#indestructible babies that could and would eat your soul
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bandaids
synopsis. in the midst of finals season, where routine takes over your lifestyle, you find solace in the voice of your most important person that always seem to know when you’re at your breaking point.
pairing. boyfriend! kim doyoung ✗ student! fem! reader
genre. fluff, angst, slice of life, hurt/comfort, college au, non idol au, established relationship au
word count. 1.8k words
warnings. cursing, mentions of anxiety, depictions of a mental breakdown
song. bandaids by keshi
author’s note. after looking at my calendar, it has come to my attention that it’s that time of the year: finals season. i just want to let all of you know that you are doing a great job. you made it this far and i’m proud of you. i promise you, you will get through this. hopefully this could give comfort in the midst of your studies. love you all.
friends of flowers
fragile silence
stand beside you
stop your crying
If there is one thing that all college students could agree on, it’s that finals seasons are the absolute worst thing to ever go through in college. You’re constantly spending every night at the library with your eyes glued onto your textbooks, your brain rushing to keep up in retaining all the pertinent information needed for your exams. You’re devoting hours onto your laptop with your fingers typing away on your keyboard, internet tabs and pages cluttering your screen as you rush to reach the minimum page count required for your courses.
So many times you have declined all your friends’ requests for study dates or a simple get-together because you just don’t have the luxury to. As much as you’d love to take a break from your studies, you feel like you’re running out of time. It has gotten to the point where your boyfriend has to remind you every now and then to take breaks as he gets concerned for your well-being. And just when you thought you were done with one exam or assignment, you look back on your planner only to find out that there’s more to complete. It’s like your pile just doesn’t seem to lessen with each passing day, your mentality on the brink of collapse.
Just where is the end to all of this?
You are currently perched over your desk, packets of case studies splayed out on top of your corrections textbook. Your laptop screen shines bright at the corner, documents filled with infinitesimal texts and numbers. To your right lies your essential oil diffuser, planted right on your nightstand with fumes of aroma wafting through the air. You took your best friend’s suggestion in purchasing an aromatherapy diffuser to help relieve some stress you’ve accumulated from your studies. Lavender should help out, she said. But to your dismay, you don’t feel a single ounce of it lifting from your shoulders. Forcing your brain to believe its effective properties only puts your head more into a strain.
That’s when you felt a sharp pain rip through your skull. ‘Great,’ you groaned to yourself, ‘another fucking headache.’ You dropped your pen on your notebook and rubbed your fatigued eyes, the pressure from your fingertips massaging away. “God, I can’t wait for this semester to be over with already.”
Crossing your arms, you found your phone lying in the middle of your bed. You forgot that you left it on ‘do not disturb’, finally realizing why you didn’t hear your phone ring in the past few hours. You grabbed your phone off your bed. 2:58 am, it reads. Unlocking your phone, you skimmed through your notifications, your fingers swiftly responding to certain messages cluttered up in your phone until you reached to this one particular conversation:
hey babe (sent by doie <3, 11:01pm)
hope you’re eating your meals and drinking water (sent by doie <3, 11:01pm)
just want to let you know that i’m proud of you (sent by doie <3, 11:02pm)
always am and always will (sent by doie <3, 11:02pm)
love you (sent by doie <3, 11:02pm)
You could feel a smile blooming on your lips. It has been a while since you’ve seen Doyoung, let alone hear his voice. Is it too late to call him? ‘He might be sleeping,’ you thought to yourself. ‘Should I?’ Biting your lip, you mustered up the courage and decided to call him. Placing your phone against your ear, you awaited his call. The sound reverberates through your eardrums, the anticipation of having your call picked up diminishing with each passing ring. And just when you were about to give up, the tune stops short on its last ring.
“Hello?” a deep voice croaks.
You softly smile at the sound of his voice. “Hey,” you whispered. “Did I… wake you up?”
“No, no.” You hear him shuffling on his end, to what you could assume to be from his movements in his bed sheets. “Not at all, baby.” You couldn’t help but let out a giggle, touched over the fact he’s easing your guilt of awakening him from his much-needed slumber. “What’s wrong? You need something?”
You shrugged your shoulders, a habit you’ve developed when talking on the phone with someone. “No, not really.” You run your fingers through your hair before rubbing the nape of your neck. “I just missed you, that’s all.”
He lets out a tired chuckle. “I missed you, too.”
You hum a little, “How are your finals?”
He scoffs. “Shit.”
“Not surprised,” you giggled. “You only have one more left, right?”
“Yeah. Chem 4. After that, I’m ready to sleep for a whole week straight.”
“Can I join you in your sleeping session?”
“You most certainly can.”
You both shared a laugh, your mind finally distracted from the strenuous documents that resided on top of your desk. “I call dibs on being the small spoon.”
He chortles. “You’re funny.”
“Hey! It’s only fair.”
“That’s what you said when you ate my share of fries the other week.”
His voice was much livelier than before, fully awakened from his rest now. You missed the jolly feeling you’d get when you talked to him. All those days and nights spent by his side where nothing else mattered in the world except for your boyfriend, whispering loving affirmations to you just like always. You really did miss him, and you can’t wait for this semester to be over to spend quality time with him again.
“Hey, y/n?” he called out.
“Hm?”
“You know that all I ever ask of you is to be honest with me?”
Your smile drops. You know where this is going, and frankly, you’re not sure if you’re ready to have this conversation again. Time after time, he would start a conversation with that question followed by his ongoing concerns wrapped in his mind. Sometimes he would ask for your second opinion, but most of the time they were diverted to you, his forever lover. And you knew this time, this is going to be about you.
Your free hand fiddled with the ends of your finger as you chew on your lip again, your eyes peering down to your lap.
“... yes,” you murmured.
You could hear your heart beating through your ears, the silence deafening the space that encompassed you around. Neither one of you uttered a sound to the other, too afraid to whisper through the thick tension planted in the air. Outside your dorm, there are muffled footsteps fading in and out by your door, most likely from your dorm neighbors coming back from another one of their library sessions. He lets out a soft sigh on his end, not one filled with annoyance, but filled with worry, his attention all focused onto you.
“... are you okay?”
And just like that, you felt the dam inside you crumble to ashes. The mask that you’ve held from the past few weeks is finally dissolving, the facade released from its shackles. Weeks of putting up a front, telling yourself that everything is okay, is now coming to end. ‘I’m fine,’ you would say to yourself. ‘This is nothing, I can handle this myself.’
Oh but darling, there’s only so much you could take in. Not everyone is perfect, and not everyone is indestructible. May we all be human, for we laugh, cry, smile, frown, scream, shout, cheer.
Tears burned through your eyelids, blurring your line of vision as you tried to hold yourself together. You shakily let out a sigh. “.... no,” your voice cracks. Another deep sigh, and you felt a tear drip down your cheek. “I’m… I’m tired, Doyoung.” More tears cascade down your cheeks, bringing your sleeves up to wipe them away with each drop. “I’m exhausted, Doyoung. I’m tired.. of all of this. I’m—”
With the phone still pressed against your ear, you sobbed into the night, finally pouring all your boxed-in emotions out to your lover. You cried out your frustrations, your anger, your desolace. Long have your soul been used to routine that you forgot what warmth felt like. To be cared for, watched for, and loved for.
Your sleeves soaked up all your tears, your eyelids certainly swollen from the sudden rush. You take even breaths, calming yourself down from your breakdown. Throughout your cries, never once did Doyoung strayed away from you, ears firmly pressed against his ear. He took in all, every last drop to mitigate the cold shell you’ve developed over time. He said nothing, only offering his presence as a sort of comfort to you for the time being. Once silence took over, all your tears spent, that’s when he spoke up.
“You did well, y/n.”
You breathing hitches for a moment, heart skipping a beat from his words.
“I’m so, so proud of you, y/n. You made it this far into the semester and for that, I’m proud of you.”
And alas, your smile returns. Minuscule it may be, but it’s more than what you could ask for. The feeling of having your shoulders lifted from your burdens made you feel like you could fly again, soar up in the clouds. Your best friend certainly knows how to cheer you up the most.
“Sorry about all of that,” you chuckled.
“Don’t be sorry.”
You shook your head. “No, I am. You literally just heard me have a breakdown and cry with snots all over the place—”
“I don’t give a damn about all of that, y/n.” There’s a slight shuffle on his end. “I love you for you, and that’s never going to change. I will love you at your lowest, and I will love you at your highest. Even when you feel like there’s no hope left in this world, I will bring you back to earth and hold you and remind you that you are hope.”
Just when you thought you had no more tears left in your system, you could feel the waterworks starting again. You bite down on your lower lip, desperately holding it in as love overcomes you.
“You did well, y/n. Only two more finals to go and you’re finally free.”
You wipe away the stray tear that befallen on your cheek. “Thank you, Doyoung. Really.”
“Now go out there and kick some ass for me, alright? Show those professors who’s the boss around here.”
You giggled. With your two fingers on your temple, you did an informal salute. “Yes, sir.”
“That’s my girl.”
Let this be a reminder to you, to all, that there will always be one person that will love you at your lowest, and will always be there to help pick you back up.
i’m afraid that bandaids
are no good for heartache
not okay, so tell me
when your world is falling down
#doyoung#kim doyoung#doyoung scenarios#doyoung imagines#doyoung fluff#doyoung angst#nct#nct 127#nct scenarios#nct imagines#nct 127 scenarios#nct 127 imagines#doyoung smut#kim dongyoung#doyoung x reader#doyoung x oc
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Ice Cold ~Part 6
A/N: The second part of the night! There’s probably going to be a lot of days/nights where I upload two parts at a time so I can get to the final part by halloween!
I was aware of voices but I couldn't open my eyes. They were hushed voices but I still heard them. I couldn't distinguish at all though who it was. I was vaguely aware that my ears were ringing and that it smelled like William a little bit. As I laid there I was becoming more aware and started shifting. All the voices stopped when I turned over and groaned.
