#literally the only tags saved here are a few verses i keep adding them and it's a never ending circle of misery gjhj
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THIS BLOG IS NOW AN ARCHIVE !! - you can find me @rescuefield new and improved ( hopefully otherwise i'll pick a fight with tunglr )
#literally the only tags saved here are a few verses i keep adding them and it's a never ending circle of misery gjhj#no promo for now as i'd prefer to have people follow me bc they want to write you know 😭 but we shall see
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Kerillian, Vermintide 2. (Handmaiden)
1. Warhammer Fandom is welcome with open arms... but be chill. I don’t tolerate toxicity here and the fandom at least in 40k has a metric ton of annoying neckbeards. It’s a parody that’s so dark that you’re not supposed to take it seriously, you’re supposed to be as over the top and edgy as possible for at least 40k. That or be something like the Orks.
2. Warhammer is dark and then 40k is extremely dark to the point it’s a literal intended parody. And I will not rp the deep lore of Slannesh or any aspect of chaos other than maybe live consumption from Kerillian’s corruption verse. Blacklist the tags ‘elven handmaiden’ ‘shape feaster’ ‘40kay’ (I don’t want this in the main tags of 40k tumblr lmao).
3. This has two characters in one with separate verses and pathways. I thought it’d be neat since the game also gives different pathways for the professions.
4. I have a different voice for my Kerillian for a more elegant elven fighter and for the 40k verse/corruption verse for both. As the distortion combined with a scottish accent and slang.... does not sound pleasant as I experimented with it.
5. Her voice reference is Pisha from Vampire, the Masquerade game. Or better known as Motoko Kusanagi or the ‘Major’ from the anime Ghost in the Shell. Granted Pisha is slightly different. She will still have the same sassy dialogue and some manner of speaking. But expect more of hrm, a honed feral elegance. I have no problems with the VA but I don’t recall other wood elves being scottish, it just is a bit odd for me is all? Along with the distortion I tested making it sound even stranger. I think it’s fine for the ingame and I like her personality however, just what I intend isn’t suited for it.
6. Kerillian’s eyes are pure black and that of a void, this is not normal and a blessing and curse from the goddess Lileath. She has these eyes regardless verse depending on her form, as she does get canonic visions I will say is from the future on events and such. It’s fine to insult her about them or to antagonize/accuse her of such. The only reason Saltpyre doesn’t probably is because they’re friends but also most people haven’t seen an elf at least in Warhammer.
7. If wanting a certain verse? Be sure to read EVERYTHING regarding that verse listed below as added notes. As I had to tack on a lot of things for this bios.
8. Kerillians default verse is her ‘elven handmaiden’ tag that’s a fantasy verse. For it to be sci-fi for its canon AU is 40kay added onto it or the other tag that’s ‘shape feaster’.
9. I know 40k lore better than Warhammer lore but I don’t need to know much to rp this exiled character and I can just read stuff up/plot it out if someone wants to pursue something specific.
10. Warhammer I will try to be flexible on, but it tries to be semi-more realistic in terms of power-scaling/what’s physically possible before you die. Kerillian’s powerset reflects as such, but ultimately she could be throttled by an overscaled anime character for example. Though I can adjust as her power-scaling is hero level to near but not quite demi-god for her verse.
11. I am aware that Eldar cannot become Daemon Princes, but I will be taking liberties and that Kerillian’s weakness to Slannesh. And the Chaos Gods ever evolving and changing? That it becomes a new, concerning and terrifying evolution for Slannesh to offer a new way to save themselves. But also become immortal and apart of Slannesh as a corrupted soulstone adorned to the Chaos God’s body that’s offered through a ritual. Kerillian becoming the first of many... as the Dark Eldar and a few Eldar join the ranks of Slannesh for self-preservation.
Character Reference (Uncorrupted): It is the handmaiden class, then her new voiceclaim is Pisha from Vampire, the Masquerade.
Do I want them to die: Kerillian can die, this is Warhammer or potentially 40k, no one is safe but Major Gods or the Emperor on the Throne. We can just make a new rp but keep in mind she isn’t a pushover. I do want to plot her death if it’s to happen.
Will I have/get icons: Yes I do, for corruption verse and noncorrupted.
Tag: elven handmaiden (Default Fantasy Verse) | shape feaster (Corruption Verse) | 40kay (Sci-Fi Grim Dark Parody Verse)
Age: Several Thousand Years Old most likely, doesn’t age however. For her Corruption Verse? She’s hrm, I will say it’s so far into the future she’s eons old and considered a seasoned Demon Princess/Prince.
Sex: AMAB
Gender: She would be considered trans female in human society, but is merely considered a woman in her own. Is fine with she/him and multiple terms.
Race: Wood Elf (Uncorrupted) Wood Elf Daemon Princess/Prince (Corrupted)
Sexuality: Pansexual.
Personality traits: Sassy, sarcastic. Prideful, hates humans. Hates dwarves. Hates what she considers to be not elegant. Granted, she can still befriend all that was mentioned. Caring subtly. Loyal. Can fear death at times. Likes the thrill of the hunt. A bit cold. Elegant though a touch feral. Joking. Arrogant. Observant. Intelligent. Wise, though it’s left her jaded. Can be loving once she gets close, though is more physical than with words, but her words are pretty strongly-said when she does say them. Poetic. Artistic. Playful. Selfish. Extreme Willpower. | Corruption Verse: Lustful, Degenerate. Sadistic. Masochistic. Hungry. Indulgent. Murderous.
Mental traits: Elven Perception. Her willpower extends to her mental state, this allows her to keep her free will and sentience even when corrupted. As she’s corrupted yes, but ultimately chooses still as she did prior along with having her personality. Akin to Magnus the Red but ultimately a different person rather than warped entirely.
Physical traits: as all elves in warhammer, she is around 6′3 and has black void eyes, this is notably not normal. Other than that? She just has white hair and long ears. | Corruption Verse: she is around 30 feet long and much thicker with six-arms as a Daemon Naga that is faceless, then a seamless line on her mouth that opens up to reveal her two maws of teeth and a circular hooked, long tongue. She then has the faces of all her victims revealed on the purple parts of her scales that she’s consumed for their shapes that’s ever shifting, moving and moaning in pain, pleasure and torment. She can assume her original form if she so desires, but usually only to infiltrate and corrupt. Her white hair is replaced with white snakes and she has a wingspan that can extend, grow and change in size. Her faceless visage can contort and change to that of a draconic snake-head when eating, she usually just chooses the faceless visage and perhaps wears a face when she senses the other’s desires/what’s appealing to them the most. See below for her corruption verse visual reference.
Powers: Note: Presume in the 40k Verse that any powers that involve magic or otherwise involve Psionics or Psyker Energy. I will simply be incorporating her class’s talents as it doesn’t really make sense that someone part of just four people can take on literal armies of Skaven and or Chaos Soldiers.
Kerillian Hand Maiden Powers and Training (Default Warhammer Verse): (Power Scaling Hero to bordering Demi-God but not quite as Warhammer and 40k Warhammer is more realistic in possible feats but I will be using all her talents and class abilities. Think like an Elite Hero Soldier capable of holding the line if put with other Elite Soldiers or given a small squadron)
Phase Dash: Kerillian can phase dash through enemies instantly in a rather long distance but it’s a straight line. This ability leaves her the choice of inflicting massive bleeding onto her enemies and leaving her allies untouched. Then feeding off of the pain? She can process the power into an empowered strikes that she usually utilizes to take down on armored/dangerous targets but dissipates shortly after about 15 seconds. And while she goes invisible for this time? It is not true invisibility, it merely makes her invisible to outside perception for around two seconds. She may strike during this, but it takes her out her phase dash along with blocking much earlier than normal, it can be useful situationally however. She can use this ability every twenty seconds or so.
Wraith Walk: Kerillian can temporarily go incorporeal for a second in well-timed reflexes to avoid attacks entirely, but she cannot spam this. Using this makes her acrobatics slightly faster and her reflexes as well, it can become more fervent but has limits. Her ability to dodge is also supernatural in terms of the distance she can do a still jump to the side or otherwise, along with acrobatics and balance.
Handmaiden Physical Enhancement: she is much heartier than the normal individual and can block rather easily. Her strength also allows her to carry more ammunition compared to the average person, along with being supernaturally strong. (Have you ever actually carried arrows? They’re pretty heavy). Her self-enhancements also improve when stimulated or provoked into operating under strain, such as increasing in reflexes or swiftness of her strikes, along with being able to heal off the deaths of her enemies. She is capable of fully blocking a Troll’s strike or Chaos Spawn’s strikes though she still experiences being knocked around, this is usually used in a pinch or to save an ally.
Handmaiden Healing: using her innate magical enhancements? Kerillian can also share some of her healing when healing or being healed with nearby allies. And using her innate healing factor, she can seal the wounds of her allies more when stabilizing them back to their feet. Even healing them a bit though only a little.
Relentless Fervor Aura: Kerillian bestows an aura that rapidly replenishes the energy of her allies to keep them able to keep fighting, unable to grow tired. This radius is about two-hundred feet or so.
Elite Elven Warrior Training: she is a Grand Master in martial combat, along with training, fighting style being that of a strong, deadly, but elegant elven warrior.
Elven Senses: Kerillian has exceptional elven senses such as being able to see in great detail from even one hundred paces or her reflexes and acrobatics are abnormal. It is surmised that Kerillian's eyes are pure black due to a curse, so it is fine to take note of it and even remark about it. The curse itself goes to the soul and it's a permanent one. I have it as a blessing curse more than anything by her Goddess Lileath who blesses her with visions among other things, along potential outcomes of the future... and one of them being with Slannesh and another with Lileath. Perhaps it is inevitable, yet perhaps there's a deeper need for it to which she does not understand and only Lileath does. I will be keeping this vague until or if ever info about her eyes is ever revealed, though I will tie it into the corruption verse for the sake of it.
Combat Equipment: Elven Mithril Armor crafted in honor of the Moon Goddess Lileath, along with her insignia on her Mithril Tower Shield and Mithril Spear. She uses a Longbow. Usually has a haste potion, healing drought and... usually refuses anything like a bomb or considered inelegant but she may take one if she thinks she needs it.
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40k Differences to note (I wasn’t sure what to make her to be honest, but this was the closest thing to her moveset in terms of wargear): Kerillian is an Eldar Autarch in her 40k verse and is much more brutal and merciless compared to her Warhammer version, though is still considered merciful by 40k standards. She uses a Forceshield mounted on her wrist, then a Star Glaive. For her ranged weapon? She uses a Reaper Launcher. Then for armor: heavy aspect armor and swooping hawk wings to dodge, fly and the ability to take great hits. I realize this makes her significantly stronger in this verse? But I think overall there’s nothing that translates well to Kerillian other than this.
In 40k, she still uses some of her wargear. It’s just corrupted.
For her canon 40k verse since she’s getting attention for it? I will be open to using her with Sci-Fi or more niche, odd Fantasy characters in general in a more neutral universe of the Eldar scattering from their own arrogance and perfection at being perfect beings, causing their own fatal flaw with infighting over control. So while her power scaling is compared to that of a Primarch as a strong exiled Eldar Autarch: things like Cyberpunk, Star Wars, Star Trek, Final Space, Rick and Morty are all fine to use with my Eldar AU as she can serve as a companion, leader or otherwise that can drive a lot of plots forward since she’s a lot stronger in that verse utility wise and in terms of tech and powers that’ll lean toward being a mysterious bounty hunter. (40k is a parody that goes over neckbeard’s heads to begin with so I’m not going to take it TOO seriously) She is one foot taller since she’s supposed to be tall for her race to begin with and the taller Eldar tend to be the same height as Space Marines. Below is the chosen armor for her as a faceclaim for that verse:
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Corruption Verse for Warhammer and 40k Powers and Differences: I will be making her a six-armed Naga Daemon Princess or Prince (for the 40k verse since that’s gender specific but will still stay her gender and pronouns/physical sex etc). This is based off ‘Dechala’ if instead she was a favored champion of her Dark God. Slannesh has been proven to be her most ‘hated’ god when uncorrupted and I have it that they are the most tempting for her in the Warhammer verse and also 40k is rather obvious due to that. 40k will be somewhat different as she’ll be different from most daemons due to her being built for Warhammer Fantasy Corruption rather than 40k.
