#kawaiikat54 fic
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Presents Or Pranks?
Summary: Janus assumes his "secret admirer" is a prankster, but a familiar face proves him wrong.
Ship: Romantic Moceit (Patton x Janus)
Warnings: Stabbing mention (doesn't actually happen i swear-), pranking mention, high school, Valentine's Day(?). Tell me if I need to add anything else!
Note: Happy Valentine's Day!!! Hope you have a good day regardless of if you have a s/o or not! Also i forgot that Valentine's day wasn't on a school day this year, so ignore that cause i didn't want to rewrite it. Pretend its an AU.
Thank you to @emy-loves-you for helping me with some plot (and basically every other fic I've written)!
~~~~~
If there was ever a time for Janus to develop anxiety, it would be now.
For weeks he had been wondering who kept putting letters - love letters - in his locker at least twice a week. The last letter had said to meet him here, under the bleachers on the football field, after school, on Valentine's Day.
There were two possible situations that this could turn into: One, this was a really elaborate prank and he was about to either get humiliated or stabbed, whichever came first, or two, someone who has a crush on him was about to meet him, and he would have to break their heart or make out with them.
At least if he gets attacked he can defend himself, and humiliate the stranger instead. If it was an admirer, then they would both be humiliated.
He hoped it was a prankster, because if the person was real, they seemed really sweet, and Janus didn't want to do that to them.
It's probably some straight girl who wants a bad boy. It wouldn't be the first time that had happened, but Janus was tired of explaining that he was gay to every girl he ever crossed paths with.
The letters and gifts had always been very stereotypical, like ones you would see in rom-coms and books. They usually consisted of chocolates, little poems, and pressed yellow flowers.
They were all really sweet gifts (especially the chocolates), but Janus still couldn't help but worry over who the 'admirer' was.
Janus anxiously checked his phone. The stranger was seven minutes late.
It was probably a prankster, and he was probably being filmed right now. Janus looked around, but all that was there was an empty football field.
Janus sighed and ran his fingers through his hair.
Would a prankster even put this much effort into a joke? This was going on for weeks, and unless this person really hated Janus, he doubted it was a prank. As awful as that was.
Who would even have a crush on Janus, anyway? He wasn't exactly nice or pretty, he was mean and- well, he wasn't ugly, but he definitely wasn't charismatic.
His whole aesthetic was 'stay away from me', so he always wondered why that seemed to attract girls to him, until Remus enlightened him.
"They want a bad boy." Remus explained one day. "They think the idea of an angry guy with a soft spot only for them, is sexy."
"That's stupid." Janus had replied.
And it was stupid- is stupid. What kind of girl wants someone who's mean to them? Janus blamed the Twilight saga.
Janus checked his phone again. Eleven minutes late.
Janus cursed and decided to call it quits. He picked up his backpack and started walking towards the parking lot before he heard someone shouting something behind him.
He looked back towards the football field to see a short, blond, boy, running at him as fast as they could.
"W-Wait!" They yelled.
Janus waited for the short person to catch up, when they did, they put their hands on their knees, trying to catch their breath.
They looked kind of familiar, but everyone does when you go to the same highschool.
"Sorry- sorry!" The stranger looked up at him with blue eyes looking through round glasses. "I'm so sorry I'm late! I promise I didn't mean to be, but my teacher wanted to talk to me after class about my grades, and I tried to tell her I was late, but she wouldn't listen! And then my friends wanted advice about their gifts for their partners, and I got caught up! I'm so sorry for keeping you waiting!"
Janus knew he should probably be listening to what the shorter boy was saying, but all his mind was thinking was that he was rather adorable.
"W-What?"
Oh, did he say that out loud?
Janus smirked. "You're adorable when you're rambling."
The boy blushed quickly. "I- u-uh- thank you?"
Janus chuckled. "So, you're the one putting those gifts in my locker?"
The blue-eyed stranger shifted on his feet. "Y-Yeah, I did. I did wanna talk to you about that! Which, is the whole reason we're here- obviously- why else would we-?" He giggled nervously. "Anyway, the reason I put those there is because...uh- I kinda- maybe sorta...like you?"
"Why?" Janus immediately asked.
"I- what?"
Janus crossed his arms. "You said you liked me, and I want to know why."
"O-Oh. I didn't expect you to- uh- ask that?"
"Well, do you have a reason, or-?"
"No- yeah! Of-of course I do...you-you want to hear it?"
"No, I just asked because I was curious." Janus answered sarcastically.
"R-Right. Yeah, okay, um- well-"
Janus smirked as he saw the shorter one fumble over his words.
"Well, over winter break? You uh- you volunteer at an animal shelter in the next town over?"
Janus' eyes widened in shock. "How did you-"
"I work there too! I do every weekend when I'm at my dad's house! Uh- anyway, I saw you there over winter break, and you were just so...soft, with the animals, and it was really cute to see you playing with kittens, and you always took the older dogs on walks because they were sad they never got adopted, ooh! And then you helped me carry some boxes in that one time 'cause no one else was, and you kinda called me pretty? I guess that part isn't as important, heh- oh my gosh I'm rambling! I'm sorry!"
Janus was shocked at how specific this guy's examples were. Then he thought about the situations again.
"You had blue hair."
The bubbly boy's face lit up. "You remember me?"
"A little. You cried when puppies got adopted."
"Can you blame me?! I loved playing with them, and I just wanted to make sure they got a good home!"
Janus outright laughed - which, if you talked to Janus' friends, they would claim that Janus only laughed when a kid fell off a bike.
"S-Sorry- I-" Janus laughed a bit more. "That was the most innocent thing I've ever heard."
The blue-clad boy pouted and crossed his arms in the least intimidating way possible.
"Okay, okay, I'm sorry!" Janus apologized while still chuckling slightly. "I'm sorry."
"It's okay. A-Anyways, I just wanted to tell you that okay I'll be going now-"
"Wait." Janus said before the smaller one ran off. "What are you doing tonight?"
"O-Oh! I'm not doing anything...why?"
"The dance tonight? Would the unnamed stranger in front of me like to go?"
"Oh my gosh! I'm sorry, I totally forgot to introduce myself! My name's Patton!"
Janus smiled. "Alright then. Would you like to go to the dance with me, Patton?"
Patton immediately blushed more. "Oh gosh, you don't have to-"
Janus took Patton's hand in his own and brought it up to his lips. "Now why wouldn't I want to take my beautiful admirer to a nice dance?" He pressed a kiss to Patton's knuckles and watched as Patton's face turned even redder.
"I-I...y-yeah, I wanna go with you!" He squeaked out.
Janus dropped Patton's hand. "I'll see you tonight, then?"
"Y-Yeah, sure!"
Janus picked up his bag again as Patton started to gather his as well. "Oh, and, Patton?"
"Yeah?"
"I hope you know that I will have to repay you for those presents you gifted me."
Patton sputtered. "You don't have to! I just wanted to give you something-"
"Nope, too late, I've already decided." Janus started walking back towards the parking lot. "See you later, cutie!"
Thinking about the future dance, Janus decided that maybe an admirer was better than a prankster after all.
~~~~~
Sorry this is so short, but I thought something was better than nothing! I hope you guys enjoyed!
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Reblogs are appreciated!💖
#sanders sides#sanders sides fic#sanders sides fanfic#sanders sides fanfiction#moceit#romantic moceit#valentines day#ts patton#ts janus#kawaiikat54 fic#patton sanders#janus sanders
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The Moral Compass is Lost
Part 6 (FINAL)
tw: no self esteem, internalized homophobia
First previous next
Roman knew he couldn’t hide in his room forever, but that wouldn’t stop him from trying, of course. He buried his face in his pillow. He screamed, he cried, he sat back up and flung the pillow across the room. This sucked. What didn’t they understand?
After the years of them telling him not to like boys, he couldn’t just...he just couldn’t. He thought he’d made his position very clear. He didn’t know why he couldn’t let those thoughts go. Patton and Dee’s desperation, their frustration, their fear. Virgil was terrified of rejection and he’d never once told Roman that liking boys was bad. Why did Dee and Pat?
Ro loved them, he really did. He’d give anything to be with them, and they’d offered him a place in their relationship, why couldn’t he let himself accept that? Why couldn’t he accept himself?
He stayed in his room for the rest of the day, and the majority of the next, he didn’t want to see anyone, and judging from the lack of noise outside his door, no one wanted to see him either. Deceit and Patton probably realized he was too messed up, they wouldn’t want to be with him anymore anyway.
*****
Patton was heartbroken, Dee tried his best to comfort him, but couldn’t help but think about what Roman had said. Not that he didn’t want to be with them, he’d said that he couldn’t.
Like he thought he wasn’t allowed to...oh. Oh no. He looked down at the crying side in his lap, holding back his own tears, he braced himself for the discussion they had to have.
And already thinking about ways to try to repair what they’d done to their beloved prince.
*****
Roman didn’t want to answer the door. He wasn’t going to either, that is, until a gentle voice outside whispered, “Please, Roro, we need to make things right.”
Patton sounded devastated. Had Roman done that? He’d hurt one of his greatest loves, he really was unlovable. He still didn’t think he should open the door, he’d probably just make it worse.
“Roman, please, we owe you an apology,” Deceit calls through the door.
Roman sighed, they were both upset with them, and now they were here to offer some lame apology just so he’d apologize for being such a jerk yesterday.
He reluctantly opens the door.
“Ro!” Patton went to hug him but stopped immediately when Roman flinched. “Sorry,” he mumbles softly.
“It’s-” God, Roman’s throat was raw, how long had he been crying? “It’s okay.”
Deceit shakes his head, “It isn’t, we-”
He stops for a long moment, “We hurt you-We...Goodness, Roman, we-”
“We’re so sorry!” Patton interrupts. “We forgot about high school, about what we told you. We just...I should’ve realized something was wrong, of course you wouldn’t be able to just forget something like that. I hate that I did. Ro, I know it doesn’t undo any of the damage, but I need you to know that I was wrong, and I’m so sorry, he glances at Deceit.”
“We both are, Roman. You didn’t deserve that. It’s...you’re not bad, you don’t can be with whoever you want. We won’t be mad at you, we’re so sorry, Roman.”
The creative side feels hot tears rolling down his cheeks, he doesn’t forgive them, not yet, but he’s been dying to hear those words for as long as he can remember. “Thank you,” he whispers.
“Of course,” Deceit nods, “We know there’s no way you’re over all of what we’ve put you through, and we completely understand if you don’t want to be in a relationship with us because of it. But we must remind you that we still really like you, you’re an amazing guy, Roman. Please, never forget that.”
Roman nods, “I still-” he chokes up “-I still lo-like you both...so much...I just...I’m not gonna be able to...”
“It’s alright, we understand,” Deceit says gently.
“I want to try though,” Roman says softly, “I-I do. I want to try, to- to be with you. To be happy with-to be happy with me, and my sexuality. I want to try.”
Patton reaches for his hand, Roman lets him take it, the contact still makes him tense up, but he doesn’t want to pull away yet, “We’ll do whatever it takes to make you comfortable, we’ll go at your pace, okay?”
Roman feels more tears at the back of his eyes, “Thank you.”
Deceit gives both Patton and Roman a hopeful smile, “Is there anything we can do for you right now, Roman?”
Roman smiles weakly, “Do you guys wanna watch a movie?”
_____________________________________
Another fic comes to an end! Hope you folks enjoyed the ride, i know i did.
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#sanders sides#internalized homophobia#low self esteem#ts sides#royaliceit#roceit#royality#moceit#roman#patton#janus#deceit#ts janus#ts deceit#ts patton#ts roman#tmcil#the moral compass is lost#thomas sanders
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Nightmare AU
Based off of @jessibbb‘s nightmare from a while back. It took me a long time, but I did write something for it!
“That was the last truly nice moment Logan could remember. As soon as the cameras clicked off, everything went dark.”
Content warnings: Major character death, grief, drowning, being crushed, falling, decapitation, hypothermia, pornography mention, suicidal ideation, let me know if I missed anything because this fic was a lot
Tagging people who seemed interested in a fic on the original post: @izzynuggets @whizzie72 @stopitanxiety @mr-scandalous @kawaiikat54 @phantom-moonfire @ocforeverything @pricklyfish777 @arya-skywalker @averykedavra
Logan couldn’t think of why the videos stopped being normal. The one it started with felt normal the whole way through. The sides were trying to find ways to add something fresh to Thomas’s career, and for once everyone was present. Of course, some people were more helpful than others—Remus wouldn’t shut up about making a pornography account—but things were normal, and they were good.
That was the last truly nice moment Logan could remember. As soon as the cameras clicked off, everything went dark.
When he opened his eyes, there was a glass wall in front of him, bordering a giant tank, meticulously aquascaped to look like the bottom of the ocean. Most of the other sides were next to him, rubbing their eyes and looking around. Remus was inside the tank, doggy paddling and trying to catch his bearings.
Suddenly, tentacles surged from the bottom of the tank and caught on to Remus’s ankles, dragging him down. Remus struggled, desperately trying to break away, but he just got tugged further and further down.
“No!” Roman banged on the glass, but nothing happened. Janus ran over and touched the tank, muttering “please” repeatedly under his breath as he watched Remus with wide, terrified eyes. Logan’s chest was constricted and cold. This couldn’t really be happening. Everything was so surreal. The sound of Roman pounding on the glass tore through his skull, making his head ache.
Remus bucked and clawed at the water. For a moment, he managed to pull one ankle away, but it was quickly grabbed again as he kicked at the tentacles wrapped around the other. Slowly, Remus stopped fighting, eyes becoming glassy, gasping and reaching for the surface as the tentacles dragged him to the bottom.
Roman charged the glass, ramming it with the force of his shoulder. He collapsed to the ground, crying in frustration. The glass remained unmarked. Patton slowly made his way over to Roman, wrapping his arms over the side’s shoulders and whispering softly in his ear despite the terror brimming in his own eyes.
Logan looked back at the tank. Remus had gone completely limp. The tentacles slowly released their hold, but Remus’s body sank to the bottom.
XXX
Logan woke up in bed and breathed a sigh of relief. Thank god, it must have been a surreal nightmare. The worst nightmare he had ever experienced in his life, but a nightmare nonetheless.
