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kelmcdonald · 2 years

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New Year! New Stuff!

New Post has been published on https://kelmcdonald.com/news/new-year-new-stuff/

New Year! New Stuff!

Hey all! Happy New year! It’s been awhile since I sent out one of these. I’ve had a lot of going on and kept just putting writing newsletters off. What have I been doing? Well for one, I put the finishing touches on Woman in the Woods and Other North American Stories. That kickstarter finished out at the most funded comic anthology on twitter! HUZZAH!

And didn’t have too long to celebrate, I jumped into helping run another Iron Circus Kickstarter, Real Hero Shit by Kendra Wells! I edited Real Hero Shit all last year. It’s out in February and is a fun time all around. I even did a drawing of the main character Eugene.

Then shortly after Real Hero Shit launched on kickstarter I got a job at the publisher Seven Seas! So getting the hang of things in the manga editing process took up most of my November and December. I’m super glad because I really got to rethink how my comics are making money. This is gonna give me some flexibility and time to think about a new direction.

Why a new direction? Well, cons still aren’t back in the full swing. I don’t have a lot of faith in things bouncing back in 2022. I went to Rose City Comic Con and Emerald City Comic Con in 2021. Both were okay but not in full force, also Emerald City was right when the Omicron variant first got reported. I don’t think things will bounce back by July 2022 (which is when San Diego Comic Con, my next con is scheduled)

The other thing is Kickstarter is pivoting to blockchain. Why are they doing this? Well, seems like they don’t even know. Their statement on it was a lot of buzzwords and not a lot of content. Then their follow up to clarification was… more buzzwords and some “our blockchain is different, we swear.” Now if you are someone who doesn’t live on the internet like I do and therefore don’t know what blockchain is, here is a youtube video that does a nice job explaining it.

The short version is it is a way of coding that uses a shit ton of power. The environmental impact is too much for me and a lot of other comic artists to ignore. Part of Kickstarter’s “clarification” is them saying they are gonna use a blockchain that offsets their carbon footprint, but said blockchain is self reporting.

I mentioned a lot of other comic artists are taking this stance, as are a bunch of indie tabletop game developers. Also several of Kickstarter’s staff have quit over this. But Kickstarter is still going full steam ahead. I’ll be super surprised if they change things up. It’s frustrating because they have been so good until now and they don’t really seem to have a plan. I need to look into more crowdfunding options. Currently, I am looking into Indiegogo and Zoop. Indiegogo is more established but a lot of scammers have used it in the past, so I don’t know. Zoop is newer and takes a bigger cut, but it handles fulfillment and is comics only. So like maybe they will adjust to specific comic needs quicker? I don’t know.

I’m now gonna take this moment to post a general reminder to anyone who wants to start a webcomic in the future, please make your own website. Make sure people know about, otherwise your hard work can be wrecked by a corporation’s whim. Use all the tools, social media, whatever online that you can, but a hub/website you control is important to building something that can weather the ever changing internet.

With all these shake ups, are you wondering how you can help support me in the meantime? Well, here is my Amazon author page. Please review my books on there. It does help them sell better and get recommended to other people.

Yes, I know Amazon is also bad for the environment. But even if you don’t use Amazon or try to avoid it, you can still leave a review. Meanwhile, I’m restructuring what I’m gonna be doing with my website, patreon, and online presence. Where am I doing that? Well…

I’m gonna try to be more active on twitter again. In mid-2019, I was super burnt out on twitter. I’m not even talking about discourse or shitty people getting into fights with me on twitter. Just the act of trying to post on it regularly, to think of what to say, and stay active, I found it exhausting. Like I wasn’t burnt out on anything else, just twitter (and well other social medias). If you follow me on twitter, you might have noticed I only posted that my site updated. Those are all auto-posts from my website. After about 2 and ½ years, I think I’m ready to at least try to post stuff on there again. And I’ve got a few experiments to see if I can figure out a way to use it without getting burnt out.

I’m also gonna try to post more on instagram and my facebook page too. But those are a lower priority. Facebook because it hides posts from like 2/3s of the people that like the page unless I give them money. Instragram because my account there is newer and building something up from scratch is harder than just getting older things running again.

I’m also gonna be streaming more art. Jose Pimienta and I had a good time streaming on Wednesdays, but we are gonna move it to the evening rather than at lunchtime. I figured that it would be easier to do editing work in the morning, and then art after dinner. Since they went well, I’m also gonna be streaming on Tuesday evenings with Alina Pete. Both of those streams will start at 8pm standard time. Keeping both of these going is gonna help me balance doing art and editing.

Bones and I are also gonna get back to streaming video games again. It’s gonna be a mix of Rimworld, Crusader Kings, and Don’t Starve Together. We’ll announce which before streaming each Thursday. To get back into the groove we streamed some Rimworld on Christmas and New Years Eve. I installed the Forgotten Realms mod. It adds a bunch of races from dnd into the game, so we gave playing as the Illithid squid monsters. You can give it a watch here and here.

As for projects coming in 2022, I got a lot of plans and hope I can get some off the ground. So here are some pitches I’m working on (these are all working titles):

Next The City Between will start soon. Murky Water is gonna wrap up in mid-2022. I have a couple ideas for the next story. Two are about half way written. I’m having my Patreon backers vote on which is next. I am also gonna think about if I want to do an omnibus of City Between books. But that’s on the back burner since cons aren’t back in full force and I’m not using Kickstarter anymore.

You are the Chosen One is gonna keep going on my Patreon. I’m gonna take a break before starting Chapter 3 because I need to do some concept art. Also, Patreon isn’t really the best place to read something serialized. So I’m talking to Kevin, the guy who built my website, about making a password protected archive on my site. I want it to be easier for folks to catch up.

Blue Moon is a YA horror/romance about a non-binary teen in a small town who gets drawn to a mysterious drifter passing through town. I’m writing it and Meredith McClarren is drawing it. I got the pitch packet mostly made, but gotta tweak it a little to clarify some stuff.

As Time Goes By is a middle grade story about a town stuck in the late 50s. A modern preteen and their family pass through. Said preteen befriends a queer local preteen and the two of them try to help local kid escape the time trapped magic town. This one doesn’t have an artist and I still need to clear up some stuff. But once Blue Moon is ready to get pitch around I’m gonna focus on cleaning this one up. I’m trying to go for a Brigadon meets Pleasantville vibe.

Eat the Witch is an adult graphic black comedy about werewolves eating the rich. Kinda. Basically, it uses magic as a metaphor for inherited wealth. So the werewolves are focused on fight (and eating) a group of spellcasters based in a country club. This one I want to write and draw. I’ve posted some character designs on instragram about this. Right now I’m mostly reading some political theory nonfiction books as research. That way I can clean up the parts in the story that are currently vague and make sure it’s reinforcing the metaphor I’m aiming from. This one will probably be a while I do anything public with it. I also don’t really know where I’d send this out as a pitch.

I think that is everything. Hope you all have a good new year! Thanks for your support. Please support my patreon if you can.

#newsletter

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glacecakes · 4 years

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Alchemy Lullaby (9/?)

Of all the changes that came with living in the castle, becoming a father was not one he anticipated. When Eugene encounters a small child suffering like he did, he gives them the opportunity to grow up the way he never did… helping them both heal. (AU where Varian is 4 and gets adopted by Eugene)

Varian's growing up fast! So fast Eugene isn't sure how to handle it.

Read the rest on AO3

Me: the next chapter is gonna be something light, a collection of drabbles and headcanons Varian servers: baby hugo Me, opening up my laptop and throwing all my papers aside: BABY HUGO

Shoutout to @finnoky who makes an appearanceeeeee

“...Water is a pol….polar mole..cule… which means it… it has a slight charge,” Varian rambled, hands glossing over laminated words. He sat near a roaring fireplace, its heat seeping into tiny bones. Eugene laid sprawled out by his side, eyes shut. It was one of those cold, dreary days, so they were holed up in the library. Usually Eugene would read to Varian, happy to change his voice and act out fantastical stories. Varian hung onto his every word like gospel. Somedays, Varian would read for himself, happy to learn reading by entertaining Eugene. But today, Varian had grabbed a book the size of his head, lugged it over to their reading nook, opened it up, and began a mini lecture. Staying awake with a fireplace at your back was hard enough, but coupled with teaching? It was a losing battle, and Eugene accepted his defeat with grace.

Varian did not.

“Eugene!” Varian whined. The man gave a noncommittal hum, but that only angered his toddler more.

Thwack. “Pay!” Thwack. “Attention!” Thwack. “To!” Thwack. “MEEEEEEE!” Thwack. Thwack. Thwack.

“Ok, ok!” Eugene shrieked, holding his arms up to protect his head from any more blows. “I’m awake! I’m listening!” He sighed fondly at the big pout Varian sported. “Aw, buddy, I’m sorry, it’s just so comfy!”

Varian didn’t take kindly to that excuse, judging by the crocodile tears. He flailed his legs. “Nooooo, no sleep! Only book!”

“No sleep ever? That’s gonna be a little tricky.”

“Noooooooooo!”

Eugene finally took pity on the kid. He pulled him close and rolled onto his back so Varian was laying on top of him. He nuzzled his face into soft black hair. It still smelled faintly of blueberry shampoo. Varian was learning fast, maybe too fast if Eugene was being honest. The kid ate through book after book, quickly surpassing simple storybooks and easy nonfiction. Now he was slowly chewing through bigger nonfiction. A quick glance told Eugene he was being taught middle school chemistry. Whenever Varian wasn’t playing in the garden, or shadowing one of his favorite adults, Varian was usually here, consuming the entirety of the kids section. Most of those times, Eugene would inevitably join him, and they’d spend hours reading side by side: Varian, stories, and Eugene, parenting books.

Rapunzel called them her little bookworms, but Varian had cried when she first called him that. He didn’t want Eugene to be a worm, Eugene called him bluebird, and birds eat worms!

It was so cute, Eugene secretly hoped Varian would never grow out of kid logic.

He closed his eyes, tuning out Varian’s complaints. This truly was the life, wasn’t it?

A few days later, and Eugene’s life was ending.

Well, that’s being overdramatic.

After their library day, Eugene brought up the incident to Rapunzel, who spoke to her parents, who pulled a couple strings, and now Varian was going to every parent’s worst nightmare. Varian would be pitted against other kids in a place where children lost their individuality, their fun logic, the little quirks that made each child unique and special.

Kindergarten.

Varian, for his part, didn’t seem all that scared of Kindergarten. But to be fair, no one told him what it was, either. He’d bounced around, happily carrying his Schultüte and accepting gifts from maids and guards alike who all wanted him to have “fun at school”. Pfft. Fun at school? Impossible! Eugene hated every second of school. He stopped paying attention and look how he turned out! Totally fine!

“You sure you want to go?” Eugene asked. He gripped Varian’s hand so tight his knuckles were nearly white. Varian didn’t seem to mind all that much, skipping as they walked. For his first day Rapunzel had gifted him with a new set of clothes, a pair of blue overalls with a little flower patch on the pant leg. He wore a simple green shirt underneath it, and a backpack filled to the brim with snacks, folders, pencils, and anything else a kid could need.

“Mhm!” Varian said, jumping over a puddle.

Eugene gulped. “You sure you’re sure?” Would anyone notice if he just took Varian out for a few hours, and pretended he’d gone to school? Everything Varian needed would be in the castle, why does he need to go to school anyway?

“Yup!”

They stopped in front of a small, unimposing schoolhouse. It was painted light yellow, its windows covered in drawings and posters, no doubt done by the nefarious children inside who were only full of cruel words against Eugene’s angel of a bluebird–

“Ok bye!” Varian let go of his hand and ran to the door.

“W-wait!” That’s it!? No hug goodbye? No “I’ll miss you”? No “Please don’t leave me!” “Ok we’ll go home”?

Varian stopped before entering, confused. Then, he lit up like a beacon. “Oh!” He raced back, wrapped his arms around Eugene’s legs in a hug, and then bolted back to the school. “Bye Eugene love you!” He cried, and just like that, he was gone.

Eugene gulped, running an anxious hand through his hair. He’s just overthinking it, right? Varian would be fine! Heck, this is good, now he can have a little me time! He’s been torn between teaching guards and raising Varian, he could use a few hours off, right?

Varian felt a little bad for his dad, he seemed so… upset? Betrayed? When Varian left, but he couldn’t help it! He’d spent 6 months watching school through windows, and now he was in one! With other kids who were just like him! Not trying to steal his food, or push him around, no, they’re here to learn too!

By the time he entered his classroom, he was practically vibrating with excitement. The walls were covered with fun little decorations, ways to memorize things. The alphabet lined the top of each wall, spanning across the whole room, illuminated by sunlight. In the corner was a plush red carpet, and seated on top were a bunch of kids! He sped over, happily sitting himself front and center, facing the teacher with eager eyes.

“Good morning class, how is everyone?”

“Good morning!” Everyone parroted back, startling Varian. He didn’t know the ritual, what to do! Did he look silly? He hoped not!