Very graphic content below for horrific powers info involving live consumption:
Her powers remain relatively the same but are enhanced beyond belief to that of a demigod-minor god to match the other champions and daemons who can take on entire armies/small armies by themselves with little issue unless compromised of counter-measures. Her dash is like that of lightning strikes, her strikes deadly and brutal and made to inflict pain to its utmost extent along with pleasure. It is relatively the same powerset, but just empowered to that of a god power-set, then the added few powers below.
Her function and title: She is ‘Kerillian, the Shapesfeaster’. As she steals the shapes of other people by consuming them as a skilled, lightning fast duelist and incapacitates them to be either killed and eaten or eaten outright while alive. They are then absorbed after being brutally digested alive or merely absorbed if killed, though when alive are also are bit into by the many masks that form within her body and under her scales that moan, scream in a cacophony in pained pleasure that deafens her victims yet the vibrations of the sounds so intense that their vibrations torture the victim before they finally die, only to join along with them in that eternal, but wonderfully tormented existence. These faces disappear temporarily and have a new one take its place before being placed back by a different mask from her endless victims, as she is a funnel directly to her dark god in consuming them for their endless hunger and lust for souls.
Shapeshifting: she can flawlessly take the shape, memories and scent and even soul signature of the victims she consumes. She uses their shapes to infiltrate and plant the seeds of Slannesh in their corruption and absolute pleasures.
Infesting Corruption of Pleasures: Kerillian can corrupt other beings through sexual contact, physical contact and often plants these seeds as an Agent planted within communities to disrupt it from within. Mostly in order to bring in the endless dance, thirst and lust her Dark God demands and to bring more followers into the fold to empower them.
Call of Pleasure: all of Kerillian’s masks in her body and underneath her scales all call out at once in a deafening call to action, along with Kerillian herself in a beckoning, distorted draconic roar. Commanding all her sleeper agents she’s corrupted to her cause to act and begin the worshipping frenzy of their Dark God in a carnal rampage of lust. This causes uncorrupted weak-willed victims within a mile to become dazed and revealed to her followers as objects of Slannesh’s designs or are outright corrupted in some cases. They are dazed and stunned for around ten minutes to thirty minutes, then dazed otherwise if strong-willed. Those who survived are often deafened or even blinded depending on how close they are to Kerillian, her followers and allies meanwhile are unaffected.
Immortality: Kerillian like all daemons even if killed, may reform at another time or more quickly if ushered in back to do their master’s work.
Sexual and Sacrificial Rituals: Kerillian lacks magic other than her extreme inane enhancements bestowed upon her to be a predator to feast on Slannesh’s enemies and corrupt the ever-endless vermin of mortals as she parades herself as one of them. She can do ritual magic if need be for a specific cause as a Daemon Prince. Though it is to note that to not confuse this with her innate ability to go back to The Realm of Chaos.
Flight: Similar to Morathi, Kerillian can also fly with wings on her in a similar fashion when she extends them out, then coupled by her own levitation enhancements.
Size and Power Difference: she is 30 feet long and much thicker and bigger in this form, she is capable of going into her old form if she desires and to some extent? Kerillian's will has retained a bit of her old self, but she is without a doubt corrupted, but more or less for her own freedom and wishes, no longer binded. So while she could easily swallow someone? I will not do that unless a bad end is requested even if it's apart of her character to take the souls and faces of people. And any bad ends will be moved to the sideblog under a readmore for explicit horror and graphic reasons. She obviously dwarfs her old self literally in terms of power and size by leagues worth.
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40k Corruption Differences: (Keep in mind I have to take creative liberties here but I’ll try to fit into canon since only humans can be Daemon Princes. As there are no real Eldar Daemons from what I understand but it does not mean it’s impossible probably) Main Things to note: She is capable of Warp Travel to go across time and space as a daemon, granted only in places capable of warp travel that’s not past the great barrier. As I’m considering the Psionic Wall the Imperium has around it, then her Corruption into a Daemon Prince is a concerning and a terrifying evolution of Slannesh. Using an Eldar Soul Stone that is absorbed by Slannesh to reward those corrupted that fall to chaos with immortality and to become a Daemon Eldar Prince if proven worthy of being more useful than simply as ‘food’. She is still what she was previously for 40k verse, but receives a vision and promise from Slannesh in her great campaign to create an endless cycle of pleasure, success, dance and a graceful dance for herself and her dark god.
Motivations: Default Fantasy Verse: To survive. To possibly end her exile. To be free. To be happy. To find love. To have a good fight. To possibly have friends. 40K Verse: To conquer, but reasonably so. To pursue the interests of the Craftworlds and deal with the looming problem of chaos in the background. To perhaps... one day mend alliances should the chance ever present itself, granted, she sees it as a slim, near impossibility with the rampant doctrines and xenophobia of the Imperium of Man. To destroy the Dark Eldar. To destroy all threats to the Craftworlds. Corrupted Verse: To serve her Dark Master in the Great Game and to reach an endless, never-ending cycle of her Dark Prince’s designs, this is mostly as an eternal debt she sees for her freedom, immortality and massive power she’s earned as she maintained her free will through sheer will power, for that is what marks a true Daemon Princess/Prince. To indulge in all lustful things and passions, to create new goals and ambitions now that she has an eternity of immortality to do with as she pleases and whatever unfortunate soul befalls her faceless, hungering maw.
Backstory: follows canon, merely look for her on her wiki. Granted we can just do adventures in any fantasy setting, I don’t mind. Then the corruption verse is pretty straight-forward. Look up any Daemon Prince or Demon Princess of Slannesh and how they serve their dark god and then combine it with her own goals. I am fine to use her Elven Verse and Daemon Verse in any settings that relate to your character in question or the other or corrupting someone to her will.
Corruption Verse Daemon Form Visual Reference: granted she’s lacking the two extra arms but I suppose just imagine they’re there like the rest or simply are those. Then far larger than the human that’s draped around the tail. She wields three spears in different hands, then wrist-mounted shields that are made to be more akin to bracers.
Note: the og artist is on twitter @virlandil. These are merely heavy edits I did to the purple body. Wings, eyes, then the added snake hair. They are very talented and did an excellent job drawing this design they drew for someone. I just happened to get lucky that someone had wanted basically what I needed as a base.
Mouth and Circular Forked Tongue Reference when fully opened:
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(Mostly) Destiel Fic Recs #5
This is a LONG recs post because it’s been a while since I did an update and I fell hard into reading one author’s work (DeanRH). In fact I could easily do a rec post just of their fics alone, but for this round I’m just going to pick out a handful of my absolute favorites so far, the ones I’d recommend to start out with, along with more other authors’ works I’ve especially enjoyed lately.
Absolution at the Five-and-Dime by DeanRH (125k) - this is perhaps THEE DeanRH fic to start with if you want a good, long read with a little bit of everything (Roadtrips! Intriguing casefic! Americana! Tasty Dean/Cas pining! Wing!kink and unique angel lore! Kinky soul fisting and tentacles!) It’s kind of two of parallel stories in one: the first, a flashback to Dean and Sam's first year hunting on their own (as well as trying to avoid hunting, and John in general); the second on how Dean and Cas finally get together during an unusual case and when Dean is able to really let go of his past trauma and accept himself/accept love from Cas.
What I love about DeanRH’s work is that they write from the unique point of view of a drifter, so they understand living on the road, traveling place to place, and the highs and lows of that life like no others I’ve encountered in SPN before. (The author’s notes are often as much fun to read as the stories themselves). They also write a kickass angel!Cas and never lose sight of his non-human traits and background. Their writing style is unique - almost poetic in nature, and I know some readers have found it difficult to get into. But it works really well for me in their SPN fic...gives it the flavor of oral story telling as might actually happen at a drifter’s camp (with one story written exactly as such). Be warned this particular fic does play up the idea of John Winchester being mentally abusive and Dean having to turn tricks when he was younger in order to support him and Sam, so there is some dark stuff. But as someone who grew up with mentally abusive parent, reading this was extremely cathartic to me and believably written (unlike some stories that go too over the top with abusive John, or just don't understand how that kind of abuse leaves lifetime psychological scars.)
The rest of this round’s recs below the cut.
Carnevale by DeanRH (18k) - Actually the first fic by this author I read, because I just couldn’t resist a story set in my favorite place in the world, Venice, Italy. Castiel is the Angel of Venice, banished there for so long he does not even know or remember the reasons why. But Carnevale season is the one time a year he can let his wings out - figuratively and literally. And during this particular Carnevale season, he meets an intriguing masked young American tourist there with his brother and their one night stand turns into something far more powerful than either expected. This one’s hot, romantic, and achingly sad at the end as it all ties together unexpectedly with canon-verse...though with a hint for the future so it’s definitely not totally sad. I loved how DeanRH clearly understands Venice as a fellow lover of the city, the side of it most tourists never see unless they spend a long time there. This story made me cry just from wanting to be back in Venice again.
Ice cream was sweeter, food more satisfying, everything was an epicurean delight. There was just something magical about Venice, and he had lived here in the city for hundreds of years, so the shine should have worn off by now.
But it didn't, and there was always something more, something wonderful to discover around the next corner. The painted eaves of a church. The beauty of two women dancing with flowers in their teeth across the Piazza San Marco one day, overcome by the sheer joy of just being there. The way the university students still created Venetian masks, like Castiel's extravagant volto mask and Dean's humble servetta muta, with crafts that had been handed down across the generations. The morning silence that lay against the stones.
Hard Landing by DeanRH (26.9k) - A bit similar in theme to Carnevale. A pre-series Dean and Sam are sight-seeing in Spain when an angel, struck by a babel-spell, crash lands right in front of Dean. A strange yet seriously hot encounter with the angel turns into something much more complicated when the brothers return home and realize something more serious is afoot and they are both trapped in the middle of it. This is another story where things are very much not as they seem at first (as fun as that is!) It features master strategist Cas at his best, with a side helping of delightful trickery care of Gabriel and Balthazar as they deal with Lucifer, Michael...and a few others along the way.
The Sacred Band of Thebes by DeanRH (14.5k) - The last DeanRH fic I’m gonna allow myself to include in this round up, because it’s just very soft and sweet and beautiful - for a story about Dean & Cas being magically transported back in time to ancient Sparta! This is another story infused with a great knowledge of place and history, with some wonderfully delightful original characters added in that make it all the more enjoyable to read.
And now on to some other authors, I promise!
IPAMIS OL OLPRIT by emmbrancsxx0 (56k). A really wonderful fic that take a different look at what might have happened with a temporarily resurrected John Winchester during Season 14. Dean & Cas are in an established relationship here, and John here isn’t too happy about it — though mostly because he sees Cas (and Jack) as monsters, the kind of monsters he spent his lifetime hunting. This is a great fic for the emotional complexity of how John, Dean and Cas are all handled. John isn’t a cardboard evil dad, Dean is struggling between his loyalty to his father and to Cas, and Cas is increasingly bitchy/frustrated at Dean still being so desperate for his father’s approval (and all the more complex for not just being a quietly suffering perfect supporting boyfriend.) There’s some great action sequences in this too along with the emotional angst and a delicious dose of hurt!Cas if that’s your thing (as it is for me :D)
Abrenuntio by Neonbat (51k). A very dark but compelling AU take on the/a apocalypse universe. Dean, Sam and John are all alive in this post-angel war-apocalyptic world. They are part of a group of human survivors fighting against the angel army when they manage to capture “Blue” — a particularly feared angel of death. Dean is tasked with bringing Blue in for interrogation and he becomes a prisoner in their camp after John is killed. As mentioned, this is a pretty dark/sad fic (with some rather gruesome torture scenes) but I still found it quite compelling as a look at how things could have gone in some other parallel universe. And somehow the author manages to make the Dean/Cas relationship come together despite them starting out as complete enemies. This is one of those AUs that works for me because the core of the characters really shine through despite the differences in the setting.
if it all fell to pieces tomorrow by spocklee (37k) - a gorgeous post-Empty rescue fic that takes an approach I haven’t really seen explored in detail before (despite being something I’ve actually thought about as something that could’ve happened.) What if Cas has spent so long denying himself happiness, and then trapped in regrets and false-rescue scenarios created by the Empty, that he can’t trust that his rescue is real? And so he runs off to be on his own - literally stealing the Impala because he can’t handle being in Dean’s presence one moment longer - and only slowly comes to terms with the idea that it’s over now and he can be happy with/around his friends and family. This one’s both deliciously angsty and at times funny/sweet, looking at Cas’s relationships not just with Dean but with Sam, Jack, Claire, even Eileen. It does some fun stuff with other returned angels and demons who now find themselves back on Earth (and human), and...I just really enjoyed this one a lot.
