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fdd700 · 4 years

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Part 2/2

Part 1 ( @shamelesspoetry )

Paring: Dukexiety, side Moceit and Loginice Words: 3288 Genre: angst, fluff, hints at smut (you have to squint), angst with a happy ending

Virgil had lost all concept of time. Had it been days? Minutes? Hours? He didn’t know or care. He could only note that the banging on the door had stopped. There had been banging (that faded into knocking) on his door for a while at the start. Logan, confused on whether he had done something wrong, Patton, desperate to try and talk to the anxious side, and Roman, who wanted to understand the outburst. The locked door prevented all of them from entering his space (pity party). The dark cloud of anxiety now seems to spread among the room, swallowing his posters and books. He couldn’t seem to care. He’s passed the sad stage and seemed to move on to the numbness. The sad would come back, it always did.

Meanwhile, in his shared room, Roman was pacing the floor.

“C’mon prince of boring, why are you pacing? It’s giving me head trauma.”

“A headache. That’s called a headache,” Roman said, staring at his twin who shrugged his shoulders.

“What has you so worked up? Oo ~ do you need help with a project, I wouldn’t mind adding a few corpses!”

“No, Remus, be serious, I’m worried about Virgil!”

“The emo?” He asked before shrugging. “He’s just sulking over Logan taking the last cup of coffee or something.” Roman wasn’t convinced. “Come on, Roro, you’re just upset because you have a crush on him.”

“What? No, I don’t,” Roman said, staring at his brother in confusion. Remus only wiggled his eyebrows.

“You wanna see that flat ass all day. Wanna wipe those racoon eyes, wanna-”

“No, seriously, I don’t.” Remus only blinked at his brother before shrugging.

“His loss.” Roman continued to stare at his brother.

“Remus, did you... did you think I liked Virgil?”

“Well, I figured you’d be into pale emos.” Remus shrugged.

“Remus, I told you I like Logan, right?” Remus tilted his head.

“Maybe you did, I don’t remember.” He then grinned “See, I was right, you are into pale emos.”

“Don’t-” Roman was slowly going red.

“What? I’m not wrong. He is quite pale.” Roman raised an eyebrow at his brother.

“How would you know?” Remus seemed frozen for a moment, his brain catching up with the conversation. “Also, where were you last night? And the night before?” Remus didn’t look up at his brother.

“I was helping Thomas.” Roman, unsure of where Remus was heading, decided to proceed with caution.

“How?” Remus finally looked up, meeting his brothers’ eyes.

“Well, they are both so stressed all the time so I wanted to help... relax them. And since I’m more 50 Shades of Grey to your My Little Pony, and also the only one with the balls to actually do something-”

“Remus, what did you do?” Roman’s heart was beating. “Who are ‘they’ and how did you help them relax?” Remus went quiet for a moment, as if thinking.

“Sex.” Roman looked at his brother and could tell by the look on his face that Remus was leaving something out.

“With who?”

“Virgil...” Roman nodded slightly. “And...” ‘Who?’ Roman wanted to ask but his mind connected the pieces together. Janus and Patton were already together and that left only two people, Virgil and...

Roman gasped, tears welling in his eyes.

“Logan?” His voice was low and Roman didn’t even look at Remus for a response.

“Well, it wasn’t like I forced myself on him, he went with it willingly-”

“Shut up!” Roman’s voice was thick. “For once in your existence, shut up.” Roman shoulders shook. “How... how could you?”

“I didn’t know!”

“Bullshit!”

“Oi, don’t get all high and mighty. You only accepted me because of your spat with Janus, which wasn’t that long ago!” Remus was angry, but only at the accusation that he would deliberately hurt his twin. Roman didn’t look up to meet his brother’s gaze.

“That’s why he was so upset...” Roman whispered. Remus let the confusion wash over his face.

“What has that-”

“He loves you, you idiot! How can you not see it? He always has!” Remus blinked at his brother. “And you just fucked and left?!” Roman looked at his twin, wiping his tears. “And that’s what Logan most have told him, no wonder he’s upset!” Before Remus could respond, the door swung open, with Patton and Logan bursting in.

“We heard yelling,” Patton said. Logan noticed Roman crying first, but the other side didn’t look at him.

“Roman-” Roman pushed past them all, speed walking out of the room.