It took him a moment to realize he was still wearing his clothes and his shoes were still on his feet. And the light was on. And the bed was perfectly made under him.
He sat up, a cold knot forming in his stomach. It hadn’t happened, he told himself as he stepped out of bed. There was no way it had. So why was he so afraid to go outside and see? And why could he hear crying?
He took a few deep breaths and stepped into the hall, leaden limbs weighing him down. Roman sat hunched and crying in front of Remus’s door. Logan’s heart dropped.
He walked over, time feeling like it was passing in slow motion.
“Was it real?”
Roman nodded without looking up. Logan exhaled shakily, sinking to the four next to him.
“He isn’t in there, is he?”
Logan barely heard himself ask it, yet he clearly heard Roman sob harder in response.
XXX
Logan sat at the table, staring into his cereal. He poked and stirred it around with his spoon, but couldn’t bring himself to eat. He just wasn’t hungry, and he was sick of trying to shovel food past the lump in his throat.
Virgil sat heavily a couple seats away, hair and makeup messy. Logan didn’t bother talking to him. Virgil didn’t seem to want to talk to anyone. He got angry when anyone tried. After a couple of silent, long, minutes, Virgil spoke first.
“Where’s Roman?”
“Remus’ room.” Logan said quietly, trying to ignore the spike of hurt that went through him at saying Remus’ name. Roman had been spending every night and most of the day there in the weeks since Remus’ death, wanting to feel close to his lost brother. Logan wanted to reach out to him, but had no idea what to say. What do you even say to someone who recently lost his second half? Besides, it was hard enough for Logan already.
Virgil nodded tiredly, sighing. He put his headphones on and laid his head on the table. Logan thought he heard him softly crying, barely audible.
Patton came downstairs, walking like he was carrying a heavy weight. When he saw Logan and Virgil, he gave them a clearly forced smile. Logan saw the tears glimmering in his eyes.
“Hey, kiddos.” Patton’s voice wavered. Logan nodded softly in return. Virgil didn’t respond at all. “How are you?”
Logan shrugged half-heartedly, putting his spoon down. “Is Janus awake?”
“I don’t know. He’s still in his room.” Patton’s smile faded. “I just wish I could help. He won’t speak to anyone. Roman avoids me most of the time too. I just want to help.” Patton took a hitched breath, tears falling down his face. He immediately tried to gather himself, wiping his tears.
Virgil stood fast enough to knock over the chair and threw his headphones on the table. “It’s not fair!”
“Kiddo—” Patton’s voice broke.
“It isn’t fair! He was fine before! We were fine…” Virgil broke into angry tears, crossing his arms around his chest.
Patton walked over, putting his arms around Virgil and rubbing his back. “Shh, shh, it’s going to be okay…”
Logan didn’t think Patton sounded like he believed what he was saying. He ran his spoon through the now-soggy cereal again, blinking away the tears that came to his eyes. What had happened? Sometimes he felt like everyone was looking to him for answers. He felt even more like that now. But he had none. He had no idea why or how this had occurred.
He just hoped it wouldn’t happen again.
XXX
The next video came far too soon. None of them were ready for it. Logan showed up in sweatpants, with messy hair and tired eyes. He couldn’t think of a time he had shown up looking more disorganized. And he wasn’t the only one. Roman had clearly just rolled out of bed, his eyes rimmed with red and bloodshot. Patton was trying to force a cheery demeanor, but Logan doubted anyone would be buying it anytime soon. Virgil seemed quieter, no longer eager to make sarcastic comments.
Logan envied Janus. He wished Thomas hadn’t called him up, either. Still, he tried to provide useful information even if his chest ached and his eyes watered. Watching Roman wasn’t doing any favors, either. The surviving twin was clearly trying to take Remus’s place by suggesting darker ideas than usual, his nose wrinkling at his own words.
Virgil sat on the bottom step, wearing his headphones and glaring at the floor. He seemed determined to participate as little as possible. Thomas shifted his weight nervously. “Virgil, what do you think?”
Virgil took one side of the headphones off, scowling at everyone else. “I think we should stop pretending like everything is normal.”
“What—”
Virgil sunk out without another word. The video continued without him. When it ended, everything went dark.
XXX
Logan opened his eyes. He was behind a glass wall again. Virgil was on the other side of it, facing him and the other sides. A giant rock rested on a ledge several feet above Virgil. Logan’s heart shot into his throat. No. Not again.
Virgil’s mouth opened into a frightened “o” shape, and he turned around just as the ledge broke and the rock fell.
Patton screamed.
Blood seeped out from under the rock. Virgil’s legs were all that were left, bloody and crooked jeans barely visible, black sneakers unmoving. Logan’s breath came fast and shaky, and blood rushed in his ears. He could vaguely hear the others talking frantically, but he couldn’t understand what they were saying. He felt like he was going to faint.
He woke up in his room again.
He lay where he was, not wanting to get up. Logan’s chest was hollow and sluggish. He knew it was real this time. He had lost another friend.
XXX
A couple of days later, Patton ran downstairs, agitated. “Virgil had a spider!”
Logan snapped to alertness, sitting up from where he had been staring at the ceiling for the past couple of hours. “What?”
“He had a pet spider, and I don’t want it to die too, it would have mattered to him.” Patton’s lower lip wobbled. Logan felt a pang in his chest. “But I can’t take care of it, I’m still afraid of spiders. I don’t know what to do with it.”
“I’ll take it.” Logan responded without thinking about it.
“Really? Are you sure? Do you know how to take care of them?”
Logan shrugged. “No, but I can figure it out. I have the internet. It would… provide a suitable distraction.” He forced a smile.
They walked into Virgil’s room together. It was exactly how Logan had remembered it, except somewhat messier. Clothes strewn on the floor, fake spiderwebs stretched across the corners, Tim Burton posters on the walls. All reminiscent of someone who would never enter any room again. Tears blurred Logan’s vision.
“Well, here it is.” Patton said quietly. On the desk, there was a cage with a small, fuzzy tarantula inside. Logan smiled slightly at the sight of her. Maybe taking care of a creature would be good for him. It would give him something to think about besides Remus and Virgil.
“I’ll take her. Do you know what she’s called?”
Patton shook his head. “No. Verge never told me about her, either. I just found her in here today.”
Logan looked at Patton’s face, trying to read his expression. How much time had he spent in the room of a dead friend? “You miss him, don’t you?”
Patton nodded, breath hitching. “So much.”
Logan nodded sympathetically. It had been hard for everyone to lose two good friends in such a short time. “Can…” Logan cleared his throat and tried again, louder. “Can you help me get the cage into my room?”
Patton took a deep breath. “Okay.”
They carried the cage into Logan’s room together and placed it gently on his desk. Logan wished he knew what Virgil had called her. He felt bad renaming her.
But he was already starting to call her Nova in his head.
XXX
During the next video, Logan couldn’t get himself to untense. He knew something terrible was coming, like it had been for the last two videos. Yet he still tried to give his input as best as he could, all while casting worried glances at the three other sides. Janus seemed just as nervous as he was. Patton was shifting his weight back and forth. Roman just stared at the ground, despondent.
“Roman? Do you have any ideas?”
Roman shook his head slightly. Logan stared, worried. He wasn’t sure, but he thought that not participating helpfully in the discussions seemed like a common factor between the deaths. Would Roman be next?
Roman didn’t seem to notice Logan’s silent prodding. For the rest of the video, he spoke in one word sentences and kept his eyes on the ground, avoiding Logan’s frightened gaze.
XXX
Logan woke up behind a glass wall. On the other side was a grassy plain with a gargantuan tree in the middle. The tree must have towered well above 25 stories, and it kept growing larger, new branches growing off of the old ones, leaves stretching towards the sun. Logan vaguely saw a figure standing one one of the higher branches, clinging to the trunk for dear life.
He glanced to either side of him. Patton stood biting his nails, and Janus had a hand clasped over his mouth. The figure must have been Roman. He rested a palm against the glass, looking around. As hard as he tried, he couldn’t come up with anything he could do. Even if he somehow managed to break the glass, he didn’t know how to stop the tree from growing or get Roman down from the tree.
He looked up. The tree reached so high Logan could barely see the top. In another situation, he would have found it beautiful. But right now he felt like he was going to cry. One of his few remaining friends was about to die horribly and there was nothing he could do.
When Roman fell, he went faster than Logan expected. He would never forget the sickening crunch of Roman hitting the ground.
Blood pooled under the body. Roman’s neck lay at an unnatural angle, and part of his head was completely crushed. One of his eyes was still visible, wide and glazed over. Logan gagged at the sight, staring into the eye, unable to pull himself away.
Patton hesitantly placed a hand on his shoulder. Logan flinched back from it, feeling a pang of guilt when Patton whimpered slightly in response. He finally looked away from the mangled corpse. Roman wasn’t coming back no matter how long he stared, and the others needed him to be there for them. Patton looked back at him, eyes filled with tears. Logan noticed that his hands were shaking.
He looked the other way. Who had he been kidding? He couldn’t be there for them. He was just as devastated and terrified as they were. Janus knelt on the floor, hand still clasped to his mouth, sobbing quietly. Logan silently knelt next to Janus. He had no words to encompass what had just happened, but he didn’t want to feel alone. Patton joined them a few seconds later. Together, they stared at the body and waited to wake up.
None of them had anything to say.
XXX
Logan sat at his desk, reading articles on Ranker and forums on Reddit. He wanted to know what their last moments felt like. Virgil’s death sounded the most pleasant. He most likely felt no pain at all, a moment of it at most. He died before his mind could have registered any of it. Roman’s death didn’t sound too bad either. He might have momentarily felt the impact, but he also might have died instantly or went unconscious mid-fall. Of course, he still must have had the terror of knowing he would never get down safely, and the gut-wrenching sensation of falling to his death.
Remus’s death, on the other hand, sounded awful. He was likely in agony when he died. It is impossible to go unconscious before instinctively taking a forced breath, the sensation of inhaling water much worse than the sensation of inhaling nothing at all. He presumably was panicking, lungs feeling like they were being filled with lava, until he gradually faded away.
A knock on the door jolted him out of his thoughts. “Kiddo?” Patton’s voice was choked up. Logan felt bad ignoring it, but he didn’t want to speak to anyone. “We’ve barely seen you for days…” There was another stretch of silence. “What are you even doing in there?”
“Researching.” Logan kept his answer curt and to the point. No use worrying Patton with the topics of his research.
“I don’t want you to be alone in there.”
“I’m not.” He glanced at Nova’s cage. At least she wasn’t a side. She wasn’t about to die. But him, Patton, or Janus likely was, just like Remus and Virgil and Roman had. It was best to try to stop being attached to other people.
“You mean the spider?” Logan almost said yes, but held his tongue. He didn’t want Patton to expect him to say anything else. This was best for both of them. After a stretch of Logan not responding, Patton just kept going. “Well, we still need you. We miss you.”
Part of Logan desperately wanted to open the door, to cry on Patton’s shoulder, to relieve the intense loneliness he felt. But that wouldn’t fix things. It would only make them hurt more, later. After a minute of quiet, Logan heard Patton sniffle and walk away.
The next video started under five minutes later.
XXX
Logan almost didn’t want to participate during that video. He suspected not participating was what was causing the deaths, and if one person had to die each time, he didn’t want to go through watching someone else die again. But he felt drawn to give his opinions given how quickly and easily they popped into his head. Hopefully if he made his contributions as short and unhelpful as possible, everyone else would surpass him.
His hopes were quickly crushed when Patton couldn’t quite seem to pull himself together enough to speak clearly. He could barely get more than a couple words out before bursting into tears so intense that he couldn’t say anything else. For the whole episode, Janus stood next to him and tried to decipher what he was saying for Thomas. Logan’s heart sank watching them. Either Janus or Patton would likely be next to die because of his curt behavior with Patton. And he had no way of knowing which.
XXX
When Logan opened his eyes he was on the same side of the glass wall as Janus. On the other side, there was a beige room, empty except for a guillotine in the center. Patton spun around, eyes widening at the guillotine. “No… no!” He backed away, eyes darting around the room in abject terror.
Shadows spread from the guillotine, grabbing Patton’s arms and pulling him towards it. He screamed and sobbed, trying to tug free. The shadows held tight, slowly dragging him closer and closer to his death. Logan’s breath hitched in his throat. He didn’t want to watch this. But he was unable to turn away, forced to see every shriek, every struggle, as Patton’s end drew nearer and nearer.
This was Logan’s fault, he was sure of it.
Patton squeezed his eyes shut as he got closer, chest heaving with sobs. The shadows forced him on the guillotine, holding him in place.
He stopped wailing and opened his eyes, face numb and expressionless. He glanced around the room, eventually locking eyes with Logan and Janus.
With his last tears running down his face, he smiled.
The knife fell.
XXX
A couple moments later, Logan woke up in his bed. For a moment, he felt nothing. He sat up and blinked, looking around his room. Then the weight of it hit him and he started crying out of nowhere. Logan grabbed the pillow and hugged it to his chest, sobbing. His fault. His fault. His fault. If he’d just talked to Patton, this wouldn’t have happened.
Janus knocked on the door softly, but Logan was too overwhelmed to answer. What could he say? What could he do? The door creaked open softly. “Logan?” His voice was hollow. Logan tried to take some deep breaths to calm down enough to respond. Janus sat next to him on the bed, hunching over a little. His eyes looked tired and empty. Logan finally calmed down enough to speak.
“It’s just us now.”
Janus nodded quietly. They sat together in pained silence.
Logan looked away from Janus. “It’s my fault.”
“What?”
“Patton… came to me. Before the video. I ignored him.” Logan's throat closed up with barely contained sobs again.
Janus spoke softly. “So you think that’s why he broke down?” Logan nodded once. “Oh, Logan… it’s not your fault.”
“But I—”
“Ignored him? Yeah, I know. But you didn’t mean for this to happen. Maybe it wasn’t the nicest thing, but you couldn’t have known.” Janus’s voice hitched at the end. He wiped some dampness from the corners of his eyes, only to start crying in earnest. “I’m sorry, it’s just—”
“I know.”
They sat in silence together. The world still felt like hell, but it was more livable with Janus crying next to him.
XXX
Logan was at his computer early in the morning. Researching Patton’s death. No one seemed a hundred percent sure what it was like to die in a guillotine. Most people said it was painless, but other people said that there were a few moments of pain and awareness before a person died. Naturally, the darker explanations were the ones Logan was fixated on.
