#im so used to being the second choice so alas i keep projecting | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

warmau · 3 years

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how you end up here, you don’t know, but you blame johnny suh because when things get weird it’s usually his fault anyway

johnny’s smile is a thousand and one watts - he reaches out to pass you the beat up guitar case and again, you don’t even take it by choice, it’s nudged into your hands before you can really even say a word

“im not joining your band.”

“it’s not mine - it’s ours.”

jungwoo twirls a drum stick between his fingers and grins from his spot on the garage couch

“no johnny - we all know it’s yours.”

your lips thin and the only reason you don’t fling the case to the floor is because you actually like the guitar that’s inside.

granted you haven’t seen it since middle school and it probably still has that horrible sticker on the back of it that you remember picking at until all the little pieces you got off were uncomfortably stuck under your nails.

“guys - it’s summer. we have nothing better to do.”

“says you, i got an engineering internship at samsung.”

jungwoo chirps again and you try not to roll your eyes

we all know about the damn samsung internship dude.

“yeah - and i have to work at the family bookstore.”

mark lee walks in, holding as many redbulls as he can fit between his elbows, they spill out and onto the space beside jungwoo

you listen to mark open one and johnny groan

“ok you all have something to do, but we-” he motions behind him at you “don’t have anything to save us from the boredom that is about to take up two months of our youthful lives!”

“hey-”

you cut in and all three sets of eyes focus on you

“i have something i want to do this summer.”

johnny’s long figure straightens in anticipation while jungwoo cocks an eyebrow and mark gives you an encouraging smile

“im not going to tell you what it is, but it’s definitely not starting a band with you guys.”

you lean the guitar case against a nearby wall and add a half-hearted shrug

“sorry.”

the walk from johnny’s house to yours isn’t long, it takes about fifteen minutes if you’re really going slow.

plus you’ve done it so many times, you basically set your body to autopilot.

you think about it - the thing you want to do this summer before you go away for university and home becomes a new place and a memory at the same time.

you’re not known for being sentimental, johnny has even gone so far as to label you as a bit ‘apathetic’ . but still you know this is your last chance to really enjoy the place you grew up in.

you turn the corner at the street that leads down to where you live and in the hot evening air you hear something

it’s the sound of a bike, the pedaling is light but the frame must be old because it creaks a little when it slows down slightly to maneuver to the left and pass you.

you look up and see a boy

brown hair still wet from the pool or a shower maybe, dimples at the corners of his smile, the two sizes too big white shirt fluttering behind him in the breeze

for what seems like longer than a second - you lock eyes - his match the color of autumn leaves and teddy bear fur

and for some weird reason can’t stop thinking about them even well after you get back home

is he new in town? i’ve never seen him before?

finally managing to shake off the curiosity, you fish the shoebox you’ve been keeping under your bed out and open it.

inside there’s only three things so far:

a copy of your graduation photo, a copy of johnny’s graduation photo, and the prom invite ticket that has jungwoo’s chicken scrawl on the back (he was technically your date, because johnny got proportioned by half the seniors and mark was too nervous to ask if you’d take him)

this is what you were talking about. this is what you want to spend summer doing.

you want to spend it remembering, gathering fragments of your life so far in your hometown with your bestfriends, so that when you move on you have a tangible piece of the memories

the reason you were keeping it a secret though was because.....even you had to admit.......this was a little much

and you had built yourself a little bit of a hard shell so imagining telling the people you knew that this was your summer plan

well, you could already hear johnny’s voice saying something like ‘hey, this isn’t a hallmark movie you sap and facetime exists. do you think im not gonna call you at 3 am from across the country like i do now anyway?’

you close the box and tap your fingers on the top.

tomorrow, i’ll start visiting all the important places.

your phone pings and it sound echoes through the otherwise empty library.

a harsh shushing sound comes from the front desk and you quickly answer it, sliding down against one of the bookcases

you’d come here to see if you could find that old series you loved as a kid, the magic treehouse, it’s the books you and johnny fought over when you first met each other years ago

you abandon that though because poor mark sounds like he’s having a panic attack over the phone

“hey, you need to get over here - johnny is holding auditions for a guitarist since you said you didn’t want to do the band”

“ok, so what? it’s just auditions?”

mark’s pleading gets louder, “it’s auditions with JOHNNY - he thinks this is eurovision or something i don’t know please i can’t reign him in and jungwoo’s at his internship - i am dying here!”

you sigh, making it long so mark knows how annoyed you are

“put him on.”

mark’s voice drowns and johnny takes the phone from him

“what did i say with conspiring with them? we are shunning them for quitting on the band! what do you mean you had no other options? what do you mean my egomania is coming out? - anyway hey whats up?”

“stop torturing mark and all the poor kids that showed up to audition.”

“first of all, im not torturing anyone. that would be illegal and distasteful, im just giving my constructive criticism. second of all, if you want to give orders like that then let’s make this a fare trade off. come over and help me judge - i mean hold the auditions and then i will cease my so called ‘torturing’ ala my ‘criticizing’.”

you huff - fine, it’s one day out of the whole summer.

“ok. but you better have snacks.”

