#in an abstract kinda way
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Again thinking about how the song 'Me and Mr wolf' by The Real Tuesday Weld is low-key hannigram coded (these lyrics esp remind me of the brainsaw/cliff scenes):
If - I - taste - you - will - we - know
If - love - kills
Or - makes - you - whole
Tears - you - open - takes - you - home
You have the thing I love
But the need in me is way too much
If I open wide
One of us will get lost inside,
Me
Or you
One of us is going to
Need
To
Die
I have the thing
The thing
You love
You die
#the whole song is very them tho#in an abstract kinda way#though metaphors are the foundarion their relarionship so ya know 🤷♀️#Fr though the song is amazing and yall should check it out#ive always loved media that correlates hunger/cannibalism with love#theres just something about a love thats so consuming that it devours#love thats teeth against teeth#mouths swallowing mouths#taking away the ability to eat anything but the other#a love thats terminal from the onset#a love so great it outlasts the lovers#a different kind of consummation#or something like that idk#ive got to stop doing tangents in the tags#sorry yall#hannibal#nbc hannibal#hannibal nbc#netflix#hannibal netflix#will graham#hannibal lecter#hannigram#murder husbands#renew hannibal#revive hannibal#songs#me and mr wolf#the real tuesday weld
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i think a lot about hot sauce and jeannemary. two young girls so ready to kill and to die. a comparison made all the worse when you recall that hot sauce lost all her family to the cohort, that she can specifically recall fourth style necromancy (using corpses as bombs). a fourteen and thirteen year old that could easily have been on opposite sides of the same front line.
#the locked tomb#the loss of childhood! senseless violence!#opposite ends of the propaganda machine#eskildit posts tlt#all of nona the ninth#how am i supposed to tag hot sauce#jeannemary chatur#ok to rb#edit: okay im actually gonna use these tags to ramble a lil#in many ways i feel alecto the ninth is gonna be the hardest book to actually pull off#first for the obvious reason that its an ending and endings are always hard#but second because nona the ninth was by far the most political book of the series#books 1 and 2 following harrow and gideon mean we're following characters on the outskirts of the empire#gideon is individually oppressed by the ninth and even harrow is considered a black sheep outsider of the nine houses#but they are still WITHIN the houses gideon has dreams of the cohort harrow has dreams of of revitalizing her house#nona was our actual introduction to the real consequences of the empire that characters like judith like jeannemary like corona herself#have their livelihoods and status entirely built on the imperial violence we see first hand on new rho#anyway i say all of this to say it means coming back to these characters might be kinda tricky!#the cost of the empire is no longer abstract its extremely palpable!#how does one return to our core cast we've know for multiple books now that we understand that#idk. interested to see where we go!
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no one would notice if i ever vanished // if bodies could sustain // this never-ending army // like blood pumping through a vein
(click for better resolution!)
:OOO hello. anyway since these are all posters i'd have in an ideal world or smth and i'd like to store the high res versions somewhere,,, here's the google drive folder for them? hehe ''
close up!
