Only downside is that they have coloured a few of my socks red so I will be wearing black socks/tights with them from now on!
Available from Dune for £99
Barts Women’s Jasmin Beanie
I find that if you really don’t know what to give for Christmas, you can never go wrong with a good hat, scarf and gloves! This chunky knit grey beanie from Barts is super cosy and even has an extra fleece layer around the inner edge to keep your head extra snug. What’s more this beanie is hand-knitted so each and every one by Barts is slightly different making it that little bit more unique.
Available from Tiso for £27
  Charles Conrad Rose Gold Watch
Minimalist watches are still all the rage right now so this rose gold watch from Charles Conrad makes for the perfect gift that you know will be treasured long after Christmas is over. I love the simple watch face with roman numerals round the edge, which look so elegant. Charles Conrad watches are actually all unisex so the watch face is a bit larger than similar watches out there. Whilst some of their other watches would work well for both sexes, I think the rose gold one is best suited to the ladies!
ALSO, get 30% off full price Charles Conrad watches on Watches2U.com with the code ‘WHATSHOT30’. Valid until 31st December 2017.
Available from watches2u for £169
Rose Gold Pandora Rings
I’ve always been a huge fan of Pandora’s stacking rings and I’ve been eyeing up their new Rose Gold collection ever since it’s release. They have a huge range of rings with some very simple and other more extravagant items. What I love about Pandora’s jewellery is that you can mix and match pretty much all of it and over the years I’ve built up a collection of silver and rose gold jewellery that can be paired with anything. Pandora’s charms and stacking rings make for great Christmas presents if you know that someone’s already a fan of their range because then you can just add to the their collection. I wear four of these Pandora rings daily, with three stacking rings and the radiant elegance ring as the star of the show. The Daisy Band one is really special so I save that for parties and such!
Puzzle Heart Ring £45 // Droplets Ring £55 // Radiant Elegance Ring £55 // Linked Love Ring £45 // Dazzling Daisy Band Ring £75
  Beauty Addict 
Magnitone BareFaced Shimmer Brush
I have always been skeptical about gadgets like this, wondering if it’s just the beauty industry trying to push another expensive product that I don’t really need. However, ever since I first got my hands on this back in 2015, I’ve been a convert to the Magnitone BareFaced Viba-Sonic Brush! The best thing about this brush is that the results are immediate (yes, immediate!) and you’ll have silky smooth skin from day one. For people who think that their skin is good enough without one of these, I can assure you that it is honestly impossible to get as deep a clean from just using an exfoliator or cleanser. This would be the perfect gift for any lady as it’s great for all skin types and can be used on a daily basis. The shimmer brush is limited edition, which makes it just that little bit more special for the festive season. What’s more, it comes with a 12 month warranty so there’s no need to worry about repairs – I’ve had mine for 2 years already and never had a problem with it!
Read my full review of the Magnitone BareFaced Vibra-Sonic Brush here.
Available for £90 from Magnitone
Magnitone Wipeout! Cleansing Cloth
I’ve seen a couple of reviews of these wipes and I honestly just couldn’t believe that they would be able to remove make up without the help of a cleanser. However, I managed to remove a full face of foundation, mascara and eyeliner with just a few rubs from this uber soft cloth. I couldn’t believe my eyes! I was most impressed that it managed to remove all of my mascara, which is usually quite tricky and I have to use an oil-based make-up remover. This cloth works like  m a g i c  and it’s now an essential part of my night-time routine! This is an essential for any girl that wears makeup during the day and she’ll thank you eternally (well, for 1000 uses) for bringing this magic cloth into her life.
This pack contains two cleansing cloths and each one is reusable up to 1000 times. Yes, 1000 times. It’s machine washable, super compact and super useful – great for every day use or for travelling! Using one of these also means less disposable wipes in the landfill so it would make the perfect gift for an eco-friendly gal.