Both Saved and Lost by angelfishofthelord (13.7k) Gen Cas character study, absolutely gorgeous and sad and one of those fic I couldn’t stop thinking about the day after reading it. AU where Apocaverse!Cas isn’t immediately killed by our Cas during 13x22 but instead hitches a ride back to the main ‘verse. Dean and Sam want to keep him alive for information on Michael; Cas is torn and trying to figure out just how similar—or different—they really are. Some great angel stuff here (I also highly recommend this author’s Jack & Cas “dadstiel” fics, they’re equally lovely and heartbreaking at the same time.)
flesh of the mighty by Mudprophet (2.7k) - THEE “What exactly did Dean eat in Purgatory, anyway?” fic you’ve probably already heard about. *cough* I’ve been trying to work up the courage to read this one for a while and finally gave in and OH MY CHUCK I’m so glad I did. It’s perversely disturbing and beautiful at the same time, Cas is wonderfully DERANGED and ALIEN in that way that I love it when fics managed to convey just how much angels are NOT human. Do heed the tags.
Full of Grace by ilovehowyouletmefall (11k) - Another one for the weird-as-fuck-angel!Cas lovers’ list. Heaven/canon-compliant fic where Dean knows he should feel happy and at peace but he just...isn’t, even with Cas and all of his friends and family there. He finally goes looking for Cas when he’s been absent for a time and, for the first time, gets to not just see but experience his true form. Another one that hits some kinks I knew I had and others I didn’t...until now. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
don't ask me where i've been by saltwound / @1x06 (8k) - I can never resist a good 09x06 fiction gap fic! What makes this one really stand out is how well it captures Cas’s internal voice - his struggles adapting to human senses, limitations and emotions versus what/how he experienced things as an angel. The longing and feelings between Dean & Cas here are so achingly beautiful and I just wanted to cry when Cas says he misses hearing Dean’s prayers, so Dean, he...oh, I’m not going to spoil it. *happy sigh* Just read it.
this room is wrong by DarkHeartInTheSky (12k) - Sometimes I like torturing myself with some good 15x03 divorce arc angst and this fic hit that button just so. It’s an alternative take on where Cas might have ended up after leaving the bunker and features some great Cas & Sam friendship feels, when Sam sets out to try to bring Cas home. It’s all the stuff you’d wish the writers would’ve let them talk out in canon.
Well that’s more than enough for this round! Go forth, read and give some great writers some kudos & comment love!
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simply cannot believe i made a supernatural fic rec list in the year 2020 but here we are
When Worlds Collide
When Zachariah dies, the illusions he’s created die with him. But before they collapse completely, sometimes they collide. That’s how Castiel goes from cradling Dean Winchester’s broken body one moment, to finding himself face to face with Dean Smith in the next.
note: basically endverse!cas’s world collapses right after endverse!dean is killed by lucifer and he gets thrown into the it’s a terrible life verse. drama and love and a whole lot of fuckery ensue. it’s tagged as major character death but it’s not really
Broadway Musical
This is the day that marked the Holy and Blessed Union of Dean Winchester and Jo Harvelle.
The merging of prominent bloodlines is always a grand occurrence, but breeding pedigree hunter families like Winchester and Harvelle is something to be rejoiced. It is also something to be meticulously planned, which thankfully the Host is very good at.
note: an AU where dean and jo are destined to fall in love and have two sons who will bring on the apocalypse and be the vessels for michael and lucifer. only problem is cupid’s arrows don’t make them fall in love with each other and heaven promptly starts freaking the fuck out so cas slips into a vessel and tries to do some matchmaking to get the whole end of the world thing back on track. it’s tagged as unrepentant crack and that pretty much sums it up, but it’s also a very funny and enjoyable read
a turn of the earth
Dean’s your typical half-orphaned, monster-killing 22-year-old until a trenchcoated stranger crashes into his back windshield one September night, claiming he’s an angel that knows him from the future and that he’s on the run.
Frigging fantastic.
note: listen i LOVE a good time travel fic
How (thanks to Gabriel) Dean and Castiel (accidentally) raised each other (and Sam)
In which, Gabriel meddles with the time line and Castiel becomes Dean's angel rather sooner than intended.
note: after lucifer stabs gabriel in hammer of the gods, gabriel uses his very last bit of grace to travel back to the beginning of time and decree castiel the angel of thursdays and dean winchester. fast forward a few eons and castiel hears mary’s dying cry. he shows up too late to save her, but he decides that a human life is very short in the grand scheme of things so he can play guardian angel to dean (and by extension sam) while also fulfilling his duties to heaven. not only is this pretty much my favorite supernatural fic, it’s also one of my favorite fics in general
The Shattered One
When it struck Castiel, he was in mid-flight. It dropped him out of the sky like a sparrow buffeted by gale-force winds. Castiel set down the first place he could find. He ended up standing in a field in Switzerland, swaying on his feet and staring down at his body, dazed by what it had just done.
note: okay so listen. this is tagged as mpreg but that’s kind of a stretch imo. it’s not like... mpreg mpreg in the sense that it deals with angel reproduction and has nothing to do with sex or pregnancy. angel reproduction goes like this: a section of an angel’s grace will suddenly and randomly break off and begin to grow on it’s own. after a certain period of time, another angel has to offer a piece of their grace and the two pieces will combine to form a new angel. that new angel is a fully developed, fully functional angel and is considered a new brother/sister instead of an offspring.
cas’s grace shatters which means he’s fucked because this takes place in season 5 after he’s defied heaven. no other angel will offer up a piece of their grace so his own is basically going to rip itself apart, killing him in the process. when dean and sam find out cas is going to die, dean offers up part of his soul in place of another angel’s grace. what results is a new angel that has just enough human in it that it takes the shape of a human baby and sends pretty much all of their lives into a tailspin.
ALSO just a heads up this is definitely more pre-destiel despite the relationship tag. there’s a sequel where im pretty sure they do get together but i haven’t read it so i cant’s say for sure.
Kiss You When It’s Dangerous
When his partner Uriel, betrays him, Federal Agent Castiel Novak is saved from becoming a ritual sacrifice by brothers Dean and Sam Winchester.
note: FBI!cas gets thrown headfirst into the supernatural. tagged as major character death, but again it’s not really
My Roots Take Flight
After forty years in Hell, Dean’s more than willing to accept the offer: become a guardian angel and earn his freedom. But his new ward seems destined to hunt alongside Sam, and there are secrets in Heaven that the angels don’t want found out. Dean’s going to have to choose between his duty and the people he loves- and to work out just where Castiel fits in.
note: season 4 au where dean is an angel and cas is a human except it’s way more complicated than that
Peace and Good Luck To All Men
Christmas in the Milton household was difficult enough without the added complication of guests- and if Luke and Gabriel placing bets on who can get with Sam first wasn’t bad enough, then Cas developing a ridiculous crush on his sister’s boyfriend definitely is.
note: the one where michael, lucifer luke, gabriel, anna and cas are all human siblings but michael and lucifer luke are still trying to kill each other, gabriel is still Like That and cas is still super into dean which is pretty inconvenient considering he’s with anna.
Asunder
Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. (Matthew 19:6)
note: it’s been a very long time since i read this, but from what i remember it’s an AU where they’re all human and dean brings his friend/co-worker cas as his “date” to sam and ruby’s wedding for moral support. when sam was in college, he met ruby and they started using drugs together. after several failed attempts at helping him get clean, dean eventually cut sam off and it’s been years since they’ve spoken. even though sam and ruby are now both sober, dean blames ruby for everything that happened and the only reason he’s even going to the wedding is because bobby and ellen basically force him to. again, it’s been years and years since i read this so i can’t remember a lot of the details, but i do know that despite this being a dean/cas fic a lot of the focus is dean rebuilding his relationship with sam and that’s what i remember really liking about it.
Hanged, Drawn, and Quartered
Death brings Sam back — sort of.
note: a general fic involving only sam and dean. sam’s soul is so damaged from its time in the cage that when death brings it back, it shatters into pieces and so does sam. like literally. there’s four different sams now, each representing a distinctive part of his personality. sounds cracky but it’s actually surprisingly angsty and focuses on how the sams and dean are adjusting to their new reality and each other
Point Pleasant
(okay so this fic was deleted but i’m putting in on here anyway because the author has since turned it into a novel and had it published. im sure old pdfs of the fic are floating around but i highly recommend reading the novel version. if you know it was based on a destiel fic then it’s really easy to see those influences in the writing and the characters but it can stand up on it’s own. also!!!! it has pretty much the coolest take on the mothman’s origin story that i’ve ever heard.)
Ben Wisehart (Dean Winchester) grew up in the idyllic town of Point Pleasant, West Virginia. An early encounter with the supernatural shaped his worldview and served as the catalyst for his career as a bestselling horror writer.
Thirteen years after abandoning his home, Ben returns to the town to investigate the apparent reemergence of the terrifying creature responsible for his childhood nightmares.
In Point Pleasant, Ben is confronted not only by the town’s resident monster, the Mothman, but also by his former best friend, Sheriff Nicholas Nolan (Cas Novak).
Together, Ben and Nicholas (Dean and Cas) uncover the mystery of the monster in the woods and discover that the ghosts that haunt us are sometimes made of flesh and blood.
And sometimes, they lead us home.
Sympathy for the Devil (and Dean Winchester)
this is not so much a rec as it is a request.
basically an au version of season 5 (and kind of the whole series really). when god cast lucifer out of heaven, he tore out his grace. lucifer’s grace was put into the cage, but lucifer himself fell to earth and spent thousands and thousands of years reincarnating as a human. his latest reincarnation? dean winchester. so when sam opens the cage, lucifer’s grace is released and dean realizes that he’s lucifer. part of him still kind of wants to start the apocalypse but the other part of him has a whole new appreciation for humanity considering he now remembers every human life he’s ever lived. it’s made more complicated by the fact that dean (/lucifer) doesn’t really want to tell anyone that he’s apparently the devil so he has to keep his now angel status on the dl and also because despite heaven wanting the apocalypse to start, michael went missing from heaven shortly after lucifer was cast out and no one has any idea where he’s at.
this fic was deleted, but if anyone happens to have a pdf copy let me know. i would be highly appreciative!
#listen i read a lot of spn fic back in the day so im probably leaving a lot off this list#but these are the ones that i remember years and years later#also i just realized these are basically all AUs lmao#destiel#destiel fic rec#supernatural#supernatural fic rec#spn#ficrec
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Sorting Daenerys Targaryen and Jorah Mormont with the sortinghatchats system (GoT verse)
I didn’t want to write this post before I finished my Killing Eve sortings (basically Carolyn and Konstantin), but I’m stuck with them, so I decided to revisit an old fandom instead with a new approach. My take here is possibly an outsider’s take, given that I haven’t interacted with this fandom for a while, save for a few close friends I made in it. Now, bear in mind this sorting system IS NOT the original HP system, it is simply based on it. It sorts you into two houses. Your primary is you WHY, your reason to be who you are, what you believe in. Your secondary is your HOW, the way you act and approach life. Below is a little tl;dr of what each of them are (I’m using the animal terminology that’s being used in many blogs, by the way. If you know the houses, you know what each animal is supposed to represent).
Lion primaries are intuitive and guided by their moral compass, which is very strong (doesn’t mean what they believe in is in fact good or correct) and Lion secondaries are the people who charge straight at something, regardless of whether they will come out of it unscathed or not.
Snake primaries value people. Not any person, their people. They will go to hell and earth for their people to be safe and happy, which can get kind of self destructive. Snake secondaries improvise much like Lion secondaries, but they tend to adapt to situation and shapeshift their way out of problems.
Bird primaries also value right and wrong like Lion primaries, but they build their systems with external information and observation, not from their gut feelings. That means Bird primaries change a lot with time, because their ‘rights’ and ‘wrongs’ change. Bird secondaries collect. Skills, tools, random knowledge, they delve deep and acquire as much of them as they can, not because things are useful, but because it’s fun.
