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slashingdisneypasta · 4 years

Text

Hewitts / Pleasant Valley x Fem!Reader || Oneshot

Title: The Multiverse Theory and the Horror Fandom

Notes:

I don't really know what it is, but I enjoyed creating it, so I’m posting it! If I get an idea as to what might happen next, I’ll probably add a part two.

Its crack

Plot:

Okay, you are from this universe and you are your Slasher fucker self. But you’re transported from your home, to the universe that the Slashers live in, specifically 2003 Texas Chainsaw Massacre. They capture you of course and decide to keep you.

Now the Hewitt’s have decided to go on a roadtrip and are of course taking you, their hostage, with them.

They end up staying in Pleasant Valley, despite your warnings not to.

Warnings: Mention of real life people, breaking of the 3rd wall, if you look then there is some hints towards sexual assault cursing. Its comedy though mostly, so its pretty okay

~~~

“We’re lost.”

“No, mama, we not lost. We’re just taking the scenic route… “Hoyt transparently bullshits, looking around completely lost at the surroundings that we pass at a 100 km/h. Nothing but wheat fields and cows as far as the eye can see. Georgia is even more boring then Texas had been.

Luda Mae rolls her eyes, not taking any his shit after 6 hours in the car with him just today. God, I’m on her side. Can we stop somewhere just for a little bit? I mean, I don’t have to pee anymore since I held it for so long that the urge went away, but I’d still like to try because now I feel like I’m going to explode at any time. “So, we’re lost.” She announces, leaving no room for argument.

“Definitely lost… “Monty, in the seat beside me in the back seat of Hoyt’s tiny sheriff car, agrees with his sister, also watching the fields go by moodily. Why didn’t we take the goddamn truck, anyway? I would rather be tied to top of that, then squished back here between Thomas and Monty. I mean, there’s not even any doorhandles in the back here! Why did I have to be in the middle? Its not like I’m going to throw myself out the window! Sometimes I think Hoyt’s paranoid. And I hate him. And his ego’s too big.

Of course, Hoyt snaps back at Monty even though what he said was so mellow. It certainly didn’t have the amount of pent up frustration that Luda Mae’s had behind it. “We ain’t lost, goddamn it- Look! There’s a town. We’ll stop there and ask for directions if you really want. Just to make sure we’re going the right way, which I’m sure we are.” I look up from my hands, bruises all over the wrists from Hoyt and the ropes, and cuts all over the fingers from cooking with Luda Mae… and jagged fingernails from before I gave up. When I was still scratching at the walls and floor and Thomas, wanting to escape this mad family.

My fighting spirit isn’t completely crushed, now… but it has been a while since I screamed for help. I’m waiting for the moment, the right moment to try and escape. Of course, I don’t know if that moment will every come… but I still hope. And that’s something.

Now, looking up out the front window to see the town Hoyt’s talking about, I wonder if this will be the place that I’ll escape in.

Then we rush past the sign and I do a double take.

What did that say?!

I glance at Thomas, my designated warden to see what he’s doing now since he had been sleeping for most of today’s trip- yesterday he had stayed awake and alert, but today it seems that he decided I wasn’t about to crawl over anyone and creep through the window so it was cool to nap,- to see he’s alert, and when I look at him he turns to look at me back. I flash him a fake smile and turn to Monty, because he speaks. And he’s on the right side of the car, so he would have seen the sign.

“Hey, what did that sign say?”

“Why are they talking again?” Hoyt pipes up in the front as we get nearer to the town and I start to feel sick in my stomach. I raise my eyebrows at Monty instead of answering Hoyt’s goad.

Monty shrugs, leaning his back on his hand and looking out the window again. “Uh, Pleasant Valley.”

Oh my god.

It cannot be possible that more then one Horror movie exists in this world… right? I’ve been through enough trauma; I do not need to endure Robert Englund’s trademark craziness- oH, or Bill Mosely’s either. Oh god, - and his band of confederate lunatics. Do not do this to me, universe.

My heart’s beating faster then a bullet train as I wait, still as a statue and straight backed, for any more hints that I am where I think I am.

Thomas watches me with a hard stare, alert and suspicious about my odd change in posture and body language. I try to ignore him, which is of course hard, but I make do.

Then we start to pass people in this town, and they’re men in overalls and women in the most era-incorrect costumes I have ever seen. And they’re smiling and waving at us.

And I feel sick, and sink back into my seat so nobody outside can see me through Monty or Thomas, hopefully.

“Hoyt,” I call, quietly for the ‘sheriff’s’ attention. My voice doesn’t lift even to a normal volume, I’m so scared so he either ignores me or really doesn’t hear me. I try to be louder. “Hoyt!”

