#ik im not the first wondering about this but
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i wonder what's in yoo joonghyuk's mind when he read this lines straight from the manuscript: [Eyebrows seemingly drawn by a single, uninterrupted stroke of a famed artist's brush; a nose and a chin shaped in perfect angles that defied attempts to measure them through mere devices of men; a pair of deep eyes seemingly carved out of a beautiful jewel containing all the misfortunes found in the world.] … like man's waxing poetry about your handsome looks and you believe kim dokja is fucking straight? who you fooling, bakayero
#ik im not the first wondering about this but#let's be real there is NOTHING and i mean NOTHING STRAIGHT about the way kdj describe yjh's looks#man's crushing real hard on his unpopular blorbo#orv spoilers#kim dokja#yoo joonghyuk#joongdok#dokjoong#orv#omniscient reader's viewpoint#omniscient reader
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i fear that the undercover top secret government assassins are growing on me (cp9)
#I HAD ZERO THOUGHTS ABOUT THEM AT FIRST#IN FACT I WAS DEVASTATED THAT THE WATER 7 QUARTET WERE ACTUALLY CP9#BUT THEN??????? I READ CP9'S INDEPENDENT REPORT AND. I!?!??!?@?!?#the thoughts are endless ive been having one piece dreams every night for the past few days and they have all been cp9 related the brainrot#is so bad. i am sodgjkadhg#i love one piece there are so many characters with each new arc i get to i get some new characters to obsess over i love it i feel so alive#ive been fighting tooth and nail avoiding spoilers for the latest episode BUT GOD IM SO SO TEMPTED TO. TAKE A PEEK#anyways last night i was once again doing a wiki deep dive and i found some silly things on cp9's pages#JABRA AND LUCCI ARE THE SAME HEIGHT!!!!! THIS IS SO FUCKING FUNNY#CAN YOU IMAGINE?!?!?! the kid you've had beef with since he was 13 (maybe even earlier since lucci alreayd knew him when he was 6) who you#used to have a whole head over is now at eye level with you i would actually be so embarrased#KAKU IS FROM EAST BLUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS OS IMPORTANT ACTUALLY!! THE MOST IMPORATNT FACT EVER!!!!!!!!!!!#so he knows the strawhats are...also from the east blue right?!? right??????! and ik the wg steals these kids early on to train them so i#doubt he has lingering attachments to his home sea but i still think this so both so so sad and so important :'((#also not getting over how oda's depiction of tiny kaku has him holding a toy boat BC ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!?! ARE YOU K IDDING ME#kalifa and jabra's favourite dishes are both lamb based!!!!!!!!! silly because her animal motif is a sheep haha#BUT ALSO considering how her father was also cp9 and she's probably been conditioned since birth to also follow his footsteps and how jabra#holds seniority in the current lineup id like to think that these two have known each other a very long time and there were influences#the most dysfunctional fcked up family ever. cp9#blueno and jabra are both from the north blue!!!!!!!!!!!!! and that one falshbakc we see that the two of them plus 6year old lucci trained#together but also it would be so fcked up if the two actually knew of each other before being roped into the governemnt#idk how the wg works do they just??? routinely scout around and pick up a bunch of kids ata time???? were jabra and blueno taken together??#also wondering if ... kalifa jabra and kumadori knew each other the longest as fellow agents or soemthing#i feel like im entertaining a gazillion thoughts all at once its so hard ot balance but we know both kalifa nad kumadori have#parents in the governemnt/assassin profession that also influenced them right#idk maybe one thing they can bond over#cp9 to me is just a fucked up family of some sort. they are not found family they are like some weird forged family where they were all#forced together and somehow made it work and they all love lucci and care for his wellbeing enough to raise all that money to get him to a#doctor and they cared about each other enough to get off enies lobby together without leaving anyone behind and they went cafe hopping and#shopping and bowling together and they all care for each other in their own way
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see i have a handful of hw event ideas in my head and i would loveee to ramble abt wonder stage return event but. i would need to finish the previous event ideas in my head first. nhfghfdfn
