I think the difference between nimona (comic) and nimona (film) is that the comic is so much more about being mentally ill and the film is so much more about being queer. don't ask me why just know it

Will my suffering never cease

- went to good Friday evening service even tho it's not a day of obligation, didn't go yesterday evening to Maundy Thursday for a variety of reasons

- priest manages to fit homophobia and transphobia into his sermon. Not even gay marriage. Just unions, that let ppl share taxes and have hospital visiting rights. And big bad scary surgery. Like. Completely unrelated to the matter at hand. Says SO LITTLE abt the Passion, managed to talk for 10 minutes without really saying ANYTHING. Takes Pilate's 'what is truth' and instead of engaging in the long philosophical and theological discussion around that question, decides to use it as a rallying cry against wokeism and a godless progressive society.

- my two ex best friends were there. Ran into them. + One's husband, who I introduced her to a decade ago. Like I'm mostly over that, no longer shitty and resentful, fully know that it was partially my fault and born from my own terribleness at 19 and undiagnosed untreated mental illness. Still uhhh hurts tho??? As a reminder?

- music bad. Ok I'm petty. I'll give the trads (1) point. I don't like guitar mass. I will NOT agree with the trads in assigning moral weight to my aesthetic preference. It's simply a preference, which does not make any musical form inherently superior to the others. But the triduum really lends itself to Latin hymns and chants, in my heart. My other fave church music is traditional Black spirituals. I would greatly prefer either. But just. If it sounds like an acoustic version of a pop love song. I just. I can't. I KNOW I'm the weird about Jesus romantically girlie. But I am not vibin with this folks

Literally would have simply Walked Out. Hit da bricks during the homily. But was with my family so 1) cannot out myself 2) did not have house keys on me, so I was suck regardless

Anyway I said I wasn't going to do fun things today but I'm so upset and cranky and I did chores all day, I am going to catch up on dungeon meshi. Marcille is my best favourite cringefail girl I'm obsessed with her and surely the wlw neurotic fussy mage who loves her friends will not betray me like this

actually idc I’m fucking pissed about redlyn breaking up just so they could end up in same sex relationships as a bi person I LOVED seeing these two realize that they’re bi but they loved each other and were in a m/f relationship and they just immediately stripped that away again and it just leaves such a bad taste in my mouth

Ok but the fortune teller guy in the past, telling Palm and Nueng about all the struggles that they face being a gay couple back then including how they can't get married and start a family and then Nueng talking about how they can't be open about their relationship due to the conservatives in charge...... I see you P'Jojo I know what you're doing

imagine being this wrong so loudly

have been reading fic & thinking abt my relationship to fic, which is of course also among other things a mirror of my relationship to my own psyche, and like—i think all the discourse abt its being ~internalized misogyny~ to mostly/entirely read m/m is not ultimately, whatever the truth of it, all that helpful, either to readers or to Women! but of course that doesn't stop me from feeling weird guilt abt the fact that i don't read more f/f than i do, because if there's anything i love to do, it's feel unhelpfully bad abt myself on the slimmest of pretexts…

however! i did end up reading some f/f earlier, specifically transfem f/f, and it got me thinking—basically what i'm usually mostly reading fic for is the romance/sex, right? like, don't get me wrong, i love when a fic gives me a gorgeous double helix of, like, casefic and romance twisted together, that's ideal, but fundamentally most of the time the feeling up is what i sat down at the table to eat. so in a complex aegosexual way it's a fantasy i'm—not projecting onto, exactly, i don't want to be one of the people in it; but, like, lurking in the wings of with eyes big love-crumbs, to steal a phrase from a relevantly-named poet. :) and so it's no wonder that mostly i don't want to read cisfemme4cisfemme stuff, because that's not a dynamic that feels like it has any room for me, or even like i'm particularly welcome in the room. but like. if it's trans women? i'm there, i love that for them and for me. if there's a butch? i might get tripped up by our differing lenses on gender feelings and stub my toe a little but even so i'm probably here for it. (thinking here abt that one butch/femme geraskier ~cisswap which is, like, a gorgeous bruise i keep periodically pressing. <3)