#adamandi#vincent aurelius lin#i'm back with the posters! or smth! idk!!#i'm maybe just a bit obsessed with vincent. such a Character.#where can i run is sustaining me single-handedly through this exam season (<- has cried thrice in the last two days; alas; but moving on)#my stress response was that in a fit of apathy i shut myself down from academia and stopped to paint this#six hours total? on this funky little thing! had to push myself to finish the magnifying glass but!! looks so cool. i'm impressed with my e#fun fact: all the shades are hand-coloured. aka everything is digitally hand painted hooray!! i havent painted for a long time (ish)#smth about this musical makes me want to paint. it's very lovely that way#it's also a miracle i haven't gotten carpal tunnel or any wrist injuries so far... i'm a lucky person! hooray#i had so many thoughts to ramble about and now i don't recall any of them.#-! about this piece: inspired specifically by that one line that i doodled in the margins of a math practice last night#the diagonal slant was very. thinky. the rendering and angle were kinda contradictory to do but it's fineeee (draft was diff. pov)#i liked the red abstraction. and the way that people (misc) gave same vibes as red blood cells.#green for vincent because contrasting colour!! considered a spotlight that was more obv bc. again theatre lighting is so cool. but that was#a bit too literal? i think. so just fun little highlights. no one look at the accuracy of anything here though.. shadows do Not do this#also like hehehe lin. forest. forest of people. i really liked thinking about that. hehehe#i didn't know the font to use!! or quote!! so i slapped on the name of the musical and called it a day... the blank one is in the google-#-folder if you want to add your own stuff :') also also i wasn't sure about cropping at all. so again high res in google drive link#which is under the keep-reading sign! kind of a choose your own adventure because i'm lazy :3#ajhshdhfhfhfhf i think i've been fuelled by the tags under each post so far. so intensely. so very nice.#also when the cast or creators drop fun facts... serotonin right there.. they're all so nice waaagh it's so cool that they like my stuff ><#<laughs> really grateful that the whole fandom's so sweet <3 thank you for your support TvT#alright!! off to mess about with chemistry. jiayou me.#oh yes. a post script about the cropping crisis: i wasn't sure how small i wanted to make him. in proportion to the crowd. so if you see it#on mobile ig it's tiny and on laptop it kind of makes sense ...
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old no-flash au sketches
#lisa the painful#lisa rpg#brad armstrong#buddy armstrong#lisa armstrong#trying to post some things here#buddy is just a kid who really like old school bands bc brad always listened with her when she was little#lisa is the cool aunt that make some abstract pieces of art and stuff#brad still being kinda pathetic but not in a apocalyptic way#my art
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She just wanted a friend :(
#the amazing digital circus#tadc#pomni#gummigoo#tadc spoilers#the amazing digital circus spoilers#josh art tag#okay but this ep was really interesting in the subtle ways it showed that pomni didnt think of the others as friends#like i suppose it shouldve been obvious#but i think myself and many other members of the fandom knew from the pilot that they would end up friends and we realized the potential#and then combined with the time between eps#i kinda forgot that they werent really friends#pomni actually spent most of the pilot separated from them in exit maze hell#and was Going Thru It the rest of the time#but this eps pomni dynamics with the rest were super interesting#esp how she wasnt really receptive to ragathas friendliness#and then the ending!! how a funeral of all things gave her comfort and hope!#i think that showed her that these truly are real people#not just like part of this weird digitap hell like caine#and that even if she abstracts she will be remembered#and people will be sad about what happened to her and mourn her#the scene of everyones (minus jax's) hands grabbing her as she falls makes me so emotional 🥺
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If you had to pick.
What are you top 5 kinks?
eooo
1.) enf
2
why is that 2 so big
2.) excessive cum
3.) why the fuck do these numbers keep being really big when i type them initially but then go back to normal when i type anything else
3.) pretty light bondage
4.) human x anthro
5.) i dont know if there's a single term for it but whenever characters have like, nigh uncontrollably high libido esp with mixed with any of the above like jus bein on the brink of cumming really hard or that but they're also tied down so they cant. that, whatever that's called
#kinda in no specific order#because i dont actually have a whole lotta quote unquote kinks#most of my stuff is just preference or sorta abstract preference#like the aforementioned libido thing#or like really specific character types (of both body and attitude) in specific positions and such#like big bara man character who is stern and reserved and very gay but also a really bottom-y size queen? hell yeah#but thats not really a kink nor is there just a singular term for that most of the time#or like rico and olympia where olympia is a very recently uncloseted gay guy who is sorta forging his sexuality#while rico is a very sexually experienced transguy who hasnt really gone thru any sorta bodily changes#SHRUG#real specific shit like that but not broadly specific in the kink way
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hey you know how basically the whole GFFA is a number of space wizards of varying moralities battlegrounds? and how like, irl, in ex-battlegrounds we find both like, live munitions, but also ones which are still around bc they were DOA?
and how sometimes (weirdly often) the dead/presumed dead bombs(/mines/etc) become kinda... decorative art or at least weird bits of the landscape?
point I'm getting at here is how many people in the GFFA have like, A Weird Stone or whatever that is actually an untriggered or mildly broken Sith Nightmare Machine (etc) sitting in their fucking yard, or the local park is actually 2/3rds of a ritual circle of 'kill everyone on the planet with spikes'.
