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hepaidattention · 1 year

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I think the difference between JJ thinking he was never gonna see Kie again when she was taken by Singh and when he thought he might not see her again when taken by Kitty Hawk is so important.

When Kie is taken in early s3, JJs panic of not seeing her again comes out of a mindset of, "Okay, I love her but she doesn't need to know that, we're friends. However there is no way in hell I can ever live without her so we ARE getting her back. I will do anything." He even offers himself as a sacrifice because hes JJ but also because he just wants her safe. Hes not thinking about how much Kie would want him safe too. There is love and mourning but there isn't any regret. They were separted on good terms. He doesn't regret not telling her something because JJ never considered telling Kie he loved her as an option. He was content with her just being there with him forever, because JJ didn't think he deserved love back enough to ever consider that. He would've done anything for her and forever never tell her his feelings because he had convinced himself (out of his own self loathing) that that door was never open.

Then they reunite and she tells him she was afraid she would never see HIM again. And they're on the boat and she's looking at him like THAT and telling HIM they're gonna face all of this together and suddenly the adrenaline and the passion and just raw emotions of having her in his arms again makes him vulnerable and in that very moment everything between them changed. There was a shift, and JJ realized he wasn't the only one with feelings, and he didn't know what to do with that information.

Then he isolates. Self sabotages. Self destructs. Etc.

Now, when Kie goes missing the second time, this time is so so different. The first time he wanted Kie safe out of pure love, no want for anything else between them, just wanted to see her at his side.

But now, now she's gone and she'll never hear how sorry he is. Now she's gone and she might never know how much he loves her too. Now there's regret, regrets he can't live without fixing. So now, he not only can't imagine living a day without her, but he can't imagine living with her never knowing that he loves her so insanely much.

Now there's an actual chance for something more between them, and he's this close to losing it forever. He's not just panicking over losing Kie forever, he's panicking that he might never get to kiss her, get to say "I'm sorry", get to say "I love you" every single day of the rest of their lives.

I think this all slowly clicks together at the plane, then at the Carrera's, and then when he sees her and hears her immediately go along with his crazy plan, all the pieces clicking together to make him realize that he can't go another hour without telling her he loved her back.

JJ needed the push of reality slapping him in the face, telling him she's his "something to lose" and he cannot ever allow for that to happen. But to be able to accept happiness and love back, he needed to first know how Kie felt. Now he did.

The first time I think it brought JJ to realize that whatever was between them was very real. I think it really showed him his love for her wasn't a crush or a found family love. He would give his own life just to see her smile one more time, and he realized she might just feel the same.

The second time brought JJ to realize that he was the only thing standing between them from being real. It made him realize that the only reason he had regrets were because he got her back to only push her away.

I fully believe that JJ had to refrain from saying that he loved Kie so many times. I think he wanted to tell her everyday since getting her back from Singh. I think it took everything for him not to say it on the boat, say it at his house, and when she said it at the party he was so thrown because she wasn't supposed to say that. JJ had been trying not to say that for so long and she just said it so casually and no. She couldn't love him, that was ridiculous. No one could love him.

But he wanted to say it back so desperately. I think it took everything for JJ not to text her, "I love you too" in the middle of the night, or when he saw her at the chateau, or when he was trying to apologize, but there's no way he could actually let himself do that. Because Kie deserved better than him.

and suddenly she's gone again, and he never said it back, and why did he not say it back?? Suddenly being vulnerable and allowing himself to be loved sounded a lot better than living with the regret he had on his back if he never saw her again.

and he's standing there saying sorry and all he can think is how much he loves this girl, and then she says it, and the words just get caught in his throat because he's not sure how to even say them. he practically whispers it like it's a new language, like him saying it aloud is something he never thought he was capable of.

But he did. Because he loves he so incredibly much.

JJ needed losing Kie over and over again to finally realize that she was the only thing he had in his life that he wasn't willing to lose.

#jiara #just me rambling #obx #outer banks #jj x kie #kie x jj #kiara carrera #jj maybank

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jupiterredolent · 1 year

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NO CUZ STOP

the fact that 2k word long jj maybank x reader fanfictions have better and well-paced chemistry than jiara in the span of three seasons is killing me.

#jj maybank #jj maybank x reader #outer banks #jj x kiara #kiara x jj #kiara carrera #kiara obx #jj x reader #obx jj #jiara obx #anti jiara #jiara outer banks #jj x kie #kie x jj #rudy pankow #madison bailey

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ma1nth1ng · 11 months

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breathe ; jiara

summary : the pogues return to the chateau after jj gets into a fight. he’s pissed like crazy as usual and kiara being the newly girlfriend she is helps him calm down and reassures him.

this is my first time writing a fic, my summers going pretty boring and i’ve been wanting to start writing stories, so enjoy!

Slamming the door shut to the twinkie, JJ cursed to himself stomping up the stairs of the chateau. “You gonna be able to deal with that?” Cleo looked at Kiara as she nodded her head. “I do all the time”. Just 30 minutes ago the pogues were all having fun at a bonfire, everything was going good until JJ saw some touron trying to get at his girl. He knows Kiara‘s a big girl and can handle herself but that dickwad had the nerve to start shouting at her, like a fucking maniac.