“do you think i wouldn’t provide refreshments? what kind of monster do you think i am?”

there’s more people than you expect showing up to audition for this band. half of them are just there to sweet talk johnny or mark, but the others are all just. bad.

you never knew how bad someone butcher playing an instrument, let alone a guitar, but you’ve had that eye opening experience today

“how many people left?”

you mutter, face first into your palms and looking up with happiness when mark says only one!

“hey, im jung jaehyun.”

you turn and see the boy from the bike, the one with the softest eyes you’ve ever seen, standing in the entry to johnny’s garage

he’s carrying his own guitar case - black leather and well worn but loved

“well jaehyun dude, i hope you can at least play the damn thing because i feel like no one in this town can!”

johnny groans and you straighten up a little as jaehyun comes closer

he sets himself up and you feel something inside your stomach turn when he bends down and you see a bit of the tanned skin of his back

“im not amazing, but i can play some of the classics.”

“wonderwall?” mark asks and johnny snips at him as you try to think of something to say, but suddenly....your brain is fuzzy

“play anything!”

so jaehyun does, he plays, and he even sings and the fuzziness in your brain turns to white noise and the little drop in your stomach is a whole bundle of butterflies

you barely realize the johnny is already befriending jaehyun and mark is staring at him with those big, impressed eyes

when you get up and jaehyun smiles at you

“so what do you play?”

johnny throws an arm around your shoulder older brother style and rolls his eyes before you get a word in

“you’re actually taking their spot because they’re too busy to be in the band.”

something seems to cast a sad shadow over jaehyun’s features - “oh, you’re not going to play with us?”

words float through your head, none of which you can grasp onto, so you just shake it instead and let johnny ramble on about your so called betrayal

you look at your phone and of course it’s nearing ten and there’s no way you can go to any of the other places on your list so you motion to mark that you’re going to head home

“oh - i have to go too.”

jaehyun slings his guitar case over his shoulder, “but ill come by tomorrow for practice?”

johnny shoots him a big grin and then haggles all the social media jaehyun has out of him

you don’t know why you just don’t start walking - but somehow you end up leaving with jaehyun, making that left turn where you first passed each other

“do you live on this street?”

you jump a little as you nod, “yeah - i think i actually saw you yesterday. you were on your bike so you probably didn’t notice me.”

there’s a polite distance between you two, but jaehyun is smiling when he answers

“oh no, i definitely noticed you.”

you end up thinking about those words the same way you couldn’t stop thinking about his eyes

except this time, instead of it lasting a day, the thought lasts nearly two and a half weeks

it seems jaehyun is doing a good job fitting in with your friends, considering you don’t get anymore calls from mark

and you actually start to make progress on your summer project

you manage to get some ticket stubs from old movies, an old science project you did that’s still hanging on the walls of the highschool (open for summer classes), and pressed flowers from ontop of a hill where you almost break your elbow back when you were a freshman

you’re plunging yourself into your past, but weirdly enough every now and then you’ll remember that

oh no, i definitely noticed you

the six little words make you feel giddier than whatever memento you’re seeking out to tuck into your shoebox

you try to tell yourself it’s just because jaehyun is new - he’s new and the memory of him isn’t old enough to try and find anything to represent him by

and he kind of represents everything you’re nervous about - new places, new people, new friendships ...... the prospect of a new love

love?

you look up at the sky as you swing back and forth on the playground you’ve come to collect something from for your memory box

that’s ridiculous. i’ve had one conversation with him!

you swing your legs back and forth, slowing down and you think twice about jumping off when suddenly you feels someone gently push your back

the swing goes a little higher and you turn your head in surprise to see

“j-jaehyun?”

he smiles and his dimples greet you before he does

“i saw you on my way back from johnny’s.”

he gives you another soft push and you hear that fuzzy noise that always turns the gears in your brain when you try to say something around him

“is - is johnny being nice?”

is all you can muster and jaehyun laughs, the sound melodic but low, just the way the baritone of his voice is when he sang

“very nice, but he is a lot to handle sometimes.”

you kick your legs down and dig your heels into the grass a little, jaehyun grabs the two chains of the swings to help you stop it

when you turn you notice his bike is laying a couple of feet away and so is his guitar

“what about the band stuff?”

“johnny is trying to write songs and stuff, but actually mark is the one that i think has the talent for it.”

you can’t help but feel the corner of your mouth lift up a little, he already knows the two of them pretty well.

“what about you - do you write songs or music?”

jaehyun lifts his bike back up and you take the guitar case to help him

before you know it - you and him are walking side by side again

“a little, but it’s more about playing the guitar for me. that’s the part that makes me happy.”

you play with your fingers behind your back, old nervous habits rising to the surface

“by the way - why did you not want to be part of the band? johnny said you were busy with something but you didn’t say what.”

you stop

i should lie, make something up.

jaehyun stops too and the sounds of the bike wheels and footsteps float off into the air

but for some reason, i don’t want to lie. not to him.