"Where am I?" I mumbled.
"Hi (y/n), would you like some water?"
"No, where am I?"
"You're in my house, it's Morgan by the way."
"Why am I here? Where's William? Is he okay?" I asked panicking, trying to sit up. A cool hand pushed me back to lay down.
"William is perfectly fine, not a scratch on him."
"How is that even possible?"
"I can't tell you that right now."
"You guys really are pulling an Edward Cullen on me."
"Do you want me to get Will? You two should talk before the rest of us."
"Where is William?"
"He's in the other room talking to Auston."
"Oh God..I'm gonna ruin everything again." I said tears slipping out.
"You aren't ruining anything. I'll go get him for you."
"Thank you Morgan." I smiled at him through the tears and he smiled back, rubbing my shoulder before leaving the room. William came in almost immediately.
"Hi baby."
"You better start explaining."
"Can you at least tell me how you're feeling first?" He said sighing.
"I'm fine. Confused as fuck and mad that you weren't here when I woke up."
"I had to talk to Auston. I needed to calm him down. He doesn't want me to tell you any of what I now need to."
"Stop beating around the bush Will. Why am I not dead? Why are you not dead?"
"You already have a pretty good idea of how. You weren't that far off when you brought up Edward Cullen."
"William stop fucking around and just tell me! If you love me like you say you do please just tell me without the half truths."
"Fine. I'm a vampire. Is that better?" He growled making me flinch. His face softened immediately.
"I mean yeah. I'd rather have the truth." I tried to sit up and he pushed me back down. "For God sakes can you let me up so I can look at you? I promise I'm fine."
"I'm sorry, I'm incredibly worried."
"I just want to look at you William. Please?" He let me sit up this time but just sat incredibly still and quietly. "I have some questions."
"I figured you would. I'm really nervous for this. I don't know why, Morgan has seen how this plays out."
"Then don't be nervous."
"What if you hate me?"
"What if that's never gonna happen?"
"What are your questions?"
"Well okay how come your eyes are normal?"
"They aren't. We all have contact lenses, I have red eyes when I'm thirsty but blue when I'm fed so to keep it consistent we wear them."
"Can I see what they look like without them?"
"Of course. I despise wearing these things anyways. It'll be nice to not have to wear them with you anymore." He took them out and blinked at me with red tinted eyes. "I don't know what they look like right now, I hope not too frightening."
"They're red around the edges that's all. They're kinda cool."
"Kinda cool? Never had that reaction before." He said with a laugh.
"Alright so are you indestructible? It seems like yes."
"Pretty much. Twilight got that part right. Rip apart and burn the pieces. Nothing else can really harm us at all physically and we can't get sick."
"That's good!" I said nodding. "How old are you?"
"I have a different story than most. I was born this way. I only age until mid twenties then I stop."
"How does that work?"
"My parents are ancient vampires. Old royalty can give birth to vampire children. We age a little slower than human children but then we stop forever."
"So your family is pretty powerful then?"
"Are you afraid?"
"No why?"
"Your heartbeat sped up."
"You can hear that?"
"I can hear everything your body does." I blushed making him speak up again. "I'm sorry was that too much? I just want to be completely transparent."
"No, no, you're fine. I want to know everything!"
"Okay I just wanted to make sure. I don't want to overwhelm you."
"I can handle it."
"I know you can, I just worry."
"Are you guys all..you know?"
"You can say vampires (y/n). We don't mind. But yes the 5 of us all are."
"I thought so. You guys were really cliquey when I first met you."
"What do you mean?"
"You always just stuck together. When everyone broke away into smaller groups it was always you 5 and everyone else."
"Oh. Yeah I suppose we do, do that."
"Anyway you didn't answer me. How old are you guys?"
"I've been alive for 36 years but I'm only the equivalent of 24. Morgan is almost 100 years old."
"So Morgan's the leader?" I asked and he nodded before continuing.
"Kappy's almost 70, he joined Morgan about 20 years ago. He was a wild one, I'll let him tell you the story since I know he's been dying to."
"I'd like to hear about it!"
"Auston is around the same age as Kasperi. He was alone until he joined us when he got here. Mitchy is the baby, he was only turned 3 years ago."
"That must be so hard for him. Living with so many people around?"
"It was at first but he's better now."
"That's good. So did they get that part right? Newborn vampires are out of control?"
"Not as bad as twilight makes it sound." He said with a smirk. "But for the first couple months the thirst is intense."
"How did you find your way to Morgan?"
"I didn't like the way my parents worked, how they behaved. They were drunk on the fear people had for them. I don't want to scare people so I ran away when I was about 16 human years old. I started playing hockey and moved to Canada. I got picked up by the leafs and now here I am. I met up with Morgan when I got here in Toronto, I knew of him so I was looking for him."
"What happens to you guys if one gets traded?"
"We just go. We come back here for the off season. A couple years separated is nothing in the grand scheme of things."
"It sounds so simple." I teased.
"It's really not. I'm glad you know now though, that's going to make it much simpler."
"How come you told me?"
"Well I couldn't exactly leave it after my little display outside last night now could I?" He asked snorting.
"Well no but Mitch said you've been arguing with Auston because of a secret you wanted to tell but he didn't. So obviously you've been planning this."
"This is going to sound crazy."
"Crazier than all the rest of this? Try me."
"So you know how Morgan sees stuff?"
"Yeah. Hey do any others have gifts like that?"
"Mitchy can read minds when he stops his hyper shit and concentrates. Other than that none of us can. There are hundreds of powers out there though."
"That's cool!"
"Yes indeed." He murmured smiling warmly at me.
"Stop making my brain melt." I said giggling pushing his shoulder.
"Anyway back to what I was saying. Morgan saw you coming."
"He saw me?"
"Well he saw you with me."
"What do you mean?"
"Vampires have soulmates. Which sounds nuts because we don't have souls but that's the only way to put it. We're kind of like penguins, stay mated for life. We only have one so if it doesn't work out, that's it and we're alone."
"Oh wow no fucking pressure then!" I said sarcastically.
"Anywaaay." He drawled rolling his eyes with a small smile. "After I joined his coven I guess you'd call it, he started seeing my future. You're in it every step of the way." He finally looked into my eyes at that last part and I melted completely.
"Oh wow."
"Your heart is beating fast again. You're anxious, why?"
"I'm um.. a little overwhelmed I guess?"
"Why?"
"Well I wanted to be around for a long time and I felt like that would happen but to know that you've seen me there.."
"Technically Morgan saw you there. I didn't see anything, I just feel it. I feel very strongly for you."
"I love you." I said moving up the bed to hug him. He was stiff for a minute but then relaxed and held me softly. I pulled back with a smile on my face. "I'm not gonna break if you hold me a little tighter than that."
"I just don't want to push you or anything. This is a lot to take in, I don't want you to be uncomfortable."
"William I'm not. Can't you see that? I don't care what you are. I love you and I know you're not going to eat me so it's okay."
"I was wondering when what I eat would come up."
"I'm not worried about it. As long as I'm not in any danger I couldn't care less. You don't demand to know what I eat usually." I said eyeing him up.
"Well if you weren't so stubborn and would eat as much as I know you need to I wouldn't have to ask! You don't take care of your body the way I want you to."
"Whatever I'm trying."
"I know, love. You're doing good."
"Anyway since it's been brought up I am curious about what you eat."
"I eat mostly animals. We all do. Probably twice a month but we need human blood too once a month or so. We use blood bags instead of people. As I said I don't want people scared."
"Wouldn't it be better warm?" I slapped my hand over my mouth in embarrassment. "I'm so sorry ignore me."
"No, I want to know what you're thinking." He pulled my hands down and looked at me pouting with a big smile spreading across his face. "I love it when you blush. You look do cute with red cheeks."
"Stoooop!" I moaned blushing harder.
"Blood is better warm but that's what we get from animals. We don't want drinking human blood to be pleasant."
"That is fair enough."
We were quiet for a minute as I took in what he was saying. I couldn't say I was surprised at all. The way these boys acted and played the game was a little unbelievable. And the way they all looked. Barely human, more angelic looking than anything. I started thinking back at all the weird things like him hearing my phone vibrate in the bar, how fast he got to my house when I was scared, how he never really ate, how he was never cold. It all started making a lot of sense.
"Have I scared you?"
"Are you dumb? I'm not scared of you." I asked giving him a weird look.
"I just wanted to check. Do you think you'd be okay to go talk with the rest of the boys?"
"I'm fine babe. Are you ready for me to go talk with the boys?" I could tell by the way his eyes momentarily went wide that my question caught him off guard.
"Everything I just told you and you're concerning yourself with me?"
"Always." I said taking his hand in mine.
"I'd like you to know if I could blush I would be right now." He said quietly.
"Cute." I said pecking his lips.
"I am worried about you talking to them."
"Why?"
"I'm worried mostly about Auston. He's still mad that you know."
"Auston can fucking bite me." I said bitterly without thinking. "Shit wait no no i don't want that at all I take it back!"
"You're so funny. As if I'd ever let anyone else bite you." He said in a teasing tone.
"Hey, hey, hey, wait! You're planning on biting me?!"
"Not anytime soon. And I'm not planning it at all. Morgan said that he sees that it's your idea completely. You beg for me to do it."
"Not the only thing I'd beg for." I mumbled.
"What?"
"What?" I asked pretending I didn't say anything.
"I literally hear everything (y/n). I know exactly what you said. And you might not want to think stuff like that. I kinda asked Mitch to listen in to see how you would take everything."
"Are you kidding me?! Oh my God!" I smacked my forehead as if that would get the image of me on my knees begging William out of my head. It didn't. I was just more aware of those thoughts which made me think of them more. "I hate it here!" I yelled dramatically falling back on the bed.