#mono’s stuff#currently the idea i default to is. emu1 > wonder halloween rui1 > nene > tsukasa1#BUT. nene’s event could also maybe go first. first steps of getting over her stage fright.#emu’s event has to go before rui’s though. cause now that ik i want wonder stage to come back wonder halloween happens there#and emu event is when the rest of the group gets properly introduced to the wonder stage i believe#im not sure abt what tsukasa’s event would entail though. maybe smth about him overworking himself for a show. trying to make#sure his performance is good enough. not accepting help or breaks. i dunno. something along those lines.#probably after rui event? it could work before rui’s though…..#fhgndhagfn. i love thinking abt them. but why are they hard to sort out….#the only one i have a kind of solid idea on exactly what happens in the event is emu. i’ve thought a lot abt rui wonder halloween but im#still thinking abt what happens post-tsukasa injury#dont mind me rambling in the tags like this dkjhjfsudjfo
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assigning a character the highest honour like *adds go home by julien baker to their playlist*
#and by honour i mean pointing at them like TRAUMATISED! TRAUMATISED! TRAUMATISED!#like yeah relating to this song is a red flag actually. yeah it's one of the most personal songs in the world to me#and i actively am not allowed to listen to it some days bc it makes me significantly worse#even if im in a GOOD mood because of the layers upon layers of emotions ive associated with it#yeah i literally wont even blorbo post to this song even if it's accurate to a character because it's so personal#so they have to be REALLY FUCKING SPECIAL AND FUCKED IN THE HEAD to get this honour. enter touya#i made him a playlist im going crazy like yeah actually of course i was always gonna be weird about him#like he's got fire themes. he's got body horror. he just wanted to be good. he's ethel cain coded. he's georgia coded#he's got mommy AND daddy AND sibling issues. he's the only other character ive let even come close to mary on a cross#he's a waiting room girlie. he's an archer girlie. im tearing my hair the fuck out of my scalp#why does the first character ive latched onto this hard since CHUUYA have to be from mha of all things#like that's embarassing for me im embarassed to be here. and yet#touya todoroki#the thing that makes me sick about touya is yes the abuse he went through via his quirk and his dad etc etc#but also bc sekota peak happened when he was 13 right? and he's 24 now? that's 11 years unaccounted for#like ik it's confirmed his burns put him in a coma for 3 years and all for one and the dr guy just stapled his stubborn self together#which is something else i will YELL MY HEAD OFF ABOUT WHAT THE FUCKKKKK HE WAS A CHILD STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT#but im pretty sure it's confirmed that after 3 years he goes off again on his own? which still leaves him as a teenager?#like he straight up burns himself alive at 13 wakes up at 16 and reappears at 24 with dyed hair and piercings and a bad attitude#and im not supposed to wonder? or get upset? like i absolutely am leaning into the 'he was on the streets' angle bc i hate myself#and that's devastating and also what alternative is there logically like he has NOTHING#no home no money no name that he can feasibly use not even an appearance that will warrant anything but more cruelty#so youve got this child on the streets with injuries that absolutely cause insane amounts of pain daily he's literally STAPLED together#and he's completely alone and the only thing getting him through is this growing hatred and rage#like id set all my plans around killing the guy that put me there too actually just to fucking get me out of bed in the morning#I CANNOT STOP THINKING ABOUT HIM. WHERE WAS HE FOR THE PAST DECADE. HORIKOSHI PLEASE#I WANNA GO HOME IM SICK THERES MORE WHISKEY THAN BLOOD IN MY VEINS MORE TAR THAN AIR IN MY LUNGS#PIERCE MY SKIN NEEDLES TO WORN OUT RAGS THE FOLDS IN MY ARMS THE SICKENING BLACK AND I HAVENT BEEN TAKING MY MEDS#I KNOW MY BODY IS JUST DIRTY CLOTHES IM TIRED OF WASHING MY HANDS GOD I WANT TO GO HOME
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Im in such an obey me mood today haha
other than "pls dont tell asmo about that",,,, i have questions about these freaking vegetables
(im putting under the cut since im talking about food and bad eating habits/diet related stuff)
im assuming they would have to be mixed with other regular ingredients to prevent the hunger but it sounds like ppl would use them as the main component in a dish or just eat them by themselves
So does all of it get digested? No leftovers (waste) comes out the other end im guessing? is it like a magic type thing?? it has to be right? Cause if not...ur body will take the calories needed to replace the ones burnt, take the nutrients, and the rest will just get tossed out
And since it doesnt make you full, like wouldnt it be way too easy to overeat this type of thing? so you could accidentally end up making urself go to the restroom more often :/
Ig if it gives u the nutrients u need that itll be useful then. So maybe its a 'heres ur macros for the day' type dealo? but u still have to go eat an actual meal or make sure u mix it with other stuff tho