Thankfully, no one called it out. Instead, the teacher turned kind eyes to him. “Everyone, we have a special friend with us today! This is Varian, can we all say hi?”

Varian blushed as a dozen tiny eyes turned to him. All of a sudden, he wanted to hide in the back, where no one was staring him down and scrutinizing him. It was like he was still in the castle, with nobility looking down at him! Maybe school was a bad idea...

“Hi!” The children all chorused, just as friendly and happy as their teacher. Varian blinked in shock, confused at the prolonged silence, before he realized what they wanted. “Hi,” he said meekly, satisfying the teacher.

“Varian, I’m Mr. Finn, let me know if you need any help, alright kiddo?” Varian nodded vehemently.

The morning passed smoothly, with Mr. Finn reading a story and practicing basic writing and math. While Varian was now an excellent reader, and easily followed the story, writing proved more challenging. He stuck his tongue out in frustration, slowly dragging the pencil down his page.

“No,” A high pitched voice chimed next to him. He glanced over. The kid next to him was staring right back. He had long blonde hair, longer than Cassie’s but shorter than Rapunzel’s. Sea green eyes shimmered behind frames. “You gotta follow the lines. See?” He held up his paper, proudly displaying a series of “d”s.

“I am,” Varian complained, gazing down at his paper. He could ask Mr. Finn, right? He said so, after all. He went to raise his hand, when the kid grabbed his arm.

“See, you start here,” Though his movements were sloppy, he held onto Varian’s arm and helped him trace out a letter. Varian blinked. That easy? He’d been doing it all wrong! His face lit up in delight.

“Thanks!” In no time, the rest of the letters were filled in. Varian may not have gotten in right away, but he was a fast learner. It only took a few more letters before the rest of the page was no problem. “I’m Varian,” He held out an arm, like he’d seen the King do.

The boy in front of him grinned, showing off a missing tooth. “I’m Hugo!” He didn’t take Varian’s hand, so the boy put it down. Oh well, maybe it’s just a castle thing.

What was Eugene so nervous about? School was fun! He already had a friend!

Eugene cried into his third helping of mashed potatoes.

“Wow this is sad. How is this any different from days when we babysit?” Cassandra asked, unimpressed. When Lance burst into the castle, insisting that she and Rapunzel come to the Snuggly Duckling and help Eugene, she’d expected a bar fight, or at least something that wasn’t… this.

Lance shrugged, taking the plate away before Eugene could make himself sick. “Because he can’t go check up on Varian, I think.” That only upset Eugene more, and he let out a tiny whine. Rapunzel, who had been rubbing his back, sped up her soothing motions.

“There there, you’ll see him in a bit,” She said. “To think, a year ago you were Corona’s most wanted thief. Now you’re a dad making a difference!”

“I’m a dad without a son,” Eugene moaned. That got him an eyeroll from Cassandra.

“He’s been like this since he got here,” Lance added. It had been slightly terrifying. Eugene had burst in, waterworks in full effect. He’d draped himself on Lance’s shoulders, just like he used to when they were kids, acting as if his son was dead and not at school.

Honestly, it was confusing. Eugene seemed so adverse to getting Varian schooling, but one of his biggest arguments about adopting Varian had been his education! He’d gone on and on about how smart Varian was during those first few days, and how he needed proper schooling, not the poor excuse of an orphanage. But now that Varian was actually in school, it was as if a switch had flipped.

Rapunzel gained a fire in her eyes, and with a small grunt, pulled him out of his seat. “Come on, Eugene, let’s go cheer you up. How does a day in town sound? Or maybe a haircut?”

“Varian needs a haircut soon,” was his response.

The quartet spent much of the afternoon in town, taking in sights and sound. Even after she’d been living here for nearly a year, Rapunzel doubted she’d ever tire of Corona and all it had to offer. But each stop seemed to only remind Eugene more of his son. First was Monty’s where Rapunzel maintained juuuust enough civility to not throttle the man when he asked Rapunzel if she would adopt Varian one day.

(She fully planned to, but that’s beside the point.)

Then came Xavier’s. The blacksmith was always kind and understanding, and after a quick explanation, he’d been happy to ignore any and all mention of children. That was, until Eugene picked up a dagger with a sigh.

“Should I teach him how to fight?”

“Eugene he’s not even 5.” Cassandra spoke with a monotone voice.

Eugene nodded. “You’re right. I should’ve started him sooner.”

He left Xavier’s with a bruised gut.

“I don’t get it!” Rapunzel cried in frustration. They’d stopped for a break by the fountain, where Eugene sat, staring off in the direction of the schoolhouse. “We’ve taken him all over town, spent the day with him, yet he’s still sad! Is he going to be like this every day Varian’s in school?”

Lance nodded, agreeing. “I thought parents were supposed to be happy when school started.”

“You know I can hear you, right?” Eugene called from his seat. At least his friends and girlfriend had the grace to look guilty. He sighed, redirecting his gaze down at the fountain water.

In all honesty, he wasn’t so sure either. He loved Varian from the bottom of his heart, but sometimes that kid truly was a handful. Not to mention it had all been so sudden, just like Rapunzel said... That’s when it hit him.

“Stability.”

The others blinked. Rapunzel tilted her head in confusion. So, he elaborated, “My entire life was just, one crazy thing after another. I didn’t stay in school, I became a thief, I ran from place to place. I never had stable housing, or income, or, or anything! And it sucked! A lot! I was constantly stressed out, even when I was in control, I kept waiting for the shoe to drop.

“I know I took Varian in because I wanted stability for him, but…” He glanced up and sheepishly smiled.

“I guess I want it for me, too.”

The school was built right next to a playground, so the children got 30 minutes outside every day. It was a simple thing, with all the basics and a large field for kids to run in. Mr. Finn stood by the school’s door, watching from afar as his class played with one another.

Hugo pulled Varian along, tugging him past the wooden playground and into the grass field. Varian had never had a friend before, was this how it worked? Regardless, he was happy to come along.

“Mr. Finn said you live in the castle, is that true?” Hugo asked, stopping in the middle of the field and squatting down into the grass. Varian followed suit, happily twirling a blade of grass between his fingers.

“Mhm! I live there with Eugene, and Cassie, and-”

“What’s the princess like?” Hugo buts in, staring with wide eyes. They were so close their noses nearly touched. Varian didn’t mind in the slightest.

“Punzel’s really nice, she lets me paint with her!” He giggled, and Hugo sat back in amazement.

“My mom says her hair is super long, is that true?”

“Suuuper long! I like to hide in it.”

“And she lets you!?”

“Yup! I always get tangled, though.” It was like clockwork: Eugene and Varian would play hide and seek, Varian would hide in her hair, Eugene would find him, he’d get stuck, and Rapunzel would shake him out. She never complained, even though Eugene always made him apologize.

“It doesn’t hurt,” She reassured them. “I would do the same!”

Hugo hums, thoroughly impressed. “My mom has really long hair too, and she lets me braid it sometimes!”

Varian gasped. “Really? She lets you?” Gosh, his momma would never let Varian let anywhere near her hair! Apparently he tugged on it as a baby. “That’s so cool!”

“Really?” Hugo’s face lit up like the sun.

“Yea! Maybe one day you can meet her!” Varian cheered, directing his gaze down to the grass. There, innocent and unassuming, a small flower grew. Its purple petals furled upwards, allowing Varian to stare right into the yellow center. The first flowers of the season!

Hugo looked up to find a flower right in front of his face, with a grinning Varian at the other end. “For you!” He said, and Hugo’s face lit up.

“Thanks!” With one fluid motion, Hugo grasped it and ate it whole. He didn’t even blink.

Varian blinked. It took a second for what just happened to register.

Then, he burst into giggles.

Eugene sighed and trudged up to the schoolhouse. As if on cue, a bell rang, and children poured out of the doors. Kids ran to their parents, who were more than happy to scoop their kids up and hear all about their day. Eugene was no exception. Varian exited, and upon seeing him, lit up and flew towards him.

Eugene caught him easily, spinning around so they were facing the others. “Hi, Varian!” Rapunzel chimed. “How was your day at school!”

“I liked it a lot!” Varian giggled. “We learned to write, and had pretzels, and, and-”

“Varian!”

They all turned to see a very nervous looking Hugo, with his cheeks flushed. “I-I just wanted to say… it was nice to meet you! And maybe we can hang out sometime soon and you can show me the castle ok bye!” He then promptly fled, back towards the arms of an exasperated older woman who was probably his mom.

“Bye Hugo!” Varian called, waving in their general direction. “That was Hugo, he’s really nice.”

“I’ll bet,” Cassandra muttered, mildly amused.

Eugene couldn’t help the beams of pride. One day in school and he’d already made a friend! That was more than he could say for his own time in school. “You’re growing up so fast,” Eugene whispered, pulling Varian close. He bounced his arms, Varian happy at the rhythm. “Don’t grow up too fast, ok? Otherwise I’d get all old and wrinkly.”

“Ah, your highness!”

Rapunzel turned to see a teacher headed their way. “I’m Mr. Finn, I was with Varian today.”

The princess beamed. “Oh, that’s wonderful, thank you! How was it?”

“He was great, princess, a delight! I look forward to seeing him in September.” Mr. Finn leaned down to Varian’s height. “I’ll see you in a few months, Varian!”

“Bye bye!” Varian responded, frowning when Eugene stilled in his bouncing.

“Wait, September?” He asked, confused. Wouldn’t he be seeing Varian tomorrow? It was Wednesday, after all.

Cassandra laughed. “Oh, we didn’t tell you?” She leaned on his arm. “Varian’s too young for kindergarten. He can’t start till the new school year, when he’ll be 5.”

Eugene paled. “So, I have to go through this… all over?” Varian cocked his head in confusion when Lance barked out a laugh, and Rapunzel covered her mouth to hide a smile. The handmaiden patted Eugene’s back in mock sympathy.

That night, Eugene cried into another serving of potatoes while Varian practiced his letters.

#tangled #tangled the series #varian #tts #varian tts #tangled eugene #eugene fitzherbert #team awesome

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fangirl-writes · 5 years

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Family Day

Ben x Mal x Reader

Part 1 Part 2 Part 4 (end)

Warning(s): None that you wouldn’t be aware of from the movie.

Notes: Part 3 is here ladies and gentlemen! This part was more difficult because I had to come up with an excuse as to why Y/N’s parent(s) couldn’t come without deciding the character(s) for you which I did not want to do. I hope you enjoy! I’m sorry it took so long!

(Let me know if you’d like to be tagged!)

Tag List: @lukes-princess @kamahriii @hxney-bunches-x @ofbadchoices @s-0-cially-awkward @underworldsheiress @chynagirl13 @pepperxnys @notawritergettingtherethough @lovepandasloves @magnet-girl

Summary: As the VKs get ready for Family Day events, Mal decides to undo her spell and Ben and Y/N decide to continue loving Mal.

“Alright class, everyone get with their partners and prepare for the waltz.”

With a smile, Ben bowed neatly, offering his hand to Y/N. Y/N fought back a smile of their own as they placed their hand in Ben’s. He led them onto the dance floor among other pairs like Chad and Audrey, Doug and Jane, and Lonnie and Anexlin (Eugene and Rapunzel’s daughter).

As Mr. Merlin began the record player, the pairs began to dance.

“Ow,” Ben winced, pulling his foot from under Y/N’s.

“Sorry,” Y/N said. “I’m a bit distracted.”

“It’s alright. Thinking about Mal?” He asked with a small smile.

Y/N looked at him sheepishly. “I can’t help it. Seems like the two of you are all I think about these days; even with the spell gone.”

Ben grinned. “Why, I’m flattered.”

Y/N rolled their eyes, but smiled softly anyway.

The night that they’d gone on their first date with Mal, the two of them had a long talk about what to do. Neither of them could deny the feelings that were still there even after the spell had washed off and all of Auradon Prep knew of their affections (that would be a hard one to explain away without getting Mal shipped back to the Isle).

So, they kept it their own little secret. They continued to date Mal and teach her what love felt like through surprises and gifts. They even got Mal to stop putting her art on school property and start putting it onto a canvas.

Y/N smiled at the memory and the twinkling in Ben’s eyes told them that he was thinking about it, too.

The two of them were shrouded into silence as they danced.

Mr. Merlin commented to them after one of their first classes that the two of them would get lost in each other’s eyes as they danced. Y/N supposed their silence this time was no different.

“Y/N...” Ben whispered, drawing himself closer to them.

“Yes?” They whispered in reply.

“I love you,”

Y/N felt their face heat up, but they replied almost immediately. “I love you, too,”

Just as it seemed the pair was going to share a kiss, Mr. Merlin stopped the record and clapped him hands. “Beautiful work! It seems you’ve all mastered the waltz. Now I think you deserve a small break and then onto the salsa! Spicing it up a little!”

Ben and Y/N had to hide their giggles as they walked over to their water bottles. Ben placed a kiss on Y/N’s cheek, making them smile.

“Ready for family day?”

“I’d say it’s going to be an interesting one.”

****

Y/N watched as Ben sang with the preforming choir, a smile on their face as Ben proudly strutted to the front of the group.

