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demivampirew · 3 years

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Say no to this.

Henry x Reader (wife) x Reader (the other woman)

Triggers: Angst; cheating, breakup, divorce (and crying).

A/N: This was inspired by two songs from the musical Hamilton: Say No to This and Burn, and it’s told from the perspective of the characters (Henry, Reader (Wife), Reader (the other woman)

You can find more of my writings in the Masterlist

Having the chance to portray one of his favourite characters is an honour for which Henry will forever be thankful. Yet, he must admit that having to spend time apart from his family was not an easy task.

He sat on the bed in the dark hotel room, only enlightened by the moonlight. On his phone screen, he saw the picture you’ve sent him earlier that day of you and your daughter playing, you dressed as a princess and the six-year-old as a dragon. “Oh, your mighty witcher, come and save me, please,” read the message under the picture. Henry missed dressing up in costumes and running around the house with his little angel, who would laugh uncontrollably every time he caught and started to tickle her.

It’s been over two months since he left for work; 60 plus days without feeling the lovely touch of your hands on his face, too much time without feeling the warmness of your body against his.

He laid on the bed, staring at the ceiling for an hour, unable to sleep when his phone announced that he had a new message.

“Are you awake? I can’t sleep,” y/n wrote. She was a friend he made on the set of the show - she worked as a personal assistant for one of the recurrent directors of the show and she was staying at the same hotel that Henry. “Yes. Can’t sleep either. Come if you want,” he replied, thinking that some company would help him to feel less lonely.

Fifteen minutes later there was a knock on the door. Henry opened the door and invited y/n to come in. Once inside, she faced him and smiled as she showed him the content of her bag: a PS and The Witcher 3 game. “I know you’re more into pc, but l don’t have a gaming pc here, so we will have to play with this, okay,” she said grinning.

“I remember you saying that you were good at this,” y/n while rolling her eyes, teasing him. “I am, but in the pc,” Henry defended himself with a playful smile.

They played the game for two hours before she suggested that it might be time for her to leave. Henry tried to disconnect the console from the tv but she told him to keep it, for now, so he could keep practising.

“Well, good night. I hope you can have a good sleep and tomorrow enjoy your free day,” y/n told him. “Same for you,” he said goodbye, but neither of them moved. They stared at each other for a long minute in silence. Henry’s hands reached for her face bringing it closer to his, culminating in a passionate kiss, while her arms embraced him.

Her naked body, covered only by the bed-sheets rested on the mattress as she slept. Henry looked at her for a moment and then walked towards the bathroom. He washed his face on the sink and then stared at the mirror, finding it hard to recognize the person that was reflected in the mirror. “I promise you that I will be forever faithful to you, my love” he once promised you, his lovely wife, and now the words echoed inside his mind, as stabs on his heart.

How could had he broken the promise he made you? Did he not loved you any more? No, that was sure of that, he loved you more than he had ever done. You no only made him happy and supported him through tough times, but you also gave him the thing that he treasured the most in the world: his daughter. But, he had to be honest with himself, for the first time in a long time and admit that things were not as they used to be. Before the birth of the little girl, you used to be inseparable. You would go with him everywhere in the world, game and laugh and made love every second you could. Now, you were parents; your lives centred on the precious angel and work and were often too tired and since the kid would like to sleep with you, often lacked intimacy.

The worst part of all: he wished that he could say that it was a one time mistake, but it became an affair that lasted for months.

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You hated yourself. In the past, you’d constantly criticized “the other woman” for being malicious women who stole men from others. Now you had become one of them. Well, no completely. Sure, you were carrying an affair with a married man, but you weren’t a fool, you knew that you would never be able to “stole” anyone and he would never leave his wife for you; he never made such a promise and you knew him well enough to know that he loved his family more than anything in the world and he was being vulnerable due to the distance between his true woman and him. Were you a bad woman for being with a taken man knowing that he was in such a delicate emotional position? Maybe, but to be completely honest, so were you. Months before you met Henry, your fiancé cancelled the wedding because he had fallen in love with somebody else. You were feeling lonely and undesired and you had developed a crush on him before that first night. So, you didn’t find the strength to fight the desire and succumb to the temptation.

Every night you’ve spent together, with his strong arms embracing you as his lips caressed your body, felt amazing no matter how wrong it was. And, even if your heart ripped every time you remembered that he wasn’t truly yours - and you were reminded of that constantly, since there was no a single time in which he hadn’t unconsciously said his wife’s name as he reached climax, you couldn’t find it in you to put it a stop.

You knew that this would have a bad end. No matter the outcome, someone would get hurt.

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That day, your sister offered to take care of your six-year-old so you could have some time to yourself to process things.

Desperate to get some distance and to be alone, you rented a small cabin outside the city.

The sun was coming down when you lifted a bonfire outside the place and sat in front of it with a box that you’ve carried there moments before.

Your fingers caressed every picture - of your first date, your first anniversary as girlfriend and boyfriend; vacations, birthdays and even your wedding. Every photo would get wet with your tears before you threw them into the fire. All objects that reminded of the love you once shared, ended up becoming ashes. Letters, poems, teddy bears, roses that you dried; everything. The only surviving things were the pictures you shared with your daughter, but you would make sure to send them to his mother because you didn’t want to see them any more, the pain was too great.

Finally, you took from your pocket the pictures you printed before to look at them for one last time. They were screenshots from a celebrity news website and the headline read “The Witcher star Henry Cavill is seen kissing a mystery woman”, followed by paparazzi photos of him with someone on the balcony of his hotel room. Angrily, you crashed the prints and let them burn into they became nothing.

With nothing more to do, you watched the flames, as you let your tears fall, feeling completely and utterly broken.

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The production was over. After the news crashed, Henry had to continue filming, pretending that nothing happened, while some people looked at him as if he was a monster. Could he blame them for that?

When the article about his affair was published, his brother Charlie was the one who delivered the bad news - his stepdaughter had seen it and told him about it.

He didn’t know what to do. He called his wife over and over, but she never answered. All-day long he tried to communicate with his love, but every time without luck.

Y/N tried to call him, too, but this time he was the one who ignored the call. He had nothing against her. Henry knew that she could no be blamed for his mistake, but he couldn’t talk to her right now. His wife was his priority.

Unfortunately, the only response he got from her was from her sister, two days later, letting him know that she was going to file for a divorce and she never wanted to see him or talk to him again. That she would only allow him to contact her, through her or another family member and elusively for things related to their daughter. She was going to share custody with him, but he would have to pick up and leave the girl on her sister or parent’s house.

Now, months later, he driving to his sister-in-law’s house to pick up his daughter and to leave the divorce papers that he had to sing.

There were no words to explain how much it hurt him to lose the woman he loved deeply. The only consolation was that his family continued to show him love and support as they always did. And, his daughter, unaware of the reason why her mommy and daddy decided to go separate ways, still love him enormously and would fill him with joy every minute of every day that he had her.

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It was obvious that there was no going to be a good end to the affair - it never does. You knew someone would get hurt, but you’d never imagined that it would be all three of you.

Terrible didn’t even begin to explain how bad you felt. Of all the three of you, you were the one who got it the “best”, since luckily the pictures only showed your hair in a bun and your back, so only a few close people knew that it was you and they were polite enough to keep the secret to avoid you getting harassed. Although, just in case, you dried your hair and got a new haircut.

Henry’s wife filed for the divorce after she found out about the affair. He let you know via text when he put an end to things and told you he could no longer see you. Even if there was no chance to get back with her, he couldn’t be with you because he loved her too much and you reminded him of the mistake he made. As he suggested, you continued working for a few more weeks there to avoid people finding out that it was you, but later quit.

That was by far the worst mistake that you’ve ever made. So much people got hurt; a girl now has two parents that can’t be in the same room, two people who loved each other who can’t be together because the ghost of you would always be present to remind them of the mistake and a person who’s affection was never truly corresponded and caused the break of a family.

Therapy has been truly beneficial in helping you heal and leaving the past in the past.

Today a new article about Henry was posted online. It consisted of pictures of him and his cute girl buying a Christmas tree and he was laughing at his daughter's funny faces.

#henry cavill #henry cavill fanfic #henry cavill fanfiction #henry cavill one shot #henry cavill x reader #henry cavill angst #demivampirew

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abraxos-is-toothless · 3 years

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The Beauty That Is She

Part 3 is finally here!! Previous Updates Here:)

Before we get into this one, I want to say a quick thank you to those of you who have asked if I was alright and have been so, so patient for this update. I'm so sorry it's been so long, but this story was only meant to be a few chapters long and now, my ideas keep changing and there is so much I want to write for it. I can't thank you all enough for the kind words and the encouragement, I honestly didn't think people would enjoy this that much considering it's not one of the mains AND that I've paired him with an OC.