Available from Magnitone for £15
7th Heaven Complete Pamper Pack
7th Heaven face masks have always been my go-to when I’m in need of some pampering. At only £1 per pack, they’re super cheap but soo good! The new complete pamper pack that they’ve released for Christmas would make the perfect gift for someone who’s been a bit stressed lately and needs a bit of time to themselves. This pack is complete with 8 different face masks, an exfoliating and bath & shower pom pom, a headband, a mini towel, glove masques, sock masques and finger masques. If you’re wondering what the hell the last three are, the glove and sock masques are ultra moisturising gloves for dry or rough hands and feet, and the finger masques are for strengthening your nails and cuticles. For just £19.99 this is one of the best beauty bargains out there this Christmas should make any girl very happy on Christmas day. Giving someone an excuse to treat themselves is one of the best things you can do this season!
Available for £19.99 from Argos
Iconic London Make Up Brushes
Now I’ll be honest, when I first got my hands on these babies I had no clue what each brush was supposed to do. It’s been a steep learning curve but I’ve realised that having a specific brush for each part of your face really does help create that ultra-flawless look and it makes me feel like a badass makeup pro. These 12 pearl gold brushes are sure to make any makeup fiend very happy and add a bit of luxe to their beauty collection. The best thing about Iconic London is that all their brushes are 100% cruelty free and vegan!
Here’s what’s included:
Large Powder, Tapered Powder
, Foundation Buffer, Contour Buffer (Perfect for sculpting)
, Angled Powder (to sculpt cheeks)
, Concealer blender (to cover imperfections)
, Flat Fan Brush (perfect for dusting)
, Large Shader (apply shadows
), Medium Angled Shader: Gives a soft application of colour. Great to use on brows or to blend the crease
, Tapered Blending Brush (perfect to apply colour)
, Small Angle Brush (perfectly shape and define brows) & Small Point Brush (use with gel or liquid liners).
Available from Iconic London for £75  (+ 10% student discount online!)
Magnitone BlendUp Brush
A new addition to the Magnitone family is the BlendUP Vibra-Sonic Makeup Blending Brush. As I said above, I’ve been a huge fan of Magnitone since 2015 so I was pretty excited to see their new product for applying foundation. There are three different modes: blend, airbrush and clean, and you can use these for light, medium or full coverage. What’s really cool is that you can even use this brush to add the finishing touches such as bronzer, highlighter and blusher! I’m sure this will quickly become a must-have for beauty addicts who’ll accept nothing less than flawless coverage. My only problem with this product is that it takes longer to apply because you’ve got to wait for the vibrations to absorb smoothly into your skin but the result really is so much better than your average make up brush. There is literally zero evidence that you even applied any product to your face!
Available for £70 from Magnitone
Blink Brow Bar Super Natural Brow Gift Set
Did you know that brow exfoliator existed? I certainly didn’t until I opened up this small package of brow essentials. I even created a poll on Twitter and Instagram and it turns out most other people don’t know these exist either! Strong brows are all the rage right now and I don’t know many girls who haven’t been sucked into this trend. This super natural brow gift set is for those that aren’t messing around when it comes to their brow game. Including brow exfoliator, brow day cream and a brow pencil, this will take your brow game to the next level!
Available from Blink Brow Bar for £35
Bobbi Brown Bronze Shimmer Compact
Bobbi Brown’s Shimmer Compact is a favourite amongst beauty lovers. This little compact works as a highlighter, bronzer and eyeshadow making it an essential for all outings. The versatility of this means this is suitable for pretty much any makeup fiend so throw a little bit of glitter their way this Christmas!
Available from Debenhams for £30.15 (RRP £35.50) 
Cook Extraordinaire
Cookshop Waffle Maker
Waffle makers are one of those things that everybody wants but no one feels like they can justify buying, which is exactly why they make the perfect Christmas presents!! Everybody loves a good Belgian chocolate waffle at the Christmas market but nobody wants to pay the $$$ price tag that comes with them. Problem solved with this uber cheap waffle maker so you can make them in the comfort of your own (warm) home!