They looked over to see Belle and Beast dancing along to the song, making them chuckle a little.

Y/N’s eyes lit up as they spotted Mal with Evie, Jay, and Carlos over by the food tables, enjoying a strawberry.

“Mal!” They waved as they walked over to the group.

“Hey,” Mal said with a small smile.

“Nervous?” Y/N asked, seeing the emotion in her green eyes.

“A little. I mean it’s not everyday you meet the parents of your boyfriend and it doesn’t really help that it’s, you know, Beauty and the Beast. Plus my mom is kinda the mistress of all evil who tried to destroy people that are probably their friends, but, hey, what’s there to be nervous about?”

Y/N laughed as Mal finished her little rant. “It’s okay!” They took Mal’s arm. “They’ll love you, I promise! Let’s go.”

Y/N led them over to where Ben and his parents were getting their photos taken at a gazebo.

“Oh! By the way I have another girlfriend!” Ben exclaimed.

“Really? Why did you and Y/N break up? I always liked them.” Belle commented.

“Oh, that’s not what I meant. Y/N and I are still together we just have another partner.” Ben replied, grinning for the next photo.

The camera flashed.

“Well, that’s wonderful! Always knew our boy had a big heart.”

“One that can fit two true loves!” Beast exclaimed. “Do we know your new partner?”

“On the count of three,” the photographer said before starting to count.

“Sort of,” Ben said, waving over to his partners walking up the path. “Y/N! Mal!”

Belle and Beast’s faces fell as the photographer hit ‘three’.

“Mal! Y/N!” Ben shouted again, leaving his parents to approach the two. Belle and Beast shared a worried look.

“Mal, I wanna introduce you to my parents,” Ben said before embracing the both of them.

Ben took up the side of Mal that Y/N wasn’t occupying and squeezed her hand. “This is Mal...from the island...our girlfriend.”

“Hi!” Belle said.

“Hi...” Mal softly replied.

“I was thinking maybe she could join us for lunch.” Ben said.

Y/N brightened, looking at Mal expectantly.

“O-of course,” Beast replied uneasily. “Any friend of Ben-”

“I-I actually came with my friends...”

“Oh, well, you should invite them.” Belle said almost forcibly.

The three still standing by the food tables waved happily.

The position each was in made Y/N suppress a giggle.

“Cause the more the merrier!” Belle said again.

“Oh, okay, I’ll go grab them!” Mal said happily. Y/N could feel the anxiety in Mal fade away slowly.

“How about a game of croquet before lunch?” Beast suggested.

“Of course!” Mal replied.

“Game on!” Ben exclaimed, fist bumping his father.

“Game on.” He replied.

Ben, Y/N, and Mal turned around, Ben putting an arm around Mal’s shoulder as Y/N put an arm around her waist.

Behind them Belle seemed to feel faint.

***

Croquet seemed to be going great. Ben and Jay laughed as Carlos chased dude around the course with Y/N, Evie chatting with Belle, and Mal stood to the side, taking it all in.

“Hello there,” an elderly woman said as she approached Mal.

“Hi,” Mal replied timidly, but with a smile.

“Now, have we met?” She asked, walking around to Mal’s other side, closer this time.

Mal thought for a moment. “No, I don’t think so! I’m new. I’m sort of like a transfer student.”

“Ah,” The woman seemed to understand what Mal was saying as Audrey walked up next to her.

“Grandma!” Audrey said, taking the woman’s hand.

“Oh, Audrey dear! Give grammy a kiss!”

“Grammy?” Mal questioned, looking over at the two.

“Sleeping Beauty’s mother.” Audrey snapped.

Mal nodded in understanding.

Audrey sneered at Mal. “Grammy, I don’t think you want to be talking to this girl.”

Queen Leah seemed confused.

“Unless you feel like taking another hundred year nap.”

Mal smiled slightly, trying to shrug the issue away, but it was too late.

“You!” Queen Leah cried out.

Mal jumped back in surprise and everyone looked over at the three.

Fairy Godmother began to step forward, concerned.

“How are you here?”

Mal was confused and a little saddened by her exclamation.

“And how have you stayed so young?”

Ben and Y/N came rushing forward, Ben putting his arms around her and Y/N taking one of her hands.

“Queen Leah, it’s okay,” Ben assured. “Maleficent is still on the island. This is her daughter, Mal.”

Mal seemed to be holding in her emotions and smiled. Y/N squeezed her hand.

“Don’t you remember my proclamation to give the new generation a chance?”

Y/N smiled and Mal nodded slightly.

“A chance to what, Ben?” Leah sneered. “Destroy us?”

Mal’s face fell.

“Come on, you remember, don’t you?” Leah asked Fairy Godmother, who came closer to Leah. “The poison apples? And the spells?” This time she had turned to Belle and Beast before settling her icy gaze on Mal. “The spells. My daughter was raised by fairies because of your mother’s curse. So, her first words. Her first steps. I missed it all.”

The queen turned away from Mal, who stepped forward and began to apologize before Chad Charming stuck his big nose in the way.

“You stay away from her.” He snapped.

“Don’t do this, Chad.” Ben said, his voice threatening.

“What?” he seemed disbelieving and Y/N glared at him. “They were raised by their parents, Ben. What do you think villains teach their kids? Kindness? Fair play? No way, okay? Nuh-uh.”

Chad looked directly at Y/N and Mal. “And whatever it is you three have going on is sick.”

“Hey! Hey!” Ben said, his anger beginning to seethe out.

Chad looked at Jay. “And you enjoy hurting people.”

Jay looked crushed.

Then he settled on Evie. “And you.”

Evie felt anxious as his sneering face looked at her. “You’re nothing but a gold digger and a cheater.”

Evie brought her magic mirror to her lips. “Mirror Mirror in my hand, who’s the biggest jerk in the land?”

She raised the mirror right to Chad’s face as it showed his own reflection.

“What?” He exclaimed, pushing the mirror (and this Evie) away.

Jay took this as initiative to take action. He rushed Chad and took his vest in his hands as Evie sprayed her sleeping potion into the prince’s face, making his dose off.

Ben ushered Jay away from Chad as the other AKs attempted to wake him up.

Y/N took Mal and Evie’s hands and began leading them away from the scene before Evie took Mal’s hand from their’s, rushing away.

“Guys!” Ben called after them as Y/N came next to him, a heartbroken look on their face.

Chad finally woke up as the VKs ran away. Ben turned to his parents who had disappointed (and in Belle’s case surprised) looks on their faces.

“I feared something like this would happen.” Beast said, cleaning his glasses.

“This isn’t their fault!” Ben shouted.

“No, son,” Beast replied. “It’s yours.”

Beast took Belle away as Ben’s heart shattered. “Mom?” he asked, dejectedly. Only to be dismissed by her as well.

The other AKs hurried away, shunning Ben, leaving him practically alone.

Except for Y/N.

“Ben-” They said quietly, taking his hand.

Ben in turn took their face in his hands. “I’ll fix this.”

Y/N looked at him helplessly.

“I promise, I’ll fix this.”

***

The next day at lunch, the VKs sat alone at their table. Cold looks and broken hearts all around.

Ben walked up to the group. “Hey, guys! How is everyone?”

The group ignored him.

“Hey, listen, forget about it! It’s nothing. Forget about it, let it go.” He said, grabbing Mal’s shoulders. “Tomorrow after the coronation I promis everything will be okay.”

Disbelieving looks all around.

“I have to go,” he whispered to Mal, who gave no reaction. “I’ll see you guys later.”

Ben walked away as Y/N began to walk up, witnessing a fiasco.

“Evie, listen, I wanted to talk about earlier-”

“Doug.” Chad interjected. Y/N frowned. If looks could kill.

Evie and Doug tried to have a conversation once more before being rudely interrupted again.

Doug gave up and finally sat with the others at the next table over. (Which bad seating arrangement. I bet the AKs did it just to bully the VKs).

“How long does her think it’s going to last?” Audrey sneered, talking as if Mal didn’t hear every word. “Mal’s just the bad girl infatuation. They’ll drop her the moment they come to their senses.”

Punching Audrey in the face for that comment sounded pretty good to Y/N at that very second.

“Yeah, he’s never gonna make a villain, a queen.” Jane said, directly into Mal’s ear.

Bad choices Jane.

Y/N began to walk closer just as Mal opened her spellbook.

“Beware, forswear, undo Jane’s hair.”

Jane’s scream made it clear the spell had worked.

Mal and the other stood up. “There’s a lot more from where that came from.”

“Excuse me, who do you think you are?” Audrey quipped.

“Do I look like I’m kidding?” Mal retorted.

Y/N could practically feel the murder in her eyes.

Mal opened her book again, making the villainous AKs run away.

The four walked away and Y/N felt it best not to bother them.

Tomorrow. They reminded themselves. Tomorrow will make everything better.

At least...Y/N hoped so.

#descendants x reader #disney descendants imagine #mal x reader #mal x reader x ben #ben x reader #prince ben x reader

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whisperwillyou · 4 years

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Okay I absolutely loved the finale, i really did

But if I don’t get out my thoughts on the part I didn’t like I’m just gonna keep dwelling on them and I don’t want that

I’m gonna put this under read more though, so anyone who doesn’t want to see criticism, please feel free to ignore and scroll past <3

I really really REALLY didn’t like the imitation of the healing tear scene with Rapunzel and Cassandra.

I want to start this off by saying that in no way do I intend for this post to mean that the scene is terrible, or that the writers are bad for it, or anything like that. It’s purely me explaining my feelings about it, as well as trying to process exactly why the scene made me so viscerally uncomfortable, so I can stop focusing on it and redirect my thoughts to all the parts of the finale that I DID love.

On that note, I know I’m biased because I’m both a Eugene stan and a New Dream stan, and the fact that I minored in film studies probably doesn’t help, cause I can’t help but get super analytical about everything. But I was NOT jazzed when they paralleled the tear scene with Cassandra.

Just in general, I really dislike when emotional scenes between characters are paralleled with different people like that. In my mind, that is Eugene and Rapunzel’s moment. It’s so intrinsically tied to their characters, their feelings and experiences and their relationship. The entire film was building to that moment and it was filled with pain and sadness and love, and it hit SO WELL. I remember as a kid, absolutely sobbing as I watched this scene for the first time. And even now after having seen the movie god knows how many times, that impact is still there. So, to parallel it in a different situation with a different character on the receiving end and completely different events that lead to it just feels like an attempt to capture and reuse the emotional response from the original scene rather than creating a new one.

And the thing about parallels is they automatically link two scenes in the viewers mind. To draw attention to the similarities in two scenes is the main point of them. So, in using that same imagery for this scene, it guarantees I’m going to immediately compare the two in my mind. And to parallel one of the films climactic moments, implies that this scene is of the same caliber as the one it’s referencing, and I just can’t get behind that.

For me Cassandra’s version just comes off so much weaker when stood next to Eugene’s.

A ton of the impact in Eugene’s death comes from the fact that he actively signed his own death warrant. Eugene *chose* to die so that Rapunzel could live. The person who helped Rapunzel experience the work for the first time, is dying to make sure she gets to see more of it. And it’s all enhanced by the fact that Rapunzel COULD have saved him, she fully intended to give up her freedom, her life, to save his. Was willing to sacrifice everything for him as much as he did for her. Eugene just beat her too it.

Comparatively Cassandra’s just had less substance.

Don’t get me wrong, there’s a big weight behind the fear of losing a friend that you fought so hard to get back. But that’s pretty much all I got from it. There wasn’t much to take in with Cas’s death scene. It lasted all of five seconds, and honestly came out of nowhere.

It doesn’t really prompt any events that couldn’t have happened without it. There was already a bunch of people heavily injured/dying, including Eugene, so it’s not like Rapunzel needed that prompting to take the risk of using the combined moon and sun power. She would have done it anyway.

Plus, it’s hard to have a genuine connection or emotional response to a death when we weren’t even given a reason as to why it happened? I know that they couldn't get graphic because the show airs on a kid’s channel, I get that. But all you’d need is a shot of her getting knocked down by a wave of energy or something. Just SOMETHING to give us context for why she’s in this state.

For me, It just felt like having angst for angst’s sake. Just one more bit of added tension before the happy end. An excuse to be able to call back to one of the film’s most powerful moments.

In the end, I just think that I could have swallowed it easier if they had let it be its own thing, an independent moment between Cassandra and Rapunzel, rather than connecting it to such a titular moment in the film as well as Eugene and Rapunzel’s relationship.

Also, if I’m being honest, knowing that Cassandra spent most of this season chasing after Gothel’s love when she was fully aware of what Gothel did to both Rapunzel and Eugene. Mirroring the scene where Eugene dies to save Rapunzel from Gothel’s imprisonment and manipulation just feels… really wrong.

But seriously, if you liked the scene than good for you! I’m genuinely glad that you enjoyed it! I’m sure the Cas stans loved that little bit of extra angst. I’m in no way trying to say that no one is allowed to like this scene or get something out of it.

But I personally didn’t like the choice.