“Yes, hostage?”

“I think we’re going the right way as well; I saw sign on the road a few miles back that said so. We should just keep going.”

“What?!” Luda Mae turns in her seat to look at me furrow her eyebrows- she doesn’t believe me one bit. “What are you doing, slouching in the back like that? Sit up!”

“Are we stopping?”

“Uhh… “She turns to look at Hoyt, and he nods. “Looks like it. About time, too. I need to stretch my legs, and we obviously need those damn directions.”

“We do not need the- “Hoyt sighs, exasperated, then furrows his eyebrows as he focuses on something in front of the car. “What the fuck are these wackos all doing out there in the middle of the road? Get outta my way… “

Mow them over, Hoyt! MOW THEM OVER.

Of course, he slows to a crawl and then a stop, and I thank god that the back windows don’t open, lest I feel any more in danger. If they were open, I definitely would have feared scary ghost cannibals would stick in their hands. As it is, cross my arms and let Hoyt do the talking. Of course, I mean. What else could I do?

I can see full frontal the mess that we’re getting into, which once upon a time in a different world -my world. Oh, how I wish I was there right now, - would have been a good sign. Seeing Kane Hodder, Robert Englund and Lin Shaye and the ‘Guts and Glory Jubilee’ banner would be a sign I’m about to have a good night full of horror movie enjoyment and probably fanfiction as well. But now I see it and I wish to never watch that movie again, much like the Texas Chainsaw Massacre franchise.

Hoyt puts his hand on the car door handle next to him. “No, no, no, don’t get outta the car!” I exclaim, quietly and reaching to grab him back but he looks over at me, gives me a ‘I do what I want’ kind of look and then gets out of the car.

“Good afternoon, sheriff! Welcome to our Guts and Glory Jubilee! You’re our honoured guests!”

Oh, dear god.

Hoyt slams his car door shut and Luda and I wince at the sudden noise. “What the hell are you people doing out here in the middle of the road??! Me and my family are tryna get through here.”

“Aw, my bad sheriff! We’re just so tickled to have you with us this fine day!” Buckman doesn’t seem stirred that Hoyt’s clearly southern, and therefore ‘confederate’, like him, as far as he’s concerned which is what I was hoping for, so I decide to blow this whole situation out of water- I have no choice.

And what, in hell’s name, could I possibly lose at this point?

I lean forward in the car, keeping an eye on the scene, to talk to Luda Mae. “Hey, so this may be a bad time to mention this but, uh.” How do I break this news? “Well, I’m from a different universe. That multiverse noise? That’s real. Anyway, more importantly, I’m from a world in which you and your sons, and Monty, are just movie characters. Your movie is called ‘The Texas Chainsaw Massacre’, Thomas is the Texan Chainsaw guy and he is called Leatherface.” Luda’s slowly turning her head to look at me like have 7 eyeballs. I keep talking through, quickly ad feverishly, desperate. “I know it sounds crazy, and you can ask me any question about ya’ll’s passed if you want as proof but just get your son back in this car please. This place also has its own movie, and its even less pretty then what goes on in your house.” I look pleadingly at her, hoping to God, by some miracle she believes me.

“Sit back down!! I’ve been in a car with 3 sweatin’, stinky men for 6 hours now today and I am in no mood for your stories.” She turns back in her seat. “God.”

“Oh Jesus, you said it… “ I whine, plopping back down in my seat, looking at Hoyt and Buckman who have now met in front of the car and aren’t yelling at each other across the road and immediately assume the fucking confederate mayor is successfully feeding the fucking fraudulent sheriff’s ego, and drop my face into my hands. A few minutes pass, and I stay like this, occasionally making frustrated crying sounds without really crying, and getting annoyed groans and ‘shut up’s from Monty beside me, until a hit to the car jolts me up. “What! What? What’s happening- are they attacking!?”

Everyone who heard, ignores me and I see it’s just Hoyt coming around the car opening Thomas’ side. Oh god, breeze has neve felt so terrifying. “Come on out, family. We’re stayin’ the night! I can’t tolerate settin’ in this car with you people anymore.” On no. No, no, no. STAYING?

Thomas gets out and Luda Mae follows, opening Monty’s door for him and letting him out onto his wheelchair that Thomas gets out of the trunk for him and unfolds. I cross my arms and stay inside. When Hoyt realises this, he leans down to peer inside the car at me and thrusts a thumb to point behind him. Slowly, menacingly he drawls. “Get out of this car.”

Oh, what is he going to do? What could he possibly do that he hasn’t already done to me.

I stubbornly look away. “You said family, I’m not family. I’m not leaving this car, no way. You can’t make me.”