This one isn't my favourite but it is still important or you might get a little confused later on. The wedding/wedding night is in the editing process and I'm still deciding if it should be two small chapters or one big one!

Anyway, enough of my rambling and on with the show!

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It was the day before the wedding and Fenrys was terrified. Not because he didn't want this or he was having second thoughts, but because he was terrified Eva would say she didn't want this anymore, didn’t want him. But above all of that, he was terrified of the words about to come out of the trembling messenger boy’s mouth.

Rowan’s personal messenger, who had managed to secure his place when Rowan had found him trying to survive on the streets. His name, Fenrys remembered, was Kallias. He was just a year younger than Connall and abandoned by his family when he was spotted kissing one of the boys from the village. The family had up and moved not long after, the villagers saying they were too disgraced. Fenrys thought it was all fucking absurd. Your child was your child, regardless of who they chose to love and he would make sure his future children knew that too. The thought of those children, his and Eva’s, brought Fenrys back to Kallias.

“What is it, Kal?” The boy shifted on his feet and Fenrys heard the way he took several deep breaths before he spoke.

“The King wishes to see you out in the courtyard, My Lord.” He rolled his eyes at the title, trying to act as if those words weren’t scaring the fuck out of him.

“How many times have I told you not to call me that? It’s just Fenrys, kid.” Kallias nodded, but he still heard the muttered ‘yes, my lord’ before he turned to leave. Fenrys couldn’t help the way he tried to straighten his tunic and his hair before making his way to see Rowan. It’s not as if looking a bit cleaner would save him from the other male’s protectiveness. He understood though, because he would be the exact same way if his daughter was about to be married off. It would mean she was no longer his to protect, no longer his to care for. Although he would still do those things, every day, until his dying breath.

The halls of the castle were full of people bustling about, adding the last few touches of decorations here and there. Aelin could be heard before you even saw her, making sure everything was perfect. His Queen would like to think everything was done by her, but it was his Eva who led all of the wedding preparations. Fenrys was enraptured whilst watching Eva tell her mother exactly what she wanted, where it would all go and when it would happen. Aelin had tried to get her way only once, but Rowan had just given her a look, along with a light smile and she had kept silent and continued to make sure Eva wouldn’t have to worry about anything. He breathed deeply as he pushed through a large oak door and stepped out into the courtyard. Out of all of the places he’d seen, the places he’d lived, nowhere had ever felt like home as much as Terrasen did. Not even all of those years spent in Doranelle serving Maeve. Rowan wasn’t hard to find, all he had to do was follow the loud cursing and shouts of “You can get off of me now, Buzzard!”

When he reached them, he bit his lip trying not to laugh; lest he want to go a couple rounds with his Queen for making fun of her. Rowan had Aelin pinned to the ground, straddling her hips and a hand on each of her wrists, her blade knocked a few feet away. When Aelin noticed him, she twisted her head to look at him upside down, eyes narrowed. “What in the hell are you doing out here?” Rowan stood slowly, pulling his wife up beside him, placing a quick kiss to her temple.

“I sent for him,” he said, before Fenrys could even open his mouth. Aelin folded her arms across her chest and raised a brow.

“What could you possibly need him for? His wedding is tomorrow, he still has things to do.” He didn’t really have things to do, just to help set up tables outside for the festivities after the ceremony, but he thought his Queen might be trying to save his ass from Rowan’s ‘territorial fae bullshit’. Fenrys was grateful for the effort, though he doubted even she could save him.

“There’s something I want to show him. We’ll be back in time for when Lorcan and Elide get here, I promise.” Aelin stared at her husband for a few moments longer, having one of those silent conversations before she nodded, kissing Fenrys on the cheek before walking back to the castle, muttering about seeing if Connall wanted to read their newest book. Rowan looked to him when she was out of sight, an unreadable expression on his face before he said, “come and walk with me.” Not a question, nor a request, so he followed obediently as the silver haired man made his way to the tree line. They didn’t speak as they walked, the only sounds were of rabbits and birds that he wouldn’t know were there without his fae hearing, and the crunch of shrubbery underfoot. Studying the warrior a few paces in front of him, he noticed the male hadn’t actually brought any of his weapons with him. It made him feel better, knowing he wasn’t likely to get stabbed, but that didn’t mean Rowan couldn’t hurt him. There was no need for weapons considering how much power he had.

After what felt like hours in the silence, was merely a thirty minute walk to the hills within the grounds, but far behind the castle where Rowan halted them. “Where are we?” His King, his brother in arms, his friend looked at him with such softness in those stark green eyes; Fenrys couldn’t even find the will to look away.

“We’ll get to that, but first I have to say a few things.” He dipped his head for Rowan to go on. “When Aelin first told me she was carrying twins, I cried for hours. It was from overwhelming joy and excitement, but also from an underlying fear. Fae twins are rare, as you know, but childbirth for fae females is also a difficulty. I was so, so terrified something would go wrong, that I’d lose them, including Aelin and that it would be like Lyria all over again.” Fenrys pushed the thoughts from his mind, trying not to remember how cold and angry Rowan had once been. He knew that it would have been a lot worse this time, had the worst actually occurred. “But everything was fine. I watched as they grew, as they kicked their tiny little feet against my touch for the first time. And then suddenly, as if I had merely blinked, I was holding Evalin in my arms.” Images of the warm summer evening the twins were welcomed into the world bombarded him, and he could clearly see Rowan with a babe in each arm in his mind’s eye. It was a sight you simply couldn’t forget. “She may be grown up Fenrys, but she’s my little girl, as she always will be. But tomorrow, tomorrow she becomes yours to love, to cherish and protect and I’ll respect that of course I will, but she’ll never stop being my sweet little princess who used to whack me with wooden swords and put flowers in my hair.” There was a dampness to his cheeks and he realised with a start, as he brought his hand to his face, that he’d started crying somewhere along the way.

“Of course she’s yours Rowan. That will never change, but just so you know, I’ll spend every day of my life trying to be worthy of her, to be worthy of being loved by her.” It was true, he didn’t deserve someone such as Eva, but he’d do everything in his power to prove himself to her. Rowan brought him into a back-clapping hug and he could do nothing but return it.

“I know boyo, I know, I’m just feeling a bit emotional is all and Aelin probably would have told me I was being ridiculous. Also,” he pulled away and smiled wickedly, “even if you do fuck this up somehow, I think I would be lower down on your list of concerns.” Rowan started walking again, pushing between the low-hanging branches of two old willow trees.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that I think Con would beat me to you. He may be younger than Lin and Mia, but he’s fiercely protective when it comes to his sisters.” The miniature version of Rowan Whitehorn was a hellion naturally, but it was worse when something had happened to the twins. Fenrys had seen a little bit of that protection show the day the mating bond had settled.

“Speaking of, have you noticed Con has been spending a lot of time with Kallias lately? I’ve found them together a few times in the library, though Connall usually catches me from the corner of his eye and darts away. Poor Kal is always left confused and I think a little hurt.” There was a low chuckle from Rowan, his head shaking.

“I’ve seen them. I’ve known about my son’s preference for males for years, but I think he’s scared to tell us. I think they might even get a little shock of their own in a couple of years, honestly.” Interesting. “Aelin is desperate to call him out on it, but I’ve told her this is something he needs to sort out within himself first. He’ll tell us when he’s ready, though I hope it’s soon, because all I want is for him to be who he wants.” He was about to retort when Rowan halted them abruptly, nodding his head to the right of them. When he turned in that direction, his breath caught a little in his throat. There, in amongst the trees, was a small little yellow cottage. It was dark inside and Fenrys could smell the stale scent of pine and snow, indicating Rowan had been he but not recently.

“Rowan?”

The male in question dug into one of the pockets on his breeches, and pulled a small, silver key that glinted in the few rays of sunlight that shone through the canopy. “I started building this when Aelin told me she was with child, and then started another one after she had announced it would be twins. I knew that when they were all grown up, my children would want to leave and live independently, to be their own person. I also knew it would be hard for us to let them out of our sight, so I wanted to give them somewhere that they were far enough away from us, but somewhere I knew they would be safe, protected.” He pressed the key into the palm of Fenrys’ hand and folded his fingers over it. The metal was cool in his palm, barely weighing anything at all. “You and Evalin don’t have to live here of course, but I wanted her to know there was a place for her to start this new adventure with you.”

“I don’t know what to say.” There were things Fenrys knew he should say, but the words got stuck in his throat.

“There’s no need to say anything.” Rowan’s eyes were lined with silver as he ran his eyes over the place he’d created for his child. It wasn’t hard to imagine being here with Eva, it wasn’t hard at all.