#ik its just a silly joke type text but i do like to take these things and overthink them and apply them to real life#its just interesting to me cause ik the answers will never come so its like a brain exercise or something#eating disorder tw#just to be safe#but yea..................#im gonna just go off in the tags cause im just wondering about when this would be useful cause regular veggies are the better choice to me#ig that could be useful in a very specific circumstance where you went over calories but still need certain macros..but like...its veggies#going over for some for veggies isnt that big a deal imo but if ur mostly concerned with deficit then ud cut anywhere u can...#u could also like use it to lessen the calories in the dish overall and maybe add more of the ingredients u actually like#tho i feel like it would not remove that many calories in the first place#and ud probably wouldnt even get to add that much more of what u actually want in comparison#and then...ur gonna be hungry cause u took away a big volume of the food which was the regular vegetables#but for me when im making food the last thing im worried about in my dish is the freaking vegetables#im trying to add more veggies and less of everything else ._.#i feel like this would make more sense if it was like a sugary treat#especially if this is supposed to be a thing that helps with cravings#u get to eat and enjoy the thing without consequence (for the most part) while eating a more restrictive diet#tho it would probably be even more dangerous than the veggies when it comes to overeating...#idk how the demon biology works but it seems about the same to humans but just more durable#and with asmos eating habits...i can already see in my minds eye whats gonna go down#it just seems like a bad idea all around to tell him about this!#obey me nightbringer
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as the days inch closer to the release date of the digital release, so does my temptation to tl it just for the chuucon—
#no i ✨d o n o t✨ currently have time to tl this#nor do i want to do it on my own bc typesetting is a ✨p a i n i n t h e a s s✨#yes ik i have 2 vols of idol sengen to catch up on… but kawaikute gomen has *2* toxic twt girlies while idol sengen only has asuna s o#and just. the story of kawaikute gomen is one of *those* stories that you can enjoy even when you turn off your brain after a long day#it’s *the* pettiest and funniest story hw has ever told (and im counting the gen 1 mochiaka (+ haruki) misunderstandings)#it’s even funnier than ken’s reverse-tsundere fail on arisa back in the days of ijiwaru na deai#man. i really really r e a l l y wanna talk about the manga but not enough people have read it yet aaaaaa#i esp wanna talk about yuna. concon. fox girlie aizo stan.#…or at least i hope her name is really read as yuna. only her last name (sahara) came with furigana#eh i’ll go with yuna until otherwise corrected lol she’s a hilariously petty d e l i g h t#i wonder who’ll get a va first though.. asuna or yuna? toxic manga-only twt girlie no. 1 or toxic manga-only twt girlie no. 2?#chizuutan chizpost
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rambling about the tdd manga because i can lol:
the entire thing sure did reinforce how convoluted chuuoku’s schemes are lol all that just to test run and create the drbs bruh 😭😭😭
the line at the end where ichijiku and otome are discussing how much more poignant the battles are because they brought them together and then forced them to fight is all sorts of fcked up y’all 😭😭😭😭😭😭
anyway from the beginning lol the mic otome uses is a different mic from even just the next chapter, i wonder if it’s just an non-finalized design or an early iteration of the mic???? like rio has a prototype mic and this is not that lmao. aaaaah but rio’s might be military grade prototype and otome has the version rei presumably finalised on his own???? a different version altogether???? hmmm 🤔
nemu is 16 in that first chapter and ichiro is 17 which would mean all the territory disputes, fixes, and mozuku’s plot to usurp mcd took place in a week lol hypmic’s timeline is SHAKY
(the official timeline helps this a little actually lol)
(maybe)
kuukou, swinging red flags from the beginning making fun of ichiro’s mom lol, also fcked around making fun of samatoki’s dead father and found tf out lmao
kuukou is an entire menace in the tdd manga i see why i had a hard time telling myself not to like him when he first showed up lmao
that theory kuukou might have some sort of brain damage wound up slightly reinforced when kuukou remembered sasara reused an old joke when he seemed to have forgotten that sasara is not funny by the time they reunited lmao he has a great memory in the tdd manga
(that joke sasara reused was only in samatoki’s presence too so kuukou also broke some sort of dimensional wall lmao)
speaking of sasara!!!!!!
ikeBOOBkuro????? really????? and then he had that dumbshit d🍆ck joke he made in dod the clowns DO NOT have rights!!!!!!!!!!