"It's not a big deal, he's used to it."
"Yes it is!"
"He's not going to judge you."
"He will!"
"No I won't." Mitch said walking into the room and flopping down on the bed beside me.
"Uuugh." I groaned covering my face with a pillow.
"Nice to see you again too. Willy Morgan wants to talk to you. Something about Aus' bullshit probably."
"Alright. I'll be back soon, love." He got up and left leaving the room silent.
"So you know now huh?"
"Yup."
"You still want us around?"
"What the fuck do you mean?" I pulled the pillow away from my face. "Of course I still want you guys around."
"Sometimes it takes some time to come around that's all. Morgan's girlfriend took forever. She wouldn't see us for like 6 months because she was upset and felt betrayed. You just never know. Well unless you're Morgan."
"So she knows too?"
"Yup she knows everything."
"Does your girlfriend know?"
"No Steph has no idea. I don't think I'll ever tell her honestly."
"Why?"
"I'll tell you some other time."
"Do you think he was wrong to tell me?"
"Absolutely not. Seeing William happy is the best! He hasn't seen what Morgan has seen but I have. Sorry for snooping, it was just exciting! I couldn't help it."
"What does it look like..?" I asked quietly.
"It looks like complete happiness. Everything you've both ever wanted in life is going to come to you. It's kind of really fast moving from here though."
"Do I end up like you guys..?"
"I don't want to tell you the details of your future." He said carefully after considering for a second.
"I don't want to know everything I just want to know if I'm gonna get old and ugly while he stays gorgeous.. " I blushed and Mitch laughed.
"That's such a silly thing to worry about! Don't worry. You're not going to get old and gross. But that's all you're getting from me!"
"That's good enough for me." I said as William walked back in.
"Are you ready to see the guys? They want to talk to you, especially Morgan."
"Yeah sure." I said getting up walking over to him. I hugged him tight around his waist and leaned up to give him a kiss. "Let's go."
"Uh yeah sure." He took my hand and led me down the hallway of the spacious house. I took in my surroundings with awe. The house was beautiful. A perfect balance of dark and light. There was modern furniture but a lot of antiques surrounding it all. When he brought me around the corner I saw all the guys sitting there. Even Mitch which surprised me but then I realized that these guys were faster than anything. Auston looked salty, but he always did.
"(Y/n) please sit." Morgan said with a smile, gesturing to the love seat across from him. I did as I was told while William and Mitch sat on either side of me. "How are you feeling?"
"Um I'm okay. How are you guys?"
"We're well."
"Speak for yourself." Auston mumbled while Morgan sighed.
"For the most part we're well. You've learned a lot of new information today."
"Yeah I have."
"How do you feel about that?"
"Not bad. I have a lot of questions but I don't think I'm in danger so I'm feeling good I think."
"I'm surprised she didn't go into shock." Kasperi teased.
"Come on give her some credit!" Mitch defended.
"Yeah Kas come on. I'm tougher than that."
"You realize that you knowing this is a big deal don't you?" Morgan asked.
"Of course I do!"
"You realize that means you can't tell anyone right? Not even your dumb photography friend? And especially not your reporter friend?" Auston spit out.
"Obviously I would never ever do that Auston."
"Girls tell secrets."
"Not one like this!"
"How can we know that?"
"Auston you're honestly being ridiculous right now. I would never do that to you guys." I looked at William who was avoiding my eyes. I grabbed his hand desperately trying to keep tears out of my eyes from the confrontation. "Will, baby, you know that don't you? That I would never hurt you and your family like that?"
"I'm a little worried."
"What?!"
"See if he's worried, I should be too."
I just stayed quiet. Ripped my hand from William's, wiped a tear roughly from my cheek, and crossed my arms. William tried to hold my hand again but I pulled back.
"Don't."
"Guys she's not going to say anything." Mitch said, sounding bored with the whole thing.
"(Y/n) why don't we speak in private?" Morgan said carefully.
"Okay." I got up despite William's protest and went with Morgan to his office.
"I'm sorry about them. They're both idiots."
"I feel like I'm in trouble in a principal's office." I said laughing with him.
"Well I promise you aren't in trouble at all. I don't know how much William has told you about me.."
"Um he just said you were the oldest, the leader, and that you can see the future but he never elaborated on anything."
"Everything I see is definite. There are no areas where it changes. What I see is what happens. I've never been wrong in my hundred years. This is why I'm so sure that you won't tell anyone anything."
"Even if you didn't see it I'd never tell. It's not my secret to tell."
"The boys are just worried. It's been a long time since we've told anybody. The last one was my girlfriend 2 years ago. The last before that was 65 years ago. Auston and Kasperi have had some bad experiences. Mitch isn't worried because he can see inside everyone's heads. He can see how your mind works, he knows like I do. In fact I can tell you the next time you willingly on your own tell someone about vampires and it's not for another 20 years."
"What exactly does that mean?"
"There will be a time in approximately 4 months that you will say something."
"I don't think I'd share that but I'm not willing to bet against you that I won't. I'm sorry that I do that."
"It's nothing to be sorry about. When you do it, it's out of necessity, survival."
"I'm still sorry."
"I'm sorry that William is being untrusting. It seems Auston has gotten into his head."
"Not a big deal." I shrugged.
"It is. Trust is the most important thing. To know you're not trusted is a punch in the stomach." I raised an eyebrow at him and he continued. "When I got with Tessa and told her everything she didn't trust me right away. She thought I was going to feed off her or change her without permission. It was incredibly difficult."
"It all worked out though right?"
"Yes of course! I promise things will smooth over between you and William."
"Thank you Morgan. I really appreciate it."
"I'm going to let you go since we all have places to get ready to be soon. Mitch will drop you off at your home."
"Thanks. Good luck at the game tonight."
"Thank you. See you later."
"Bye." I let myself out. I didn't like to be told what to do but something about the authority in his voice made me not question or talk back. Mitch was standing down the hall a bit.
"Hey, you ready to go?"
"Absolutely. No offense but I don't want to be here right now."
"That's totally fair. I'm sick of hearing Auston's thoughts right now."
He started towards the door and I followed as close behind as I could manage. Once we got outside I was in awe. I always loved the forest and this was taking forest living to another level.
"How come you're sick of hearing him?"
"I'm always pretty sick of hearing him these days."
"Is it my fault?"
"What no! That's actually a welcome distraction. He's hiding something from me."
I was looking out the window as we drove but that shocked me enough to look at him. I was very confused and he could probably tell because he snickered at me.
"How the fuck could he do that?"
"He's had experience with people like me. He knows how to block thoughts from me. It's so annoying bro."
"I'd like to learn that." I said thinking back to what William said earlier.
"(Y/n) I couldn't care less what you want to do to William or have him do to you. Be as kinky as you want. I'll tell you what I'm into if that'll help?"
"Uh maybe next time." I said laughing with him.
"In all honesty I could probably help! If he's not doing it right I could tell him how to do it better."
"As sweet as that is Mitchy, I think I'd rather see how he fucks first before I call in mental backup."
"You guys haven't fucked yet?"
"No. He didn't want to while there was still secrets."
"That's nice of him I suppose. I could never do that."
"I like that he's patient. I've been through a lot of bad stuff with men.." before I could stop thinking Mitch interrupted me as we pulled into my driveway.
"I'm so fucking sorry that happened to you." He pulled me into a hug and I let a tear slip out.
"It's okay, it's done."
"It might be done but it haunts you. Have you told Willy?"
"Not yet. I will before I sleep with him though. I don't want secrets either. But now I don't know if I even should. If he can't trust me, can I trust him?"
"Auston is in his head. That's literally all it is. Wills deep thoughts know and trust you. His surface thoughts are frazzled."
"Well he's being shitty and can honestly just get fucked." I said making him laugh.
"That's fair."
"I'll see you guys tonight!"
"We'll be listening for you."
"Sorry what?" I asked half out of the car.
"William is going to want to know when you get there. So he's gonna listen for your voice and I'll be listening for your thoughts. Just to calm him down."
"Well in that case I'm gonna talk shit and think get fucked the whole time." I said laughing with him.
"I can't wait to play hockey with an angry William."
"See ya." I got out of the car and went to my house. I cried a little but then got ready to go.
#nhl imagine#nhl story#hockey#hockey story#hockey imagines#hockey imagine#maple leaf imagine#toronto maple leafs#leafs#maple leafs#william nylander#william nylander x reader#mitch marner#kasperi kapanen#morgan rielly#auston matthews#halloween#vampire
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Day 4 of Moms Made Fullmetal Week!
Prompt: Victory or Responsibility or Homework
AO3 link here
Enjoy reading!
Izumi Curtis has never experienced this level of exhaustion.
Considering the fact that she once got trapped in a collapsing mine (long story), wrestled a bear, and survived a month of the bitter cold wilderness up near Briggs, saying she was exhausted is really something.
But here she was, fatigue right into her very bones, looking out the view of her hospital window at the nearby ruins that were once the Central Headquarters. The once pristine front of the military base is now littered with missile holes, a tattered flag of Amestris hanging from a snapped pole. Izumi knew that the inside looked far worse, with an entire building almost gone because the monster, the one the homunculus called Father, had blasted off with the incredible power of God.
Right after Ed returns from the Gate of Truth, clutching the frail thin body of his younger brother Al, the officers that are present promptly get to work. They got Al, who upon coming back, immediately collapsed to the ground, possibly from exhaustion. Izumi remembers the way Hohenheim trembled at the sight of Al and despite the evident lack of strength to even support himself, he surged forward toward his sons.
The injured were immediately rushed to Central Hospital while the rest of the men went inside to try and capture those who were in it with Bradley’s plan. Most of them are high ranking officers that are arrested and are now in jail awaiting trial. Mustang’s team sent out a statement declaring that it was a coup instead of saying it was an all powered individual who almost sacrificed their souls for more power than he was capable of containing.