Available from Debenhams for £21 here (RRP £35)
Kilner Spiralizer
A spiralizer is one of those trendy gadgets that insta-foodies love to have in their kitchen. I picked this Kilner one up at random but it is actually so, so good and I was amazed by how quick and easy it is to use. For £15 I thought this was an absolute steal as the vegetable lands right inside the jar creating zero mess and you create your salad to go quickly and easily. The blades at the top are engineered so that your vegetable of choice is firmly stuck vertically on top of the jar and you just need to twist it round to create those beautiful vegetables swirls.
Available from Debenhams for £15 here 
Breville Blend-Active Blender
When I went through my fitness crazy phase in my second year of uni, I quickly nabbed one of these Breville Blend-Active Blenders to mix up some tasty protein shakes and smoothies. Three years later, this is still one of the top blenders on the market and I’d say that you definitely get the most value for cost to quality. I love this blender because it blends directly into a bottle, ready for you to take away with you. This blender has so many uses and my mum and I now share it with me using it to make protein shakes and her using it to make soup!
Now available in green, blue and pink with different container sizes.
Available from Debenhams for £20 (RRP £30)
Shop more of Debenhams Christmas range here.
Biscuiteers Nutcracker Biscuit Tin
I have been a huge fan of the Biscuiteers ever since I did work experience with Penguin Random House (read more about that here) and they had a custom box of Willy Wonka inspired biscuits made up. Whoever said food isn’t art clearly hasn’t seen these beautiful biscuits because they are stunning! Almost too stunning to eat. These Nutcracker biscuits make for the perfect Christmas gift and your recipient can always keep the tin to remind them of these exquisite biscuits!
Available from Biscuiteers for £35
  Home Goodies 
HEMA Instax Accessories
In this digital age it’s nice to see that polaroid cameras have made a solid comeback. I love taking polaroid photos to mark special moments but, the problem is, I’m always losing these little prints since I’m reluctant to risk damaging them by pinning them up. I’m so glad I’ve now got my hands on the Instax accessories range from HEMA so I’ve can put my fave prints in a little album and safely store the rest of them in this handy polaroid sized box. This bundle would make the perfect gift for anyone who already owns an Instax mini, or, if you know someone who’s keen to get one, you can purchase one of those too at HEMA for £70.
Instax mini 8 camera bag £12.50  | Instax photo album £5 | Instax storage container £2 | colour film Instax mini Glossy (2×10/pk) £15 
Unicorn Slippers
Unicorns are all the rage right now and I can’t think of a better gift for someone who likes to hibernate at home during the winter months. These amazing slippers will make each step feel magical and add a bit of fun to your home. Plus, the super thick unicorn face at the front means your toes will never go cold!!
Available from Find Me a Gift for £14.99
Leather Goals Journal
Every #girlboss needs a goals journal to get sh*t done, or as it says on the cover “achieve your dream life”. This plain leather journal feels suitably luxe for your biggest, wildest dreams. Over the past few months I’ve become obsessed with writing to-do lists for my day/month/year/LIFE. What’s more, this journal is filled with that thick cut paper that’s really satisfying to write on. Help your gal pal achieve her goals this coming year with a swanky new leather journal.
Available from Find Me a Gift for £36.99
*This post contains some PR samples. All opinions are my own. 
Stay up to date with What’s Hot?
Bloglovin’ / Instagram / Facebook / Twitter / Pinterest
[jetpack_subscription_form] // <![CDATA[ (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); // ]]>
Christmas Gifts For Her: Fashion, Beauty, Kitchen & Home It's the first of December and the Christmas countdown starts NOW!! Christmas is my absolute faaavourite time of the year and when I was younger I would start making my wish list months before the big day.