“im......leaving after the summer, going to school in another place. so im spending my summer kind of.....im kind of cataloging this place. this town. i’m doing the whole put your memories in a shoebox thing which is so-”

“awesome! i think it’s awesome that you want a part of your home with you, sometimes people are way too excited to get away from their roots.”

you look at jaehyun, who returns the look with a comforting warmth you’ve never experienced before.

it’s a different comfort than the one you get from your friends or your family, it makes your heart beat flutter - slow for a second, then so fast you think your body can’t keep up

he starts walking again and you do too

the silence isn’t weird. it’s a conversation in it’s own way between your two bodies.

when you get to your house - you look at jaehyun again and you have two thoughts

one is that you should kiss him. because he looks so.....kissable.

the second, the one you ultimately choose, is to widen your eyes and go:

“promise you won’t tell the others about it though, they would not let me live it down.”

jaehyun laughs and hooks his pinkie with yours - his skin soft under the setting sun - “i promise.”

and after being caught up in thinking about jaehyun’s eyes, or the way he speaks, you find yourself in the same repeating cycle again

this time. it’s your regret.

you should have chose option one, because it’s looking like another opportunity to kiss jung jaehyun is not coming any time soon.

and like the two times before, you throw yourself into your summer project to try and not think about it

(although you do, multiple times throughout the day, at one point blushing at the image of what could have happened if you DID kiss him and then getting snapped at by the angry man at the local deli)

another couple of weeks pass and you swing by johnny’s because it’s a location on your summer memory list and also....

you are curious about how the band is going ...

and you kind of a little want to see jaehyun again......

you arrive and hear jungwoo’s voice to your surprise, followed by the sound of drums and johnny’s sharp “stop, stop, STOP!”

“jungwoo, what is going on - did working at samsung make you into a robot who can only produce code and not drum to save his life?”

“what do you know about drumming johnny? or coding? or anything in general?”

“hey watch the attitude, you’re embarrassing me in front of jaehyun.”

jungwoo snorts and you try to hide your own laugh but everyone turns to you just in time for you to hiccup it back

“ah - the traitor is here!”

johnny sings and jaehyun gives him a soft elbow to the ribs

“what’s up?”

mark smiles from his place at the keyboard and you cross your arms

“nothing, hows it going - book any shows? write an album yet?”

“actually, we did book a gig for your information”

johnny waltz his way from the microphone and to a stack of flyers from his couch

he hands you one and this time you do burst out into laughter

the flyer, pink and way over the top, is an invitation to johnny’s end of the summer party

well it’s actually his going away party his parents have planned for him, since he’s also leaving for school

“johnny - you didn’t book a gig. you’re playing your own party.”

“the parents are shelling out twenty dollars to each of us so money makes it a gig.”

you look at jaehyun who secretly rolls his eyes

“sure, sure. can i keep one of these?”

you fold the flyer and slip it into your pocket, this will make a good addition to the shoebox

“oh are you going to put it in-”

jaehyun starts and you rush over, hand flying over his mouth as the three other people in the garage stare

“going to put it in......the trash. yes. going to throw it right out because really johnny did you use paint-”

johnny flips you off in the kindest, best friend way possible

you let go of jaehyun and throw him a look that he mouths an apology too

somehow, instead of leaving, you end up staying and listening to them practice

you consider it a break from your project and the day is filled with what you’d expect from all of them, laughter and jokes and banter that is only ok between the closest of people

when they finally finish practice and jungwoo and mark accept a gracious ride home from mr. suh

you say you’ll be off too and jaehyun trots up right behind you, “ill walk with you.”

this time, you hear less of the fuzz in your head and can actually keep up a decent conversation without staring at jaehyun’s lips

you feel closer because of the time you spent today and you almost walk past your house until jaehyun points to the porch

“oh by the way. can i see what you have in the shoebox?”

you look over your shoulder at him, “like right now?”

he gives a casual shrug

“is that ok?”

and now jung jaehyun is standing in your room. well he’s standing in it and then he’s sitting on your bed and rummaging through some of the most personal memories you have.

his long fingers pulling out ticket stubs or notes you passed in class

he chuckles at the graduation photo of johnny and dangles yours over your head when he refuses to give it back

you tackle him for it and he falls down against your sheets and you make the worst (or arguably best) mistake of your life

when you straddle his hips and rich out to grab it

only to look down and see him splayed open like the pages of a beautiful book

and you remember your regret

it makes your head spin, but you watch in slow motion as the photo falls from between his fingers and you lean down to catch it, but jaehyun presses up and catches your mouth with his.

it’s sloppy, awkward - but only for the first few seconds - until you can both adjust yourselves from your position and do it right and then it is

astonishing

because it feels like you’re kissing someone you’ve been kissing for years. decades. millennia's. eons.

it feels like you and jaehyun have been doing this since the big bang.

since humans first came to exist.

since, gosh you don’t know, since pangea freaking broke apart.

you make out for so long that you lose track of time and it gets late to the point where the darkness of the summer almost makes you ask him to stay over

but jaehyun is just so mannerly that he slips out the back door of your house with a final kiss and a promise to call

which he follows up on earlier than you expect, showing up on your doorstep to take you out for breakfast

only to end up with you two back in your room an hour later, kissing again, and again, and with more hands and less of his shirt or yours.

the only thing that unglues you from him is his phone ringing for what must be the tenth time

“it’s johnny”

you breath against jaehyun’s neck finally

“how do you know?”

