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#i opened fucking MART instead of my profile
celeryw · 1 year
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NOOO MY PROFILE BUTTON GOT REPLACED NOOO
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valkyrieskwad · 4 years
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here ya go, have some like, awkward college baby gays.
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when sam planned out her apology, the last person she expected to answer kara's door was lena. as in, lena from the halloween party who she had sex with. but, there she is. wearing nothing but kara's flannel, looking pretty and fucking soft. this is the first time sam's seen her up close in good lighting, not drunk off her ass, and all she can focus on are her eyes. they're different colors.
"hello?" lena says after a second.
right. "is kara here?" sam asks. it's too aggressive, but she feels a little off-kilter looking at lena. she's here to apologize, though, she reminds herself. "can you tell her i'm not here to fight, and i know she hears me."
"she's actually not here," lena says, stepping out of the way to pull the door open wider. "but you're welcome to come in and wait for her. it's good to see you. you look really good."
"you remember me?" sam asks, like a fucking idiot. lena laughs a little. "right," she gushes, scratching at the back of her neck. she steps inside the room and lets lena shut the door behind her. it feels easier talking when she's not making eye contact. "i didn’t mean it that way. it's just that you're—"
"don't say something dumb," lena cuts her off. "i like you, don't ruin it."
sam fights the urge to repeat you like me incredulously. instead, she walks over to take a seat on kara's bed and tries not to think too much about sitting on kara's bed. where kara probably had sex with lena. maybe even right before this. of course, she's still managing to think about it. "so, you and kara. you a thing or something?"
lena shrugs, leans her hip against the standard edition dorm room desk. "or something."
there's a really awkward pause. then, "cool," is what sam finally says.
lena smiles, eyes glistening in a way that makes sam feel transparent. she clears her throat. "i’d love to be, but i’m pretty sure she's holding out for a thing with you, and i somehow got caught in the middle of this."
"what?" sam coughs. the only thing between kara and her is animosity; maybe even hate. she doesn't even think about kara outside of that. in fact, she spends most of her day Not Thinking About Kara. "did she say that?"
it comes out more curious than she intends it, which lena definitely notices. "more or less."
sam can't tell if lena's fucking with her, but the room feels too hot now. "in those words? like, she likes me?"
that one even comes out hopeful. lena's picking up every little nuance; sam can see it on her face. "you can discuss it when she gets back."
"no, i -" she shouldn't go down that rabbit hole, not sure if her heart or brain or soccer season can handle it. "i'm just here to apologize for being the reason we lost today. i can admit when i fucked up."
"you should have passed the ball," lena points out. "she had a clear shot."
"i know." there's another long pause, sam tapping the tips of her fingers together, lena looking content to watch her fidget. sam's the one to break the silence. "i don't like her, you know? we aren't - it's not like that. she doesn't like me. it's just a rivalry."
"she called me sam while we were having sex last week. she told me about you two, what happened first year."
sam's cheeks heat up so fast she doesn't even bother trying to hide she's blushing. she's lost count of the number of times she's gotten off to remembering kara's voice in her ear. she hates herself for it. "we had sex orientation weekend, and then the next day at soccer practice she barely looked at me. she just kept trying to show me up. so i kept trying to show her up, and now we're here."
lena actually laughs, then rolls her eyes like sam is being ridiculous. "that happened three years ago, and you still haven't talked about it?"
"what's there to talk about?"
"i don't know, her moaning your name during sex, maybe."
"whatever," sam mumbles.
"whatever," lena mocks. "i'm pretty sure she's only interested in me because she saw us together."
"don't tell me you actually believe that," sam frowns. "even if she is interested in me, there's no way she's not interested in you."
"maybe," lena says. then the door lock clicks and the handle turns, and suddenly there's kara. too soon and too unexpectedly, with her joggers and her loose t-shirt and the dumb way she staggers when she walks inside a door. she's carrying two bags from the downstairs mini mart and a subway sandwich. hair tied up in a messy ponytail. lips too fucking pink.
sam freezes. she forgot what exactly she came here to do.
"she came to apologize," lena tells kara, and sam realizes, awkwardly, they've just been staring at each other. kara's eyes are so blue, it's not fucking fair. sam feels more undressed now than she did the last time she was on kara's bed. "and, don't get me wrong, i don't think that's a bad place to start, but i told her you two should probably talk about more than just tonight or losing the game. especially since, you know, you can't keep her name out of your mouth."
"lee," kara says, calm, like she's fond enough of lena she's skipped shocked or upset and landed head-first on acceptance. "you didn't."
"i did, and she blushed, now discuss," lena gestures. "this is almost making up for my favorite show being on hiatus."
"we're not entertainment," kara pouts.