“You said you started another when you knew it was going to be twins, did you start another when Aelin told you about Connall?” His friend wiped at his eyes quickly before nodding in confirmation.

“Yes. Mia’s is to the west of here, barely any distance from here at all and closer to the lake. I built Con’s to the east side of the castle, actually. There’s a small cavern close to it that has a hot spring inside, which I thought would be good for practicing.”

The two of them stayed out there for a little while longer, occasionally letting a content silence between them, or talking about all sorts of topics and reminiscing on the past. Soon enough, they were on the move again, reaching the castle just in time for Elide and Lorcan’s arrival, Aelin waiting for them with a glare. It was possible that they were a little behind when they said they’d be back. Fenrys tried to greet his friend’s as they arrived, little ones in tow, but Rowan stopped him with a hand to his shoulder, telling him to go and rest because he had a big day tomorrow. He let out a breath and agreed, walking back to his room without stopping to say hello to anyone.

When he was washed and settled into bed, Fenrys let the darkness take him into the land of dreams with a smile on his face.

Tomorrow, he was getting married.

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Let me know what you thought! I’m sorry for being so behind on things:( If you’re not in the tags but you’ve asked to be, just give me a shout and I’ll fix it asap, I don’t think my lists are updating properly<3

Tags: @empress-sei @acourtofterrasenandvelaris @tswaney17 @queen-of-glass @thesirenwashere @awkward-avocado-s @b00kworm @http-itsrebecca @eatmysandwiches @poisonous00 @flowersinvegas @julemmaes @mu-si-ca-l @spyofthenightcourt @sis-it-dont-add-up @mad-madeline-ace @df3ndyr @jesstargaryenqueen @notyournymphetish @nightcourtcinnamonroll @acourtofmarauders @rhyswhitethorn @booknerdproblems @sevenfreckles-for-sevenloves @aelinfeyreeleven945tbln @lucy617 @ireallyshouldsleeprn @mis-lil-red @eleonor-da-silva @silentquartz

#throne of glass #tog #fenrys moonbeam #rowan whitethorn #aelin galythinius #fenrys x original #tog fic #throne of glass series #original characters #connall #my fic #my writing #haz writes

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

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Survey #350

“let’s play a love game, play a love game / do you want love, or you want fame? / are you in the game?”

Who was your first good kiss with? Jason. Would you kiss this person again? I know I fucking would and I hate it more than I could possibly express. Name something that is on your bedroom wall? Lots of artwork, mostly of meerkats. What accessory do you want in your bedroom? I need another desk to put stuff on. If you could paint your walls any color what would it be? Something pastel. Maybe like, peach. Soft and warm and would really bring light to the room. What does your phone case look like? It's just this boring purple one that came with the phone. What do you take the most pictures of? My camera roll says my pets, hahaha. What is the point of Twitter for you? Liking Mark's shit lmao. What does your planner look like? I don’t have one. If you get into an argument what is it usually about? My anxiety, I think. What are you always in the mood for? Ummm probably a car ride where I can control the music in the passenger seat. It is very, very rare I'll turn that opportunity down. What’s the last emergency you dealt with? I don't really know; I'm thankfully not in these situations very much, especially when you're cooped up at home. I probably haven't been actually engaged in an emergency since I had to call 911 for my mom before she found out about her cancer. She was basically immobile from agony in her abdomen. Do you have a son? I'm perfectly happy without a son, or kids period. Are you married? No. Have you ever worn a suit? I haven't. Have you ever had to call 911? Twice for Mom. How many keys are on your key-ring? Just one for the house. What’s the last thing you created? An RP post would count as art creation, I'd say. Who are your closest friends? Sara, Girt, and uh... Well, they might be it as far as friends I consider truly close to me. I have a few other people I consider good friends, but we're just not like... on that "close" level, you know? Lisa is maybe another, and Lyndsey perhaps, both WoW friends. Are you ready to have a family? I hate that "have a family" tends to mean get married and have kids, which I'm guessing is what you're implying. If that's the case, no, given I don't want kids and am not fit to get married right now. I'm not even with anyone. I'm content right now with just living with my mom and my two pets, who are children well enough to me. Have you ever taken a DNA test? No. Do you have a family cemetery? No. Would you say you have a high sex drive or not so much? *shrugs* I think it's pretty normal. How do you feel about swallowing pills? What do you mean how do I "feel" about it? I just do it if I need to. What animal is the scariest in your opinion? Some kind of bug, probably. Giant centipedes creep me the fuck out, for one, and I've heard their bite is incredibly painful. I've also always been very afraid of Australia's funnel web spiders since watching some show on Animal Planet when I was younger; I think it scarred me for life, aha. And let's not forget the murder hornets. No thnx, rather die. :') Have you ever questioned your sanity? Way more than once, my friend. How do you feel about people wearing fur coats? Are you for or against it? I am VIOLENTLY against it unless it is for survival in extreme climates and you don't have access to other material. That aside, there is NO way you could possibly convince me that it's okay to wear the fur of something once living on yourself for ~fashion~. What’s the worst thing a friend has either done or said to you? Let's not go here. What’s fake about you? Like extensions, fake nails, botox etc. Nothing. If you got the chance, would you audition for a reality show? No. Have you ever gotten into a Facebook fight? Haha, yeah. Favorite flavor of jelly bean? Probably watermelon or strawberry. I'm not a massive jellybean fan. Do you use Tinder? If yes, have you ever met up with someone you matched? I've never tried it, no. What book/movie has made you cry the hardest? Either The Notebook or Titanic. Something you feared as a kid but don’t anymore? Thunderstorms. What’s your skincare routine? I don't really have one. Just wash it with water in the shower and then use a washcloth when I feel the need. Would you rather have a snake or a tarantula as a pet? I want both, but I prefer snakes. What is something you are NOT looking forward to? I both am and am not looking forward to my second Covid vaccine because it's notoriously worse than the first; the only bright side to it is that after the potential side effects blow over, I'm job hunting. What do you usually do right when you wake up? Check the time on my phone. Would you rather eat your pizza cold or hot? Hot, but I like both. Who taught you how to swim? Dad, I think? Can you do push-ups? No. Do you like Doritos? Yesssss. Who is the closest friend that you live by? I don't know. Have you ever banged your head against something? I've had two concussions before, so, y'know. Have you ever jumped on a trampoline? Yeah, I loved that as a kid. Do you like watching scary movies? Yeah. Has anyone ever told you that you have a big butt? No, considering I have like no ass, rip. Has one of your friends ever tried to "hook you up?" Ugh, yes. Do you prefer landmarks or street names when being given directions? Landmarks, by a mile. Although, I'm super bad with directions, so it probably wouldn't really matter much. Do you read the prologues in the beginnings of books? Yeah, you got to. Does your house have more than one fireplace? No. What was your favourite gym class moment? The one and only thing I liked about gym as a kid was when you took one of those rainbow tarps and made like, an air bubble underneath to make this awesome dome everyone sat in. Ya missed out if you didn't do that. Do you think that ocean boardwalks are fun? Yeah. Do you dread when people ask you to sign their yearbooks? Not at all; I was always flattered, knowing they cared enough to want mine. Apple Jacks: yay or nay? I looove those. Do you have a favorite Scooby-Doo movie? Haha yeah, I think it's the second one? Such iconic scenes. It's the one with the Mary Jane girl that Shaggy liked... oh, jokes that went over your head as a kid. Who were your last 3 Facebook messages from and what do they say? I'm too lazy to list the convos themselves, but the people involved are my friends Chelsea and Ian, as well as a friend's mother. Do you turn your phone off at night when you go to sleep? No. It's always on vibrate, and I just turn the brightness way down. What is the sexual orientation of the last person you talked to? She's straight. What’s your favourite hairstyle on the opposite sex? Don't you fucking dare laugh, emo hair is A++. Has anyone ever played a prank on you? What happened? Not a big one, no. Do you like the Silent Hill movies? Do I?! I love the first one (though for a while I wasn't very happy they swapped the lead role from Harry to his wife), and while the second is literal trash story-wise and it's ALL over the damn place, I still enjoy it with just how much I adore SH as a whole. What movie scared you the most out of any other movies? The Rite, because the concept of being raped and impregnated by a demon is fucking horrifying to me. Have you ever wanted to be on American Idol? When was this? Nah. Name 5 things you don’t believe in. 1.) "Everything happens for a reason;" 2.) karma; 3.) destiny/fate; 4.) psychics, fortune tellers, all that; and 5.) luck, at least in the sense of someone having set "good" or "bad" luck. If you could have any friend that you’ve lost back, who would you pick? Probably Megan. If you have pets, who normally puts food and water in their dish? Me for both of them. Do you organize the pictures on your computer into different folders or are they all just under “My Pictures”? I have folders. Do you think if someone is in a relationship, that it is acceptable to have sleepovers with other people of their preferred sex? Eh, nah, that feels a bit far to me. I am very firmly for friends still being able to hang out even if they're each other's preferred gender, but a sleepover sounds a bit too intimate, even without sharing a bed. Would you shoot a gun if given the chance? If you’ve shot a gun before, how many different types of guns have you shot? No. I'm very intimidated by guns and nearly shook when I merely handed a friend his (not for anything bad, he just carried it with him when he goes out), and I've got noooo plans of holding one again unless my life depends on it. Do you feel uncomfortable sharing things like artwork or poetry you’ve written? Is it because you don’t think it’s good enough to show off or because it’s too personal? You. Have. Zero. Idea. It's for both reasons, and it's far more severe in person. Online, I actually don't mind much, oddly enough... I can't quite pin down why. Do you have any siblings you absolutely despise? Why do you despise them? No. Do knives scare you? Is it from watching scary movies? Knives scare me like five times more than guns. Scary movies have nothing to do with it, though. They're just so sharp and the idea of being stabbed by one is terrifying. As someone with a history of self-mutilation too (not with knives, but I've thought about it and once planned to slit my throat with one, but Mom stopped me), they just make me incredibly uncomfortable to the point I can barely hold a "real" knife to just slice food. Have you ever climbed a chain-link fence? Many times. What is your LEAST favorite Disney animated movie? That I've seen, uhhhhh... I don't know man, there are way too many Disney movies lmao. Who was the last person’s house you went to besides your own? My sister's. On YouTube, who are two people you find hilarious? I'm just counting GameGrumps as one, and then you can't forget Shane Dawson, regardless of the controversy. He probably made me laugh more than any other YouTuber. Do you shave your pits? Yeah. Do you know anyone who has been on life support, and survived? I don't think so. Besides the USA, what is your favorite country? I'm not nearly informed enough about foreign countries' politics and laws and mannerisms to have a favorite. Would you rather go to Europe or Asia? Europe. Would you rather go to Africa or Australia? Africa. Would you rather go to Mexico or Canada? Canada. Do you think emo/scene hair is attractive? I love emo and scene hair, don't @ me, it's cute as fuck. Have you ever seen a ghost orb picture? Lots, actually, at one of my old houses that I totally know was haunted. Do you think abortion should be illegal? NO. You would NOT end abortions. You would end SAFE abortions. Do any of your pets have strange habits? Explain? Venus, my ball python, is extremely odd with food to the point I sometimes worry about her, but she's always been this way and is healthy, so I guess it's nothing really worth fretting over. Anyway, when I place her rat in her terrarium, she gets excited first and will pretty much frantically examine her surroundings, like slithering around everywhere, and even when she has clearly found the rat (she'll even prod it with her snout), she usually won't immediately eat. She just like... sits there and has to continue to verify for ten minutes that it's food. I know it's thawed perfectly, btw. So anyway, THAT'S weird... As for Roman, dear god, that cat's just weird, lmao. Especially in the morning, he's very hyper and will bolt around the house sometimes, he "plays" with nothing all the time, he "meerkat"s at nothing that I can nothing, etc. etc. etc. He's a weirdo lol. Have you ever told an extremely inappropriate joke? Oh god, I said something really inapprops once when my friend Chelsea startled me. I won't be repeating it lmao. Who in life have you felt the strongest need to protect? Sara, I think. Who have you most feared in your life? My dad. He doesn't scare me anymore, but he did. What was the quickest friendship you ever made? Oh idk. What is the worst word anyone ever used to describe you? "Martyr." And not the kind that dies for their beliefs. It hurt me so badly to know someone thought of me that way, and I'll probably never let it go. If you have any pets, were they adopted from the humane society? No. Roman is one of the billion kittens born to the cats my sister's in-laws have, and Venus is from a ball python breeding business in Florida called The Gourmet Rodent (they sell f/t rodents too, obvs) Do you like home design, like picking out paint colors and furniture? Not really. My grandmother though, whew, that was her calling for sure. Have you seen any of the old James Bond movies? Nope. List all of your features that you have ever gotten compliments on: My hair, my eyes, my tattoos, my hands, I think my nose, my dimples, my smile, and my boobs lmao. Have you ever been in a hot air balloon? And if not, would you ever want to go in one? I haven't. I think it'd be kinda cool, but they seem too easy to fall out of, and I'm afraid of heights. I'd probably go in one if given the opportunity. Do you have any stains on your shirt currently? No, but there are two small rips. It's just an old tank top. Do you listen to local bands? No. Not that I'm opposed, I just don't know of any I really enjoy. Do you watch YouTube videos often? Many, many daily. Do your parents fight? Do they even talk at all? They're divorced; they used to fight a lot when they were together. Now they only talk if they have reason to. Have you ever watched a movie that's in a complete different language, so you had to read sub-titles? No. Do people with yellow teeth disgust you? Dude, fuck off, no. My teeth are kinda yellow, and I'm extremely self-conscious about it, so seriously fuck this question. You never know for sure why someone's teeth may seem yellowish. Do you drink alcohol on New Year’s Eve? Usually a drink or two. Do you wear rings? I always have two on, yeah. Are you hungry right now? No, I literally just ate a breakfast bowl. Have you ever tried smoking a cigarette? No; I haven't the slightest interest in doing so.