#tangled the series #tangled #rapunzel #eugene fitzherbert #tts cassandra #tangled finale #plus est en vous #tangled spoilers #negative #criticism #glad thats out of my system #fox talks

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ladyfawkes · 4 years

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New Dream/Angelic Dream - New Dream Appreciation Week - Day 4 | Hurt/Comfort

While I don’t have a specific Eugene/Rapunzel New Dream story, this one is still very New Dream-centric in its own way. Some may have seen it before but most have not. It’s very personal and dear to me and I kind of considered it appropriate, considering we’re coming upon a certain anniversary in just three days.....

“When Eugene called Rapunzel Sunshine, I felt that…”

When I began getting deeper into Tangled fandom, it wasn’t until around later October 2019. I was feeling a real hankering for more of Eugene Fitzherbert’s singing voice. Confession 2: Until Autumn 2019, I had NO IDEA that Zachary Levi had voiced Flynn Rider, both speaking AND singing!! At the time, the main thing that drew me to Flynn was his singing voice. I never forgot that. Like so many others, I fell in love with Tangled’s soundtrack and specially with “I See the Light” and “I’ve Got a Dream”, etc.

Confession 3: I’ve had a crush on Zachary Levi ever since the first episode of Chuck. Even though Chuck’s social and emotional insecurities are a rather enormously huge humorous part of the plot, the way Zac portrayed that anxiety and other types of raw emotions were real. He possesses a markedly rare ability to elicit laughter and tears within the same scene, and sometimes within the very same moment of a scene. While it’s an exceptional gift to exhibit that ability, it nearly always means that underneath it all, the reason why you can perceive this type of emotion so plainly from any given actor is because they’ve experienced those feelings on a personal level in their private lives. Nobody ever told me this, it’s something I learned through observation. It’s true of writers too…and composers. The best way to telegraph emotion through a given medium to someone else is often by having initially having experienced those emotions for yourself. It wouldn’t be until years after Chuck began that Zac would feel comfortable enough to share his mental health history with his fans…and we’d begin to learn just how deep he truly is.

With all of this in mind, I was perusing YouTube with the intent of finding more of “Flynn Rider’s singing voice” and imagine my shock & delight when a whole bunch of Tangled the Series and Tangled Before Ever After songs showed up in my search!!! Then I Looked up the fan wikia only to discover that it was none other than our dear Zachary Levi who had voiced Eugene Fitzherbert!!! I got positively thrilled and was already on Cloud Nine before I’d even begun watching it. Despite Disney’s, uh, thorny history with spinoffs, I couldn’t help but be excited as I learned most of the original cast had returned as well!!

I queued up Tangled Before Ever After and was instantly transported, instantly fell in love. I truly did not expect to be as drawn to Eugene as I was….in the film version, I wasn’t so sure about him….but I gravitated toward him immediately in the series. At first, I really didn’t know why. The feeling seemed familiar somehow and again….I didn’t know why. I couldn’t figure it out.

As I watched the first few episodes, I was constantly live-gushing (that’s akin to live-tweeting, only over Messenger instead) about the show with my friend Samara as I watched; Sammeh is also a Tangled superfan. I was continually talking about how it was the Disney’s best spinoff I had ever seen, how I was shocked that they cast SO MANY original cast members, original songwriters, etc. I can unequivocally state I haven’t loved an animated series this much in my life, even as a child. Then I was describing how much I could not get over the healthy, loving relationship portrayed between Eugene and Rapunzel. As I sat describing it, I suddenly said, “Oh my gosh. Sammeh…..” And it caused me to freeze. Even though Sam had known my former fiancé just as long as we’d known each other, I didn’t know if Sam would think I was nuts for suggesting that certain aspects of Eugene’s personality reminded me of Anthony. After a long pause, I typed as much to her, “I don’t know if I should say this to you…..” yet I needn’t have worried, because Sam completed my thought for me: “You’re gonna say he’s like Anthony.” I was so surprised I said, “YES!!! How did you know I was gonna say that?!”

”Easy. Because I’ve seen it too.”

In spite of myself, I wept after she said that. So I wasn’t just imaging it. I’m getting teary-eyed now just thinking about it.

The love between Eugene and Rapunzel reminds me of the love I had with my Anthony. Anthony was not intimidated by my inner strength, we took turns rescuing each other, he was willing to listen to me talk for hours and hours and hours and I did the same with him, we took turns forever teasing one another, we couldn’t ever stay angry with each other, we always talked things out. He was forever encouraging my talents and dreams. We hung out with an unlikely, rag-tag group of friends. And especially the way Eugene caresses Rapunzel’s face, kisses her forehead….and spontaneously says _the most heart-melting romantic things….._that was just like my Anthony. And of course, he called me “The light in my life….My Sunshine.”

Now….while Anthony didn’t die while rescuing me from an enemy, his was a sacrifice of a different kind….for shortly before he passed, he was experiencing far too much mental strife….never once did he self-disclose this, though….and unfortunately, we didn’t learn until after the fact. It became apparent he felt his only way out was to take his own life.

Needless to say, I crawled into a very dark place after he died. I tried very hard not to….but over the prior 18 months I’d already lost so very much. I’d lost a job, loss of place to live, for months, I was being literally starved by my abusive-prior-ex-boyfriend ….I just shriveled up inside due to self-doubt, self-hatred, and I couldn’t speak about anything.

Even from 1800 miles away at the time, Anthony managed to be the one person to draw it all out of me. (I was estranged from most family at the time – with good reason) and I told him everything….and he listened to all of it, never interrupting, never judging, never being anything but his amazing self. Somehow, after two years of friendship and listening to one another, Anthony had fallen in love with me….even though all of the garbage I told him. To this day, I do not know what he saw in me. But something inside knew that if I could just strive to put good things surrounding that fateful date, its anniversary would lose its sting and I could heal and live the way Anthony would’ve wanted me to live. Although I’d described some of the lowlights, I’ve definitely had moments in my life that have filled me with much love and light.

I’ve been so very scared to type all of this out, put it all out there, for fear of being…..judged. Ridiculed. You know how the internet can be……naturally there’s a lot more to this story that I would like to share with you yet this has already become prohibitively lengthy.

The whole point is to say that it’s been nearly 14 long years since I last heard Anthony’s light sweet southern drawl. And through the magical medium of Rapunzel’s Tangled Adventure, this show effectively allowed me the heartwarming and bittersweet chance to feel a small part of his love within my life again. I don’t know quite how it happened….but happen it did….right when I needed it. Anthony and I were very flirty and silly and ridiculous as a couple, just the way you would expect two twitter-pated people to be….the way Eugene calls Rapunzel “Sunshine” and caresses her cheek….the way he looks at her ….with his heart is full of so much love that it touches his warm brown eyes….those things remind me most of Anthony. Hopefully you can see why it’s been so difficult to, ah, self-disclose this information about myself.

So…..thank you for that from the bottom of my heart, Disney, Chris Sonnenburg, Shane Prigmore, Tara Nicole Whitaker, Tom Caulfield, Stephen Sandoval, Zachary Levi, Mandy Moore, Eden Espinoza, James Iglehart, Jeremy Jordan, Kevin Kleisch, Alan Menken, Glenn Slater, Anna Lencioni, and anybody else whom I’ve missed…..

#New Dream appreciation week #new dream week #hurt / comfort #personal story #personal anecdotes

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xmxisxforxmaybe · 5 years

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28 & 61-Snafu, let's go with smutty if you can. But I'll leave it in your hands. 😉👍

Snafu and smut . . . not an IF, but a WHEN ; ) And I feel like I should maybe apologize bc this is just filthy and it’s filthy in first person so I could try something a little different.

Warnings: Full smut ahead, so under 18s, away with ye!

* * * * *

To say I was pissed was an understatement.

First of all, I had to look at Merriell, or rather, Snafu as he is called continually in front of this lot, in a tuxedo all night from ten tables away. He was so busy being a good groomsman for Eugene that he didn’t have time to even acknowledge me. And, even from a distance, it was clear Mer loved this kind of attention, loved being the one to crack jokes and get big laughs.

Being a good friend to Gene on his wedding day was not what made me angry. What pissed me off was that he looked so good in that tux. Normally, I felt that Merriell had the strongest libido out of the two of us, but tonight, I felt like my skin was on fire, like there was this constant, burning ache that needed to be satiated. And every time I looked at him, smiling, laughing, teasing Gene, I got so antsy, like I just wanted to grab Mer and drag him into a closet.

God, I’m such a slut!

I blame him entirely for this. The pleasure that man gives me really has made me a slut for him. And right now, this slut is none too happy that Merriell has a wispy little Southern belle as a dance partner.

I know, I know. Groomsmen duties, but come on. Now I have to watch him being polite, throwing that smile at that poor little girl who looks like she’s been hit by a thunderbolt, gazing up at Mer with loving eyes.

Merriell Shelton would destroy her; he’s entirely too much man for a delicate, sheltered flower like her.

God, I want him to destroy me right now—just take me. Right on the dance floor. We can make history and get arrested for fucking like animals in the middle of a proper, Southern wedding.

What the fuck is he doing now? Jesus. He’s trying to kill me.

As if watching him dance wasn’t bad enough now he’s eating cake. What I wouldn’t give to be serving him my cake right at this very—fuck me raw. There’s icing on the corner of his mouth. I watch him take another bite, then another before he notices it, snaking out his tongue first, then reaching one those strong, perfect fingers up to swipe off the frosting and—

Merriell Shelton is making eye contact with me as he puts that goddamn finger of his in his mouth and sucks.

I’m going to kill him.

But only after he’s nearly fucked the life out of me.

* * * * *

Pacing. I’m pacing in our hotel room because after that little shit licked the cake icing off his finger, he winked at me.

And then he pointed upstairs, and I didn’t need him to point twice. I almost knocked the last of my drink over as I whipped my wrap off the back of my chair and damn ran to the elevator.

He’s making me wait on purpose—I know this game because he knows the effect he has on me. He’s conditioned me, like fucking Pavlov. A tux, some smiling, a little dancing, and one single finger in his mouth and I’m damn near panting.

Well, if he’s going to take his merry time, I’m not going to wait.

I eased out of my heels and slipped my dress off, tossing it over a chair. I looked at myself in the mirror, pleased with how my stockings and garter look along with my bra—all black and lacy and delicate.

I felt sexy.

And definitely bold enough to just sliiiiide my fingers beneath the waist band of my panties and touch—

“Hold it, darlin’,” Merriell’s voice sounded from somewhere near the door and I froze.

I’m still standing in front of the mirror, watching myself, but as Mer stepped closer and came into view, my hand continued its trajectory.

I smirked as I watched his mouth open, whether from arousal or from disbelief, I wasn’t sure, but I ignored him anyway.

I brushed against my clit and bit my lip as I watched his mirror eyes shift from my face to the juncture between my thighs.

I didn’t want to close my eyes because I wanted to see if what I was doing to him was even just a fraction of what he had done to me all night, but I needed to close them for effect. As soon as I shut my eyes, I breathed in a soft, sexy voice, “Snaaafuuu,” purposefully elongating the vowels to draw out the moment.

I gasped as Mer’s hands grabbed my hips, pulling me against his body and holding me firmly in place. His movement was so fast and so rough that my hand jostled right out of my panties.

“Wha’ didja call me?” he breathed into my ear.

“Snafu,” I said, arching my brow and meeting his eyes in the mirror.

One hand was still on my hip, but the other had snaked up to grasp my jaw.

I continued, “That’s who you are when you’re with them. That’s what they all call you.”

“Don’ use words ya don’ undastand, baby girl.”

“I know what it means,” you shot back, watching as Mer’s eyes darkened in the mirror. “I asked around.”

Merriell still hadn’t moved, still hadn’t released me and the throbbing between my legs was now a maddening crescendo with every press of his fingers into my skin and with every whispered word that vibrated through his chest.

“Is dat what ya want? Ya want Snafu to fuck you like the hot little slut ya are?”

“Yes,” I said, firm and clear.

“Hands and knees. On the bed, right on the edge—no, leave those stockin’s on,” he said as I had moved to unclasp my garters.

I positioned myself just as he commanded. I honestly hadn’t thought it were possible to get any more wet, but the sight of him shrugging out of his coat, then unbuttoning his shirt and leaving it on but hanging open, shot another wave of desire right through me. Mer—Snafu, I corrected in my head, kicked off his shoes and toed off his socks before moving behind me.

It was such a loss for me, being unable to see him, but soon his hands were on me, running down my back and over the strap of my bra, running along the edges of my panties, his fingers sliding under the garter straps to tease the skin there. And then, I realized he was slowly folding back the edges of my underwear, revealing more and more of my ass, bunching up the light material until it was firmly between my cheeks.

He reached out with both hands and grasped and squeezed my ass before pulling me back to tease me by grinding our hips together.

I moaned, delighted at the bit of friction, but Snafu pulled back, landing a sharp smack on my right ass cheek.

“Oh!” I cried out and I could feel the heat rising in my face, coloring my cheeks.

“S,” he said. “What’s S?”