“only he calls ten times in a row.”

and like your summer project, you don’t tell your friends about what’s going on between you two

jaehyun says it’s kind of hard to hide the obvious evidence on his body - but you tell him to say it was your other neighbor, or someone from another town

jaehyun agrees just because you pull the doe eye trick on him and he really is learning he can’t say no to that or to you in most situations

but everytime before and after band practice - he’s with you

sometimes he joins you on your little visits to the places still on your lists

when you tell him the sentimental value behind them, you get a little fidgety because being vulnerable is hard

but jaehyun listens and he says that each memory of yours he gets to watch you relive, helps him learn something about you

you don’t say it out loud - but hearing that makes you want to cry and kiss him and cry again

an other times, you two don’t do anything heartwarming or special, you just roll around with him, tangled up in one until he has to go

with each day, summer comes closer to

and end but you fall deeper into each other at a pace that might be alarming if it was any other two humans but the both you

and before you know it - it’s the day of johnny’s end of summer slash going away party

jaehyun is supposed to be there from like nine in the morning but he stops at your place before he bikes over

kissing your forehead he drops something in your palm

you open it to see his guitar pick

“won’t you need this for when you play?”

“i’m using my backup. i just thought you might want to put that one in your shoebox........since it could remind you of me......”

he flushes and you bite back your lip, part of you is happy because he’s just so cute it isn’t fair but the other is coming to the daunting idea that

soon enough - im leaving too, will jaehyun just be another memory to me?

instead of dwelling on it, you peck him again and ask,

“ill see you at the party?”

the party is most definitely a johnny suh party

the food is amazing, everyone on the planet is invited, and johnny is wearing something so bright it beats out the sun

when you arrive, his mother spends half an hour asking you to take care of him when he finally leaves and you don’t remind her that you’re going to two different places

you don’t see jaehyun or mark or jungwoo around - you assume they’re practicing somewhere for the performance while johnny is juggling both front lead singer and host

the party is fun - it really is - but the words “going away” somehow still make you a little sick

you’re about to escape to somewhere a little quieter, when you hear someone tap the mic on the makeshift stage in johnny’s backyard

you see him - and the rest of the band - gather on as johnny introduces them and shouts excitedly that this song they’re going to perform, written by keyboardist mark, is all about new beginnings!

jaehyun finds you in the crowd, a secret little smile on his lips before the music starts and to your surprise - and probably everyone elses - they actually do pretty good

the lyrics are so very mark, but johnny brings a flare to the way he sings it

jungwoo seems to have remembered how much he adores drumming again and the way jaehyun looks playing guitar is so enticing that you can’t help but feel a little pride in the fact that you’ve been tasting all of that for most of the summer

the sick feeling in your stomach turns into excitement which turns into just pure enjoyment as you watch your friends and your boyfriend up there having fun

when it’s over and they hop down to mingle back into the rest of the party, you really can’t help yourself and throw your arms around jaehyun

you kiss him - which earns a gasp from mark, a half smirk from jungwoo, and a loud clearing of his throat from johnny

you and jaehyun admit what’s been going on and when johnny just whistles you ask him if he’s not mad

“even if i was mad, you would still keep liking each other right - so what’s the point?”

you hug johnny, and mark, and jungwoo, and like nothing has changed you all fall back into the swing of it

the comfort of being around each other

when you five are the last people in johnny’s messy background you finally decide to tell them all about your summer project

“i knew you’d all say it was lame so i-”

“hey hey hey - it isn’t lame. it’s not what i expect but i get why you’d want to do it.”

johnny pats your shoulder and you feel jaehyun’s hand on the small of your back

it’s the kind of moment you want to never end.

really, you just want this summer to never end.

but when it does - when the day comes for the temperature to drop and for you to be on your way to a new place

you feel the sadness come in a big wave

johnny, mark, jungwoo, and jaehyun all come to say goodbye and you hold the shoebox in your hands - now heavy and filled to the brim with all your memories

before you say it though, each of them adds something

jungwoo drops his samsung internship ID into it

mark places the paper he wrote the draft of the lyrics to the song they performed at the party into it

and johnny chucks a burned CD version of it into the mix

finally, turning to jaehyun, you take in a deep breath

“i know the distance will be big so if you want to break up and-”

he kisses you before you can finish your sentence and slips a small box that you don’t open until you’re already in your new dorm

inside is a small bracelet, engraved on the inside are the words

“i definitely noticed you. it was love at first sight”

years later - jaehyun says those words again

as he’s reading his vows

and you’re feeling the fuzziness, the butterflies, the comforting warmth, everything like a tsunami of all the things that are you and jaehyun

and when johnny shows up to present the rings to you two

they’re in that old shoebox

two little bands at the bottom of all those memories

at the reception, you lean over and whisper to your now husband

“where did you find that old thing by the way?”

jaehyun nuzzles his lips against the cusp of your ear as you watch jungwoo and mark make fools of themselves on the dance floor

“under the bed, where you put everything you care about.”