Virgil was laying on his bed when he heard the tell-tale signs of someone trying to pick his lock. He didn’t try and stop it, figuring it was Patton attempted to pull him out of spiral. He was surprised to find Roman’s tear stained face staring back at him.

“He... he just slept with him...” Roman said, voice thick. Virgil let out a weak, almost maniacal, laugh.

“Wanted us to ‘relax’. Bullshit. All men are trash.” Virgil said, his voice weak from lack of using it.

“Can I join the pity party?” Virgil looked confused for a second before he remembered all the times, he caught Roman’s star-filled gaze fixed on the logical side. He nodded, opening his arms. Roman sunk down onto the bed and the two sides just cried, not caring that people could hear them, not caring about the door still being open. Just not caring at all.

It was a few hours later, when Virgil woke up to Patton’s soft voice.

“Virge? I have something for you to eat. Roman has gone back to my room.” Virgil struggled to open his eye, but otherwise remained unmoving. “I’m just going to leave it -”

“Stay,” Virgil croaked. “please.” He choked, tears falling down his face.

“Hey, Virgil, can I touch you?” The other side nodded. “Do you want a hug?” Another nod. “Can I climb in beside you?” At Virgil’s nod, Patton lay down on the bed, opening his arms and letting Virgil come to him. Virgil crawled over to him. “Do you wanna talk about it?” There was silence in the room.

“I got my hopes up,” Virgil said. “And the one person I used to talk to about this I’m not talking to anymore and I think he hates me because I was awful to him because I was desperate to be liked!” Virgil said, sobbing. Patton shushed him gently.

“Hey, I’m sure you will get a chance to apologise,” Patton said. There was a creak at the door and Patton looked up, finding Janus giving him a sympathetic smile.

“It’s okay, Pat, I’ll take it from here.” Patton looked down at the sobbing boy and took a deep breath, slowly untangling him, giving the boy a kiss on his hair before moving to leave. Janus took his arm gently as he walked past, rubbing his cheek, kissing him softly. “I’ll take care of him.” Patton nodded, smiling. Janus looked down at the anxious side, who’s eyes were wide and fearful. He opened his mouth but didn’t get a word in before Virgil launched in rambling.

“I’m so sorry for everything I said and did! I wanted so badly not to be hated anymore and I was afraid that if I didn’t hate you than they would hate me again but I should-” Virgil slapped his hand over his own mouth, looking up and Janus, who’s eyebrows were furrowed in worry.

“Virgil. I need to you to breath for me.” Virgil dropped his hand before he took a deep breath in. “Good, okay, I’ll count to eight. 8,7, 6-” Virgil let out his breath. “That’s okay, we’ll start again. 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Good. okay, hold for four. 1, 2, -” Virgil dropped off again, clutching his chest. “Okay, it’s okay, we can start again as many times as you need. Okay?” Virgil nodded, closing his eyes and taking Janus’ hands. “Okay, in for eight. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8. Okay, hold for four. 1, 2, 3, 4. Great, so good, out for seven. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7. Great, let’s do that a few more times.” Janus took him through his breath exercise and the room slowly became lighter and lighter. His posters reappearing, his eyeshadow receding. “That was really good.” Virgil nodded.

“I’m sorry.”

“I know why you did what you did, Virgil. That’s not me saying that I’m not mad or I wasn’t upset about it, but I get it. I did the same thing to Remus, so I know how you feel,” Janus said, noticed Virgil’s gaze dropping from holding Janus’ to his lap at the mention of the creative side. “This is about him, isn’t it?” Virgil nodded. Janus opened his arms and Virgil crawled in and melted against the other side. “He’s always been an idiot.”

“But I thought... He came here, maybe three nights ago. I was... I was confused because he didn’t normal come here. He said I was stressed out and everyone was worried for me... He started kissing me and then more than just kissing and-”

“He forced himself on you?” Janus asked, gasping. Virgil shook his head quickly, looking into the other eyes that he wasn’t lying.

“I wanted it. I thought... it’s stupid, but I thought that meant he maybe he liked me back.” Janus nodded sympathetically. “I know he has troubling expressing emotions and he tends to channel that into... sexual advances. I just thought...” Virgil deflated. “I just thought maybe he liked me back.” Janus pulled him in again.

“I meant what I said. Those twins don’t have a clue between them.”

