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#keidi south park
fennecfiree · 20 days
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I headcanon kyles still crazy Abt Heidi but Heidi completely forgot about him
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hatsunevitu · 1 year
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there’s something i’d like to share, and it’s this headcanon.
like. i have a whole kyman & weidi au about post-s21 heidi who’s trying to recover from her relationship with cartman and become the same kind, innocent and happy girl she was before. some of her friends (mostly wendy who hated heidi’s guts while her “cartman’s gf” arc but is actually quite caring and helpful for heidi seeing how she’s really willing to change) told her that in order to finally move on she has to apologise to kyle. she was feeling really guilty ‘cause of her behaviour… you know, telling kyle that antisemitic shit cartman has taught her and dumping him in s21e7. she never apologised to him properly and now she wanted to make a change.
so the au basically starts long time after heiman’s final breakup, when heidi finally has some strength to actually come up to kyle and apologise to him:
heidi: Hey, Kyle?
kyle, raising an eyebrow in surprise: Oh… Heidi?… I, um, didn’t expect to see you.
heidi: That’s… understandable. Listen, I just wanted to talk to you about something important. You’re not busy, are you?
kyle, looking back at kenny: No, no. Kenny, don’t you mind going to the class by yourself? I’ll talk to you later.
kenny, grinning and winking mockingly: (Sure, guys, take your time!)
kyle: …So, um, what did you want to discuss? Is it something about school?
heidi: No, no, it’s not. I, uh, I wanted to apologise to you. For how I acted before. You know, you really didn’t deserve this, Kyle. I was so mean to you when all you wanted was to make me feel better. It’s just… When I said all those horrible things that night, and when I made fun of you with Eri… with Cartman… I know you must hate me now, because I would hate me too if I were you. After all that time I spent feeling sorry for myself, making myself a victim instead of taking responsibility for my actions… I just wanted to let you know that I didn’t mean to hurt you. I was an awful person and I’m trying to change now.
kyle: Oh, wow. That’s nice to hear, but, Heidi, I never really hated you. I mean, you were dating Cartman, it’s only natural he spoiled and confused you and made you feel so much hatred and anger inside. I understand it and I really appreciate that you’re recovering now. Thanks for apologising!
heidi: You’re… you really are nice. No wonder he talked about you all the time, huh. …Well, um. I really have to go, but maybe if you don’t mind we could chat later. I’d really like to talk to you more.
kyle: Sure, Heidi! Maybe we can even hang out like friends, you know?
heidi, smiling brightly: Wow, that’d be great! Thanks again, Kyle! I’ll see you later then, I guess?
kyle: Yeah, see you, Heidi! It was nice talking to you!
and then kyle returns to kenny, who’s smiling knowingly and making inappropriate jokes:
kenny: So, how was it?
kyle: How was what?
kenny: Flirting with Cartman’s ex?
kyle: I didn’t flirt with her! She just apologised to me and told me she’d like to hang out sometimes.
kenny: U-huh, sure, dude. And that doesn’t seem kinda flirty to you?
kyle: I’m serious! It’s over, I dont feel anything for her and neither does she.
kenny: You kidding me? She was obviously hitting on you, Kyle! Oh, man, Cartman will be pissed off when he finds out!
kyle: You will not tell Cartman about this. And stop making this a big deal, get your own life already!
and the satisfaction and joy of finally getting a proper apology soon were replaced with irritation ‘cause kyle started to overthink things like he usually does. he started to think about heidi possibly having feelings for him while he really couldn’t feel the same so it kinda scared him. he didn’t want to hurt her or something by rejecting her, so he mostly tried to avoid her and acted really nervous around her. she tried to get closer with him, chat and something like that, but he only blushed and stuttered.
wendy having seen their interactions was quite annoyed. she wrongly assumed kyle had a crush on heidi and noticed with irritation that “this jerk can’t hide his feelings. he acts too much like he has something for you, heidi”. and heidi started to overthink too, ‘cause she really didn’t feel anything special for kyle and the possibility of having to reject him and break his heart again was just painful. so she started to avoid kyle too (‘cause they’re both stupid when it comes to dealing with other people’s emotions), making him even more convinced in her crushing on him.
so basically they avoid each other for like… at least a month before they finally have the talk.
kyle: Wait, Heidi!
heidi: Oh… hello, Kyle.
kyle: Heidi, listen to me carefully, I really need to tell you something. You’re a nice girl and I really, really like you–
heidi: (Oh, no…)
kyle: But I just can’t feel the same. I didn’t want to break your heart but Stan told me it’s only worse that I am giving you false hope, so, yeah… I am sorry, Heidi, you really are amazing, it’s just… uh…
heidi: Wait, what?
kyle: Please, just don’t start crying–
heidi: But you’re the one who’s in love with me! I was afraid to break your heart!
kyle: What? No, that’s nonsense! Kenny told me you were hitting on me.
heidi: Wendy told me you were hitting on me!
kyle: …So, wait, we don’t feel anything for each other?
heidi: I… guess so?
kyle: That’s… that’s a relief. I was so worried you’d be heartbroken.