#WELL !#i really took way too long to write this but just........alot of feelings at once #nct scenarios #nct 127 scenarios #jaehyun scenarios #jaehyun au #nct au #nct 127 au #jaehyun #nct #nostolgic au #jaehyun imagines #nct imagines

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complexmagrparchive · 7 years

Photo

JE SUIS PARTIE LÀ-BAS

NAME › Im Sowon D.O.B. › 02 18 1992 (25) OCCUPATION › Picture Editor at Complex INSTA › @sowonim

PORTFOLIO

EMPLOYMENT

The Star – Assistant Picture Editor (May 2015 - July 2015) Complex – Picture Editor (November 2015 - Present) INTERNSHIP

The New Standard Edition – Photographer/Social Media Intern (December 2013 - February 2014) Blanc Magazine – Fashion Assistant Intern (June 2014 - July 2014) 10 Magazine – General Editorial Intern (August 2014 - December 2014)

SKILLS

Proficient in using latest photo editing software and high-end digital cameras

Ability to handle multiple projects simultaneously and independently

Excellent coordination and communication skills

ACCOMPLISHMENTS

Completed summer intensive in Paris at Parsons The New School

Traveled through Europe for fashion trend research

Various humanitarian experience working with and leading diverse teams

EDUCATION

Paris College of Art – Bachelor’s Degree Study Abroad Program FIT (Fashion Institute of Technology) – Bachelor of Fine Arts in Photography

DETAILS

She’s born to a young but ambitious couple: a woman in her late 20′s who works as an English teacher and a man in his mid 30′s who works as a U.S. diplomat. Their career choices has brought them together on this joyous day to not only celebrate their Parisian experience, but also their first and last child: Im Sowon.

The first decade and a half of Sowon’s life is spent as a traveler, as she doesn’t have a place to really call home. They’re always moving, leaving–and it happens so frequently that eventually, Sowon just stops trying to make a home out of places altogether.

Her parents value cultural diversity, so she’s given private lessons about heritages, languages, and everything in between. Somewhere along the way, the United States becomes a mandatory subject because “That’s where our home is, back in New York City.” But before Sowon can even process that there had been a Statue of Liberty before an Eiffel Tower, she was already taking in Spanish verbs and conjugations.

Sowon’s heart breaks every three years. Because it is every three years that their family has to relocate, because it is every three years that Sowon loses friends and loved ones, because it is every three years that she is reminded, agonizingly so, that nothing for her is permanent.

They’re snuggling on the back of a pickup truck when she realizes that Prince Charming does exist and he’s right here, in Bali. He’s only sixteen–a year older than her–but he already has life figured out and wants her to experience it all with him. Sowon is taken aback by the concept of commitment, however, and dismisses his proposal for the stars above. (“They’re so pretty.”)

Memories are kept by her in photographs. On her last day in Jakarta, she uses her father’s digital SLR camera to take sentimental shots of the people and places of Indonesia. Despite it only being her first attempt, her mother considers–and even insists–that Sowon take up one or two photography lessons as soon as they land in Italy.

Italy is short-lived, but it’s also where circumstances for Sowon begin to change. Here, she falls in love with the culture, the scenery, the wide avenues, and then ultimately, photography–all within a year. It’s only meant to be a hobby, really, but Milan Fashion Week kicks off and she finds herself sitting in front of the television, gaping at the magic unfolding right before her eyes. Maybe this is her calling. Sowon decides she wants to study fashion photography.

They return to the States shortly after. She finishes the last two years of high school in New York and attends the Fashion Institute of Technology the following semester. By then, her parents are already abroad. It’s in these crucial years of independence that Sowon develops a sense of identity, all the while balancing school and internships.

Although her mind is in the right place, her heart is not. She wants to stay committed, find something worthwhile to keep her in New York–but alas, Sowon is ultimately homesick. Not for France, Brazil, or Indonesia, but possibly for somewhere she’s never been to. (Her heart doesn’t break anymore. It’s still in pieces, waiting to be put back together, and maybe that’s why she can’t stay still.)

10Mag hires her and she leaves for Seoul the morning of.

Lesson One: Sowon le Fou.

“They’re stealing my shit.”

It’s one a.m. when Sowon phones her friend from New York. Their conversation is supposed to go something along the lines of, ‘You’re getting married?’ and ‘No way, congratulations!’, but the festive atmosphere quickly fades ten minutes in and all that’s left, really, is a distressed Sowon, who isn’t much of a happy person to begin with.

“Who?”

“The picture editor at The Star. He’s taking advantage of me because I’m only an assistant.” Sowon emphasizes the word ‘assistant,’ because she knows that’s the root of the problem. “They would respect me more if I wasn’t new.”

“Have you tried confronting him?”

Sowon laughs, dryly. “You really think he’d admit it? That guy? Anyway, the company has his back,” she deadpans, sinking into her couch, “I hate the seniority customs they have here. He’s older than me, so I don’t know if I can do much.”

“Right,” her friend responds, “and it’s The Star you’re working for as well. I doubt anyone has the time to deal with image theft.”

“I should still do something about it though, right?” Sowon asks, seeking moral support.

A short pause, and then: “Yes.”

Lesson Two: Le Mépris.

