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newbie-whumping · 4 years

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Whumptober Day 18

Panic! at the Disco

Prompt: panic attacks/phobias/paranoia

Kat isn’t normally one for parties, especially after everything, but today has been a pretty good day, and Asriel promised they could leave at any time. So, here she is, tail flicking as Asriel knocks on the door.

It opens, revealing a tall human who grins at them. “Hey! Glad you could make it,” they say, clapping Asriel on the shoulder.

“Thanks for the invite,” he responds with a cheery grin.

The next words are drowned out to Kat as she looks in at the party. The house is relatively dark, lit by multicolored lights and a disco ball, and the music sounds good for dancing. People seem to be enjoying themselves. Kat feels... Off. She pushes the feeling away, though. It’s been a good day, and parties can be fun.

Asriel moves inside and she follows, giving the host a small smile and wave.

Unsurprisingly, Asriel makes a beeline for the snacks. She goes with him, curious about what’s there. There’s not much that interests her currently - maybe something will as the night goes on - so she tentatively separates from Asriel, wandering around a bit. She stops to talk to some of her friends who happened to be attending as well; it’s a welcome distraction from everything that shouldn’t be bothering her. And isn’t. She’s fine; the party is really quite nice.

Things blur. She finds herself with a drink and some snacks, munching quietly. She can feel the bass of the music in her nose.

Things blur again. She finds herself seated on a couch, nodding along to the conversation she isn’t listening to. She has the thought that she doesn’t know where Asriel is. She hasn’t seen him in...

...how long has it been?

It’s probably fine. It’s a party, after all. He’s probably just being a social butterfly; he’s very good at that. He thrives in it, really. She doesn’t know anyone who loves talking to people as much as he does.

Blur. Things are darker. She can still feel the bass. She still doesn’t know where Asriel is. There’s a bit of a buzz in her head - probably from the drink earlier. She had more, didn’t she? It feels like she did. There’s someone talking to her, she can’t process what they’re saying. She can feel someone touching her, she can’t tell if it’s real or not; it might be real, there’s a lot of people around. She still doesn’t know where Asriel is, she’s trying to find him, pushing through people. She knows he’s here, he has to be here, they came together and he wouldn’t just leave her he would find her before he left he has to be around here somewhere he wouldn’t just leave her here in hell -

A hand falls on her shoulder and she flinches and jumps, spinning away from whoever it is. It happens again, this time with both hands. She’s spun to face him. He says something, she can’t hear him, she whimpers out an apology over and over she knows she did something she knows she’s going to be punished she has to mitigate how bad it is she can do that she can be good.

He leads her outside to the cooler night air, the quieter night air. “Breathe, sweetheart. Just breathe. You’re okay. Tell me some things you can see.”

“Grass. Concrete. Black. Black.”

“Can you see the stars?”

A wordless nod. “What about the streetlamp over there?”

Another nod.

“What do you feel?”

“Concrete. Cold. Cold, can’t...”

“Can you feel the grass? It’s cold, but it’ll warm up if you stand there long enough.”

She nods. “It’s a little chilly out, huh?”

She nods again. “Do you want to sit with me?”

She does, sitting right next to him.

“Is it okay if I pet you?”

She’s motionless for a while, then nods. He’s gentle, always gentle.

“Did you get to try any of the food they put out?”

She nods after a moment.

“I think it was pretty good. Then again, I think almost anything is good.” He chuckles. “The salsa was almost as good as Mom’s though. I could’ve eaten that entire bowl.”

“Mmh.”

“I was kinda hoping there’d be pizza or something, but I guess they wanted to go cheaper. With that many people, they’d easily had to have gotten at least fifty bucks worth of it.”

She chuckles weakly. “Lots.”

“Yeah, that’d be a lot of pizza. They could’ve given most of it to me, though. I would’ve been able to finish off five on my own. Plus, if you wanted, you could have some when you felt like it.” He scratches behind her ears.

“Mmh.”

“The sodas were good choices too. I thought about having a margarita instead, honestly, but considering I agreed to drive, probably not the best idea.”

“Yeah.”

He continues on, letting the topic shift naturally and leaving enough room for Kat to answer, if she wants. She usually has at least one thing to say.

Asriel’s tip that she’s feeling okay again comes in the form of consistent full sentences, at which point he lets the conversation drop and just pets her.

“Thanks, Azzy,” she murmurs after a while.

“Of course. You feeling better?”

She nods.

“Do you wanna stay?”

She shakes her head.

“Okay. Do you mind waiting a moment while I go tell them goodbye?”

Another head shake. “Thanks.” He kisses her head. “I’ll be back out in just a moment.”

He quickly says his goodbyes, then the two get into their car, driving in silence. Kat feels drained, quiet as a consequence. All she wants to do is snuggle with Asriel and go to bed.

She gets her wish.

#whumptober2020 #no. 18 #panic attacks #kat #fic #tw: panic attack #whump #whumptober #whump prompts #whumptober prompts #whump responses #whumptober responses #whumptober day 18 #whumptober day eighteen #timeline: hopeless

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