lol tho every time i read these early chapters with sasara, aramaki-san’s track 3 sasara always comes to mind lol like mcd sasara was intimidating actually that’s exactly why track 3 sasara is like that 😭😭😭😭😭😭
hmmmm are the special forces or whatever that tried to hijack the hospital jakurai worked at the same as rio’s special forces???? i’ll have to keep that in mind reading bbmtc manga lol
I STILL BELIEVE JAKURAIS WAVE TECHNIQUE WAS THE VERY FIRST ITERATION OF THE HYPNOSIS MIC TECH
still a little pissed mcd vs nb was the first drb in structure and symbolism (forced conflict created by a higher ruling power used to gain/reinforce power by said higher power and wound up entertaining the masses) and yet sasara and kuukou were booted out of the narrative like that
there was a moment where i Almost Almost considered that ramuda had started to consider bringing sasara and kuukou into his plans in chapter 11 based on how pissed he looked after ichijiku told him they brainwashed them. it’s more likely that ramuda’s mad another ‘him’ died more than anything but it’s nice to consider lol
the terrorist scene where nemu and the baby yamada bros got kidnapped is still insane btw
iconic samajuto first(?) meeting lol lemme just handcuff myself to this man who is already listening to me said juto lmao
NEMUS NERVES OF STEEL FR AN OLD MAN THREATENS BODILY HARM TO HER BUT LITERALLY NOBODY IS SCARIER TO HER THAN HER FATHER SO SHE NEVER FLINCHED
JIROS FIRST BETRAYAL ITS NO WONDER HE STARTED ADOPTING SOME OF ICHIROS SELF PRESERVATION LESSONS
THE FACT SABURO BLOCKED NEMU OUT FROM HIS MEMORY SO LIKELY THIS ENTIRE KIDNAPPING????? PLS PROTECT THE CHILDREN HE HAS PTSD YALL AT 11
and what was UP with that orphanage director in the first place???? who do you choose: money grubbing, child labour exploiting for hoes orphanage director or murderous, gets off on torture and sells children for their superiority complex orphanage director
like WTF????
(also: that extra bb tdd chapter is fcked up too you know mozuku only told ichiro about that first director wasting funds because he wanted to replace him with his associate 🤬)
the face nemu makes when samatoki starts kicking her kidnappers while they’re down help 😭😭😭😭😭😭
in the final tdd bonus, they adapted jakurai’s story he told to dohifu during their championship celebration and used that story to show jakurai had already been slowly awakening his ability. so i think it’s incredible smic didn’t suffer from hearing loss after slamming sticks into their eardrums lol maybe that’s where sensei’s ability started forming
kuukou in chapter 9: man check out all these cute girls!!!! 😁
kuukou in the nb drama track: why tf would you pay to talk to women????
(very unrelated instances lol but hilarious out of context tho)
kuukou and sasara going home in the same direction gave them time to talk and get to know each other and i wanna know what their conversations were about soooooo bad bro 😭😭😭😭
mcd/nb break up Did Not Happen I Do Not See It 😑
that moment where samatoki tells nemu ichiro’s kindness is his weakness because he saw ichiro’s breakdown over kuukou leaving him is— it’s kinda— 😭😭😭😭😭😭
yotsutsuji is an unsung mvp in this manga lol look at all the legwork he put in managing territories and finding intel
tdd was the group ramuda made and it was the group he made for himself but it was never his in the first place 😕
but if yotsutsuji never found out ramuda’s secret, or here; if yotsutsuji didn’t manage to send jakurai an email about it, idk if rmjk would have separated???? like what was the plan for jakurai??? ramuda said jakurai was his nirvana so i guess until chuuoku forced it, kp likely would have stayed together huh?? 🤔
ramuda: chuuoku kidnapped your brothers ichiro!!!!!
ichiro: AGAIN?????
me: damn took the words right out of my mouth lmao
samatoki’s beef with ichiro came from the lies they had nemu tell samatoki but like,,,,,,,,,,,, i kinda wanna know how the damage would have shaped if nemu hadn’t been brainwashed and went on her own will,,,,,,,,,,,
like ichiro admitted he likely would have done the same thing as samatoki but that hurt and betrayal at that moment……..????? well ig it’d go the same way in the end lol
chapter 9 had a conversation with rei and otome where rei praises her son for having balls lol so dice was on the run by 18 and making a name for himself lol i need to keep that in mind for a certain few chapters in both fpmtr runs
i thought it was interesting the battle that brought japan under tdd took place in osaka lol
also came out of this experience wondering once again when did ichiro get his hypnosis ability lol like ramuda already had his jakurai’s developed throughout the story, as did samatoki’s on the dl, but ichiro????