Seoul is expected to have a thunderstorm sometime around noon. Sowon suspects, as lunchtime is approaching, that maybe that’s a sign for doom–a foreshadowing that her confrontation with the editor-in-chief won’t end too well.

She almost backs out of the plan too, until her thief throws a look her way that screams ‘Tu es completement débile.’ – And that’s all it takes for her to barge into the editor-in-chief’s office, honestly.

“Sajangnim,” Sowon begins, and she feels her confidence withering the longer she waits for a reply.

The editor-in-chief looks up from his desk and gives her a pointed look. (The disrespect.)

Sowon continues, “My work has been stolen by Mr. Lee for the third time. I wish you would say something about it to the staff so that I don’t always look like-”

“But aren’t we all working together?”

She swallows her words.

“We’re in the same team, Sowon-ssi. I don’t see a problem when our number one goal is to attract our readers.”

“Excuse me?” Sowon asks. She has to mentally run through a list of French conjugations to diffuse her anger, but the more she stares at the editor-in-chief, the more aggravated she becomes. “I just want credit, is all.”

“Is this really something we should be talking about right now?”

Sowon doesn’t answer.

“Yah, why aren’t you working? Is it even your lunch break yet?”

It’s one thing to be disrespected by her colleagues, but to have her boss of all people stare at her and treat her with disdain is both damaging and degrading.

Sowon hates the way he looks at her–hates the way all her seniors look at her, as if she hadn’t worked hard enough to get here.

Her employment status is still fairly new (three months since she’s been with The Star), but the lack of recognition irks her, gets under her skin. She can’t stand the seniority customs, the mindset that elders are automatically right, no matter how wrong they are. They say it’s best to pay no heed to their words, because what do they know? But sometimes, ignorance isn’t bliss. Sometimes, it just hurts.

Sowon feels herself crumbling. She wonders, for a split second, if Korea is the right place to be.

(Will there ever be a ‘right place’?)

“Merde!” she exclaims, “C’est des conneries! Va te faire foutre!”

There’s a downpour in Seoul for the next hour.

Lesson Three: Tout Va Bien (Pas Vraiment).

They tell her she’s such an American Girl, like it’s supposed to hurt. You Americans are so spoiled. And if it hadn’t been for the pojangmacha over her head, she’d have mistaken this situation for a night out in France. (The French people badmouth Americans, too.)

It’s all so amusing to her, though, how different people around the world think of Americans in the same light–as if there’d been an international consensus that the majority are utter babies.

Sowon can’t deny that her six years in New York has made her pompously entitled, especially in situations where things don’t go her way. And, maybe–as her friends had put it–she was being a little too sensitive that day.

“What do you suggest I do then, oppa?” Sowon is genuinely curious.

“You’re how many years old? 23?”

She nods.

Her female friend chimes in, albeit tipsily, “I think you need to grow up.”

Lesson Four: Hélas Pour Moi.

August and September disappear as quickly as they arrive. October settles in quietly.

Lately, everything feels humdrum blue–empty and eerily still, like the calm before a storm. Days of isolation and desperation turn to hours, weeks, months, driving nothing but schisms and fissures into her chest, hollow where her heart is. It’s all so draining, and it doesn’t help that Seoul feels lonelier than usual.

Maybe she’s homesick again.

“Or unemployed?”

The cheeky remark earns a playful smack from Sowon.

“No, oppa. It’s something about the cold,” she says, honest, “feels… nostalgic.”

He half-chuckles, stares off into the distance like something’s there. “What are you homesick for anyway? France?”

Sowon doesn’t say anything, because she also doesn’t know. Not really. Not yet.

—

“When are you leaving?”

“What, all of a sudden you care now?”

“Maybe I can give you some advice.”

“Soon, like in-a-few-weeks-soon.”

“Oh.”

—

Something is missing.

Sowon realizes this on the morning of oppa’s departure, when her apartment is colored blue and indigo. Something is always missing, and she can’t figure out what it is.

Lesson Five: Faut Pas Rêver.

November rushes in with new beginnings and miracles.

And a letter from Bern.

Grüezi, it reads, I know you probably hate me more than anything right now—in fact, I’d be lucky to have you even read this. But Sowon, listen to me. My moving had nothing to do with you. I couldn’t tell you this in person because I thought you needed some time alone, and—

Sowon skims through the first half of the letter, drops her gaze toward the very last sentence.

I learned a little French for you. “Faut pas rêver.” I hope you never give up your dreams of being a picture editor.

Yours truly.

She stills momentarily–and then trashes the letter altogether.

#cx:accepted #yoon seonah

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fadingfartconnoisseur · 7 years

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Skiing in Alpbachtal – The Alpine Trails of Champions and Gingerbread Villages of Austria

Skiing in Alpbachtal and exploring the Ski Juwel resort was a part of my ‘Year in Austria’ project, as the UK ambassador for the Austrian National Tourist Office. I will be travelling all around the country (from my home base of Vienna) over the next 12 months and showcasing a variety of destinations and activities. Follow #YearInAustria for all stories.

After brushing up on my ski skills in the Salzburg mountain ranges, it was time to head a little further east into the valleys of Alpbachtal and Wildschönau in neighbouring Tirol to edge closer to ski pro status on the slopes.