#star wars#look all im saying is that skeevy sheev could have been way less suspicious with his sith art history collection#by just being like I THOUGHT THE COLOURS IN THIS ABSTRACT ART WERE COOL#WHAT DO YOU MEEEAN ITS A RITUAL SCROLL OF KILL JEDI TO DEATH WITH FIRE#etc. 'this weird lumpy rock reminds me if home :)'#takes him from kinda weird edgy hobby to force null affable idiot with bad luck#(also hi i live! i am army crawling my way to a month's holiday before I start a new job :)#which pays way more than my current one and will hopefully be less of a tirefire#or at least a more interesting one.)
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sometimes I think about how Caine is canonically oblivious to the suffering that the humans trapped in the circus go through. Makes me wonder if he even understand the suffering if someone explained it to him because he’s just an AI, a robot with no soul and no understanding of how complex being human can be
#the amazing digital circus#hi tadc fandom as you can see I’m invested in how Caine is unaware of the suffering everyone goes through despite it being so obvious that-#Everyone wants to go home and to their human lives#does he understand why abstraction happens. He knows about it but does he know that the humans that have become abstracted have basically-#lost their minds because of the circus#and in the pilot he was making a fake exit for everyone and it makes me wonder a lot#the way he reacted when Pomni asked how to leave + him trying to make an exit but not finishing it becuz he supposedly didn’t know what-#to put on the other side on it. I kinda think he’s genuinely clueless on why everyone wants to leave so badly and just wants everyone to-#have fun at the circus but he’s a robot he doesn’t get it he’s confused but definitely trying his best to fulfill the constant request of-#an exit#Are you reading this? If you are. Hi.#How many tags does this have oh my god#anyways. Caine is canonically clueless on why everyone wants to go + oblivious to the pain. I think he’s genuinely unable to understand due#to being an AI but I could definitely be wrong since only the pilot is out so far#if I’m actually right then holy shit idk what I’ll do#danny speaks
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Full extra long page of the Pantheon reveal from last weeks Broken Pantheon update
#webcomics#webtoons#broken pantheon#i never use the webtoon long page format cuz i prefer it but i felt this was the best way to show off the pantheon#in a kinda abstract collage way so u get the Vibes
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Anyway I think maybe I've wandered off into the weeds here thanks to my own immense frustration/morbid fascination with a certain sort of narrative. And I think maybe it's all too easy to wander into the weeds when what you're talking about is this very solipsistic style of superficially-critical storytelling, which is uneasy about imperialism only insofar as it threatens to harm imperialists or imperialistic societies. Which - if not already intended that way to begin with! - is certainly incredibly easy to co-opt into the service and defense of empire (Doing An Imperialism Made Our Soldiers Sad -> therefore you must uncritically valorize them, because condemnation of imperialism adds to their suffering you monster). It's hard to talk about without feeling like you're falling into a similar trap of being endlessly curious about the inner lives of imperialists - even if that curiosity takes the form of "wanting to put their fucked up psychology under a microscope" - at the expense of focusing on their victims.
But at the same time I do think that a complete critique of imperialism mentions (as Césaire does) the way it tends to rot the people and societies that practice it from within. And I do find it fascinating that amidst all the contorted cognitive dissonance of Conrad et al, they still express something along those lines. And this is only one of the many reasons that Discourse On Colonialism lives in my head rent-free
#lit tag#imperialism#no more war#cultures of dissociation#aimé césaire#imperial violence always comes home#i did not even get here from 19thc lit but via the undeath-as-metaphor thing i keep rotating in my brain#but i will not drag you all through those neurological connections too lest i really tip off into indefensible abstraction#the point is my brain keeps finding its way to césaire from kinda unlikely starting points#my posts
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[Image ID in ALT Text]
We’ve had a few art nights at youth group, and here are my four latest pieces. I think it’s a possibility that one could interpret something from the colour scheme. I don’t know, though, I’m not sure. What do you think?