also came out of this very concerned for what this story has in store for nemu again lol like the way rhyme anima put focus on what she could possibly do as well as the end of this manga having otome and ichijiku musing her ability and skill might rival ichijiku’s 🤔
ooooooh and that kp bonus chapter!!!!!! ramuda had jakurai suffering under that waterfall lol like he was about to contract hypothermia after a little bit and ramuda ‘reasons’ it’s good training for taking hits without being knocked out SO YOU KNOW WHO REGULARLY TRAINS UNDER WATERFALLS FOR HOURS AT A TIME WITH A FOCUS BASED ABILITY HARAI KUUKOU—
#this is vee speaking#it was a fun time lol always is#samatoki and ichiro’s relationship in those first few chapters cracks me up the same way rio and saburo’s rhyme anima relationship does lol#like both instances rio and samatoki just lay down the law with a smack down and stand up and go ‘here’s some more tools for your success’#smack down be damned lmao#kinda cried over the nb/mcd break up that didn’t happen this read thru lol#it was just the little things that subtly drove home how important kuukou was to ichiro 😭😭😭#like that face off with nb&mcd vs mozuku was a fight for ichiro’s freedom like no wonder that hug was Like That kuukou was happy for him#ichiro was glad he was there 😭😭😭😭😭😭 and ichiro was glad kuukou’s steady presence was staying right by him IM WEAK#nemu was such a good big sister figure to jiro and saburo i’m sad nemu didn’t get to befriend the yamadas like she wanted to 😭😭😭#ik ichiro crying over kuukou was a bit of a reset for samatoki but if anything that should show just how much ichiro would treasure nemu#don’t fight nemu and ichiro getting close samatoki y’all are meant to be one big happy family lmao#and i am not getting over saburo blocking her from memory saburo is not okay!!!!! he’s not!!!!!!#i should analyse saburo’s ability for what it pertains to himself like its name is ‘delete’ and here’s saburo deleting his memories like 😭😭#anyway plenty more to think about which was the point of this reread lmao#canon’s starting back up in less than two months now’s a good time for it actually 🤔#c: rapping boys
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if i ever seem brave for some of the stuff i admit on here, just know its cause idk how to keep shit to myself. i cower at the thought of judgement and then proceed to expose my whole ass to tumblr anyway, because i dont have a working filter
#tags are filled with worried rambling again#i hear a laugh track play whenever my anxiety flares up#im scared of what other people think of me which in itself is funny#ik others opinions of me arent an indicator of me being a bad person#other people arent gonna kno my whole personality from the stuff i draw#i fear judgement despite experiencing nothing but positive feedback on this site because i keep reading into the small things as negative#i know all this and still wither away in my shell knowing all this im saying is what id tell others if they were suffering with it#i walk in this circle and do it thousand times til i pass out from the exhaustion and later wonder y i was worried in the first place#i want to be able to say “who cares they dont know you” but ive been raised by people who spent almost every conversation-#with me basically saying they know me very well and know whats wrong with me and ive been raised believing everyone knows more than me#i worry of being so serious and actually genuine like this but this is how i like to be sometimes#stupidly thinking too much into things and laughing at myself for it and wondering why i would put myself down on something id encourage-#others to do#i worry about losing people because they wont like all of me but they wont know that unless they see the whole picture#i find myself disgusting w/ my thoughts and the things i wanna create but i dont think that of others and its strange#weird ass moment here.....#i had a really good day today got a job and finished my first tattoo#im happy right now despite the shit i just spewed#im figuring myself out for the first time in maybe years#i just wish all the hateful shit i absorbed over those years fades away soon#and i hope i stop caring so bad lol#anywayyyyy have a wonderful rest of your weekkk <3 if u read this
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did i make a mistake?