The winter wonder of the ski area known as ‘Ski Juwel’ is as dazzling as the name suggests, where I stayed in Austria’s ‘Most Beautiful Village’ while skiing in one of Tirol’s Top 10 Ski Resorts. It was exactly what I came to expect from a mountainous playground in Tirol – the region of Austria I call ‘the Narnia of Europe’.

Staying in Alpbach – Austria’s Most Beautiful Village

There are nine villages to choose from in the region, but Alpbach – rated the most beautiful in all of Austria – is the most popular. When I wasn’t inside the cosy confines of my spa hotel, Alpbacherhof for post-sporting revival and the seven-course meal re-fuelling, I could see how this historical town got its accolade.

It’s relatively unchanged, having once been so isolated before a road connected it in 1926. Boutique hotels, restaurants and stores, to the more delicate farmhouses on the hillside, retain the tiny decorative frame details. All the buildings proudly wear their alpine timber architectural style. Former Mayor Alfons Moser declared a law in 1953 that it was mandatory for all buildings to be built using only wood from second floor up in order to retain the original and traditional look. This homogenous style creates a beautiful gingerbread house effect when looking down over the valley from the forest pathways and mountain slopes.

For a better view of the sugar-dusted rooftops, I went on a private snowshoeing tour, testing one of the four tracks around the valley after a morning of ski. From Alpbach there are 19 winter ‘round hike’ panoramic walking routes, circling the village with 250km of trails for multi-hour adventures, in addition to 14 cross-country trails.

The rest stop at the Alpine farmhouse perfectly summed Austrian alpine life – the wooden house, the stillness of nature and the front-seat row to the mountain panorama. I had circled up the valley slopes to watch the candy floss coloured sunset, knowing I had already spent a blue-skied morning up on the very peaks I was looking at.

Staying in Alpbach is not to discard the other villages though, all of which are filled with long-standing traditions of local life. The medieval village of Rattenberg in particular is known for its class blowing craft, while craft beer lovers can head to the one-man brewery in Inneralpbach and try the unique beers brewed by local, Jos Moser.

Tirol is known for its food in particular, from the potato fry up of Tiroler Gröstl to the many knödel (dumping) dishes and even ravioli made with local cheeses, which I tried. In Alpbachtal, over 100 farms still operate in the area, and culinary enthusiasts can choose dishes made with locally sourced produce by looking out for the green Tiroler Wiktshaus stamp in the menu.

Skiing in Alpbachtal – Practice to Pro in Ski Juwel

Of course, I was also back in Tirol to ski, and with Alpbachtal Wildschönau’s playground of 46 cable lifts that take you up to 109km of piste, I had a lot of choice. If there is one thing I always remember about Tirol or define it by, it’s the spectacular mountain views. From the high peaks of Ski Juwel you can hit the powder of the 26km of blue runs, 54km of red or 13km of black while surveying the dream-like Kitzbühel Alps, Rofen Range and Brandenberg Alps from all angles.

My third ever ski session, it was here that I began to pick up pace. The turns were sharper and more frequent, my confidence to hit slightly steeper slopes increased and I ventured on a blue trail within two hours of hard practice.

In Austria you will learn how to ski quickly.

A huge part of this was finally finding an instructor where everything from personality to precise technique training methods was a perfect fit. My instructor, Harald was like a cool father figure who would laugh when you were slightly naughty losing control and getting off the ski-lift three seconds too late (by accident), feed you chocolate in bad moments and let you race him a little when you were on an adrenalin high.

On the first morning we took various blue trails that curved gently around mountain ledges and tackled short sections of blue slopes with an incline that challenged you. I remember getting to the start of a blue-signed trail marked with the number 61 and asking Harald if we were actually going on it.

He had previously mentioned that this track known as Frosty’s World was a ‘kid’s trail’, to ease any nerves. You will never forget the first time you complete a trail – it’s euphoric and incredibly addictive. So much so that I kept putting off lunch until we had completed another blue run, and another…

By the second day, Harald took me on my first red slope.

I had to finally face a fear. The one where I would always pass a red sign, and have a little peek down, reassured by Harald each time that we hadn’t taken a wrong turn and that this was the only way down.

After one blue warm-up on the next morning of ski, Harald stopped in front of a red sign again and I asked my usual question: “We are not going down there are we?” This time he said yes, and he absolutely meant it.

It felt as if the incline had almost doubled and I freaked out, having to stop repeatedly to catch my breath, which was only eased by the panoramic views of compete serenity.

Harald kept apologising, assuring me that he was confident I was ready for this, telling me he also wanted nothing more than to also show me some of the best views of all the land, accessed only by such journeys.

Skiing gives you exclusive access to nature’s best views.

Alas, adrenalin can be overkill, but I wasn’t upset or deflated. I had finally found an instructor who pushed me out of my comfort zone, and knew how to take my enthusiasm for ski and plough that energy into action. The Austrian ski team train in Alpbachtal Wildschönau regularly, and you’ll see it’s quite the winter canvas to polish your skills on the powder.