JJ thought that he the thought the alcohol in his system mad him trip for a second, next thing you know he was up on his feet pacing over seeing straight red.

flashback -

The sounds of music and laughter ringed through the crowd of teens. The boys were versing two kooks in ping pong, it was Pope’s turn to toss the ball he swapped places with John b whispering something in his ear laughing. “Come on bubba.” John B cheered him in giving him a quick shoulder massage. “Pope we can’t lose man get on his ass!” JJ stated.

They cheered him on while he concentrated, tossing the ball watching it skip each cup slowing down. The small crowd they had watched closely, the ball tilted into the last cup. Cheering his name, Pope dusted off his shoulders, taking the defeat the kook lifted the cup to his lips downing the whole drink, JJ howled “Atta boy Pope!” dabbing him up.

Suddenly feeling thirsty he lifted his cup to his lips expecting a cold tangy taste to hit his tongue but instead got nothing but a drop. “Yo, be back i needa a refill.” he shook his cup showing the boys, they waved him off.

Excusing himself through people making his way to the juice stand. Observing the opened cooler he stuck his hand in it, swaying his fingers searching for a beer. “Cold cold!” he squeaked feeling the ice cold water sting his digits, he swayed around for a few more seconds and grabbed a bottle hoping it was a beer.

Grabbing the can shaped object he pulled his hand out of the water and smirked. “JJ?” a voice spoke, he turned around and his eyes went wide-eyed seeing a green eyed blonde curly headed girl “Sa-Samantha?” he stuttered, she smiled “It’s been a long time.” she spoke.

“Uh….yeah” his voice sorta cracked, she giggled “My family came down to visit my aunts new baby, so i’m here for the whole week.” she said excitedly. He nodded giving her a fake smile “Uh that’s great.” turning his attention back to his beer, opening the can pouring it into his cup. “If your not busy or anything i was thinking..maybe you wanna get out of here?” she bit her lip.

JJ sighed placing his cup down, “Look Samaria- Samantha.” she corrected him. “Yea yea, see i’m not on the market anymore but i’m sure their’s a nice young fello over their waiting to scoop you up.” he pointed out a boy in a green button up shirt whispering to his friends looking at her. The girl blinked a few times “Really? because i didn’t see you come here with anyone?” the blonde rolled his eyes in annoyance blocking out the girls pitchy voice as she continued to go on.

An echo of shouting ringed in his ear, he looked up to see who was about to get into a scrap because only in the obx you can’t have a decent party without somebody shoving or insulting the other person and not getting a punch to the face. Looking off into the distant he squinted his eyes trying to get a better look, his blurry vision was not helping but he saw a boy and a girl going at it.

Listening closely to the girls voice it sounded familiar to him. Eyes focusing on her trying to get a better view he spotted her curly brown hair and blonde highlights, she also wore green converse. The guy standing in front of her started getting in her face, she pulled a piece of her hair behind her ear and JJ got a clear view of her side profile.

Their was some shithead yelling at his girl, getting in her face like he was about to do something. His jaw clenched, slightly his fingers started squeezing his cup, 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘤𝘰𝘰𝘭 𝘫, 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘤𝘰𝘰𝘭. Watching them going back and forth the guy smacked her cup out of her hand, that trigged it. Dropping his cup not even caring about the beer splashing on his shirt he bolted over there getting close enough to where he shoved the guy.

“The fuck is your problem?!” he spat, the boy now laying on the sand got up dusting himself off. Kiara looked at him “Jay it’s fine, i’m okay.” she gave him a small smile. He looked at her, eyes wondering over her face checking if she was okay, his eyes snapped back to the boy, “Who the fuck are you?! You just go around pushing people you don’t know?” the guy spat back.

JJ scoffed “Nah but you should be asking yourself something like that, you go around picking fights with girls. What are you a fucking sissy?” giving him a dirty look. People started luring in, phones started to be pulled out of pockets. “Oh i see…is this your boyfriend?” the boy looked at Kiara and laughed “Don’t fucking talk to her!” JJ shoved him again creating a barrier between them.

Sound of ouu’s ran through like a wave, “Jayj.” Kiara looked at him with worry eyes. “Don’t even give him your energy.” she mumbled to him, “You let her bitch you? You getting bitched on?.” the boy continued on, JJ was getting tenser, the blood in his body rushing to his fist, Kiara could feel his body tightening from the grip she had on his forearm.

“Bitched? Your getting in her face yelling at her like she’s some fucking dude!” squeezing his knuckles so tight they started turning white. “Yea well she’s got a lot of mouth on her, don’t you cupcake?” Kiara rolled her eyes flipping him off. “Hey jackass, when a girl kindly tells you to fuck off the first go you don’t keep trying to go at her.” her eyes bored into his.

Feeling his breathing giving heavy, JJ tried to calm down. “I asked you for a drink and you started bitching off.” he threw his hands up, causing JJ fist to twitch. Still holding on his forearm Kiara continued “Uh yea and i told you no thank you than you started talking to me clearly not seeing that i was uninterested until i showed you which came to the conclusion of you now yelling at me.”