It took me a minute to figure out what he was asking, but then I remembered what got me into this position.

“Situation—oh, fuck!” I said as his hand came down, this time on my left cheek.

“N,” he grunted.

“Normal,” I breathed, my ass clenching, waiting for the sting that came to my right cheek again.

“A.”

“All—fuck, yes!” I said through the sting that followed.

“F,” he said, his voice low and thick with a gravelly lust.

“FUCKED!” I screamed as he didn’t hesitate and brought both hands down on both cheeks.

“U.”

“Up,” I whispered, bracing for the next spank, but it didn’t come. Instead, I could feel his hands gently rubbing over the marks I knew were on my ass.

“Good girl,” he whispered before gently kissing each cheek.

My body was so tight, so ready to be unwound that my arms and legs were trembling.

Snafu worked to unhook the garters that held up my stockings and undid the clasp on my belt. I heard the tink of the metal hitting something as he tossed the garter belt away.

He pushed my nylons down until they met the bed, running his fingers up and down my thighs, making me shiver from the contrast of his earlier smacks.

I wanted desperately to relieve the pressure on my arms and at least get on my elbows, but I wasn’t about to move until I received another instruction. Snafu was different, quieter, unpredictable and I didn’t want to do anything to end this particular game early.

After reaching up to unclasp my bra, Snafu was ready to give me another order.

“On ya back,” he said.

I shifted my position, shucking my bra off as I moved. Snafu reached down to finish removing my nylons and all that was left were my panties.

Snafu made quite a slow show taking the rest of his clothes off, which was exactly on par with how all of the teasing this evening had gone.

I watched his muscles move as he pulled each arm out of the tight sleeves of the dress shirt, and then I watched as his forearms flexed as he unbuckled the trousers.

Of course that slut wasn’t wearing underwear and he looked at me, eyes hooded with lust and his lips forming an open-mouthed smirk.

“Tell me ya need me,” Snafu said as he stood naked in front of me.

“I need you, Snafu. Desperately,” I moaned as I dipped my hand beneath my waistband again.

“Show me,” he said.

I wiggled out of my panties, tossing them away with my foot. I reached back between my legs, my thighs pushed together for much needed friction when Snafu interrupted by firmly pushing my thighs apart.

“Show me,” he said, a dangerous edge in his voice.

I bit my lower lip and kept my legs spread. I felt incredibly exposed, which did nothing to stop the flow of my arousal. Even I was shocked to find my fingers immediately coated with slickness. I found I really did want to show him what he did to me, how much I needed him.

I spread my outer lips with two of my fingers while I reached right into my center with another, spreading as much moisture as I could gather. The look in Snafu’s eyes told me I was showing him exactly what he wanted to see. It was hard to see much more than his face from this angle, but I imaged that his cock was rock hard.

I moved my slick fingers to my clit and began to slowly rub, alternating between little circles and longer rubs. As Snafu watched, I could see his arm tense and start moving as he worked his cock.

He watched me like a hawk, and I knew, I fucking knew he was going to stop me before I could orgasm, so I tried to hide my body’s reaction, tried to tamper down my breathing and my moans so he wouldn’t know I was so close, so fucking close—

“No,” Snafu said with that same tone.

I growled in frustration and Snafu laughed, a sharp, breathy little laugh.

“Tell me ya need me,” Snafu repeated.

“Please, please, Snafu. I need you so much.”

“You’ve been such a good girl,” he said as he moved between my legs.

“Yes,” I whispered, as Snafu rubbed the length of his cock between my folds, rocking his cock over my center instead of entering me.

He watched my face as he teased me, his mouth in that damn open grin, and then—

“Jesusfuckingchrist,” I gasped as he thrust into me, and I know I missed the smirk of a lifetime, but my eyes were firmly rolled back in my head as I nearly came on the spot from how good it felt to have him inside of me.

I couldn’t concentrate on the sensation long, though, because Snafu wasn’t playing around anymore. He pushed one of my legs up to my chest while hooking the other over his hips. He angled himself so he could thrust quickly and deeply at a steady pace.

“Is this what ya want? This what ya been wantin’ all night?”

“Yes, Snaf, yes!”

“Ya like mah cock, fillin’ ya up?”

“Yes! I fucking love it!”

He grunted and pulled out of me so quickly that I was genuinely confused, but when he thrust my other leg up to my chest and closed his lips over my clit, I screamed.

Snafu was definitely out to get a noise complaint.

He licked and sucked and used his fingers to touch everything that was sensitive. I’m not exaggerating when I say I saw stars when I came, my orgasm tearing through me like I’d been building up for this release for a damn decade. My body trembled and I clutched at the headboard so hard I thought maybe the wood would crack.

And then, Snafu flipped me over so I was flat on my stomach. He entered me so easily it was shameful, sliding in and setting a fierce pace when he pulled my hips up to meet his.

I knew he was close because his accent was so thick I could hardly understand him, only occasionally make out the dirty things that were falling from his lips.

He pulled out and I hissed at the loss of contact and I wished I could see him stroking himself, coming as he gave my ass a final smack, his fingers digging into the flesh as his hot come splashed all over my ass cheeks and my back.

With groans of pleasure, we both collapsed, my hips falling back down to the bed, my legs stretching and my hands still wrapped around the slats of the headboard.

Snafu, or should I say Merriell now, flopped onto his back beside me just as the phone on the bedside table rang.

Mer lazily reached over and breathed into the receiver.

“Ya?”

He listened, only grunting a short response of “Uh-huh, sho’,” before hanging up and pulling the cord from the wall.

“Keep it down?” I said smiling over at him.

He looked at me and fixed me with a blinding grin as he said, “Guess we betta’ save Snafu fo’ home.”

I laughed as I shook my head and buried my face in the pillow. I felt the bed rise as he slid out, padding to the bathroom.

He returned shortly with a damp towel and cleaned the remnants of our incredible sex off my back, freeing me to slide myself between the sheets. I held it open for Mer as he climbed back into bed, and I snuggled into his arms, our bodies twining into a familiar pattern beneath the cool white cotton.

Merriell “Snafu” Shelton. How does a girl get so lucky? I thought as I drifted off to sleep, smiling against the warmth of his chest.

#snafu #snafu x reader #snafu drabble

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weekendwarriorblog · 3 years

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The Weekend Warrior 8/13/21 - CODA, FREE GUY, DON’T BREATHE 2, RESPECT, THE LOST LEONARDO, WHAT IF, and More!

Well, that was kind of a disappointing last weekend as James Gunn’s The Suicide Squad pretty much tanked at the box office, making less than Birds of Prey did back in February 2020 with all sorts of backseat analysis explaining why it didn’t do well as anyone, other than a scant, few thought. I mean, I’m still kind of stunned, even though COVID and the Delta variant seem to be losing steam as far as being news. It certainly didn’t help that HBO Max decided to release the movie concurrently on HBO Max on Thursday at 7pm.

The nice thing about this week is that we have three new movies, none of which are on streaming or On Demand at the exact same time, so if you want to see any of them, you’ll have to put on your N96 masks and get yourself to theaters. Two of the three movies are originals, while the third is a sequel to quite an original horror movie from about five years back. All of them are pretty good, actually. We’ll get to them soon...

But first, let’s start with this week’s “The Chosen One” and it’s gotta be Siân Heder’s CODA i.e. “Child of Deaf Adults,” which will play in select theaters and on Apple TV+ starting Friday. If you hadn’t heard, it was the belle of the ball at this year’s Sundance Film Festival, winning the Jury Prize and Audience Award alike. Heder previously directed Tallulah and is the showrunner on Apple’s Little America, but this really is a very special film that I’ve enjoyed on repeat viewings now.

It stars Emilia Jones as Ruby Rossi, the sole hearing person in her family of Gloucester fishermen, who are out every day on the sea making the latest catch in their nets. Ruby has other aspirations, and when she joins the school choir, the teacher, Mr. Villalobos (Eugene Derbez) sees talent in Ruby that he thinks might get her into the Berklee College of Music. Ruby has to weigh that with her family’s need to have her as an interpreter while dealing with the other fishermen of the town.

I didn’t know what to expect when I saw this at Sundance back in January, and it still surprised me when I rewatched it again, because it’s a movie that involves a lot of elements that shouldn’t necessarily work, between the fishing and the singing and all the ASL between the amazing ingenue, Ms. Jones, and the deaf actors playing her family, including the one and only Oscar-winning Marlee Matlin. If not for these disparate elements, Coda might be a fairly standard indie family drama, but Heder finds just the right balance of showing how these disparities in Ruby’s life make it hard for her to pursue her dreams.

Ferdia Walsh-Peelo from Sing Street plays the classmate who Ruby is set up with to perform a duet at their high school recital, and of course, he also becomes an unwitting love interest. Unfortunately that’s the aspect of the film that’s the weakest, because Jones’ scenes with Matlin and the other actors, including Derbez, as well as Troy Kotsur and Daniel Durant, as Ruby’s father and brother, are just so powerful and moving even if they’re all in ASL with no dialogue or even incidental score.

Coda is Heder’s second film after Talllulah, a movie starring Elliot Page that never really connected with me, but Coda is such a strong and exceedingly crowd-pleasing film that I have to imagine that this would connect with everybody. I’m not sure if Apple’s gonna be able to get this movie all the way to Oscar night, but I do like its chances for Adapted (?) Screenplay, and maybe Matlin and Kotsur Supporting? I don’t know, because it’s so early and hard to tell, but hopefully the decision to wait so long after the virtual Sundance won’t hurt this movie as it hurt other Sundance award-winning films. Coda is just a joy that I’m sure will be many people’s favorite movie.

You can read my interview with Ms. Heder over at Below the Line.

Incidentally, in last week’s column, I talked about the 20th New York Asian Film Festival, but I didn’t realize that it was only running at Film at Lincoln Center for a week before going down to the SVA Theater on 23rd Street, and you can check out the schedule of movies playing there at the official site. And of course, there’s still the Virtual Festival that’s running through August 22. Also, Fantasia is still going on in Montreal, and I still haven’t had time to watch very much. What can I say? I suck.

Let’s get to some wide releases, shall we?

First up and probably the most likely to win the weekend is Ryan Reynolds’ new action-comedy, FREE GUY (20th Century Studios), directed by Shawn Levy and co-starring Jodie Comer from Killing Eve. The high-concept comedy has Reynolds playing Guy, a bank teller, who actually is a non-player character in a video game called “Free City” that’s kind of a cross between Grand Theft Auto and Fortnite. When he meets Comer’s character in the game, he falls mady in love and decides to do whatever it takes to get on her level. (Get it?) In doing so, Guy ends up becoming a hero for Free City, as well as a viral sensation across the globe as gamers thrill to Guy’s adventures.

Free Guy is Ryan Reynolds’ first live-action starring role theatrical release since…. Oh…. the action-comedy sequel The Hitman’s Bodyguard’s Wife a little under two months ago. Considering that barely made half of what its predecessor did, and that’s with Reynolds sharing the screen with Samuel L. Jackson and Salma Hayek, one wonders if his draw as an A-lister can be maintained during a pandemic. Before that, you’d have to go all the way back to 2018’s Deadpool 2 for a fully live Reynolds movie, because he wasn’t seen as himself for most of his role in and as Detective Pikachu. Of course, Reynolds’ unmistakable voice was back in DreamWorks Animation’s The Croods: A New Age, the sequel to the 2013 blockbuster that made the ballsy move to be one of the first movies to open during the pandemic. It grossed $58.6 million in theaters, which was slightly more than Christopher Nolan’s Tenet and even more than the Warner Bros. sequel, Wonder Woman 1984.

This is also a big movie for Jodie Comer, who won an Emmy and was nominated for two Golden Globes for Killing Eve, but hasn’t really been in too many movies, other than playing Rey’s Mum in Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker. Later this year, she’ll star in Ridley Scott’s The Last Duel and may possibly be back in the awards game again, we’ll see. The movie also stars Lil Rel Howery, who seems to be everywhere and in everything these days, as well as Taika Waititi who is super-hot right now due to 2019’s Jojo Rabbit, and his various television projects, as well as having a small role in James Gunn’s The Suicide Squad last week.

In some ways, Free Guy is gonna be a test for a lot of things, the first one being whether Reynolds is a big enough draw when not playing Deadpool to get people into theaters, just as people are starting to get skittish again about going into movie theaters. More importantly, it will show whether not having a movie on streaming or VOD means that people who want to see it will put aside their fears and return to theaters… like they did with F9 and Black Widow and Godzilla vs. Kong. Is an original non-franchise movie like Free Guy enough to get people interested in getting their butts off the couch and into a far more comfortable movie theater seat? (I’m being facetious, if you didn’t guess.)

After The Suicide Squad last week, I’m really not sure whether I can trust my own instincts, but I also don’t want to lower my prediction to something ridiculous out of fear that the pandemic really is destroying any chance of the box office fully recovering. One thing working in Free Guy’s favor, besides its PG-13 rating is that it’s not available on streaming and VOD. Anyone who has been intrigued by the film’s great reviews will HAVE to go out to a movie theater to see it or else, they’ll have to wait 45 days.