Finally, Badger primaries are also people-persons, but their communities are much broader than a Snake primary’s. They value people, tradition, cultures and so (but not every Badger sees everyone as people, so there’s that). Badger secondaries are the hardworking types in the sense that they cultivate things, they invest in them and even become them.
You can develop models of each house according to what you find useful or what society has instilled in you, but when push come to shove, the models aren’t the real you. All of these houses can burn, meaning their essence is somehow scared away from them due to trauma, depression, societal pressures, etc. That means a Lion stops trusting their instincts, a Snake no longer feels like they’re able to protect their people or their people are better off without them, a Bird loses faith in their systems and a Badger closes themselves off from their communities and adopts a smaller circle of people. Burnt houses can look a lot like each other. For more info, check out the tags.
Daenerys
Double Lion, no doubt (for most of the show). Dany knows what’s right, she feels it in her bones. She never tries to rationalise her decisions and she won’t usually budge, even if she is presented with a more rational plan. None of her advisors have really convinced her to do anything, they might have pushed her to do what they wanted, but if she had her way, Daenerys would only ever listen to her own heart. She needs people around her to help her not make impulsive, brash decisions(because of her Lion secondary that I will get into), but she definitely doesn’t need - and doesn’t want - a moral compass, hers works just fine. She was burned as hell in the first episodes of the first season, mostly because of Viserys’ horrible influence, because he had robbed her of a purpose, of her truth. Drogo also stifles her primary and secondary for a while, but he eventually gives her some space to be herself. When she unburns, she unburns fast. ‘Not a Queen, a Khaleesi’ is pretty much Day gong ‘yeah, I can do things my way, I can be my own person with my own values and my own self.’ I think from there on, her quest to liberate 1) take back the Iron Throne 2) liberate Slaver’s Bay and ‘Break the Wheel’ just show how much she is focused on a big quest that is not explained by reason, by her need to form a community or by the influence of someone in her life. She does it because that’s the Right Thing ™ to do, and that’s Lion primary in a nutshell. Another thing that points towards Lion primary to me is how she just won’t take criticism and specially betrayal well (not that anyone does, but Dany is particularly unforgiving most of the time). Lion primaries are particularly shaken when someone they admire doesn’t have the same moral standards as they do, because deep down they like to think they know what’s ‘good’ and ‘true’ (oops my Snake primary who doesn’t really get Lions is showing), so if you don’t follow them and their beliefs, you must be doing something wrong. This is why Dany is so fucking pissed at Jorah when she finds out he betrayed her. She is also devastated true, and she misses him, but her ideals and her ‘truth’ stop her from seeing things from his side ad from forgiving him until he has proven himself worthy. Her reaction to betrayals tie in to the fact that she is a MASSIVE Lion secondary. She headbutts her way into things and her liberal use of Dracarys is proof of that. That’s not to say she doesn’t think or plan or listen to her advisors, but when push comes to shove, homegirl ACTS. Fuck the consequences, I have three dragons, fucking try me. Don’t tell me that climbing on Drogon in the fighting pits and burning the Khals were calculated decisions. Burning the Lannister army wasn’t a calculated decision. She leaves the planning to the people around her. This is something I struggle with regarding Lions, but I have to admit they are much more prone to seizing opportunities that us Bird secondaries (because I do have a Snake model but it is utter shit).
Now, in seasons 7 and 8, she starts burning again. She gets to Westeros, where people aren’t flocking to her side like they did in Essos. Daenerys lets herself be swayed by Jon’s pretty little speeches that sound very Lion, sound very true to Daenerys, but guess what? She is fucking betrayed by everyone. The people she loved are killed, her children are killed (and the whole ‘I will take what is mine’ thing indicates that she might have a Snaky primary model, after all, she does some things because of what she claimed as hers, be it people or the Throne), she is left absolutely alone, so she burns, she loses faith in herself, starts doubting her actions and her instincts and no one is there to help her unburn safely, so the way she does it is destructive, as it often is with Lion primaries who don’t have guidance in order to regain their trust their instincts and their selves. To me, the KL incidence is her primary going ‘You fucking left me behind, you fuckers, now you are going to see that I was right and fuck the consequences’. Her primary takes a turn for the worse with the help of an impulsive secondary and she ends doing anything to reach her end goal, similar to Albus Dumbledore and his disregard for human life as long as Voldemort being defeated is concerned.
Jorah
I have no doubts whatsoever that Jorah is a Snake primary. I know the fandom likes to sort him into Hufflepuff when using the traditional sorting system and while there’s no doubts he is a loyalist to the bone, Jorah’s loyalties are much narrower than a Badger primary’s would be. Before he meets Daenerys, he wants to go home and make up with his family, because they are the ones who matter. Not his reputation, not the North, not Bear Islad itself, the Mormont House. Before that still, he does literally anything to keep Lynesse happy, including doing things that are against the law. This utter devotion to certain people are what makes him a Snake primery to me, a paricularly self destructive one. He starts worrying about the fact that he berayed Daenerys when he ‘adopts’ her into his circles and more so when she goes from being in his outermost circles to being the one person his Snake primary is attached to. Daeerys is everything to Jorah. Does he persoally care about freeing slaves or generally following her morals? No, he does it because it is importat to her and he wants her to see he is worthy of her attention (I, another Snek, still don’t kow if I like Florence + The Machine so damn much because I liked a girl who was into FATM or if my Bird secondary saw her taste for FATM and went ‘OMG ME TOO LETS TALK ABOUT THAT’ and the primary just said ‘huh, that’s legit. We’ll worship her from now on’, so yeah, us Snakes do that. On a side note, I never worked up the courage to ask her out, though). That’s why he goes batshit when she banishes him. He doesn’t burn, which means his primary is so strong it wasn’t fazed by being ast out of her circles; no, he is hell bent on getting back into her good graces and if he has to sacrifice his life fr that, so be it.
Now, when it comes to secondary, I’d say Jorah’s a Lion secondary too, even though he has a lot of models he picked up with time. Models are useful, models get you out of bad situations, but they’re not who you really are. Jorah wans to be a Bird secondary when he’s around Daenerys, he wants to be the careful planner who looks ahead and ensures she is successful and he also needs a Snake secondary model, because his life demands that he twists and turns himself to fit different situations, but deep inside he is a Lion. His most honest moments are the moments when he just does it, no thoughts head empty. Did he have a solid plans when he kidnapped Tyrion? Fuck no! Did he truly know what he was doing when he decided to fight in the pits? Fuck no! Did he think before he charged at the wights and saved Daenerys in Winterfell? Fuck no! His head was probably just going ‘my Daenerys is in danger let’s punch first and see what happens later’. He’s not like Littlefinger, who plans everything ad is so fast at analysing and changing plans he looks like a Snake. His models make him seem like the opposite of Dany, like a Bird to a Lion, brains while she is brawn, but when she is in danger, Jorah charges.
What the Jorleesi shippers do is take Dany’s Lion primary that is so focused on a quest and show her that she can also include people in her big aspirations. The gut feeling that is so characteristic of Lions is already inside her, all she would need is to put it into words, which isn’t necessarily the strongest suits of many Lions (that’s a Bird thing). Since most of their dynamics inevitably lies on Jorah’s models regulating Dany’s secondary, there’s not much point in ‘taming her Lion’. Jorah stays the same. The fandom looooves his Snake/Lion, specially since us Snakes tend to be too hard on ourselves. A self-loathing Snake who is also a stupid brave Lion secondary? Yes. They are both stupid brave. Also just stupid. Just talk, you two, for fuck’s sake. Get over your Lion, Daenerys, and talk to him, his Snake won’t allow him to bother you too much.
#daenerys targaryen#jorah mormont#Dany x Jorah#jorleesi#sortinghatchats#lion primary#gryffindor primary#lion secondary#gryffindor secondary#snake primary#slytherin primary#double lion#snake/lion
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okay so this is going to be a very long post of how i’m handling p5r on this blog now that i’ve beaten it! it’ll be under a cut for length/how much content i’m talking about and for spoilers of course!
the tl;dr of this for people that haven’t completed p5r are this: i’m tagging any and all content involving royal (especially third semester + the endings) and i’m no longer going to be tagging spoilers for vanilla p5.
with that out of the way, for those of you that have completed p5r, it’s time to get right into it!
okay starting with the most obvious the two muses on my blog that are the most affected because of p5r are akira and akechi, primarily because of third semester content, but ann, yusuke and futaba are affected mostly because of their third tier personas (and showtime attacks + futaba being able to cause all out attacks) and their choices of what they want to do in the true ending! but for the most part their personalities are remaining the same so there’s no real noticeable changes being made to them for royal verses
as for akira and akechi...akira is mostly staying the same as how i write him in vanilla p5 (other than a bit more emphasis on his relationship with akechi in practical because yeah, akechi does mean a lot to him especially looking at third semester) but as for akechi...oh boy.
akechi is staying the same as how i write him during vanilla p5′s events but as for third semester...akechi is not dealing with his ‘pleasant boy’ personality during this point bc yes, akechi have very valid reasons for being as ‘feral’ as he is during third semester. i don’t 100% agree with some of the stuff that he does during this time (manly just that yes, he has a reason for being as feral/anger as he is, and he has no reason to hide behind pleasantries at this point in the game’s canon unless it’s necessary re: right at the beginning of third semester events but he doesn’t enjoy killing as much as the game/mostly the battle dialogue would suggest but uh. that’s a topic for a another day. the tl;dr of this is yes, i’m keeping him being genuinely pissed/angry during third semester but no, he’s not as feral/bloodthirsty as the game says he is)
and for well...that stringer at the end of the true ending’s credits, i am going with yes, akechi did survive and that the akechi we see during third semester is the real akechi. how he survived is something i’m unsure about since canon doesn’t give us much but what i’m going with is that akechi doesn’t remember how he survived bc he himself says during the 2/2 conversation that he has a gap in his memory from the fight up until meeting up with akira again (on 12/24 aka when he turns himself in for akira), so really, he doesn’t know. so he’ll be vague but in post true ending scenarios, all he’ll be able to say for sure is he remembers what happened in shido’s palace and the events of third semester. (also just as food for thought with this - canon does establish that memory loss is a common side effect for those that get put into a psychotic breakdown berserk state and just what does akechi do to himself during his boss fight? here’s a meta post for just some more proof)
(also as a sidenote to this post a lot of the meta posts/translations i get are from that blog and they’re what’s helped me to make my decisions so just throwing that out there for reference!)
now, moving onto my muses relationships with sumire/maruki! (and time for me to break my formatting bc why can’t i do bullet points and block quote thanks for nothing tumblr) so first up: sumire!
for ann and yusuke: they both don’t hold super strong feelings towards her other than she’s around the same age as us and she’s like us. really, it just that yes, they she her as a friend and teammate, but that she’s not someone they’ve known for a long time, so they don’t have the same level of friendship/attachment as say, akira does.
for futaba: she does see her as a friend and teammate, and tries to be casual with her since they’re the same age for most of the game. she’d like to talk to her more and honestly, she’s one of the few people i can say that futaba might get a crush on so i do ship them.
for akechi: the devs already said that quite frankly, he doesn’t care for her that much. the literal term they say is to death (also here’s a post that translates about the royal trio and akechi’s feelings toward both sumi and akira) so really, unless they seriously talk then akechi isn’t gonna be as friendly as some of the other thieves with her. he’ll be polite if he has to but we know that he can be quite blunt and no nonsense as seen in third semester.
for akira: he does care about her, as a friend and teammate. he’s the only member of the thieves that’s really talked to her for longer than the time in third semester + the christmas/new years stuff and the ending and he does want to support her. he wants to help her, to see her regain her courage and strength and she here become who she was again (especially in third semester, he wants to help her become strong so she can live as sumire and not kasumi) and if he has to help her, he will.
and in terms of shipping, she’s neutral for ann and yusuke, liked for futaba, notp for akechi and for akira...somewhere in being neutral to notp.
and now for maruki!
for ann, yusuke and futaba: they’re firmly neutral in terms of opinions. yes, the stuff he did during third semester does make them mad but they’re also mad at themselves for giving into his dream world and turning their backs on akira during this time. plus they all talked to him and yes, he’s not a bad person but also his actions in third semester are just...a lot for them to deal with (especially with the whole falling into his dream world) so while they can’t forgive what he’s done, they do think that his goals are well...not entirely moral but they’re better than the other adults they’ve taken down.