0 notes
Text
Serial Killer Easter Egg Found In Deadlight
EA Sports UFC complications are a thing you would not really want to examine, especially soon after paying for a game that has faults within. Kita semua mungkin sudah mengetahuinya bahwa Web Download Manager merupakan aplikasi / computer software yang sangat berguna dalam hal download men-download, karena aplikasi ini mampu mempercepat download sebuah file hingga lima kali lebih cepat seperti file rar, zip, film, dokumen, dll. With 5 new game modes and improvements to recent attributes, EA SPORTS UFC two delivers an authentic atmosphere for the two gamers and UFC supporters alike. EA SPORTS has also taken crucial actions to carry the ground game to an fascinating new degree with its new dynamic grappling method, which permits for simultaneous two-fighter interaction. Download the UFC two android and knowledge 5 hrs of the full game featuring all-new game modes like Knockout Mode, UFC Greatest Group and Live Events now featuring the UFC 202 fight card. Pastikan anda mengetahui bahwa meroot ponsel Android akan menghapus garansi ponsel. On the box you will require to publish 'œEA Sports UFC 2' and as soon as it finds it, decide on it and pick out 'œGET it FREE'. EA Sports' line of different titles have constantly been recognized to arrive with a Typical and Deluxe edition. EA SPORTS UFC comes with Reside Occasions to allow you perform with some of real world performances happening in UFC. EA Canada has taken note of this request, which is why you now have the choice to become the UFC's Ultimate Fighter and a Hall of Famer as both a male or female. Compete in on the web or offline competitions to progress your fighters and earn coins that open packs which provide particular things utilised to sculpt your crew into the most explosive in the UFC. GREEN FARM three APK MOD ANDROID - is the most common casual game offered by Gameloft obtainable for all Android devices. Nonetheless, I recognize a fantastic simulator when I see one particular and EA Sports UFC 2 checks most of the boxes. Earn amazing rewards with every pulse-pounding match, and face off towards UFC icons in decisive Title Fights. We are coding and we host Keygen Generators for virtually every single game in the globe. Dari sobat semua mungkin sudah tahu bahwa Internet Download Manager merupakan aplikasi / software yang sangat berguna dalam hal download guys-download, karena aplikasi ini mampu mempercepat download sebuah file hingga lima kali lebih cepat seperti file rar, zip, movie, dokumen, dll. EA Sports UFC hack and cheats isn't going to have to have to download any software package, basically use the generator online and right receive the hack added benefits. Doodle Army 2 Mini Militia aka DA2, primarily based on the original stickman shooter Doodle Army, was developed based on player suggestions and recommendations. It's time and power to download EA SPORTS UFC 2 complete game So if you like to perform EA SPORTS UFC 2 for android, it isn't a issue. A cada ano, a possível entrada de uma liga feminina é cogitada, e é grande número de usuárias de redes sociais que comentam a respeito da série FIFA, brand não seria algo totalmente inesperado que a EA Sports leve a ideia em consideração. The diversion is not without having the Greatest Staff collectible card mode known from distinctive preparations of EA Sports. Fortunately, when EA Sports UFC had severe glitches, its sequel is a lot additional polished up, but that isn't going to suggest it comes problem-totally free. Wherever the very first EA Sports UFC failed to go huge on information, EA Sports UFC 2 delivers large time. It really is time to download EA SPORTS UFC 2 full game So if you like to play EA SPORTS UFC 2 for android, it is not a difficulty. Now no want of wandering on world-wide-web for fake cd keys as the EA sports activities UFC keygen + crack tool will make your game free of charge for an limitless time span. The trigger UFC 2 can be some thing that, within my hands at the least, appears like a real fight rather of series of spammed inputs from my panicky hands. Contemplate the bar for MMA games officially raised, as EA Sports UFC 2 improves on just about each facet of the original, whilst also introducing an intuitive new grappling program and sensible knockout engine. But it would seem unfair to examine the to start with iteration (except if you count EA MMA) of a game with the 3rd iteration of