“You wanna bet, sugar?”

He reaches in, wraps a calloused hand around one of my arms and starts pulling me until I topple out of the car, into the dirt. He lets go of me and immediately slams the car door closed again so I don’t slither back in.

“Fuck.” I mutter, glaring up at him from the floor. He locks the car in front of my eyes.

“Now, when you’re feeling more like an adult and not a child, you can come on to our room- that building over there. “ I feel like running after him when he walks off to the building, but before I can get myself out of the dusty, beige dirt, a hand enters my vision and I follow it up and scream on the inside. Mayor George Fucking Buckman.

He smiles so charmingly… you could nearly believe he isn’t depraved. Then I see the eyepatch and I’m reminded. “Would you let me help you up outta the dirt, little miss?”

Mmmm, I guess.

Best to stay on his good side, I think as I take his hand and he hauls me up. I don’t want to be on the receiving end of one of those glares that the whole town like to take part in with him. Noooo thank you. Not for me.

“Thank you.” I say quickly, looking to get out of there and find the Hewitt’s. They’ve all disappeared into the building Hoyt went towards a moment ago now. I brush the dirt off my pants and then clap my hands off of each other to get rid of the dirt that’s on them now, and any remnants of feeling Buckman’s hand, then flash a tight smile in Buckman’s general direction and escape towards the building.

They have to listen to me!

I burst into the place and see Thomas trailing behind the rest of that devil family down a hallway and run down there. “Thomas!” I pant, because that was a long hallway. Where are we now?! The Overlook hotel!?! “Thomas, what kind of warden are you? Please, don’t you ever leave me alone with that man ever again!” Thomas narrows his eyes suspiciously at me above his normal, leather mask -Luda and Hoyt had decided before we left their murder mansion that the human flesh mask would probably not fly in normal society, so he swapped it in for the old one,- then nods in front of him for me to walk there where can watch, and I gladly go there.

___TIME SKIP: A couple hours later___

All day, I have been trying to persuade the Hewitt’s that I’m not from here. I described Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning in explicit detail, including of course the Sheriff Hoyt thing, the Eric/Dean confusion, Bailey, Monty’s legs being chainsawed off… I even recruited some comic book information about Hoyt’s time in the Prisoner of War Camp and Sargent Chow, but they just think I’m a stalker now.

I mean, why the fuck not? Why wouldn’t I stalk these freaks? Truly, being around them has been a joy filled time.

I don’t throw back at my face that I watched their movies religiously, readers. That’s was when I thought they were fictional! (Yeah, I know you’re there reading this. This sure feels like a fanfiction to me, and as a fangirl, I’m an expert.)

So, I’ve decided I have one more option. One more chance to survive.

Hopefully this doesn’t go worse then plan A did.

Through pretending like the rope around my wrists was too tight when Hoyt tied me up by the hands to his bed frame, when really in truth it was a bit loose, I manage to make him think I’m stuck for the night. So, when he falls asleep – I know he’s asleep because he snores like a feral racoon… that also has rabies… (He drools) – I carefully, quietly, I struggle out of the ropes and carefully put them on the floor. Then turn to the window.

We’re on the second level of this building, but the possibility of a broken bone or two will not deter me from getting out of this mess. Especially since Thomas is waiting in the hallway outside this room for any sign of me trying to escape and getting hurt from falling out of a window is much preferred to meeting the business end of his chainsaw.

Not that I’ll be out of danger when I get out… as I’ll still be in Pleasant Valley… but I will have completed Level 1 at least.

Opening the window, I wince and look back at Hoyt to make sure the gentle rubbing sound the window makes against the frame doesn’t wake him, then turn back and immediately get to crawling out. Once I have succeeded in getting onto the ledge I hold on to the gutter - hoping beyond hope that it’s sturdy, - and reclose the blinds and push the window closed as well again. Covering my tracks.

Then I start the perilous journey down the building, which somehow, I succeed in! When I finally drop down on the dirt again and turn around though, I nearly out loud this time. “Miss Shaye! -“I stop myself, making an ‘Oop’ sound. You would think I would stop making these mistakes- I have been tortured and keep prisoner by the Hewitt family. Certainly not the late R. Lee. Ermey or Andrew Bryniarski either. The Hewitt’s. - But alas, I am still making this mistake apparently. “Sorry, you remind me of someone else!” I smile at Granny Boone, who must have been standing there watching the whole time I conquered the hotel building, stands with her hands on her hips and one eyebrow purposely halfway up her forward. She’s waiting for an explanation. “I didn’t want to wake up my family, and its time for the midnight stroll. Couldn’t sleep!”