for akechi: oh boy. most of the reason why he is so pissed off in third semester is because of him. akechi during third semester does harbor something akin to anger towards him, especially because he’s the one that created the dream world, and for as far as he knows is the reason he’s alive and hasn’t committed any crimes in this world. akechi states that he refuses to be a puppet on a string (again, mind you) and this dream world? it’s basically everything he hate because yes, he’s done so many things wrong and deep down, doesn’t believe he deserves to be forgiven for what’s he’s done. he’s going to crave his own path, and not have it handed to him or be a puppet to someone else (again). i do think that post p5r, if he got the chance to speak to him, while he wouldn’t be able to forgive him for the events he caused, he wouldn’t be so openly hostile towards him.
for akira: out of all the thieves, he’s probably the most reluctant to truly agree to stopping him because maruki has a point. he wants to help others and save them from suffering. but his methods in doing so are just wrong. the dream world created is both something akira wants to give into but also can’t give into. because it’s not right. it’s not right to him, or any of his friends because while they’re happy, they also didn’t go through what caused them all to change and grow. plus akira helped him with his research and knows that yes, maruki is not a bad person but what his methods are will not help out everyone in the long run. i will say that akira almost folds on 2/2 from stopping him because of that conversation (and well...also because of his relationship/feelings with akechi but that’s a story for another time) but ultimately stands up against him because taking his offer is taking the easy way out. and akira has never, not once taken the easy way out at any point during his time as a thief. plus in the end, even when maruki said he was done, akira still leapt to save him (which ties so heavily into the savior complex/chronic hero syndrome - it’s one of the two i swear- i write akira with aka wanting to help people no matter what) because yeah, you can be hurt but you can move on and heal. post p5r while akira can’t forgive his actions, he’s probably the most willing to talk to him and try to reestablish some kind of bond with him again.
and well...as for verses i’m adding because of royal, i’m technically adding four but i’m really adding three because one of them is so selective but there’s a part of me that wants to write it anyways so yeah! i’m adding verses for main p5r canon, third semester, post p5r’s true ending and (selectively) bad ending verse (aka when you accept maruki’s deal - but for akira and akechi only as they’re the only ones that will know the bad ending isn’t right.) i will say i vastly prefer the true ending to the bad ending, the bad ending is something i think would be fun to explore. all of these verses will have their own tags and i will be using the p5r spoilers tag for all of these posts which brings me to...
...how i’m tagging spoilers! basically, everything involving something exclusive to royal will be tagged, and all royal verses will have the spoiler tag, crack posts being throwing into the tag as well (because honestly, i can’t help myself) but basically, if it’s in royal, it’s getting tagged (especially third semester and post true ending). also i’m not going to be tagging spoilers for vanilla p5 anymore. the vanilla version has been out for three and a half years in japan and three everywhere else. my rules will be updated to reflect this soon enough. (and as a sidenote to all of this, to keep myself from spoiling the truth about sumi, i’m referring to her as kasumi in my image tag for her and on the pages for my muses for shipping but in threads, if they’re in anything other than canon timeline (aka before third semester and the truth comes out) she’ll be referred to as sumire. otherwise she’s kasumi so i don’t spoil anyone about that twist!)
and one last point to this very, very long post! i’m working on a post for a headcanon of mine i’ve had since the game released in which royal is ng+ to akira. it’s a very headcanon heavy and in some ways self-indulgent verse but something i hold dear to me and want to write really badly. however it isn’t my default verse for akira when it comes to royal content. i don’t want to force people to write this verse with me but i want it to be an option because it means a lot to me and it also makes sense within p5r’s canon.
anyways! if you’ve read all of this post thank you so much for reading it because of how long it is but i felt it was important to get all of this out on the table now that i’ve completed p5r!
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Signs
Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Jack Kline, Castiel
Word Count: 4,089
Warnings: Destiel, language, some angst, but then no angst! So there you go.
A/N: So, I have newly embraced the idea of Destiel, and I had actually posted this on a side blog that was going to be where that stuff went until both @pinknerdpanda and I decided that was silly. She was the sweet angel that beta’d this for me, and I’m super proud of how it turned out. It’s an interesting concept that I wish would have really happened...but then again, I suppose I’m a little biased. lol Anyway, I hope you enjoy it!
I will only be tagging those that have specifically shown interest in Destiel things. If you’d like to be added, then please let me know.
“I am the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition.”
It had been awhile since those words echoed in Dean’s mind, but lately, it was the one thing that kept coming back to him in the dark, the memory of electric eyes and shadowy wings spread across the abandoned hangar still vivid despite the long passage of time.
But that's all he had left, wasn't it? Memories...of Cas, of his mom. Both of them gone, taken away from him by Lucifer. As if they hadn't lost enough because of him, he lost his mom and his best friend in the blink of an eye. What they had left was a broken family and a kid that didn't know up from down, left from right.
It had been weeks since Cas had fallen, the sand marred by the tattered remains of his wings, and Dean couldn't understand why this was different. He always blamed himself, always felt a deep anguish for things that were inevitably his fault, but Cas’ death had torn something from him and, though he was almost ashamed to admit this, it was far worse than losing Mary. The only time he'd felt remotely like he currently was was when he'd left Lisa and Ben behind, and even that paled in comparison. The image of the angel blade piercing Cas’ chest, the slow crumple as he fell, the bright blue light that shot from him as his grace flickered out...it was like someone had reached into his chest and ripped out his heart.
He attributed it to Cas being his best friend, the closest person to him other than Sam. Hell, Cas had saved him, literally pulling him out of the fire. Dean had done what Dean had always done in these kinds of situations; he'd hit on every waitress, bartender, and witness that he could, and slept with half as many as he would have liked. It wasn't a great way to deal with things, but it usually worked as a temporary distraction. This time, however, it only seemed to make it worse. Sam kept asking him what was wrong, but how could he answer a question he didn't know the answer to? So instead, he stayed grouchy and irritable, and threatened to kill the nephilim every chance he got.
That was, until this morning. He had been sleeping; not well, chasing nightmares he couldn't quite grasp, but he'd finally fallen into a fitful sleep. Suddenly, he was awakened by a sudden fire, a flame running up his arm and coalescing in his tricep, and he sat up as he grasped at the burning flesh, a strangled scream caught in his throat.
“Dean?! What's wrong?” The light clicked on abruptly and Dean squinted at the sudden brightness.
“Jesus, Sam, it’s fine. It was just a dream.” His hand lingered over the spot, his fingers slipping under his sleeve and finding rough skin where it once was smooth. “Go back to sleep.” Dean reached over and clicked the light back off and waited as Sam rolled over and pulled the blankets over himself. He quickly fell back into a deep slumber and Dean shifted, hanging his legs over the edge of the bed as he ran a hand over his face. Though the initial excruciating burn was gone, he could feel a tingle just below the surface, a reminder that whatever he'd thought he'd dreamed was real. He quietly stood and walked to the bathroom, checking to make sure Jack was also still asleep as he walked into the darkened room. He shut the door behind him with a muted click before flipping on the light. A bedraggled mess looked back at him; hair sticking up every which way, a five day beard that was slowly obscuring his face, and tired eyes that could use at least eight more hours of sleep.
His eyes traveled down to his arm, and he squinted at the slightly puckered, pink skin peeking out from below his sleeve. There's no way. The thought echoed in his mind, a denial that he knew he couldn't keep up. And then another thought, the first thing he'd ever heard Cas say.
“I am the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition.”
His hand moved on its own, gripping the soft edge of his t-shirt sleeve, and pulled. He stared wide eyed at the mark that, just a few moments before, hadn't been there. The mark that hadn't been there for almost a decade, the one that had disappeared over the years of death and resurrection.
The hand print that had saved him from a millennia of pain and torture, and the undoing of his very self. Cas’ hand, burned into him like a brand, a reminder of who he was and what was expected of him. There it was, plain as day, and there was absolutely no explanation for it.
He looked back up in the mirror, the exhaustion replaced by confusion and, if he was being honest, a little fear.
“What the hell?”
The car was silent other than the low rumble of the engine and the quiet rock music Dean had put on for background noise. Sam had spent the majority of the afternoon scrolling through his phone, and Jack had sat in the back, quietly flipping through a magazine Sam had grabbed for him at the last gas station. Dean rolled his shoulders, trying to ease the tension that had settled deep into his muscles while he ignored the dull ache in his upper arm.
“You okay?” He glanced over to see Sam staring at him, his brow furrowed in concern.
“Yea, why?”
“You seem...tense.”
Dean rolled his eyes, “This is kind of a tense time, Sam. Mom is gone, probably dead, Cas is dead, we’re stuck with…” he looked up in the rearview to see Jack looking at him and sighed. “We’re not exactly living the dream.” His eyes returned to the road, and he tried to ignore his brother’s concerned gaze.
“What about last night?”
“What about it? I had a bad dream, it woke me up. I think we both are well versed in those.”
“I heard you talking to yourself.” Jack’s voice chimed in from the backseat, and Dean glared at him through the rear view.
“You didn't hear shit. You were asleep.”
“I don't really need sleep-”
“I said, you didn't hear shit.” Dean fell silent again and once again the only sounds in the car were the deep rumble of the engine and the low din of Metallica pulsing through the speakers.
Dean tried to ignore the pulsing in his arm, an insistent beat like a drum, set to its own rhythm.
What the hell was going on?
Dean sighed, the breeze cool against his face as he sat in the sun, his legs stretched out lazily in front of him. The worn handle of the fishing rod fit easily against his palm, almost as if it had spent countless hours resting in the same spot. The lake he was sitting in front of was a pristine blue, surrounded by mountains and green trees as far as the eye could see.
It was perfect.
Despite the seemingly calm perfection, he had a nagging thought in the back of his mind, the familiarity of the scene egging it on. But what was it? A tug on his line distracted him from the question, his hand automatically shifting from the handle to the reel, and slowly began turning.
"Dean."
The low, gravelly voice startled him out of his idyllic moment, and he turned to see Cas standing next to him, looking out over the lake but standing close enough that they could touch if Dean just put his hand out. Instead, he returned his gaze to the water, and began slowly reeling in his line.
"What are you doing here?"
"You should ask yourself that. It is your dream."
Dean rolled his eyes, "Yea, but I was perfectly content just fishing. I didn't want to see my dead best friend, alright? Not my idea of a dream.” He cast out his line again, and watched as it clung to the surface of the water before breaking the tension and sinking into the darkness.
“It is important that we talk, Dean.”
“How important can it be to talk to a dead guy? What else can we possibly talk about other than the fact that you’re gone, and Sam and I are on our own?”
“You have been on your own before.”
Dean gripped the rod tighter, his knuckles turning white as he forced himself to stay calm. “Just because I’ve been on my own doesn’t mean…” He took a deep breath, then continued, “It’s not the same, Cas. I...we...were on our own. And then we weren’t, okay? A person gets used to it, and it’s not like we have much family left. I’m tired of losing people.”
“I do not think you are as alone as it seems. It is only a matter of time before you will see.”
Dean looked up at Cas, his eyes even more blue than he remembered as he looked down at him. “What’s that supposed to mean?” He was surprised Cas could even hear his question, his voice barely above a whisper.
“Wait for the sign.” Cas dropped his hand on Dean’s shoulder, and Dean’s chest tightened at the touch. He closed his eyes as he reached up, his fingers just grazing Cas’. A single tear rolled down his cheek as he moved his hand upwards, his palm covering rough knuckles.
Suddenly, his arm was on fire again, an intense burn that moved from his fingertips all the way to his shoulder, stopping just below where Cas’ hand was resting.
“Wait for the sign.”
Dean sat up with a jerk, and hastily wiped away the tear that was still rolling down his cheek. The dream was already fading into a mostly forgotten memory, except for a pair of exceptionally blue eyes standing out in the darkness. He heard someone clearing their throat and looked up to see Sam staring at him. “What?” he asked roughly, throwing back the blanket and shuffling to the bathroom before the younger Winchester could answer. He avoided looking in the mirror; he knew whatever he saw there would be rough; no need to dwell on it.
“What was that about?” Sam asked as Dean reappeared from the bathroom, and despite his obvious effort to mask it, Dean could hear the concern in his voice.
“It was just a dream.”
“A dream about Cas isn’t ‘just a dream’,” he air quoted annoyingly.
Dean sat down on the edge of his bed, reaching for the jeans that were hanging on the end of it, “How’d you know it was about Cas?”