“Harald, we have absolutely no choice but to get down this mountain!” I would keep saying, my stubbornness reigning. Once you have started there is, of course, only one direction to take.

In what was quite possibly the longest adrenalin fuelled journey I’ve ever taken – down the longest red slope of the resort in small bursts, with a little hand-holding, tumbles and instructor-assisted side-sliding here and there. I was determined to achieve the status of having completed a red, even if it took hours.

Mountain Activities Aside from Traditional Ski in Ski Juwel Alpbachtal Wildschönau

The highest peaks in Ski Juwel, like Großer Galtenberg, are not just playing grounds for traditional ski. The Wiedersbergerhorn lift gets you to 2,025m and Schatzberg is the next high peak lift at 1,903m. At both you can dine in a mountain huts, play in the obstacle filled snowparks or take a tandem paraglide right off the snowy mountain ledges. In Schatzberg, you can also take the 5km toboggan track down to the village of Auffach. It’s one of seven in the region.

I couldn’t indulge in a winter paraglide flight due to weather conditions and nor did I find the time to ride in a piste basher and be a snow plough pilot. 85% of all slopes here have snow making facilities, and this is one way to be one of the first on the fluffy, fresh snow.

The Reither Kogel is the place for long hikes. The 2.5km circular mountain walk being a popular route, accessed from the top of the cable car in either direction, with the lift routes leading you back to the village of Reith im Alpbachtal. This is also the mountain for speed enthusiasts. I’m keen to test the permanent Giant Slalom racetrack on the upper slopes when I am more confident with my technique and head to The Lanerköpfl chair lift in Niederau for the ‘Race ‘n’ Boarder Arena’ and its dedicated carving zone.

The Ski Juwel resort of Alpbachtal Wildschönau combines all the elements of Austrian alpine goodness – incredible valley views, challenging ski, alternative winter activities and preserved cultural traditions. From one end of the Kitzbüheler Alps where I first took to skis one year ago, to the other where I followed the ski trails of champions and achieved my biggest milestone here, Tirol remains my treasured winter haven.

Things to Know:

Ski Juwel is the merger of the ski areas includes the two valleys of Alpbachtal and the Wildschönau high valley.

The Alpbachtal Seenland region is made up of 10 resorts: Alpbach, Brandenberg, Breitenbach, Brixless, Kramsach, Kundl, Münster, Radfeld, Rattemberg and Reith im Alpbachtal.

The Alpbachtal Seenland Card gives you access to: The free bus service in the region, free admission to the adventure wave pool, guided torch lit walks, guided snowshoe walks and biathlon and ice-curling, as well as discounts at shops, museums, excursions and more. It is free of charge at all accommodation partners when booking at least a one-night stay.

There are over 600 accommodation facilities in the area from farmhouse holiday to 4-star spa hotels.

There guided snowshoe walks in Alpach once a week (Thursday at 10am) and ski mountaineering evening every Tuesday on Reither Kogel. You can be the first to ski on fresh slopes at 8am every Sunday if you book in advance.

Pristine snow seekers, you can get a special pass to hit some the virgin slopes in the area at 8am every Sunday.

How much is a ski pass and lessons in Ski Juwel Alpbachtal Wildschönau?

Prices for a package of 3 night accommodations in Alpbach Valley, 3 day ski pass and an Alpbachtal Seenland card, start from €182 per person/

There are five local ski (and snowboarding) schools. My ski instructor, Harold, was from the Alpbach Aktiv Ski School and I highly recommend him. After two hours with him my ski skills greatly improved.

Where to eat and Apres Ski in Ski Juwel Alpbachtal Wildschönau

There are 25 ski huts (three of which are new in 2016/17) to stop and rest, eat and après ski. The highest point in the ski resort – the Wiedersbergerhorn) is the Horn Alm. Wurmegg-Hochleger Hut is at the top of Schatzberg and the new Norderberg Alm is on the Lanerkopfl run in Niederau. There’s also the Hornboden lounge at Wiedersbergerhorn and Gipföhit at Schatzberg.

Where to stay in Alpbach

I stayed at the Hotel Alpbacherhof (alpbacherhof.at), a spa hotel situated right in the very centre of Alpbach, and less than two minutes from the ski bus stop.

How to get to Ski Juwel Alpbachtal Wildschönau

By train: The closest train stations are Jenbach or Wörgl and there is free bus travel from the stations to your accommodation (with valid booking confirmation).

The Ski Juwel area is 15 minutes from the nearest motorway exit – 40 minutes from Innsbruck airport, 90 minutes from Munich airport.

Further Information and Research

For a complete list of activities and events, alongside costs and accommodation options, visit the Alpbachtal Seenland website.

Inspiration on the ski season in Austria and beyond can be found on the comprehensive site for Austria Tourism.

Further Reading on the Winter Season in Austria from Borders of Adventure

My first ski lesson in the Kitzbüheler Alps in Tirol

My second ski lesson in the Salzburg Mountains, one year on

Taking to the snow on two wheels in the Austrian Alpine

A comprehensive list of non-ski winter activities to try in Austria

The post Skiing in Alpbachtal – The Alpine Trails of Champions and Gingerbread Villages of Austria appeared first on Borders Of Adventure.

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