My heartbeat races in my chest, because I have every confidence that this woman could kill me with her bare hands if she doesn’t like my answer. For a few moments, she makes me wait as she does looks at me suspiciously like Thomas. Oh god, are you going to eat me or not, ghost lady!?

“Oh, well that’s very considerate of you! Could I join you on your walk? I’m in the same boat.”

Oh, for fudges sake.

I smile politely though, and we start walking side by side down the middle of town. Silence hangs between us, but as we walk, I start to think this could work. I was planning on finding Buckman and telling him my story to see if he would believe me and do something because this whole town is supernatural and hard to believe, but I actually think this may have worked out in my favour! Maybe. He’s a sexist, chauvinistic bigot. But at the very least Boone’s a woman like me, with less of a boner for authority so hopefully she’ll at least listen. So… maybe…?

“So… “I start, sounding loud since it’s so quiet out here. “Can we talk? Woman to woman? I don’t know, you just seem trustworthy!” Oh, puke. What am I saying? “Sorry if I’m out of line, but… something crazy’s going on in my life.”

“Oh, trust me. I know crazy.” I side eye her as she smirks ‘mysteriously’. Oh, I know you know crazy, lady. I know. I know it all. You know crazy intimately. “Uh but go on. Sure thing. What kind of good Christian lady would I be if I didn’t bend an ear to our esteemed special guests?”

… Uhuh.

Well, okay! Works for me. “Thank you.” I clap my hands together. “Well. It started a month ago now, I guess… Haven’t really been able to keep up with time. First, I should probably explain the multiverse theory…”

#Oneshot #Horror x Reader #Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2003 #texas Chainsaw massacre: The beginning #2001 Maniacs #Sheriff Hoyt #Charlie Hewitt #Luda Mae Hewitt #Monty Hewitt #Thomas Hewitt #Granny Boone #Mayor Buckman #x Reader #Horror Oneshot #Slashers

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tenshibeth1 · 4 years

Text

Choose a character and a prompt, and I shall write a small, unconnected drabble. :3

Characters: Thomas Hewitt (TCM the Beginning), Junior/Bubba Sawyer (TCM 3), Jason Voorhees (Ft13th 2009 Remake), Michael Myers (Halloween 2007, disincluding sequel), Brahams Heelshire, Severus Snape, male Yautja, Hannibal Lector, The Phantom (of the Opera, Eric, 2004 film version), Pyramid Head (movie version), Sweeny Todd, Sesshoumaru, or Alastor (Hazbin Hotel).

Prompts:

1) "I thought I would never see you again..."

2) "Let me take care of you."

3) "You need to rest now, don't move."

4) "You could've died, you know..."

5) "I don't care if you don't want my help, I'll do it anyways!"

6) "You know I'm always here for you, right?"

7) "You're not okay."

8) "Here, let me clean your wounds..."

9) "Why did you do that?! Tell me!"

10) "I screwed up."

11) "If you want me, come and get me!"

12) "If I could, I would kiss away all of your scars."

13) "Look, I know we don't know each other that well, but I'm still worried about you. No one deserves to be alone."

14) "I feel like I got hit by a car... Wait...I did? It was your car?"

15) "Please put me down, it's just a sprained ankle..."

16) "So what if I broke my arm? I'm still doing it."

17) "Please look at me..."

18) "I'm just disappointed."

19) "Why are you so stubborn?"

20) "Please don't misunderstand, but..."

21) "Am I too late?"

22) "I'll sleep when I'm dead!"

23) "I'll do this if it kills me!"

24) "Hey, hey, hey! I've got you...I've got you."

25) "I'm fine! You're the one with bullet holes!"

26) "I don't know...I've never seen [insert slasher name here] like this before..."

27) "I will not be the one who slows us down."

28) "It just feels like...everyone forgot I even exist..."

29) "Are you...wearing my shirt?"

30) "I can't believe you dragged me into this..."

31) "You're jealous...aren't you?"

32) "Is this how little you think of me?"

33) "Did it ever occur to you...that you're hurting me, too?"

34) "Why weren't you there?"

35) "I'm fine. Stop asking."

36) "How long has it been since you've slept?"

37) "You're burning up..."

38) "Because nobody cares about me!"

39) "Because I care about you!"

40) "Please...don't leave me..."

41) "Hey...just look at me. Breathe."

42) "I heard you scream...nightmares again?"

43) "I...I don't know where I am. Help me..."

44) "That's a lot of blood..."

45) "How are you still standing?!"

46) "I can't feel my fingers anymore..."

47) "It reminded me of you."

48) "You might not like this..."