“You repeating his name over and over again kind of gave it away.” He paused, then tilted his head as he caught a glimpse of Dean’s arm as the sleeve shifted. “What happened to your arm?”
Dean grabbed his shirt from the chair and pulled it on, “Nothin’. Bruise from the last hunt, nothing to be concerned about.”
Sam left his spot at the small kitchenette table and walked over to the bed, “Lemme see it.”
Dean glared at him as he pulled on one of his boots, “Why would I do that? It’s not a big deal, I already told you it was a bruise from the last hunt. Let it go, Elsa.”
“Come on, let me see.” Sam went to grab his arm and Dean dodged it as he pushed him away.
“Back the hell up, man. I said it was nothing.” Although a majority of the burning was gone, it was still tender to the touch, and it took everything Dean had not to grimace as the flannel rubbed against the mark. Sam looked at him for a moment as if contemplating his next move, then suddenly moved towards Dean, one hand going for the edge of shirt, the other coming down on where he thought the mark was.
Sam’s aim, despite not knowing exactly what he was looking for, was true, and he landed directly on the hand print. Pain shot down Dean’s arm and back up, and he shoved Sam as hard as he could away from him. Sam hit the ground with a resounding thud, and he looked up at Dean from the floor in surprise.
“Goddammit Sam, that hurt!”
“I barely touched you! What the hell was that?!”
“He has a brand.” Both Winchesters spun around to see Jack sitting quietly on the couch, watching the television with the sound all the way down.
“The fuck did you say?” Dean growled, taking a step toward the nephilim.
“I said, you have a brand. It's Cas’ handprint.”
“Is he right, Dean? Is it?”
Dean ripped his flannel off and threw it angrily to the side, then grabbed his shirt sleeve and yanked it upwards, displaying the newly burned mark.
“Fine, yes, are you happy?!”
“I don't know that happy is the word I would use. Confused, yes. Happy, I'm not really sure. When the hell did that show up?” Sam pulled himself out of the floor and resumed his place at the table.
“I dunno, couple nights ago. I just...woke up and it was there.” Sam narrowed his eyes, “Why didn't you tell me?”
“Why the hell did I need to? Cas is gone, Sam, he's gone. This changes nothing, and,” he threw a hateful glare towards Jack, “we have bigger concerns on our hands.”
Sam rolled his eyes, “Did it ever occur to you that this might mean Cas isn't...gone gone? That maybe it's some sort of sign that he's still here, somewhere?”
“What kind of sign? A reminder that we failed yet again? Sign, my ass.” Dean tried to ignore the obvious use of the word, images from his dream resurfacing as he tried to ignore it. He didn’t need any signs; his best friend was gone.
“Not a sign of failure, more like a sign of your…” Sam trailed off, afraid of pointing out the thing they’d all pretty much been ignoring.
“My what, Sam?”
Sam sighed, “Your connection to Cas. We both know it’s much stronger between the two of you than Cas and I. You guys...you have a bond.”
“What does that mean…bond?”
Dean glared at Jack but remained silent, shifting his gaze to Sam.
“It's just that Cas saved Dean, and he's always...I mean, he cares very much about-”
“Alright, that's enough of that. I'm leaving.” Dean grabbed the keys from the table and stormed towards the door.
“Where are you going?”
He threw the door open, then turned back to Sam, “For a drive. Don't wait up.” He slammed the door shut, then went straight to the Impala. He needed air, a chance to think. Sam had no idea what he was talking about...did he?
Dean pulled into the overgrown field and put the car into park, his mind racing with thoughts of Cas and his dream, what Sam had said, and the now constantly aching hand print on his shoulder. He got out and slammed the door shut, pacing back and forth as he mumbled to himself.
“Bond...he doesn't have a damn clue what he's talking about. He's my best friend, obviously there's a...a bond.” He stopped walking and sat on the hood of the Impala and leaned back, his hands behind his head as he stared up into the sky. He hadn't prayed for awhile, not since Cas had been killed, and he didn't really see what good it would do now.
He sighed; it couldn't hurt either. “Cas...if you've got your ears on, I...we could really use you down here. Everything's gone to hell, I don't know what to do with Jack...and I don't understand why your handprint is back. Sam says it's because of our bond, but that sounds like bullshit. We’re family, of course there's a bond.” He reached up and put his hand over the print, matching his fingers with Cas’, and sighed. The warmth flooded from it, moving from his fingertips all the way up to his shoulder, then downward, until it buried itself deep within his gut.
It was a familiar feeling, one he'd felt hundreds of times when he'd go home with whatever piece of ass he could get his hands on. Crass, and not exactly the same, but it was as close as he could get to describing the sudden tightening in his stomach. For a moment, it almost felt like the fingers he'd aligned with his own were shifting, filling in the empty spaces and curling around his hand. His eyes flew open, but just like that, the feeling was gone.
He looked down at his arm, the scar a deeper shade than before, and sighed. He didn't understand any of this; why the mark had returned, this feeling of longing usually only reserved for those that caught his attention at the bar, and the ever present denial of there being something more between the two of them than anyone else.
“Cas...please come back. We need you to come home. I need you to come home.” After a moment of silence, he sat up with a sigh and slid off the hood. “Figures…” he mumbled to himself as he reached for the door handle. Suddenly, the fire in his shoulder returned, and he collapsed into the closed door, nearly biting his tongue to keep in the pained yell. As quick as it began, it stopped. No fading away, no slowly relinquishing tingling like before; just a hard stop, as if he had imagined it.
He reached down, his fingers tracing along the edge of his shirt sleeve before slowly raising it to find smooth, freckled skin. No hand print.
“What the hell?” He swiped his hand across where the print had been just moments before, but not only was it gone, so was the feeling it gave, the feeling that Cas was there. Whatever it was was gone, and Dean felt his stomach drop. Cas was gone. Truly gone. Whatever hope Dean had of Sam being right...well, it had disappeared with it.
Then his phone rang.
Dean had always overlooked traffic laws and speed limits while traveling back roads; in the rare instances that he did get pulled over, he simply would flash a smile and charm his way out of it. Sam was always impressed by it, and though he'd never admit it, a little jealous. But tonight, nothing would stop Dean. He ignored yield signs and stop lights, flew through intersections, blasted through a railroad crossing as the bar came down, and narrowly avoided being caught by a state trooper who, by sheer luck, had already pulled someone else over for weaving back and forth over the center line.
Always the one to use a map rather than GPS, Dean had also broken that rule; his eyes constantly drifted over to look at the phone in Sam’s hand, the estimated time of arrival dropping as he pressed the gas harder.
Seventy five miles.
Fifty miles.
Twenty-five miles.
You have arrived at your destination.
Dean abruptly stopped as he caught sight of the shadowy figure hovering at the phone booth, the shadow from the grimy streetlight obscuring most of the details. He didn't need details; the tight feeling in his gut as he stared at the figure was answer enough. If it hadn't been, the fluttering edge of a trench coat in the sudden breeze certainly was.
“Dean.”
His breath caught at the sound; deep and gravelly, the voice almost didn't go with the owner.
He had arrived at his destination. Although, if he really was honest with himself, he'd arrived as his destination way earlier and had taken his time actually getting there.
He climbed out of the car and walked towards Cas. Jack began to follow and Sam held out an arm to stop him. Jack looked at him in confusion, unsure as to why he couldn't go to his father, the man who was supposed to keep him safe, but obeyed Sam’s silent request to stay put. Dean stopped just short of Cas, his hands still at his sides.
“How?” It came out a whisper, and Cas’ gaze darted over his shoulder towards Jack, then back to Dean.
“I am unsure, though I believe it deals with the child.”
Dean took another step forward, “Where were you?”
Cas shook his head, “I...I do not know. I was somewhere and nowhere. There was darkness...nothingness. It was...disconcerting.”
Another step, then another, until Dean was standing toe to toe with him. Cas’ eyes narrowed, locked with Dean’s, and Dean wondered how he'd missed how blue they were. Without thinking or thought to anyone else standing around, he threw his arms around him and gripped him tightly.
“You can't leave me again. You hear me? You can't leave me like that again,” he whispered fiercely in Cas’ ear, his voice breaking as Cas’ arms found their way around his waist.
“I am sorry, Dean. I did not realize-”
“Don't...don't apologize. Just...don't ever do that again.” He pulled back and stared at Cas, taking in everything he could. It occurred to him that their arms were still around each other and for a moment, he considered moving away. Instead of doing that, however, he leaned his forehead against Cas’ and closed his eyes. The feeling was back; only this time, it was his entire body that felt like it was on fire. Every part that touched Cas tingled, spreading warmth through him until he thought he couldn't take it anymore.
“Dean?”
“Hmm?”
“I would very much like to kiss you. Is that okay?” Dean opened his eyes, and for a moment didn't know how to answer. He took in Cas’ wrinkled brow, furrowed in concern, his messy hair, and crooked tie. Kissing Cas had never really occurred to him, not until he was gone and Dean realized there was more to them than just the angel and the hunter, but now that Cas was back...should they? Cas’ arm began to loosen around his waist and Dean panicked; he had waited too long to answer. So, instead of answering, Dean did the thing he knew he was better at than talking.
He pressed a palm on each of Cas’ cheeks and moved in, his lips pressing gently, almost chastely, against his. They were chapped, just like always, but Dean was surprised to find that they were even softer than most girls he'd been with, warm and plump. His tongue darted out as he decided to push his luck and explore, and not surprisingly, his lips tasted of honey. He jumped a little as Cas’ tongue joined his, but quickly recovered and let his lips part so that Cas could do his own exploring.
Then it was over. Dean took a deep breath and let his hands drop, staring at Cas as if he'd disappear any second. “Whoa.”
Cas gave him a rare smile, “I believe that is a good response. Can I tell you something?”
Dean nodded, “Of course you can.”
“While I was gone...in the empty, as the entity I met there called it, all I wanted was to go home. And after being there for awhile, it felt like millennia, it occurred to me that when I thought of home, I was not thinking of Heaven. I was thinking of you. I held onto that, and though I believe it was Jack’s powers that pulled me physically from that place, I never would have made it out whole without the thought of you.”
Dean’s mouth dropped open, unprepared for the eloquent and touching speech. “I...I don't know what to say, Cas.”
“You do not need to say anything. You are here, that is enough.” He nodded over Dean’s shoulder, “I believe we should probably discuss this more in depth later, as we have an audience. And also things to take care of.”
Dean looked back in time to see Sam forcibly turn Jack around and pretend that neither of them saw anything. “Yea, let's go,” he chuckled as they walked back to the car.
As he slid into the front seat, he smiled to himself. Next time, he would believe in all the signs.
Destiel Tags: @pinknerdpanda @mrswhozeewhatsis @thing-you-do-with-that-thing @jeweldancerwrites <--I feel like I tagged the wrong person...please tell me if I did. lol
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I posted 6,426 times in 2021
176 posts created (3%)
6250 posts reblogged (97%)
For every post I created, I reblogged 35.5 posts.
I added 2,882 tags in 2021
#the magnus archives - 772 posts
#marvel - 740 posts
#art - 368 posts
#loki - 180 posts
#mineminemine - 170 posts
#dc - 157 posts
#rusty quill gaming - 156 posts
#the penumbra podcast - 118 posts
#music - 117 posts
#pokemon - 104 posts
Longest Tag: 139 characters
#it's trying to push both us and jon into ‘’seeeeee being an avatar and doing terrible things to innocent people is understandable and not t
My Top Posts in 2021
#5
I've seen a few stories now feature malicious narrators as the villain, and I'm growing really fond of the trope. I'm sure you could make a very solid argument about it being appealing because it's a metaphor for taking control of your own story, but mostly I like it because it comes with delightfully campy villains who are just in it for the evil lulz
178 notes • Posted 2021-01-22 23:31:33 GMT
#4
There's meta out there about how part of the tragedy of the series is that Jon learns his lessons too late or applies them to the wrong situations, but the tragedy of the finale in that Jon is the only one who learned the lesson. He's the one who knows the full horror of the Entities. He's the one to know what it means to subject others to those horrors. He's the one to internalize that you can't harm others just to save yourself. He's the one who knows not to trust the Web because he knows exactly what it's capable of. He's the one to know what it's like to carry the guilt of something that monumental. He's the one who knows exactly how every single person is suffering, who can't just look away or brush it under a rug in another universe and go "not my problem."