At least either way, Patton definitely wasn’t in pain anymore.
Logan squeezed his eyes shut, trying desperately to not remember how Patton had screamed and cried. How he had suddenly stopped and smiled at the last minute. How—
He tried and failed to stop his mind from going to the ensuing bloody mess. Graphic memories of dead bodies flashed through his thoughts, showing no sign of stopping. Logan squeezed his eyes shut and gripped the armrests of his chair, trying desperately to ground himself.
He dimly heard Janus speaking. “Logan?” He tried to focus on the voice. “Logan, you’re here. It’s okay. Take a deep breath for me.” Logan tried, managing a shaky gasp. He tried a second time and managed to draw in a deep breath of air. That worked a little more. He took a third breath. Before long, he was grounded, albeit shaky.
Logan swiveled slightly to face Janus. “Thank you.”
Janus nodded. “No problem…I saw you were up early. I brought you this.” He gestured to the desk, where there was a mug of coffee and some toast with jam. Logan took a slice and nibbled the edge. It was his favorite flavor. He smiled a little. “Thank you,” he said again. He hoped they’d have a lot of time left together before the next video.
The world gave them a week.
XXX
Logan thought the video had gone well, with both of them making an attempt to contribute equally. So why was he behind the glass wall again? On the other side, a blizzard raged. Janus stood in shin-deep snow, eyes glinting with alarm and shivering violently. Logan locked eyes with the other side. He took a shuddering breath as Janus started to stumble over to the glass, cape wrapped as tightly around himself as he could manage. Already, purple was tinting his lips.
Janus fell against the wall, sliding to a sitting position. He put a pale hand to the glass, looking up expectantly at Logan. Logan breathed in deeply, sitting next to him on the other side of the glass.
Logan hunched over, starting to cry. He was going to be all alone. Janus watched with wide eyes, pressing his hand to the glass as firmly as he could manage. Logan raised his voice so Janus could hear. “I’m the last one.”
“You’ll be fine.” Janus’ voice wavered from the cold.
Logan glanced at him. “Don’t worry about it, I don’t want your last minutes to be wasted worrying about me.”
“We’re in this together now, Lo.” Janus laughed dryly. “Besides, of course you’re sad. I wouldn’t have wanted to be the last one either.”
“Is this better for you?” Logan’s voice lifted with a strange kind of hope.
“I think it is, possibly.”
Logan took a shaky breath. “That makes this a little easier, then.”
“Good.” Janus looked at Logan through the corner of his eye. “You’re going to be okay.”
“Do you honestly think I’ll believe—”
“You have to.” Logan turned to look at his face. His eyelashes were coated in ice, and his lips and nose were purple. “It’s the only way it will come true. I’ll see you soon enough.”
Logan nodded. He’d be next, after all. “I’ll be here with you when you go.”
XXX
Logan stayed with Janus until he stopped shivering from sheer exhaustion. Until he started shifting around in the snow, looking around in clear confusion. Until he couldn’t stay awake any longer. Until the scene ended and Logan sat up in his bed, feeling a deeper loneliness than he had ever experienced in his life.
XXX
Logan sat at his desk, watching Nova scuttle around in her cage. “It’s just us now. You’re all I have left.” His voice cracked, and he wiped a stray tear away. “Janus is gone. I...I watched him die. I watched them all die.” His words dissolved into nothingness at the end of his sentence, and he let himself have a moment to cry. He buried his head in his hands.
Dimly, he remembered group brunches with food they had all helped to cook: Patton’s heavily burned pancakes, Remus’s ketchup spaghetti, his own dry eggs... none of the food was very good. But he still enjoyed the time spent talking and laughing with friends. He missed them.
He looked back at Nova, who had now settled in a corner. “I’ll probably be gone soon too, after the next video. I should figure out something to do about you beforehand, so you don’t starve in there.” Logan rested his chin on his hand. A melancholy tiredness seeped through to his bones. The next video felt eons away. He just wanted it to be over. He just wanted to see them again, even if it was in another life.
A glimpse of white from the periphery of Logan’s vision caught his attention. A crisply folded paper was tucked under the corner of Nova’s cage. He picked it up, carefully unfolding it and smoothing it out on the table. Printed text sat in the middle of the page, bold and undeniable.
GAME OVER
you won
Logan couldn’t hold back his sobs anymore.
#nightmare au#sanders sides angst#tw death#death#death tw#character death#tw grief#tw drowning#drowning tw#drowning#tw falling#falling#tw decapitation#decapitation#hypothermia#tw hypothermia#suicidal ideation#TW suicidal ideation
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Sanders sides school detention au part 12
Here’s part 1
The next morning, at the school pond, Patton is standing there with his usual school supplies along with a large metal bucket. Remus and Janus appear
Remus: hey Pat, what’s the plan?
Patton: hi, glad you’re here! Basically, you know my little froggy friend from the other day? I’ve lured him into this bucket that also has a load of yucky pondwater in it.
Janus: yeah, and?
Patton: I’m going to get detention from putting this bucket over the door of the principal’s office so the frog and all the water falls on her head when she opens it. But I’ve never done a prank like this before and I need your guys’ help setting up the bucket.
Remus: Patton, this is literally our area of expertise! Of course we’ll help you out!
Janus: We’d better hurry up- she usually leaves her office to do the staff briefing around this time, if we’re not quick we won’t have time to position the bucket properly.
*all three of them run towards the main school building*
——————————————————————————
In the principal’s office, after Janus picked the lock with a bobby pin
Remus: *stood on a chair by the door, positioning the bucket* Ok, I’m almost done
Janus: hurry up, she could be back any second
Patton: Remus, please be careful with Lilypadton!
Janus: *smirks* Lilypadton?
Patton: yeah! You know... frogs sit on lilypads, but I’m Patton, so I kinda named him after me... it’s just a random pun I thought of.
Janus: good luck to Logan dealing with those puns of yours, although I have a feeling he’s not going to mind.
Remus: ok, done! *gets down from the chair and puts it back*
Patton: wait... we picked the lock to get in... but now that the bucket’s above the door... how do we get out?
Janus: the window. If you do a door prank, you have to make sure you have another exit from the room. In this case, it’s a ground floor room, so we go out the window.
Remus: if we were on the first floor or above, we’d use the vents! That’s always fun.
Janus: *pushes the window open, smugly* we don’t even need to pick the lock on these, it’s almost as if she wants us to be able to get in and out of here.
Remus: Come on team! Let’s get Patton back round to the other side of that door so he can take credit for this prank! Wouldn’t want you to miss your darling Logan in detention!
Patton: *blushes as he clambers out the window*
——————————————————————————
In the hallway outside the Principal’s office, Patton, Remus and Janus wait for her to return
*the school bell rings*
Janus: sorry, Pat, we’ve got to get to detention now.
Remus: see you there!
Patton: bye!
Patton: *begins humming to himself idly as he wonders how Logan is going about getting detention, or if he even is at all...*
*He is distracted by high heels clicking as the principal walks towards her office*
Patton: *intakes breath sharply* I’m so sorry...
*as the door opens, he hears a splash, a high-pitched scream, and the sound of the bucket clattering to the ground, before the principal resurfaces, soaking wet, looking enraged and covered in pondweed*
Principal: WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS?! I can only assume it was those two pranksters... Janus and Remus?
Patton: *steps forwards* actually.... it was me.
Principal: *shocked* Patton Hart, I am utterly disappointed in you. I can’t imagine what might’ve caused this sudden turn in your behaviour.
Patton: what can I say? Just felt a little rebellious today.
Principal: Well you have to learn that your actions have consequences. Go to detention!
Patton: *looks almost triumphant* I will, but I have just one request first
Principal: *scoffs* and what might that be?
Patton: may I have my frog back please?
———————————————————
Hi there!
Thanks for reading! We’re actually almost at the end of this little incorrect quotes series, however I do have some writing experience beyond just dialogue and was thinking of making this into a proper, chaptered fic! I would start from the beginning again and develop the plot and characters more, probably adding more scenes along the way. If I do write it, please lmk if you’d be interested in reading it/being tagged
Taglist:
@joylessnightsky @miscellaneous-ace @seraphlies @aliviaab @aprincehasgotoslay @wellhellothere09 @g-o-a-w-a-y-p-l-e-a-s-e @kawaiikat54
Edit: part 13 (the finale) is here! Thanks so much for reading this far!
#sanders sides school detention au#sanders sides#platonic intrumoceit#my writing#patton sanders#remus sanders#janus sanders#sanders sides incorrect quotes#ts incorrect quotes#incorrect sanders sides#incorrect sanders sides quotes#thomas sanders#ts sides#ts remus#ts patton#ts janus
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Cold Hands, Warm Heart
This fic was inspired by @kawaiikat54 post here
Virgil’s hands were cold, they always have been for as long as he can remember. The tattooed gloves were always freezing. Occasionally the soulmate mark would spike in the heat for a quick second, telling Virgil that they were happy, if only for a moment. Virgil wondered how a person could be consistently sad… He knew it was possible tho because of the light grey tattoos that covered his hands.
He had two other marks as well. Both of which were considerably warmer. The first was just a small dot, about the size of his fingertip, directly over his heart. It was usually around room temperature and rarely fluctuated. It was a constant and steady warmth that always grounded Virgil.
His biggest mark covered his entire back and wrapped around his waist as if someone was hugging him from behind. They were the hottest out of all of them. Always fluctuating and almost always warm. Virgil could tell they were happy and joyful, a far cry from his other soulmate.
---
He didn’t know what triggered the attack, just that it was happening. In the school bathroom no less.
A loud noise echoed throughout the bathroom as a group of 3 boys walked in. They immediately saw him huddled on the floor. They immediately sprung into action, having had witnessed panic attacks before. One of them approached him, he was short and freckled. His lips moved, asking a question that was drowned out by the static in Virgil’s ears. After trying a couple more times to ask him the question they moved on. A taller boy, hair styled perfectly and almost golden eyes embraced Virgil from behind, holding him and whispering in his ear to breathe. The first boy grabbed his hands in his own and traced patterns. The last one sat to Virgil’s left and tapped a pattern on his chest. Virgil recognized the pattern, a breathing technique used to ground yourself.
After almost 15 minutes Virgil was breathing normally again. The short boy went to let go of his hands when he saw it, the soulmate mark, it was glowing bright blue. Shocked the other two boys released Virgil as well to see his other marks. They could see the small dot glowing in a deeper blue on his chest and Virgil’s entire back glowing in a fiery red. Virgil looked back at them, their marks glowing as well.
-
This is only 500 words because I’m tired but If you like this I’m totally down to explore this more!
#sanders sides#kawaiikat54#virgil sanders#roman sanders#patton sanders#logan sanders#thomas sanders#sanders sides fanfic#cold hands warm hearts
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Rating movies on how much they hurt me with ~trauma~ (Tw trauma, mention of family issues, tangled, mention of mother issues)
First off we got Tangled
I kin Rapunzel so much omg
Mother Gothel brings up some horrible memories
Pascal is cute
I simp for Eugene
Mother knows best slaps tbh
I had to take a few breaks while watching this so I didn’t have a panic attack
Why is Mother Gothel so accurate
Why is Rapunzel such a mood
Why am I low key attracted to the queen
so many questions
The scene where Rapunzel meets her parents made me CRY
I was so happy for her
DAMN GURL GET OUTTA THAT TOXIC ENVIRONMENT
I should write a future fic with accurate trauma that Eugene helps her deal with
Cause it’s not a fic if I don’t SELF PROJECT
OVERALL SCORE 8/10 for the movie
7/10 for the emotional damages it gave me
(Imma make this a series so Imma just tag meh frens)
(I haven’t spoken to most of you in a while so I’m sorry dfsdfsd)
(@myboyfriendsaysimcute @juno-wren @im-gay-and-panicking @ghostcomit @caen-coffee-and-ninjas @justaconfusedqueerkid @kawaiikat54)
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Hey! I was thinking about starting an ask fic... What would y’all be interested in? Anything except medical dramas or u!Virgil are on the table for right now.
I’m going to tag some people-
@foreverfangirlalways @kawaiikat54 @lynxsans @ninathepancake @resident-trash-goblin @stubbornness-and-spite @sanderssstuff @thefingergunsgirl @theweirdobella @wasinotwantedatthisexactsecond
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In A Closet
Summary: Patton and his worst enemy are locked in a closet together, when Patton learns some new things about the both of them.
Ship: Moceit (Patton x Janus)
Warnings: Locked in a small space, high school, mention of bullies, probably inaccurate description of claustrophobia, yelling, picking a lock, flirting. Tell me if I need to add anything else!
{Masterlist} (i know it doesn't work right now, i will fix it asap)
~~~~~
Patton was harshly pushed into a school closet, colliding with another person's body, before the door slammed shut.
The closet was packed with supplies and tools, it was a wonder Patton wasn't drowning the minute the door shut.
There was a clicking noise, and some muffled laughter from the jocks on the other side of the door, and then Patton realized: he was locked in.
Well, it wasn't just ‘he’ was it?
Patton shifted around the other person, trying to get out of their personal space before hitting the other side of the closet wall. So it seemed personal space wasn't really an option.
"Well, I'm so glad I'm trapped here with you, Hart." The person said sarcastically. Unfortunately, Patton knew exactly who it was just by that one sentence.
"Dee. Why are you here?" Patton asked, shifting again to try and get as far away as possible.
Patton and Dee didn't exactly have the best relationship. On the contrary, they hated each other with a burning passion.
It wasn't Patton's fault that Dee just randomly decided to hate him. Patton had tried being friends with Dee, but Dee just made fun of him, trying to push every single one of Patton's buttons! So Patton decided that two can play at that game, and tried to be as infuriating as possible when Dee was around.
"Because I so love getting trapped in closets with my worst enemies, obviously." Dee retorted, but something about his voice was strange, maybe even panicked.
"Dee? You alright?" Patton asked nervously.
Patton heard a sharp breath before Dee continued speaking.
"Fine." Dee grunted out.
Patton suddenly got very worried. Dee never said one word sentences to prove his point. He would always be sarcastic, or go on long monologues tangents, or both! But using one word only? Something was wrong.