Maybe if this opened last month, I could see it open in the $30 million to $40 million range, but with things being the way they are, I’d probably go with high $20 million, so close to $30 million but not quite.

You can read my review over at Below the Line, and I’ll have an interview with the film’s Production Designer, Ethan Tobman, fairly soon.

Also opening Friday is the horror sequel DON’T BREATHE 2 (Sony/Screen Gems), starring Stephen Lang as the blind former Navy Seal who terrorized a bunch of kids who broke into his house in 2016’s Don’t Breathe.

The original movie, which starred Jane Levy, reuniting with director Fede Alvarez after the two remade Evil Dead for producer Sam Raimi, opened in late August, on the fourth weekend of the original Suicide Squad, in fact, and it knocked the movie out of the #1 spot. Its $26 million opening in 3,000 theaters was impressive for the time, partially because late August has never been great. It stayed #1 for a second weekend, over Labor Day, and it ended up grossing $89.2 million in North America, which is great for an R-rated horror film.

Levy isn’t around for the sequel and Alvarez has moved into a co-writer/producer role for his creative partner, Rodo Sagayes, to take over the directing reins, but honestly, I’m not sure how many people will know or care, because Lang’s character and the film’s violence and chills are it’s real selling point. Like many horror movies, there isn’t much in terms of star power other than Lang, but that has never really hindered the success of a horror movie in the past.

As with every movie I cover in this column, there’s the pandemic in the room and whether that might hold people back from going to theaters. I wish there was a way to calculate the effect that’s had on moviegoing, because it seems to affect movies differently. For instance, the recent The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It was able to open with $24.1 million just two months ago, although that was down from the $40 million of the previous two chapters. So that’s about a 40% drop-off in a similar five-year gap between movies. (Actually, it’s kind of strange that 2021 is replicating 2021 with three sequels to movies from five years earlier.) There’s no denying that the number of Covid cases are way up since June and movie theaters are still being painted as the “enemy” even though no significant cases have been traced back to the movies.

We also have to look at Sony’s last horror sequel, Escape Room: Tournament of Champions, which I quite enjoyed, but it ended up opening with about $10 million less than the original movie a few years back. We can probably expect Don’t Breathe 2 to have a similar pandemic drop-off even if it’s another movie that won’t be on streaming or VOD this weekend.

I think Don’t Breathe 2 should be good for around $15 million this weekend since it’s catering towards a young audience that’s a bit more devil-may-care about going out to theaters. It will also probably appeal more to older single guys than something like Free Guy, which seems different enough to pull in a different audience.

My review will be posted over at Below the Line later on Thursday, plus I have a bunch of interviews coming, including this one with Rodo Sayagues and Fede Alvarez.

Next up is RESPECT (MGM), the long-awaited Aretha Franklin biopic (for those that didn’t see Genius, like me, I guess), starring Oscar-winner Jennifer Hudson as the Queen of Soul. The movie directed by Liesl Tommmy was supposed to be released in January to take part in last year’s Oscars race, but I guess MGM wanted to make sure it got a proper theatrical release, which wasn’t possible since NYC and L.A. movie theaters didn’t reopen until March after the cut-off. But MGM had already decided to push the movie back to the summer in hopes of having more theaters able to play the movie, which is kind of true now?

It’s been a while since we’ve seen JHud in a high-profile theatrical release, and unfortunately, the last one was 2019’s Cats, a movie in which she probably was the best thing, although it still only grossed $27 million domestically, a flat-out bomb. Before that, she provided her voice for the animated blockbuster Sing in 2016, and then a bunch of smaller movies before that. She’s joined in the movie by the likes of Oscar winner Forest Whitaker, Marlon Wayans, Titus Burgess, Mary J. Blige, Marc Maron, and Audra MacDonald, quite an impressive array of talent that shows how many wanted to be involved with this project. Director Liesl Tommy is making her feature directorial debut after directing a ton of theater and TV shows like The Walking Dead and Jessica Jones.

Even so, it’s obviously that the ongoing popularity of Aretha Franklin, especially since her death in 2018, is going to go a long way into getting people into theaters, which includes a lot of older black women who really haven’t had much to get them out into theaters in recent months. Will this be enough?

Before Respect was delayed from its original January release, many thought that Hudson would receive another Oscar nomination for her performances. Having not seen the movie at the time of this writing, I can’t confirm or deny those chances. If that’s still the case, then releasing the movie towards the end of the summer (similar to The Help, successfully, and The Butler, not so much) is an odd decision rather than just holding the movie for festival season by holding until next month.

Either way, I think the love Aretha’s fans have for the Queen of Soul as well as Hudson’s fans, Respect should be good for between $8 and 10 million this weekend -- hard to pinpoint exactly without knowing how many theaters MGM is getting for it against the stronger summer movies.

Mini-Review: I wasn’t really sure what to expect from Respect, even after seeing the trailer a couple dozen times in front of other movies, but it’s a respectable biopic that cover 20 years in the life of the Queen of Soul from singing at a young age in her father’s church to returning to church for the gospel records as captured in the recently-released doc, Amazing Grace.

But first, we go back to 1952 where Aretha is a young girl (played by Skye Dakota Turner) is uncertain of her future as she’s being ordered about by her preacher father (Forrest Whitaker) and trying to find direction. The movie casually sets up the fact that young Aretha was sexually abused by a family friend, and maybe she got pregnant, too? It’s hard to tell and maybe a little odd since she would only have been 10 at the time, but it’s something that will be brought up (just as subtly) over the course of the film.

Jennifer Hudson takes over as Aretha as she turns 19 and goes to New York City to start recording, meets Marlon Wayans’ Ted White, makes him her manager and marries her, which basically has her going from one abusive man in her father to another one. It feels like the movie spends a long than normal time on the ‘60s, which is when Franklin’s career really took off with “Respect” and then a series of hits that took her all around the world. That whole time, she’s dealing with Ted’s abuses and jealousy while trying to write and record those hits, before her dark demons return and she starts drinking heavily.

As you might imagine, you go to see Respect to see how well Jennifer Hudson pulls off the Queen of Soul, and she’s an incredibly complex character that needs a nuanced performance, which Hudson tries to pull off by bringing different aspects of her life into different scenes.

There are some scenes that don’t work as well as others, and it feels like there’s a bit of time-crunching or futzing around so that at a certain point, her father seems to be de-aging, although I was just as impressed (possibly even moreso) with Forrest Whitaker, whose performance as Aretha’s father is more than just a full-on villain despite his violent treatment of his daughter. Wayans is also good and almost unrecognizable at first, and there are a few other nice performances in there as well, including Marc Maron as record label head Jerry Wexler.

But the performances Hudson gives as Franklin are goosebump-inducing, leading up to the recording of her record-selling gospel record as depicted in the aforementioned doc.

A fairly decent representation of Franklin’s little-known life leading up to her fame, Respect probably succeeds the most when Jennifer Hudson is performing as the Queen of Soul, but she’s also created a fairly moving portrait with strong dramatic moments that far outweigh any of the film’s issues. Rating: 8/10

With that in mind, this is how I see the weekend looking with two of the new movies bumping Suicide Squad down to third place where it will be facing off against Respect.

1. Free Guy (20th Century/Disney) - $28.5 million N/A

2. Don’t Breathe 2 (Sony/Screen Gems) - $15 million N/A

3. The Suicide Squad (Warner Bros.) - $10 million -62%

4. Respect (MGM) - $9.6 million N/A

5. Jungle Cruise (Walt Disney Pictures) - $8.7 million -55%

6. Old (Universal) - $2.5 million -36%

7. Black Widow (Marvel/Disney) - $2.4 million -39%

8. Stillwater (Focus) - $2 million -39%

9. Space Jam: A New Legacy (Warner Bros.) - $1.3 million -43%

10. The Green Knight (A24) - $1.1 million -56%

Donnie Yen stars in Bennie Chang’s RAGING FIRE (WELL GO USA), which premiered at the New York Asian Film Festival on Monday and at Fantasia in Montreal on Tuesday, and I’m not going to review this, because honestly, it’s such a cookie-cutter Hong Kong police action-thriller that I’m not sure I really have much to say about it, so I won’t.

On the other hand, I do have more to say about Andreas Koefoed’s documentary, THE LOST LEONARDO (Sony Pictures Classics), the Leonardo being Da Vinci, the master artist behind the Mona Lisa and many other works. Since I don’t really follow the world of art, I really didn’t know about the Salvator Mundi painting found about 10-12 years ago that was thought to be an original Da Vinci worth in the hundreds of millions, often dubbed “The Male Mona Lisa.” But it’s also a painting that was surrounded by controversy due to the 5-year restoring job that may have left very little of the original painting.

As the film began, I was groaning a little about sitting through another movie of art experts and historians talking about how important a find this is and why it’s either great or horrible, depending on who is being interviewed. Eventually, the film gets more interesting as it starts getting into the idea of selling it. After being sold to a wealthy Russian oligarch by an unscrupulous Swiss art dealer who made a nice profit on it, the painting ends up being auctioned by Christie’s, and the story just keeps getting more and more interesting as it goes along.

While I’m not one to go ga-ga over any painting by Da Vinci or otherwise, I do like a good mystery or suspense-thriller, so good on Koefoed for realizing about halfway through this movie that the talking heads will never be as interesting as actual footage. And that’s what happens here, too. I actually feel a little ignorant that I wasn’t aware this was going on as it was, maybe because I don’t really follow the art world in that respect. Maybe I just missed it, so it’s good that Sony Classics (who loves making movies about art) is giving this a fairly high-profile release following its premiere at the Tribeca Film Festival a few months back. In that sense, The Lost Leonardo is quite a gem.

Heinz Brinkman’s USEDOM: A CLEAR VIEW OF THE SEA (Big World Pictures) is a somewhat intriguing doc about the Baltic island of Usedom, the location of a number of imperial German health resorts, beaches and such, and how the Jews were kicked out by the Nazis before Usedom was split into a German and Polish half after WWII. I wish I could get into this more, but I just have a limited mental capacity for a lot of German talking heads.

Which brings us to Michael Tucker and Petra Epperlein’s THE MEANING OF HITLER (IFC Films), the new doc from the team behind Gunner Palace, which looks at the cultural fascination with Hitler and Nazism and the recent rise in white supremacy, antisemitism and the “weaponization of history itself.” I don’t know what that last part means, because I got so swamped this week that I didn’t get to watch this, and like another recent doc on the subject of Naziism and the Holocaust, I just couldn’t get into the right head space to hit play on this doc. Maybe I’ll watch it sometime down the road.

Similarly, I didn’t get around to watching Dutch filmmaker Jim Taihuttu’s THE EAST (Magnet Releasing), which I may like as a fan of Paul Verhoeven’s Dutch WWII films, and I probably should give this a look, but I just ran out of time this week. It’s about a young Dutch soldier who joins an elite unit led by a mysterious captain called “The Turk,” and it takes place in the Indonesian War of Independence after World War II.

As far as TV goes, Wednesday sees the debut of Marvel Studios’ WHAT IF...? on Disney+. I’ve seen the first three episodes, and I was a pretty big fan of the comics in the ‘70s (sadly, part of the giant collection that I sold a few years back), and I guess this is okay. The first episode is the one with Haley Atwell voicing “Captain Carter” i.e. Peggy Carter gets the Super Soldier Serum, which is one of the more obvious What Ifs that could possibly done, so that we can get another “women are as good as men, and they need to be heard” storyline that’s in 90% of the Marvel movies already. On the other hand, the first episode does include the voices of Sebastian Stan and others, so it’s quite a coup in that sense, but whoever wrote it, clearly doesn’t understand that people spoke differently in the ‘40s. I liked the 2nd episode, a mash-up of Black Panther and Guardians of the Galaxy, which is a fun idea that brings together a lot of great characters -- including Chadwick Boseman’s last voice performance -- but again, hearing the voices just isn’t the same when the writing isn’t as good as the movie. I feel like the animation for the show is okay, maybe not quite on par with some of the great Batman or Superman cartoons we’ve gotten over the years. On the other hand, the entire series features the great voice of Jeffrey Wright as The Watcher, acting kind of like the Rod Serling for the series, much like the Watcher does in the comics. I also dug the music by Emmy winner Laura Karpman (Lovecraft Country), and I’ll watch the rest of the series as it debuts, but I’m not sure it’s as much a rush to see each episode to avoid spoilers as with Loki or WandaVision.

Hitting Netflix this week is the limited series, BRAND NEW CHERRY FLAVOR (Netflix), starring Rosa Salazar, Eric Lange, and Catherine Keener. The tagline is: “Lisa Nova (Rosa Salazar) comes to LA dead set on directing her first movie. But when she trusts the wrong person and gets stabbed in the back, everything goes sideways and a dream project turns into a nightmare. This particular nightmare has zombies, hit men, supernatural kittens, and a mysterious tattoo artist who likes to put curses on people. And Lisa’s going to have to figure out some secrets from her own past in order to get out alive.”