#survey #surveys #questions #lyrics: ''lovegame'' by lady gaga

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marmolady · 5 years

Text

Roots

Book/Series: Endless Summer

Main Pairings: Estela x MC/Taylor (f)

Summary: Post-ending (Endless Ending) Follow on from ‘Home, Sweet Home’. Taylor is adjusting to a life beyond La Huerta, and seeing for the first time what she’s really missing.

Word Count: 5741

Warnings: Coarse language, non-graphic sexual content

Reviews and reblogs are hugely appreciated!

Tagging: @brightpinkpeppercorn @sceptilemasterr @bbaba-yagaa@edgydepressedchoicesthot@blightarts@princessstellaris@acidsugar0@taramitch96 @sapphovonchat @strangerofbraidwood @noeschoices @kennaxval @queerchoicesblog

A small smile played on Nicolas’ face as he turned another page in the album. His eyes skimmed images he’d long been afraid of seeing, the memories painful in light of all that had been lost. He lingered upon the face of a young girl, frozen in time, caught in a laugh. That sweet smile was so distant a recollection that he’d almost forgotten it had ever been there. He’d grieved that carefree child.

Hearing the faint sounds of stirring, the wiry silver-haired man rose to put some water on to boil. It had been so very long since he’d shared his home; not since Estela had left for Hartfeld, putting into motion what he’d been sure would be her destruction. It had been his greatest failure. That his niece was alive -alive and a free woman, back home at last, was something of a miracle. Nicolas had no faith in miracles.

It was the pilot who stumbled out of bed and down the hall first, hair ruffled from being slept on.

“Buenos días, Lobito.”

“Hey, I told ya, Master Shifu, nicknames are my thing!”

“How I would hate to step on your toes… I trust you are well rested?” Nicolas poured out a steaming mug of coffee for his guest.

Jake took the drink with a word of thanks and ran his free hand over his stubble, thoughtful. This was not exactly where he’d expected to find himself, hiding out in his favourite sparring partner’s San Trobidan home. Estela had been desperate that he wouldn’t retreat back to a life of solitude, of putting on a carefree air that hid the truth of himself. He had been resistant, but when the chips fell, he’d taken the chance to dream of something better. For the time being, that meant going with the flow, trusting that between his friends -now as good as family-, gaining his freedom would be just another challenge that they’d rise to. Estela had been right about him; he wasn’t ready to give up the people he loved.

“I slept all right.” He paused. “Ya know, when I agreed to come, I didn’t realise I’d be taking Katniss’ mom’s old room. I told her I didn’t mind takin’ the couch…”

Nicolas shook his head briskly. “Don’t be stupid. It’s just a bed. If I’m honest, it’s a nice change to have the house not feel like it’s echoing with ghosts. If Estela had a problem, she’d let you know. I’m sure you already know that.”

Jake couldn’t hold back a quiet snicker. Damn straight, he already knew that. “Man, do I. You raised a force of nature, right there. I wouldn’t mess with her. But it’s like she gets it in her head the way things should be, even if it ain’t what she needs.” He sat down at the table across from the older man, and glanced over the album, then noticed the wistful expression on Nicolas’ face.