heidi: Yeah, me too actually! But now we can hang out normally, without feeling awkward, right?
kyle, smiling: Sure we can!
and they really start to hang out and, moreover, i can see them becoming more like besties, you know… they hang out all the time and turns out they share a lot of hobbies together: they’re both history nerds, for example! but the main reason why they’re so similar is probably because they both suffer from sexuality crisis and internalised homophobia. they sure are gay & lesbian solidarity, huh. i’ve written a few words about heidi understanding she’s a lesbian here.
and we’re coming to a kyman part of story, because cartman is pissed off to see his ex and kyle getting along so well. everyone around him thinks it’s ‘cause he’s jealous and can’t just let heidi go, but the actual reason why he’s so frustrated is because of kyle spending so much time with a girl, lmao. he actually doesn’t really care about heidi anymore – though they are in fact kind of passively aggressive towards each other – but everyone else thinks otherwise. wendy gets really, really annoyed when cartman says something unpleasant about heidi and kyle spending their weekend together:
wendy: Will you stop bugging Heidi? She’s moved on, Cartman, get your own life and grow up already!
cartman, genuinely confused: Who the fuck cares about Heidi???
but not only wendy – kyle is the most surprised to see cartman getting so frustrated ‘cause of their friendship. he even tries to fight cartman after another unasked comment, genuinely not understanding why cartman is still so obsessed with him and heidi being friends (so oblivious lmao):
kyle: You said you don’t fucking care about Heidi anymore!!
cartman: I don’t!!!
kyle: Then why do you still go crazy when she spends her time with me?
cartman: …I’m just genuinely concerned for the poor girl. She has a risk of infection with jewish disease or something.
kyle: There’s no such thing as jewish disease, Fatass!!
and they continue arguing but cartman is distracted ‘cause he’s confused as hell and he keeps thinking why tf do i care and why do i hate seeing kyle with someone else wtf wtf wtf
and there’s like these scenes where cartman sneaks into kyle’s house and shows up at kyle’s room and then he sees kyle and heidi sitting on a bed together and laughing loudly at some nerdy documentary movie, and cartman gets all jelly and he glares at heidi like:
cartman: What is she doing here?
kyle: She’s watching a documentary with me. What are you doing in my room, Fatass?
so yeah basically that’s a slowburn about kyman and weidi and i can see candy&keidi brosistp so clearly.
TL;DR kyle is a confused homosexual heidi is a confused lesbian and they’re both oblivious af about their crushes :D
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mikokiara · 1 year
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SOUTH PARK FANDOM WAKE THE FUCK UP AND HEAR ME OUT, KYLE X KENNY X HEIDI HEAR ME OUT
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holyjanolli · 3 years
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doubling down
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roostertuftart · 3 years
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I hate this anyway
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sp00kyfishh · 2 years
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I will never stop whining about the fact that Cartman ruined Keidi 😐
I WAS ROOTING FOR THEM
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pcolada · 6 years
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(tag which one you are)
Same thing but for stan here - :)
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foxydodo · 7 years
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2 moods for the episode \o\
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supreme-dunderhead · 6 years
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when an artist draws your otp and your notp and puts both in the same post
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casmiick · 6 years
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joemerl · 7 years
Conversation
Cartman: *manipulates Nichole into breaking up with Kyle*
Cartman: *manipulates Heidi into breaking up with Kyle*
Cartman: You wouldn't understand, Kahl! You've never HAD a girlfriend!
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I love how Kyle still likes Heidi even though she's she super fat now. The only fault he sees with her is that she ACTS like Cartman and not with her adopting his Buddha belly.
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hatsunevitu · 1 year
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more lesbian heidi x gay kyle brosistp because i love them with all my heart!!!!
the first part of how their friendship started is here :3
they both can’t really accept their sexualities and strongly believe they’re straight even when it’s so clear they’re not.
like literally there are times when heidi shows kyle a photo of a pretty girl on her instagram and sighs asking kyle: “Isn’t she the most beautiful person in the world? She’s so captivating!”
and kyle just stares at her indifferently and responds in a monotonous voice barely even looking at the picture: “Yeah, she has nice features, I guess?”
and then there’s this time when heidi mentions cartman’s appearance with a bit of disgust but in a way “all boys are ugly, but cartman is, uh…” and kyle starts defending him unexpextedly even for himself like:
kyle: I mean, yeah, he’s fat and has a shitty personality, but, um, I don’t know, he’s not that bad looking.
heidi: What do you mean “not that bad”?
kyle: Well, you know, he has these different eyes which is pretty cool and also, uh, his appearance is really… noticeable and… somehow different, I guess? And now that he started to take care of his looks, so… I think we shouldn’t judge others by how they look, but if we do I can’t deny that he can be, like, remotely attractive… He’s still an asshole though, but-
heidi, with a suspicious look on her face: Kyle?
kyle: Can we change the subject please I’m begging you.
heidi: Sure.
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skypemonke · 7 years
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i feel pain in this chili’s tonight
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holyjanolli · 3 years
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i’m into it
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I FUCKING TOLD YALL CHRISTMAS KYDI IS COMING
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