And he's outvoted by people who haven't learned those lessons.
306 notes • Posted 2021-03-25 18:20:48 GMT
#3
The Silt Verses does a masterful job of introducing you to these lawless serial killer protagonists and making you think oh these are terrible people and if this story was any genre other than horror they would be the villains. And then it gradually pans out to a wider view of their society as a whole as you gradually realize no these serial killers are the only vaguely decent people literally everyone else is so much worse. Sure they run around drowning people, but at least they’re not CEOs who literally melt employees alive just for a company rebrand
406 notes • Posted 2021-04-21 23:10:01 GMT
#2
Damian Wayne should be aroace because he's got the vibe of like, a kid who scoffs at anything vaguely related to dating because he thinks it's gross and he's above all that and then all the adults go ohohoho you'll understand when you're older except Damian IS above all that and still thinks it's stupid even as an adult. Like when he's 13 he investigates a murder that turns out to have been a crime of passion and he's complaining about how stupid that is and Alfred's like you'll understand someday but fast forward 10 years and he's solved yet another murder that spun out of someone cheating on their partner and he's still like God you're so stupid all of this just because you couldn't keep it in your pants you're pathetic.
635 notes • Posted 2021-10-30 20:04:15 GMT
#1
Podcast recs for Magnus Archives fans
So, the Magnus Archives has reached its finale. If you’re looking for a new horror podcast to turn to next, here are some recommendations to fill the Magnus Archives shaped hole in your heart
The Silt Verses
Two worshipers of an evil god go on a pilgrimage. Along the way they come across other gods, the human sacrifices they are offered, and the gruesome “miracles” they bestow in exchange.
Features lots of ambiance, body horror, commentary on the commodification of devotion, and an aspec main character
Old Gods of Appalachia
Eldritch horror set in the Appalachian Mountains in the late 1800s. This podcast feels like sitting around a campfire deep in the woods listening to scary stories.
Features nature and witch themed horror, and an aroace major character
Spines
A woman wakes up in a literal pool of blood with no memories, so she goes in search of who she is and what happened to her.
Features cult and superpower themed horror, gradually building stakes, and an unexpected yet satisfying ending
Among the Stars and Bones
Xeno-archaeologists investigate an ancient abandoned alien mining colony in hopes of figuring out why it was abruptly abandoned.
Features hard sci-fi, gradually building suspense, and creative sci-fi twists on archeology themed horror tropes like mummies and pharaoh’s curses
Desperado
Three people become avatars for death gods from their respective cultures, and they join together to help protect themselves and their heritage from superpowered genocidal crusaders. Desperado is more adventure + found family than true horror, but there are some really chilling scenes that are elevated to terrifying by its amazing sound editing.
Features found family, magic, death gods, bloodbending superpowers, and PHENOMENAL sound editing
Unwell, a Midwestern Gothic Mystery
A woman moves to a small town to help take care of her aging mother. The town is full of weird happenings, conspiracies, and ghosts, both literal and interpersonal
Features haunted house horror, familial and found family relationships, and an endearing and eccentric cast of characters
1095 notes • Posted 2021-03-26 23:29:38 GMT
Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →
#my 2021 tumblr year in review#your tumblr year in review#Everything about this is the opposite of suprising#except that apparently I made more posts than I would have thought I'd've guessed only 1%
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REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 19th May 2019 (Ed Sheeran & Justin Bieber, Skepta)
This episode is a day late. Sorry for that but due to conflicts with my personal schedule often I have to rush the episodes and I was much too busy to finish this in on time. I know that’s pretty much verbatim what I wrote on Twitter but the new Singles Chart is already out so I want to get this as quick as possible. I can tell you for a fact we’ve got a lot of good stuff coming next week I want to talk about so I’m not promising you a great episode here. Most of what I say will be completely obsolete actually so I’ve decided to ditch the Top 10, Climbers and Fallers entirely, making this a guaranteed shortest episode ever. This was already written so it pains me to do so but I feel like it’d be a tad pointless telling you this info when I’m planning to get the next episode out quite literally tomorrow or at least on Sunday, because there’s going to be a different chart review within the next week, and it’s already freely available on the Internet. It would be redundant to make my already redundant job here anymore redundant... I’ve lost myself. Let’s run through Dropouts and such.
Dropouts & Returning Entries
“M.E.N. II” by Bugzy Malone is out after one week from the debut at #34, while elsewhere we have mostly expected dropouts, nothing surprising. “Sweet but Psycho” by Ava Max is finally out from #36, “Boy with Luv” by BTS featuring Halsey is out from #37 because who expected a K-pop song to last more than a few weeks in the Top 40? “Pretty Shining People” by George Ezra is also out from #39, whilst “Disaster” by Dave featuring J Hus has its streaming cuts and is out from #40. Now there are no returning entries but a massive amount of new arrivals. Let’s go.
NEW ARRIVALS
#39 – “Late Night Feelings” – Mark Ronson featuring Lykke Li
Produced by Mark Ronson and Picard Brothers – Peaked at #5 in Belgium
Remember Mark Ronson? Of course you do, he’s everywhere behind the scenes as a writer and producer, but after “Uptown Funk!”, he seems to appear on the charts spontaneously when you don’t expect it and I had no idea that he’d show up today with this single of all tracks that have been released from his upcoming album of the same name. He seems to have made a proper comeback as a solo or lead act with “Nothing Breaks Like a Heart” featuring Miley Cyrus, a worldwide smash, and his Silk City project with Diplo at the same time. Ronson appears to have kept the disco theme going on with this single featuring indie pop singer Lykke Li, who I’ve not heard much of outside her album last year and that song she did with Drake on So Far Gone; I’m excited to hear more from her though, what I have listened to seems promising. This is Ronson’s eleventh UK Top 40 hit as a credited artist and Lykke Li’s first ever charting song above her previous peak of #126, and it’s pretty okay. Lykke Li has one of my favourite voices in pop, so I’m glad her light falsetto tones within the chorus are reflected perfectly in the soft keys and relaxed instrumentation, with a 70s-influenced disco groove that I can really get into. The guitars are slick, even if they’re buried in the mix to make room for Lykke Li and the cloudy synths. I feel it doesn’t develop enough due to this actually, despite how funky the bassline is here, the percussion is somewhat stiff and while I like it, it feels like an inauthentic attempt at replicating this type of disco, and the repetitive backing vocals in the bridge are unnecessary in my opinion. The bridge that is essentially just the pre-chorus with the disco instrumentation replaced with heavy 808s is really cool, but there’s not enough of a climax after that. It just seems very... grey, if that makes sense. Very fitting for the album cover, but this isn’t for me, especially with the annoying “On and on” looped vocal introduced as a post-chorus, it gets on my nerves.
#35 – “Motorola” – Da Beatfreakz featuring Swarmz, Deno and Dappy
Produced by Da Beatfreakz
More UK faux-grime faux-dancehall hip hop, I see – except this is probably one of the best groups of these types of artists you could have, minus maybe a Tion Wayne or Hardy Caprio. Seriously, the names confuse me too. You may be familiar with Da Beatfreakz from their producer tag which appeared on Swarmz’s hit “Bally” – a song I actually loved, so that’s a good sign. Deno is Deno Driz’s new moniker, he had a pretty big hit with “Advice” which sadly peaked after the rapper collaborating with Deno on that song Cadet’s untimely death. Dappy, meanwhile, has more of a legacy after being in some group called N-Dubz in the 2000s; none of that stuff is good, honestly, all of their hits are pretty awful, but Dappy has grown a lot since and he’s actually competent now. This is Swarmz and Deno Driz’s second Top 40 hit, Da Beatfreakz’s first as a credited artist, and Dappy’s eleventh as a solo act. How does this track stack up then? Well, the beat is more tropical nonsense that sounds just like “Bally”, with an almost identical intro, but once that bass hits, the song actually picks up some menace and steam. The chorus is... interesting. It doesn’t have any of the charm that “Bally” had in its hook, which was killer, mostly because of the lack of a catchy melody. Deno sounds really good with his youthful 16-year-old voice on this beat, though, and I won’t say I don’t get a kick out of the vocoder added to Swarmz’s (admittedly pathetic, lazy and awful) verse, as well as the distant “skrrt, skrrt” ad-libs. Dappy is pretty cool, but I wish he did more with his flow, as he has the longest verse, and it gets pretty repetitive, but the mini-skit between the flow switches is actually pretty cool, albeit making the verse as a whole feel janky. Dappy and Deno adding ad-libs to the final chorus does make it feel a bit fuller and while I’m starting to feel Swarmz was a fluke, Dappy and Deno add a lot to this, which I didn’t expect, so I’m not going to be complaining if this ends up an urban hit – but it won’t, because it’s a posse cut that’s not even three minutes and is credited to the producer. I see these tracks all the time and they go nowhere.
#34 – “Falling like the Stars” – James Arthur
Produced by Bradley Spence and Alex Beitzke
Okay, I have a question. Why do we keep James Arthur on the charts again? His voice is gruelling, his instrumentation and production is consistently as generic as possible, with his sloppy singer-songwriter material never being engaging, unique or interesting. After his X Factor win, he had brief success, sure, but after rehab and a homophobic scandal, he came back and why are we letting him on? Everything he’s released since has been worthless chart filler made to appease radio, without any soul put into it, and whenever soul appears to shine in his vocals he sounds like Lewis Capaldi choking on a TARDIS. Don’t get me started on his squealing falsetto either. I’d argue Capaldi took his place until now but they have the same exact issues with me, I can’t stand either of them. That aside, this is his twelfth Top 40 single in the UK, and it’s the same crap. It’s got a more upbeat acoustic guitar jamble this time but Arthur is speaking pure clichés like this woman being the ocean carrying him home, and while this does feel sincere, it’s only due to how strained the voice is and not because the content deserves it. There’s a piano chord every few bars as well just so you notice that this isn’t just a cover of “Wonderwall” by your local aspiring guitarist, and incredibly fake strings that just sound painfully synthetic. Skip this, in fact, I’ll follow my own advice. I only listened to half of this song, so if it gets worse past the drowned out trap percussion in the bridge, tell me. Actually, don’t. Save me the pain.
#22 – “Greaze Mode” – Skepta featuring Nafe Smallz
Produced by Skepta
Nothing’s been great so far. Nothing’s even been all that good, mostly underwhelming or downright awful. So after all those new arrivals, I know who’s never going to disappoint me: Skepta. I love this dude, especially his more recent work that’s been influenced by trap, but he is or was largely a grime artist back in the day. He’s probably the biggest British rapper stateside due to cosigns and collaborations with Drake, Kanye and A$AP Rocky. I’ve only briefly heard of Nafe Smallz from another Top 40 hit he had here with Gunna, but I remember not liking him all too much so I’m wary of his contribution but with a Skepta beat under him, I’m sure it can’t be terrible. He released a double A-side single from his upcoming album, Ignorance is Bliss, and whilst the other song, “Bullet from a Gun”, barely missed the Top 40 at #42, “Greaze Mode” is Skepta’s twelth Top 40 hit and Nafe Smallz’s second, and while I definitely think this is a safe lead single, I’m not exactly saying it’s bad... except it is. Skepta’s delivery and charisma has always been painfully blunt, straightforward and aggressive, but here it sounds lazy and due to bad vocal mixing, I wouldn’t blame you if you forgot he was on this song. The beat has an eerie synth that doesn’t really click with me at all, with a nice sub-bass but it’s pretty much just any old trap beat, despite the brief flute-like flashes of cute synths and a haunting sub-bass. Nafe Smallz’s hook is really the weak link here, though, he has even worse vocal mixing and it is a painful performance, drenched in pointless reverb and autotune that succeeds in covering up nothing, with no wit or flow to his lyrics or content at all. He keeps the same flow for his whole verse and hook and it feels monotonous. This is a severe disappointment from Skepta, I’m sorry, but Nafe Smallz isn’t the only awful part about this. It’s also down to the beat, mixing and Skepta’s first verse (The third verse is remarkably more interesting), and, yeah, this fails on all regards.