“Your not even that special, don’t overhype your head bitch.” his nostrils flared. Being held back by Kiara was not helping “Jay come on.” she focused her attention back on him, “Yeah listen to your bitch.” the voice of the touron kept going through his ears, him and Kie made an agreement where whenever somebody pushed his buttons trying to persuade him in a fight, all he had to do was just walk away.

But this fucker was speaking out of his neck disrespecting his girl, he exhaled the air he had built up in him about to turn around and walk away “Instead of you talking shit you can put your mouth to better use, like sucking my dick you slutty whor-“ he was cut off by JJ delivering a sharp punch to his jaw.

The boy stumbled back while people started chanting “Fight! Fight! Fight!” he looked at the blood dripping on his fingers, spitting to the side he got up and stumbled on JJ. “Pope! John B!” Kiara yelled out to the boys. They rushed over such as Cleo and Sarah who were in their own conversation, “Hey, you good?” Sarah placed her hands on Kiara’s face, she nodded looking at the two boys fighting on the sand.

The touron landed a few punches to JJ’s side but he threw sand in his face and flipped them over now on top of boy sending straight decks to his face. He could hear her shouting his name but that couldn’t stop him, he was seeing red. the boy’s face started getting bruised and bloody. John b grabbed his shirt trying to separate him from the boy, so did Pope.

“JJ, the hell get off him!” John b struggled to get a hold of the blonde. Kiara felt shallow and breathy, “Jayj! JJ!” she shouted. Finally managing to separate him from the now poorly beaten touron, they pulled JJ up hooking their arms around his.

“Shit man, you fucked him up.” Pope mumbled. “Let’s go.” Cleo said walking to the twinkie. Pope and Sarah catch up with Cleo, still looking at the boy on the floor he was still heated, gritting his teeth. “JJ go!” Kiara pushed him towards the van.

flashback over -

John b shut the door “He’ll be good in a few, might sleep it off.” Kiara scoffed “Well then clearly you don’t know JJ.” she got out the van following behind him. She thanked him for holding the door and went inside going to the bathroom to get the First Aid Kit, already knowing where he would be she opened the screen door to the backyard. Their he was laying in the hammock rocking his legs back and forth looking off into the dark distance.

“Knock knock.” she spoke setting the box down on the chair walking up to him. He turned around seeing her, “Sup.” then turned back around. She pouted picking the box back up and taking her place on the hammock forcing him to move over. She observed his face, he was biting his nails and bouncing his leg. “That was pretty rad dude.” she said, twisting his lips trying to hide his smile he turned his head the other way.

He mumbled a sentence under his breath “What was that?” she raised an eyebrow. He shook his head “nothing.” playfully rolling her eyes she sighed, “Let me see those sausage fingers.” she held her hand out waiting for him to place his hand on hers. “Sausage fingers? Yea okay giraffe legs.” he shot her a dirty look placing his hand in hers. Looking at his hand she sighed suddenly feeling guilt wash over her, taking his eyes off his hand he looked at her. “Hey, what’s up?” he asked concerned.

She shook her head “We’ve talked about this Jayj. Not letting meaningless things get into your head.” looking up at him with tears building up in her eyes. He caressed her cheek moving his hand to her chin “It wasn’t meaningless though Kie and you know that.” he pointed out. Frowning she opened the box taking out some alcohol wipes and gauze.

JJ pulled his bottom lip between his teeth, he’s been learning all this new stuff about being in a relationship and being open more, he is new to being a boyfriend and he wanted to be the best he could even if that means he had to force himself to agree with the things he didn’t agree too. But this was different because he cared, he cared about Kiara. She’s one of the things that he cherishes in his heart, he loves her and wants nothing but to protect her at all times, and he surely wasn’t going to let someone or anybody speak bad on her.

With his uninjured hand he gently caressed her thigh, “I’m sorry…i truly am it’s just…Kiara he was all in your face like..like he was about to do something and it triggered me.” he spoke softly, she ripped open a pack of alcohol wipes taking a sheet out. Nodding signaling him that she was listening as she placed the wipe on his hands causing him to hiss.

“Sorry” she mumbled cleaning the blood off his knuckles, when she was done she placed the now bloody wipe on her leg and blew on his hand. “I was..i don’t know shooken up a bit.” his tongue rolled in his cheek. She finished patching his hand up gently rubbing circles over them, he felt himself getting tense again replaying back of what the touron guy said.

Removing her hands from his knuckles she rested her hands on both sides of his face “Hey.” she gave him a faint smile. His eyes shifted down looking at the space between them tapping her leg, “I understand and i’m sorry that you had a moment, you know that i hate seeing you get hurt.” he swallowed the lump in his throat nodding.

“My love….you know that i love you right?” she pressed her head against his. “Yea i know.” she gently rubbed her nose against his, his hands moved up to her waist. She pressed a gentle kiss onto his lips, she gives him butterflies every time. “Do you really?!” her voice squealed, he giggled nodding. She furrowed her eyebrows “Does Jesse Maybank know that i’m madly in love with him?” she gripped his shirt. “Why do you gotta go all federal?” he whined.