"Dee, what's wrong?"
"Nothing, I'm fine." Dee took in another deep breath, but it was more of a gasp.
Patton suddenly realized what was happening: Dee was about to have a panic attack. Dee probably has claustrophobia, and they're trapped in a small closet without a way out.
"Dee, listen to me, take deep breaths, okay? I'm gonna see if there's a way to open the door, but I need you to take deep breaths and stay calm-"
"I am calm." Dee said in an intimidating tone, that was a little less intimidating thanks to the fact that Patton could hear how choked up Dee was.
Patton moved a little to fiddle with the door knob. He could hear Dee attempting to breathe like Patton said, which was good. At least he wasn't stubborn enough to ignore him.
When the door didn't budge, Patton could hear Dee's breathing get faster.
"It's gonna be okay, we'll get out soon-"
"Will we?!" Dee snapped suddenly. "Are we going to get out?! What if we're stuck here and no one finds us and we run out of food or oxygen and-?!"
"Dee!" Patton exclaimed, grabbing Dee's hand and breaking him out of his spiral. "Dee, breathe with me, okay? Can you do that?"
Dee panted heavily before nodding, attempting to match Patton's four-seven-eight style of breathing. Since they were basically on top of each other, it wasn't hard to tell when Dee's breathing evened out.
After a couple minutes of calming down, Patton decided it was a good time to start trying to open the door again.
"Dee, is there something back there that's strong and thin?" Patton said as he let go of Dee's hand.
"I-I don't know...I'll check."
The movement was awkward and uncomfortable, and Patton could hear Dee trying to even out his breathing again, but eventually Dee had found something that fit Patton's description.
"Does- Will this work?" Dee asked as he handed Patton a heavy, metal ruler.
"Yes! This is perfect, thank you!" Patton graciously took the ruler from Dee, gently squeezing Dee's hand as an attempt to comfort him.
Patton carefully slid the ruler between the door and the doorframe, finding where the lock was implanted.
Before Dee could ask what he was doing, Patton slammed the ruler through the crack, successfully sliding the locking mechanism, and opening the door.
Dee pratically shoved Patton through the door, and immediately leaned on the wall and sat down, curling his legs up with a sigh.
Patton watched him finally relax after about eightteen minutes of torture, then noticed the tear tracks on Dee's face.
Patton sat next to Dee carefully, debating what he should say.
"Don't mention my... Don't mention this to anyone, okay?" Dee requested.
"Yeah, of course. I wouldn't dare." Patton agreed. "No one would believe me anyway." He joked.
Dee laughed a bit, obviously still shaken up. "...Thank you."
"For what?"
"For helping me. If I was alone I probably would have panicked and broke down, so, thanks - for helping."
Patton's heart softened. "Of course. It was no problem Dee-"
"Janus."
"Huh?"
"My name." Dee- Janus, said. "My real name is Janus. But I'll kill you if you share it with anyone."
Patton giggled at the threat that wasn't very threatening - at least, not to him.
If Janus' face turned a little redder, it was in Patton's imagination.
"You know," Janus started. "You're actually...pretty smart. The ruler was quick thinking."
Patton blushed slightly. The only person that Janus had even implied was smart was Logan Agnes. And that was in more of a ‘You outsmarted me this one time, so I commend you for it’ way.
"Well, what can I say? I lose the key to my house often."
Janus chuckled, low and deep in his chest, reminding Patton of the air that Janus always had around him, mysterious and secretive, like he always knew something that no one else did.
Wait, why did Patton think that again?
"Well, Hart, I should be going." Janus said, standing up, only to offer a hand to Patton. "But, promise me one more thing?"
Patton cautiously took Janus' hand. "Uh- sure?"
Janus suddenly pulled Patton up from the ground, shocking Patton into falling onto Janus' chest. But instead of phasing Janus, he just smirked, grabbed Patton by the waist, and leaned closer, to whisper in Patton's ear.
"Don't let this little adventure ruin our game of banter, will you? I do so love our arguments." Janus asked in that rich, honey filled voice that he used so often around him. Or did he use this tone for other people as well? A small part of Patton hoped he didn't.
Janus chuckled, and let Patton go before Patton could even begin to process any of Janus' request.
Janus strutted away without another word, leaving Patton to think about the interaction for the foreseeable amount of time.
Something in Patton ignited from Janus' words today, and before Patton even got his bearings, it hit him.
Maybe he was still stuck in a closet.
~~~~~
I hope you guys enjoyed this little highschool au one shot i wrote! I actually rlly like this one! Maybe I'll write more for this universe, idk, i like it.
General Taglist: @resident-crow-goth @macademmia @theantisocialghost @foreverfangirlalways @emo--nightmaree @moxy--sanders101 @quinnthequeer @gattonero17 @trashno0dles @tranquil-space-ninja @chaotic-murder-muffin @lugooble @sander-crossing @princess-rosie @sleepyysoot @hi-its-tutty @lookingforaplacetosleep @sarcasmremovedsoul @corkeecoderyt @drarrymalecsolangelo @private-snippers @girl-who-reads @emy-loves-you @reptilian-with-scallions
Ask to be added or removed!
Reblogs and comments are appreciated!💖
#sanders sides#sanders sides fic#sanders sides fanfic#sanders sides fanfiction#moceit#patton sanders#janus sanders#ts patton#ts janus#tw claustrophobia#tw locked in#high school au#kawaiikat54 fic
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Finally finished this piece for the fic! The first chapter is coming soon don’t worry!
Taglist (ask to be added)
@kawaiikat54
#villysdangerouswaterfic#dangerouswatersfic#mermaids#mers#floating town#dangerouswaters#'sirens'#fantasy#writing#art#art and fic#art and writing#villys art shenanigans
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In The Eye of The Storm
Previous chapter | Chapter three | Next chapter
Summary: In a world where some people are blessed with powers, Patton feels cursed.
This chapter: Can Virgil help?
Characters: Patton Sanders, Virgil Sanders
Words: 1094
Pairings: Eventual romantic Moxiety
Warnings: Crying (let me know if there are more)
---
“After all that, I kinda grew up alone. My mom didn’t, um, she didn’t care if I was there or not, and I didn’t make any new friends because I was afraid they would distance themselves once they found out what my powers were. I guess I just isolated myself” Patton spoke carefully. He had never been so open with someone before.
“You’re the first person who I have told about my powers” he sheepishly said.
The stranger looked at him with sympathy in his eyes, and Patton realized that he had started crying during his story. Silent tears had streamed down his face, and he suddenly felt really embarrassed.
“Oh my gosh, I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to -” he started. But he didn’t get to finish the sentence before he was interrupted.
“No, it’s okay, dude. Really, I mean it” the stranger quickly said, having felt Patton begin to panic.
‘I want to hug him so bad. Is that appropriate? Goddamn it, Virgil, just get your shit together and ask!’ the stranger, no Virgil, thought, and Patton felt his cheeks heat up.
“It’s okay, um, I could really use a hug, Virgil” Patton sheepishly said.
Virgil froze for a few seconds, confused as to how Patton knew his name, but then he remembered the whole mind-reading thing and slowly wrapped the other man in a hug.
And if pink dusted his cheeks, well, only he would know.
Patton felt like there was static electricity everywhere they touched. It had been too long since he had received a hug, so he melted into the embrace. He had also felt a certain warmth. Like he was sitting in front of a fireplace with hot chocolate in his hands. It felt like his whole body was a thousand times lighter like he could float up into the atmosphere at any moment.
When had he closed his eyes?
Something was wrong.
“What are you doing?” he asked Virgil as he gently pulled himself out of the hug, but still held on to him.
Virgil looked at him with embarrassment, and a bit of panic, in his eyes.
“I have, um, I have more than one power too,” Virgil stuttered out, and Patton gave him a curious look, waiting for him to explain more.
“I can take the pain people feel in the moment away. Kind of absorbing, it so I feel it instead. Don’t worry, though, I can get rid of it again. It creates a shadow-like mist that I can release at any point,” Virgil explained, looking at the ground.
He showed Patton by putting his hand forward and letting a black mist swirl around them before disappearing.
Patton know understood why he had suddenly felt a lot happier.
He also noticed the tears on Virgil’s cheeks, tears that were created by his pain. Patton leaned forward and brushed the tears away with his thumb while Virgil gave him a shy smile.
“Please don’t do that, Virgil. I appreciate that you want to help, but I don’t want you to harm yourself”
Virgil looked at him for a bit, before giving him an apologetic smile.
“Sorry. Most people don’t like it when I do that. I should have asked” he eventually said.
“It’s okay” Patton responded. Neither of them looked at each other.
They sat in silence for a few minutes. Not uncomfortable silence. Just silence.
Patton didn’t think any of it at first, but then he noticed the quiet. Normally when a person was as close as Virgil was, their thoughts would be unbearably loud, but he couldn’t hear Virgil’s thoughts at the moment.
“Why can’t I hear your thoughts? Is something wrong?” he eventually asked.
“Oh, I used to struggle a lot with anxiety, but then I got some help. I guess I’m just good at controlling my thoughts now if that makes sense?”
Patton nodded along, indicating that he understood.
“That reminds me. I might know someone who can help you” Virgil suddenly said, a smile appearing on his face.
“Really?!” Patton exclaimed. He could feel some form of hope welling up inside him.
Virgil’s smile grew fond as he watched Patton’s excitement light up his eyes.
“Yeah, I used to be a lot like you. When I got my powers, I could feel what everyone felt, which was extremely overwhelming. The world is full of negativity, ya know, and I could feel every single drop of it” Virgil looked at the ground. Patton put a comforting hand on his shoulder.
“I too isolated myself for many years and developed anxiety and depression. My brother and best friend helped me get out of it. They found a therapist who specialized in ability related problems and someone who could help me control the powers. They helped me sort out my feelings and trained me to control my powers so I wouldn’t feel a million other people’s feelings too. I think they can help you control your powers too”
Patton couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Could he learn to control the curse? Could he live a life where he wasn’t forced to listen to what people were thinking all the time? He could live a life where he didn’t have to hear every single thing people thought of him, a life where he could walk outside without having anxiety attacks all the time. It was music to his ears.
He had a hard time formulating any sentences. How did he respond without sounding way too desperate?
“I would love-, is it really possible to-, I don’t know what to-” he gave up on completing any of the sentences and just screamed: “YES! PLEASE!” before looking very embarrassed at the ground. That was a bit of an extreme reaction, he thought.
But Virgil just laughed softly at him while getting his phone out of his pocket.
“It is possible. We can exchange numbers, and then I can help you set up a meeting. I have to go now, tho. My brother is waiting for me at home” he said, and Patton gave him a big hug before sheepishly pulling away and giving him his number.
Virgil got up and gave him a small wave and smile before walking away from him.
Patton was so caught up in the hope for a better future that he completely missed what Virgil thought as he walked away from the bench.
‘Oh no, Virgil. The guy who is going to destroy the city, and who is possibly a psychopath, is adorable. I am too gay for this’
---
Thank y’all for reading chapter three! Unfortunately, I can’t promise that the next chapter will be out tomorrow. Sorry. Hope you can wait a lil bit :D
Taglist for this fic: @radioactivehelena @residentanchor @omgsomeonesomewhereonearth @magpiemorality @the-office-cat @fandomfan315 @croftersjam15 @kawaiikat54 @chaoticturtledream @sunshineluve @aricana8
General taglist: @naturaldee-saster @ent-is-undecisive @patton-pending-123 @anxiousnotaesthetic @gayformlessblob
(ask to be added or removed)
#sanders sides#patton sanders#virgil sanders#in the eye of the storm fic#patton angst#a bit of#virgil angst#birdie writes#moxiety#crying tw
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More Truths Than Dares
Summary: After "The Double Closet Incident" as Patton so calls it, Patton and Janus have a talk at their friends' sleepover.
Ship: Moceit (Patton x Janus)
Warnings: Smoking, claustrophobia mention, truth or dare. Tell me if I need to add anything else!
Note: This is a direct sequel to "In A Closet"! You can read this without reading that, but it'll probably be confusing!
{Previous}
{Masterlist} (I KNOW I NEED TO FIX IT BUT IM A PROCRASTINATOR FIGHT ME)
~~~~~
"Oh, I didn't know he was invited."
All Patton had done was walk in the door. He hadn't even said hi, or hugged Roman yet, he just walked in the door, and Janus was already on his back for just existing in his presence.
It was going to be a long night.
"Yes? He's my best friend, you know!" Roman defended as he brought Patton to sit on the couch with him and Logan.
"Wow, rude." Logan said.
Roman made a series of offended noises. "You're my boyfriend! So obviously Patton is my best friend!"
As the two quickly dissolved into playful banter, Patton stood to go put his overnight bag in Roman's room, hearing Janus whisper something to Remus and Virgil as he walked by.
Just ignore it, he thought, not really in the mood to argue today. Especially not after what Patton had dubbed ‘The Double Closet Incident’.
It was disastrous. Not only did Patton get locked in a closet with Janus, who has claustrophobia, he discovered that he may have a thing for men. Who knew?
Roman. Roman probably knew, especially after he had adopted Patton into their little friend group. And if being gay was a contest, Roman would be the judge.
But...it was normal to feel that way, right? It wasn't weird to feel embarrassed when someone got up in your personal space, was it? It wasn't abnormal to blush when someone said kind words to you, or odd to imagine yourself in different scenarios with someone you saw on a daily basis and they were-
Wait, what was he doing again?
Patton sighed as he set down his bag by Roman's bed. Those were thoughts for another day. He was supposed to be having fun at his best friend's sleepover, after all!
Patton put on a happy face and went back to the living room to join the others, finding that Roman and Remus were wrestling over something, Logan and Janus were debating, and Virgil was scrolling on his phone. Yep, it was going to be a long night.
---
After breaking up Roman and Remus' tussle, watching a couple of movies, and other various shenanigans, Remus decided to gather everyone up in his room to play truth or dare.
If Patton learned anything from watching the others' turns, it was to always choose truth when Remus picks you.
"Double D, Truth or Dare?" Remus asked excitedly, even though he already knew what Janus would say.
"Dare."
Remus grinned like a shark. "I dare you and Patton to stay in my closet for one hour together."
Both Janus and Patton went pale.
"I...lied. I meant truth." Janus quickly said, hoping that Remus would let up.