#sigh dawnie crush issues in the tags#so yeah fair warning#...........................................................................................................................................#idk man I just. i feel like instead of getting closer weve grown more distant ever since he asked me out and its killing me man#i dont wanna be hurt. im so fragile rn and just starting to heal from the years of trauma i faced in my family. when i try to talk#about any issue i have to him he just. ignores the text#or gives me a very dry response which hey. im not trying to say u should listen to my issues all the time. i get that some people dont want#to. but i would just much rather have someone tell me that directly yk? just a hey i dont do well with rants. but the thing is he said hes#fine with them. but then when i get nothing to address it i just. i feel hurt. like... ive started to wonder if hes just keeping the#relation for namesake at this point but ik that isnt true. weve only been dating 2 weeks or so i shouldnt judge so soon. but man its hard#to not overthink ive always been conditioned to do that. ive always been super excited when he plans a date (which he doesnt even call#a date) but when i try to plan smth its always that he has some other plan to attend to which again i get it im not the jealous date who#asks her s/o to be for her every waking moment but yk it does hurt and i feel instead of just letting it bottle up its better to admit it.#i tried to ask him to get cotton candy once and he said wed go the next day and then he forgot. never asked me a time or anything. i didnt#think of it much cuz hed gone to meet a friend outside the city and he mustve been tired. yesterday i asked him again and he said he was#again going outside the city to meet his 12th grader friend. man am i jealous of that girl who gets to spend more time with the guy#who asked me out than ive collectively spent with him#and no i dont mean this in a toxic way like “oh hes meeting other girls he shouldnt do that” i just. man i pictured so much out of my first#relationship. and i got nothing. not one thing out of it. i guess it makes sense cuz my love language is mostly physical touch and u cant#really do that in a campus in India. and its also wrong of me to hold him to such high standards of a perfect relationship when the guy#himself has been in one for the first time (i assume?) but like i said id rather not try to hide my emotions and express them out openly.#theres still so much more about this that i feel wrong but the thing is its confusing cuz i feel like the two years of torture in my house#has made it so that the trauma from never hearing i love you wnd words of affirmation from my parents has been reflecting off this place.#its wrong of me to do this but i expected everything that i couldnt recieve to be fulfilled in a relationship and i now realise how stupid#i was yk? cuz its wrong of me to put such harsh expectations on him like that. i feel like such a shallow person for getting depressed over#a relationship that has just been going for 1 week#theres also the thing where he generally seemed more excited to talk to me before? and now i just get the dryest responses ever out of#which no conversation can be built. and again im not expecting him to be online and respond immediately but a thoughtful response goes a#long way. again ik im being so harsh on him cuz its his first time too and he must be facing the same awkwardness im facing but jesus. i#ok my tags are over im continuing in a reblog
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hello marie, hope ur okay! so, there’s this girl on Wattpad who’s claiming that she finally got your permission to translate tts, is that true or… she’s just lying ?!
https://www.wattpad.com/1318890612
why can't these people just leave me alone?
#in case y'all were wondering this is a big part of why i don't write hl anymore#i know it's not fair to the majority of people who are so lovely and encouraging and respectful and supportive#but this kind of disrespectful shit started in the early pandemic when i was really depressed and uninspired and i was started to feel less#interested in 1d cos nothing was happening#and i can't even begin to tell you how it felt... to already feel so low in personal life and then to see the way my work was treated......#it really changed my relationship to this fandom. in bad ways.#and ik im prob. gonna get some anon saying im annoying for complaining/that theyre glad im gone or whatever mean shit i always get when im#being honest about what it felt like to be a creative person in this fandom#but whatever this is my blog and some of the people who steal others' stories should know how it feels#and it feels like shit#about me#i have like... a message from that person from like... last friday ?? asking permission#and i didnt reply cos i simply did not see it#cos i dont open wattpad#unless someone sends me a link to a stolen copy of my fic#idk when they started posting maybe they did ask first#but still#its written in my ao3 profile#its written in the tts author's note#its fucking written on my twt profile#i dont know how much clearler i can make myself#idk maybe im a bad person their message says theres a revolution in iran and thats why i should say yes... idk
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**KISSES THEM BOTH AND PICKS THEM BOTH UP OFF THE GROUND
#ot3: ❤rhyme💛easy💙#tape entry circa 1980#I WAS ABLE TO LIFT THEM BOTH UP OFF THE GROUND IN MY ARMS IN A DREAM SO THATS REAL NOW HFJDSK#i love them SOO SOOO SOO SO SO SO SOSOSOSOSO MUCH#every day i think of them and long for them#i just long for a happy life w them both... i want the simple things so badly tbh i want to fall asleep and wake up next to them every day#to make food for them and to cook together to go grocery shopping and running errands just whatever as long as its w them#there is beauty in everything even in the simple even in the ugly... and w them that beauty is so blindingly there at all times#i want to experience every little thing w them and be comforted by them and for them to comfort me too...#like when i broke the first elo album i ever owned and just BROKE down crying about it because of how important it was to me#and they went out immediately to try to find another first pressing to replace it#idk i just keep thinking about them and i keep feeling so sad because im not w them#the thought i could ever be w/o them makes me feel such deep dread that it makes me nauseous like ik i wouldnt be able to live w/o them#theyre my everything my life my loves my truest soulmates#id do anything to be home w them in the 80s to go on our rollerskating dates and to browse music for hours and hangout at the mall#idk i just cant stop thinking i just cant... i just love them more than life itself#i think everything in this world has beauty in it but when it comes to min and ryan its like nothing can even hold a candle to them#if the world is beautiful then they are ethereal#i was playing my guitar for a few hours today and just couldnt help but wonder if my min and ryan are proud of me...#if im... enough for them i guess#i havent been playing my whole life like they have so i feel like i cant match up... but ik they love me#and ik im good enough for the band and they would reassure me over and over of that#i just kinda wish they could love and reassure me in person#and then we could play and sing together :"-] id love to hear our voices together... i think my voice would go so perfectly w theirs