"not with that attitude," lena smiles. "but i believe in you. you can do it."
"i'm just here to - i'm sorry," sam says, then she stands up, keeping her eyes on the floor.
she's fucking glad for it, too, because she's pretty sure her string snaps when kara sighs. "sit back down, please. she's right, you know? even though we should talk about which information is not okay to disclose." lena whispers sorry. sam sits back down. she looks up just in time to watch kara glide the couple steps between them and plop down on the bed next to her, so close their thighs knock together. sam tries not to think about it. "i guess lena let the cat out of the bag, so no need to tiptoe around it."
"you still like me, so what?" sam says. she feels defensive.
kara carves right through it, though; first by blinking at her silently, then by opening one of the mini mart bags and offering sam a pint of mango talenti. "i do," kara says, slowly. she glances up at lena like she's checking if that's okay. lena's still smiling so sam supposes it is. it feels like she's in the twilight zone. she just wanted to apologize, but instead, she's doing whatever the fuck this is. she takes the ice cream and twists the cap off. kara relaxes a little. "that isn't to say we should do something about it, just that i don't actually dislike you."
sam wants to do something about it. it's her first thought. she won't say that. "what do you want me to say?"
kara looks at lena again. lena rolls her eyes. "you can say you like her, too. you can say you don't. you can say you want to be friends. anything, really. just don't lie, or worse - say nothing."
"i don't dislike you, either," sam says, fast enough she can't stop herself.
then she ducks her head and eats four scoops of the ice cream while kara stares at her profile. "cool," kara says, and then there's nothing else for a long while again. finally, after what feels like forever, kara huffs and asks, "you want to watch iron chef?"
"what?" sam asks, looking up, halfway to a brain freeze.
"lena and i have been marathoning it," kara explains. "it's what we do after, um. hanging out."
"i know you have sex," sam says flatly.
"is that okay?" kara asks.
it catches sam off guard. her opinion shouldn't matter, so she says as much. "does it matter what i think?"
"it does to me," kara says, then, "since we're being honest."
"i don't mind," sam says. it's not a lie, but it's also not a full truth. she's not jealous of lena; she likes lena. she's mostly just jealous that lena gets to have a piece of kara and she doesn't. "it's not like i can compete with lena."
that one catches kara off guard. she just stares at sam for a while. sam goes back to her ice cream. "you can, but you don't have to," kara says after a bit. "feel free to interpret that whichever way you want."
"i don't know what that means," sam mumbles.
"it means i can stay or i can leave," lena explains. "either way, you two are hanging out tonight. this isn't a competition."
oh, sam thinks. "oh," she says. "you can stay if you're good with that."
so lena stays.
they turn on iron chef then, kara squeezed between sam and lena, their backs against the wall on the twin-sized dorm bed. it feels fucking ridiculous, but sam settles into it, pressed against kara's shoulder. lena's asleep with her head on kara's lap by the time they announce the culinary curveball. sam can't stop watching kara's hand, tracing lena's ear, fingers snaking through her hair.
"does she always fall asleep?" she asks.
"like clockwork," kara says, "but she's not satisfied if we don't watch, then i get so caught up in it i can't sleep."
"that's cute."
"she is."
"i know," sam says, then immediately wants to take it back. "sorry, i didn't mean - i just. i really don't mind you dating, i swear."
"that's good," kara smiles, then moves her free hand from resting on her own thigh to resting on sam's. she doesn't even take her eyes off the laptop screen in front of them. sam feels like she's having a fucking heart attack. "this show is always so intense."
"you're touching me," sam says. she can't pretend it's not happening. "are you making a move?"
thankfully, kara just squeezes her thigh instead of moving her hand away. sam's not quite ready for her to go yet, but she can't sit here with them not addressing it. "should i not?"
it's not even a challenge; it's an honest question. sam wants to give an honest answer, but deflecting feels better. "is she okay with it?"
"yeah, she's fine," kara responds, thumbing over lena's ear as she says it. "pretty sure she has everything she wants right here."
"well, in that case," sam says, losing her thought briefly when kara squeezes her thigh again. "i guess it's fine."
"cool," kara says, so they watch the rest of the episode like that.
when the countdown starts to play another, everything feels tense. they're both tired from the game today, they should sleep, but they can't all fit on this bed. sam will have to go, probably. she's not ready to go. "hey," she starts, settling her hand on top of kara's.
"we can watch another," kara says right away. lena's out hard at this point, face smashed against kara's belly, snoring lightly. sam wants to be that comfortable, but she's jittery just touching kara's hand. "unless you want to go."
"not yet," sam admits.
kara flips her hand over, letting sam thumb over her palm, play with her fingers as the next episode starts up. "good," she says. "i'm not ready for you to go yet."