She giggled “Because that’s your name and i love it, Jesse…Hey Jesse ouuuu!” she sung the anthem to Jessie. He quickly smacked his hand against her mouth shushing her “Hey hush, i don’t want them finding out my name!” he whisper yelled. Playfully shoving her she gasped, he pulled out a joint and a lighter from his pocket. “Hey! Don’t light that blunt until i get back or your ass is grass!” she said getting up.

“Where are you going?” he quirked an eyebrow holding her finger, she lifted her hand up showing the used up wipes and wrappers “To throw your nasty dirty bandages away- I’m serious too don’t smoke that joint without me!” she closed the screen door. She knows he won’t.

He leaned back into the hammock, closing his eyes listening to the crickets chirping and the wind blowing low. The sound of the screen door opened, Kiara came out with a blanket, “figured it would get cold.” tossing it on him. Sitting down again she tossed her leg over his, he wrapped his arm around her waist pulling her closer as she rested her head on his chest, she fixed the covers on them getting comfortable.

Lighting the blunt he took a pull then passed it to her, she took it out of his hands taking a pull herself feeling the smoke fill up her insides, exhaling. “You know your my one and only right?” Kiara spoke. His hands moved up and down her back “I love you.” he spoke softly, she smiled looking up at him through her lashes with adoration.

“I love you.” she kissed his neck, they were each others safe space and that couldn’t be taken away from them. They both can only understand each other on the same level.

“You and me.”

They spent the rest of their night, warm and cozy in each other’s presence sharing kisses and cuddles.

please! tell me how did i do?! i hope you enjoyed!!

#jiara fanfic #jiara #jiara fic #kiara carrera #jj maybank #jj x kiara #jj x kie #outer banks #obx #jiara obx #kie x jj #first time writing #obx fanfiction #outer banks fanfiction #john b obx #sarah cameron #pope heyward #cleo obx

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sylvies-chen · 1 year

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treasure me

JJ Maybank x Kiara Carrera

Warnings: none

Summary: Treasure (n.) - a quantity of precious metals, gems, or other valuable objects. OR: JJ finds a pearl and thinks of Kiara.

A/N: @alphinias this is for you!! my quick little ficlet of the ultimate jiara & everlark parallel. it’s my first ever jiara fanfic and it’s very scrappy because I literally wrote this in one day, but I just couldn’t help myself. I hope you all like it! also, I’ll be posting it to AO3 soon! I promise! (EDIT: I just realized that tumblr literally ate up an entire paragraph and I couldn't restore it because I wrote this in my notes app, so I tried patching it up but apologies if it seems a little choppy in the very beginning or if there are doubles of certain lines.)

••••••••

There are a lot of reasons why being stranded on an island should spark a particular envy towards rich people.

And yet, as he sits by the water with wet sand between his toes, JJ feels no hint of envy whatsoever. He probably should, and has certainly felt that jealousy millions of times, but he isn’t. Because he’s knee-deep in oysters and clams, and jesus christ, what kind of drugs are rich people on?

Oysters are fucking disgusting.

They may smell like ass, but he didn't know that then. So sue him, he went overboard.

The smell isn’t the only thing. When he takes the spear from his fishing mission with Kie to pry one of them open, the oyster opens up to reveal a foul, beige sort of… mucus?

Okay, he thinks, maybe the one he’s opened is just bad. Like, some other fish killed it and this is just a rotting oyster corpse that wasn’t buried deep enough. He picks a second one up, weighing it in the palm of his hand thoughtfully before going in with the spearhead and prying the small clam open.

Much to his disappointment, it’s still slimy mush.

Great. It smells bad and looks bad. At this rate, he doesn’t want to eat like a king. As a matter of fact, he’s never been happier to be a pogue. He’s had his share of mussels and shellfish before, which were delicious, but he’s never had real market price oysters or anything and he certainly has never handled them himself. Only rich people would be deranged enough to touch this stuff, nevermind guzzle this down. Honestly, it’s nauseating. The stuff is slippery, evades his touch when he pokes a finger into the flesh, and— “Ew,” he says out loud this time as he frantically retracts his finger, because there’s something legitimately moving inside of this goddamn freak of nature.

But then, curiosity gets the better of him. Clearly the thing is dead, if it hasn’t clamped down on his hand yet, right? So whatever’s moving in there must be something else.

It’s only after a moment of poking his finger around in the oyster again, when he feels something round and smooth, does JJ remember: oysters hold pearls.

Ah, so that’s why rich people like them so much. For them, eating them is probably like dominating a creature as punishment for withholding something shiny from their greedy hands.

He keeps poking around, massaging the flesh with his finger until an opening is found and a small pearl rolls out effortlessly.

The pearl isn’t white like he expected it to be. Instead, it’s a kind of steel blue so dark that to the unsuspecting eye, it’s just black. Matte but glimmering, the pearl sits lightly in the palm of his hand now. He discards the oyster shell and starts kicking all the other unopened shells back into the water. None of them matter anymore. Original plans be damned.