“I always wanted her safe,” the silver-haired man said sadly. “It was why I was involved in this damn war to begin with, why I taught her to fight, to survive since she was small. But then Olivia was killed. In her grief, everything I’d done to protect Estela made her a danger to herself. I tried still to guide her, to give her half a chance to succeed. To stop her would be to stop a runaway train; I could not, but I could try to minimise the damage. When she left, I knew I had failed her. The little girl my sister had loved so much was gone. The war had been won, but the very thing that had inspired me to fight for a better future was destroying itself. I knew I would likely never see her again, long before the news reached me that she’d been among of group of students who’d disappeared on Rourke’s island.”

Over his coffee, Jake found himself thinking of his own family… back home waiting for him, no doubt having come to accept that he was lost to them for good. It had to be the worst kind of torture. They knew now, at least, that he was alive… or he had been on the fateful day he’d set off for La Huerta. What needed to be said… Jake wasn’t sure it could be done over the phone. Not after all these years. He looked up from the coffee and realised that Nicolas was reading him like a book.

“I’ll put my folks outta their misery soon. Maybe it’s selfish to wait, but I can’t bring myself face them before they know the truth. Hearin’ the shame in my mom’s voice? It’s bad enough in my head, let alone… ya know?”

Nicolas took a long drink of coffee and sat up straight. “It’s never too late to go home. Whatever lies she’s been told; no doubt your mother will be ready to hear your story whenever you are ready to share it. I understand, though. I have always been so proud of what I’ve been fighting for; to have it twisted into everything you’ve stood against… that cannot be easy to bear.”

“Huh, that it ain’t,” said Jake dryly. “But I’ve gotta believe someday soon it’s gonna change. I’ve been too scared to hope for so long… guess that’s the first step. I know what I’ve got, and I’m sure as hell not gonna throw it away.”

“Well, I’ll drink to that, my friend.”

There was a shuffling of two pairs of feet on the old tiled floor. Estela practically skipped to her uncle, and threw her arms around him in a big hug. “Morning, Tio!”

“Morning, Estelita.” Nicolas couldn’t help but be tickled by the obvious spring in her step. “I take it you slept well.”

“Yes. I didn’t realise I missed my old bed. It felt nice to sleep there, and with Taylor.”

“Aw!” Taylor took Estela in her arms so that they were pressed cheek-to-cheek, and squeezed her around the middle.

“Dios, girl, you really are getting soft!”

Estela rolled her eyes defiantly, but held her wife all the tighter. She noticed the album her tio had spread across the table. “It didn’t take you long to drag that out. I’ve been back five minutes and you go straight to the embarrassing photos.”

Jake’s eyes gleamed. “Totally here for baby Katniss in ugly dresses… Nineties fashion, can’t beat it, ya’ll.”

“Ah, you caught me reminiscing…” said Nicolas.

“And I’m going soft, Tio?”

“Oh, who cares?” Taylor said, jiggling with excitement. “I’m all in for baby Estela!” She leaned in close and cooed, laughing a little as Estela hid her face. “So. Freaking. Cute. I can’t even take it.”

They gathered around, poring over the photographs. A whole life in pictures; so much that Taylor could never have truly imagined. She reached out, delicately stroking an image that seemed to grab her right by the heart. A tiny Estela, barely more than a newborn, held tenderly against her mother’s chest. Oh, how Olivia looked at that little baby… the love was so intense it felt to radiate off the paper. Somewhere in her subconscious, Taylor knew she’d felt it before, when she’d been lost beyond the world of the living. It made her heart ache. For what had been taken from Estela. For what she herself had never had.

“This one’s beautiful…” she croaked.

Estela had turned away, pained. She nodded, almost imperceptibly, before recovering herself. “Yes. She was very beautiful. Sadly under the delusion that little me looked good in tie-dye, but I guess no one’s perfect.”

Feeling Taylor’s gentle pressure on her hand, and concerned eyes studying her, Estela made the effort to give her a smile. It was all right. Memories hurt, but they were also healing.

The pages kept turning, a life playing out before their eyes. Birthdays, holidays… and all those small moments that stuck in the mind, building the person Estela would become. Such rich depth was almost beyond Taylor’s comprehension… how limited her view on the world was. Bittersweet emotion churned through her; love and loneliness, the piece of her heart that was Estela swelled, but the rest echoingly hollow. That her own emptiness might threaten to overwhelm her was, Taylor knew, completely selfish. This wasn’t about her. What mattered was that her wife was helped along the process of letting go. Looking at the serene face of a young Estela, surely no older than nine, sitting by a campfire, toasting marshmallows with her mother, Taylor pushed away those intrusive thoughts. She fondled with Estela’s fingers and smiled as she felt the gesture returned.

“Where is that? It looks pretty.”

“It’s a way out of town. We used to go out there a lot when I was little, actually, before the fighting spilled out into that part of the country. There were trails through the forest, all leading out to the most beautiful lake. I’ll take you there sometime.”

“I’d like that.”

Aware of the emotional undercurrents just below the surface Jake was uncharacteristically cautious about taking shots at Estela’s expense, and, for the most part, took in what was being shared with him quietly. That he was invited in to see her vulnerable meant something to him, and he was honestly touched.

“What- wait a minute! How old are you, waving that sword around?” Suddenly, Jake’s eyes were like saucers. That girl was a special kind of hardcore… and he was immeasurably grateful that they tended to be fighting on the same side.

Estela shrugged. “About fourteen. I wasn’t especially skilled, even though Tio had sort of taught me with blunted blades before then.”

“That would be around the time he stabbed you, right?” Taylor queried, automatically glancing to her wife’s chest, where she knew a jagged scar told the story.

“Woah, what?!”

Nicolas scowled. “It does not sound good when you say it like that. Estelita, what stories have you been telling her about me?”

With a snort, Estela shook her head. “Only the truth. I did mention that it was my fault for being stubborn and overconfident. But, yes, that was just before Tio nearly gutted me.”

Jake gave an appreciative whistle. “Still; next-level badass. Colour me impressed.”

“Mom was not. We tried to hide it, but she could always see right through me.” Estela shared a conspiratorial smile with her uncle. “I think that’s the maddest I ever saw her.”

“Joder! She wanted to bury me alive. Impaling her bebé on a sword- ha!”

“So, no more sword-fighting lessons… that Mom knew about, anyhow.”

______________________________________________

For Taylor, San Trobida was a brave new world, one that she took on with her characteristic daring. She had Estela right beside her, after all, who knew the place like the back of her hand. It was eye-opening. When they went for groceries for Nicolas, it occurred to Taylor that she hadn’t so much as walked into a supermarket in her life. It was the stupidest little thing, but it made her bravado falter. Estela zipped around efficiently, knowing where to find everything she needed, for she’d gone through the routine countless times before, since she was a child trailing along by her mother’s hand. She pointed out all the little things to Taylor and Jake; the cakes her mom would bring home on special occasions, the sought-after snacks that the kids in school would get into fist fights over… the small details that made the place wonderfully nostalgic. Jake countered with his own childhood tales. And then there was Taylor, for whom that kind of profound nostalgia was something she could only dream of. She kept on smiling, appreciating those windows into her friends’ lives, but somewhere beneath it, there was longing.

“Earth to Princess!”

Taylor was stirred to her senses, looking out over the beach, now bustling with locals. They’d settled down there for lunch having throw together a modest picnic. Quietly taking it all in, Taylor had found herself dwelling once more on that hollow feeling in her heart.

“Are you okay, Taylor?” Estela asked, offering her a plate. “You look like you’re miles away.”

“Oh, yeah- fine. Just tired, that’s all.” They had only just made the journey to San Trobida the day before, after an emotionally taxing farewell to their friends. Considering that just over a week ago Taylor had been clinging to life by a thread, it was natural that she be exhausted. The look that Estela gave her, though, suggested that she wasn’t buying it. “I’ll be fine once I’ve got some food down me. Pass the patacones…”

Estela let it rest… for the time being. She trusted that if something was bothering Taylor, she’d let her know in her own time. She loaded up Taylor’s plate and left a kiss on her cheek. Truth be told, being home was strange for her too. In the years leading up to her departure, she’d rarely come up for breath between helping her tio in the rebellion and readying herself to bring Rourke down. Any waking moment that she wasn’t needed for something, she’d be training her body, pushing herself farther, harder. Now… it was hard to know what to do with herself. She couldn’t exercise, not with her savaged leg still healing. All that she had to share with Taylor and Jake were ghosts from a distant past, the past she’d never given herself the space to properly grieve.

Her thoughts were disturbed by Taylor violently spluttering her juice.

“Tio! You’ve gotta warn people before you add booze to their drinks.” Estela took a sip and grimaced. “And that’s way too much. She’d be dancing naked on the tables after two solid gulps.”

Jake scoffed. “Lightweight!” He reached for the boozed-up juice and chinked it to Nicolas’ glass. “Cheers.”