#the first one is from early 2022 when i was questioning my sexuality#kinda like. thinking ‘yeah i’m bi’ but not fully?? idk it was complicated#no one said anything by the way#it’s Abstract#(i painted blue. i painted pink. they came together. i went Oh. Could This Mean Something. it did.)#in fairness: i did orientate it horizontally instead of vertically but like#if i tried that shit as a leader with the current youth they would clock me so hard#but FUCKING-#THE OUT OF PROPORTION BI FLAG TEAM#THE BI COLOURING#the first three are bi in colour scheme the fourth is bi (bee) in principle#bi bi bi bee - bi-thoven’s 5th
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some modern art pieces are just artefacts of the distortion...
#i don't mean this in a negative way I think a lot of abstract art is cool as fuck#TMA#the distortion#the magnus archives#my post#uni blogging (kinda)
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jeez i knew oppenheimer probably wouldn't be a very balanced image of the dropping of the atomic bomb but I didn't think they'd just straight up not show a single japanese person the entire film
#idk if that was purposefully meant to be an indictment of the american people or not. kinda doubt it.#i think its a good movie when it comes to oppenheimer as a man. but man it leaves out a lot about the manhattan project#like just completely overlooks the american perception of japan that led to it including propaganda efforts#from both japan and the us#also the way american media reacted to the bomb#before fullscale erasure attempts really took hold#i mean for fucks sake the maidens of hiroshima were on a game show#youd think thatd be worth mentioning#but i guess ultimately bc its a biopic its about One Guy not the overall ideology that leads to war crimes#certainly not the worst thing the US could've put out about the atomic bomb but ultimately of less substance that id hoped i guess#i would've liked to see more of the courtroom drama side of things OR a very abstracted view of atomic theory too#just not... both at once. clashed a little for me#idk. godzilla was way better than this
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when people first meet me and inquire about my studies im generally hit with two different responses, being 1) “wow, that’s an unusual combination”/“you don’t see that often”/etc. and 2) “you must be SO smart!” (or its evil twin, “you must hate yourself ha-ha”), and while the first is obviously a better response than the second, both are kinda…awkward to react to.
like? IS it an unusual combination of interests, or is it actually that most institutions make it exceptionally difficult for people to pursue stem and arts concurrently? and that we don’t often talk about the heavy crossover between stem and the arts because we’re so culturally obsessed with this notion that the world is split into Art People and Science People (also known as English People and Math People)?
and how would my interest in a science make me any smarter than someone in my program who chose to pursue a minor in history instead of physics? also, NO, i don’t hate myself. obviously taking stem classes after spending years believing im “not a math person” has lowered my gpa, but that’s not really something i care about, because at the end of the day i find the subject endlessly fascinating and i enjoy my classes very much, and i get better at math every semester because i have no choice. because it’s just…a method of communication. it’s a language. you practice, you improve - but you have to be consistent and intentional about it. the same way you have to be consistent and intentional about analyzing fictional texts and historical documents.
which is to say that like. you are using the same skills. i tutored a high school student last year who looked at me like i was crazy for saying that close reading a short story is functionally the same as solving an algebra problem. you collect like terms. then you compare and contrast them to make a statement about them - it’s human nature to seek refuge in what is familiar even if it is simultaneously traumatic, or x = 2 and y = -2. you can chart it, you can graph it, you can draw it. listen, isn’t there something so inherently beautiful about the word integral? it’s something intrinsic, baked into a person or a thing - the fundamental values formed within you by tiny, infinitesimal pieces: moments, experiences - they coalesce into something completely different, but still. you can go back. you can find the pieces. define them, pick them apart, put them together again in new ways. expand them, contract them, equate them to something else just to understand them.