“I feel bad for Roman. I thought everyone knew about his crush on Logan, except Logan himself. And... him too now, I guess.” Virgil wiped his eye with his hoodie, sighing. “I feel like an idiot.”

“Well, love makes you an idiot. Look at me and Patton. It took us how long to figure out that our enemies to lovers’ trope had turned into the ‘lovers’ end of the spectrum?” Virgil giggled. “Love and feelings are complicated. Maybe you should explain all this to him?” Virgil shrugged.

“I’m afraid. I don’t want to be rejected.”

“Rejection is the precursor to closure. It’s very hard to have one without the other.” Virgil sighed.

“That’s about the dumbest thing you’ve ever said.”

“Okay, Mr pessimism, prove me wrong.” Virgil put his hands up, sniffling.

“You’re right.” Janus handed him his yellow handkerchief. “Thank you.” Janus nodded. “I mean it. What I said. I’m sorry.” Janus gave him a small smile.

“I know. I meant what I said too. About understanding why did and said those things. I was upset but I’m getting over it. Your apology helps.” Janus grabbed a set of wipes before cleaning Virgil’s face. “C’mon, let’s eat. We can relieve Patton who is probably stress cooking.” The door opened on cue and Patton meekly stepped inside, holding more plates.

“I made spaghetti.” Janus smiled, a loving look on his face as he beckoned the side over. Virgil would’ve fake gagged but he couldn’t bring himself to ruin this moment. He was too drained. “Get this into you, then go to sleep. Maybe everything will be clearer in the morning.” Virgil somewhat doubted it, but took the side’s word for it anyway. “Everything is gonna be okay.”

In the hallway, Roman took a deep breath before knocking on the door.

“Yes,” The side answered and Roman opened the door. “Ah, Roman. You were in to see Virgil, how is he doing?”

“He’s fine, Logan. He’s not why I’m here though.”

“If this is about your brother and I, I have been made aware it made you uncomfortable. While I’m not sure why, I do apologise. There is nothing between us.”

“You don’t need to apologise. My reaction was my own fault,” Roman said. Logan looked and him confused and opened his mouth, but closed it when he saw Roman shake his head. “I know you and I have our differences but I really do value you as a friend and side and that’s why I was so scared to come and tell you, but I’ve realised I can’t just use that excuse and then get mad when things don’t work out my way.” Logan still looked puzzles so Roman sighed slightly before locking eyes with the logical side. “I like you, Logan. I have for a while. And I never told you because I was too scared and I just didn’t know what I’d do if you said yes. But I’ve realised I can’t just hold all my feelings in until I combust.” There was silence. “It’s okay if you don’t like me back-”

“No, it’s not that,” Logan said. “I don’t... I don’t really understand love. Sexual desire is different but love confuses me. But Roman I-” he trailed off, ruffling his hair. “I feel something for you. I don’t know what it is but it’s strong and I’ve only recently noticed it.” Roman slowly approached Logan, holding out his hands, silently offering to meet Logan halfway if he needs it. Logan grasped his hands. “Could you live with that? With me possibly never being able to love you back.”

“It could be hard, yeah, but I want to try. I care about you Logan, so I want to be with you, however you feel comfortable.” He pulled Logan up, before standing so close to him. “How about touch?” Logan nodded. “Words please, Lo.”

“I like touch.” Roman wound his arms around the logical side’s waist. Logan frowned slightly. “I don’t know what makes you think you’ll be in charge.” Roman’s face heated up, covering his ears and neck.

“I was just tryna hold you,” he whined and Logan half smirked, half smiled. He leaned down, kissing the fanciful side’s red neck.

“It’s okay, I’m just teasing.” Roman nodded before the logical side moved back up and the two made eye contact. “Can I kiss you?”

“If you don’t, I might hit you.”

“Feisty, I like it.” Roman blushed but before he could say anything, Logan gently placed their lips together and he melted into the logical side’s hold. Things weren’t perfect, but they would be okay. And when the pair woke up the next morning, arms wound around each other, they realised that they would rather be nowhere else but right here, in this moment, together.

Virgil, who woke up squished between Janus and Patton, managed to climb out without waking either of them up. He moved over to his door and, taking a deep breath, opened it. He was surprised to find Remus mid knock. Part of him wanted to close the door and go back to bed but Patton’s words replayed in his mind.

‘Maybe everything will be clearer in the morning.’