With a roll of her eyes, Taylor edged a little closer to her wife and spoke under her breath. “So, uh, we’ll save that naked dancing for later, right?”

After lunch, Jake went off on his own, staking out this new environment. Estela and Taylor walked -or limped in Estela’s case- with Nicolas along the edge of the water, sharing stories. The limp was of some concern to Nicolas; his niece had taken some brutal knocks and scrapes in her time, but that lameness could be plaguing her for some time to come. Still, she was still in better shape than he’d expected to find her. Oblivious to his worry for her, Estela was cheery… abnormally so, as if on some sort of high from the simple pleasure of being home. She laughed airily as she lashed out at him, goading her tio into a playful scuffle. Nicolas jabbed her hard in the ribs, but she just giggled and retaliated further. It was new. They’d sparred so many times before, but it had been purposeful, deadly serious. Now… now Estela just wanted to play, to reach out and love her uncle. Frolicking like a spring lamb, she overexerted her poor leg and collapsed into the wet sand, a goofy grin still on her face, even as Nicolas took the opportunity to clock her around the head.

Seeing her wife so completely at ease fed Taylor’s soul. It was hard to believe how far Estela had come from the woman who was prepared to throw all of this away if it meant she could take her revenge. Taylor had brought her home. Her short life amounted to very little, and she felt it acutely, but was one impact she wore with pride. There it was again; that feeling of being… incomplete. The rapport that Estela had with Nicolas, born of a full life history, of seeking the love and guidance of a parental figure; Taylor couldn’t have known quite what she was missing until she’d seen it, shining and wonderful before her.

All of a sudden, that utter joy she felt for Estela slipped away, replaced with something new. It was deep envy, almost… resentment. Sickened with herself for feeling it even momentarily, Taylor just wanted to hide in shame. That wasn’t the person she was; this was what she’d been prepared to sacrifice herself for. But facing up to the truth of what she was had thrown her.

San Trobida was as scarred and beaten down as the people who lived there, but it was rich with people and their experiences. Every other person they crossed paths with, Nicolas had a story to tell of… most frequently of hardship during the difficult years of the civil war. The woman holding the fresh smoothie stall, whose son had been in the year above Estela in elementary school, who’d perished at the age of only fifteen having joined the faction rising up against Salazar… when they’d greeted her, she looked at Estela with a heart-rending mixture of joy sorrow in her prematurely aged eyes, and offered them each a drink on the house. It reminded Taylor how shallow her life experience was; she had known and loved Estela all her life, but Estela’s life was made up of so much more than that small window. On La Huerta, lost with her friends at the end of the world, she hadn’t felt just how alien she was; but this was reality, and everything she lacked weighed heavy. Taylor had nothing beyond her not-even-two-years of existence. No connections, no roots woven into a family, a place, or a community. No history, no childhood. And no one could ever truly understand.

Ashamed of herself, Taylor was distant and quiet for the rest of the day, despite all attempts at putting on a brave face. When Jake innocently tried to goad a smile out of her, she all but took his head off, and then felt even worse. Of all the people to take it out on… he had everything she was longing for, but it was all out of his reach. It was just so messed up, and she couldn’t stand it. Taylor retreated further into herself, explaining away her behaviour to a concerned Estela simply as tiredness. By dinnertime, genuine exhaustion exacerbated her nagging sadness, and she couldn’t wait to retreat to her bed, to stop pretending.

_______________________________________

With the dinner dishes put away, Taylor finally sank into the mattress, and felt relief course through her body. No more putting on a brave face. Estela followed after her, dark eyes soft with concern.

“Taylor…” she said quietly. “Is all this weirding you out? You can talk to me.”

Looking away, Taylor nodded. “A little, yeah. I… I think I need to take a lie down. Is that okay?”

“Oh. Okay. Do you want me to get you anything?”

“Maybe a glass of water? And a kiss, please.”

Estela reeled Taylor in and held her against her chest, leaning down to kiss her forehead. “…Te amo.”

Taylor hugged back, utterly grateful for the woman who’d invited her to share her world. She’d find her place there for sure, but the kind of connection she craved, that would take time.

“…Love you too. So, so much.”

As she went to leave, Estela’s gaze lingered on her wife’s eyes, reading the strange sadness that hung there and silently giving her support. This was what they’d dreamed of, but that didn’t make it easy. To be on the outside, seeing the world in a way that everyone around could not begin to understand… Estela knew it, she’d felt it herself. She couldn’t offer her soulmate a past, memories to fill that hollow void; all she could do was to take Taylor and ensure she was deeply entwined into her world as it stood now. To make her feel that this was real, that it was hers.

Left alone, Taylor fell backwards into the mattress with a heavy sigh and stared at the ceiling. Within moments, her cheeks were wet. She wiped away the tears hastily and breathed deeply. Guilt gnawed at her. She should have been happy, not raining on Estela’s parade. But even just in that small room, there was so much history, and it made her feel tiny. The mattress shifted as Estela sat down. Taylor nuzzled into the hand that stroked her face, and kissed Estela’s wrist.

“Here…” Estela offered the water, helping her wife to sit up. While Taylor sipped, she massaged her shoulders and back. “Does this help?”

“…Mmmmmm… you’re good at that. Thanks, love.” Even as she relaxed into the soothing touch, her quiet insecurities and loneliness lingered. How ridiculous, she thought, to feel lonely, when she was so very much loved. “I know it’s dumb. I just hadn’t quite felt how much I was missing. Not until I saw you with your tio. And looking through all those photos. You’ve lived a real life… and I know it’s not been an easy one, but… but it’s what you’re made from. You’ve got real memories, family. With me, there’s nothing… nothing beneath the surface.”

“You have family, Taylor. It looks different, but that doesn’t mean it’s not real.” Estela gently brushed away a lock of blonde hair and kissed the back of Taylor’s neck. “And it’s not dumb to feel that way. You’re only human.”

Taylor sniffed and leaned back into Estela, letting her arms and legs wrap around her from behind. Only human… ha.

“Oh, if only.”

“Look, people can be alive for ages and never actually live. It’s not been long, I get it, but the way you touched us all… that’s not nothing. All the best parts of me are there because of you. It’s not blood, but that doesn’t mean it matters less.”

Her lip trembled, and Taylor felt herself squeezed lovingly. Estela trailed kisses up her neck and along her jaw. Held tight, Taylor could cry out her sadness without shame or fear of judgement.

“Love you, Estela,” she sniffed. “I know I’m lucky. Incredibly lucky.”

“But it must be lonely. It’s not as if anyone can really understand what this is like for you. I just wish I could help.”

Taylor nodded and wiped her face, before reaching back to fondle the dark hair that tickled her cheek. “Yeah… yeah, it is… kind of lonely. But you do help. I feel guilty for wanting anything more than that- I’m so damn happy with you, and it’s a miracle that it’s even possible.” She sighed. “Maybe I just needed a good cry, you know?”

“You’re allowed to feel more than one thing at once.” Adjusting herself so she could look her wife in the eye, Estela studied Taylor with tender concern. “Hey… if this is too much for you, we don’t have to stay long. We can go back to La Huerta anytime. Whatever you need.”

“No. No, it’s not that I’m not happy here. I love it here. It’s like I can feel you all around me, and it’s magic. I’m really excited to get to know your tio… but part of me wishes we could just skip to the part where I’m family to him.”

Estela shook her head, an amused smile coming to her face. “Taylor, he loves you already! There was almost enough rum in that juice he poured you at lunch to knock you unconscious. That’s Tio speak for ‘welcome to the family, chica; you’re in’. If I hadn’t hammered it in that you’re supposed to be resting, he’d be training you up on the sword by now.”

In spite of everything, Taylor giggled. “That was a hella strong drink. It’s no wonder you can handle your alcohol if he was the man who raised you.”

“Tio doesn’t warm to people that quick; he can see that you’re my family, real as anything.” For a little while, Estela was quiet, searching her mind for the best way to help. It dawned on her that she was not the person best placed to give what Taylor needed. She pulled her phone from her pocket. “Here. You should give Diego a call. I’d guess he’s been missing you.”

Taylor’s eyes grew misty at her loyal friend’s name, and she gave an appreciative nod. “Yes. I bet he has.” She brought Estela’s face close to hers, until their lips met. “Thank you. Really.”

Caressing her lover’s face, Estela kissed her once more. “You’re not alone, love. Never.” With one last squeeze of her shoulders, she left Taylor to make the call.

The phone rang. Taylor, suddenly anxious to hear Diego’s voice, strummed her fingers against her thigh. Pick up, pick up…

“Taylor-baby!”

And then a huge grin split her face. “Diego! You haven’t forgotten me? Found a new BFF?”