This pearl. Something about it is enchanting, feels precious and familiar. And maybe it’s just because he used the fishing spear to retrieve the pearl that he thinks of Kiara, or that he associates pearls with jewellery. But he thinks of her nonetheless.

The others are trying to gather materials for a fire, and he knows he should be helping with that. And yet, the pearl chains him here, sitting in the sand and looking out on an island they don’t have a name for. It’s a unnameable place, host to an unnameable feeling sinking into him.

Or maybe it’s not unnameable at all, because he rolls the pearl back and forth in his hand and it’s Kiara. He thinks of her, and feels her in the weight of the smooth stone. The feeling he has is her, and so is the stone. It just is.

Warm wind blows in his hair, and pulls his eyes away from the view to his left side, where Kie is standing.

“Mind if I join you?”

She’s already starting to sit down next to him before he can muster a spoken answer, so he just shrugs in the affirmative. Instinctively, his hand closes into a gentle fist around the pearl, concealing it but never putting it at risk of breaking.

“I love it out here,” he says, and it’s true.

“Me too.” She smiles, first at him, something genuine and incomprehensible, and then out at the view, crisp blue sky and waves included. “I mean, I miss having a comfy bed and all, but with a view like this who could even think to close their eyes and miss it?”

JJ looks out to the view (reluctantly, because Kie’s admittedly a whole other kind of view he loves), finally starting to smile himself. “Yep, it’s a pretty sweet view. Makes all the crazy shit we’ve been through worthwhile.”

“Is that why you’re out here instead of with the others?”

“Nah,” he says, “I was just trying to get some oysters.”

“I know.”

He snaps his head back in her direction to find her looking at him again. “You do?”

Kiara nods. “I saw you just a minute ago, huffing and puffing trying to open one. You talk to yourself all the time?”

“Only when cursing at disgusting sea slime,” he tells her, in a dry sort of humour as he shakes his head. “Fuckin’s oysters.”

As if smelling them in her thoughts, she scrunches her nose up in that cute way she does and winces with a smile. “They do smell pretty gross, don’t they?”

“Yeah, they’re awful,” he laughs, and laughs some more until it dies down and he settles into a calmer state. “S’not all that bad, though. Look.”

Cautiously, he stretches his fist out between them and opens his clasped palm to reveal the pearl that he found.

“Wow,” she says, sucking in a sharp breath of awe. “It’s gorgeous.”

And then, before he can even understand why what he’s doing feels so right, he does something unpredictable.

“Here,” he says. “For you.”

She blinks, her gaze softening into something dangerously alluring and, above all else, confusing. “Really?”

“Yeah,” he assures her, and suddenly starts to feel uncertain about it which makes things insufferably awkward. “It seems like you. I don’t know. You don’t have to if you don’t—”

The words stumble out of him as he tries to stop himself from revealing all the delicate parts of him that are partial to her.

But she grabs the side of his hand ever so gently, yet still with alarm. “No,” Kie interjects firmly, stopping JJ’s world with one look and holding that glance as she slowly glides her fingers into his palm. She removes the pearl. He lets her. “I love it. Thank you.”

She looks down at the dark pearl now in her hand, and smiles. That alone causes a wave of relief to wash over his whole body, swooping his tension away with the tides.

Still, for his own comfort, he adds, “Just don’t go losing it or anything because, y’know, it’s probably like, some super rare special kind of pearl that’s worth a million dollars or something so…”

“Right,” she chuckles sweetly, standing up from the sand. She’s still laughing as she ruffles his hair with her spare hand. “I’ll make sure to keep it on me at all times, and cherish it forever.”

“I’m serious,” he calls out to her as she starts to walk away.

As she turns around to face him again, still walking, she replies, “So am I.”

She says it with a lip-biting smirk that leads JJ to worry for a moment that maybe she’s just fucking with him, that she hates it, that he said something stupid. But then she takes the fist with the pearl in it and holds it to her heart. Her smile becomes more sincere and affectionate, and it stirs something fierce in JJ’s heart, and he knows she is serious. She really will keep it safe and cherish it.

It’s then that he decides that maybe he likes giving Kiara things.

••••••••

Kiara’s POV - a while later…

••••••••

“Kiara, dear, come on out!”

Kie lets out a pouting huff as she looks at herself in the mirror one last time. Her mother is waiting for— well, for this more than her. This dress, this look, this reformed version of her. Kiara looks at it in the mirror, inspects the semblance of elegance that she pulls off in the formal floral dress she finds herself in, and feels so uncomfortably dissociated from her reflection. Half of her thinks she should be used to it by now, and the other half knows she never will be.

Her mother is waiting for her though, so she ignores both halves of her heart and begrudgingly pulls back the curtain to show her the dress.

Instantly, her mom’s eyes sparkle with an excitement like ecstasy, something Kiara used to mistake for pride and love.

“Oh, dear! You look beautiful!” She clasps her hands together and then moves them to Kiara’s shoulders, herding her into a spin.