She leaned back in the hospital bed, turning her head to the side to loosen it up from being stiff. It has definitely been a while since she got into a battle, much less something as big and destructive as this one. Sure, she’s gone into some trouble before but since teaching those two boys, she hasn’t taken any more students and her alchemy is affecting her condition so she hasn’t done anything very tiring yet. That’s why when the battle was over and the adrenaline running through her body had worn off, Izumi wasn’t surprised when she started coughing up blood. Terrified, the officers around her immediately hauled her off to the hospital.
Sig came rushing in as soon as he heard, now the man was hunched over into himself, squeezing himself in that chair that was obviously too small for him. A smile slowly slipped into her lips as she looked at her husband. Despite everything they went through, he still stayed behind and left her to fight. That was one of the reasons why she fell in love with him in the first place. He doesn’t treat her like a fragile little thing, even before her condition, she wasn’t treated like a vase that is vulnerable to breaking. Sig knows she’s strong and he acknowledges that.
After getting a scolding from the doctor about overdoing it, she was confined to a week in the hospital for further observation and once she gets home, she has to be in bed rest and limited physical activities.
Izumi had just started to slip back to sleep when the creak of the door brought her back. Turning towards the sound, Edward’s head popped out the open door.
“Hey, Teacher. There’s someone who wanted to see you.” His blond head went back and he came back wheeling Alphonse in on a wheelchair. Ed pushed his brother at the side of her bed and for the first time since Alphonse finally got his body back that she studied him.
Gaunt cheeks, thin pale lips, his hospital gown is hanging on his body, a blanket was thrown around his shoulders. His arms and legs are almost to the bone. He honestly looked terrible but when Izumi looked into his eyes, she unexpectedly teared up.
Pure unadulterated joy, his golden eyes dancing with mirth with the feeling of having the only thing he has been working hard for all these years. Alphonse slowly lifted a thin hand from his lap and rested it on her knee. Despite the blanket covering her legs, she could feel the warmth from his bony hand.
That was the moment when Izumi, the housewife, started crying.
Twin expressions of disbelief stared at her as she hastily brushed the tears away and tried to reel in her emotions. These two boys who had their years robbed away, who had to become adults to correct the mistake they made, after all the tragedy that is their life, as she stared at Al’s hand on her knee and Ed’s arm resting over the back of his brother’s wheelchair, they finally have what they wanted the most.
Izumi lets out an embarrassed laugh, “Sorry. It must’ve been a surprise to see your amazing master suddenly cry.” She smiled at them. “It’s so nice to see you, Alphonse. Aren’t you supposed to be resting?”
“I told him he needed to rest but he insisted on visiting you first.” Ed’s words warmed her heart. She chuckled slightly, “I’m going to be here for a week. Doctor’s orders. You can visit me anytime you want while I’m here.”
“I wanted to pay everyone a visit first. Besides, the sun’s down and I’ve just woken up. The doctors said that my body was just catching up with time and needed more rest from time to time.” Al grinned, “I haven’t been able to sleep for a while so I’m still getting used to the idea again.”
While Ed has a very explosive type of personality, Izumi would say that Al is like a lamp, steady and stable. He’s very quiet but he wears his heart on his sleeve. When the boys visited her back home and Izumi realized what had happened, she laid down on her bed that night and cried. She doesn’t show emotions around the two before but what they went through is a very familiar feeling. The sense of longing and loss, doing anything to bring back what was gone and suddenly having something taken away from you for the taboo you committed is a feeling she knows all too well. And for a moment, she blamed herself for now seeing the signs. Maybe she could’ve changed both of their minds. But in the end, she knows no amount of explanation could change a determined alchemist.
Sig has tried to warn her about going too far but the guilt is way too strong, too loud enough to drown out the voice of reason in her mind. Now years later, she still pays for that mistake.
When she received that call from Ed, confirming that the thing she brought back that fateful night was not her unborn child, she felt no regret, like Sig had expected, but joy. That her child did not suffer more than she thought. However, despite having a huge weight off her chest, she couldn’t shake the fact that she still needs to do something for the two orphans she took in.
She has been around Al when he was still attached to the armor and while a lot of people coveted the ability to be almost indestructible, she knows Alphonse. Despite this power, the only thing he wants is the simplest things, to be able to eat, sleep, and feel much like any other human being. The way he craved his mother.
Seeing him now with a smile on his face, his voice warm and giddy, and his eyes bright and laughing at something his brother said, Izumi could help but feel that last weight is gone. She had done what she could and left the rest for the Elrics to do their part to get what they wanted at the end. Normalcy.
“Why do you want to visit that bastard anyway? He’s just a big baby.” Ed pouted. Al frowned, “That’s not very nice, brother. Colonel lost his eyesight too.” Both of them went silent for a few minutes.
Ed grumbled, “I guess we can spare some time. I wanted to visit Lieutenant Hawkeye too and I am very sure that Colonel Bastard pulled some strings to be put in the same room. I swear he’s very clingy at Hawkeye. It’s like a little kid clutching his momma’s skirt.” Al simply smiled at his brother’s antics.
It is hilarious how these two, just hours earlier, were one of the youngest alchemists who fought an immortal being, survived the battle, and won.
“You two should go rest, especially you, Al. Make sure to eat a lot. I’ll make a brisket when you visit me back in-" A coughing fit interrupted her, she pressed her handkerchief against her mouth. When she drew it away, the white cloth was stained with blood. “Izumi-" Sig began to stand, but she waved him away, saying he’s fine without words. Her husband sat back down, still worried.
Ed rushed towards the table beside her to pour water from a pitcher. He handed it to her. “You’re the one who should be resting.” Alphonse admonished her. “You should push yourself too hard.” She took the cup and drank the entire thing.
“Al’s right. The battle took a toll on you, I can see it. I know you wanted to sleep, your eyes are drooping. We’ll leave now and visit some other time.” Ed decided and waved to Sig, who waved back with a smile.
The older Elric grabbed the wheelchair handles and pulled his brother away from the bed.
Al promised to come back tomorrow morning for lunch and the two brothers left and closed the door with a click.
Sig finally stood up and rubbed her back, “Are you sure, you’re fine?” his huge hands lightly cupping her shoulders. She rested her hand over one of his and smiled back. “I’m fine. It helped that those two rascals came to visit too. Made my day seem normal with the two of them bickering in here. I forgot I just fought a homunculus and unleashed everything I had on a being that had the power of God.” Izumi snickered at the thought. “Those two grew surrounded by the weirdest things, they were able to still act like their normal selves after what had just happened.”
“You’re a good mother, Izumi.” Sig’s deep voice declared.
She looked up and he was staring at her with eyes filled with love and dedication. “What?”
Sig sank down to sit by her side and said, “You’re a good mom. I know those two didn’t come from you and I know they annoy you to hell sometimes but still, you treat them as if they’re ours. And even back then when you told me you’re relieved that it wasn’t our baby the one you brought back, I know you didn’t want them to suffer. If not wanting your children to suffer, putting their needs and emotions before yourself isn’t being a parent, then I don’t know what is.”
“There’s more to being a parent than that, Sig.” Izumi said. “I know,” he replied. “But you have all those. You just have to see it for yourself.”
“Who are you and what have you done with my husband?” Izumi jokes, trying to lighten up the mood. Sig has always been steadfast and quiet. It’s not common for him to be saying things like this. “Why are you going sappy on me?” she asked.
“Because I’ve seen the way you look after those two.” He jerked a thumb towards the door, indicating the brothers. “You don’t show it, but you hover over them. It’s really amusing to watch. Trying tough love when you’re really a softie inside.” Sig chuckled when Izumi lightly slapped his hand. “But seriously, Izumi. You would’ve been a great mom.”
She felt the tears well up when she said, “You would’ve been the best father too.”
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May it be
Title: May it be
Rating: T
Pairing: Valkyrie (Brunnhilde) x Reader
Summary: It was your job to raise the last Asgardian Pegasus. And you do so, with a little help from the last Valkyrie.
Word count: 4411
Warnings: End Game spoilers. Some Lord of the Rings quotes and references. There’s a lot of time jumps...like... a lot.
Notes: This came about from my crush on Tessa Thompson and from learning that the Pegasus Valkyrie rode in End Game is named Aragorn.
~
Do not panic. Focus. You must protect the egg at all costs. Ignore the screams. Ignore the blood. Ignore...your family. They’re already gone.
“Leave it! Don’t take anything, just run!” Valkyrie’s voice rang over the chaos as she urged as many people to the escape pods as possible.
You ran towards her voice, but as you saw people drop their precious items following her command you did what was probably the stupidest thing in all of Asgardian history. You stuffed the large egg into your tunic and held onto it like you’d seen pregnant women holding their bellies. Someone, a kind soul you would never forget but sadly would never learn his name, ushered you to the front when he saw your “belly”.
Together with Thor, Valkyrie blocked an attack headed in the direction of those evacuating. Just as you entered the escape pod, Thor pushed her into it with you, “Go!” He yelled as he slammed the door shut, locking her in the escape pod as he continued to fight off Thanos’s invasion.
Valkyrie screamed for her king, her friend, and pounded on the door before it took off from the main ship and headed to its destination: Midgard.
~*~
No one dared to approach Valkyrie for hours, she was still fuming. But she, like everyone else, was also mourning. You were the first to speak to her. You sat down next to her, the seat had opened up when things became stable enough that people could stretch their legs. Many people were just pacing out nervous energy.
“Thank you,” you said softly.
Her head snapped to you, eyes red from tears, and she glared at you. “For what?”