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lord-dusk · 5 years
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Jurassic Emblem-Chapter 13
The story’s getting hot and thirsty guys ^u^ You might want to spray your genetic material at pregnancy art every once in a while reading. Enjoy!
  Lucina was not surprised to hear that the next Aberrant Forms to target next were located in Ylisse. When she and Blue had returned to Askr, beaten up Teba and Warbler and threw back into their cells alongside Basilice, Commander Anna had announced to the raptors that their next mission will bring them to the Exalted Princess’s home country. This time, Lucina decided to have her daddy watch over the mercs and bring along the raptor squad. And Ryukami decided to lounge in the fish pond after several days of swimming in the open ocean.
  When  Chrom’s ex-wife Grima was righteously turned into a Wal-Mart store, the now King of Ylisse had declared open desertification to the already dry conditions of his country. He figured that by rendering his land inhospitable, neighboring countries would have no reason to invade. Indeed, when the local residents uprooted native grasses and drained the rivers, even goblins didn’t want to live in an area with barely any supply of water. But that also meant Ylisseans found it quite difficult to grow crops and petitioned to King Chrom to forgive his neighbors and open up to other nations.
But Chrom wasn’t having any of this shit. He had long since closed off any trade routes out of a deep-seated grudge for that cunt-licker Gangrel and proceeded to dessicate the ecosystem even further. And do you remember how Sha’Rad Yuwi had released a strain of flakka-induced rabies to the country? Well in truth, the virus didn’t kill off Ylisseans entirely, it just sped the catastrophe along. It wasn’t until after his retainer Frederick died did Chrom truly wished he partnered with Prince Xander of Nohr instead of taking his anger out on his non-family.
 “I could really go for a drink,” Echo remarked, trekking in the hot sand. “If we don’t reach the boss of this level soon I don’t think I can refrain from spilling blood in front of you girls.”
“Well, it’s not exactly ideal, but all the nutrients an organism needs,” Delta said,”is condensed right in its kin. But Echo, you know, I know, and we all know that we need to stick together for survival and the last thing Blue wants is for us to dissect each other.”
“Umm, yeah, and don’t even think about lapping up your own pee,” Blue jumped in. “those mistakes of human beings who drink urine for “survival” obviously have too much free time on their hands.” She surveyed the wide desert environment, a few temnospondyl skeletons littered the sandscape. 
Charlie, the little velociraptor, was panting. “Are we there yet? I’m even happy to eat plants if it means getting some nice cool H2O.”
Blue cocked her head to look at her youngest sister. “Tell you what Charlie,” she said. “when we tackle down this baddie of this level, why don’t we all go bathe in Askr’s moat? The trout swimming there are quite delectable I have to say.”
“But I’m so thiiirsty,” Charlie whined. “even now, the last water molecules I have in my body are leaving me.” 
Lucina tapped her hand on the jungle-green raptor. “Now I might sound as convincing as say, Sole Survivor here but you’ve been a good girl Charlie.” She scrunched up her left arm, reveal bare flesh. “Here, if you have to , bite my arm and lap my blood.”
Blue’s eyes widened. “Future Witness, you do know that the moment my little sister chomps your arm, septic bacteria will flood your wound, right? There’s no medical help around here for miles.”
Lucina shrugged. “Sepsis or not, Charlie is in genuine need to rehydrate, and I want to do what I can to save everyone I love, including you.” The green-brown dinosaur sank her teeth into the Exalted princess’s bare arm. The navy girl flinched in response as  warm,dark crimson flowed from Charlie’s jaws.
The blue-striped velociraptor sighed. “I can’t change your choice of action, but if you collapse on the ground because you got an infection, remember that it was you who initiated it.” 
“No need to tell me,” the Exalted Princess replied maternally, Charlie suckling on her bloody arm.
                                             ***************
  Blue didn’t like her counterpart’s decision, but she had to respect it. As carnivorous animals didn’t exactly practice oral hygiene after their meals, flesh-eating bacteria more often than not inhabited their mouths and despite Lucina applying sand, pressure, and a tunic fashioned from her cape unto her wound after nursing Charlie, the navy-blue raptor knew damn well it was only a matter of time before infection set in and ate away at Lucina’s arm, eventually requiring amputation at best. They had to hurry and complete their mission.
 Unsurprisingly to Lucina prior to their departure, the Aberrant Forms were residing in the ruined castle in the former Halidon of Ylisse, which made traveling there a relative breeze. Aside from the occasional scampering compsognathus hopping about on some crumbling pillars, there wan’t really anything to impede the raptors’ mission to defeat the boss of this area. 
Well, at least anything that wasn’t heavily armored or bearing a sharp saber.