"Nope! Too late! Now, you and Patton have to get in there, have hate sex or something, and come out in an hour!"
"Uh- we can't!" Patton exclaimed suddenly, and then all eyes were on him.
"What, are you afraid of the dark or something?" Remus teased.
"Um- no- well, kinda- but no. I- uh- have claustrophobia."
Janus looked shocked, to say the least. Thankfully, everyone was still looking at Patton.
"Yeah, small spaces are absolute torture to be in, and I would prefer it if none of us did stuff that involves small spaces, because then I'll worry about them!" Patton rambled quickly, trying to get all attention on him.
Remus rolled his eyes. "Ugh, fine. But you guys still need to do something together."
Patton blushed a bit, and Janus sighed, looking relieved.
Eventually, Remus gave up, and just dared Janus to eat shaving cream.
The rest of the night went smoother, and Patton ended up telling a lot of weird secrets, but not very important ones.
Eventually, everyone was asleep in either Roman's room, or Remus' room. Everyone except Patton, who couldn't get his brain to turn off.
Patton reluctantly got out of his sleeping bag, and made his way to the front door, maybe some fresh air would clear his mind.
Turns out, he wasn't the only one who had that idea, because as he stepped outside, he found the one and only Janus on the porch, smoking a cigarette.
Before Patton could turn back around, Janus saw him, and nodded his head in acknowledgment. Well, no going back now.
Patton silently sat down in the wooden rocking chair next to where Janus was standing, staring off into space a little before speaking up.
"You-you know that smoking is bad for you, right?"
Janus' lips curled up in a small smile as he chuckled. "I'm aware. Don't worry your pretty head, I only do it when I'm stressed."
Patton decided to ignore the way being called pretty by Janus felt and focused on the other part of that statement. "What are you stressed about?"
Janus blew out a puff of smoke, and suddenly Patton was very distracted by his lips.
"You. You're...different than how I thought you'd be." Janus said solemnly, drawing in another breath.
"Is...is that a bad thing?" Patton asked quietly, looking down to the floor.
Janus glanced at Patton with an indecipherable look on his face. "To be honest? I don't know. On one hand, you're actually a decent person."
"Thank you?"
"And on the other," Janus continued. "I've treated you like s**t for no reason other than spite."
"...It's okay-"
"It's not." Janus interrupted.
They sat in silence for awhile, trying to figure out if the other still wanted them here or not.
"Why did you think I was a bad person?" Patton asked quietly.
Janus huffed. "It's complicated."
"I mean...we got all night."
"...true." Janus sighed. "I think it's because ‘nice’ people don't usually want anything to do with me, and when they do, it's usually for the wrong reasons." He explained. "So when you started talking to me...I don't know, you reminded me of all the wrong people."
Patton's heart broke. He reminded Janus of some probably terrible memories, and had probably been hurting him just by being around him! No wonder Janus frowned whenever Patton walked in a room!
"Janus, I'm so so sorry, I never knew-"
"What are you sorry for?"
"I- That I remind you of some terrible people in your life-"
"Patton," Janus rest a hand on Patton's shoulder, making him blush. "You don't have any control over who you remind me of. Please, don't apologize for that."
"Well- then you can't apologize for being reminded of those people either!" Patton argued.
"I didn't say that, I said I was sorry for treating you terribly!"
"Well, then, I guess you're forgiven!" Patton retorted.
Janus looked at him in shock, as if Patton had just said a bunch of profanities, before quickly looking back to stare off into the distance again. His cheeks were red, but Patton convinced himself that he was probably cold out here.
"You're...too forgiving." Janus mumbled softly, as if he was talking to himself.
"I think that's a good thing." Patton replied.
Janus huffed. "...Thank you." He said, looking at Patton with a small smile on his face. "For everything."
Patton blushed. "Y-Yeah. No problem."
Janus looked at him with a disagreeing look on his face, but let it go.
They settled into comfortable silence as Janus threw his cigarette away and Patton almost fell asleep.
The second time Patton had to force his head up, Janus huffed.
"You should probably get to sleep."
As if on cue, Patton yawned. "So should you." He said sleepily, rubbing his eyes.
Janus chuckled. "Fine. I'll go back to bed if you do."
"Okay, fine. You have a deal."
Janus had that stupid, self-satisfied smirk on his face that he usually wore that made Patton feel fuzzy inside.
"Good," He smirked. "See you in the morning."
"Yeah. See ya."
Janus ventured into the house, Patton following a few moments later.
Patton felt like he was getting into dangerous territory with Janus, but instead of feeling concerned, he felt more excited than ever.
~~~~~
Hi guys!!!! Its been awhile! So, this is an au that ive fallen in love with, so i wanna keep writing for it! If you guys have any name ideas, send em my way please!
General Taglist: @resident-crow-goth @macademmia @theantisocialghost @foreverfangirlalways @emo--nightmaree @moxy--sanders101 @quinnthequeer @gattonero17 @trashno0dles @tranquil-space-ninja @chaotic-murder-muffin @lugooble @sander-crossing @princess-rosie @sleepyysoot @hi-its-tutty @lookingforaplacetosleep @sarcasmremovedsoul @corkeecoderyt @drarrymalecsolangelo @private-snippers @girl-who-reads @emy-loves-you @reptilian-with-scallions
Ask to be added or removed!
Reblogs are appreciated!💖
#sanders sides#sanders sides fic#sanders sides fanfic#sanders sides fanfiction#moceit#patton sanders#ts patton#janus sanders#ts janus#ts roman#ts logan#ts virgil#ts remus#kawaiikat54 fic#fanfiction
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Random Logince hurt/comfort
Warnings: Talk of emotions, crying. I think that's it?
~~~~~
“I don’t understand.”
Roman faltered a bit. “I- what is there to not understand?”
Logan adjusted his glasses nervously. “Well, you said you love me, but that can’t be right. I-I must of heard wrong or something. It is illogical that you have romantic feelings towards me considering how different we are, not to mention how stale and…emotionless I am.”
Logan looked Roman in the eyes, expecting to see him walking away, or realizing that Logan had a point, but all he saw was pain, and possibly even pity.
“You…” Roman started, trying to process what exactly Logan was implying. “You think I can’t love you because you’re ‘emotionless‘?”
“That is correct.” Logan was starting to get more worried as the seconds went by.
Suddenly, without warning, Logan was surrounded by the stronger side. Logan struggled, not understanding what was happening, before he realized that Roman was hugging him.
Oh, Roman was hugging him.
…Why?
“Logan,” Roman began, and Logan cringed at how he could practically hear Roman crying. “You’re not emotionless. I know you aren’t. I see your emotions all the time. Every time you get to talk about astronomy, or you get to prove how smart you are, your eyes start shining and you smile.”
Logan was, for once, at a loss for words.
“You also get angry, which is an emotion. You don’t like being ignored and you get frustrated if someone won’t admit when they’re wrong. You feel sadness when someone else is hurting, and you do your best to help them. You feel jealous when Janus steals your identity, you feel excitement when Thomas learns something, you feel love when you look at your family.”
Logan took a shaky breath. “I-“
“So, yes, Logan, you do feel things. I know you were a robot once, but I like you better this way, ‘kay?”
Logan laughed wetly, griping at the back of Roman’s tunic for support.
They held each other for awhile, swaying slightly as they contemplated their thoughts.
“You know,” Logan said quietly, breaking the silence. “I think I look at you more than I look at Crofter’s. So, um…”
Roman pulled back, leaving Logan feeling cold. “Really?!”
Logan smiled. “Yeah. Sorry, I’m not good at talking about,” He gestured vaguely.
Roman giggled, making Logan feel…something good. “Feelings?”
“Yes.”
Roman stepped forward again, gently cupping Logan’s face. “That’s okay, I’ll help show you how.”
~~~~~
General Taglist: @resident-crow-goth @macademmia @theantisocialghost @foreverfangirlalways @emo--nightmaree @moxy--sanders101 @quinnthequeer @gattonero17 @trashno0dle @tranquil-space-ninja @chaotic-murder-muffin @lugooble @sander-crossing @princess-rosie @sleepyysoot @hi-its-tutty @lookingforaplacetosleep @sarcasmremovedsoul @corkeecoderyt @drarrymalecsolangelo @private-snippers @girl-who-reads @emy-loves-you @reptilian-with-scallions @plinamiismyotp
#logince#sanders sides#ts logan#ts roman#logan sanders#roman sanders#kawaiikat54 fic#sanders sides fanfic
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Don't Take My Sunshine Away
Summary: When Patton leaves Janus all alone, Janus decides to keep his secret from everyone else. But how long until the others realize that Patton is actually a dark side?
Ship: Moceit (Patton x Janus)
Warnings: Abandonment, grieving, mental breakdowns, swearing, screaming, breaking down doors. Tell me if I need to add anything else!
{Masterlist}
Note: HAPPY BIRTHDAY JANUS!!!!! I finished this as quickly as I could for today!!! Lets hope its not as rushed as it actually is!!!
Title from the song "You Are My Sunshine" obviously
~~~~~
"What if we left?"
Janus stopped reading his book to look up at Patton. "What?" He asked with a slight chuckle.
"What if we left?" Patton continued. "No one here likes us, so I don't see why we can't just leave."
"Sunshine, that..." Janus laughed and closed his book, looking at Patton with amused features. "Well, even if we could, where would we go?"
Patton shifted on the bed to look at where Janus was sitting. "The door." He suggested quietly.
Janus' grin fell. "No."
"Janu-"
"No! Patton, they would never accept us there, it would be so much worse."
"But we don't know that! The door opened for the other half of King, so maybe we could-"
"Stop!" Janus exclaimed. "Don't mention King." He pleaded softly. "Please."
Patton pulled up his legs and sat in a ball. "Okay."
Janus looked at the sad ball before sighing and putting a hand on Patton's back. "Listen. I'm just trying to protect you. We don't know what they'll do to us dark sides-"
Patton shook off Janus' hand and stood up. "'What they'll do to us'? Janus, look at what our sides do to us now!" Patton lifted his shirt, revealing splotches of green, froggy skin. "Look at what they've done to me!" He then gestured to Janus' scales. "Look at what they've done to you-"
"Enough!" Janus shouted, making Patton flinch. They both let a few tears fall. "They won't accept you. Ever. They'll take one look at you and think that you're a monster. You will never be like them, got it?"
Patton only responded by running out. And when Janus found a note the next morning, stating that Patton had left, then that was more of an answer than he needed.
---
After that night, Janus hadn't seen Patton in years. They were barely teenagers when it happened. Most of the dark sides weren't even around anymore, most of them fading away. Though, Orange had hidden away, Remus had returned from the imagination shortly after Patton had left, not getting the chance to even know that he was a dark side.
Virgil had also appeared around that time, never knowing that there was another dark side. Only knowing the stories that Janus had told him.
A story. That's all it was; a cautionary tale of a side who went through the light sides' door and never came back. It was supposed to keep anyone else from leaving. And it did for awhile.
Janus, Remus, and Virgil were a family, and nothing could rip them apart. Janus never wanted to lose any of them again. Not like he lost Patton.
And occasionally he let something about Patton slip. They would ask about the supposedly meaningless knickknacks that he kept around, one of them would act softer and he would let a nickname reserved for only Patton slip. They asked where the story came from, and he had to lie to them.
He didn't even know why he was lying about him. What was the point of keeping Patton a secret? Patton had left him, and it was fair that Patton would get some kind of repercussion.
But maybe thats why Janus kept him secret; he wanted Patton to have what he couldn't. Patton deserved to be happy, because he gave so much to everyone, and never asked for anything back.
Janus loved Patton, that's why he was a secret. If Remus or Virgil found out that a fellow dark side had hurt him, then all hell would break loose and Patton wouldn't be safe.
But he caught their sad looks when he read a philosophy book that Patton had gifted him, saw their glances when he baked one of Patton's recipes, saw their concern when he called one of them 'Sunbeam'. They didn't know about Patton, but they did know what Janus did when he was upset.
Then Remus and Virgil started fighting. It wasn't playful, sibling-like, fighting either. They got genuinely angry with one another. Janus didn't even know where it was coming from, only that it was hurting the both of them and that he had no idea how to stop it.
"Janus." Virgil said with a little attitude, which tended to happen a lot more since the fighting started. "I have a question." He said from behind Janus.
"And I don't have an answer." Janus said with an obvious lie in his voice, continuing to prepare their meal.
"Can you just cut the bulls**t and answer me honestly for once?!" Virgil snapped.
"Not when you talk to me like that." Janus chided. Virgil chose not to respond. "What do you want to know?"
Virgil sighed. "How'd you come up with the door story?"
Janus froze, choosing to keep his back turned to Virgil.
"Janus?"
"Why do you want to know?"
"Can't you just answer me?!"
Janus sighed, already knowing that Virgil wasn't going to let this go. "The other side of that door is dangerous, so I didn't want anyone going through it."
"Dangerous...how?"
"It just is."
"That's not an answer-"
Janus finally turned to look at Virgil. "Well maybe I don't have an answer!" He exclaimed.
Virgil looked shocked, then angry. "You...don't have an answer." He repeated. "So...what? Was it a lie? What's on the other side of that door?"
Janus couldn't find any words.
"Do you even know?"
"Yes. I know." He grumbled.
"Then why won't you answer me?"
"Because its dangerous!"
"How?!" Virgil yelled. "How is it dangerous? Why aren't you answering me?!"
"I'm just trying to protect you!" Janus screamed back.
"Then tell me what you're trying to protect me from!"
Janus slammed his hands on the counter. "STOP! JUST STOP! I CAN'T DO THIS- I'M NOT STRONG ENOUGH TO DO THIS AGAIN!"
Virgil was stunned into silence, and that's when Janus realized what he had said.
"'Again'?" Virgil sighed as Janus saw the tears in his eyes. "You know, I only asked cause I wanted to know if I could trust you." His voice cracked. "And clearly I can't."
Virgil turned and ran back to his room, leaving Janus crying at the kitchen counter.
---
Virgil spent the next few days in his room, and when he emerged from his room again, he was carrying a backpack, and heading towards the light sides' door.
Janus grabbed Virgil's arm. "Virgil, what are you doing?"
Virgil only glared at him. "If going through that door will actually kill me, I need you to tell me now."