THQ's game (Undisputed). Collect your favored UFC fighters, throw down in competitive combat, and earn in-game rewards by enjoying dwell occasions tied to the true globe of the UFC. Download Internet Velocity Meter Pro Apk v1.4.eight full edition most up-to-date from my blog site here..!! Build your workforce of up to give fighters in distinct fat courses utilizing UFC 2's deep customization choices. The action keeps coming in reside events that coincide with the serious planet of the UFC. The proxies are transformed every day and staying up to date since they grow to be unavailable, your EA Sports UFC Hack will not start off with no a doing work proxy, unless of course you need to have it to, but I do not think you want that for the reason that you could possibly get in difficulty, so stay safe and sound and make use of your proxies! CD Projekt Red's GOG service saw its revenue rise to 23.54 million PLN ($5.85 million) compared to 20.96 million PLN ($5.2 million) for the duration of the very same time period last yr. EA Sports UFC 2 key lets players to leap appropriate into a quick unranked on-line match or partake in the ranked championships. For instance, with UFC 200 taking place (in authentic daily life) on 9 July, all wins and losses count towards a leaderboard from which the best players will enter into a Grand Tournament Final. EA says that the UFC title is the seventh addition to The Vault for binge perform on Xbox 1. E mais, viva todos os melhores momentos do futebol do mundo genuine com EA SPORTS Football Club Match Day. I would share pics and video clips, but EA Sports specifically barred all reviewers from employing captured screenshots and movies (that is why we all have the very same images in our stories). They claimed the UFC forced Mark Cuban to shut down HDNet Fights, but that was much more a organization selection with them feeling it was extra value-effecitve to pay charges to broadcast displays other promoters did, and they have aired events often for many years, to start with on HDNet, and to this day just after the identify adjust to AXS Tv. Climb as a result of the ranks of the UFC and beat down the competition by way of 4 weight classes.
0 notes
dndeed · 5 years
Text
Critical Role Miniature Rollout: C2E79
With Andrew Harshman
An archive and review of the minis used on Critical Role.
Tumblr media
The chase continues. As disappointing as such events can be, it is a required part of RPG play and narrative in general. You cannot have those highs without the occasional low. The Mighty Nein’s victory will be all the much sweeter when it comes. I mean, they are going to win, right?
Welcome to the jungle, etc, etc, it’s time for Critical Role Miniature Rollout Campaign 2 Episode 79!
The List
Mats by Mars: Swamplands v1.0
Mats by Mars: Shattered Soil
Unknown Mats By Mars Map Covered in Textured Material
Real Game FX Fog Monster Fog Machine
LITKO Flying Figure Stands
Axe N Shield Single Flyer Risers - Clear Mithril
Tiny Terrain: Large Tree
Tiny Terrain: Small Tree
Hirst Arts Fieldstone Ruins
Dwarven Forge Mountain Peak Pack
Printable Terrain Gloomwood Trees painted by @Minileed and sourced by Hyperion Terrain
SteamForged Games Logs and Stumps
Steamforged Games Critical Role Miniatures
Steamforged Games Pupper
HeroForge Jester Duplicity Miniature
Monster Menagerie #021 Bryn Lightfingers (Invisible)
Rage of Demons #051 Human Wizard (Invisible)
Reaper Minis Mountain Troll Heavily Modified
Waterdeep Dragon Heist #017 Cambion Devil
Reaper Minis Shadow Hound
D&D Icons of the Realms Miniatures: Monster Menagerie - Treant Premium Figure
Leafless Model Train Style Trees
Hobby Shop Trees and Bushes
Possible Model Train Boulders 
The Terrain
Tumblr media
The Lotusden Mats by Mars: Swamplands v1.0
All the components in this layout have been used in previous battles, with the exception of the mat. Mats by Mars Swamplands v1.0 is quite nice. The art has a very tactile nature to it. The swampy art really jumps off the mat and is very visible even at a distance. If your party’s quest progression gets bogged down, there’s no better map to get swamped on.
The Nonhuman Animals
Tumblr media
Frumpkin Steamforged Games Pupper
When being deployed to the field, Frumpkin apparently suffered a miniature mishap. So Matt used the quote: “puppers” mini to represent Caleb’s familiar. Sadly no angles captured this figure very completely. Pending confirmation, this appears to be a good puppers.