“Can we talk?” Virgil nodded and let himself be dragged to the sitting room. He sat down on the couch and let the silence sit for a few minutes. “Why didn’t you just tell me you like me?” Virgil would’ve been shocked but he also half heard Roman and Remus’ argument. Plus, the other side isn’t completely stupid.

“I was afraid I’d be rejected.” Remus was pacing. Virgil couldn’t understand the nervousness until he realised that he was causing it. “Remus, maybe you should sit down-”

“No!” Remus shouted back. Virgil flinched at the sudden loud noise before Remus dropped down into the chair beside him. “I don’t know how all these lovey dovey words work, that’s Roman’s job, but I like you too! Why didn’t you just tell me? I would never have slept with Logan but it seemed like you truly only wanted to relax, you didn’t even cuddle me so I thought-”

“You like me too?” Remus blinked at the other side.

“I went to you first. I wanted to confess then but I just didn’t want to be rejected. I like you like wasps like Satan.” Virgil choked back a laugh as tears streamed down his face. “What did I say? Why are you crying?” Remus asked, panicking. Virgil shook his head, taking the sides flailing hands.

“It’s okay. They’re happy tears,” Virgil said. Remus still looked worried so Virgil wiped them away. Remus’ hand glided up his arm and neck, hesitating before his cheek, just centimetres away from the skin. Virgil, deciding to be brave, placed his face into Remus’ palm. Remus’ eyes widened before a smile spread across his cheeks. There was no glint, just love in his eyes and Virgil felt the best kind of overwhelmed. Remus’ began to vibrate with excitement before letting out a screech, picking Virgil up and swinging him around. Virgil wrapped his leg around the other’s waist and clutched on for dear life, half screaming himself.

“This is better than juicy butt holes! This is better than late night thoughts!” Virgil laughed at him, leaning down to touch their foreheads together. Remus, still pumped with adrenaline, placed the other down on the couch before attacking him with kisses and tickles. The happy tears return as Virgil gasped for air, smiling so wide his cheeks hurt.

“Get a room.” Roman teasing voice came. Remus stuck his tongue out before burying his face in Virgil’s neck. The anxious side saw him and Logan’s clasped hands and winked to the two. “If the rest of us have the decency to go to our own rooms, so do you.” Logan nodded. “Plus, I know you’re lanky but you do not get to take up the entire couch. Move over!” The two complied, Virgil going to sit up before Remus pulled him onto his lap, nuzzling his face into the other’s neck gain, leaving soft kisses.

“Oh, we are all up!” Patton said. His eyes landed on the two new couples and they softened. Janus rolled his eyes and his husband’s soft gaze but Virgil saw the same look in his snake eyes. “Janjan, can you help me make breakfast?” Patton asked, entering the kitchen. Janus, as if sensing the change in atmosphere, moved his gaze to the four remained sides.

“Not a word.” He said. “I mean it.” The other sides nodded, holding back laughs. He left to go help Patton and the room erupted in laughter.

“Guess Janus isn’t as tough as he lets on.”

Later, that night to be exact, when Remus had Virgil curled up on his chest, half asleep, he just let himself be so thankful he didn’t fuck this up. Virgil, as if sensing the others thoughts, sat up, looking into the creative side’s eyes, smiled.

“You’re stuck with me now.” Remus smirked, pulling the other down for a kiss, hands roaming his bodies. Breaking away, Remus mumbled again his lips;

“You make it sound so difficult.” He kissed him again before pulling back a minute later. “This has been one of my best decisions in my entire existence.” Virgil smiled, his eyes brimming with love. He curled Remus’ hair around his fingers.

“You’re not too bad yourself, shrimpy.”

“Excuse me, I am a kraken!”

“Okay, shrimpy.” Remus smirked.

“ooh, feeling feisty, are we? Guess we’ll have to fix that.” Remus’ hands dug into the other side’s torso, causing his to shriek with laughter. Remus rolled them over, getting the upper hand and attacking Virgil’ tickle spots.

“Mercy! Have mercy!” Virgil said between pants and laughs and Remus finally let up. Virgil panted, a wide stupid grin taking over his features. “You play dirty, octopus.” Remus laughed before shrugging.

“Close enough!” He declared before diving down to kiss his boyfriend endlessly. Virgil couldn’t help but think that Patton was right.

Everything was gonna be okay.

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