Janus almost started crying right there. "No, please no, Virgil-"
Virgil shook out of Janus' grip. "Janus I need you to tell me now! Will I, or will I not, die?! And don't lie to me!"
Janus let some of his tears spill. "...Sunshine, please. I-"
"See?! There's something you're not telling us! Who are you talking about?! Who is 'Sunshine'?! Why are you lying to me?!"
"I...Virgil I can't- he- I can't."
Virgil scoffed. "I can't believe this." He started walking to the door.
"YOU CAN'T JUST LEAVE US!" Janus screamed.
Virgil immediately turned around. "DON'T YOU EVER CONSIDER MY FEELINGS? DON'T YOU KNOW HOW MISERABLE I AM HERE?!" Virgil had started crying too, though, for entirely different reasons. "NO! You were too wrapped up in whatever you're not telling us to even look at me!" Virgil walked back to the door, putting his hand on the handle. "Goodbye, Deceit."
Janus didn't even get to respond before Virgil was shutting the door.
Remus, who supposedly came out of nowhere, put a hand on Janus' shoulder, before Janus shrugged it off and bolted to his room.
---
It would be a little over two years until Janus would see Virgil again, and it wasn't a happy reunion like he wanted it to be.
It was in a video; Janus' first video: 'Can Lying Be Good?' He disguised himself as the only side who he knew they would trust, a side he knew he could imitate well, despite not seeing him for years.
He was playing a perfect Patton, and when Virgil rose up, he almost lost his facade.
He looked so...different. It hadn't even been that long, had it? He got rid of the jacket that Janus and Remus had made him for his birthday, trading it for a new purple and black one. He had also gotten darker eyeshadow, like he said he wanted every Christmas.
But he still acted the same. Well, no, it wasn't the same, was it? It was what he was like before he had started fighting with them. Like these people were...his family.
Janus suddenly knew where he stood with Virgil. If Virgil was willing to trade his entire life away, then Janus wasn't going to play nice like he intended. Virgil threw them away like garbage, so why should he let him live without knowing what he did? Sure, it was petty, but Virgil was being less than fair.
"Its me...aren't we friends?"
"I'm not so sure we are." That line shouldn't have hurt as much as it did.
"You have no Morality." As much as Janus didn't want to admit it, he was telling the full truth when he stated that, hoping no one would notice.
The minute Patton rose up he was ready to leave. He didn't want to see what had become of the previous dark side. Didn't want to be reminded of what had happened. Didn't want to see how much better he was doing here. Hearing all the sides whimper over what had happened to their beloved Morality was already torture enough.
"Um, you're in my spot." His spot. Of course he had a spot. Why wouldn't he have a spot? Its not like he's been lying to all the other sides (and even Thomas) since he's known them, despite preaching about how important being truthful was. Maybe by doing that, he was trying to make sure he never saw Janus again. It wasn't unlikely.
Janus and Patton pretended not to know each other for the rest of the episode. For the viewers, and for the other sides. Despite resenting Patton still, he couldn't bring himself to hurt him.
And then 'Selflessness VS Selfishness' came around, and Janus was pissed. Patton was making all of the other sides go to a wedding, and for what? To sit around feeling sorry for himself while his friends ignore him? It was ridiculous! He was taking this 'Morality' thing too far.
By the time Janus had gotten home, he was tired and angry. He slumped on the couch, burying himself with his cape and hat.
"Jan! What happened?! Did you see Virg-"
"I want you to rain hell on the light sides." Janus commanded casually.
Remus clapped his hands excitedly. "Ooh!!! Fun! What do you want me to do?"
"Just- something, I don't know! Make them think that Thomas is a bad person or something. I just want them to suffer for a bit and see how it feels."
"Okay! I can do that easily! Don't worry about it any longer, I'll stick to them like mushrooms on a corpse!" Remus ran off to his room, babbling something about killing Thomas' brother while Janus sat quietly on the couch.
---
'Putting Others First' was a nightmare.
When Janus placed a skip button over Logan's dialog box, he didn't actually expect someone to hit it. Let alone that person being Patton.
As Logan got pulled off camera, Janus was waiting for him in his room, sitting on Logan's bed.
Logan glanced at him, and rubbed at his neck, where the cane yanked him. "Deceit. Was that really necessary?"
"To be fair, I did think they would actually push the button." Deceit replied casually, then stood up. "Logan, let me take your place for a bit."
Logan rolled his eyes. "What makes you think taking my place would work? If you impersonated Virgil, or even Remus, you would be heard better and things would go your way. It won't work if you mimic me." He looked down at the floor sadly. "They don't listen to me."
Janus got off the bed and put a hand on Logan's shoulder. "I'm going to make them wish they paid attention. Then they might've been able to see what was coming. They'll regret ever pushing that button."
Logan thought for a second before nodding. "Alright." He quickly started loosening his tie. "I only have one thing to ask you."
"What's that?" Janus asked, taking the tie from Logan's hand.
Logan frowned. "Make them realize they made a mistake ignoring me, please."
Janus smirked. "You definitely had to ask."
---
Patton revealed his frog side. F**k. Were the others going to find out that Patton used to be dark? That he still is a dark side?
Granted, Janus did kind of cause it to happen; he pushed Patton to the point of a mental breakdown. He felt bad. He shouldn't feel bad, he's supposed to hate Patton for what he's done.
But he can't. He could never hate Patton. Even though he really wanted to.
"Is there a limit on how many times someone can say sorry, before you have to admit that they're just bad for you?" Patton had asked in a quiet voice.
Janus almost broke character.
"Okay." Patton responded to the answer Janus had given.
Janus did break character.
He couldn't handle Patton being sad, he never could. It was one of his weaknesses: his family being upset.
He was mad before, mad that Patton and Virgil were living happily without him.
Was he the problem? Had he always been the problem? Is that why they left?
Janus sunk out, pretending to feel accomplished, when he actually felt like s**t.
---
Patton stood in front of the dark side's door, hand shaking as he gripped the handle. It was fine. He could do this. It's not like they would hate him....more than the others do right now.
Who was he kidding? Janus probably hated him more than anyone else right now. Probably more than anyone ever.
But it beats still being here. Unwanted. Hated. Wrong.
This was infinitely better than having to see Logan be disappointed in him. Better than seeing Virgil send him glares that only said 'You betrayed me. You chose him over me.'
A million times better than not seeing Roman at all.
So he opened the door, hoping to just disappear into his room without anyone seeing him. But of course that couldn't happen.
He entered the dark side's common area (why should he even call it that anymore? It was his area as well) and froze upon seeing Janus reading a book on the sofa.
'Maybe if I'm quiet he won't notice me' he thought to himself.
"Patton?" Or not. Janus stood from where he was sitting and looked at Patton with a confused expression on his face. "Why...why are you...here?"
Patton didn't know what to say. He couldn't lie, but what else was he supposed to say? 'I'm back because everyone hates me and you were right all along about me never being good?' Well, Janus does love hearing that he's right...
"Patton? Patton!" Patton snapped out of his internal monologue to Janus shaking his shoulders, concern in his face.
Janus sighed when he realized he got Patton's attention, making Patton flich, thinking he had upset Janus in some way. Janus caught it. "No, hey, hey, sunshine, you're okay, you're okay. What's the matter, sunlight?"
Patton started sobbing. It was like something cracked in him when he heard Janus say that. Distantly he felt someone hold him, but that wasn't what he was focused on.
'Sunshine' rang in his head on repeat. It used to be one of many nicknames that Janus had called Patton, just like 'Sunlight', 'Sunbeam', and 'Sunray', but after he left...
Let's just say he hasn't heard any nicknames like that for years.
"Shh, shh, hey, you're alright, I've got you, you're gonna be okay." Janus cooed in his ear, rubbing small circles on Patton's back.
Something in the back of Patton's head reminded him that Janus was the embodiment of deceit and was probably lying, but he could care less about that right now. All he wanted was for Janus to keep telling him that he safe, that he was okay.
"Sunbeam, Patton, breathe." Patton didn't realize that he was gasping for air until Janus had reminded him.
"Ssssorry- I-" Patton hiccuped and kept gasping, cutting off his sentence. He uselessly tried to apologize for not being able to speak, but that obviously didn't work out.
"Shh, it's alright, calm down, love. Take your time."
Patton simply nodded, trying to get his breathing under control. It took a couple of minutes, but Patton was breathing normally again, just letting Janus rock him back and forth where they still stood in the living room.
"They hate me." Patton whimpered quietly. "You were right. I'll never be good and I keep making the wrong choices and now they all hate me." His voice cracked.
"Patton... I didn't want- I- I never wanted to be right about that." Janus said softly, carding through Patton's hair, making him melt.
"Well...you were. I should've listened to you."
"No, Patton, I-" Janus looked Patton in the eyes, his face looking heartbroken and guilty. "I lied. I knew that you'd get accepted cause you're...you. So, I lied to make you stay with me. I'm so sorry, I never meant for it to become reality."
Patton only sniffled in response.
"Hey Jan, have you seen my-" Remus said before abruptly stopping. "Uh- I'll just look for them myself." He said before quickly exiting the room.
Janus swore under his breath, and Patton pulled back. Patton wiped at his eyes. "Sorry about that. I can go now-"
"No!" Janus grabbed Patton's wrist, frantically but gently. "I- I mean...it's fine. You can stay as long as you want."
Patton looked up from where he was staring at their hands - which they were holding now, Janus noticed - to look at Janus with hopeful eyes. "Are you sure? I don't wanna be a bother..."
"You're not a bother. You can stay. I just have to talk to Remus about-"
"Me?" Patton asked. "About what I used to- well, what I am?"
Janus nodded. "Yes. If you're okay with that?"
"Yeah. I have to tell the others soon anyway. But...I should wait till they calm down."
"Alright. You can not get yourself comfortable in my room while you wait."
Patton nodded and made his way over to Janus' room, while Janus did the same with Remus'.
Well, this was going to be an interesting conversation.
~~~~~
HA it needs to be in two parts! I tricked you into thinking that it was one!!!!
It was actually supposed to be, but Tumblr said it was too long! So uh part two tomorrow! Ask if u wanna be tagged!
{Next}
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#sanders sides#moceit#eventual moceit#patton angst#janus angst#ts janus#ts patton#janus sanders birthday#ts virgil#ts remus#janus sanders#patton sanders#kawaiikat54 fic#sanders sides fic#sanders sides fanfic#sanders sides fanfiction
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Don't Take My Sunshine Away (Pt 2)
{Pt 1}
Summary: When Patton leaves Janus all alone, Janus decides to keep his secret from everyone else. But how long until the others realize that Patton is actually a dark side?
Ship: Moceit (Patton x Janus)
Warnings: Abandonment, grieving, mental breakdowns, swearing, screaming, bad thoughts, fighting (not physical), breaking down doors. Tell me if I need to add anything else!
{Masterlist}
Janus knocked on the green door. "Remus? I'm coming in."
Janus opened the door, not waiting for an answer.
Remus was sitting on his bed, inspecting a small picture frame, one that Patton had made for Janus when they were still friends.
Janus had taken the photo out years ago, ripping it to pieces in anger.
He should've kept that photo.
"Remus?" Janus asked cautiously, closing the door behind him.
"So," Remus started. "Patton is the one you've been hiding."
Janus sighed, before making his way over to sit on the unusually clean bed next to Remus.
"How'd you know that I was hiding someone?"
Remus continued to fidget with the frame. "I used context clues. You weren't very good at suggesting that there wasn't another one who..."
"Left." Janus finished. "Another one who left."
Remus gulped. "Yeah."
It was silent for a few more moments before Remus got impatient.
"Did it hurt? Having two people you care about leave in the same way?" He asked, now leaning up to stare at the ceiling.
Janus flopped backwards. "The first time it did." He said with a hurt voice. "I was screaming and crying and angry. But with Virgil I was...numb. I didn't know how to deal with it happening again, so I just...shut down."
Janus made another sigh as tears rolled down his face. "I'm sorry. I should've been there for you when he left. I knew how it felt, I should've been helping you instead of hiding away."
Remus flopped down next to him. "No. Neither of us were coping well then, it wouldn't matter if you wanted to help or not, I would've just ignored you and yelled at you anyway."
"I still should've been better."
Remus huffed. "We all should've been better. Virgil and Patton shouldn't have left, me and Roman shouldn't of split, Logan shouldn't have been so strict about what was good for Thomas," Remus waved his hands in the air. "We're all f**ked."
Janus huffed a little laugh. "I guess you're right."
They sat in silence for a few minutes, reveling in the lack of tension; everything was out in the open now.
Remus spoke up again. "You're in love with him." He said as if it was a well-known fact.
Janus immediately froze. "No, I'm not."
"Says the embodiment of Deceit." Remus refuted.
Janus scoffed. "Why would I be in love with him? He ruined my life."
Remus sat up to look at him. "Uh, yeah! Ruined it because he left you! And it got ruined because you're in love with him! And it hurt because he was your first and only love!"
Janus sighed. "Remus-"
"You have to tell him!" Remus interrupted.
"Why?! So he can leave me all over again?!" Janus shot back. "No! I'm not letting that happen!"
Remus slumped in defeat.
Janus already knew he was in love with Patton. He had years to think about why it hurt so much, so it wasn't much of a surprise that he figured it out. But he wasn't about to ruin everything over some silly feelings left over from years ago.
He sighed. "You're not right. I don't love him." He obviously lied. "But I can't afford to lose him. Not again."
Remus perked up at that. "So no locking you both in a closet 'till you two f-"
"Yes, I totally want that." Janus answered sarcastically.
Remus cackled and Janus smiled at it.
"Well," Janus stood, brushing himself off (you never know what could be in Remus' room). "I should check on him."
Remus lost his maniacal grin, instead it turned to a soft smile. "You love him." He teased.
Janus smiled as he exited the room. "No, I don't."
---
Janus entered his own room, glancing around.
He spotted Patton near his bookshelf, fiddling with something in his hand.
"What do you have there?" He asked.
Patton turned to look at him, then raised up the object in his hand to show Janus.
It was a bracelet. A bracelet with yellow and black strings that are kind of falling apart, and little silver and gold charms. A bracelet that Patton made for Janus years ago.
"Why do you still have this?" Patton asked in a tiny voice. He had an indecipherable emotion on his face.