Also, TITANS Season 3 debuts on HBO Max, but since I haven’t watched seasons 1 or 2 yet, it might be some time before I get to it.

Next week looks like it could be a bit of a dog with four or five new wide releases but nothing that really jumps out, plus I’ll be in Atlantic City all next weekend, so who knows how much I’ll be able to watch or write about?

#The Weekend WArrior #Movies #Reviews #Coda #Free Guy #Respect #Don't Breathe 2 #the Lost Leonardo #Box Office

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ijustcantwaittobeme · 6 years

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My ZR Secret Santa

I wanted to wait to be sure that @runningalchemist wouldn’t mind me sharing their beautiful work since they are on hiatus. So with their permission, I am honored to share what @runningalchemist‘s ZR Secret Santa gift was to me this year. It is so endearing and lovely - if anyone reads this - even though they are on hiatus, please share some love with them too! Not sure when they will see this but thank you again @runningalchemist for creating this and taking the time to give me such a wonderful gift. I hope your hiatus is treating you well and just know that you and this gift are very much appreciated! Thank you so much!

Title: Love and Memories Warning/Spoilers(?): Mentions of S2 and S3 characters but otherwise spoiler free. Characters: Sam Yao, Jody Marsh, Janine De Luca, Amelia Spens, and Runner Five. (Mentioning of other characters as well!) Description: “ “Sam, what are you doing? You never do reports in here.” Uh-oh, she was crossing her arms now! Yep, he wasn’t getting out of this one. Best just tell her, he was never the best at lying anyway. “Alright, but you cannot tell anyone, Jody. This is something special.”

“Sam! Sam!”

Sam jerked his head up hearing his name shouted, which resulted in him hitting his head on the underside of the comm-shack desk. For a split second he was worried that it was Janine calling for him. After the initial shock wore off, and the throbbing on the back of his head, Sam concluded that it most certainly was not Janine. In fact, it sounded a lot more like Jody.

Still, even though it was Jody, she could not know what he was doing. With the grace of a highly trained spy, Sam resumed a sitting position in his chair and leaned back innocently, which is to say he did it with the grace of a duck on land with oversized flippers (he banged his knee at least three times getting into his chair).

His saving grace was the little fact that the door to the comm-shack tended to stick the colder the weather got. It took Jody a few seconds longer than usual to open the door. That didn’t stop her from being suspicious though.

“What’cha doing, Sam” Jody asked with her usual smile.

“Who? Me? Nothing. Just finishing up some reports for Janine.” Yeah, that was the wrong thing to say. Since when does he willingly stay in the comm-shack to finish reports for Janine. Usually he was finishing them up in the mess hall or in the rec center, where in both places he gets overly distracted.

“Sam, what are you doing? You never do reports in here.” Uh-oh, she was crossing her arms now! Yep, he wasn’t getting out of this one. Best just tell her, he was never the best at lying anyway.

“Alright, but you cannot tell anyone, Jody. This is something special.” She took him at his word. She had her serious face on, her this is an archery challenge and I am going to win face.

Sam went back under the desk. It was dangerous, but hiding the box behind all the wires was the best way he could think to keep the box secret.

“I’ve been working on this for a little while. A few others have been helping me with this. Even Janine has been working on this with me.” As if he was holding a baby, Sam handed the box to Jody.

Her breath was taken away when she removed the lid. One by one she removed the contents as Sam explained what each one was. The first couple of items were lists of five things each. Multiple lists were made, and based on the different handwriting styles they were all by different people.

“I went around to some of the people that Runner Five interacts with and asked everyone to write down their five favorite things about them. Even Janine contributed a list!” Sam explained.

As Jody stopped as she came across a certain name. “This…this one is from Sara! How long have you been doing this?”

Sam rubbed the back of his neck as he glanced to the floor, his eyes held a great deal of sorrow for a moment before he answered Jody’s question.

“I…I started it shortly after Abel was destroyed by the rocket-launcher wielding zombies, soon after we started working with New Canton. There’s a list from Archie in there. Even Major De Santa wrote a list for Five.” Sam chuckled, granted it was a nervous one, but a chuckle all the same. “I had thought about asking Nadia to contribute to the list, but I haven’t gotten around to it. Even though they have worked together pretty well since the…uh, the deadlock incident, I have been wondering if I even should ask her.”

“Have you asked our new Major, that Amelia Spens?” Jody asked. Jody didn’t care for Amelia, if her constant attempts at avoiding her was proof of anything.

“No, I don’t want to ask her. She wouldn’t have anything good to say about Five.”

Sam watched as Jody pulled the next several items out of the box. They were some of his favorite photos. Candid shots of Five were always the best. Yes, taking pictures of Runner Five while they were sleeping could definitely be considered creepy. But, come on, Five was just sleeping with three cats curled around them. How could anyone not take a picture of that!

“Sam, where did you get all these pictures?” Jody was astonished. There were pictures of Five playing Demons and Darkness. There were pictures of Five serving food in the mess hall. There were pictures of Five and Simon having bike races around the quad. There were pictures of Five helping out with the little kids. There were pictures of Five dancing. It seemed like Sam had gathered every single picture ever taken of Runner Five since the apocalypse started.

“I asked around to see if anyone had any pictures of Five. I had taken most of those myself, but Maxine and Jack and Eugene contributed most of the rest.”

“Wait a minute! I know this picture!” Sam moved so that he could see what picture Jody was holding in her hand, quite close to her face.

Sam smiled once he saw what picture it was. That was not a day that anyone would soon forget. In the picture, Runner Five was almost jumping up and down in excitement with a large grin plastered on their face. Jody had just made the winning archery shot for Abel Township in a competition against New Canton. Five had been Jody’s assistant for that contest. Several people, Jack and Eugene included, had wanted Jody and Five to race to see who was the fastest. Both runners declined the race in favor of more celebrating.

Seeing a picture of a moment when everything was just going right brought a smile to Sam’s face. He was so caught up in his memories that he missed Jody grabbing the last items in the box. It was only her gasp that brought him back to reality.

“Sam, are these-“ Jody began.

“Yeah, they are. The kids like bringing Five little items they find and collect and they like bringing Five a bunch of their drawings,” Sam said.

“I knew the kids did something like this. I even have a few, but no where near as many as Five’s got.”

“Most of those are from Molly,” Sam explained. “She likes bringing Five a new picture every week. She’s always been proud that she was the first person that Five directly saved since they arrived in Abel.”

“But, how come I never see Five with these drawings?”

“Oh, that’s because Five had asked me to keep them safe. I keep the pictures here until Five asks to see them. A lot of the time that the are in here they are looking at the drawings. I think it’s somewhat therapeutic for them.”

Jody was quiet for quite a while. The entire time she just stood there, staring at a child’s drawing of their hero. In this case, that hero was Runner Five.

“We have to do something for Runner Five, something nice.” Jody’s abrupt announcement startled Sam.

“Yes! We should, but what should we do?”

“Hmm, let me think.”

Sam could have sworn he heard the lightbulb turn on above Jody. Her impish smile that accompanied said lightbulb confirmed Sam’s suspicions. This was gonna be fun!

“I know exactly what we need to do!”

Five was nervous. Janine had summoned them to her farmhouse. While that in itself is not strange or scary, this time was different. This time there was a look in Janine’s eye. It was common knowledge that Janine was always hiding something, more than one something actually. That was just her way, and it very rarely worried Five. Today, though, it felt like Janine was desperately trying to hide something from Five. If Runner Five didn’t know better, it almost seemed like Janine was planning a surprise party or something.

As they made their way to the farmhouse, they kept rubbing their knuckles together. It was a simple nervous habit. Maxine had jokingly told Five before that they were going to rub off the skin on their knuckles if they kept doing that.

Before Runner Five opened the kitchen door to Janine’s farmhouse, they could hear voices inside. One was Amelia’s and the other was Jody’s. The door was too thick to let actual words through, but the tones could be determined. Amelia was being her snarky self and Jody was having none of it.

Sure enough, when Five opened the door there Amelia was looking down with a smirk on her face at Jody, who was nearly on her tippy-toes trying to get in Amelia’s face. That’s the downfall of being a head shorter than someone. It makes it very difficult to intimidate someone when you’re looking up at them.

“Ms. Spens.” Ah, Janine was talking now. “I approved Ms. March’s idea.”

“Oh, you approved it. Did you think of checking with me to see if I approved it?” It was hard to tell if Amelia was actually upset or not.

“No, I didn’t.” Janine, blunt as always.

“Come on, Amelia. We need this, we all need this. Going around and getting this put together has made a lot of people happy,” Sam said.

“And it’s not like it’s hurting you. You didn’t have to do anything for it, so that should make you happy.” Jody hadn’t moved from her position in front of Amelia. Five had to admit it was kinda adorable.

“Fine, fine, do whatever you want with this. But don’t expect me to approve of any parties or anything else. This is it.”

Amelia turned from the rest to leave the farmhouse when she spotted Five standing just inside the doorway eavesdropping, or whatever it is you call it when someone walks into a conversation and just listens without anyone else knowing.

“Runner Five, as soon as you are done here come find me. I have a run I need you to do for me. Don’t take longer than ten minutes, it is time sensitive.” And without another word, Amelia walked past Five and out the farmhouse.

“Five!” Jody shouted as she raced to Five and began dragging them further into the house. Her grin must have been infectious, because Sam had an equally large one on his face and even Janine had a small smile on hers. Whatever was going on it had to be big and it had to be good!

On Janine’s kitchen table was an object about ten inches wide, fifteen inches long, and at least three or four inches deep covered with a cloth. Sam, Jody, and Janine were staring at Five with expectation and giddiness, at least on Sam’s and Jody’s parts (they both looked like they were about to jump out of their skin with excitement). Gingerly, Five grasped the cloth and pulled it away. Underneath was a large leather-bound book. Sliding it towards themselves, Five opened the book to the first page.

Runner Five,

This is a scrapbook of sorts for you. Pretty much everyone in Abel, and a few New Canton residents, contributed to this scrapbook. We love you Five, we all do. We just wanted to make sure that you know that. So that’s what this scrapbook is for. To show you how much we care and love you.

Jody, Sam, and everyone else.

Just that small letter at the beginning of the scrapbook nearly brought tears to Five’s eyes. Flipping page after page, Five saw pictures and drawings and letters and little notes that a couple of people wanted to put in the margins.

Runner Five wasn’t even halfway through the book before the tears started falling. Some of them were happy tears, other were bittersweet tears (memories of those no longer here), and some of the tears were just from being so overwhelmed.

Jody had wrapped her arms around Five in a hug when she noticed the tears. Sam joined in the hug a few seconds later. While Janine didn’t hug Five, she did place her hand on Five’s arm in a comforting gesture (from her it was as good as a hug).

“Runner Five, as reluctant as I am to break this up, which I am, Ms. Spens has requested your assistance on a run. I do not approve of this run, she has not run it by me. Never the less, she is the one sent to us and we must follow the chain of command.” It really did sound like Janine was reluctant to send Five out on a run after showing them the scrapbook.

“Go on, Five. Sam and I will make sure that this gets someplace safe,” Jody said.

“Good luck out there, Five,” Sam said. “I’ll be monitoring the comm channels in case Amelia tries to pull anything. Don’t worry, Five, I’ve got your back. We all do.”

#zr secret santa #@runningalchemist's gift to @ijustcantwaittobeme - aka me!!!#<3 #zr #including the closeness between Five and Jody as well as Five and Sam meant the world to me #this is all I asked for and so much more!!#thank you again!!!!#zr secret santa gifts make my heart so happy!!#my heart is a marshmallow - everything about this is uplifting and thoughtful and I treasure it #i'm also posting this on january 5th - my birthday - because rereading it makes me happy

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liliannorman · 4 years

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Curiosity drives this neuroscientist and artist

When she was young, Christine Liu didn’t plan to become a scientist. But chasing her curiosity led her to love neuroscience, the study of the brain and the nervous system. She’s now a graduate student and researcher at the University of California, Berkeley. There, she studies what nicotine, the addictive chemical in tobacco and e-cigarettes, does to the brain.

Christine Liu sells some of her art at a zine festival.Tera Johnson

Outside the lab, Liu makes art, including some that communicates science. As half of the collective Two Photon Art, with environmental scientist Tera Johnson, Liu makes self-published magazines that illustrate science concepts. And the pair designs and sells science-themed items such as jewelry and clothes. Liu also shares her work on Instagram (such as the posts embedded in this story).

Liu isn’t yet sure if her future is in the lab or making art, but she knows that neuroscience will be a big part of her career. In this interview, Liu shares her experiences and advice with Science News for Students. (This interview has been edited for content and readability.)

What inspired you to pursue your career?

I pursued neuroscience because of a curiosity about how the world works. Even as a little kid, I was interested in how people experience things differently. So I would ask questions like, “Is the red that I see the same as the red that everyone else sees?” When I started learning about psychology and biology and answers to these questions that researchers proposed, I got more interested. In college, I jumped at the opportunity to get in the lab as soon as I could. And I quite like doing lab work. But I’ve been doing research for almost 10 years. So I might take the opportunity when I graduate to do art more seriously.