So Kiara has no choice but to comply, doing a full 360-degree rotation as her mother coos and gasps in awe. Nevermind that she’s been frowning the whole time. Nevermind that she’s already had her fair share of clothing and dresses picked our for her in harrowing situations over these last few weeks, none of which have felt remotely comfortable. Nevermind that she just wants to dress like herself for on goddamn night, not have all these greedy adults with nefarious agendas treating her like a doll or a prop. Things like that don’t matter to her mother. After all, she didn’t even bother to ask.

“Oh yes, this is the one,” she decides. “It’ll work perfectly for the anniversary party.”

“I don’t know…” Kie hesitates, and fights the urge to slag her shoulders a bit. “This isn’t exactly what I’m used to.”

“Well it shouldn’t be, dear. These things aren’t supposed to be comfortable, after all. But oh! I almost forgot,” she remembers, “the jewellery. That’ll really tie it all together. I saw a piece I thought would go nicely with your dress, hang on.”

She scurries away excitedly to fetch whatever dazzling necklace she has in store, and her sudden yet momentary absence allows Kiara’s anxiety to bubble to the surface. To calm herself, she instinctively moves her hand up to the necklace she has on now, and its small charm. The familiar steely blue pearl rolls easily between her fingers, its smooth surface reminding her of a sweeter, more boundless time when she felt most alive, most exhilarated and, perhaps, most in love with the person who gave it to her. So much so that she’d wrapped it in twine and pieced together some sort of necklace out of it, just to have it on her at all times.

Her mother comes back, and Kiara rips the necklace off of her own neck frantically, as if protecting buried treasure, or the last remaining part of herself that’s truly her. (The part of her that, in all honest truth, is JJ’s.) She holds it in the palm of her hands and stuffs it in the pocket of her dress which, to her, is the only real upside to this dress.

“Here we are,” her mother says, bringing out her necklace and parting Kiara’s hair at the back to put it on her. Kie can immediately feel how heavy it is. Big, clunky, jewel-studded. It’s gaudy, and she rolls her eyes. Her mother, still behind her, doesn’t see it.

Instead, her mom holds a hand mirror over her shoulder and tilts it at just the right angle so that Kiara can see the necklace. Just as she expected, it’s a gigantic, kook-like, showy statement piece of a necklace that could be objectively nice in the right setting, but just isn’t her.

It’s so ridiculous that she lets out a wild burst of laughter. Her mom pulls the mirror away, and Kiara knows instantly that she reacted the wrong way.

“What? What’s so funny?” She asks.

“Nothing! Nothing,” she tries assuring her mother, though she still feels her cheeks sore and stretched into a smile, fighting back laughter. “It’s fine, it’s a fine necklace.”

Her mother’s face sinks, flattens into something deadpan and sad. “You hate it.”

“No, I—” she tries sobering up to reality and putting on a good face again, because she really doesn’t want to get into it with her mother. “I don’t hate it.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, Kiara,” she sighs. “I’m your mother. You think just because you go off gallivanting with your friends that I can’t tell when you like or dislike something?”

Kie finally lets her shoulder sag. “Mom, I swear I don’t hate the necklace. It—It’s fine, it is. It’s just… it’s not really me.”

“I don’t get it,” her mother says.

Sadly, there’s the crux of it all. Kiara knows her mom truly does not understand it; she never had and never will, no matter how much she tries (or doesn’t). There’s a pitiful sort of disconnect between them, one that spawned into full fruition from the moment Kiara realized what kind of life she wanted for herself, from the moment she kissed JJ, and maybe even from the moment she met the guys. It was never going to work. This life was never meant for her.

Kiara thinks for one second, brows furrowing, and then slowly takes the necklace off. Delicately placing it back in its casing, she then grabs her necklace out of her pocket and puts it back on herself.

When she walks back over to her mother, who’s watching Kie with wildly confused eyes, she pinches the pearl between her index and her thumb and lifts it up to show her mom.

“This is me, mom,” she tells her. She drops the pearl but clasps a palm over it, holding the charm to the part of her chest right over her heart, just like she had in Poguelandia when she’d told thanked JJ for it and said she’d keep it safe. “This is me.”

“Okay…” Her mom says, though Kie can tell she doesn’t actually get it and is just trying to smooth things over. “Well, I’m sure you can wear whatever jewellery you want to the party. Pearls are very classic too. Now come on, let’s find your nice heels.”

Again, Kiara rolls her eyes. Her mom grabs her hand and drags her away, down and under to a world of someone else’s cruel creation. And though she is not ready for all of the hellish kook antics, the fake smiles and speeches, and above all else the complications with her and JJ, she rolls that gorgeous, simple, precious pearl between her fingers over and over, religiously, until she’s reminded of all the goodness in her life. With JJ, with the rest of the pogues, in the dream they share.

It’s enough to keep her going, running on a fuel of everything that makes it worthwhile.