The Monsters
Tumblr media
Guardian of the Lotusden D&D Icons of the Realms Miniatures: Monster Menagerie - Treant Premium Figure
This is the only official Dungeons and Dragons miniature with flocking on it. A moss effect along the treant’s feet and arms. A completely bizarre production decision. This tree’s treebeard beard looks great, why not just use a similar effect to communicate the moss? No reason this model couldn’t be all plastic. 
My personal feelings about flocking aside, I like this miniature. The texture communicated in the sculpt is very woody, very detailed, very treant-like. The facial expression is highly animated, which is not terribly common in Monster Manual miniatures. A quick side note, this figure for some reason includes a rock, which can be placed in the figure’s lower left hand. But why? Again, there are a lot of production questions here.  
Closing Thoughts
I was totally wrong about the exit of Obann’s miniature figure. It’s a nice mini, glad it’s back. Less glad about the villain resurrection.
#criticalroleminiaturerollout
9 notes · View notes
dndeed · 6 years
Text
Critical Role Miniature Rollout: C2E29
With Andrew Harshman
A summary and review of the minis used on Critical Role.
Tumblr media
A quick disclaimer up top, in much the same way fighting an invisible opponent can be difficult, identifying minis with the live show mini cam quality was pretty tricky. Please forgive any lapses in accuracy and completeness.
Grab something to drink and prepare a dish best served cold, it’s time for Critical Role Miniature Rollout Campaign 2 Episode 29! 
The Characters
Tumblr media
The Mighty Nein and Shakäste Steamforged Games Critical Role Miniatures Photo by @RogueReader47
Originally Frumpkin was just part of Caleb’s model base. Fortunately, he has been given his own mini. This cat’s a full fledged party member. He’s gotta have his own mini and it sure looks good. Very natural, very cat like.
Shakäste is looking super suave. As with the other figures, this is such a well executed rendition of the official art. The miniature looks exactly like the art by @ornerine. Now that I’m seeing this character as a fully painted figure, I gotta wonder about Shakäste’s morning routine. With this many belts, it has to be a minimum three hour process. Which just makes Shakäste that much cooler.
Kidnapped Party Member Legendary Realms Mummy 
Seen in the left prison chamber, this is a clever usage of the Legendary Realms mummy mini. It has a pretty distinct appearance and works well in this capacity. It looks somewhat familiar, not unlike Shakäste outfit in fact.
The Villains
Tumblr media
Lorenzo Steamforged Games Photo from Matthew Mercer’s Twitter
Everyone take notes, this is the proper way to do a boss battle. Kidnap half the party, murderlize a beloved character, then get a professional miniature studio to custom sculpt a figure. What a miniature! 
When word starting getting around the internets that Lorenzo was potentially a shapshifted oni, I got to worrying. Not about the longevity of the party, but about the potential oni mini choices. There are some solid prepaints in the D&D Miniatures Game back catalog, but those are well out of production. The two currently available onis are frankly terribly in comparison. 
How silly of me to worry. Of course Matthew Mercer and Steamforged Games did it right. A phenomenal figure for a monumentous session and story point. Talk about table presence, even zoomed out on a live feed, this mini looked amazing. DMs, let’s learn from this excellent example of a villain confrontation.