You weren’t going to be intimidated by her anger. She was a warrior, after all, and likely felt that her place wasn’t here with the women and children. Nervously you wrapped your arms around the egg inside your tunic, “For saving us.”
Valkyrie’s bloodshot eyes looked you up and down before settling on your hands around your belly. For a moment her eyes softened then she looked away with a scoff. “I didn’t save everyone.”
You hummed, “Thor, Loki and Heimdall. And the Hulk,” you added as an afterthought, still not used to the shape shifting midgardian. “Are there. They’ll avenge our people and meet us in New Asgard.” They were either gods or indestructible, after all.
~*~
It wasn’t until you arrived on Midgard and not only did Thor and the others not follow, something worse happened, that you realized how wrong your words had been. The already decimated Asgardian population was cut in half yet again. You were cooking over an open fire pit, no shelters had been built yet, when the man you were serving faded into dust, the bowl in his hands falling to the ground with a clatter.
Your heart dropped and you called out to the one person who had been holding the asgardians together. “Brunnhilde!” You called her given name, not her title, as you ran, hoping and praying as you ran through ashes that she wasn’t one of them. If she faded too, Asgard would truly be lost.
Valkyrie was kneeling on the ground, the form of a fellow Asgardian fading in her arms as she frantically asked them to hold on. They didn’t.
“Brunnhilde!” You yelled again, catching her attention.
Her head snapped up as your voice reached her ears. She quickly stood up and ran to you, wrapping you up in her arms as you threw yourself at her. You were shaking, fear seizing even the marrow in your bones as you cried into her shoulder. “W...What’s happening?” You hiccuped between sobs.
She held you tighter, as if you might fade to dust too and could only whisper, “I don’t know.”
~*~
Thor returned.
But Loki and Heimdall did not.
~*~
It had been about a month since Thanos’ death and New Asgard continued. Thor had retreated into himself, too hurt by the double loss of his brother and his best friend to do anything other than drink.
Life moves on and you tried your best to keep up. You were just finishing up your meal, you were always the last to eat as it was your job to serve the communal meal, when Brunnhilde came up to you.
“Hey, you just about done here? I want to talk to you.”
You nodded, “Of course, m’lady.”
Afterall, she was essentially Asgard’s interim ruler.
You took a moment to quickly clean up before you followed her. She led you to where no one could overhear and your heart skipped a beat. Over the last few weeks you had worked closely with the lone Valkyrie, was this a sign that she felt just as close to you as you did her?
She cleared her throat, “I’ve been meaning to ask. What, uhm, what happened to your baby?”
You paled and dropped your hands to your flat tummy. At first you were able to hide the fact that you didn’t have a round belly with baggy clothing, it’s not like anyone was wearing anything extravagant in New Asgard. The physical labor that went into building New Asgard into a livable place and community combined with the fact the food wasn’t nearly as rich as you were used to had begun to melt the extra fat you were carrying around your midsection. It seemed you were no longer able to pull off being a pregnant woman.
“...About that…”
You led her to your little cabin, painfully aware that you’d been given your own space precisely because people thought you were pregnant. Inside the cabin there was a fire pit, which took up most of the space, and a simple bedroll off to the side. No other amenities graced your cabin, but you had taken up some effort to decorate the bare walls with your own woven tapestry.
You kneeled down in front of the banked coals of the fire pit, they were still hot and glowing just a little, and started to dig up a bundle of the same simple woven design as the wall tapestries. You stared at the warm bundle now in your lap. If you admitted that you got passage on one of the escape pods because you feigned a pregnancy...well, depending on how harsh others saw it, the penalty could be death.
“This,” you took a deep breath, “is what I was hiding in my tunic.” You carefully unwrapped the bundle and showed her.
She blinked a few times and looked at you incredulously. “An egg? You were hiding an egg?”
You nodded and softly rubbed a circle on the smooth white shell. “A pegasus egg.”
Her eyebrows shot up and she kneeled down in the soft earth next to you and stared at the egg in awe. “How did you get this?”
“There a several subspecies of pegasi, but only one native to Asgard. They were already endangered prior to Ragnarok. And now this is the last egg of the species. My family was part of the effort to breed them,” you paused to swallow the sob that nearly came up as you remembered your family. “We managed to save an entire clutch before...before…”
You blinked back tears and looked up at her, braving looking into the warm depths of her eyes. “I know it was wrong of me to pretend that I was pregnant, but I had to think quickly. Sentence me to death if you must, but protect the egg. It is the last of its species. It deserves to live.”
Brunnhilde stared into your eyes as she listened to your speech. She looked down at the egg then back at you with a small smile and placed a comforting hand on your shoulder. “Enough Asgardians have died. Besides, you were right. It was worth the effort to save this egg.”
You let out a shaky breath, glad that you weren’t going to die. “Thank you!” Without thinking you wrapped an arm around her, your other hand keeping a gentle hold on the egg.
Brunnhilde hesitated for a second but returned your hug. She pulled away with a smile and looked at the egg again, “How long until it hatches?”
You hummed in thought as you tried to calculate when the pegasus would hatch. “It will be months yet. Pegasi take a long time to incubate.” You wrapped up the egg again and set it back on the soft sand and covering it so that the heat would not dissipate.
She stood up and dusted off her knees, “Right. Well, if you need anything for this little guy or girl, you let me know.”
You nodded and smiled up at her. “Thank you.”
~*~
Five months later Thor, Brunnhilde and the last of the Asgardian nobles had their own houses. Houses, not cabins or huts, but proper Midgardian houses. Running water, electricity and all.
You were still living in your small cabin with the firepit, caring for the last Asgardian pegasus egg. You had just covered the egg back up when Brunnhilde walked in, without knocking, wearing a huge grin on her face. “Guess who got Dish!”
Taking another second to make sure the egg was secure, you smiled, “Thor did. He’s been telling everyone.” It was nice to see your king in some kind of high spirits, even if it was because of some Midgardian distraction.
She rolled her eyes, “No! Me!”
This time you turned your smile on her, “Wonderful. Do you have this Cinemax that Thor keeps speaking of?”
She nodded and tugged your arm, “Come!”
You giggled as she nearly lifted you off the ground in her excitement. Midgard was taking some time to get used to, but it certainly had some benefits that Asgard didn’t have. Despite all the horrible things that happened, if they hadn’t happened you wouldn’t have met your best friend.
Settled on Brunnhilde’s couch, much more comfortable than the sleeping roll you insisted on keeping (since you still felt guilty about lying to the Asgardians about your pregnancy), the two of you decided on a movie.
“The first installment of the trilogy based on J.R.R. Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings.” She read aloud after several wasted minutes of scrolling through what looked like nonsense. “Sound good?”
You nodded, “Sounds better than the other stuff.”
As the movie started you pondered, “Does that mean there are more movies?”
“Think so. And books. These Midgardians really know how to kill time.” The two of you laughed and leaned against each other.
That laughter quickly quieted as the movie started with an ominous whisper and an even more ominous narration. One that hit almost too close to the heart.
“The world is changed.”
You spent much of the next two days locked in Brunnhilde’s house watching this Midgardian epic. Together you laughed, cheered and maybe shed a few tears for these fictional characters. The tale of the Fellowship was truly inspiring and you could not get enough. There were more Tolkien movies. So you spent every night possible with Brunnhilde watching movies and dreaming of Middle-Earth.
~*~
Brunnhilde liked the story of Middle-Earth as much as you did. She surprised you one night by showing you a collection of books, from the trilogy that spawned your now favorite movies to other collections by Tolkien.
You were not a warrior like her, even if it came time for her to fight again, you could not travel with her. She would never allow you to put yourself in danger like that. But you could travel throughout Middle-Earth together. Not hand in hand, but head in lap, as it was now.
She was resting after a tiring day, Thor had been particularly prickly and she had to deal with him and the rest of the Asgardians, and wanted nothing more than to relax. She almost sent you away when you knocked on her door, but stopped herself. Partly because you were holding a sweet snack that you had baked and partly because all she needed was to hear the sweet ring of your voice to chase away the headache.
Even with her eyes closed and an arm thrown over her face, you could tell she was listening to you as you read aloud The Council of Elrond to her.
“All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.
From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
A light from the shadows shall spring;
Renewed shall be the blade that is broken:
The crownless again shall be king.”
“Mmm. That’s beautiful.” She interrupted you, making you giggle.
“Let me finish the paragraph at least!” You chided.
She moved her arm down and grinned up at you. “Ok! Ok! Please continue, my lady.” She teased, smiling even more as you blushed at her words.
You cleared your throat and continued in your best Bilbo voice: “Not very good perhaps-”
Bilbo’s own dismissal of his verse sent you and Brunnhilde into a fit of giggles. “See! You stopped me too soon!” You chuckled.
Though Brunnhilde still smiled, she looked up at you wistfully. “He’s just being modest. Don’t you think it’s beautiful?”
You glanced away from the book and into her eyes. This little passage resonated with her, with the plight of New Asgard. You smiled softly at her. “Of course. But we keep interrupting the council.”
She chuckled. “Well, we can’t keep the council waiting.”
You finished the chapter, stopping before the Fellowship embarked on their journey south.
Some nights you read to Brunnhilde. Some nights she read to you. Some nights you just enjoyed each other's company.
~*~
You never forgot your mission, you reason for being in New Asgard. You were to hatch and raise the last Asgardian pegasus. You couldn’t save the species, but it would be an honor to have Brunnhilde, the last Valkyrie take your pegasus as her personal mount. She didn’t know this though, you didn't have the words to ask her yet.
At least she was there for you and the egg. You were in your cabin, Brunnhilde sitting near the fire pit as you checked on the egg.
One of dark brows raised as she saw you unwrap the bundle and check the egg for any mars. “It’s bigger!” She exclaimed.
You nodded. “They are magical creatures. It is said that in days long past, the best pegasus breeders could get their eggs to grow so large that it would hatch a fully grown pegasus.”