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man i love ocellus she’s one of my fave mlp characters *literally ignores most of her actual canon scenes*
#pondering what ill do with the young six in this au bc i do wanna keep em around. i like em#but i dont want them to be part of weird xenophobe plot#man tho. a young changeling thats meek and quiet around others and prefers to readto herself at first#but then grows more social... with the context of the changelings' entire backstory for being parasites that drained love#like??? omg thats interesting. is she meek bc shes afraid of what she'll do to others?#is being so young while all this change is happening stressful on her? how does she feel about all of it?#well season 8s totally got u covered with....... like one scene where she wonders if changelings can change at all and shes talked out of it#and the one other scene with her regarding her life in the hive is played as a joke bc 'ha ha silly culture doesnt understand pony christmas#(which ik sounds pretty out there but like the point of that episode is to show off different cultures celebrating winter holidays#so like yeah its a goofy scene in of itself but just weird with that context in that its meant to represent diversity#i get none of the young six were developed well but man im lacking in good canon ocellus content. i love her and want her in the au#but i am NOT putting that dumbass school in this au its not happening. so she'll be doing something else#echoed voice
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so much discussion currently over whether or not the girl I was crazy about when I was 15 ever realised she was gay
#there is a pride pic of her in lesbian colours but idk#Ik i sound like a dumb queer saying that but still#I had such a giant crush on her I was clearly unwell tho I was weird about it#but I was 15. and experiencing my first gay crush since I’d come out to myself#also she’s been in London the past few weeks??? but she’s a northerner#a few weeks is a long time to be in London im legit wondering if she moved down#I need to learn to be normal about things also yes ik i crush on everyone shush
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anyways if nick fartez and any of his skeevy fans are spying on me online I needja to know this: no one will ever love you or like you or fuck you and its all your fault bc your a nazi. the only way you'll ever get anything is if you rape someone and you and I both know that doesnt mean shit except how desperate you are to stick your dick in someone and how much you're willing to violate people who actively dislike you and would never be around you if it was their choice. it didn't hafta be this way but you decided being a ugly skeevy nazi was more important than anything, which is sad. honestly jump off a cliff, save yourself the time.
#posting this bc idk where I saw the clip maybe a vaush video or keffals or some shit but he mentions his 'jewish bully' which he says in a#way thats obvious he doesnt actually have one but seems like a direct reference to me and how I would vent about having a bully who was#jewish also. but the whole point I was making in the first place is that her being jewish has nothing to do with her being a bully. its#whatever trauma that made her so shitty bc otherwise her sister was really nice to me and we got along and were friends#just thought I should post this to remind them since they probably hate watch me and try to see me as a lolcow to compensate#for their own shitty fuckless lives.#hey at least I can get some lmao.#really makes me wonder though. who exactly is reporting to him about me? I WONDER if its the same person I keep kinda#coming to the conclusion about that theyre secretly a alt righter which is why they desperately try to paint me as one.#i mean hey bud! why were you writing lyrics to a song about hitler on your kupika?#im sure you're so so happy that that website is taken down. too bad I have screenshots and video evidence of it huh 😢#+everything else about you and your history ik about and the shit you cover up like. it kinda seems like its compiling into one thing.#innit ya channer? hey at least I thought those conspiracy theories were about something else entirely. you prolly know exactly what#theyre referencing. which is probably why when I started talking about them not knowing what they really meant you instead#saw it as an opportunity to take down a trans person. and also why you somehow knew about the “bohemian grove” and were the#first person to tell me about it. but whatever no ones gonna believe me... for now.#cant wait for the day your ass gets exposed for the shitty skeevy fuck you really are xoxoxo#though who knows. maybe nick and his fuckless followers picked up on me from vaush's chat. but honestly I feel like i'm such a nobody ass#person on there that idk why they would. so kinda think its someone else. someone who might've been following me for longer.......#and was the first person to tell me about the bohemian grove and also enabled and egged on the conspircy theory beliefs 🤔🤔🤔🤔
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(george martin voice) My Gahd what if people stumbling upon my blog think my special interest is george martin of g*me of thr*nes fame. what then
#(obviously i don't anticipate this happening but can you fucking imagine)#i also always wonder if my about reads as my special interests being george martin 🔥AND STING🔥 or if the sting part doesn't come across#or seems like a joke#ik ik its not screen reader friendly im sorry#i should probably change it to just text anyway. i used the image bc it's a joke with the homies#and bc at first i Was sorta formatting it as a joke. but it's def not a joke now lmao#anyway . don't mind me i am just t i am just talking out loud#psychobabble
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OK SO WHAT ABOUT ALASTOR X FEM READER EXCEPT READER DOESNT KNOW HOW TO REACT TO HIS CHIVALRY
So this takes place before they start dating and the beginning of the relationship. Reader basically has never met a guy who has chivalry(or is respectful) like ALASTOR, so when Alastor’s mannerisms come out, reader just looks at him like “wtf are you doing?” BUT NOT IN A MEAN WAY, more like in a confused way because they’re from a time where chivalry isn’t as popular(especially to women in general) and reader was raised to be tough(but it’s still nice to get treated like a lady). So whenever alastor acts like that reader just gets awkward and shy.