"I...I don't know. I just kept everything." Janus lied. He did know why he kept them, but he sure as hell wasn't going to tell Patton.
Patton looked back down at the worn bracelet in his hands.
Janus sighed and sat on the bed. "Did you sleep last night?" He asked.
Patton kept twisting the bracelet in his fingers. "...yes?" He answered.
Janus raised an eyebrow and Patton sighed.
"I couldn't." He admitted quietly. "Too many thoughts.
Janus patted the spot next to him on the bed, and Patton slowly made his way onto it.
"Really scary thoughts." Patton whispered.
Janus layed his hand between them; an offering.
Patton immediately took it in his own and leaned his head on Janus' shoulder.
Janus quickly used one of his extra arms to wrap around Patton's shoulders, rubbing small circles into it.
Patton melted, taking in shaking breaths.
"It's okay now," Janus whispered. "You're not alone anymore."
Patton shook with a small sob, and Janus kept holding him, continuing to whisper comforting sayings in his ear.
Eventually, Janus tucked Patton into his bed, since he fell asleep fairly quickly.
"Sweet dreams." He whispered quietly as he turned off the light.
---
Logan hadn't seen Patton in days.
Well, it shouldn't be concerning, really. Everyone had been avoiding him for days. But eventually, Patton started skipping making their breakfast, which he did everyday, even if he would eat alone, and he hadn't been knocking on Logan's door lately.
So, Logan started, uncharacteristically, worrying.
He made his way to Patton's bright, sky blue, door. He knocked sharply, one, two, three.
...No answer.
Logan knocked again, a little faster.
No answer.
"Patton?" Logan called. "Are you in there?"
Once again, no response.
"If you don't answer, I'm coming in." He warned.
Silence.
"...Okay, I'm coming in." Logan said, slowly opening the door.
The room was empty - well, as empty as Patton's realm of nostalgia could be - but there wasn't anyone in it.
Well, that was odd. If Patton wasn't in his room, where was he?
Logan quickly moved to search every inch of the light's mindpalace, looking for any sign that Patton might have been there.
But he was nowhere.
Logan eventually convinced himself to ask Roman and Virgil, very reluctantly, to help him find Patton.
Logan went to Virgil's room first, seeing as it would be easier to convince Roman if Virgil was on his side.
He approached the dark purple door, and knocked in his signature pattern.
"Not in the mood." Logan heard a muffled voice say.
"Virgil, I require your assistance, so if you could come out of your living area and help, that would be appreciated." Logan spoke in a faster voice than he usually would. It was probably from the repressed panic.
He heard some shuffling behind the door, then it opened to reveal a disheveled Virgil. His hoodie was crumpled, his eyeshadow was smeared, and he looked like he had just woken up.
"What do you need me for?" Virgil asked in an annoyed tone.
"I've made a concerning observation: Patton has been missing for the past couple of days, I've searched through almost the entire mindpalace, including his room, and I still am unable to locate him. Thomas is still acting normally - well, as normally as he can when he's having these emotional conflicts - so I doubt that Patton has 'ducked out', but since I am unable to find him, I am fearing the worst-"
"Logan, slow down!" Virgil exclaimed, and Logan had realized that he was rambling rather quickly.
"Ah- Apologies, Virgil. I fear I am quite 'shaken up' because of this."
Virgil sighed. "It's okay, you were just spiraling. Are you absolutely sure that Patton is missing?"
Logan adjusted his tie. "Yes, I haven't found him anywhere."
Virgil swore under his breath and ran a hand through his hair. "'Kay, what do we do?"
"I suggest convincing Roman to help, considering it would be easier to locate Patton if all three of us were looking for him."
Virgil sighed. "Alright. Yeah, let's do that." He agreed.
They made their way across the hall to Roman's extravagant room, and knocked on the deep red door.
"I'm not hungry!" A voice immediately responded from the other side of the door.
"It's us, Roman." Logan replied.
There was some various noises of papers flying and chairs scraping on a floor before Roman opened the door.
Roman looked like his normal, princely self, but neither Virgil or Logan were believing it.
"Hey! What's goin' on?" He asked.
"Uh- something's wrong." Virgil said simply before staring at the ground, playing with his hoodie strings.
Roman's smile fell. "Isn't everything already wrong?"
"Well, you may be right, but we have more...unsettling news."
Roman gestured for Logan to go on.
Logan cleared his throat. "Patton is- well he's missing, and we don't know where he is."
"...oh." Roman replied. "That's...not good."
"Yeah...we need to find him." Virgil stated.
"Which is precisely why we came to get you, Roman. Will you help us find him?"
Roman thought for a second. "...Was I the only one ignoring him?" He asked quietly.
Logan and Virgil both made various expressions of sadness and guilt.
"Was I?" Roman repeated.
"No." Virgil answered. "I didn't open the door when he came by, either."
"I did the same." Logan said quietly.
"Oh. So we're all at fault, then."
"It seems that way."
Virgil made a wounded noise. "Are you guys serious?! Are you suggesting he ran away? He didn't run away! He wouldn't run away!"
"Then where is he Virgil?!" Roman exclaimed. "He ran away from us because we were terrible to him! What other explanation is there?!"
Virgil sputtered, before his eyes went wide. "What if they took him?"
Logan furrowed his brows. "What if who took him?"
Roman's eyes also went wide. "You don't think the dark sides would kidnap him, do you?"
"I-I wouldn't put it past them..." Virgil answered.
Logan pinched the bridge of his nose. "I understand that Janus and Remus can be...extreme, but kidnapping? That seems unlikely."
"But did you check the dark side?"
Logan didn't have a comeback.
"We have to go to the dark sides," Roman decided. "We need to get him back."
Virgil nodded, and Logan sighed.
"I'm afraid I have to agree," Logan started. "But, I don't want to resort to violence too quickly." He glared at the two of them. "We need to negotiate first, alright?"
Roman and Virgil slumped. "Alright, that's fair."
"Satisfactory. Shall we get going, then?"
---
Patton had been with Janus and Remus for a couple of days now.
It was...a lot better than it was when he was a kid.
No one shoved him into walls, or stole his food. No one put curses on him as 'pranks', and no one talked to him like he didn't know anything. And Janus and Remus were actually being really nice considering what Patton had done.
It was refreshing to not have people avoid him in common areas as well. With no weird stares or awkward interactions. He just felt overall better than he had in a long time.
But, with every happy moment, came a new bad thought. At least, that's how Patton thought the saying went, he didn't know for sure.
Sure, Patton was feeling great, but new and old thoughts kept occupying his head.
Did he really deserve all of this? Was it selfish of him to come back here after he messed everything up? Was he ruining everything by running off again?
Patton wished these stupid thoughts didn't plague him all the time, he would be a lot more productive if they didn't.
He knew he should probably talk to Janus, or even Remus about this, but he didn't want them to think that he didn't appreciate what they've done for him!
The other part of Patton's brain knew that that was stupid, he knew that not talking about his dreaded feelings was a really flawed plan, but that didn't stop the other side of his brain from thinking that.
"You've got something on your mind." Janus had stated, still focused on cracking an egg into the cookie dough batter.
"What? No, I'm fine." Patton knew it was a weak lie as soon as it came out of his mouth.
"I didn't say you weren't." Janus countered, a small smirk on his face.
Well dang, he's got Patton there.
Patton just continued setting up the parchment paper on the tray, avoiding Janus' eye contact as much as possible.
"Would you like to not talk about it?" Janus asked, now looking at Patton's face.
Patton sighed. "Do I have to?" He asked, looking at Janus with pleading eyes.
Janus chuckled softly at Patton's face. "Only if you want to, Sunlight, but I think you would feel better if you did."
Patton's heart fluttered at the familiar pet name, but sunk at the thought of talking about his bad thoughts.
He sighed. "You're probably right...I just feel-"
*BANG*
The front door suddenly slammed open, revealing Roman, Logan, and Virgil on the other side.
Roman's angry eyes landed on Patton and Janus simply baking some cookies.
Roman dramatically pointed to Janus. "Fiend! Unhand our Froggy Father Figure!" He shouted.
Janus immediately put his hands up to show his 'surrender', but his face was only of annoyance.
Logan pinched the bridge of his nose. "What did I say about violence?"
"Patton! Are you okay?!" Virgil quickly asked.
"I-I'm fine? What are you guys doing here?"
Logan, Roman, and Virgil all looked at each other, then back to Patton.
"...To save you?" Roman answered.
"Wha- save me from what?" Patton asked, confusion seeping into his expression.
"From the dark sides?" Virgil stated as if it were a question.
"Ah yes, because we are definitely violent and angry enough to kidnap someone." Janus said sarcastically.
"Alright, well, since Patton seems fine, I think it's safe to assume that he isn't actually kidnapped?" Logan said, glaring at the other two.
"But, if you weren't kidnapped, why are you here?" Virgil asked.
"Cause y'all are a bunch of a**holes!" Remus exclaimed, suddenly entering the kitchen area with a wicked (but faked) smile.
"Remus-" Patton started.
"What? You guys ignore Patton for weeks and just expect him not to get offended? You guys are more terrible than I am!"
The three of the 'light sides' looked at each other again.
"Patton?" Virgil asked. "Did you really...run away?"
Patton didn't know what to say. What was he supposed to say? He didn't want to hurt their feelings! Should he lie? No, Janus and Remus would only tell everyone the truth. Would they be hurt?
Who was he kidding, of course they'd be hurt! He left them! He was avoiding them just like-
Just like they were avoiding him.
...Forget it. Forget feeling unworthy, forget feeling selfish, forget about ruining everything! Everything's already ruined! He might as well get angry, cause he sure as heck deserves it!
"Yeah." He choked out. "Yeah, because everyone was avoiding me, and I was alone with my thoughts for too long, and everyone was mad at me when they wouldn't even let me explain!" He yelled as tears rolled down his face.
That happened when he got mad or upset. He cried. He didn't want to cry, but he cried with any strong emotion he had: happiness, sadness, fear. Anger was no exception.
"No one wanted to be around me 'cause of my stupid choices, but no one ever helped me make a decision! E-Everyone just told me to choose something and didn't help me!" He started sobbing. "No one- n-no one-"
He gasped for air. Everyone was looking at him, he didn't want them to look at him anymore, he just wanted to sink into his room and cry into his pillow like he always did when things got hard. God, why did they keep staring at him?! Did he do something wrong? Did he mess up again? Will someone please tell him if he messed up again-?!
Someone was saying something to him, but he couldn't hear it, he couldn't hear anything, only his own heartbeat, which was going fast, probably faster than it should have been, but he couldn't worry about that right now, he should worry about why he can't breathe-
"Patton, breathe!" A deep and loud voice cut in, basically forcing Patton to listen and take air into his lungs.
Patton shakily took in a few breaths, noticing that he was sitting on the floor with everyone around him.
Virgil was directly in front of him, holding his hands and tapping to a specific rhythm that Patton recognized as the rhythm he used when Virgil had panic attacks.
Behind Virgil was Roman and Logan, both looking at him with worried expressions.
On his sides were Janus and Remus, both putting a hand on each if Patton's shoulders.
Great, he embarrassed himself by crying in front of them while he was supposed to be yelling at them.
"Patton," Janus called from his side. "Are you okay?"
Patton almost laughed because, no, he was obviously not okay.
He didn't laugh though, instead choosing just to nod.
"Do you need anything?" Logan asked. "Water, perhaps?"
Unfortunately for Logan, Patton was still angry.
"An explanation, an apology, something."
Everyone was silent for a moment.
"I..." Logan started. "I was just upset that I was being ignored, so I ignored everyone else..." He admitted quietly. "I realize now that doing that only doubled the amount of emotional pain...I'm sorry."
"I was in the imagination, trying to...be a better hero." Roman added, staring at the ground. "I was trying to become worthy of being around you."
Before Patton could say anything, Virgil spoke up as well.
"I was just angry." Virgil furrowed his brows. "I don't even know if I have a reason, I was- am, just angry. Angry at you, angry at Janus and Remus, angry at myself. I don't know why, and I don't want to be angry anymore. I'm so sorry, Pat."
Patton almost broke down crying again, and he probably would've if not for the fact that he cried all of his tears already.
Some other emotion bubbled inside him, and before he could stop it, it spilled out.
"I lied to all of you." He stated simply, and suddenly all eyes were on him again.
Janus squeezed his shoulder. "Patton, you don't have to tell them now, you can wait."
"No, they deserve to know." Patton defended. He took in a breath before continuing. "I lied for years about...everything. I'm not- not a-" He gulped. "I'm a dark side."
Silence. Complete silence for almost a minute. Patton was about ready to sink out before someone finally spoke.
"Oh." Virgil said. "Oh- oh, you're mystery side."
"What?" Roman asked, either ignoring or not processing Patton's confession. "What's 'mystery side'?"
"Me and Remus thought there was another dark side because of Janus' weird behavior, but we thought they were dead..." Virgil looked back to Patton, making him nervous. "But you left like I did, didn't you?"
Patton only nodded weakly.
Logan, who had been lost in thought this whole time, spoke up. "You're not actually Morality." He stated.
Patton gulped. "Y-Yeah. I'm... Well it's not important right now-"
"No." Roman interrupted. "You let me follow every decision you've ever made because I thought you knew every answer, 'cause you were Morality. I want to know who you really are." He demanded. "Please."
"You're right." Patton agreed. "I'm actually...Selflessness." He admitted. "But not like, normal selflessness, I'm more...'extreme'. More... unhealthy."
Everyone looked surprised, but not shocked. It wasn't very surprising, if you thought about it. All Patton did was try to give to others, it would make sense that that was his function.
"Why didn't you tell us?" Logan asked suddenly, breaking the silence. "We wouldn't have been upset with you."
"But...you guys hate dark sides. A lot." Patton said, and everyone visibly cringed at that.
Roman nodded grimly. "He's right, Logan. We haven't exactly given the dark sides a warm welcome."
"You can say that again." Virgil mumbled under his breath.
"Yes, because you were so much better than them, Virgil." Janus refuted.
"Patton, we're so sorry for making you feel like you couldn't trust us." Roman changed, getting on his knees and taking one of Patton's hands gently. "And we're sorry for all we wronged you for." Logan and Virgil made noises of agreement.