“That can’t be true!” She scoffed and took a swig of the beer she had in hand.
You shrugged and wrapped up the egg again. A part of you wanted to ask her if she could remember any such thing. She was older than you, the Valkyrie being hardly more than myth by the time you were old enough to begin your career as a breeder. Surely she saw many pegasi in her day, wouldn’t she know?
Almost as if she could read your mind she glared at you. You knew her well enough to know that she didn’t like talking about her time as a Valkyrie, before Hela, the goddess of death, killed every other Valkyrie. And she knew you well enough to know that was exactly what you were thinking.
But you hadn’t said anything, too well mannered to speak your thoughts aloud, and so she had no reason to be mad at you. Even though she was. “Right. Well, I’m off.” She grunted, throwing the empty beer bottle into the recycling bin you had in the corner with enough force to shatter it.
You hid your small flinch and didn’t move, “G’night.” you replied weakly.
She grunted again and stormed off, leaving you with a mystery you might never know the answer to.
~*~
You were asleep in your cabin, now furnished with a more comfortable bed (Brunnhilde’s apology gift) when you heard something scratching the sand near your fire pit. Your eyes snapped open and adjusted to the dim light of banked coals. There was no mistaking it! The egg was hatching! You jumped up and pulled the egg from the sand and unwrapped it, though you kept it balanced on the blanket near the warm coals.
“Hang on, little buddy!” You said as you stuffed your feet in slippers and ran out of your cabin.
“‘Hilde! Brunnhilde! Valkyrie!” You yelled as you pounded on her door.
She was quick, even rattled from sleep. “What? Is something wrong?”
“It’s hatching!” You grabbed her hand and pulled her back to your cabin, not that she needed the extra encouragement. Your words were enough to fuel her to sprint to the egg.
It was still some hours before the egg hatched, the initial excitement wearing down slightly but still buzzing under your skin. The two of you ended up watching the fire pit perched on your bed.
“What do you think we should name it?” You asked as you leaned forward at another crack forming along the side of the egg.
“Don’t you think we should wait to see if it’s a boy or girl, first?” She replied.
“I suppose you’re right.” That didn’t stop you from mentally scanning a list of names you already had in mind. Most were names of fallen Asgardians but you couldn’t bring yourself to say them aloud, especially not near Valkyrie; the pain of losing fellow warriors was too close to her heart still.
“What about Shadowfax?” She asked suddenly, looking at you and thinking of the wild horse that Gandalf used as a steed.
You chuckled, “Well, if it looks anything like it’s parents, it would be an appropriate name.”
She blinked, “You know what it’s parents looked like?”
Both a surge of pride and sadness swelled in you, you chose to focus on the pride. “Of course! I think it may have undersold just how big a role my family played in the breeding program. We had the largest stable of pegasi on Asgard. Though, in honesty, even that wasn’t very large. Pegasus are known to be finicky in choosing their mates and they mate for life. But still! I long ago memorized every sire and mare and offspring.”
“They mate for life?”
You nodded sadly. “It’s part of the reason why their number remained so small. And now…” You trialed off, unwilling to admit that though you saved this egg, one pegasus alone could not save it’s species from extinction.
Whatever comforting words she might have said died before they passed her lips. The first audible crack from the egg made the both of you jump up and rush closer to it. It rocked from side to side and you could even hear little whines as the miniature pegasus forced its hooves through the fragile shell of it’s egg.
Next to you, Brunnhilde gasped and reached out to pick a piece of the shell off.
“No!” You quickly stopped her by grabbing her hand. “You have to let them do it themselves.” You explained.
“Right. Sorry.” She apologized quietly, still entranced by the sight of the pegasus hatching and still holding onto your hand.
Finally, the baby pegasus pushed a large piece of the shell off it’s tiny head, and tumbled out of the egg. It was about the size of a house cat and pure white, with pin feathered wings stretching along its back. It gave a high pitched whinny and stumbled on it’s long legs around you and Valkyrie.
“It’s so small!” She exclaimed with wide eyes and an even wider smile. “Is it really going to grow as big as the winged steeds I’ve seen before?”
You giggled at the sight of the baby attempting to run around the two of you, looking up at you like you were his parents. “Yep! It’ll be four years before he’s fully grown.”
“It’s a boy!” She gasped out, clapping her hands together.
The pegasus pranced over to you and nudged you, smelling the bottle of milk that you had prepared while you were waiting for it to hatch.
“May I?” She asked to pet the small creature while it started to drink the offered bottle.
You nodded, “Just be careful of his wings.”
She gently caressed a single finger down the foal’s back, between his wings. “What about Aragorn?” She asked looking up to you.
You smiled as you glanced at her and nodded. “Aragorn? Yes. It suits him perfectly.”
He’ll be a king.
~*~
You babied Aragorn for a month, allowed Brunnhilde and the other Asgardians to indulge him, but after a month he no longer needed to be bottle fed. That was when you began training him. First you started with getting him used to carrying things on his back. The residents of New Asgard thought it was the cutest thing to have the young pegasus deliver their items strapped in saddle bags.
Then you trained him in proper use of his wings. This was not only difficult, for you had no older and calmer pegasus to help teach him, but there were times when the young colt dashed off into the air where you could not follow. Thor was a major help here, you or Valkyrie would run to Thor’s house and he’d fly after Aragorn and bring him back. These were small moments where the old Thor shined through, a gentle soul willing to do anything to help those in need.
By time you, Brunnhilde and Thor had earned Aragorn’s trust and love, he was big enough that he could carry smaller riders. You were the first to jump onto his back, Valkyrie and Thor there ready to catch you if you were thrown off mid-air.
While you were getting Aragorn used to having a rider, Brunnhilde set up a training course for him. It wasn’t just jumps on the ground, but obstacles that were suspended mid-air. You trusted that she knew what she was doing here. After all, your family might have been excellent pegasi breeders and trained the juvenile pegasi, but Brunnhilde was a Valkyrie, she know how to maneuver a pegasus in battle.
~*~
Brunnhilde continued to train him daily, performing extraordinary aerial maneuvers, but it was still years of Aragorn serving as a glorified delivery mount. Until the day when those who vanished returned.
You were taking a stroll in the hills of New Asgard when you saw the flickering magical sparks. “What is that, Aragorn? Let’s go check it out.”
As you rode through New Asgard you saw faces you hadn’t seen since the snap. Confused but ever determined to find out what you were seeing, you looked for your trusted partner. You used the vantage of being airborne to find her.
Valkyrie, for that was who she was in full battle gear like that, was standing in front of a full unit of battle ready Einherjar, Asgardian warriors. She was giving them a rousing speech, at least that’s what you thought she was saying, you were still too far away to hear her properly. Magical sparks appeared again as a wizard opened a portal and Valkyrie was ready to step through.
“Wait! Brunnhilde!” You called, rushing Aragorn to meet her and the warriors before they stepped through the portal.
As Aragorn’s hooves hit the ground, Brunnhilde turned, her royal blue cloak swirling around her and her long braid swinging over her shoulder. Her shining armor matched Aragorn’s coat, the golden lines of her armor reflecting the sunset and complementing both her and Aragorn. You felt yourself blushing as you looked at her. You’d only seen her fight, really fight, once. That was during Thanos’ initial attack on the Asgardian vessel and she hadn’t had the time to don her armor.
Whatever was happening, someone would explain later, she was undoubtedly going into battle and you wanted a part of you to go with her. Everyone believed that Aragorn belonged to you, but you raised him together with her. He was as much her mount as he was yours.
You nudged Aragorn forward, putting some horseflesh between you and your crush, to hide the flustered look that undoubtedly crossed your face. “You should take him. He’s ready.”
Brunnhilde raised her hands and stroked Aragorn’s muzzle, breathing softly in greeting to the stallion. She gently moved Aragorn’s face to the side, putting her close to you again. “Are you sure? He’s your pegasus, he’s important to you. I can’t take him where he will be in danger.”
You nodded and cast your eyes down, so nervous that you would rather look at the ground than at her. “I love him, and we raised him together. But you’re right. He’s mine. And mine to give to whom I will, like my heart.” You wanted to giggle at the reference but no matter how silly you felt for quoting the Lord of the Rings, it was still a confession of feelings you hid for years.
Brunnhilde smiled and squeezed your hands softly before moving one hand to gently run her thumb along your jawline. “Thank you.” Slowly, gently, she moved her lips to yours in a light kiss. Despite the somewhat harsh winds of New Asgard, despite the hard work she put in everyday, her lips were soft. Too soft. Before you could enjoy the full sensation of her lips against yours, she pulled away. This wasn’t the time to stop her either.
You stepped back and watched her easily swing her legs over Aragorn’s back. She looked back at you and grinned, then looked to the Einherjar, “Asgardians! Let’s get those bastards!”
Everyone, not just the warriors, cheered as Valkyrie and the Einherjar charged through the portal to fight Thanos and his forces, to avenge their people.
~Afterward~
Together with Brunnhilde and Aragorn, you watched Thor’s new spacecraft ascend into the atmosphere.
“I asked Thor for a favor before he left.” She said when she could no longer see the craft.
“What?”
“I asked him to send word if he found more pegasi out there. Perhaps Aragorn doesn’t have to be the last of his line.”
You smiled and turned to her. “Ever thoughtful, you grace.”
“Your grace’?” She started with furrowed brows, then paused with a grin. “I suppose I am. You know. I should need a queen.”
You chuckled as she waggled her eyebrows suggestively, but accepted her kiss nonetheless.
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The first finished fanfiction I ever wrote for the “Villainous” fandom so far. It’s based on a headcanon by villainousblandheadcanons which is written as the summary below. At least up to the part about BDS.