49) "May I have this dance?"

50) "I made your favorite."

51) "I'll wait."

52) "Here, try some."

53) "One more chapter..."

54) "Don't worry about me."

55) "Close your eyes and hold out your hands."

56) "My mind is a dark place...you don't want to be there."

57) "I just want to be numb. I don't want to feel anything."

58) "I can't give up on you, so please don't give up on yourself!"

59) "This isn't anything like how I imagined it..."

60) "Stop laughing at me."

61) "Go ahead- rip my heart out."

62) "I-I'm not afraid of thunder, that's silly--!!"

63) "Hold this, I'm gonna go kick his ass."

64) "It's two in the morning...that's enough of that."

65) "I was kidding!"

66) "How long have you been standing outside?"

67) "...That's where that went."

68) "Did you...did you just throw that at me..?"

69) "I always knew you'd find me...I just didn't think it'd be like this."

70) "Were you ever going to tell me?"

#prompt #challenge #writing #writing prompts #characters #interesting situations #i need mini unconnected drabbles to keep me sane #halp

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madameocotillo · 5 years

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Haunted house stories please?

HAHA oh man, sure!! This was not something I really expected to be asked after I tag-talked about it lol, but I have plenty to share.

A preface: I was at House of Torment in Austin, Tx for 6 years, until I moved cities, and was a floor manager for 5 of those. What this means is I was in costume every night, but instead of being in a single scene like most actors, I got to run around a huge portion of the haunt. I took care of the actors in my zone, while also checking on/fixing props, dealing with problem customers (MANY of these, but all the managers had radios w/ earpieces & were kept updated constantly by the control room staff monitoring the night vision cameras in almost every room), and scaring everyone else. Being a manager, I had a lot more......leeway in what I could do, namely dangerous stunts and shit that scene actors were not permitted to do for legal reasons.

Worth a mention as well; I have always been an athletic dumbass with a high degree of flexibility and pain tolerance, so let’s start with that as a baseline. This is long, so i’ll just start with one! I may reblog it to add more later though.

CHAINSAW TAG: An upgraded children’s game w/ 120% more terror.

Picture this: It’s 1am, and the building is closed & empty. The actors have gone home, the music is off, and the bright house lights are dark. You are alone, creeping along in the dim glow of the operating lights, using your familiarity with the terrain to keep as silent as you can, while also avoiding stumbling over the uneven floor as you strain your ears to catch any sounds not generated by you.

Over the thud of your own heartbeat, you hear something: careful steps coming up the stairs several rooms behind you; whomever is making them is obviously trying to remain as unnoticed as you are, but doesn’t know enough to skip over the top two steps, which always groaned under pressure.

There’s no way to know who is behind you, and the risk of staying to find out isn’t worth it. There are a few hiding places you know of in your vicinity, and the one that is better than all the rest is also unfortunately the most difficult to get into swiftly AND quietly. You make your choice, and straighten up to begin trying to unlatch the cabinet door that actually contains a small passage onto a metal ledge, hanging 20ft above the floor below, with a large, heavy, hinged grate that actors can push over to scare customers with its deafening crash. The cabinet hinge squeaks loudly if opened too fast, you know, so you pick the slow and stealthy option. This was a mistake; you are TOO slow.

There aren’t quiet steps behind you anymore, because now they are advancing rapidly, with heavy footfalls. The unmistakable sound of a cord being pulled several times, an engine starting, and by the time they burst into the doorway of your room, the chainsaw in their hands is revved and roaring.

Your heartbeat goes haywire, and your mouth goes dry as adrenaline kicks in like a shotgun blast. Silence be damned, you rip the cabinet door open, climb onto the counter, and hurl your body forward through the 2ft entrance as the person, still dripping with the blood they wore that night while out on the lot, terrifying customers to take their minds off the line, lunges for you with a shriek. You ARE fast enough this time, the cabinet door bangs shut and the latch re-engages behind you, but the chainsaw-wielder is just as aware as you are of the tiny ledge, with no exit but the way you came, that you are now perched on. You hear them start to fumble with the latch.

Heartbeat still thundering, you smile. You don’t expect them to know this, but this area happens to be one of your favorite spots in the building for three reasons.

1) It’s a part of your zone, you have spent hundreds of hours patrolling it over the course of the season, and you are very, very comfortable in it.

2) After the grate is pushed over by an actor, and the resulting noise causes the customers beneath to drop to the floor, hands over their ears, screaming like they think the world is ending, they always recover and look up to see what made it. Through the metal mesh of the ledge, they can see the actor that scared them, the grate, and you as well if you’re there that time. Usually one person laughs at the rest of the group, and they make to continue down the hall, content that the monsters are two stories up and cannot reach them.