half the study of mathematics is called analysis, for god’s sake. what is the study of art if not analysis? is it not the goal of the artist, the writer, to make sense of our place in the world? and is this not what we do in physics, too? look at the world and try to find reason in it? as the poet spends their life trying to make the intangible tangible, the particle physicist attempts to study dark matter. when we form a sentence, we utilize a complex system of equations that are so second-nature to us we don’t even register that’s what we’re doing - but there’s a reason this branch of linguistics is called syntactic calculus.
like…believe me. if you told my teenage self i’d be taking calculus-based courses in university, i wouldn’t have believed it. i teach high school students now who tell me they know they aren’t good at english, but it doesn’t matter to them because they do so well in math. and i get it. i do. but it’s disappointing, too, because i think my knowledge of math has made me a better reader and writer. and it feels like most people are missing out on that connection, because they feel like it’s impossible to make. but any experimentalist can tell you there’s an art to the scientific process. any musician or poet can tell you that great art is dictated by numbers - rhythm, rhyme and metre, all of it. the only group of people as interested in conceptual symmetry as physicists are artists.
anyway, all i’m saying is like - one is not more essential than the other, these things are inextricably linked, these things are as fundamental to human existence as breathing. there’s a reason why astronomers defer to shakespeare to name newly discovered bodies in space, you know? we've all gotta learn to love the math in our art and the artistry behind math.
#taylor.txt#anyway i have some profs this semester who really made me feel idk. vindicated in a way#like i get this so often you know? i get Looks i get 'you're crazy' and 'what's wrong with you' (in jest granted but still) ALL the time#so having a professor straight-up say that science is an art? validating!!!!#i think english and physics are extremely compatible subjects because they have a similar goal in a way you know?#and im not a good artist but nothing helped me understand HOW i can be better at drawing than calculus#i never knew how to draw a sphere until i had to put one on a graph of a 3d function yknow? and looking at the numbers that govern it#just made me Understand how it's Supposed To Be. and i think thats kinda cool?#also like. again. LINGUISTICS#and dont think this is like. in any way against the ideas of abstraction and subversion and whatnot in art#chaos right? antimatter? the entire study of quantum mechanics? there are so many parallels to draw#obviously nothing is a 1:1 but i just. art is science science is art and its so fuckin COOL
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man does anyone actually know how to pick a fursona. there are too many animals to choose from
#and stuff like “choose based on vibes” or “aesthetic” or “which one fits your personality” dont work for me. im not the type of person who#can easily choose based on intuition and personal opinion#i like to think i think more mechanically than others which is why i'm so... stiff?? is that the right word?#and besides i know way too much about animals to know none of them would actually fit my personality#whatever that is#tldr i sont think i have a clear enough image of myself or animals to choose a fursona that would best fit me.#every animal is unique and none of them will ever be an exact 1 to 1 version of myself#do you see my issue here do you understand that i think weirder and differenter than other people#man im kinda jealous of other people who know right away that theyre a dog or a fox just because it “seems cool” or other abstract reasons#rant over i guess
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I think if the live action series does get more seasons they should go up to the end of alabasta and then stop. It would make sense and wrap up a complete story nicely, and could be done in couple more seasons so the show wouldn’t feel ‘unfinished’ when Netflix inevitably cuts it off 🙄
It would also be enticing to new fans (who’ve only watched the live action) if the show ended with them sailing off from alabasta. Like ‘oh boy the strawhats made it to the grand line and had their first big victory! where will they possibly go next???’ And if people want more they’ll go to the anime/manga
#just kinda rambling here#I just think it would be a good concrete goal for the series vs the abstract ‘we’ll just keep going until whenever!!!’#which. we all know there’s no way ALL of one piece will be adapted to live action#it’s also a goal that could realistically be done before the actors get too old and the sfx too complicated#one piece live action#croc would make a good final villain too#plus also having robin as another good antagonist only to be revealed as secretly helping the strawhats? good shit
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