WARNING: Contains a self-insert/OC
Genre: Humor
Rated: G
Pairing: None
Summary: Somewhere deep inside of Black Hat Manor, there lies a book full of cursed images. Photos of HORRIBLE things that no man should EVER be exposed to! At least that’s how Black Hat describes it. Naturally after hearing about this, the Dragon-Secretary Meg “BDS” Pendragon had to find it. This proves more difficult than she thought it would be though…
—–
It was said that somewhere deep in the Black Hat manor was a book of cursed, terrifying images that would drive any man insane. Even TOUCHING it would curse them for eternity! Well, good thing I, Meg “BDS/BlackDragon” Pendragon, was no man. I wasn’t even human.
As the secretary of the company, I was bound to hear about this supposedly cursed book at some point. This obviously piqued my interest and I had to find it. Why? Curiosity. Boredom. Both really.
When I asked, Demencia had admitted to looking for it as well but never was successful. I didn’t ask Flug, however, because somehow Black Hat found out everything I told that doctor. I suspected it wasn’t under intimidation tactics either…
5.0.5 could NOT be trusted with any secrets either. I learned that the hard way when I found out Black Hat had been disguised as 5.0.5 when I told him (thinking it was 5.0.5) a personal secret…and this book was something Black Hat was determined to make sound as horrible as possible, which meant he really wanted to keep it from being seen.
I looked everywhere a book could be hidden. From the vents to every corner of each room to even Black Hat’s office while he was filming in the lab with Dr. Flug. Something about an imagination remote? I didn’t ask for details.
The reason I checked there was because that was the best place to hide something he wanted kept safe. Possibly to use later on some unfortunate soul. It wasn’t in there either though, so I left the office, and just in time too. Black Hat was marching down the hall and looking annoyed. Or rather, unnerved, like he wanted to get certain images out of his head. Had he been looking at the book?
I ducked out of sight before he saw me, not sure I should even make an excuse for standing out in the hall in front of his office when he had told me he would be filming a commercial in the lab. Plus as much as I wanted to hear what happened, it would have to wait. The book was more important right now.
I waited until I heard his doors slam shut behind him and then padded quietly down the hall and away from the office. Ok…I had looked everywhere in the manor I could think of. Even the lab while Flug was getting lunch.
I had looked everywhere…everywhere Demencia would have looked. Except Black Hat’s hat. He would definitely suspect something if I even tried, and Demencia would have found it already if he had hidden the book under there.
Wait… Demencia. I had only been looking everywhere Demencia had ever been in hiding or searched. So unless the book was made up (a very real possibility), it was somewhere Demencia would never think to look.
—-
“The library!” I announced to no one really, puffing up my chest in pride. Before me were shelves upon shelves of books dating back centuries. I had always loved the library, and any time I got time off I would explore it. I was forbidden from taking any of them outside of the room though. Black Hat didn’t want to chance me hoarding them away then losing them in my room. Dragon habits.
I quickly got to work. Searching every bookcase in the huge room. I found all sorts of books, most about Black Hat’s achievements as a villain and books in different languages. There was even one with a screaming face stretched across the cover. But not what I was looking for, since it didn’t have that “forbidden book” feel.
I was about ready to give up, when I spotted a bookcase on the ground floor of the library. There was a book in the center that had a Top Hat symbol on the spine. The writing was in another language unknown to Earth. It looked like it may be Eldritch tongue…which I could read.
“WARNING: DO NOT OPEN THIS BOOK”
I pulled it from the shelf and opened it. The page I opened to said:
“I TOLD YOU NOT TO OPEN IT!”
Disappointed, I turned to put the book back, only to spot a button where the book had been, at the back of the shelf. Hm… Reaching in, I pressed the button before quickly pulling my hand back.
There was a slight rumble and the bookcase slid smoothly to the side, revealing a dark passageway. With my night vision, I made my way down it with ease and was surprised to run into no traps. Finally coming across a pedestal with what looked to be a single book resting on top of it.
I walked up to the book. It was resting on a desk and was bound in dark leather. There was a small top hat picture in the middle of the cover. Definitely Black Hat’s book, whatever it was.
I looked down at it, hesitating now. I had come this far…but if this was the book he mentioned, what if it WAS cursed? What if I went insane? Was I willing to risk my sanity for curiosity? …Yes.
I picked it up. Nothing happened. I then slowly opened it. Then blinked before staring. There were definitely pictures…but they weren’t what I would call cursed.
The pictures were of…something. A baby of some kind from the looks of it, but with grey skin and sharp, green teeth. Wait…was that BLACK HAT?!
I stared some more. They were all of Black Hat as a…a baby. A relatively normal-looking baby if you could call Black Hat normal. It was humanoid at least.
The pictures were labeled things like “Hattie’s first Halloween” (which was a picture of an almost toddler Black Hat in a pumpkin costume for kids and holding three large bags of what must be candy. But with three human kids in the background all unconscious…) and “Hattie’s First Arson” (Kid Black Hat holding a lighter and grinning up at the camera as a town behind him burned actively) and more.
This was not what I had expected… It was better! Flipping through more, there were even better pictures of my boss in his youth, doing horrible and destructive acts yet looking kind of cute doing it.
I wondered who the photographer was though. I turned to the next page. On this one there was a picture that stood out. It was little BH again, but he was being held by someone in a white dress shirt and a black button-down vest. He had tanned skin it looked like and was smiling, but the photo cut off at below his nose. Hiding his identity.
“Me and my little Hattie” was the name of the photo. My little Hattie… Wait. Was this Black Hat’s fa-
“I’ll take THAT.” A cold voice spoke from behind me before a gloved hand snatched the book from my loose grip and snapped it shut.
I spun around and looked up to see Black Hat glaring back, book held out of my reach.
“Oh hey, Black Hat.” I greeted with what I hoped was an innocent grin.
“Don’t ‘hey’ me.” He growled, “I knew you were up to something. I just can’t believe you found this blasted thing.”
“How did you know I had?”
“I followed you of course.” He rolled his visible eye, “when I saw you outside my office, I knew you must be up to something. You knew I would be in the lab, so obviously you weren’t there to see me.”
Wow…I tended to forget he was as good as me when it came to observation. Maybe better.
“And I was right.” He glared at the book in his hand in distaste, “I knew I should have hid this better. You and Demencia are the only ones that would still open this if even I told you of the horrors within.”
“Why are you hiding it anyway?” I looked at it.
“You saw the contents didn’t you?” He snapped, glaring at me again, “a feared and respected Super-Villain can’t leave something like THIS lying around.”
“Yeah…but why not just destroy it?”
“…I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“Well for one because it has a spell on it making it indestructible.” He scowled.
“And…?”
“And that is the only reason you are getting.” He growled before taking off his top hat. Revealing a bowler cap underneath. He had two hats…? Somehow that didn’t surprise me. I watched as he then dropped the book into the top hat before he put that one back on.
“Now then…if you tell anyone about what you saw in that book, ESPECIALLY Demencia, I will do unspeakable things to you. Understood?”
“Yes sir.” I smiled despite the threat, “I would never do that to THE vile and malicious Black Hat. Besides, who would believe me anyway?”
This appeased him, because he stopped glaring threateningly at me and his frown even twitched into an almost smile at the ego boost. He then straightened his hat and gestured for me to follow him back out of the passageway. I did so. Catching up to walk beside him.
“You are still going to be punished for this and going into my office without my consent you know.” He spoke again once we were past the secret door bookcase and heading to the library doors, “There is a mountain of paperwork waiting for you on your desk. You can’t stop working until it’s finished. Not even to eat or sleep.”
My smile faded. Yeah…I should have expected that.
“Yes sir…” I sighed as he cackled evilly while we walked down the hall from the library.
-End-
This was a bit of an implied relationship story. It leans more toward that or something like friendship at the end there. I started writing it when I was very tired one night, and wanted to get the idea out in writing. Then went back to revise, edit, and change the character to BDS from my OC, Shardie,as well as change the point of view.
In the future I will be posting more information on how BDS came to work in Black Hat’s manor and what her role would be.
#villainous#villainos#fanfiction#OC#Self-Insert#BDS#Dr Flug#Demencia#5.0.5#Never actually show up#but are mentioned#Black Hat#BH#Appears at the end#and briefly in the beginning#based on a headcanon for villainous#BlackDragon Writing#tried posting this in text form#passed the word count limit
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Lost Angel, Found
I live in LA because I don't lie to myself
You read that and think
What is she talking about?
I live in LA because it forces humility
Anywhere you move from
Is nothing
Compared to this city
In size, in sprawl
It draws
In droves
People from all over
For different reasons
Although the trope
Is someone with false hopes
Of "making it big"
The disillusionment
The pursuit of "the dream"
Affords
Makes you able to feel your way through the world
Because you know
In a sea of people
You're totally alone
LA is a hard city
New York might seem harder,
But they always think they supersede us
Regardless of the category
LA is not
Soft
And the soft that come
Compress under pressure
And harden
Into diamonds:
Physically stunning
Cold
Indestructible
You become able to cut through
Bullshit
Relying only on your intuition
Because everyone will say
The same things to you
They'll tell you
They can make you famous
They'll tell you anything
To get their way
Or to have their way with you
They'll talk to you about how they once knew Kerouac
At a club on Sunset
Once you tell them you're
A writer
And assume you'll go home with them
And be flabbergasted
When you leave before midnight, shaking their hand
This was me at Hyde
With Johnny Depp
Last December--
Swear on my life,
Ask Danielle
In LA, you can trust no one
But that forces you to trust yourself
To trust your gut
You'll learn spot a liar
From a freeway's width away
And you'll learn
To lie right back to them
Strategically
Keeping conflict at bay
Like a seamless
Lane change
In a blink
You float away
Not signaling
To have an ego in LA
Is to fail to learn
The special lessons it can give you
To think you're special
Is one thing
To speak it
Is the failure
You are one of very many people
Who think they're very special
And so bumbling through a party
In the Hollywood Hills
Feels like acid tripping through a funhouse
You see a girl with a face like yours
But with some distortion
Her "tits" are bigger and her waist is smaller
But you wonder if she's real
Or if she's you, through a warped mirror
You hear an artist say
"I've been taking a break
To focus on me"
"The creative process takes time, you dig?"