3) As mentioned before, you are a gigantic dumbass with the impulse control of a particularly acrobatic toddler.

The sets in this building are movie-grade, meant to take abuse from staff and guests alike, and built to facilitate the high-intensity scares your company is known for. This means almost everything is weight-bearing, baby.

The would-be killer gets the cabinet door open just in time to see you roll off the edge of the platform, slowing your decent to the concrete below by pushing off the metal sewage pipes that jut from the wall to enhance the atmosphere. Ricocheting all the way down to the ground floor, instead of rushing forward like you normally would, at the practically incoherent group you just landed a few feet in front of, you race off at full speed down the hallway, while the thwarted maniac calls down that you’re a bag of dicks, and they’re going to go eat the half-sandwich you left in the break room.

This my friend, is Chainsaw Tag!! Only played by management & equivalent level staff, after the haunt was closed for the night, it was a dangerous, no-holds barred, showdown-survival match between a bunch of people trying to ‘survive’ as long as they could, and one with a real chainsaw (minus chain, jesus christ we weren’t trying to actually kill someone) & a desire to give their friends minor heart attacks. Haunted house employees are not known for their strong survival instincts.

People ask me a lot, “Why do you hate horror movies, if you love horror video games and work in a haunted house??” The answer to that is, IT’S A TOTALLY DIFFERENT BALLGAME IF I CAN PERSONALLY INFLUENCE THE OUTCOME OF THE SITUATION. The experience of having, as far as your brain is concerned in the moment, a real person with a chainsaw hunting you down is unlike anything I can possibly think to compare it to; you instinctively go into a genuinely terrified state, it doesn't matter how logically you know that the asshole stalking you with a chainsaw isn’t really going to kill you, you promised to buy him Wendy’s on the way home, the second you start to doubt that the sounds you are hearing are coming from a fellow ‘victim’ your brain is already off and doing its thing. When a chainsaw starts up in the dark, one room away, you run, but most importantly, YOU CAN CHOOSE EVERY DECISION YOU MAKE TO TRY TO KEEP YOURSELF ‘ALIVE’ THAT MATCH, THERE IS NO WAITING AROUND KNOWING THAT WHATEVER HAPPENS TO YOU IS GONNA HAPPEN BECAUSE THAT’S THE WAY THE DIRECTOR SHOT IT.

We didn’t play every night, and sometimes games lasted until the sun rose, before we all trudged off to try to make it through classes/daytime jobs, but MAN was it worth it. I feel like i’ve actually got some honest to goodness experience surviving a slasher movie lol, and as long as I knew the terrain and was lucky, I might actually survive. The building we were in at the time was 40,000 square feet, and most of it was the extremely intricate haunted house, so there were a ton of choices players could make in how they hid, where they hid, if they took a stationary approach or a more active one, the way I did, et cetera.

The building also used to be an old warehouse, complete with steel beams criss-crossing the length of the ceiling, and if you think I didn’t hang like a bat from them, 40 ft above the ground in an open area that didn’t have any false floors, with a flashlight in hand so that as soon as I spotted the person who was ‘It’ I could switch it on and make a godawful Dracula impression at them, you would be thinking wrong.

I have thought before that if I owned/had access to some wooded land, or a building that was built up in a way to make it fun, I would love to run my own game of Chainsaw tag with friends. There really is nothing else that can come close as far as the rush you get when playing it, much less surviving till the end of the round and getting to laugh at the dumb ways your friends ‘died’. Of course people snuck off to make out, and YES they totally did get caught & killed with MUCH more frequency than those of us who knew better, that’s like one of the basic tropes of horror movies, good god.

And yes, the chainsaw wielder DID have to touch you with the chainsaw in order to tag you out, and there were no safe zones (that were respected, anyways).

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doll-in-the-walls · 5 years

Text

Horror Movie Reviews

This is a redo of my post on my main, minus the gifs that way I can make it as long as I want. That being said, this post gets long. Not in any order really though towards the end it’s in order of me watching or remembering movies I’ve seen.

Keep in mind: These are just my personal opinions/reviews.

Rating Key - Pumpkins

🎃🔶🔶🔶🔶 - HATED IT

🎃🎃🔶🔶🔶 - Really didn’t like it but it wasn’t that horrible

🎃🎃🎃🔶🔶 - It was decent. Neutral. No strong opinion.

🎃🎃🎃🎃🔶 - Really liked it but probably wouldn’t watch it again.

🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃 - LOVED IT. 10/10. Would watch again. (Probably already have)

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Halloween (1978)

🎃🎃🎃🔶🔶 3/5 Pumpkins

It was very slow to me. Didn’t seem to really get going until the last 10-20 minutes. I don’t like movies that do ADR honestly but it’s to be expected from older movies. It was a nice start to the series. Don’t hate it. Ending definitely worked to make me watch the next one.

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Halloween II (1981)

🎃🎃🎃🎃🔶 (4/5 Pumpkins)

Not sure why but I liked this one better even though I didn’t get answers to most of my questions. More action, some VERY nice camera shots (in my opinion) and cool lil moments that make you gasp.

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Halloween The Curse of Michael Myers (1995)

🎃🎃🔶🔶🔶 (2/5 Pumpkins)

I left with even more questions and very few answers… Looks much better effects/fake wound wise though.

I was super happy to see Paul Rudd. Nice surprise, I didn’t know he was in it.

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Freddy vs Jason (2003)

🎃🎃🎃🎃🔶

Very enjoyable to watch. (I of course was rooting for Jason the whole time. Just not a fan of Freddy). Didn’t need to watch either original movie/series to understand the two. (I’ve only seen parts of Nightmare on Elm Street, and honestly never watched Friday the 13th.)

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The Boy (2016)

🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃 (5/5 Pumpkins)

I LOVE Brahms and CAN’T WAIT for the sequel. Movie kept me guessing and shocked me at the end (I was pleasantly shocked). The scares weren’t too in your face and the movie kept me interested the whole time. Definitely going to watch again.

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House of Wax (2005)

🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃 (5/5 Pumpkins)

Loved it. I’ve already watched multiple times. I feel so bad for Vincent (pretty much any mask man from horror movies I seem to love. Idk why). Loved the effects and set/props (wax stuff obviously lol). Never really liked the opening scenes though, I’d rather we get right to the House of Wax but understand it’s necessary.

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Child’s Play/ Chucky Movies [1-6] (1988-2013)

🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃 (5/5 Pumpkins)

(I’m going to do each one at some point so grouping these all together just for now).

I’ve rewatched these so much. I find 4 (Bride of Chucky) and 5 (Seed of Chucky) more funny than scary honestly.

Though no idea what they were thinking after that, the one after Seed is no good in my opinion. They should have ended it after Seed. BUT (See below)

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Cult of Chucky (2017)

🎃🎃🎃🎃🔶 (4/5 Pumpkins)

Watched this only cause it was on Netflix and I gotta say it wasn’t that bad. I actually loved the ending though I’m usually one for happy endings. Probably wouldn’t watch it again but it was better than the one before

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The Lost Boys (1987)

🎃🎃🎃🎃🎃 (5/5 Pumpkins)

Love it so much I have it on DVD. Watched it as a kid and never found it too scary but it that’s just cause I fell in love with the characters.... Love Kiefer Sutherland. Didn’t care for any of the sequels.

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Friday the 13th (1980)

🎃🎃🔶🔶🔶 (2/5 Pumpkins)

It’s one of those that was probably super scary at the time it came out. I was between 2-3 Pumpkins for the rating. 1) I knew who the killer was. Hard to avoid spoilers when the movie came out in the 80s 2) I could figure out who survived 3) I like the acting by “Alice” but “Marcy” and “Annie” (omfg).... don’t get me started on Annie.

I am however excited to see the next one. Gimmie some Jason.

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Friday the 13th Part 2 (1981)

🎃🎃🎃🎃🔶 (4/5 Pumpkins)

Liked it much better than the first. Acting was better. I like how this (like Halloween II) basically showed the ending of the first movie as a reminder (though I didn’t like that it was shown as a nightmare Alice had) And I had a few issues. 1) MUFFIN 2) WHERE’S PAUL? (What was real? What was a dream?)

I also have played the Friday The 13th The Game and it was cool to see one of the maps and basically one of the challenges kill for kill. I didn’t know the challenges were based off the movies, I knew the maps were.

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Friday the 13th - Part III (1982)

🎃🎃🎃🎃🔶 (4/5 Pumpkins)

I liked this one but was left with questions that I don’t know if I missed the answer or what.

Idk how I feel about them changing Jason’s face. Part 2 his face was half deformed (and he had hair!) And now suddenly it’s his whole face and he’s bald. (which, don’t get me wrong, I don’t care what he looks like. I’m just confused as to why they changed it.)

Again cool to see a place the game has as a map (I knew what rooms were what lol) and again how certain people died. And now that kill in the barn (in game not movie) makes sense to be called a revenge kill.

Can’t wait to watch the next one.