The List
Campaign Coins DEVEN RUE COMPASS ROSE
Dwarven Forge Dungeons
Dwarven Forge Dungeon of Doom
Legendary Realms Double Bed
Tiny Furniture Medieval Bath Furniture
Dungeon of Doom LED Torch Wall
Deadly Foes Dressing: Candelabra
Dwarven Forge Dungeon of Doom Vaulted Doorway
Dungeon of Doom Vaulted Narrow Door
Legendary Realms Wooden Chest
Legendary Realms Beds
Dwarven Forge Medieval Furniture Set
Dwarven Forge Dungeon of Doom Vaulted Open Arch Wall
Dwarven Forge Dungeon of Doom Bars Insert
Dwarven Forge Dungeon of Doom, 4x4 Dungeon Floor
Dungeon Floor Pack A
Dungeon of Doom Passage Wall
Legendary Realms Hirst Arts Open Barrel
Legendary Realms Wooden Large Open Crate
Short Rubble Pile
Deadly Foes Dressing: Cage
Legendary Realms Hirst Arts Wooden Large Open Crate
Crown of Fangs Dressing: Rectangular Table
Deadly Foes Dressing: Candelabra
Dwarven Forge Dungeon of Doom Weapon Rack
Dwarven Forge Castle Builder Stone Stairs
Dwarven Forge Dungeons Door Pack
Icons of the Realms Adventurer’s Camp Weapon Rack
Dwarven Forge Dungeon of Doom Vaulted Door Corner
Dwarven Forge  LED Lighted Brazier
Axe N Shield Single Flyer Risers - Clear Mithril
Real Game FX Fog Monster Remote Controlled LED Terrain
Legendary Realms Mummy 
Rusty Dragon Inn Dressing: Table
Desert of Desolation #32 Rot Scarab Swarm
Lost Coast #008 Lamashtu Thug 1
Lost Coast #013 Lamashtu Thug 2
Lightfoot Halfling Rogue Epic Level Starter Set
Deathknell #25 Voice of Battle
Rusty Dragon Inn Dressing: Crate
Steamforged Games Critical Role Miniatures
Steamforged Games Oni
Unknown Green Spiritual Weapon Marker
The Terrain
Tumblr media
Sour Nest Dungeon Furnaces Real Game FX Fog Monster Remote Controlled LED Terrain
What I thought initially was a piece from the Dwarven Forge Sewers set turned out to be a lighting item by company Real Game FX. They do some excellent work, I’ve played at a table that used one of their tabletop fog machines. This component is really cool, but it did not get to shine due to the live lighting conditions. I’m sure the next time we see these they will have their LEDs active.
Not a whole lot of new terrain, say for the Dwarven Forge  LED Lighted Brazier and Dwarven Forge Dungeon of Doom Bars Insert which were both used to wonderful effect. A good amount of furniture again in this episode and I got my wish from last blog post:
We have seen a lot of tables on Campaign 2, I am eagerly awaiting the moment when one of them gets flipped dramatically to provide cover. 
Prato, my man!
The Spells
Tumblr media
Party Spells Desert of Desolation #32 Rot Scarab Swarm and Unknown Green Spiritual Weapon Marker 
It is a little tough to see, Rot Scarab Swarm is the figure in the left section of the dungeon, near the green spiritual weapon I’ve been unable to identify. A convenient miniature and it’s perfectly employed here. This mini has a glossy paint finish that really pops and is most appropriate for an exotic beetle. 
The Villains
Tumblr media
Iron Shepherd Lackeys Lost Coast #008 Lamashtu Thug 1 and Lost Coast #013 Lamashtu Thug 2 
Generally I stick to reviewing/discussing only the miniatures that have not been seen previously in Campaign 2. But I have a crackpot prediction to share. I conspiracy theory based on minis, a Conspiramini Theory if you will. 
The Mighty Nein pursue three members of the Iron Shepherds through the first level of the basement dungeon, Prato, Rusa, and a hireling dressing in the signature black and red Iron Shepherd attire. The mini is the dual dagger wielding Pathfinder Battles Lost Coast #013 Lamashtu Thug 2 figure. But in the following scene down in the second level of the Sour Nest basement, the hireling is replaced with Lost Coast #008 Lamashtu Thug 1 a similar character with a crossbow.
I posit that this is not a mini swap to portray the change in equipment, nor a simple oversight, but in fact a deliberate choice indicating that a member of the Iron Shepherds has survived! Hopefully this will pan out better than my other conspiramini theories.
Closing Remarks
Is it Thursday yet? Yes it is. Very excited for the new episode tonight. 
#criticalroleminiaturerollout
14 notes · View notes