Justifying their lazy
In a cycle of OCD
Snorting like a pig
Cocaine, greedily
Laughing, commiserating
But you wonder if that voice that speaks
Is truly emanating
From your own brain
Because, boy
Do they sound the same
I live in LA
Because it's humanizing
Because there is no reference point for self-comparison
There is no community
So there is no number one
There is no queen bee
Or hierarchy
Maybe the Kardashians
Or the Hadids
Would seem to be
Who everyone tries to be
But LA is too big for that to be
True
Or universally agreed
It's too big
To define
It's too spread out
To draw lines around
There is no "belonging"
There is no "in crowd"
No consensus
Only freedom
But for most
This kind of freedom isn't liberating
It's disorienting
Most people
Would choose to be the
Big fish in the little pond
Because everything is clearer when you know everyone
These people are afraid
To swim with the sharks
Because they know the blood
That seeps out of their veins
Clouds the clear water
Discombobulates
And puts them at risk
But not them, truly
Their concept of identity
When you rid yourself of the reference point
You're swimming in a school of fish
Adjacent to you
Who you resemble
And share with
But have never met
This is the 10
Or the 405, better yet
Next time you're in traffic
Count the number of people
Who sit alone in their Priuses
Like the opening sequence
Of the film that lost best picture
But thought it won
These are the souls
Who you float through this place with
This fucking weird place
That you can't make a home out of
Other than
Within yourself
Nomadic
You become
LA is change and rapidity
It's Instagram and Snapchat
It's hyper-connectivity
Within a fragmented
Inherently disconnected system
The metro they're building
Is something you have to smirk at:
An innocent attempt
To unite something disparate
As if people would share
When they could sit in their own car
In the hot air
They complain about traffic
But they don't really care
Cause they know they'll be late
And they're not really
Going anywhere
Anyway
Everyone wakes up at noon on weekends
And it's not weird to
Everyone feels the same gloom
But won't speak about it
And it's not a true sadness
It's a pseudo-loneliness
That comes from resisting
The reality that this place gives
You have to embrace it
Or you'll get eaten
You have to keep swimming
Or you'll stay in your reef
Watching everyone
Race away in the tide
The mustang whirring down the street
You don't know where you're going
And you don't really care
Because at lease you're moving
And you're going somewhere
It might be fake
But at least it's not Vegas
It might be too big
But at least it's not tiny
Anonymity is freeing
And here is the irony:
Here is a city full of people
Who just want to be
Seen
Who want to feel
Like their life has meaning
In the eyes of other people
But in the process of attempting
To get what they want
They choose to let go of
The very thing that allows them
Mobility:
Anonymity
Here are all these fame-seeking
Dream-chasing
Lotus-eating
People
Who don't realize
That there is no end
To this feeling of loneliness
That seems to plague their experience
Angelenos run marathons
Chasing the things that they want
Even if it's the love
They could never have
The run,
The marathon
Is what keeps you
From wanting to off yourself
Los Angeles is a microcosmic representation of the human experience on the planet
The existential angst you can experience here is unparalleled
The futility and relative insignificance of your existence
Is reminded to you
By the words people speak
The billboards and the hyper-mediation
Of people
Who were once just like you
You realize that the “important people”
Aren't any more important
Than you
You're racing toward nothing
But what else can you do?
When you move to the City of Angels,
You wake up
And for the first time
You forget who you are
Are you the hot girl at the bar?
There are twelve of you.
Are you the genius at your school?
It's full of the best and brightest youth
Whether you're a Trojan a Bruin
Or you go to CalTech
Who you sit next to
Worked just as hard
As you did
Sweet baby Angelenos, now
Don't let the Santa Ana’s get you down
There's no way that you'll woo the whole crowd
But the ones you do
Cherish them
Don't let yourself be deluded
By the illusion
Don't lose yourself in the labyrinth that is
The funhouse
I promise it doesn't get better than this
Because if you can live in Los Angeles
You will understand
Firsthand
That this is how life is
--Foxwood
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My Analysis (ramblings) about TLD-Brief mentions of the other episode that shall not be named
John had a dangerous and exciting super intelligent wife.
John had a beautiful little baby girl
John had his strong bond and friendship with Sherlock.
John had the cases and the danger in his life.
The three of them were a solid unit who worked and practically lived together at times……and yet…..
‘I want more and I still do!’
What could he have possibly wanted more of?He had everything.He had his cake and he was eating it.So why wasn’t it satisfying him?
Then get the hell on with it John Watson!
Let’s completely jumble THAT scene up a bit….
John tells Mary he cheated on her emotionally.
He wants to be a good man and he wanted more than he had….he still does…I.e this is telling us that he is emotionally connected to someone else.This is why he is guilty and why his actions are killing him.
John starts ranting to Sherlock about taking your chance with love because it’s gone before you know it.This can’t be about Mary.It can’t be about her because he says that he wanted more and still does.He had her fully.
it's even more interesting when you think about the fact that Sherlock's sister is the one to convince John that he wants more than his current married situation is providing.He obviously didn't want Sherlock's sister because there was not one call back...taunt or mention in TFP in regards to their little texting sessions together.If John had connected with her emotionally then she would have exploited that to wind Sherlock up.So that comment was def not about her. Whose wife smiles at them when they tell them that they just weren’t good enough for them?Whose wife tells them to, 'get the hell on with it’, after finding out that ’ something more’ involves another person.The same wife who John now realises at this point, absolutely realises, knew where his heart truly lay.In fact this whole episode was about John ( through Mary) accepting what Sherlock was to him.The Lying Detective was John.He had been lying to himself.How does John come to that realisation?Two ways.
1) Mary sacrifices herself to protect Sherlock
She knows that John can live without her but absolutely cannot live without Sherlock or lose him again.She knows that Sherlock is everything to John and that she comes second.She has grew to accept that through her time with them.Previously she was selfish and would have killed Sherlock or let him die, not now…. Now she likes him….she loves John…emotional context makes your choices more reckless…
She finally loves John in the same way Sherlock loves John .She did something selfless and pure for the man so that he wouldn’t lose the one thing that mattered the most to him.This is exactly what Sherlock did at the end of HLV.
When John sees that DVD and hears Mary saying 'the man we both love’, he knows, that she knows the very thing he thought could be repressed ( the depth of his love of Sherlock and Sherlock’s love of him). That’s why he is so emotional during that scene.His soul has been exposed.Sherlock’s soul has been exposed.She is calling them both out on it at this point.She is telling Sherlock that he is the only person who can save John Watson.He is the only one that matters to John ( mirror to Mrs Hudson).He is john’s 'something more’….not her…..and he always will be.
That’s how John can finally say to Sherlock that he wasn’t responsible for Mary’s death.He knows at this point that what happened in that aquarium happened because she understood and fully accepted the importance and significance of this deep emotional connection that these two men find themselves having.
He now knows that Sherlock was powerless to stop her making that decision.
It’s why John was brave and spoke his feelings out loud to both Mary and Sherlock.
The text from the woman ( just a text) was the catalyst for the emotions bubbling under the surface, to suddenly erupt.
Why?The last time John dealt with the woman she told him something important.Something he was told and did not listen to.Something at this point triggers him to remember as he finally snaps.
Him and Sherlock were a couple.
I think John likes you more than me.
I am….yet look at us both…
Someone loves you…
2) Get the hell on with it I.e make him wear the hat..
Mary is smiling at John because he has accepted who he really is now.Who he wants to be.What he wants to be is by Sherlock’s side.it’s him smiling at himself because he has finally accepted it.It’s him anticipating Mary’s actions and her responses to him if he had admitted his inner and true feelings to his wife whilst she was still alive.He is one half of a crime fighting duo.He is one half of a whole heart.Sherlock being the other half.No it’s not made sexual at the end up, but it’s a deep deep and fulfilling love.Everything else and everyone else is always highlighted to be a distraction or not fulfilling enough.it’s all just texting….it doesn’t meet their needs and it can’t meet their needs.Only their reliance on each other can do that.
Get the hell on with it is a very strong signal for John to stop fighting this strange ( to him) relationship they have and just embrace it for what it is.Sherlock embraced this realisation in TAB.This episode was about John doing the same.
It’s always the two of them against the rest of the world.
They are a couple but not in the conventional sense.They have everything they need to fulfil them when they are by one another’s side.Three Continents Watson is now happy to be a 'confirmed bachelor’ and to simply be by Sherlock’s side.They complete each other. They are each other’s 'something more’.They both had to go through hell in the first two episodes of this series to fully realise that.They’ve been going through hell since series one to realise that together they are an indestructible unit.The hug is their acceptance of this.They are not perturbed by these deep feelings they have for each other anymore.they have finally learned to embrace it and to define it in their own way…
It is what it is….
When I’m not there I know what you two could become….
John smiles because it’s more confirmation for him that Mary understood his and Sherlock’s complex relationship.
The DVD says 'Miss you’ and at this point I think John knows it’s not a DVD from Euras or dead Moriarty.I think he knew it was Mary and I think he wanted Sherlock to be there when they watched it because he knew whatever she would say would be about both of them and their relationship.
It’s why they are standing/sitting so far apart.They are nervous.Rightly so.The last DVD pretty much helped with the realisation that they were soulmates.They must have been terrified about what she would reveal this time regarding their feelings.Quite right as well….considering this DVD was clearly the catalyst for John ditching his flat and moving back in with Sherlock…
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