#abby writes #outer banks #obx #obx3 #jiara #jj maybank #kiara carrera #jj x kiara #jj x kie #kiara x jj #kie x jj

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mariailoveyou-guerin · 11 months

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I think about this everyday how are these straight boys who are clearly nerds and gamers understanding obx and kie better then the writers everyone and their mom knows kie is a lesbian even straight cis boys see it and get it but the writers don’t it’s so weirdly funny to me

the foreshadowing hint of them saying she tried to like pope because she felt bad like that’s exactly what jj did to kie bc he felt bad and just wanted kie to feel liked by him to be nice so true boys tell them tell the people the truth of the characters! gotta love straight dudes who can see understand read characters so well like this!

#outer banks #obx #jjpope #jj maybank #jiara #obx netflix #pope heyward #jj x pope #mayward #outerbanksedit #outerbanksnetflix #kie carrera #kiara carrera #jj x kiara #kie x jj #jj x kie

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blues-valentine · 1 year

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i love ur obx takes! and i like how being with jj was kie’s choice and no one pushed her to it.

A lot of users have spoken about this and that’s one of the many reasons why Kiara’s relationship with JJ is different from the rest. It was on Kiara’s terms in a way she hasn’t been allowed before with the other boys.

First with John B, he kissed her, not the other way around. We never really hear from Kiara that she likes John B, that’s just something JJ assumes and keeps pushing until John B listens to him and decides to make a move on her. But it was clear the moment it happened that neither of them wanted that. Kiara had to contemplate her relationship with John B because of that kiss, luckily it didn’t last long. I also don’t think Kiara ever liked JB romantically. She was overcompensating with her affection because she felt guilty she wasn’t there when Big John got missing, as Pope mentioned. I think she was overly affectionate with him because he needed that and that’s who Kiara is and the boys, especially JJ, misunderstood that increase of affection because that’s just how teenager boys are.

Then, she was the one who kissed Pope, but there were still a lot of instances in which she was given little input in their relationship. Pope confessed to her in arguably not the most ideal situation and then acted childish and entitled at being rejected by her. To me, that story line should’ve ended there at the confession because Kiara made it clear they don’t work and it simply was such a bad decision to even make them a thing. I would argue Kiara’s 180 switch with Pope on 110 had to do with the heavy situation of their best friend having to run away from a crime he didn’t commit and Pope loved her and it’s there, so why not give into that feeling? Then later the grief from thinking JB was death intensified the idea of a relationship in her mind and you can see her trying to convince herself she feels something for him other than platonic love. I don’t think Pope was in love with her either and I’m not trying to invalidate his feelings but I think he was projecting on her. She’s the first girl he is ever been close with and it’s natural to confuse platonic love to romantic love and this goes for all of them. To me, Kiara felt into the pixie girl dream trope maybe also to the others to some degree and that tends to happen with the girl in boy centered groups.

I’ve said this before but JJ is the only one that strike me as the one that had deeper feelings for Kiara, but I don’t think he thought it was ever happening. I don’t think he had an idolized version of her like Pope did mostly because I think both JJ and Kie are pretty similar and he understands her impulsiveness but also both feeling misunderstood and the pogues being the only thing they think of as real family. There’s a reason they’re the most ride or die for the group. 201 makes it a good point on showing that JJ and Kie were grieving pretty similar (speaking up for John B and vandalizing property) while Pope was the voice of reason.

Differently with the other boys, when it comes to JJ, Kiara is confident about her feelings. She’s not confused and she’s not trying to overcompensate anything. She knows and has not problem vocalizing her feelings, something she’s never done before. She could’ve easily follow JJ’s route on pretending it does not exist but she’s not letting him walk away from this. She’s standing her ground and letting him know she loves him not matter what. She’s not letting JJ control the situation. She will wait until he is ready but at least he is pretty aware of where she stands with him and won’t let him push her away. The thing about the conflict this season it’s that both are pretty much aware of what the other feels, so that’s not the problem, the problem is JJ allowing himself to be loved by her too, to know he is worthy of it.

This is why Kiara saying “not bad weird” about JJ makes sense in context because John B described his kiss with Kiara as weird and she agreed. Then later she described her first time with Pope as “weird” as she clearly had expectations that weren’t meet with him so her saying that almost kissing JJ is “not bad weird” automatically makes the distinction between him and the others. In conclusion, pursuing JJ was Kiara’s choice not something she felt she was made to dive into by being approached first but a situation that was mutual and ended up mostly being on her terms.

#outer banks #obx #jj maybank #kiara carrera #kie carrera #jiara #jj x kie #kie x jj #outer banks season 3 #pope hayward #john b routledge #asks

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poguepile · 2 years

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ᵈᵒ ʸᵒᵘ ᵏⁿᵒʷ ʰᵒʷ ˢᵖᵉᶜᶦᵃˡ ʸᵒᵘʳ ˢᵒⁿ ᶦˢˀ ˡᶦᵏᵉ ᵉᵛᵉⁿ ᵃ ᶜˡᵘᵉˀ

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notbadweird · 1 year

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Since it’s known that Kie loves to dance, I need a scene where she and JJ playfully dance together like how she and John B did at The Wreck. THAT SCENE MADE MY JIARA HEART SO JEALOUS MAN! It really shouldn’t have made me jealous considering how we had JJ shaking his face into her chest but that’s a talk for another time🙃🤭

Also…SINCE THIS WAS IMPROVISED, I JUST NEED TO KNOW WTF WAS RUDY THINKING PLEASE AND THANK YOU!