Diego laughed. “You caught me. I’m best-friend-cheating on you with Raj. What can I say? There’s a special bond you can only get by being Freaky Fridayed with someone.”

“I know you’re shit-stirring, but that’s not funny, okay? It’s crazy how much I miss you already. Well, everyone really, but especially you.”

“Uh, Taylor, it’s been a day…”

Taylor faltered. Man, it had felt so much longer... “I know. I’ve just… never known any different. Actually getting out here in the world beyond La Huerta, it’s kinda confronting.”

For a moment, Diego was quiet, as though picking up on her underlying sadness. “Hey, put it on video. I’ve never video called to San Trobida.”

Clicking on the video mode, Taylor couldn’t hold back the smile when she saw her friend grinning back at her. “Here you go. San Trobida. I’m just hanging out in Estela’s room right now; I’m pretty wrecked to be honest. So, how’s Raj’s place? What’s his grandma like?”

“Eh, you’re still recovering from being almost dead; you’re allowed to be wrecked. Once we got back home, I realised just how much I couldn’t face my parents right now. They’ve ignored my messages, so nothing new. But it’s all good, all good… it’s not as if I’m all alone on the world. It’s pretty chill here- obviously. Raj’s grandma is seriously the nicest person on earth; she’s like… a walking hug. And ohmygod, the food! We’re actually gonna have a big dinner with everyone round before I head back to La Huerta.”

“Ugh, I am crazy jealous that you get to meet and get fed by the famous Grandma Bhandarkar…”

They chatted happily, and Taylor’s woes felt so much less significant, forgotten in the excitement of catching up with all that had happened in the day her friends had spent home again. At one point, Diego took the phone briefly into the kitchen, where Raj and his grandmother were cooking dinner together, putting Taylor on speaker to say hi. The laughter slowly faded to a comfortable silence as Diego studied her quietly.

“Taylor… you are okay, right? I’m pretty indebted to you in the pep talk department, so you can lay it all on me.”

If only he knew how much she appreciated him… so much more than the sidekick he’d once considered himself. Taylor’s smile wobbled but held up. “I’m okay,” she said, firmly. “I think Estela wanted you to pep talk me up, but actually… I know what you would have said to me. And I know you’d be right.”

“…You’re losing me now…”

“Thing is, I’ve got all caught up in my head, feeling I’m missing out on some of the stuff that matters most. You know; history, family, a childhood… I’m not really even freaking human.”

“But you are.”

Taylor smirked. “That’s what I knew you were gonna say.” Her smile grew broader. “Vaanu made me from you, and then when I was broken, you all rebuilt me. My memories of you rebuilt me. So I guess… you’re my family. And the rest I… it’ll just take some time.”

“Of course we’re your family, you dope!” Diego’s eyes had grown misty. “The best kind. It’s not about being related to someone. My mom and dad…” His voice cracked. “Let’s just say, they’re not a great model of what family should be. We’re not like that, you and me.”

“No, we’re not like that. I guess, go through the end of the world together, you’ve got a bond that can withstand anything.”

Diego smiled sadly. “We better bring my parents along to the next apocalypse, right?”

Taylor wished she could reach through the screen and hug him. In her longing, she’d oversimplified the human experience. Being a bit of a mess- now that was human. “I’m always here for you,” she whispered. “And you know… they’ll come around. You saw it, and I honestly believe they’re gonna wake up someday and realise how amazing you are.”

“So, uh, I guess we just ride this out together. ‘til it gets easier.”

“You got it. I’m sending you a virtual hug and we’ll talk real soon, okay? Love you, buddy.”

The warmth in Diego’s eyes was palpable, even through the window of the small screen. “Talk later, Taylor. Love you too- bye…”

Hanging up, Taylor leant back into the headboard and breathed out. This wouldn’t be easy, but she had everything she needed… and her friends needed her in return. She wiped away those last tears as the door creaked open and Estela peeked in cautiously. Taylor scooched to the edge of the bed, drawn forward as if by a magnet and got to her feet.

“Hey, gorgeous,” she winked as she took a step forward, and her heart melted at the tenderness she saw in Estela’s eyes. She needed to be closer to her.

“…Hey. Did… that help? I can give some more space if you need it. I get it. This is… this is stuff you’ve never really had to confront before. Not really.”

“It really helped, yeah. But there’s, uh, actually something else that’s been bothering me.”

Estela faltered, lines of worry returning to her face in an instant. God, she couldn’t stand it when Taylor was hurting… she’d take her every burden and carry it herself if she could. “Oh? Anything I can help you with?”

“Actually, yes. This bed of yours… isn’t it about time we tested it out properly?”

“Oh…”

And then the worry was gone. Estela’s features shifted into a lustful and expectant smile. Could Taylor know just how much she yearned to hold her? Without tearing her gaze from her lover’s eyes, which were bright with desire, she pushed the door closed and nudged in a wooden wedge with the side of her foot. It was better they were not disturbed.

Taylor flicked her tongue out over her lips, responding to the heat that flared out to her from that look. That look that made her legs weak. They hadn’t done this, not properly, since she’d given Vaanu their essence back. She’d been frail, tiring at the slightest exertion, and Estela nervous of causing her harm. Backing towards the single bed, she beckoned her lover in with an enticing curl of the finger and unbuttoned her shirt, just enough so she could slide it down to reveal her shoulders. The sharp exhale that reached her ears made Taylor smirk. “So, you’re interested?” she taunted.

Estela surged forward and captured Taylor’s mouth in a messy kiss, shutting her up. They fell back into the mattress together, all in a tangle within seconds. Taylor grasped a handful of dark hair, anchoring herself in as her lips crashed against Estela’s hungrily.

“Oh god- ohgod, Taylor…”

“Shhh… just kiss me…”

A teasing smile came to Estela’s face. “You promise you won’t fall asleep on me again, mi amor?”

Taylor gasped dramatically and slapped her on the butt before redoubling her efforts, tongue lapping wantonly at her love’s sweet-tasting mouth. Estela was grinding hard against her thigh and even as they’d barely begun, soft moans vibrated against her lips. Taylor came up for breath, panting.

“Too rough?” Estela stopped in her tracks, concern showing in her eyes. She stroked an errant lock of hair from Taylor’s face.

“Maybe a little?” Taylor met Estela’s hand, and took it to her lips for a gentle peck. “Here- “ she tugged at her wife’s pants, “what I’m really thinking is that there are way too many clothes getting between us right now. May I?”

Kicking the last pieces of clothing into a haphazard pile on the floor, Estela pulled Taylor back into her arms and guided her gently down, never losing eye contact. “Is this better?” She kissed slowly, smiling against Taylor’s lips as she felt her melt into the tender caress.

Taylor could only respond by whimpering blissfully into the kiss, her heart racing, eyelids fluttering. A trail of goosepimples followed the stroke of Estela’s fingertips over her thigh and inwards. Oh, how she loved her… she could just shout it from the rooftops… but the words escaped her. She could only grasp, and feel, and kiss… her blissful moans joining her love’s in an ecstatic duet.

Afterwards, they lay together, legs entwined. Estela kept on stroking the backs of her fingers over Taylor’s cheek, leaving delicate kisses in their wake and smiling helplessly. This was truly heaven on earth.

“I just can’t stop kissing you…”

“I don’t mind.” Taylor exhaled in contentment and nuzzled close to Estela’s face, wishing she could just breathe in the very essence of her. She hummed throatily. “…my starlight…”

The love that hung off every sound made Estela giddy. She kissed a tender trail down from Taylor’s ear, tracing her jawline, feeling her relax totally in the embrace, breaths becoming slow, deep, peaceful, teetering on the edge of slumber. Estela let her eyes flutter closed, her lips resting at the base of her wife’s neck. Her words were a whisper against Taylor’s soft skin. “… I love you…”

Her fingers guided Taylor’s to her chest, where the Andromeda sigil had been inked permanently over her heart. This was where Taylor’s roots were, tethering her to what mattered, her mark left indelibly. If only she could realise it.

“…see…you are my heart…”

Taylor’s fingertips traced the symbol on her wife’s body with a featherlight touch, and she felt a lump come to her throat. In all ways that mattered, she was ingrained into the lives of her loved ones, as they were in herself. She took Estela’s hand, bringing it to her own chest and smiled as Estela’s eyes opened a crack, gazing upon the Draco sigil there before kissing Taylor’s neck once more.

“… And you are mine. My heart… my home… my family. Always and forever.”

#estela montoya #nicolas montoya #jake mckenzie #estela x mc #endless summer #diego soto

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jjpmoans · 5 years

Text

50 Questions Tag

Tagged by @prettywordsyouleft and @itsallabigmess bcs these two unnies really love me

1. What takes too much of your time?

Social media (yes that includes tumblr)

2. What makes your day better?

These days, Jinyoung. Lol okay so I am a very talkative one. So yeah, talking to someone will immediately makes me feel less stressful.