Blue and company were about to take a step toward’s Luci’s former residence and a woman in orchid mounting on top of a spiky turtle-like ankylosaurus met them at the entrance. 
“Howdy cutie babes!” the ankylosaurus greeted them enthusiastically, his eyes gleeming with endorphins. “It’s always nice when I get to see cute young women like you for these hard eyes!”
“Oh great, a wounded girl and four little lizards,” the white and pink woman remarked. “I ought to be killing my sisters and instead I’m stuck here with this pervy turtle and chopping up trespassers.”
Blue walked up to them. “Umm, hello. We’re here to see the boss of this level, and ideally, we would like to defeat them bore Future Witness here lands in critical condit-
WHOOOMP! A spike-laden tail ending in a hard club had just barely missed Blue as the charcoal blue-striped dromaeosaur leaped back. The ankylosaur was swinging his tail, stirring up a cloud of dust.
“Awww, do we really hav’ta go this route? I heard the world of Fire Emblem is full of hot voluptuous chicks and it’ll be such a disgrace if I smashed their frail bodies.” the chelonian-esque dinosaur commented, still thrashing his tail in confrontation.
“Grandpa Havoc, does it really matter whether we kill men or women?” The orchid woman sighed. “At the end of the day, anyone who stands in our way is just a walking juice-box with organs floating in it, gender or no gender.”
“Awww, but Zero, don’t ya think girls like you and those veloci-vixens make bloody anime and games more digestible? The viewers don’t want to experience a Chernobyl gas-leak 20 times a day.” the ankylosaur named Havoc protested.
On the other hand Blue and her sisters were at a standstill. The white woman named Zero could perhaps be taken out with the raptor swarming at her, but Havoc was proven to be a hard hurdle. Somewhere, deep within the fabric of their DNA, just like their ancestors knew 80 million years ago, Blue and her siblings knew ankylosaurs were the pinnacle of armored dinosaurs. A low-profile body enveloped with numerous osteoderms and spikes were already diffult to penetrate enough, then there is the delightful bit that fatal tail-club is more than blunt enough to break the leg bones of a tyrannosaur. Did I also mentioned that ankys’ heads were armored to the extent that even their eyelids took eye-protection to the extreme? The raptors could plan a surprise attack but they need to think hard, and fast-
“Okay Veloci-Volutuous-Vixens, since you’re at a lost here, I think I’m gonna make life easier for you gals and let you pass.” Havoc said.
Blue tilted her head. “...? Did I hear that just right?”
“Why yes, my dear dromeaosaurid theropod. You girls can proceed to the boss fight up ahead, on one condition.”
“And what would that be?” Delta asked.
Havoc smiled. “Why, since you gorgeous girls are in humanoid form, why don’t you unzip those pants and reveal them lacy bras to this tired anky here?”
“....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................are you fucking serious!?” the raptors exclaimed in shock and disbelief.
“I cannot say it is a lie. Even with rex blood pumped into a ya, no raptors can ever flip over an anyklosaurus like me, let alone the king of the dinosaurs. I’m just making things easier for y’all.” Grandpa Havoc eyed Lucina and her bandaged left arm. “and I think if she were to knock boots with my waifu Zero here, I think ya’ll and I struck a deal-OW!!”
Zero had jabbed her sword right in Havoc’s head out of annoyance. “If you’d like me to kill you for assuming I’m like my slutty sister Five, absolutely help yourself Havoc.” She hissed as she jumped off her comrade. As Havoc was trying her shake the erect sword off his head, Zero strided towards Luci and placed a small glowing blue orb in her hand. “W-what is this?” Lucina asked.
“Theorectically I can heal that fleshy boo-boo of your while bedding you child, but I am not a horny slut like Five, so I’m giving you this.” Zero said, not smiling. “this orb will prevent any infections to your body, at least in the moment.” 
“O-oh. Thank you.” Luci bowed her head.
“As for you lizards though,” Zero continued to the raptors. “it IS possible to crush that pervy turtle-lizard thing but you’d have to use spears or magic. In other words: better luck next time!”
Though Delta wouldn’t admit it, she got a very sensational, soft, and wet feeling from hearing Zero’s bold statement. She looked at her other siblings, Blue, Echo, and Charlie, as well as Lucina. “Alright, we’ll shed our outer layers,” The green-blue velociraptor commenced.
And when the ankylosaurus Grandpa Havoc turned his head to see the girls pulling off their shirts, unzipping their pants, and patting their lacy underwear, the sword jammed into his head suddenly loosened and fell off. There was hardlt any better treat than to see cute females donning 2-piece lacy lingerie, revealing lustrous breasts, smooth thighs, and a full abdomen.
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