so really it's just like. shocker: i'm not personally moved by fantasies abt romance which feature conventionally feminine cis women whom i don't personally find relatable or sexually desirable! and when i put it like that, it really instantly dissolves the weird useless discourse-induced guiltgunk. like. give me a woman who's, idk, tall and charismatic and strong and clever and talented at something (though honestly it's like that siken revised tweet, a lot of those characteristics are ultimately negotiable!), like women i've historically crushed on irl, and then give me a pairing for her that's like. another woman who's also enough of those things, or a man who's—honestly the kind of m/f i'm open to would be its own whole post bc holy shit am i fussy, it very much does exist but for now let's just stick a pin in that one—or somebody nonbinary, which… idk that i've ever actually seen nb/f in fic? i'm sure it exists! but i'm not sure it exists in any fandoms i've been into. pondering the question did get me really thirsty for a good 'farmgirl (of the luke skywalker variety) is absolutely stunned-and-ringing-like-a-struck-bell captivated by confident flamboyantly genderqueer love interest (example wanted)' dynamic, though…

Can a bi person use the f slur? /gen

I’m not a cop just don’t be a cunt about words and you’ll be fine I really don’t think it matters outside of the internet

i lov cleo x frankie but i find it funny that the queer couple in g3 are the ONLY characters that i thought were straight (ish) in g1

Last night I almost jokingly called my partner a faggot and was like oh shit wait I should ask first, and he explained his boundaries around the term, but anyways the important part of this post is that he said something that's funny but also stuck with me

"I mean... I AM a faggot. Also, I feel like if you're dating a faggot, you have to be a little faggoty yourself"

And that second sentence is living in my head rent free it's following me around like a little butterfly

now twt has ppl pitting yoi and sk8 against each other

If you’re ever self-conscious about embarrassingly gay things you did before realizing you were actually gay, just know that when I was 18 I wrote a story about me and my best friend living together and adopting kids together. And not only did I write this literal RPF fanfic about marrying my best friend, I GAVE IT TO HER FOR CHRISTMAS.

i do want to actually write abt how like. SB-verse (and any other immortality/modern verse) william is queer.4queer. like this is so important to me actually. and that he would be in any verse if it was a possibility because like, he's def 20000% more comfortable even in main verse with a queer partner, regardless of their gender for what i think are fairly obvious reasons.

This is the flex of a nine year old, I’m aware, but I can now consistently swim 500m without taking a break!! Not fast and not well, and the guy in the lane next to me had a whole ass chart of what he was meant to be doing and his “warm up” was 450m so I’m guessing that this isn’t actually very impressive to anyone who swims properly but it’s massive improvement for me!

This wasn’t particularly a goal of mine, in try very heart not to make goals about exercise and I only count the distance I swim as a matter of interest of what I’m capable of. I do the same amount of lengths every time I go swimming and take breaks when I need to It’s just really nice to have a noticeable improvement in my fitness/endurance. Especially one that has absolutely nothing do with weight loss or calories or even really skill, just moving my body because I enjoy it!!

And being able to swim my lil heart out and refuel with ice cream and vegan fried chicken? Actually quite magical. I’ve had a weird week and a weirder month but not only am I not falling back into shitty old habits, I’m actively able to see how I’ve grown around them and I’m actually really fucking proud of myself 🥰

Don't ask:

- a man, his salary

- A woman, her age

- And a tumblrina (gn) who they voted for in the nge/moomin poll....

ok. so she stayed over until like. 6am. and this is so hard because well i do like her sooo much and we hung out for like. 9 hours. and obviously i can be so normal about that but it’s like. i feel like. i know im meant to know her. but dear god why did it have to be in this capacity. im gonna go insane

and your shirt matches the keys!