3. What’s the best thing that happened to you today?

Just now @itsallabigmess made an exception for me to write a GOT7 fic asdfghjkl I FEEL A LITTLE TOO OVER HAPPY

4. What fictional place would you like to go to?

I think almost all my friend would have guess this. Hogwarts. Because the food there seems to be endless and really, I’d love to try eating both drumsticks in my hand and I want to put an incantation to whoever tries to hold me from eating.

5. Are you good at giving advice?

Well, I think I am. Judging from how my whole family turned to me when they wanted to share their problems. Also when I gave advises, I always stresses this one thing “Listen to understand, don’t listen to reply” and that implies to me too. And honestly, I listen too much and sometimes when people just don’t want to change, I feel really annoyed BECAUSE WHAT IS THE POINT YOU WANTED MY ADVISE???? Okay I think I’m good. hahahhahhaha

6. Do you have any mental illness?

Horny 24/7 is that a mental illness? lmao no I’m not that bad but I think I need to get married. NOW.

7. Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis?

Not yet. In my country, people describe sleep paralysis as you got crushed by some spirit (ghost to be exact) and yes it is scary and I hope I would never experience it.

8. What musician inspired you the most?

I’ve been thinking a lot and though I really want to say GOT7, I’d say EXO. Partly because I was there since early times, but also, the amount of success and loyalties they have received are really unbelievable. The secret of EXO’s and BTS’s popularity which leads them to win daesang in every award is their fans. And I really hope ahgase can be like them. I’d be lying if I say our fandom is really hardworking when it comes to award season. I’ve seen my friend bullshitting EXO and BTS bcs whenever any of them is nominated in the same award of GOT7, automatically, GOT7 will lose. And no joke, army and exol are really monsters during award season. And I hope us ahgase can be like that too. I know got7 said they didn’t mind but Jinyoung once said that he want to know how those groups can win daesang easily and he thought got7 need to work harder. smh I’m emo. sorry this got longer than it should.

9. Have you ever fallen in love?

I do. Hahahahhahaha yes I do.

10. What’s your dream date?

Well for me, just talking with each other is a date. I love to know small details because when I love someone, I just want to know everything about him. But okay a dream date? Amusement park. Yes you need to know which ride makes me scream like a girl and which makes me scream like a mad woman.

11. What do others notice about you?

I’m very talkative (that really shows lol). And I don’t know how to refuse when someone ask for a help or anything. I always tell myself to treat people the way I want to be treated.

And they said I’m too nice. Yeah I figured that too hahahahhaa

12. What is an annoying habit you have?

Refuse to listen when I’m angry. I feel annoyed because I know I’m wrong but I’m angry but I don’t want to hurt people. So I’ll say “Sorry, I’m very angry now but I know I’m wrong. Just, I’ll be okay later so we’ll talk later”

13. Do you still talk to your first love?

Yes and no. Our last conversation was he wanted to meet me. But ever since then, no other conversation.

14. How many ex’s do you have?

Can’t relate lol

15. How many songs are in your playlist?

Here’s the thing. I have a lot of playlists. Phone playlist, laptop playlist, joox playlist and youtube playlist. So I don’t know how many of them.

16. What instruments can you play?

Non existent.

17. Who do you have the most pictures of?

My phone? Now? Jinyoung smh this is all Tumblr’s fault lol.

18. Where would you like to go before you die?

Mecca. I’d like to die there if I can.

19. What is your zodiac?

Virgo. And please, someone, please help me calculate whatever thing it was (sun sign, moon sign and all) I never knew those things and it irks me when I don’t know it hahahahhaaa

20. Do you relate to it?

Well I did some research here, Virgo firstly is a virgin and yes I am. It says that virgo is very supportive of people in their lives and even strangers, that is me. I’m a critical thinker bcs I personally hate when something goes wrong. but lol hardworking, artists and remembers everything? Not even close. I’m a lazy ass, I draw a cow but it turned into a pig and I am hopeless with my memory.

But one Virgo thing about me, yes I am an overthinker hahahahhaa

21. What is happiness to you?

When my family reunited.

22. Are you going through anything right now?

Family problem. Mom just got heart attack, dad married another woman, brother on crisis with mom, sister just stabbed my back, aunt made everything worse. It’s been three months into 2019, every week, another family problem popped up. But we are trying, I tried to fix everything, another role which the smallest child has to take upon responsibility but I’m fine. Just, tiring.

23. What’s the worst decision you’ve ever made?

applied for the wrong scholarship and wasted an opportunity to fly to New Zealand for study.

24. What’s your favourite store?

Food stores. Any of them. ARE MY FAVOURITE ahhahahhaha

25. What’s your opinion on abortion?

Because I’m a muslim, I am against abortion. Here, in my country, abortion is done because it was done out of wedlock and they feel embarrassed. So, it irks me bcs if you can think to have sex, you can’t think that there is possibilities that you can get pregnant? And to kill your child bcs you wanted to cover it, is unacceptable. But again, it is personal choice.

26. Do you keep a bucket list?

I have a few but not enough to be a bucket.

27. Do you have a favourite album?

Honestly, if favourite means I have listened to all songs in that album, it’s EXO The War album.

28. What do you want for your birthday?

A freaking big plushie. I love to hug big plushies. But no one ever wanted to give me that for my birthday. And now, I’ve been searching for a big squirtle plushie or snorlax plushie (yes jackson and jaebum)

29. What are most people’s first impression of you?

okay this one lol they said I look scary and they thought I’d be the grumpy one. Well, if you meet me when I’m hungry, I have the tendency to be one.

30. What age do you seem according to most people?

I don’t know anymore. An aunt asked me “Are you the one who got married?” when it was my sister smh

31. Where do you keep your phone while you’re sleeping?

next to my pillow bcs I need to charge it.

32. what word do you say the most?

me? I say “shit” a lot lol

33. What’s the oldest age you would date?

well I would say I definitely date anyone as long as they are not the same age with my dad.

34. What’s the youngest age you would date?

idk I never thought on dating a younger one. But if I do, maybe 4 years younger bcs damn, if I make it 10 years, my date would be 12 when me here is 22.

35. What job/career do most people say would suit you?

something which requires me to talk a lot.

36. What’s your favourite music genre?

K-Pop.

37. If you could live in any country in the world, where would it be?

South Korea. New Zealand. Anywhere but Malaysia lol.

38. What is your current favourite song?

Say you won’t let go - James Arthur

39. How long have you had this blog for?

I had this blog for a few years. But just becoming active just recently hmm I don’t know the exact date. But I know it started after I interacted with @prettywordsyouleft

40. What are you excited for?

Food. and sponsored vacation

41. Are you a better talker or listener?

A better talker. but also a pretty good listener

42. What is the last productive thing you did?

Last sunday, i climbed a 200m hill to get to the view point. It got me panting like a dying cow.

43. What do you want for Christmas?

While I don’t celebrate Christmas, I welcome gifts. Any gifts would be fine lol (make sure its food)

44. What class do you get the best grades in?

High school? Chemistry. College? Mathematic. Now? Nothing hahahahaha

45. On a scale of 1-10, how are you feeling right now?

5 and exhausted but tomorrow? 10 BECAUSE A JINYOUNG IS COMING

46. What can you see yourself doing in 10 years?

10 years I just hope that I am already working and saving money to go on vacations and can sponsor my family on vacations too.

47. When did you first get your heartbreak?

2009 when I discovered that dad has another wife. I was 12 and just got my exam result but dad wasn’t there. He was never present for any of my achievements in school. Turns out he has another child the same age as me and he puts her before me. Since I was born, I was always put second.

2011 when I liked a guy but he hated me awh teenagers. He said I’m too fat and how dare a fat girl like me tries to like him? He was my first love.

48. At what age do you want to get married?

When I am ready. I have a dream wedding, so I would work hard for it to happen.

49. What career did you want to have as a child?

Idk I always change it lol today i’ll say teacher and next day I’ll say ballerina. Yes I spent my whole school life giving different careers when teachers asked me.

50. What do you crave right now?

Food bcs I’m on diet and hell those food porns are getting on my nerves.

Phew it was a good time answering all these questions and it drains my energy lol. So for this, hmm I don’t know who to tag. But i’ll go with this one @sevenpeaches @riceeater22 @tuanyiems @kpopchangedme @kpopstories @starhibiki @ongsung @sehunsmybae (yes I always saw you) and everyone who want to do this! of course, you are not forced to do this

#jinyoungmoans join tagging game

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