IM ASKING FOR THIS CUZ LIKE THE GUYS NOW HAVE NO RESPECT OR CHIVALRY like alastor😔😒 (ik not ALL guys but most guys now and days are jackasses)
Hnnng I fucking love this ✨️
Alastor X Reader Headcanons
✅️Romantic
❌️Platonic
TW: Harassment, Men being nasty
Description: ☝️⬆️
Back when you were alive, men never did the sort of things that Alastor does unless they wanted to get laid
Most of the men you knew had tendencies to act like frat boys or old perverts
Only having one goal in mind and if they got rejected then they got fucking nasty as hell with you
On top of that, you didn't have the luxury of growing up to be soft and helpless like some people
You had to be strong and look out for yourself, you rarely looked to others for help
Not even your own family
Some people didn't even look at you as a woman, just as some tough badass who didn't need anyone's helping hand
At least you hoped that how they looked at you
Not that you would've rejected the offer if anyone actually tried to help you out, everyone needs a hand now and then
The only people who ever offered any sort of help were horny guys who offered to help you let off some steam with them
Fuck off
But Alastor grew up in a very different time than you and his way of treating you always gave you whiplash
He would never dream of asking you to fuck within the first few days of knowing each other, or even the first month wtf kind of animals have men turned into??
You don't even wanna know, Alastor
His little pet names alone made you flustered but his actions??? A whole other monster in itself
When you first met him this crazy guy kissed your hand like you were in some regency movie
You were so shy afterwards that you couldn't look him in the eyes, your cheeks hot and pink
One time, Alastor actually took off his coat and put it over a puddle for you step on
Didn't you just beat up some guy for ripping it???
You could've just stepped over the puddle in the first place??? Why did you do that??
"I did what any proper gentleman would do for a lady such as yourself, Y/N..!"
You gotta look away at that point or else he would see how hot your face is getting, feeling flustered
Alastor actually asked you to dance to a song that wasn't meant for grinding and sweating on each other??
You blush and mumble something about not knowing how to dance to music like this and instead of making fun of you Alastor teaches you how
He's a wonderful dancer and leads the entire time, not letting you make a fool of yourself in front of everyone
You've never felt your heart do skip so many beats before
You're trying to ignore what some random lecherous demon is saying about your body and the things he would do to it??
Guess what-
"Now that is not the way to start a proper conversation with a lady of Y/N's status, or any lady for that matter."
Alastor scares him off for you and won't even accept your thanks in return, making your legs wobbly
Once your suffering with feelings for Alastor then every little thing he does makes you turn into a gooey puddle
It doesn't stop when he's suddenly courting you, only getting worse with each romantic act
He brings you flowers, dedicates entire broadcasts to you, asks you to take evening strolls with him
He does all this and never even expects a parting kiss from you, simply happy to be in your presence
When/why the fuck did men stop acting like this?? This is so much better than how they were back when you were alive-
You get flustered just at the sight of him now, wondering just how he's going to make you swoon today
Alastor is slowly getting you accustomed to how he believes you should always be treated, happy that you're no longer confused by his actions
This motherfucker just Pavlov-ed you into falling for him
This was so fun to write!! I hope I did a good enough job!!
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