DEFINITION OF BOLD🙃

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erinchristmaselvis · 9 months

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JIARA WEEK 2023 - DAY 2: THROUGH THE SEASONS ↳ being worried about each other

#obx #obxedit #jiara #jiaraedit #jj x kie #kie x jj #jj maybank #kiara carrera #outer banks #obxhub #jiarasource #userlinnea #userreina #usergrace #mine

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saveyoua-seat · 1 year

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Jiara Outer Banks [s1-s3]

#jiara #jiara obx #obx #outer banks #obxedit #obx 3 #obx season 3 #jj maybank #kie x jj #kie carrera #netflix #tv shows #tvgifs #tvandfilm #tvshowedit #mine

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cupidmydarling · 1 year

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Rafe Cameron>>>>>>>

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hepaidattention · 1 year

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the scene where JJ calls Kie a Kook, regret washing over his face instantly, says so so much.

JJ is saying all of this because he doesn't want Kie to love him. He's trying to convince her they won't work, and no matter how much he throws stuff at her she just turns it back with "I care" and "I'll help." Basically, hes saying "I suck I suck I dont deserve you no one should ever love me" and Kie is just saying, "I love you I love I love you" and he can't take it.

Then JJ pushes so much that he ends up saying something he doesn't really mean to push her away, and he ends up hurting her. I think that's why he ended up running away.

He thinks he's destined to hurt her, because he thinks how his whole life his father hurt the people he loved, and everyone in OBX tells him he's destined to be just like his father.

So he's pushing her away to protect her, but by trying to convince her they're not right for each other, he hurts her, and he can see the hurt he caused. He hates himself because he can't handle the idea that he hurt her in any shape or form. He thinks of his father, and how he used to say shit he didn't mean to him when he was mad, the shit he would say to his mom.

He saw himself being his father and he couldn't do it anymore.

So, just like he always does, he takes himself out of the equation. If she stays he might just keep hurting her and he can't do that, and no matter what he says she won't leave, so he leaves.

And when he goes to the dock to have his little anger fit, kicking a few buckets before breaking down, I think he's beating himself up because despite his best efforts he still manages to hurt the people around him, just like his father.

And becoming his father is a self-fulfiled prophecy mainly put on him by OBX itself, one that he has deep down started to believe.

But JJ finally got away from that mindset on the island. No one telling him he was useless, no more poverty to force him to steal, no more house of beaten memories. JJ could be his whole self, he could be who he wanted to be.

But the moment he comes home he's faced with every mistake his father has ever made thrown in his face, and he's reminded again that as long as he's home, he is seen as absolutely no one else but his shitty father (Mike and his old boss to verbally tell him this themselves).

So, he can't understand why Kie doesn't see that, because everyone sees that, even John B has said it before, even JJ believes it.

But Kie just sees JJ for JJ.

The more she pushes, it breaks down his walls because she's not just saying "I care" and "I love you" she saying that she sees JJ for JJ, not his past, not his asshole of a father, but for the guy she knew on the island and the guy she's known since they were kids, and she loves him.

and that's scares him, because he doesn't even know who that JJ really is. but the most beautiful thing about them is Kie helps him see who he is, really, because she believes in him enough to actually start believing in himself.

and then she confesses her real feelings for him and if you notice, he decides to be soft and gentle with her. She's saying she loves him and she shouldn't be saying that because there's nothing to love but god did he want to say it back, and so many different responses run through his mind, all of which are self destructive.

Then he remembers how his dad would have handled this and he shakes his head and gently looks her in the eyes says that they won't work. He won't be his dad. He wont intentionally hurt her again just to push her away. He's done it twice now he refuses to become in father, he won't.

Every response possible runs through his head but no matter what he says, he knows he's hurting her. But he'll tell the truth, his truth, to minimize the pain. She'll move past it, its for her own good, and he'll do anything to make it as painless as possible.

Little did he realize that rather than being an ass and denying his feelings, rather than telling her that she'll get over it, rather than telling her she needed to stop loving him, all options he considered... His way of gently just saying the truth in his mind, telling her they would never work despite what both of them wanged, was also telling her he loved her back.

He didn't deny his feelings, all he denied was the possibility of both of them being able to actually be in love and happy for once. This let Kie hold on hope, this let her know he was just scared, and this met her confess her feelings again to him. She wasn't expecting a reply, but she knew he loved her back now.

JJ saving Kie from Kitty Hawk and apologizing and confessing his love was all actions he took that were something his father would never do.

Because John B said, "I think we've all done some things thag we regret" and JJ felt it in his soul. He felt the regret as heavy as a ton of bricks, the feeling weighing him down and making him want to do anything to not feel like this. Not to feel like his father.

So he didn't. He wouldn't live in regret anymore. Never again.

#jj maybank deseveres all the love #jiara #jj maybank #obx #kiara carrera #jj x kie #kie x jj #jj maybank x kiara carrera #jj just needs a hug someone give that boy some long needed therapy and a hug PLEASE

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