Patton looked down at their hands. "I'm sorry too-"
"No, don't be." Logan interrupted. "You shouldn't have to endlessly apologize when we have already forgiven you."
Patton smiled, and it turns out he did have some extra tears after all.
Suddenly he was embraced in a giant group hug, being surrounded by his famILY. He almost sobbed as he realized he hadn't had a group hug in many months.
He didn't ever want to let go.
---
Janus watched as Roman and Logan set up for a movie night, and as Virgil and Patton cuddled on the couch.
It surprised him. Not the movie night, or the cuddling part, but the fact that he and Remus had been invited to join.
"So," Remus said, getting popcorn out if the microwave besides Janus. "Will you ever tell him?"
Janus looked back at the couch to see Patton laugh at something Roman had said. Watching the way his face lit up at the simple interaction. It made Janus smile, knowing that Patton was probably the happiest he's been in months.
"No." Janus obviously lied. "But obviously I will tell him right now. He needs some time to rest."
Remus hummed, pouring the popcorn into a bowl and pouring some Reese's Pieces inside. "When you do I'll be right here. And I know Patton isn't going anywhere, either."
Janus silently thanked Remus before going back to staring at Patton, and watching him get into a cuddle pile with everyone.
Yeah, he loved him. So much. He would do anything to see Patton smile like this everyday.
His Sunshine.
~~~~~
Yea, I hate this part a lot more than the first but sjjdjdj idc at this point I'm just glad I can post it.
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#sanders sides#sanders sides fanfic#sanders sides fic#sanders sides fanfiction#moceit#ts patton#ts janus#patton angst#janus angst#actually its kinda everyone angst#platonic drlamp#ts logan#ts virgil#ts roman#ts remus#dark side!patton#kawaiikat54 fic
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The Woes Of An Emo
Summary: It's about time they figure this out. All it took was a mental breakdown.
Warnings: Mental breakdown, swearing, crying, miscommunication, confusion, kissing. Tell me if I need to add anything else!
{Masterlist} {Previous}
Chapter 8: Oh That Took Way Too Long.
~~~~~
Roman sat in the corner of the dressing room, hair sticking out wildly, makeup smeared from tears, outfit crumpled, phone by his ear, and sobs shaking his entire body, but he still smiled at Virgil.
Virgil took in a shaky breath. "I-" the words got caught in his throat.
Roman's sad smile disappeared as he ended the call. "Why-" His voice cracked. "Why did you have to do that?"
Virgil felt sick. "W-What?"
Roman got a little angrier as he glared at the ground. "Why did you-you- f**k." He swore quietly. "Why did you take me on the date if you knew? You- you knew, right?"
"K-Knew?" Virgil was operating on 1% brain function at the moment; he was barely breathing.
"Knew that I liked you, knew that-that I was Prince." The tears were loose again. "Knew that you had your own boyfriend."
Now Virgil was completely lost. "What? I- I mean yeah, I knew you liked me -you told me that part- but I didn't know you were Princey! If I knew that I would've said yes!" Virgil said before he could stop himself.
Roman stopped shaking to look confused instead, tears ceasing for a moment. "...What about your boyfriend?"
"Boyfriend?! What made you think I had a boyfriend?!"
Roman stood to talk to Virgil better. "You said you liked someone else! A-And your phone call at the mall! You told someone you loved them!" He said defensively.
Virgil took three seconds to let that process. "That was my dad! Not my boyfriend! Are you insane?!"
"No. You are. You-you think this is funny, don't you?"
"What about this would be funny?"
"I don't know, maybe me making a fool out of myself thinking I had a chance."
"I'm not playing you, I swear."
"That's just rich, Virgil, totally believable."
"What can I say to make you believe me?"
"Nothing!"
"Why?!" Virgil was slowly losing his reasoning skills.
"Because why on Earth would anyone ever like me?! It was foolish of me to even think that you would say yes!" Roman was crying again as he yelled. "Why would you ever like me now? After seeing me like this?"
Virgil was stunned for a moment. What was he supposed to do? Roman wouldn't believe a word he said so how was he supposed to convince him?
...Well, actions speak louder then words, right?
"...F**k anxiety." Virgil walked towards Roman, grabbed him by his t-shirt, pulled him down, and kissed him.
...He was kissing him.
...oh my god he was kissing him.
It was at this moment when Virgil's anxiety returned, and he was about to panic and apologize when Roman grabbed Virgil's waist and kissed him back.
It wasn't how Virgil imagined it would be. It was hot and rushing, yet also nervous and gentle. There wasn't any fireworks or music in the background, just Virgil and Roman. Which was all he needed. Just the two of them. Together.
Virgil reached up to card his fingers through Roman's hair and cup his face with the other hand. He brushed his hand over Roman's cheek when he realized that Roman was still crying.
He pulled away from the amazing kiss to look at Roman. "Are you ok?"
Roman sighed. "Just...confused."
"About?" Virgil asked, still stroking Roman's cheek, making them both blush.
"Well...did you like Roman or Prince?"
"Oh- well- uh- I guess both? I mean, I've liked Princey for probably a year now so..."
"So-" Roman laughed. How could he laugh at a time like this?! "You had a crush on me, and I had a crush on you, but we never realized that we were the same people?"
Virgil let it sink in for a moment and laughed a little too. "Yeahahah we did." They both laughed together.
Until Roman wasn't laughing anymore.
He started simultaneously sobbing and laughing, his body beginning to shake again.
Virgil hugged Roman tight, slowly rocking Roman back in forth while he cried into Virgil's shoulder, raking a hand through Roman's hair, silently hoping that it was doing at least something to help.
"I'm-" Roman gasped for some air. "I'm sorry, I-I thought that-"
"Shhhhhhh." Virgil interrupted. "It's ok. I'm sorry that I was literally blind."
Roman chuckled through the tears. "We both were for awhile."
The stood there for a couple of minutes, trying to calm each other down.
Virgil looked to Roman. "How did you know anyway? That I was anxiety."
Roman looked Virgil in the eyes. "Well, heh, I heard Patton call you 'Virge' and I realized it sounded like your username...Then I realized it was a fricking pun."
Virgil chuckled again. "Yeah, I thought it was funny."
"It was." Roman smiled at him, and all Virgil could think was 'Roman. Smile. Cute.' "But I didn't want to assume, so I...I called you Hot Topic."
Virgil blushed. "Oh. Yeah, heh, I kinda just replied as a reflex to be honest."
Roman and him chuckled together again.
Roman hid his head in Virgil's shoulder again, melting into his touch.
"You ok?" Virgil asked quietly, resuming carding through Roman's hair.
"Not really, but you're helping."
"Anything else I can do?"
"Just-" Roman took a big breath. "Everyone thinks that I'm the strong one, but I can barely even handle something being...wrong with me."
"Roman, nothing is wrong with you, you're perfect the way you are."
"No, I'm not. I have all these imperfections and-and I can't fix them."
"Roman." Virgil started, looking back to Roman again. "Your imperfections are what make you you. Your imperfections, no matter what they are, make you unique, and I love that."
Roman's emerald eyes shone with tears and hope. "I love you."
Virgil blushed hard. "I-I love you too. A lot."
Roman chuckled. "Are you still one of those people who doesn't want to be my boyfriend?"
Virgil grew even more red, remembering their conversation from what felt like forever ago. "N-No." He admitted sheepishly.
Roman chuckled at him again. "Then kiss me again, Friend On The Other Side."
Virgil giggled and obliged, being in the moment for once instead of worrying about ahead. Why would he need to worry when he had everything he wanted in this moment?
All of their problems melted away as they just enjoyed having each other. Finally relaxed and content and loved.
Virgil pulled away from Roman. "What are we gonna say to Pat and Logan?"
"Why don't we just wait for them to find out?" Roman said with a teasing smirk.
Virgil laughed. "God, you're so annoying."
"You know you love me."
"Unfortunately."
Roman and Virgil continued to flirt and tease and maybe kiss some more, but whatever happened next was their moment. It belonged to them, and no one else needed to know. They were all they needed.
The End.
~~~~~
Credit to @weweregoddesses and @thefingergunsgirl for helping edit this chapter!
And here is our final chapter!!!!!!! I really hope this was a satisfying ending, I'm not very good at ending fics lol! But I want to thank everyone who wanted to read this fanfiction, this is my longest taglist so far, and the amount of people that loved this really makes me feel like I did something well. I really hope that y'all enjoyed this experience, and I promise I have more fics where this came from!
Also, I may or may not have an extra TWOAE chapter in the works...as a treat.
Once again, thank you so much! Y'all mean the world to me!!!!
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Reblogs are appreciated!💖
#sanders sides#sanders sides fic#sanders sides fanfic#sanders sides fanfiction#kawaiikat54 fic#twoae fic#the woes of an emo fic#sanders sides high school au#ts virgil#ts roman#virgil sanders#roman sanders#prinxiety fic#prinxiety
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The Woes Of An Emo
Summary: Virgil is an idiot, and a pining one at that.
Warnings: Swearing, school shooter mention. Tell me if I need to ask for anything else!
{Masterlist}
Chapter 1: How Did He Get Himself Into This Situation?
~~~~~
Virgil always had a hard time making friends. That was a fact. He knew that already.
Why? The amount of things that can make or break a friendship. Eye contact, saying the right thing, beliefs, time, how you look, talking in general, all that good stuff. It was frustrating and nerve racking.
That's why highschool is such a nightmare. You can only survive if you're "popular". And to be popular, you have to have friends. And to have friends, you have to be popular. It's an endless loop of torture!
Speaking of torture, Virgil was just about to walk into this prison cell his first class, when he got a message from his only real friend. An online friend.
Online friends were significantly easier to make. No eye contact, you can actually think of what to say before speaking, and they won't judge you on how you look. It's so much easier!
princeofyourdreams: Good luck on your english essay!
Virgil smiled at his phone and quickly responded back.
onthevirgeofananxietyattack: thanks! Good luck wooing your boyfriend ;)
princeofyourdreams: haha very funny! Hopefully he will be my boyfriend tho. I mean, who wouldn't want to be my boyfriend?
onthevirgeofananxietyattack: i could think of a few people
Virgil didn't want to admit that he wasn't one of those few. But Princey already had his eyes on someone who he could actually see, and from what Virgil's heard, the lucky guy was very attractive.
princeofyourdreams: wow. If you could see just how attractive I am, you would change your mind!
onthevirgeofananxietyattack: oh im sure. maybe if i could actually see u i would change my mind, tho i doubt that
princeofyourdreams: well, you know very well that my parents wont let me! Im just so beautiful, that everyone would be looking for me! and gee thanks
onthevirgeofananxietyattack: right. anyway i gotta go. tell me how the confession goes! i cant wait to hear about how broken your heart will be
princeofyourdreams: And I can't wait to hear about the F you get on your essay!
onthevirgeofananxietyattack: yea F to u too
They weren't being mean to each other, that was just how their friendship always was. Of course, boundaries were set thanks to Virgil having a mental breakdown and actually having to get Princey to call him and actually needing to hear Princey's voice in order to calm down. But it was fine in the end.
---
Unfortunately, Princey would be delighted to know that Virgil got a C on his essay. Of course, Princey would comfort him, but not until he was done laughing.
The school day went by pretty normally, though. Well, except for fourth period. Roman King, the most popular musical theater kid in school, kept staring at him for some reason. It was kind of creepy, but Virgil knew he was probably just judging Virgil silently, so he didn't think anything of it.
Pretty soon, the long day of school was over and Virgil could finally go home!
Or, he was trying to, before he got stopped in the main hallway.
He turned around to see who tapped him on the shoulder and- WHAT?!
It was Roman King. Why would he want to talk to Virgil?! Unless he got Virgil confused with another purple clad emo. Was this about fourth period?
"Hey, uh..." Roman looked extremely nervous, which was really weird considering that Roman wasn't even nervous during the school shooter drill, and everyone was nervous during that. The principal was an a** and didn't tell anyone that it was a drill, and instead let everyone believe that they might die. Yeah, that was fun. But even during that, Roman was the one who blocked the door instead of hiding. Virgil kind of admired him for that. But talking to Virgil made him nervous?! No way.
"Yes?" Virgil was starting to get a little impatient. It wasn't because he didn't like Roman, Roman was an ok guy, it's just that Virgil really wanted to get home so he could talk to Princey.
"Sorry, um, I just wanted to ask if you wanted to do something...sometime? Like, with me- uh- like, just us, doing something? Together?"
What?
"Are you...asking me on a date?" Virgil wasn't sure if this was a trap or not. Roman was a great actor, but this felt way too real.
"I- yeah. If-if you want to, obviously. I mean, why would you go if you didn't want to, that's just- sorry I'm rambling." Oh my god. Roman King just asked Virgil Picani on a date.
ROMAN KING JUST ASKED VIRGIL PICANI ON A DATE!
Was that why he was staring at him in fourth period? Holy s**t.
Did Virgil want to? I mean, he has a crush on his best friend, who probably lives hundreds of miles away, and already has a crush on someone else, but...Roman is really nice, Virgil couldn't deny that.
"Sure." SURE?! Virgil, what are you thinking?! What about Princey?!
"O-Oh! Really?" Roman's face immediately lit up. Oh no. It was really cute. How could Virgil fall for another guy this quickly? Was he that desperate?
"Uh, yeah, could be fun or whatever..." Virgil was mostly just mumbling to himself, but Roman seemed ecstatic.
"Ok! Uh, here!" Roman handed Virgil a small note card that had a phone number on it. "Here's my number! Uh, text me later?"
"Yeah." Oh my god, Virgil, no.
"Awesome! Talk to you soon!" Roman ran out of the hallway towards the buses.
Oh god. What had Virgil just gotten himself into?
~~~~~
{Next}
So heres the first chapter! I'm gonna try (key word, try) to have an update schedule of every Saturday! It will probably fall apart eventually, but I'll try not to!
Thank you all for wanting to read this series! I hope I don't disappoint! And I will rewrite that last chapter of Imperfect FamILY I swear-
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Reblogs are appreciated!💖
#kawaiikat54 fic#twoae fic#the woes of an emo fic#sanders sides#sanders sides fic#sanders sides fanfic#sanders sides fanfiction#prinxiety#prinxiety fic#ts virgil#ts roman#virgil sanders#roman sanders
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