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Friday the 13th The Final Chapter (1984)

🎃🎃🎃🎃🔶 (4/5 Pumpkins)

First off…. Yay tiny Cory Feldman. Second … WHAT THE WHAT?! So I liked this one and only had a few problems with it. Namely.. I thought Jason only killed people who we teens/“being bad”/on his land. The family of three had to have been there during the 3rd movie, it was only like a day after the end of that one. I think he shouldn’t have killed the only blonde mom (maybe he doesn’t trust anyone who looks like his mom anymore). And the kid did nothing

WHICH BRINGS ME TO TOMMY. (Who I didn’t know was a kid in the movies…) Why and how did him making himself look like a young Jason work? A simple “he moved” would have assured his sister he wasn’t going insane. And also, what did Jason possess him at the end?? (Or was it just to show he’d grow up to like hacking people?)

And my last problem was… Why did the “peace” girl have to die?! She wasn’t doing anything!

Also … Trish… Why didn’t you just jump over that body…you did going back. Anyway I liked it. (XD)

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Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The beginning (2006)

🎃🎃🎃🎃🔶 (4/5 Pumpkins)

Well right off the bat I want to hug Thomas and never let go. (I also want to maim everyone who insults him and calls him the R word. I really HATE that word). Honestly didn’t know about the whole cannibal aspect to the movie(s) I just knew about the face wearing. “Hoyt” gave me the fucking creeps but I did like how he defended Thomas in the beginning. I still have to watch the movie that came before this and the originals (Where his name isn’t Thomas apparently. I like it as Thomas) but Thomas has been added to the list of Slashers I like.

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Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2

🎃🎃🎃🔶🔶 (3/5 Pumpkins)

This one was meant to be a dark comedy, which I can see how but yikes...

I watched this one before the first one just because I heard that he ends up liking a girl in it and I love Bubba so I wanted to see that. Now I know where the “Wiggles” gif comes from. I find him so adorable even though he makes the girl wear a face… I like him a bit better than the one in the first movie only cause we see more of him not just chasing someone. I’m a sucker for anything even slightly romantic.

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Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)

🎃🎃 🔶 🔶 🔶(2/5 Pumpkins)

I honestly started it and stopped it so much just cause I was bored... I kinda knew what happened so maybe that had something to do with it but for most of the movies I knew what was gonna happen, this one just kept loosing me anyways.

One of those movies that makes you wanna scream at the victims for how stupid they were. Who goes up to a house and after not getting a response the first five or so times GOES INTO THE HOUSE. That’s trespassing and STUPID.

I really both loved and hated the way Sally screamed the ENTIRE time she ran. It really made her sound actually terrified but also...if he lost sight of her it wouldn’t matter cause he could just follow the screams.

I prefer Thomas’ family better cause they’re not as mean to him...

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Scream (1996)

🎃🎃🎃🎃🔶 (4/5 Pumpkins)

I had seen Scary Movie, which is a spoof/parody of this movie, so even if I didn’t already know who Billy was I would’ve known who the killer(s) was. Probably actually scary for its time but also I don’t personally get too scared by horror movies like this. Billy is very yummy though…

Took me forever to realize where I knew Stu from… The live action Scooby-Do movies… XD

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Jason Lives Friday 13th Part VI (1986)

🎃🎃🎃🎃 🎃 (5/5 Pumpkins)

Okay.. just reading the lil blurb on Show Box… TOMMY DID WHAT NOW? How do you accidentally… I’m just gonna watch the movie…

Was it supposed to be as funny as it was? XD The whole thing could’ve been avoided if Tommy just didn’t stab his body during a storm. (Also... Tommy is very yummy, omg)

I would honestly watch it again just because it’s so funny and I don’t mind looking at Tommy.

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The Babadook

🎃🎃🎃🎃 🎃 (5/5 Pumpkins)

I loved this. Technically a “drama/thriller” but damn some scenes got me. I loved the meaning behind it all and would definitely watch it again.

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Working on watching more movies. Below is what I still need to watch.

Friday the 13th A New Beginning (1985)

(which apparently isn’t even Jason so I’m probably going to skip it)

Friday the 13th Part VII The New Blood (1988)

Friday The 13th Part VIII Jason Takes Manhattan (1989)

(What is he, a giant monster like Godzilla now?)

Jason Goes to Hell The Final Friday (1993)

Jason X (2001)

Halloween (2007)

Halloween II (2009)

Scream 2 (1997)

Scream 3 (2000)

Scream 4 (2011)

House at the End of the Street (2012)

Probably a ton more I need to see but that’s all I can think of for now. Got a movie suggestion? Lemme know.

#horror movies #slasher boys #movie reviews #horror reviews

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