#1 – “I Don’t Care” – Ed Sheeran featuring Justin Bieber
Produced by Max Martin, Shellback and Fred Gibson – Peaked at #1 in too many countries to list
“I Don’t Care”. What a fitting title for the lead single off of Ed Sheeran’s next album, No. 6 Collaborations Project, which I guess is some kind of mixtape where every song has a different rapper or featured singer on it? I don’t care enough to go into specifics, but this song reeks of not bothering with any detail. Sheeran didn’t produce this track at all as he usually does and he and Bieber have no chemistry, mostly because they both sound identical as they’re ripped of any unique tones they had to their voice in the first place. The song is about being at a party he doesn’t want to be at, but still being there because his girlfriend is there. Okay, cool, I don’t care, because he doesn’t make me believe it, especially with that pathetic falsetto “ooh-ooh” in the chorus, Jesus Christ, that’s so forced and unnecessary. The sloppy tropical beat straight out of 2016 has a painful vocal sample that really doesn’t fit in at this party of a song, except if this song is a party, then no one has got anything to say except, “Pass me another drink”, and “You’ve had enough”, your baby’s in the bathroom with some other dude who isn’t Ronald Weasley’s dad or looking like the Jonas Brothers if they were homeless, yet still isn’t one seventy-eighth as wealthy, and you’re stuck there crooning in manufactured autotune to someone who isn’t listening, and a DJ that’s playing Joy Division. It’s that depressing.
Conclusion
We know what’s coming next week: Tyler. But for now, what’s good? What’s bad? Well, Ed Sheeran and Justin Bieber take Worst of the Week for being absolutely worthless with “I Don’t Care”, whilst Dishonourable Mention is tied, going to both James Arthur and Skepta for “Falling Like the Stars” and “Greaze Mode” featuring Nafe Smallz. Best of the Week goes to... I’m seriously giving Best of the Week to Dappy?! Okay, well, he, Swarmz, Deno and Da Beatfreakz get Best of the Week for “Motorola”, and that song’s barely a 6 or 7/10, so I think we can call this a pretty pitiful week. Follow me on Twitter @cactusinthebank for more pop music ramblings and Top 20 rankings, and I’ll see you next week!
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Fic Rec Post:
I’ve had several people ask for this, so here’s a post made up of my personal Victuuri fic recs. I’ll keep adding to this btw and reblog it whenever I add more because it is SUPER DUPER incomplete.
Btw if I recommend one fic by an author, you can generally assume I rec their others. This is not always the case, but that’s what summaries and tags are for. I would definitely recommend checking out their other works though!!
Non-au:
And the answer is… by nessiesaur (Yuuri Katsuki is adorable, but also one of the most mature people in their class. Yuuri Katsuki is in her study group, which definitely saved her ass on the midterm. Yuuri Katsuki is…wait, who is he!?)
#4ContsFigure by animaginaryquill (An instagram feed of shenanigans at the Four Continents Competition )
like a design by jinlian (At twenty-five years old, Yuuri Katsuki makes his first Olympic team. This comes with its own set of responsibilities and questions, and a three-time Olympian husband only might be prepared to handle them. )
An Intangible Force of Motion by doeinstinct (The new season is in full-swing, and Viktor is realizing just how much work it is to coach and compete, but the exhilaration is worth it. The pain in his leg is probably just from overworking. Probably. )
begin to be half of what you think of me by kevystel (In which Yuuri's self-image finally starts aligning with reality. )
your love is my turning page by cityboys (Victor and the hours he spends waiting, reflecting and figuring things out. )
sight of the sun by cityboys (Wherein their honeymoon brings Victor face-to-face with a lot of firsts in his life.)
Now When Arrows Don't Penetrate, Cupid Grabs the Pistol by ken_ichijouji (dommific) ( Phichit Chulanont doesn't know how he ended up the skating world's wingman, but he ain't mad at it.)
The Happiest I've Ever Been by rainingover (The press conference is due to start in less than twenty minutes and they’re definitely going to be late if they don’t leave right away, but it’s proving impossible for Victor to leave the hotel. Completely and irrefutably impossible. It’s all Yuuri’s fault, of course)
Water's Edge by Mhalachai (For years, Yuuri had heard people say Viktor’s skating was otherworldly. He never thought they were being literal.)
Undertow by Mhalachai (Viktor Nikiforov has spent his entire life pretending to be normal.It's never enough. This is the sequel to Water’s Edge)
step into the golden dawn by Mayarene Rose (It’s still dark outside, only the first rays of sunlight beginning to peak out from behind the clouds. It’s a good thing to wake up to; a day just a few moments shy of being born. Or on what happens after.)
Night is Young and the Music's High by opalish ("Best press conference ever," the Japanese Nationals silver medalist says when asked. “Ten out of ten, would medal again.” "I would die for Katsuki-kun," Minami declares, with terrifying sincerity.)
Going for Gold by abarero (A series of character piece oneshots focusing on Yuuri Katsuki and his gold winning streak post-GPF.)
Let there be light, let there be light, let me be right by mooridayo (plane rides and train trips, from one country to the next, Yuuri and Victor watch the skies and track the growth of their relationship.)
an ever-fixed mark by katsukifatale (Yuuri is absolutely gorgeous. Viktor could write poems about the soft pink that paints his cheeks and nose. He could pen lyrics about the slope of Yuuri’s smile and the way he bites his lip to try to keep the laughter inside. The sparkle in Yuuri’s eyes would be enough to give hope to even the most lovelorn soul. The warmth of Yuuri’s body pressed against his and the bubbling heat of the feelings he induces in Viktor would be more than enough protection from even the harshest of Russian winters.Yuuri laughs again and ducks his head, embarrassed, and Viktor covers his mouth with his hand because he thinks he may have said some of that out loud. Oops.)
20 Days (of you and me) by totaldislocation ( The start of Yuuri and Victor’s life together in St. Petersburg isn’t what either of them was expecting but, in a way, it’s perfect )
he’s my sun, he makes me shine like diamonds by wingchestr ( Viktor and Yuuri move to St. Petersburg and can’t keep their hands off each other. )
when you can’t lift that weight (I will) by karasunotsubasa ( "Yuuri, I always thought I would end up alone,” he says and Yuuri feels a little bit like crying, too. )
AU or Canon Divergence:
My Hero, Yuuri by Abarero (At the age of 23, Yuuri Katsuki is certain he's just a dime-a-dozen hero that will never make a difference. Little does he know that the moment his path crosses with legendary hero, Victor Nikiforov, both of their lives will begin to change for the better.) [WIP]
Victor Effing Nikiforov by shysweetthing (AU in which Yuuri still doesn’t remember the banquet, somehow doesn’t blow Japanese Nationals, runs into Victor at the World Championships, and has absolutely no idea why his idol is suddenly friendly and incredibly handsy. )
Like a Fairytale by lucycamui (In which Prince Victor gets swept off his feet at a royal banquet and will go to any length to find his 'Cinderella' Yuuri. And Phichit is the fairy godmother who has no idea what he's doing )
all the world's a stage by braveten (Everyone has a guilty pleasure.For Yuuri, it just happens to be romance movies starring famous heartthrob Victor Nikiforov.)
how the mighty fall (in love) by braveten (Every Victor Nikiforov fan has three things in common.
1. They have unrealistic expectations for romance.
2. They mark their calendars with the dates of his newest book releases and the premieres of his latest movie adaptations.
3. They either passionately hate or love his greatest rival, a mysterious author whose pseudonym is only two letters: “KY.” )
To Boldly Go by xylophones (“Yuuri!” Viktor calls. “I’ve come to rescue you!”
Yuuri stares at him blankly. He gestures to the various unconscious space pirates with his recently discharged phaser.
“Oh, Captain,” he deadpans. “Save me.”
Or: A year in the life of badass science officer Yuuri Katsuki, Captain Viktor “Team Mom” Nikiforov, and simultaneously the best crew and worst crew in Starfleet history.)
This is now a series: Zero Gravity 'verse
a great desire to love by lily_winterwood (For some strange, inexplicable, fantastic reason, Yuuri Katsuki and Viktor Nikiforov are trading places. Kimi no Na wa AU.)
Of Dahlias and Deadlines by ingthing (All Victor wants is to get dahlias for Khloe and Brad's wedding in under 24 hours. Hope comes in the form of the little family florist in his neighborhood and the quiet smiles of one Katsuki Yuuri.) [WIP]
Open At The Touch by kiaronna (Maybe Nishigori got ahold of a lock of Viktor's hair, and some Polyjuice potion. Maybe it's all an elaborate prank. With this as his only reasonable explanation, he steps forward, snags Viktor by his robes and tugs him in.
"Nishigori," he says in Japanese, "this prank isn't funny. Your English is better than when I left, though.")
Love in Exile by martymuses (Once a well know ballet dancer in St. Petersburg, Victor Nikiforov finds himself exiled to Sakhalin Island as a political convict in 1881. As a man sentenced to katorga he will never return to European Russia or his life on the stage. Known as the "Edge of the World," his life on Sakhalin could not be further from the life he once knew. Strange circumstances lead his path to cross that of a young Japanese man, one of the very few still living on the island. Katsuki Yuuri leads a life of exile of a different kind, one that is largely self-imposed. Drawn to each other, despite their differences, something slowly begins to grow between them. When a narrowly avoided tragedy leaves them stranded together for a long, cold Sakhalin winter, they are challenged to face what their relationship really means, and what future it could possibly have.)
azure by ADreamingSongbird (Yuuri visits his boyfriend, admires some breathtaking scenery, and witnesses Durmstrang Institute's world-renowned star Quidditch player fall off his own broom, not necessarily in that order. (That last one may or may not be his fault, depending on who one asks.)
The Rules For Lovers by ADreamingSongbird (Prince Yuuri Katsuki has a duty to his country, above all else (his desires, his dreams, and his happiness included), and he knows this alliance will help to ensure the safety of his people. That’s the only reason he accepts Prince Nikiforov’s hand in marriage. The pleasant surprise, of course, is the part where they fall in love along the way. The unpleasant one, well…That’s a long story.)
cancel your reservations by renaissance ( Yuuri is a college student conducting private fencing lessons for a handsome, rich, and mysterious student. Viktor is not learning to fence because he does medieval reenactments. )
The League of the Green Carnation by Abarero (There was one golden rule to being a Time Scientist: do not bring home anything that was a fixed point in history. This meant most artifacts, extinct animals and the like were permissible. Historical figures? Not so much.
But what about an author? Namely, Yuuri’s favorite author, who was murdered in 1887. Could he be saved? Well. Yuuri was sure as hell about to find out.)
Drag Your Soul to Shore by Linneakou (Just before Katsuki Yuuri advances to his first-ever Grand Prix Final, the skating world is sent reeling when a stranger destroys resident champion Viktor Nikiforov’s life in more ways than one, resulting in him being banned from competing and gaining the hatred of everyone he knows. After a chance encounter in Sochi in which Yuuri saves his life, Viktor follows Yuuri back home to Hasetsu as the spring snows fall. But when Viktor is plagued by strange happenings and unnaturally bad luck, Yuuri quickly realizes that something supernatural is responsible for everything that has happened. The question is, can Yuuri save Viktor again, and more permanently this time?)
All Things Beautiful by StammiViktor (The voice is like bells, sharp and clear yet somehow infinitely soft. Warmth caresses Yuuri’s face and a shudder wracks his frozen frame.“You’re okay now. You’re safe.”(In the glacial waters near the North Pole, two worlds collide.)
On Your Every Word by StammiViktor (It starts, as most things do, with an extravagant banquet."Dance with me?"He’s holding out his hand. It’s an offering, an invitation, and a dare all in one.The onlookers part and a blinding smile graces the dancer’s lips.“Of course, Your Highness.”(A Royalty AU, with a twist))
The Elusive Vermilion Rose by Abarero (As the revolution builds in Larussia, a masked vigilante appears to whisk those destined for execution to safety. Not about to have his plans ruined, the king gives his two sons an offer they can’t refuse: discover this masked man’s identity if you wish to be heir to the throne.The youngest prince knows this is his only chance at the throne, while the older prince, Victor, finds himself caught in the middle; as his curiosity about the elusive Eros dances ever closer to affection.Meanwhile Yuuri Katsuki, a tailor from the neighboring country of Yamato, has been traveling back and forth more than usual... clearly because of the nobility clamoring to have the emperor’s own tailor make their clothes. And Yuuri and his three friends definitely don’t have anything to do with the so-called masked vigilantes in the Society of the Vermilion Rose. Nope, not at all.)
You can also check my fic rec tag for short fics I’ve reblogged!
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