How did you get where you are today?

I grew up not really being that great at anything. It wasn’t like I knew I had a special talent in science and that I was going to become a scientist. I also grew up low-income. My family didn’t have a lot of money. As a kid, I spent a lot of time helping out around the house. I translated documents for my family and made sure that the rice was cooked before my parents got home. And I started working part-time jobs really early. In high school, I worked at a Jamba Juice and at a science museum. I did a bunch of jobs in college, too.

My college applications weren’t very strong. So I didn’t get into the colleges in California I actually wanted to go to. Instead, I needed to apply last minute to the local state school. I went to University of Oregon in Eugene. It wasn’t on the top of my list, but there were a lot of opportunities in neuroscience there. I was really able to take advantage of them. I overcame a lot of what I thought were shortcomings in my ability and competitiveness to do science.

When I started doing research, I was lucky to be in a lab with other female students. And I had done summer research programs with a diverse community of students and researchers. But when I started grad school, I was a little surprised at how few women and people of color I saw.

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everything matters

. Or is it that every thing is matter? Here are some molecule constellations! Molecules and constellations are very different in size but they have a lot in common too! The lines dont depict anything with mass, but rather a connection between two points. In the case of a molecule, it is a bond caused by very strong, but tiny forces. In constellations, the lines mean little more than a game of "connect the dots" with what we can see with our eyes from earth. Another thing that they have in common is that they are both quite pretty and fun to draw

A post shared by christine ramen liu (@christineliuart) on Jan 29, 2020 at 10:01am PST

I also wasn’t sure how to express myself — if I needed to conform more or if I could really be myself. But then on Instagram, I found all these women who were not compromising how they express themselves. They were doing incredible science. And they were wearing lipstick and doing their hair and being feminine. This was something that I hadn’t realized was missing in my life. I immediately tried to connect all of us on Instagram, and I created a group called The STEM Squad. (STEM is short for science, technology, engineering and math.) We now have over 1,000 people who identify with the gender that’s been underrepresented in science. We each share our experiences and support each other.

How do you get your best ideas?

I get my best ideas when I’m taking a break. This happens for a lot of people. It’s like getting your best ideas in the shower or on a walk or right before you fall asleep. I find that when I’m taking care of myself and getting enough rest and social time, I come up with ideas I’m really excited about. Oftentimes, I’ll have a breakthrough in planning experiments when I’m not thinking about them. It’s the same for artistic ideas of what to draw or make. I think when I let my brain rest, it does its own thing in the background and ideas just spark.

What’s one of your biggest successes?

What I’ve been able to do with my art in grad school has been one of my biggest successes. It’s brought me a lot of joy and connected me with people. It’s also given me an idea of how I might actually be able to continue doing art after I finish grad school.

Labs in my research area can be competitive. Oftentimes, we don’t want to share our experimental results until we’re ready. So it wasn’t until this past year, my sixth year of grad school, that I presented my research at the biggest neuroscience conference. I presented it with a poster. But I’ve been going to this conference for the past four years because they have a section for neuroscience art. Presenting my art there was a big success.

What’s one of your biggest failures, and how did you get past that?

What I perceived to be a failure was when I worked hard in high school to try to be competitive for college. And I didn’t get into a school that seemed like a good choice for me. I was really sad. I thought I was a complete failure. A lot of my peers had gotten into great schools. But in the end, I realized that every failure is actually an opportunity to do better. I think if I had let myself get sucked into the narrative that I just wasn’t good enough, I never would have recovered. In the end, the University of Oregon turned out to be really great for me.

What do you do in your spare time?

I make art! Because research is really hard, there can be lots of failures. Experiments might not work. Or they might work and prove your hypothesis wrong. During a stretch of months when research feels like it isn’t working, I find it fulfilling to go home and draw, paint or share a piece of art. I really love painting. It’s one of my favorite activities. I love the colors and mixing them. And I like how it’s a little bit messy. I also do other things that keep me happy and healthy, like cooking and visiting my grandparents.

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The sketch I made for the mural I’m working on at @missionscienceworkshop! The Mission Science Workshop is a really cool tinkering and science education space in the Mission and Excelsior neighborhoods in San Francisco. I’m excited to paint two walls adjacent walls to give some context for kids to learn about where different kinds of rocks are formed and whether fossils were found! I made this sketch in @procreate on my iPad and then mapped it onto a photo of the walls. You can check out the progress made during day 1 of painting in my story highlights!

A post shared by christine ramen liu (@christineliuart) on Nov 25, 2019 at 7:16pm PST

I also try to support other scientists who have artistic interests or artists who have scientific interests through The Stem Squad. We raise money through artists in the community who submit their art. We print it on shirts, hats or things like that and sell them. This raises money to give out awards for people who do volunteer work to improve inclusion in STEM.

What piece of advice do you wish you had been given when you were younger?

If there’s something that you really want to do, you have to take baby steps and start to do it as much as you can. If I had waited until someone invited me to join a lab, maybe I never would have started my research career. But because I was so in love with the idea of doing brain research, I emailed a bunch of professors and begged for a chance to work in the lab. Then I proved to myself that I can be a really great scientist despite my mediocre high school grades.

Also, if I had waited until I had more time to make art or until I felt like a perfect artist before selling my art, I don’t think I would be where I am today. It took me a while to become comfortable sharing things that aren’t perfect and trying things even though I probably wasn’t the best person for the job. But taking the risk and putting myself out there and being willing to learn — I think that’s what’s gotten me the furthest.

This Q&A is part of a series exploring the many paths to a career in science, technology, engineering and mathematics (STEM). It has been made possible with generous support from Arconic Foundation.

Curiosity drives this neuroscientist and artist published first on https://triviaqaweb.tumblr.com/

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ladyfawkes · 4 years

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What Rapunzel’s Tangled Adventure Means to Me aka Welcoming Ghosts of my Past

“When Eugene called Rapunzel Sunshine, I felt that...”

Confession: I feel this each and every time Eugene says this. Especially since Sunshine is an actual nickname of mine. My heart skips a beat because….it’s what my fiancé used to call me. And I say “used to” because he passed away before we could get married. It’s high time I explained to everybody the reason why I glommed onto Tangled the Series for dear life…since I’ve been putting it off for the past 4 months. Got less than a week left til the series finale….. and this series came along right when I needed it. When I began getting deeper into Tangled fandom, it wasn’t until around later October 2019. I was feeling a real hankering for more of Eugene Fitzherbert’s singing voice. Confession 2: Until Autumn 2019, I had NO IDEA that Zachary Levi had voiced Flynn Rider, both speaking AND singing!! At the time, the main thing that drew me to Flynn was his singing voice. I never forgot that. Like so many others, I fell in love with Tangled’s soundtrack and specially with “I See the Light” and “I’ve Got a Dream”, etc. Confession 3: I’ve had a crush on Zachary Levi ever since the first episode of Chuck. Even though Chuck’s social and emotional insecurities are a rather enormously huge humorous part of the plot, the way Zach portrayed that anxiety and other types of raw emotions were real. He possesses a markedly rare ability to elicit laughter and tears within the same scene, and sometimes within the very same moment of a scene. While it’s an exceptional gift to exhibit that ability, it nearly always means that underneath it all, the reason why you can perceive this type of emotion so plainly from any given actor is because they’ve experienced those feelings on a personal level in their private lives. Nobody ever told me this, it’s something I learned through observation. It’s true of writers too…and composers. The best way to telegraph emotion through a given medium to someone else is often by having initially having experienced those emotions for yourself. It wouldn’t be until years after Chuck began that Zach would feel comfortable enough to share his mental health history with his fans…and we’d begin to learn just how deep he truly is. With all of this in mind, I was perusing YouTube with the intent of finding more of “Flynn Rider’s singing voice” and imagine my shock & delight when a whole bunch of Tangled the Series and Tangled Before Ever After songs showed up in my search!!! Then I Looked up the fan wikia only to discover that it was none other than our dear Zachary Levi who had voiced Eugene Fitzherbert!!! I got positively thrilled and was already on Cloud Nine before I’d even begun watching it. Despite Disney’s, uh, thorny history with spinoffs, I couldn’t help but be excited as I learned most of the original cast had returned as well!! I queued up Tangled Before Ever After and was instantly transported, instantly fell in love. I truly did not expect to be as drawn to Eugene as I was….in the film version, I wasn’t so sure about him….but I gravitated toward him immediately in the series. At first, I really didn’t know why. The feeling seemed familiar somehow and again….I didn’t know why. I couldn’t figure it out. As I watched the first few episodes, I was constantly live-gushing (that’s akin to live-tweeting, only over Messenger instead) about the show with my friend Samara as I watched; Sammeh is also a Tangled superfan. I was continually talking about how it was the Disney’s best spinoff I had ever seen, how I was shocked that they cast SO MANY original cast members, original songwriters, etc. I can unequivocally state I haven’t loved an animated series this much in my life, even as a child. Then I was describing how much I could not get over the healthy, loving relationship portrayed between Eugene and Rapunzel. As I sat describing it, I suddenly said, “Oh my gosh. Sammeh…..” And it caused me to freeze. Even though Sam had known my former fiancé just as long as we’d known each other, I didn’t know if Sam would think I was nuts for suggesting that certain aspects of Eugene’s personality reminded me of Anthony. After a long pause, I typed as much to her, “I don’t know if I should say this to you…..” yet I needn’t have worried, because Sam completed my thought for me: “You’re gonna say he’s like Anthony.” I was so surprised I said, “YES!!! How did you know I was gonna say that?!” ”Easy. Because I’ve seen it too.” In spite of myself, I wept after she said that. So it wasn’t just imaging it. I’m getting teary-eyed now just thinking about it. The love between Eugene and Rapunzel reminds me of the love I had with my Anthony. Anthony was not intimidated by my inner strength, we took turns rescuing each other, he was willing to listen to me talk for hours and hours and hours and I did the same with him, we took turns forever teasing one another, we couldn’t ever stay angry with each other, we always talked things out. He was forever encouraging my talents and dreams. We hung out with an unlikely, rag-tag group of friends. And especially the way Eugene caresses Rapunzel’s face, kisses her forehead….and spontaneously says the most heart-melting romantic things…..that was just like my Anthony. And of course, he called me “The light in my life….My Sunshine.” Now….while Anthony didn’t die while rescuing me from an enemy, his was a sacrifice of a different kind….for shortly before he passed, he was experiencing far too much mental strife….never once did he self-disclose this, though….and unfortunately, we didn’t learn until after the fact. It became apparent he felt his only way out was to take his own life. Needless to say, I crawled into a very dark place after he died. I tried very hard not to….but over the prior 18 months I’d already lost so very much. I’d lost a job, loss of place to live, for months, I was being literally starved by my abusive-prior-ex-boyfriend ….I just shriveled up inside due to self-doubt, self-hatred, and I couldn’t speak about anything. Even from 1800 miles away at the time, Anthony managed to be the one person to draw it all out of me. (I was estranged from most family at the time – with good reason) and I told him everything….and he listened to all of it, never interrupting, never judging, never being anything but his amazing self. Somehow, after two years of friendship and listening to one another, Anthony had fallen in love with me….even though all of the garbage I told him. To this day, I do not know what he saw in me. But something inside knew that if I could just strive to put good things surrounding that fateful date, its anniversary would lose its sting and I could heal and live the way Anthony would’ve wanted me to live. Although I’d described some of the lowlights, I’ve definitely had moments in my life that have filled me with much love and light. I’ve been so very scared to type all of this out, put it all out there, for fear of being…..judged. Ridiculed. You know how the internet can be……naturally there’s a lot more to this story that I would like to share with you yet this has already become prohibitively lengthy. The whole point is to say that it’s been nearly 14 long years since I last heard Anthony’s light sweet southern drawl. And through the magical medium of Rapunzel’s Tangled Adventure, this show effectively allowed me the heartwarming and bittersweet chance to feel a small part of his love within my life again. I don’t know quite how it happened….but happen it did….right when I needed it. Anthony and I were very flirty and silly and ridiculous as a couple, just the way you would expect two twitter-pated people to be….the way Eugene calls Rapunzel “Sunshine” and caresses her cheek….the way he looks at her ….with his heart is full of so much love that it touches his warm brown eyes….those things remind me most of Anthony. Hopefully you can see why it’s been so difficult to, ah, self-disclose this information about myself. So…..thank you for that from the bottom of my heart, Disney, Chris Sonnenburg, Shane Prigmore, Tara Nicole Whitaker, Tom Caulfield, Stephen Sandoval, Zachary Levi, Mandy Moore, Eden Espinoza, James Iglehart, Jeremy Jordan, Kevin Kleisch, Alan Menken, Glenn Slater, Anna Lencioni, and anybody else whom I’ve missed…..though I’ve only been a superfan for 4 months, I don’t know what I’m gonna do without this singularly unique show in my life!!

#tw #personal stories #rapunzel's tangled adventure #anecdotes #eugene fitzherbert #rapunzel #rta #tangled the series #tts #mental health #suicide #depression

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